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[Zaratustra]

An iPhone 5 owner walks into a bar. Or a restaurant. Or a church. Or...

[TA]

Oh yeah, the foreman basically refused all jury instruction and lectured the jury on his own interpretation of patent law and prior art, which had absolutely nothing to do with the actual laws regarding such things.  Claiming that since the prior art runs on different processors, it's not prior art, and such.

[TA]

So, the UK courts ordered that Apple place a notice on apple.com that Samsung's Galaxy Tab does not infringe on the iPad.  Good so far.

So Apple tucks a tiny little link at the very bottom of the page with non-descriptive text.  The court did not approve, and ordered them to fix it, placing descriptive text in no less than 11 point font with a link to the full statement.

And they did!  Of course, they also script up the site to dynamically resize the splash image of an iPad so that no matter your browser resolution, you'll have to scroll down to see it.

[Thad]

Koh orders new damages trial for 14 of the 28 infringing Samsung patents.

The $599M for the other 14 holds; rest to be determined, but will be less than the $450M originally awarded.

[A²]

Well this isn't creepy at all

Flyer handed out by the NYPD urging consumers to update to iOS7

[TA]

You know that much-lauded revolutionary new fingerprint identification technology built into the 5s?

Yeah that's just the same useless fingerprint scanners that have been around for years.  Easily bypassed.  From a print you can get off the phone itself, no less.

[Mongrel]

Well this isn't creepy at all

Flyer handed out by the NYPD urging consumers to update to iOS7

ATTENTION CITIZENS

[Cait]

The NYPD doesn't have spell-checkers, apparently.

[TA]

According to EA Games, Apple paid them "a truckload of money" to delay the Android version of Plants vs Zombies 2.

[Brentai]

As far as I can tell the only story here is "EA exec says something inaccurate and tactless", and that's only worth an entry on a reel dedicated to such things.

[Thad]

Apple patent suit thrown out in Germany because Jobs demonstrated the software publicly before Apple filed for the patent in Germany.