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[S D S]

Eh, I dunno, even when I was a more active drinker (what Parish called "enough Guinness to float the Mayflower" I countered with "the Irish call that 'breakfast"), I've really prerferred bars or breweries that had good food too.

I mean, I did go to bars just to drunk, get comfortably numb and then stumble home a few times when I was younger, but... it just didn't seem as enjoyable as having a drink with some decent food (or decent bar food, anyhow).

[Brentai]

I tend to prefer something somewhere in the middle of "dark wooden smokehouse" and "built by faggots for double price."  A nice clean place with friendly bartenders, no swill in the well and martinis by the God Damned Book.  The kind of place you would think was a midscale restaurant if there were any tables or menus around.

Like Sharkey mentioned, preference is probably a matter of wherever your father took you when you were first learning what alcohol tasted like.

[Kazz]

being in a college town, the only bars around here are crowded with belligerent jocks, tight-jeaned floozies (75% of whom are fat), and the sort of person who went to high school here and is still around, but is distinct from me in that they enjoy being there.  the music is so loud that it is impossible to converse, but nobody is dancing.

[Sharkey]

There's actually a fairly good place a few steps from the front of the office. Rickenbacker's isn't actually a complete damn shithole or anything, but it does have a lot going for it. Primarily: Fat goddamn cat licking the straws and whatever else, a crippled diabetic proprietor who smokes cigars while hooked up to an oxygen tank and who will eventually, inevitably explode. A bunch of signs bearing carny aphorisms, Clark Gable's motorcycle hanging from the ceiling in such a way that it's guaranteed to crush you when the big one hits, good irish coffee, fairly good food, and smoking after nineish because nobody gives a fuck once the normal nine-to-five saps have left downtown. Also, an abundance of Irish guys who are really eager to pick a fight but usually too drunk to stand at that point so you can actually do that three stooges holding-your-hand-on-their-forehead thing while they swing at air. Honestly, I fucking love the place. Especially as a general test of character. I pretty much have a habit of bringing people there and not doing any further drinking with them if they turn out to be put off by any single one of these virtues.

I am exceptionally annoyed that most of the office does their drinking at the sports bar the next door over because it happens to have a jukebox and pool table.

[BombShellFromHell]

There's actually a fairly good place a few steps from the front of the office. Rickenbacker's isn't actually a complete damn shithole or anything, but it does have a lot going for it. Primarily: Fat goddamn cat licking the straws and whatever else, a crippled diabetic proprietor who smokes cigars while hooked up to an oxygen tank and who will eventually, inevitably explode. A bunch of signs bearing carny aphorisms, Clark Gable's motorcycle hanging from the ceiling in such a way that it's guaranteed to crush you when the big one hits, good irish coffee, fairly good food, and smoking after nineish because nobody gives a fuck once the normal nine-to-five saps have left downtown. Also, an abundance of Irish guys who are really eager to pick a fight but usually too drunk to stand at that point so you can actually do that three stooges holding-your-hand-on-their-forehead thing while they swing at air. Honestly, I fucking love the place. Especially as a general test of character. I pretty much have a habit of bringing people there and not doing any further drinking with them if they turn out to be put off by any single one of these virtues.

I am exceptionally annoyed that most of the office does their drinking at the sports bar the next door over because it happens to have a jukebox and pool table.

Music and pool (and sports, if that's what you're into), or uncleanly animals running around and drunken Irishmen fighting?

 No, I don't know what they're thinking.....

[Sharkey]

Well, in the case of the juke and billiards-having place there is the slight drawback of dumbass jocks who will try to insinuate (i.e. shove) themselves between you and the bar regardless of whether you're actually seated on a barstool and who seem genuinely shocked when you elbow them in the throat for it. It only takes a couple times before you come to the conclusion that they're a little hazy on the idea that unwanted physical contact invites reciprocal unwanted physical contact regardless of the fact that the initial contactee happens to be wearing glasses. It's an unfortunately frequent misunderstanding and one I'd just as soon avoid, preferring to associate with humans who are a little more clear on the rules.

Also, the neighboring drunks tend to be, for some damn reason, old engineers, who make for infinitely more interesting conversation.

[BombShellFromHell]

Well, in the case of the juke and billiards-having place there is the slight drawback of dumbass jocks who will try to insinuate (i.e. shove) themselves between you and the bar regardless of whether you're actually seated on a barstool and who seem genuinely shocked when you elbow them in the throat for it. It only takes a couple times before you come to the conclusion that they're a little hazy on the idea that unwanted physical contact invites reciprocal unwanted physical contact regardless of the fact that the initial contactee happens to be wearing glasses. It's an unfortunately frequent misunderstanding and one I'd just as soon avoid, preferring to associate with humans who are a little more clear on the rules.

Also, the neighboring drunks tend to be, for some damn reason, old engineers, who make for infinitely more interesting conversation.

I guess you got me there.

That's why I usually just drink with my friends at home.

[Sharkey]

Hey, fuck. There are yelp reviews. Mostly about right.

Actually, spot the fuck on. And the ones who were one-starring it sound like exactly the kind of fuckers up with which I will not put. Boffo.

Even the pissy ones are a bit right, though: Norman is kind of a dick, but a harmless character. There's definitely kind of a Jabba's palace sort of vibe around the guy, but I'd keep coming just on the off chance one of the waitresses might strangle him with a chain.

[Thad]

Mine aren't.  Fucking shit, the place I started this thread bitching about is half a star better than the Four Peaks Brewery.

Fuck this town.  So hard.

[Malenkaya]

There are some pretty nice bars within stumbling distance of campus, here. And since it's a small liberal arts school with no Greek system or NCAA sports, you don't get the jocks-and-floozies atmosphere that comes with a lot of college bars. Mostly it's a neighborhood crowd, and the worst you have to deal with are the hipsters and the English majors.

There's a vaguely Douglas Adams-themed bar (where by vaguely, I mean solely because it's named The Pub at the End of the Universe) that I love, because they have excellent, fairly cheap beer, good food, and generally laid back atmosphere.

The Lutz is a darker and smokier, less hip (or more hip, depending on who you ask and how they quantify hipness) and tends to attract an older crowd. And there's an emeritus math prof who has figured out the algorithm of the video poker machines and buys everyone in the bar a round when he wins a big jackpot.

Portland also has an enjoyable tendency to cross bars with second-run movie theaters. It's something I haven't checked out yet, but plan to soon.

[belikejohn]

Nothing any better than your place of employment having 3 bars.

[Sharkey]

There's a joint a few blocks from here that I swear to fuck is used for time traveler conventions. Last time I was there I was sitting next to a mohawked guy with a hand painted studded leather jacket, a dude with a Kid 'n Play fade, and my waitress was Janis Joplin. Rest of the place was just plain fucking full of tempus fugitives. The band was actually doing some kind of fuckup cover of Brazil in allegro, which got ten times better when Jenn started singing along. Some parts of this town seem to have come pretty unstuck in time.

[Malenkaya]

Oh, and then there's the Delta Cafe. Hipster-infested hellhole of overpriced novelty drinks (though I have to confess, the cucumber-infused margarita is one of the better pussy drinks I've ever had) and faux-Cajun and soul food that is deeply disappointing to anyone actually from the South (read: me).

It's main selling point is the fact that they serve 40s of PBR in champagne buckets.

There's a joint a few blocks from here that I swear to fuck is used for time traveler conventions. ... Some parts of this town seem to have come pretty unstuck in time.

I often feel that way in Portland, but then it also sort of seems like the bastard child of Seattle and the Bay Area, so maybe that isn't surprising.

[Fortinbras]

Haven't got any Callahan's Crosstime Salloons around here, not that I know of.  A couple places that are trying to be by filling the room with campy old shit.

Recently Abby found a pub downtown that has pulled pork sandwiches, among other stellar bar food.  We were unnervingly, almost upsettingly happy to have found that place.  I like good bar food, but I don't want my bar chef bullshitting himself into thinking he's Ferran Adria.  I do not want to mix beer with a degustation menu and some jerk coming out in a puffy white hat to tell me how I'm supposed to eat my oyster jelly and salmon confit.  Which isn't to say that everything served in a bar has to be meat-in-bread or deep fried; I just want something solid enough and simple enough, and enough of it, to stand up to a Guinness or two.

Portland also has an enjoyable tendency to cross bars with second-run movie theaters. It's something I haven't checked out yet, but plan to soon.

Sounds like it'll be really brilliant or astoundingly crap.  It's the kind of idea that you hope desperately will be great while at the same time being woefully aware that your expectations are probably far beyond reason.

I will not ever understand your town's infatuation with Pabst.

[Arc]

All identification in the county is justifiably vertical for the younglings, horizontal for us lich, and required to be updated @ 21. Lucked out with mine. Obtained at 15, and just before the vertical/horizontal time/space reverse polarity plan was enacted.

If there's one problem with any given bar in these parts, it's that the music is played at the volume level somewhere between steel mill, and hydrogen bomb detonation. Not being gifted with the ability to read lips, I opt for dives. No lines outside, hand stamps, paper wristbands, standing rooms only, or dress shirt clone armies, super thanks. A correlation I've discovered intertwines with the greatest sin any bar can enact; The louder the joint, the harder it becomes to even reach the bar to order a shot.

No. NO. You do not fill to capacity, leave no point clear for quick transactions, wobble about looking busy, and ignore my friend to the point where he must smack you in the face with the twenty for a freakin' tripled priced bottle.

The Lutz

*sex sex sex*... Bummer. Totally... Mystery Meatloaf props... lacklustery...:0... snaggle-toothed mutants... Prognosis

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n-5F_7DwPpo

[Büge]

There are some pretty nice bars within stumbling distance of campus, here. And since it's a small liberal arts school with no Greek system or NCAA sports, you don't get the jocks-and-floozies atmosphere that comes with a lot of college bars. Mostly it's a neighborhood crowd, and the worst you have to deal with are the hipsters and the English majors.

Strange. I'm going to a so-called "liberal arts" school (in that the major selling point is the English Program) and the campus bar is usually chock-a-block with floozies and jocks. Heck, it's pretty much the same crowd as Kazz pointed out in most of the places along the Downtown-University bus route: too loud to talk, too crowded to dance, and there's popped collars and tramp stamps everywhere.

Haven't got any Callahan's Crosstime Salloons around here, not that I know of.  A couple places that are trying to be by filling the room with campy old shit.

Seems like every place around here is like that. Campy old sports memorabilia, campy old mill equipment, campy old railroad signs... The only difference seems to be how well-lit the place is.

Recently Abby found a pub downtown that has pulled pork sandwiches,

Sheehan's?

I just want something solid enough and simple enough, and enough of it, to stand up to a Guinness or two.

Sheehan's.

[Fortinbras]

Hell YES Sheehan's.  I could really see myself falling in love with that place.  Damn, Buge, why haven't I offered to buy you a drink sometime yet?

*sex sex sex*... Bummer. Totally... Mystery Meatloaf props... lacklustery...:0... snaggle-toothed mutants... Prognosis

That one caught my eye too.  Seemed like the biggest endorsement for the place on the whole page.

[Malenkaya]

Strange. I'm going to a so-called "liberal arts" school (in that the major selling point is the English Program) and the campus bar is usually chock-a-block with floozies and jocks. Heck, it's pretty much the same crowd as Kazz pointed out in most of the places along the Downtown-University bus route: too loud to talk, too crowded to dance, and there's popped collars and tramp stamps everywhere.

My school sort of prides itself on being the antithesis of such things.  We're all about hardcore intellectualism, rigorous academics, that bullshit. The only sports teams we have are rugby, soccer and ultimate frisbee, and the fact that the rugby team's pregame chant is a Tennyson quote... well, that should give you an idea.

Plus Portland itself is a very crunchy, too-hip-to-be-cool, anti-jock sort of place.

Portland also has an enjoyable tendency to cross bars with second-run movie theaters. It's something I haven't checked out yet, but plan to soon.

Sounds like it'll be really brilliant or astoundingly crap.  It's the kind of idea that you hope desperately will be great while at the same time being woefully aware that your expectations are probably far beyond reason.

I will not ever understand your town's infatuation with Pabst.

All of my long-since-turned-21 friends solidly endorse the nearest of the theater-bars (called the Bagdad), I'm going myself this weekend, so I'll see what all the fuss is about.

As for Pabst... $1 a pint in a lot of places. That's all I'm sayin'.

Also, the ubiquity of Pabst is redeemed in Portland by the prevalence of microbreweries. Brewpubs abound, and the streets practically run with Rogue and Widmer Brothers, as both companies are based nearby.

[Thad]

So, against my better judgement, I returned to Trendy Downtown Bar tonight, new ID in hand.

And I have to admit, I'm glad I did.

I went with my roomie and his girlfriend.  We biked.  As we were biking back, well, I pulled ahead by about half a block, as per usual.  I got to the light, pushed the button, and waited for them and for the green.  I heard raised voices.  I assumed at first that they were merely drunk and talking loudly, but as they pulled up beside me there was a third guy with them.

So okay.  It turns out that Brad's girlfriend's ex was there at the bar too -- at the next table, no less.  The ex is apparently not comfortable with her being there -- in point of fact, after last week his mom, I am not making this up, texted her on her cell to tell her to stop going there.

So the Fourth Man who had followed us on his bike was a friend of her ex, who was following us to tell her not to come around there anymore.

Now, this would be ludicrous enough if he had asked nicely, but of course he didn't.

She told him, in no uncertain terms, that she will go to whatever bars she wants to.

He turned to Brad and said something to the effect of "Good luck with her, man, she's a piece of work."

And then closed with, "You'd better not come around when I'M there anymore," and took off.

Anyway.  It is frankly one of the most hilarious bits of drama I have ever seen.  She's about ready to file a restraining order over it.  If it were me, I wouldn't go that far, but seriously, a motherfucker DID follow us halfway home and threaten us.

Brodie: Okay, then let's talk about coming up with a schedule for visitation rights.
Rene: For what?
Brodie: For the mall. I figure you can take the odd days, I'll take the even days and weekends. When there's any special feature like a sidewalk sale --
Rene: Brodie, Brodie --
Brodie:  -- or a boat show --
Rene: BRODIE!  ...I've always taken you with a grain of salt. On your birthday, when you told me to do a striptease to the theme of "Mighty Mouse", I said okay. On prom night, at the hotel, when you told me to sleep under the bed in case your mother burst in, I did it. And even during my grandmother's funeral, when you told my relatives that you could see her nipples through her burial dress, I let that slide.  ...But if you think I'm gonna suffer any of your shit with a smile now that we're broken up, you're in for some SERIOUS fucking disappointment!

[Kayma]

Holy shit, trendy bar turf wars? Should I use  or should I go with  ?