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Topics - Beat Bandit

Pages: [1] 2
Online Hookers / Let's Play... Together
« on: August 27, 2013, 03:17:25 AM »
There are a lot of different threads about playin' gaymes without much activity, and I'm responsible for most of them. So consider this a catch-all for that.

Castle Crashers insane mode is not something I look forward to soloing, anyone else have interest?

Online Hookers / Yo Dawg, Play PSO2!
« on: June 01, 2013, 02:38:23 PM »
For people who may or may not be Brentai who want to play PSO2:

Go here. page translation can get you through 90% of the process without issue but there's also this guide on how to do it.

You'll need to put in Japanese captchas at least once so having Hiragana characters on hand will help.

After you finish patching, run the game once then use the main files for this English patch (not the large version).

Smiler, Patito, Nodal and Simon the Digger all don't ever play with me on Ship 2, which seems to have a large English speaking population.

Online Hookers / Age of Wushu
« on: February 02, 2013, 10:34:27 AM »

LP Hell / FTL (Not Fat Thighed Ladies, Mongrel)
« on: December 29, 2012, 06:39:22 PM »
"The smell of fat chicks put my spine out of place" might just be one of the ballsiest lines in any song ever.


<beatbandito> Who wants to be a part of the Vic Viper's maiden voyage crew?
<beatbandito> And most likely be killed / replaced by rock people?
<R^2> Beato Bandito, only if you LP it in a thread proper-like


and then these two said stuff, also.

<patito> last place you can
<myew> You have a good place in a can.

And so it was decreed!
Easy mode because this is a blind play and I would like it to last more than two jumps.

"Princess is kidnapped - You must save princess"

My one objective is very clearly to search everything, game. Is this some kind of test?

Things are going wonderfully so far. I have no idea what to do with drone parts yet, but if I gather more maybe they combine to form voldrone.

At this point I realize I haven't taken any shots of the map. Dunno' if sector layouts change for each new game or just events. Regardless, that wall of danger is certainly new.

Could be worse.

See? Told you.

Taking out their weapons first can't be the world's worst idea.

And then oxygen to suffocate them, right?

Okay apparently not. Damnit Patito now isn't the time for your break.

I fall back on the time tested plan of shooting them until they die then use their stuff to give me new stuff.

That... doesn't seem good.

Giant spiders, 'eh?


Real Life / Guess We've Got Brain Problems
« on: September 20, 2012, 10:10:55 AM »
Turns out I wasn't walking into walls because I was an idiot, only because I had a bunch of different infections dumping fluids in my ears!

(NOTE: This thread's split from Good Times. - T)

Real Life / I Wanna Be The Army
« on: August 27, 2012, 07:01:41 PM »
Okay more like the marines. They get the better close combat training and seem to be at least a bit less likely to be canon fodder. The thing is, this seems like one of those decisions that can never not be made rashly no matter how much you think about it. I also think I've basically already completely decided but still need to make some words about it to make sure I'm not totally delusional.

It's not that I'm secretly super patriotic or a warmonger or anything like that. I've had a ton of different jobs almost all in different fields covering all sorts of different activities and it's recently come to my attention that I could not give less than a shit about the skills I would have to master and work I would have to perform for basically any of them. Unfortunately 'social and economic pariah' isn't the most consistent career and anything else requires like, commitment and stuff. I can't stand in a store, sit behind a computer, fix an air conditioner, sell drugs, wash dishes, drive things, talk to people, care for animals or build / destroy or move various inanimate objects around and really but my heart and soul into it. It is all just invariably about making enough money to continue trying to enjoy myself when not working. That never really ends up working out anyhow.

I am totally okay with being paid to receive training in totally actually relevant life skills. Those being not dying and helping others not die. The world is a really terrible place and I don't want to live on this planet anymore. Fuck this gay earth. All that stuff. Unfortunately since space rocket technology will only let me escape the atmosphere for a little while before horrible death or reentry my choices are a bit limited. Instead of staying somewhere that seems to be actively trying to fuck itself into oblivion maybe I could do something better.

I spend most of my time interacting with people in some kind of competitive fashion. The only real moments of focus and clarity are preparing for or the moment of facing off against others. I'm also that kind of asshole who romanticizes the post-apocalyptic scenario because I think I'd be pretty okay comparatively if I survive the initial cataclysm. So anyway, this is really the chance to test it. Spend a few years of my life trying to be great at survival and either walk away a success or don't walk away a failure.

This is where we get into the hot and heavy delusion. Career paths are not something I've ever been able to see. At most a position lead to the promise of a slightly different position with a little more money. AKA: not things I care about. Where as if I did actually find enough success as a soldier to keep going with it past a first few bullets that is some shit you can actually make a difference with. There is never not some kind of atrocity happening somewhere in the world, and all the people suffering need help. Not just a seven samurai grandeur fighting off an army of bandits, but real help. The basics of helping get supplies or aid of some sort is pretty realistic goal and having more training than the people that don't want those things to happen seems like a good plan.

Gaming Discussion / The Secret World
« on: August 11, 2012, 11:36:09 AM »
This is, as it turns out, fun.
I do have a tendency to like games way too much when novelty is still about, so I'll stick to the two strongest aspects of the game.

The leveling is really cool. There's enough depth that there are pretty obviously more "right" choices than others, but it doesn't seem like anything stands out as OP or useless. Enemies also stay pretty simple, so you could seemingly make it through the game even with the most basic options if you dig yourself a hole of bad choices.

There are three of each ranged and melee weapons and magics. Each of these has an offensive and defensive tree. You can equip any combination of two of these skillsets, and leveling is basically a job system. Unlock active and passive abilities and equip any seven of each at any time. So right now I'm mainly claws / blood magic, but also have a blade weapon passive for added life steal.

The missions are the other strength. There are the main story missions "major" which can develop and let you do other missions and basic side. Side is generally collection of some sort, and so far has always been open world items. The other two can be seemingly any kind of mission, but most importantly, there has yet to be a single "kill X Ys" mission. Nor anything even close to it. There was technically one to test out newly developed mines, but running down the street until you have a zombie train then dropping them all and watching the fireworks show behind you should not count for a second.

On top of that, there are a few creative ones. This could just come off as annoying if you want to play the game, but a lot require you to look around, do research, or hope people keep on top of wiki resources for the game.

The mission where you need to find the secret control panel at the church, the code to which you're told is "Sunday's song" and eventually realize "oh hey there's a hymn list hanging up here I'm dumb" was pretty cool. There's also an in-game browser for looking things up. That seemed really stupid to me until the mission where I need the password to a guy's computer. As one might expect his corpse is nearby, but instead of finding a piece of paper where he wrote "can't forget new password is bananacock" you just find his I.D. badge. With his email address. Which leads to his "about" page on the address' host site and gives the answer.

Forum Games / Moral Ambiguity (Idea Thread)
« on: April 07, 2012, 07:05:45 AM »

Prophet - Has heard the will of the gods and wants to lead the village to great prosperity and joy. Can not be targeted by any powers or lynching. Each night may choose to scry a target to reveal their alignment, but can't communicate the following day.

False Prophet - Bitter to not have been chosen, his only will is to destroy the work of the gods. Same as prophet but instead of scrying can convert a villager every other night.

Villager - Standard innocent. Wins if the prophet wins.

Converted Villager - Wins if the false prophet wins.

Each day plays out as any normal wolf game. Villagers choose who they think is a blasphemer and hang 'em. Any villager still properly worshiping the gods will surely be have their soul saved anyway, so no real loss.

At any point during any day villagers may instead choose to rally around a priest and expel the heathens. If either priest gains more than half of the current total villagers, the game is over.

I was tossing a bunch of ideas in my head after the VvW talk and this is the heavily edited version of what seemed the coolest and easiest to run. Looking over the final product it's a lot more like the current Kazz game then I wanted it to but OH WELL. Opinions?

Gaming Discussion / Kingdoms of Amalur
« on: February 07, 2012, 03:33:54 PM »
So I'm exactly one hour through this game right now (also the length of the tutorial area though not technically the tutorial) and these are my thoughts:

The camera, controls, and menu UI are horrible. Like seriously. You can't rebind anything to mouse buttons, and the two main functions already bound to the mouse can't be changed to anything else. Everything on the menus is mouse driven, but sometimes the new tab wont respond to the cursor, or clicking, but then you double click and now you're three menus deep.

The camera feels like a drunk skier is tied to your ass. You can move the angle up or down to set angles (they're basically all bad) but there's no zoom, yet it will seemingly randomly be up your butt sometimes and corners like, well the first sentence of this paragraph. If you want to look around the battlefield while fighting I hope you have a third hand or a well trained dick, because you'll need WASD, the mouse AND arrow keys all at once to do it. Oh and arrows / spells seem to fire "straight where you're facing" with no reticle AND YOUR CAMERA LOCKS INTO PLACE WHILE YOU DRAW.

Okay, I decided to get the bad stuff out of the way first because I'm gonna' over exaggerate everything and have been fanboying way too hard on new releases lately. There's good stuff, too.

Combat is fun. Legitimately fun. Despite the bow aiming I'm seriously loved all the weapons so far. My three sneak attacks with the basic daggers all used different animations, sneaking itself seemed at least different from the way games normally do it, and sword fighting with combos, finishing hits, dodging, blocking and mixing attack types is insane. The daggers and sword felt pretty similar, as I expect most weapons will, but the seamless switching between them and magic to keep combos going is what's going to keep it interesting.

The story seems great too. The setting is original but not out there, and all the characters so far have at least been likable. Everything from the little comments made by the guy that leads you around to the background event of a woman running from the enemy, turning to see how close he is, stumbling and having him jump at the opportunity to cut her down seemed to have more thought in it than you expect. Speaking of small stuff, so far the first book (not note) I've found was a diary that, when interacted with, is automatically open to the last page and you need to turn back to the beginning.

So far nothing to make me regret spending money on a game I hadn't heard of before a month ago, nor anything that's made me decide it must be the greatest thing ever produced, but honestly that just encourages me that everything happening is just right.

[spoiler]oh and there's a gnome that escapes a group of enemies by running through them while holding a knife up to kneecap as many as he can[/spoiler]

Online Hookers / Questing Forever
« on: January 18, 2012, 06:49:28 AM »
So EQII is F2P now. I know enough people have mentioned it / been playing it that I'm surprised there's no thread going yet.

So far it feels a lot different from what I remember, but most of that is probably just due to standard free player lock-outs. Seems like a one time five dollar throw-down gets you most of the basic content, then you can either go for a standard subscription or just buy individual class / race / area / item unlocks if you don't want everything.

I'm currently Pilcrow (Ampersand, Ellipsis, Asterisk and Tilde were all taken) on Nagafen, the only PVP server.

Online Hookers / Old Republic
« on: December 30, 2011, 09:13:36 PM »

best game 2011

Media / Slowly Retrieve Pineapple from ****
« on: August 07, 2011, 07:42:27 AM »

Why give Prequel its own thread? Because Kaz kept their end of the deal

Media / Straight Shlong-Suckin' Songs
« on: July 19, 2011, 07:07:26 AM »
C418's new hotness is just that.

« on: May 31, 2011, 08:00:38 PM »
Exactly one year ago today, Adrien Brody started his amazing quest across the universe.


As you all know we now celebrate this event by annually presenting him with the award of Best Brody.


Happy Broday, one and all.

Assorted Creations / Them Tubes
« on: May 05, 2011, 01:54:25 PM »
I made a Youtube page for uploading quotes and what-not that I feel need to be readily available for snappy comebacks.

and this


people should suggest things to upload

Real Life / Everyday Ironies
« on: November 13, 2010, 12:21:46 PM »
Saw a group that looked like they had never bathed or worked their bodies leaving Bath & Body Works.

World's Most Scientific Institute / Best Snack Item
« on: July 13, 2010, 03:49:02 PM »
If you losers really need it I guess there can be more options added

Online Hookers / Transformice
« on: June 23, 2010, 09:06:10 AM »
Okay, we've been talking about it in Freeloader for a while now. I love this game, it's amazing.

First off, click here to play

Once the sacrifices have been made and the server lets you connect, type /friend and these names:


(You can't friend offline people)

Type /room 59 where I'll probably be.

Okay, now some stuff about the game.

As a mouse:
-  There's idle death. Move a little bit at the start of every map.

- Cheese / exit are the only two things you should go towards. There's no reason to move forward if you can't currently make it to either of those without the shaman. It'll get you killed.

- Double jumping can be done by running off the side of a platform and, mid-fall, jumping out of it. Some stages require this to beat them without a shaman.

- Wall jumping can be done, apparently, but pressing away from the wall, against the wall, then up. This will help you get the cheese either first or without the shaman, but is never needed. Kayin is really good at it and no one else.

As a shaman:
- You can only build in a small range around you, except for "spirit" which works anywhere on the map.

- Anchoring is important, it's the main thing you need and new shamans can't do.
  - B button after selecting an item puts a red dot in the middle. This will anchor the plank (only works on planks) by that point only, allowing it to spin still, but not move.
  - C button puts a yellow dot on something. On a plank you can hit C up to three times to change the position of the dot. The yellow dot will connect to other items at that point. Items connected with this don't spin on their own, but provide no actual support, so a B anchored plank is required.
  - N Makes puts a blue dot on the item. The item then starts to spin. Two blue dot planks on each other will push down causing an elevatoresque lift. Generally this is just used to attach anvils to more anvils and make a ragebeast, though.
  - V does something? I've yet to use it, but the help page says it does.

- Things not listed on the help page;
  - Hitting space make an object "invisible". When invisible only other objects interact with that object, not mice / shaman. Only hit space after putting an anchor on the item or adding the anchor may make it physical again.
  - X rotates the item you're about to build. Z probably does in the other direction, haven't tried yet.

- Go to a high enough room that no one will be in and you'll always spawn as a shaman so you can practice anything freely.

I think that sums it up, I'm probably leaving something out. Anyway, play this, post your name for it here, share war stories.

Gaming Discussion / APB: Arrrgh, Pirate Bullions!
« on: June 19, 2010, 03:52:44 PM »
So, Ziiro posted about this in Freeloader a while ago and I finally gave it a play today. It's pretty nifty.

I don't know how fun things are going to be with the pay for play. There's talk of buying hours for playing in the PvP areas even if you pay monthly, which this game is not worth. The other supposed thing is just flat out $10 a month which from what I've seen so far this game could worth pretty easily.

If you're going to play, a few things:

Main server

Character is Beatbandit

If you can't find out how to get graphics options at character creation (I couldn't) then just make a throw-away, and reroll after changing settings. The difference between the default settings and what my computer could handle was a completely different character.

High-Context Discourse / KARMA FIGHT!
« on: May 03, 2010, 05:30:35 PM »

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