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Author Topic: What the fuck?  (Read 207818 times)

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Cannon

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Re: What the fuck?
« Reply #80 on: April 30, 2008, 08:42:25 PM »

Quote
Even some inmates treat him like a celebrity. As the sheriff stands in a group of female prisoners, one presents a legal pad.

"You want an autograph? What you got here? What's your name?" he asks.

"Jane, don't be no one's bitch! I'm sure this will make you the envy of all the people you wish you could mail and inform. Have an awesome summer!

"- Joe "McSafe Secureington" Arpaio <3 :)"

Quote
On another occasion, a male prisoner, a look of anger on his face, tries to talk to the sheriff, who quickly interrupts:

"You have been convicted. You're doing your time. Do your time and shut your mouth and do what you have to do."

"I mean... Don't you have a game of Kaboom! to star in or something?"
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Thad

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Re: What the fuck?
« Reply #81 on: May 01, 2008, 12:29:48 AM »

Thad must be so proud

Er, that article is dated July 1999, FYI.

Not that anything's changed, mind, except that he somehow keeps getting reelected every two years.
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Royal☭

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Re: What the fuck?
« Reply #82 on: May 01, 2008, 04:42:23 AM »

Yeah.  I looked up his Wiki article, and things only seem to have gotten worse, incredibly.

Cthulhu-chan

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Re: What the fuck?
« Reply #83 on: May 03, 2008, 01:55:30 AM »

If I recall correctly, his approval rating has dropped significantly, just not enough.  The New Times has been fighting the good fight (if only to protect themselves), but the man has too many connections and is really entrenched.
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Thad

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Re: What the fuck?
« Reply #84 on: May 03, 2008, 01:29:39 PM »

That's it in a nutshell.  (Though really, the New Times only needs to protect itself BECAUSE it's been fighting the good fight.)  He'll be reelected in November in a walk, but I think County Attorney Thomas might go down for the shit they pulled last year.

Quick recap: New Times goes after Arpaio.  In doing so, they reveal some of his sketchy real estate dealings, and in doing so, they publish his home address.  It turns out there's an arcane statute prohibiting the online publication of law enforcement officials' addresses, so Thomas appoints a special prosecutor over it.  Despite the fact that Arpaio's home address is published on the county website.

The special prosecutor then proceeds to demand the New Times reveal all the data it has on everyone who has accessed its website for the last several years.  New Times takes this to press; its publishers are immediately arrested but, as you may expect, this does not go over well with anyone anywhere and they are promptly released, the charges are dropped, and the prosecutor resigns.

That's the gist, but there's more on the Sheriff Joe: Target Practice page.
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Kazz

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Re: What the fuck?
« Reply #85 on: May 04, 2008, 06:10:05 AM »

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Arc

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Re: What the fuck?
« Reply #86 on: May 04, 2008, 07:27:02 AM »

... Splattered all over my $45 soft drink!
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Mongrel

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Re: What the fuck?
« Reply #87 on: May 04, 2008, 07:53:26 PM »

Ahhhh... la plus ša change...
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Kazz

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Re: What the fuck?
« Reply #88 on: May 05, 2008, 12:27:47 AM »

The favorite to win the Kentucky Derby was a horse named Big Brown.  Hillary Clinton roots for the only filly in the race, Eight Belles.  Big Brown wins.  Eight Belles comes in second, but breaks both ankles, and is euthanized on the track.

You can't make this shit up.
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James Edward Smith

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Re: What the fuck?
« Reply #89 on: May 05, 2008, 07:21:17 AM »

I love how Big Brown was a relatively inexperienced horse too.
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Brentai

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Re: What the fuck?
« Reply #90 on: May 05, 2008, 09:19:13 AM »

This article... it just ascends the boundaries of perfection.

On the left:

Quote
THE only filly in the legendary US Kentucky Derby, which Hillary Clinton urged her supporters to put their money on, broke both its ankles and was destroyed! on the track after the race ended.

Image on the right:

Quote
Hillary Clinton enjoys a stop at a Dairy Queen in Indiana, two days before polling day

Yeah.
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Norondor

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Re: What the fuck?
« Reply #91 on: May 05, 2008, 09:53:39 AM »

Basically the closest thing we're getting to a literal message from God.
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Arc

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Re: What the fuck?
« Reply #92 on: May 05, 2008, 09:57:22 AM »

hay guys lets not start beating a dead horse
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Brentai

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Re: What the fuck?
« Reply #93 on: May 05, 2008, 10:28:10 AM »

Wait a minute, don't horses have four ankles?
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Kazz

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Re: What the fuck?
« Reply #94 on: May 05, 2008, 11:09:50 AM »

Actually... they don't have any.

 :gasp:
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Classic

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Re: What the fuck?
« Reply #95 on: May 05, 2008, 12:30:07 PM »

Basically the closest thing we're getting to a literal message from God.

I thought the horrible flood that destroyed all of New Orleans but it's french quarter was a message from God... I'm so confused.
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McFrugal

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Re: What the fuck?
« Reply #96 on: May 05, 2008, 06:40:07 PM »

New Orleans would've been fine if the levees had been built properly.
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Mongrel

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Re: What the fuck?
« Reply #97 on: May 05, 2008, 06:42:50 PM »

New Orleans would've been fine if the levees had been built properly  they hadn't spent the last 50 years demolishing miles of natural hurricane breaklands  Led Zeppelin hadn't written that damn song.
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Royal☭

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Re: What the fuck?
« Reply #98 on: May 05, 2008, 07:28:05 PM »

They'd have all been fine if they'd just gone down to Chicago.

Thad

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Re: What the fuck?
« Reply #99 on: May 05, 2008, 08:43:19 PM »

Lady drunkenly runs down crowd in parking lot for making fun of the Yankees.

Tribalism's a weird goddamn thing; "Yankees fan" and "Red Sox fan" are pretty much the textbook definition of granfalloons, and yet this person thought the distinction was worth running people down in her car for.  It's an interesting, if sad, commentary on human nature -- the way I see it, there are wars being fought at this very moment over distinctions no less trivial.

(Obligatory half-joke about how long it will take the media to blame this on GTA4 goes here.)
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