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Poll

PUPPY

1. INFINITE LIVES MOTHERFUCKER
- 3 (42.9%)
2. It's too dark to do anything. You are likely to be eaten by a grue.
- 2 (28.6%)
3. Dennis
- 2 (28.6%)

Total Members Voted: 7


Pages: 1 2 3 [4] 5 6 7 8 9 10

Author Topic: The Adventures of CPE (The Cutest Puppy EVER)  (Read 15704 times)

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Guild

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Re: The Adventures of CPE (The Cutest Puppy EVER)
« Reply #61 on: June 10, 2009, 01:14:14 PM »

Why is that funny?

I'm not asking like, "OMG LOL WHY IS THAT SO FUNNY?!"

I'm asking why those people are laughing like this guy invented comedy.

Edit: A minute of research popped up with this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VVp8UGjECt4

which was actually funny.
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Friday

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Re: The Adventures of CPE (The Cutest Puppy EVER)
« Reply #62 on: June 10, 2009, 08:54:24 PM »

2. o. m. f. g. CAN CHICKENS FLY CAN I RIDE THE CHICKEN

You stare at the chicken, mouth agape.

The chicken clucks nervously.

"Puppy?" says the Fox, gently.

You pounce. The Chicken runs, you run, the Fox runs, the grain even rolls a little bit.

With a thump you land face first onto the chicken's back. Startled, the chicken begins to pick up speed. Flapping its wings, it begins to rise into the air, with you aboard.

"Cluck cluck cluck puppy what are you cluck cluck cluck!"

You rise higher and higher into the air, leaving a trail of feathers that float gently in the breeze.

Barking excitedly, you steer your chicken toward a waterfall, pulling up just before impact, feeling the tiny drops of moisture splatter against your face.

"Puppy! Use caution! Cluck!"

You ascend into the sky in a lazy circle. Far below you now, the Fox and the Grain look upward, astonished.

"Now I've seen everything," the Fox mutters.

"I'm just still surprised I can talk," says the Grain.

Meanwhile, you soar above the snowy hill. The boy reaches to the ground and picks up a snowball, which he aims carefully and then hurls upward at you. Despite the distance, it barely misses, shooting past you, upwards into the sky, losing no speed.

Above you, you can see what seems to be a dock in the clouds. Hints of structures made from cloud, tall towers, shimmering castles.

Beneath you, the boy bends once more, impossibly fast, hurling what seems to be hundreds of snowball up at you, spread out like buckshot, closing fast.

*************************************

1. CLOUDS ARE MADE OF COOL WHIP

2. Dive bomb the boy! Your revenge is at hand!

3. DO A BARREL ROLL
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Cthulhu-chan

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Re: The Adventures of CPE (The Cutest Puppy EVER)
« Reply #63 on: June 10, 2009, 09:00:20 PM »

Quote from:  Friday poll thingy
HWHIP
   :oic:

Also REVENGE!
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Brentai

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Re: The Adventures of CPE (The Cutest Puppy EVER)
« Reply #64 on: June 10, 2009, 09:05:21 PM »

There is never a time when doing a barrel roll is not the best option.
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Brentai

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Re: The Adventures of CPE (The Cutest Puppy EVER)
« Reply #65 on: June 10, 2009, 09:05:38 PM »

As your mother found out last night.
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Kayma

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Re: The Adventures of CPE (The Cutest Puppy EVER)
« Reply #66 on: June 10, 2009, 09:17:24 PM »

Brentai is, motherly accusations aside, entirely correct.

BARREL ROLL.
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Zaratustra

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Re: The Adventures of CPE (The Cutest Puppy EVER)
« Reply #67 on: June 10, 2009, 10:19:33 PM »

PRESS Z OR R TWICE

SCD

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Re: The Adventures of CPE (The Cutest Puppy EVER)
« Reply #68 on: June 10, 2009, 10:28:10 PM »

Again,

 :wuv:

Thanks Friday for this pleasant happy diversion.
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Friday

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Re: The Adventures of CPE (The Cutest Puppy EVER)
« Reply #69 on: June 11, 2009, 12:55:54 AM »

3. DO A BARREL ROLL

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wIkJvY96i8w

"Cluck Z cluck R cluck!"

Pressing Z twice quickly, you

DO A BARREL ROLL

A Barrel Roll?

The snowballs are repelled by the awesome force of your feathery BARREL ROLL and fly off in random directions, a significant portion of them reflected back toward the boy.

Mouth hanging open, the boy is buried under his own projectiles, and knocked off the top of the hill. His mittens are blown off his hands. He tumbles down the slope, landing in a snowdrift at the bottom, then vanishes.

"Cluck! Truly your wisdom and courage have prevailed once again, Puppy!"

"I like cars and chasing," you say.

The chicken clucks softly. "I fear, cluck, that I have not the strength to carry you much longer, cluck. We should cluck set down so I cluck can rest. The hilltop cluck seems a safe place."

"I SEE THAT BOYS MITTENS THEY ARE ON TOP OF THE HILL THEY WILL BE MINE I WILL SHRED THEM AND LOVE THEM AND SLEEP ON THEM," you say.

"To the hilltop, then, cluck?" asks the chicken.

"Yes!" you say enthusiastically. "We shall claim the mittens for all of puppykind!"

"Can't let you do that, Puppy," says the Rabbit, riding on the back of another chicken directly behind you.

"They've got cluck missile lock!" says the chicken, alarms beeping.

************************************

1. Try a somersault!

2. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V8rZWw9HE7o

3. EMERGENCY EJECT
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Guild

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Cthulhu-chan

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Re: The Adventures of CPE (The Cutest Puppy EVER)
« Reply #71 on: June 11, 2009, 02:27:10 AM »

I DON'T KNOW WHAT 2 MEANS BUT SURELY THE EIGHTIES WOULDN'T LEAD ME ASTRAY?!
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Kayma

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Re: The Adventures of CPE (The Cutest Puppy EVER)
« Reply #72 on: June 11, 2009, 08:23:39 AM »

There's nothing I don't like about this story.
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Brentai

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Re: The Adventures of CPE (The Cutest Puppy EVER)
« Reply #73 on: June 11, 2009, 10:29:23 AM »

ohshi

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GI6vIfxkEYM

Somersault pretty much always works on these fuckers.  The hardest part is convincing them to get behind you.
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Defenestration

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Re: The Adventures of CPE (The Cutest Puppy EVER)
« Reply #74 on: June 11, 2009, 02:49:06 PM »

CALL ME MAVERICK AND PUNCH IN 2
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Una salus victis nullam sperare salutem

Friday

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Re: The Adventures of CPE (The Cutest Puppy EVER)
« Reply #75 on: June 11, 2009, 03:30:16 PM »

2. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V8rZWw9HE7o

SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

ZOOOOOOOOOM

WHOOOOOOOOOSHHHHHHH

RATatatatatatata

"Where is he, I don't --"

"He's right on your damn six!"

FPPPPPPPPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFssssssssshhh

"Fox 1!"

PFEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWW

Ratatatatatatata

Beep beep beep beep beep beep beep

"We're leaking fuel! We're hit! Mayday mayday!"

FWOOOOOOOOOMMMM

SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssh

Ratatatatatata

sheeeeeeeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiishhhh

ZZZZZZZZSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHH ratatatatatata FWOOOOOOOOM "WHERE IS HE?! I CAN'T SEE ANYTHING!!!"
"I've got two more bogeys, coming in hot!"

SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAaaaaaaaaaa

"I've got tone! Fox 2!"

FWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSHHHH BLAAAAAAAAAAASAHM

Beep beep beep beep beep beep

FWOOOOOOOOOSHM

"Hit the brakes! He'll fly right by!"

sssssssssssssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeemmcccckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

FORSHUUUUUUUUUM

"You're good," says the Rabbit, directly on your six, missiles locked once more.

"But I'm better."

****************************************************

"Puppy! What cluck are we going cluck to do!?"

Eyes narrowed, you set your mouth in a determined scowl.

"The only thing we can do," you reply.

****************************************************

The Rabbit's sidewinders close.

"It's curtains for you, PUPPY!" he scream triumphantly in your ear.

You spin 180 degrees in mid-air. The Rabbit's eyes widen in shock at your impossible maneuver.

"It's no use! Those missiles are going to impact!" he screams.

The missiles are mere meters away. They streak toward you like red hot needles tearing through the sky.

You confess your love for Kenny Loggins.

"NO! NOT KENNY LOGGINS!" the Rabbit screams abysmally.

Against such a love, missiles are useless. They turn away and explode harmlessly.

The Rabbit cannot withstand such a love. His head explodes, followed by his chicken bursting into a pile of feathers that float gently down to earth.

You and your chicken land atop the hill.

As you dismount, the chicken glances over at you.

"You can be my wingman anytime, cluck," it says.

"I really do love that man so much," you remark.

The chicken nods. "Until we meet again, brave Puppy. Farewell."

And with that, the chicken rockets away into the sky. You watch, a single tear in your eye.

You turn to the mittens which lay atop the snow, red against the white.

"Omfg you are made of wool," you say.

Several minutes pass of you playing with the mittens until they are pretty much completely shredded and worn down. You pant heavily, then settle down for a short nap.

There is a strange rumbling. You raise one ear.

CRACK

Rainbow's head pokes out of the hill nearby.

"Puppy! What are you doing! You're not paying attention to the trials at all! You'll never escape this place if you just play around in your own subconscious!"

*************************************

1. "Oh right sorry, what were the trials again? Oh hey look at fish! Wait you're the fish. Hey look a snowflake!"

2. Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwnnnnnnzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

3. OH MY GOD THE RABBIT SURVIVED SOMEHOW I CAN SEE HIM OVER BY THOSE WOODS I WILL FIND HIM I WILL FIND THE RABBIT aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA


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Doom

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Re: The Adventures of CPE (The Cutest Puppy EVER)
« Reply #76 on: June 11, 2009, 03:37:01 PM »

3 D:
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Guild

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Re: The Adventures of CPE (The Cutest Puppy EVER)
« Reply #77 on: June 11, 2009, 03:37:58 PM »

Oh that rabbit is going DOWN.
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Kayma

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Re: The Adventures of CPE (The Cutest Puppy EVER)
« Reply #78 on: June 11, 2009, 03:47:25 PM »

 :8D:
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Disposable Ninja

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Re: The Adventures of CPE (The Cutest Puppy EVER)
« Reply #79 on: June 11, 2009, 04:32:44 PM »

death to bunny
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