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Author Topic: how i drank coffee  (Read 3496 times)

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Defenestration

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how i drank coffee
« on: December 05, 2009, 10:32:52 PM »

So, I'm currently visiting my aunt in Seattle. And I have a revelation. I am in Seattle, and I have not had a cup of coffee. This seems like sacriledge. But understandable, since I don't think I've ever had a cup of actual coffee in my life. My experience with coffee is making a face when I get a nasty coffee flavored candy.

So, where should I start?
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Kazz

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Re: how i drank coffee
« Reply #1 on: December 05, 2009, 10:35:15 PM »

I could never stand the taste of coffee, or anything coffee-flavored.  I wish I did, honestly; I like hot beverages and I like caffeine.  I do enjoy tea, but it's not actually all that easy to get good tea in the states unless you brew it yourself.
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Doom

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Re: how i drank coffee
« Reply #2 on: December 05, 2009, 10:36:11 PM »

Learn to make the coffee.

Have sugar and milk available.

Add one spoonful of sugar. Taste the coffee.

If  ::(:, add some milk and mix it until a pleasing light-brown. Taste the coffee.

If  ::(:, add a second spoonful of sugar. Do not add any more spoonfuls no matter what yet.

If  ::(:, add more milk or you made the coffee wrong.

You are basically just looking for a simple basis to make the coffee pleasant to drink because starting with black coffee will kill you.

Welcome to the Wonderful World of Coffee. Just as there are many flavors, there are many coffees. Heating is also important, as coffee is dramatically different even lukewarm.
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Classic

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Re: how i drank coffee
« Reply #3 on: December 05, 2009, 10:36:24 PM »

Do you like bitter things? No? Then start with coffee that does not at all taste like coffee.

Apply equal parts milk of at least 2% milkfat and a teaspoon of sugar for every four oz. of beverage. More to taste. Get the GIRLIEST drink you can find, and work your way up to the hard stuff.

EDIT:

If it's particularly strong coffee (espresso) consider nuking your milk in preparation. Condensed milkfat on the top of your coffee is an exciting treat.

I get good results nuking 4oz. 2% for 66 seconds in my microwave. It does occasionally boil up however, so be careful. Ideally, milk is heated on a proper stove, but... eh.
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Kazz

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Re: how i drank coffee
« Reply #4 on: December 05, 2009, 10:49:35 PM »

Do you like bitter things?

Welllll... beer is usually bitter, and I love beer.
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yyler

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Re: how i drank coffee
« Reply #5 on: December 05, 2009, 10:52:03 PM »

Here are some Coffee Tips

Do not use a "coffee maker" because they do not make coffee. They do something else and I don't quite know what that is. You want a press. French Press, AeroPress, other press: doesn't really matter. Always press your coffee.

Make sure you are using the correct temperature water. It should be just under boiling for most beans. After grinding, you want a fine grain, but not a powder, unless you are making Turkish Coffee, which you are not. Not yet.

Do not leave the water in contact with the grounds for too long. Your coffee should come out dark brown--not black, like people say--and oily. Oily is good, you want that.

With regards to beans, lighter roasts are more caffeinated than darker roasts.

Milk and sugar are fine to use--I use it--and do not let coffee faggots tell you otherwise. Every bean has a distinctive flavor, though, so you should try new cups of properly prepared coffee before adding anything to them. There are a few kinds of coffee I can drink straight, and they are mostly very expensive Hawaiian brands. Even so, I like coffee with sugar and milk more. You can use honey rather than sugar, too.

Unless you're Hawaiian you can't buy local grown coffee, so try to make sure you can at least get organically grown free-trade beans.
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yyler

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Re: how i drank coffee
« Reply #6 on: December 05, 2009, 10:54:04 PM »

And dang if you're in Seattle go to the first Starbucks and give everyone a high five or something

Starbucks coffee is not a bad quality for the price and of late they are pretty environmentally responsible so there's no good reason to not support them imo
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Defenestration

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Re: how i drank coffee
« Reply #7 on: December 05, 2009, 10:58:12 PM »

I was led to believe from various sources over the years that Starbucks has bad coffee. Something about burnt beans. But yes, it probably will be the first place I go, being the closest
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yyler

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Re: how i drank coffee
« Reply #8 on: December 05, 2009, 10:59:50 PM »

I don't think they burn their beans anymore. I'd heard of that, but once they switched to free-trade it seemed better. Could be psychological, but I haven't heard anything about it in years, so.
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Detonator

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Re: how i drank coffee
« Reply #9 on: December 05, 2009, 11:12:07 PM »

Just go to any coffee shop.  Don't expect your first cup to be the most amazing thing ever.  It's just a drink, and it'll take a while to acquire a taste for it.  Just go around and try everything, even if you don't love it at first.  The worst thing that will happen is that you'll be set back a few dollars, so why not?
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Rico

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Re: how i drank coffee
« Reply #10 on: December 05, 2009, 11:14:08 PM »

Starbucks coffee is not bad.  The do have the coffee-equivalent of "well-done" beans, but they're not burnt.  The importance of Starbucks is that, if you are some sort of sorry bastard who lives in a region (or are visiting) without a known good local coffeehouse, you know exactly what you will get at Starbucks and it will probably be better than Midwest Bob's Strip Latte Drivethru.
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Miss Cat Ears

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Re: how i drank coffee
« Reply #11 on: December 05, 2009, 11:56:43 PM »

I don't like coffee but I do like flavored coffee, i.e. coffee that tastes like not coffee.  They have flavored syrups for this.

Do people who like regular and/or black coffee really like it or is it an acquired taste?  I wonder the same thing about beer.
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Kazz

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Re: how i drank coffee
« Reply #12 on: December 05, 2009, 11:57:56 PM »

I didn't realize those were mutually exclusive.

Also, I only drink beer to fit in.
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Miss Cat Ears

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Re: how i drank coffee
« Reply #13 on: December 06, 2009, 12:01:39 AM »

They may not be, I'm just really ignorant on coffee.
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Brentai

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Re: how i drank coffee
« Reply #14 on: December 06, 2009, 12:59:02 AM »

I basically learned to drink coffee the same way I learned to drink beer: by necessity more or less.  Force yourself to it if you have to and eventually you'll probably figure out what you need to do to make it palatable for you (blast it with cream but no sugar and avoid anything you can shine a light through, respectively).

"Being in Seattle" seems like a terrible reason to start drinking coffee, as tea is a lot damn better for you and is probably more trendy at this point anyway.  But if you feel like you have to, just start with the cheapest black shit you can find and take it with a bunch of unhealthy stuff thrown in it, then adjust to your particular taste.  I wouldn't spend too much money on the coffee itself because the most expensive ones are generally engineered to taste good to people who actually like the taste of coffee in the first place.  So Starbucks, for example, tends to taste suspiciously like there's dirt in it to non-aficionados, because that texture's what makes it good coffee to everyone else.  :shrug:
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JDigital

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Re: how i drank coffee
« Reply #15 on: December 06, 2009, 04:05:39 AM »

Drink tea instead.
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Cthulhu-chan

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Re: how i drank coffee
« Reply #16 on: December 06, 2009, 04:08:31 AM »

So Starbucks, for example, tends to taste suspiciously like there's dirt in it to non-aficionados, because that texture's what makes it good coffee to everyone else.  :shrug:
I never noticed this, but then I tend to gay up my coffee whenever I actually go to a place like Starbucks.  Otherwise, a cuppa joe, two sugar, one half-n-half, and I'm happy.
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Büge

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Re: how i drank coffee
« Reply #17 on: December 06, 2009, 06:45:41 AM »

Coffee is like vanilla extract. It's nice to smell, but it tastes like hatred.
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Cthulhu-chan

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Re: how i drank coffee
« Reply #18 on: December 06, 2009, 07:22:35 AM »

I would agree that coffee definitely smells better than it tastes, undoctored.

Turkish coffee is ambrosia, though.
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Norondor

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Re: how i drank coffee
« Reply #19 on: December 06, 2009, 07:25:24 AM »

you need to be a meta-human to drink the stuff, though
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