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[Norondor]

FUCK, remind me to come back and give you a karma for that

[Friday]

hey Brentai

wanna touch my body? ;)

[Brentai]

template

[Disposable Ninja]

Hey Brentei

Wanna touch MY body?

It's already pre-oiled.

[Cthulhu-chan]

gross, dude.  take a shower.

[Thad]

The Ballad of @Horse_ebooks

It is a spam account. It tweets snippets of semi-promotional text throughout the day and night. Unlike most spam accounts, which trawl for Tweets relevant to their pitch and automatically respond to buzzwords, horse_ebooks doesn’t respond to anyone. Horse_ebooks doesn’t mass-follow, another common spamming technique. (Since new follower notification emails — which contain profile information, including links — users receive aren’t stopped by spam filters, but most of the people followed by horse_ebooks are people who chose to follow it first.) The reason it hasn’t been shut down yet is the same reason it’s so hilariously terrible at its job: It doesn’t bother anyone who doesn’t want to be bothered.

[Defenestration]

Norondor introduced me to that twitter account last month. Checking it is a small continual source of joy in my life.

[Thad]

From: Максимов <reclaimingxa7@[domain that looks like a pronounceable series of consonants and vowels but is not actually a word].ch>
Subject: Our business is to allow you special price reductions

Avoid bothersome arthritis using jolly discounts. Summer brings sunny days and great prices

Find out something new from our med store. Observe great variety of pharmacy preparations at cut rates. Be our client with a big pleasure.

_{You are receiving this newsletter because you subscribed to Objectbird´s e-mail newsletter.
Don't want to receive these emails anymore? You can unsubscribe.}

("Unsubscribe" is a link to a Russian domain containing the word "drugs", and is exactly the same link as the first one)

[Thad]

ISSUES OF FRAUD CRIME AGAINST YOU

This the Federal Bureau Of Investigation (FBI) We are writing in response to our track light monitoring device which we received today in our office about the illegal transactions that you have been involve in for a long time now.

[Thad]

horseecomics.tumblr.com is what it sounds like -- phrases from horse_ebooks turned into comics, Spamusement-style.

[François]

-Hi! I'm calling on behalf of the Royal Bank of Canada to tell you about our identity protection services.
-Uh, yeah, sorry but I'm pretty on the ball with my identity stuff to begin with, and besides that's probably a pay service and I can't afford it.
-You'll be happy to know that we offer a one month free trial-
-And if no one tries to steal my identity during that month, how will I know if your service is any good?
-The service also comes with purchase protection-
-Before I waste more of your time by letting you explain what that is, how much does that even cost?
-Only 8.95$ per month.
-So that's about a hundred dollars per year.
-Yes sir.
-If I subscribe to this service I won't be able to go to the dentist anymore.
-...
-You know what? If someone wants my identity, they can have it.
-Thanks for being a Royal Bank customer, sir.
-Have a nice day!

[Thad]

      
Type of Remuneration: Fixed salary  2500
 
Job Description Responsibilities:
 
This position is available within our SEO team. Your duties will range from editing articles on various topics written by our team of Article Writers to writing the same. You must be able to write in a variety of styles and formats for a variety of audiences. You will be responsible for ensuring that your writing is high quality, creative, and intelligent. Because of this, we are looking for people with a passion for writing, and of course, loyal, long term employees.
 
* Should have previous experience in writing and editing
* Typing speed should be at least 15 wpm
 
What you will need to do: - Apply Here Job
 
We get in touch with you within 5 days from receiving your contact information to discuss the job details with you.
Thank you in advance for your cooperation!



Click to view this email in a browser

If you no longer wish to receive these emails, please reply to this message with "Unsubscribe" in the subject line or simply click on the following link: Unsubscribe
Vdara Hotel and Spa
2600 Harmon Ave
NV, Las Vegas 90028
USA

Read the VerticalResponse marketing policy.
   Non-Profits Email Free with VerticalResponse!

I'm a little tipsy so it took me until "Apply here job" to realize that this was obvious spam and not just run-of-the-mill LinkedIn trawling.

[Thad]

From: MYUPS <mail@ups.com>
Subject: You pig!

You should be stoping ignoring me or i will send this photos to your spouse!!!


Attachment: DCIM.zip

[Büge]

So spammers have gone from cajoling, to trickery, to threats?

[Thad]

That or my UPS man is the jealous type.

[Thad]

From: ( I.M.F ) Head Quarter <imfwbpayment@e-mail.ua>
Reply-To: imfwbprogramusa@e-mail.ua
Subject: RE: Fund Release Approval, ( I.M.F ) Head Quarter/ 07-08-12

(That's so weird.  It says "RE:" but I totally don't remember sending out an E-Mail with that subject line!)

( I.M.F ) Head Quarter
International Monetary Fund,
700 19th Street, N.W.,
Washington, D.C. 20431
REF: UN/FRS-IMFPMT-2012
Tel : (+1) 202 436 9602

Dear Fund Beneficiary,

This is to intimate you of a very important information which will be of a real help to redeem you from all the difficulties you have been experiencing in getting your long over due payment due to excessive demand for money from you by both corrupt Bank officials and Courier Companies after which your fund remain unpaid to you.

I am Robert Boggi, Supervision Director of the International Monetary Fund (IMF). It may interest you to know that reports have reached our office by so many correspondences on the uneasy way which people like you are treated by Various Banks and Courier Companies/Diplomat across Europe to Africa and Asia /London UK and we have decided to put a stop to that and that is why I was appointed to handle your transaction here in the United States.

All Governmental and Non-Governmental prostates, NGOs, Finance Companies, Banks, Security Companies and Courier companies which have been in contact with you of late have been instructed to back off from your transaction and you have been advised NOT to respond to them anymore since the IMF is now directly in charge of your payment working with the Federal Reserve System (FRS) and World Bank for smooth release of your fund in good faith. The amount sum $4.5 Million has been approved for immediate release into your bank account within 72 hours by the above mentioned authorities.

You are hereby advised NOT to remit further payment to any institutions with respect to your transaction as your fund will be transferred to you directly from our source.

I hope this explanation is very clear to you. Any action contrary to this instruction is at your own risk. Respond to this e-mail with immediate effect and we shall give you further details on how your fund will be released.

Furnish this office with the below information.

1,Your full name and address
2,Your telephone number and fax
3,Your Age and occupation

Note: For beneficiary outside the United States, contact our UK Regional Centre for your fund release:

Contact Person: Mark Gilbert
E-mail: IMFregionalagencyuk@e-mail.ua
Tel: (+44) 203 239 4862

Regards,
Robert Boggi,
Supervision Director
International Monetary Fund (IMF)
700 19th Street, N.W.,
Washington, D.C. 20431
Tel : (+1) 202 436 9602

[François]

Holy crap dude, it must be such a relief that all these prostates are backing off!

[Thad]

Non-Governmental Prostate is the name of my band.

[Shinra]

I liked your solo project, Libertarian Seminal Fluid better.

[Thad]

Subject: Prepared in advance of a pair of UGGBOOTS!Only 48 Hours left for 60% Off Plus Free Shippingoa

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Can't view this e-mail? Click here.

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We select the highest quality Twin face sheepskin available which we truly believe is the perfect material. No other material so naturally keeps your feet cool and warm at the same time. Or, for that matter, is able to bring together cozy and cutting edge in a single pair. Once you have experienced this wondrous material, you'll understand why you have to feel it to believe it.

Click here to learn more.




This is a promotional offer from [domain name].com.

This email was sent to [same domain name]@gmail.com. You are currently subscribed to receive our email advertisements. If you no longer wish to receive our email advertisements, click here [there is no link on the words "click here"] and we will remove you from our list. Please allow up to two weeks for removal.

If you can't see the images in this message, click here.  [This "click here" is just a link to the same URL as above.]

This message comes from an unattended mailbox. Please do not "Reply" to this message. Click here to opt out. [This "click here" is another link to the same URL as above.] Click here to contact customer service.  [And this "click here" is, once again, just plain text that does absolutely nothing if you click on it.] Please note that product prices and availability are subject to change. Some offers are limited. See site for details and expiration dates. Prices and availability were accurate at the time this message was sent; however, they may differ from those you see when you visit the site.

Man, I TOTALLY want to buy a product called UGGBOOTS.