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Topics - Zaratustra

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Thaddeus Boyd's Panel of Death / God Save The Queen
« on: October 17, 2013, 01:40:05 AM »
You think the US sucks with immigrants? At least your Home Office is not sending legal immigrants text messages telling them to go home.

Real Life / Internettery
« on: September 24, 2013, 03:08:58 AM »
Horse_ebooks is fake.

I don't think I can go on.

How to Pronounce Horse_ebooks

Assorted Creations / Megamon Pokeman
« on: September 06, 2013, 06:23:48 AM »

There's pretty much zilch to do at this point. You can go into the wild grass, fight enemies from MM1-3, and capture them. That's it.

Not sure if I'll keep doing stuff but you can surely suggest stuff or offer to do stuff or stuff.

This uses the excellent Pokemon Essentials library for RPG Maker XP, but I had to headbutt it a few times to make some abilities work. If there's bugs, open Data/errorlog.txt and paste it here.

Assorted Creations / Zara's Dumb Applet Emporium
« on: August 19, 2013, 08:52:04 AM »
Sometimes I make dumb javascript or unity or whatever programs. This is their story. If you have some idea what I could do with these feel free to blurt it out.

DELTA - makes variations of pokemon with different types.

ALCHEMY - trying to replicate homestuck's alchemizing.

CRAFTS - same but for a regular crafting system.

CHRONOID - random characters for board game Chrononauts.

LANDSCAPE - walk on a landscape that gets progressively deformed.

XKCDWORD - makes passwords like in

ABILITIES - makes random abilities for a RPG (originally intended for Abraxas)

LIGHTING - test of platformer tile lighting

Gaming Discussion / Rogue Legacy
« on: July 02, 2013, 02:12:30 AM »
So it's easy to change the hero names.

\steamapps\common\Rogue Legacy\Content

Forum Games / Awesomeventure
« on: June 20, 2013, 11:28:26 AM »
So I'm going to try to run a Lexicon game. Lexicon is a wiki game and you can read the rules here (they're also on the game wiki)

Obviously we're going to write about a game. Awesomeventure is an action-adventure with roleplaying elements that was the best game for the Myew-1000 console in 1989. You will write a wiki that both details the game and explains how to get through it.

Anyone is free to join if they're not an ass. Just go to the link below, read the rules and start playing.

Assorted Creations / Cardinal
« on: January 11, 2013, 06:22:26 PM »
A roguelike based on Mercury (

Numpad/qwe-a d-zxc moves (you may need to turn numlock on/off)
you can also click to move

suggestions for abilities welcome

Assorted Creations / Card Crossfire
« on: January 04, 2013, 06:51:11 PM »
One player uses a Magic: The Gathering deck, one uses a Pokemon deck, and one uses a Yu-Gi-Oh deck.

- MtG player loses per usual rules: if they are reduced to 0 life points, can't draw a card or gain 10 poison counters.
- Pokemon player loses if they can't draw a card at the start of their turn, have no Pokemon in play or have had six of their Pokemon defeated.
- Yu-Gi-Oh player loses if reduced to 0 life or can't draw a card.

Damage scales 1 MtG - 10 Pokemon - 500 Yu-Gi-Oh.

Type and color equivalences are:

Creature - Pokemon - Monster
Land - Energy - X
Enchantment - Stadium - Continuous/Field
Sorcery - Trainer - Spell
Instant - N/A - Quick-Play/Trap
Artifact - N/A - Equip

Lightning - Light - White
Water - Water - Blue
Psychic - Wind - Blue
Fire/Fighting - Fire - Red
Grass/Metal - Earth - Green
Darkness - Dark - Black

Now to work on combat.

Assorted Creations / Don't Hate The Game, Hate The Developer
« on: November 28, 2012, 12:59:57 PM »
Giana Sisters Twisted Dreams continues the Giana tradition of ripping off games (in this case, the world-switched mechanic is ripped from vaunted indie classic, TIME FCUK) Play as Giana and... Giana, I guess, as you rescue your sister Maria that looks just like you (I was so baffled by the plot that I thought I was controlling two different characters, one of which was kidnapped but was also with me somehow?)

The art is pretty good if repetitive, the music is pretty good. The level design is atrocious. It's so starting-level you can smell the acne of the game design pregrad they got to make it for pennies on the dollar. Sparse enemies in some areas, long stretches of instant death traps without checkpoints in others, and infuckingterminable stretches of terrain where you will be doing nothing but dodging left and right and clicking the world-switch button to grab the correct color of gems like some demented Ikaruga.

Oh, and the difference between dimensions? Some doors are open in one and not the other. And vice versa.

Online Hookers / Mercury
« on: September 07, 2012, 07:27:13 AM »

private server code: a9dfqp978t

Real Life / Steam Greenlight
« on: September 05, 2012, 05:01:01 AM »
OK. so Greenlight is now requiring a one-time donation of $100 to get into the poll.

Indies are fricking abuzz about this. On one hand I think that if your game is not going to provide a return for $100, it shouldn't really be on Steam. On the other hand I can understand many indies live in some sort of high-functioning squalor, so I'm torn.

Also this thread is for games you see on Greenlight that are good. I found this rather interesting thing while looking around:

High-Context Discourse / Ergonomics
« on: August 27, 2012, 06:16:50 AM »
the first semester of my computer classes was all typing classes

Assorted Creations / Craftstudio
« on: March 19, 2012, 06:58:43 AM »
Let's try doing something with this.

Gaming Discussion / Desura
« on: January 26, 2012, 11:37:56 AM »
Desura is a Steam-like program that is pretty good at making indie games available.

Gaming Discussion / Best 10 Games From Obscure Platforms
« on: November 06, 2011, 09:18:07 AM »
In which I (and you) make a list of games that never got released in the NES, Genesis, etc. or got released in inferior ports.

First: the MSX. Not the MSX2, that'll come later.

10: Bokosuka Wars: Yes, that very same. This game actually makes -sense- in the MSX release.
9: Ale Hop: A nice obstacle-course game.
8: Lazy Jones - A silly collection of minigames.
7: The Goonies: The best version of the original Goonies game is on the MSX.
6: King's Valley: Konami puzzle game.
5: La Abadía del Crimen: Complicated and entirely in Spanish, but one of the best developed games for the platform.
4: Thexder: Also had a NES version, but the MSX version is superior.
3 & 2: The Castle & The Castle Excellent: These two games use the same engine - first one is action, second one is puzzle. The NES port was miserable. I remade them but the remake crashes all the time so I should probably remake them again.
1: Maze of Galious: The gigantic Metroidvania that inspired La-Mulana. Has a rather decent PC remake.

Gaming Discussion / The Binding of Isaac
« on: September 29, 2011, 08:13:33 AM »
Zelda roguelike for $4.5 on steam.

Protips follow:

* To bridge holes, bomb a rock next to them.
* Satan sells items in exchange for your own permanent health (1 or 2 hearts)
* Clearing rooms fills your item gauge (some items fill slower than others)
* No items kill you on use outright, though a select few may damage you.

Team Fortress 2 / TF2 Boardgame
« on: August 07, 2011, 09:41:15 AM »

For 2-8 players in 2 teams.
Each team has 6 units (on a 2 player game each player controls 6, on a 4 player game each controls 3, and so on). Everyone starts at their team's spawn.
On each team's turn the players can do a move (most units move 1 square per turn) and an attack action (attacking a unit on the same or on an adjacent square) for each unit they control.


Assorted Creations / Super Bronto Brothers
« on: January 06, 2011, 10:26:46 AM »

it's time to make levels

These rules are mostly cribbed from the Talking Time wiki:

* Each person can make one level per world. Try to fill worlds that have less levels.
* When saving level and graphics files, always put your name first, followed by the world it's supposed to go in, and then the level name itself. For example, "zaidyer-w4-rawhorsepower.lvl".
* You're allowed to use custom graphics and music. Always bundle them in a folder with the exact name as your level file. (Don't actually put the level file in this folder, SMBX episodes don't work that way!)
* Levels should be winnable with either Mario or Luigi. The only exception to this rule is if you've designed a level that absolutely needs a specific brother, because they have slightly different physics.
* Always put starting locations for both players. (In case of AWESOME, that's why.)
* Levels should always have a working checkpoint, no matter how hard you think the level is. The only exception to this rule is if you're building a level for World Nine. (Checkpoints may also be removed from levels in other worlds, but only if playtesting reveals they're not needed.)
* The game can only support one checkpoint per level. If you have multiple checkpoints, the first one the player hits will be the only one that counts.
* Levels should be winnable without being forced to take a hit.
* Never trap the player. If a certain item or powerup is needed to progress in the level, make sure it either respawns, or the player can die if he lost it.
* Enemies should always work the way they did in the game they're originally from.
* All water and waterfalls should be swimmable.
* Invisible blocks should never be made necessary to finish the level.
* Never put Lakitu in any area where you can scroll the screen vertically. He'll try to compensate by approaching infinite speed.
* The SMB3 Lakitu enemy is ruthless and can only throw those green rolling spinies. Instead of using him, pick the NPC you want and make sure the "Lakitu" option on the left side of the NPC panel is set to "yes". This will create a much tamer SMW Lakitu who will throw that NPC regularly.
* Horizontal autoscrolling is a bit glitchy. Only use it for flying levels.
* No Red Coin levels. But you can still use Red Coins if you treat them the way they worked in NSMB Wii: Hit a switch, and try to grab eight in rapid succession for a reward, before time runs out and they go away. You'll have to fiddle with events to get it to work, though.
* If you add Dragon Coins (Yoshi Coins), keep it to five on average, but no more than eight.
* Remember that if you put a powerup in a block, it will be a mushroom if Mario is small. Putting just mushrooms will mean they'll always be mushrooms no matter what. (Hammer and Tanooki suits will always be suits, as well.)
* Style your "end zone" with the Power Star like SMB3. Be sure to give a whole screen of black space and put the star where the old roulette would usually go. (It'll feel weird if you don't.) The only exception is for Secret Stars (to differentiate them) and any level where the Secret Star is hidden beyond the normal Star. (Like in Chocolate Island 3 or Cheese Bridge from SMW.)
* If you have horizontal warp pipes, don't put the warp on center or it'll look weird when you enter. Always put the warp on the floor. Also, make sure any such pipes have a floor or block in front of them you can stand on, even if they're underwater.

The theme of each world is:

1. Standard World #001: SMB1 assets only
2. Acqualand: Water
3. Cavey, Cavey Cave: Cave
4. Forest of Adventure: Forest
5. Obligatory Ice Level: Ice/Snow
6. Mt. Grep: Mountain/Sky
7. Brontocorp Inc. & Co: Structures/Metal
8. Hellfire By Night: Nighttime/Lava
Bowser's Castle (each player may submit a small castle area)
9. Secret (anything goes)

Assorted Creations / Warp
« on: October 31, 2010, 09:40:32 AM »
Warp is a game for two or more players. It uses a card deck and some d10s. Cards are played face up on the table.

The players drive spaceships in Warp Space. Warp Space is composed of a series of numbered locations that the players can warp between using their Warp Drives (the cards).

All players start at point 0, draw five cards to determine their warp engine geometry, and roll 3 dice to determine their next destination. Each turn, a player chooses one of their cards (it is not removed from them) to alter their number (x+1 when a player is at point 0 goes to point 1, for example)

All players reveal their moves at the same time each turn. A player may additionally bet a number of their engine cards when doing so: if two players end up in the same warp point this turn, each player loses an engine card, then the player that bet most cards gets them all. Otherwise, bet and lost cards are lost.

Some cards are:
* x+1
* x-1
* 2x
* 2x+1
* 2x-1
* 3x
* 3x+1
* 3x-1
* x/2 (only if even)
* (x+1)/2 (only if odd)
* x²
* x(x-1)

Team Fortress 2 / This is Halloween
« on: October 28, 2010, 04:02:41 AM »
A quick primer if anyone cares:

* Scarechievements can be acquired again, and so you can get the old paper mask by collecting 20 pumpkins from dead players.
* A gift will appear at a random place in Mann Manor at times. This gift contains one of the nine new paper bags. (achievement 1)
* Craft all nine bags together to get the Saxton Hale bag. (achievement 2)
* The Horseless Headless Horseman appears on Mann Manor. It's a boss monster (like Saxton Hale in the VS mod) with 3000+ HP who "tags" a person and chases them until they're dead.
* Kill the Horseman to get an achievement and the pumpkin hat. (achievement 3)
* If you melee kill the horseman or at least assist on meleeing it to death, you receive a Unusual Haunted Metal Scrap (achievement 4). You can only get one.
* Refined Metal x4 + Haunted Metal Scrap = Halloween 2010 hat.
* Refined Metal x2 + Scotsman's Skullcuter + Haunted Metal Scrap = Unusual Horseless Headless Horsemann's Headtaker, which is an Eyelander reskin.
* Unusual Horseless Headless Horsemann's Headtaker + Refined Metal x2 = Halloween 2010 hat.

So, if you're a packrat, you should try to get the following items until November 8:
* 1 Haunted Metal Scrap
* 9 Class Bags
* Saxton Hale Bag (made from 9 more class bags or traded)

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