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Author Topic: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine  (Read 9130 times)

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Bongo Bill

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Re: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine
« Reply #80 on: August 01, 2011, 09:29:25 PM »

The refugees would gather on Steam.
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Brentai

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Re: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine
« Reply #81 on: August 01, 2011, 10:03:12 PM »

Seriously, after pretty much a lifetime (specifically, ours) of fucking up, people should know better than to say "Nintendo's gonna diiiiiie!" when something they make underperforms.  They'll just pimp out more Pokemon or something for a few years and then be back fresh and ready to

save a dying genre

with a system that has a robot that actually gives you blowjobs or something.
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Friday

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Re: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine
« Reply #82 on: August 01, 2011, 11:12:09 PM »

this is why R.O.B. and I broke up

it just

it just wasn't meant to be
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Misha

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Re: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine
« Reply #83 on: August 02, 2011, 12:16:45 AM »

Maybe you know me and the apps I've purchased better than I do, or maybe you can go fuck yourself.
You maybe, but the meatiest share of the market? No.
I'm far from an expert here, but I'd say one of the biggest things standing in the way of the iPhone having good games is that nobody is willing to pay for them. If Nintendo suddenly jumped ship and started making cell phone games, you wouldn't get Metroids and Zeldas, you would get one stage of WarioWare.



And in an absolute best-case scenario where you did miraculously get Zelda on iOS...
A game that is actually DESIGNED to be played on a touchscreen could easily be a masterpiece.
...you would get Phantom Hourglass. :humpf:


The various smartphone platforms have some occasionally interesting titles (I have Superbrothers on my iPod and occasionally sink some time into it, myself), but the idea going around the internet that Nintendo is dying wouldn't mean that the iOS would become suddenly saturated with traditional games, it would mean that traditional games would be altogether replaced by Angry Birds and Farmville.

yes, the majority of games are cheaply made crap, but that doesn't make it a rule. When infinity blade came out it looked awesome, and instantly shot to the top of the top grossing chart despite costing 6 dollars, which is 6 times more than every other game. it has made over 10 million dollars
http://www.gamespot.com/iphone/rpg/projectsword/news/6317696/e3-2011-infinity-blade-sales-push-past-10-million
And this is for a game that has no known characters, no built up appeal, and no legions of fans. Final fantasy at 9 dollars sold well enough that square put ff2 and ff3 on ios. People are willing to pay more for quality, if someone is willing to actually provide it.


Phourglass sucked, but that's no more an indicator of how good phone games can be than it was of how good ds games are.
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patito

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Re: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine
« Reply #84 on: August 02, 2011, 07:15:27 AM »

Infinity Blade has very limited gameplay though, so besides looking really pretty it doesn't have much else going for it, so $6 for it seems like an all right price.
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teg

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Re: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine
« Reply #85 on: August 02, 2011, 07:40:47 AM »

Infinity Blade had loads of hype on gaming sites. Pretty much because it was the only upcoming iOS game that actually looked like a game. It was far from something with no built up appeal. :T

Phourglass sucked, but that's no more an indicator of how good phone games can be than it was of how good ds games are.
And this just bewilders me. So you don't like the Nintendo games currently appearing on Nintendo consoles, but want Nintendo to continue producing those games, just not on hardware that they have any control of and have stated outright that they dislike the design of on principle.

Yeah, sure, maybe if they make iPhone games they'll start making Super Metroids and Link To The Pasts again. I'm sure that not working on their own hardware will force them to put more investment in their software. I mean, just look at Sega and Atari: Now that they're not developing for their own hardware, they're better than ever.
:whoops:
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patito

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Re: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine
« Reply #86 on: August 02, 2011, 08:30:27 AM »

It may have looked like a game, but it wasn't much more a game than minesweeper.
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Misha

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Re: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine
« Reply #87 on: August 02, 2011, 09:42:40 AM »

Infinity Blade had loads of hype on gaming sites. Pretty much because it was the only upcoming iOS game that actually looked like a game. It was far from something with no built up appeal. :T

Phourglass sucked, but that's no more an indicator of how good phone games can be than it was of how good ds games are.
And this just bewilders me. So you don't like the Nintendo games currently appearing on Nintendo consoles, but want Nintendo to continue producing those games, just not on hardware that they have any control of and have stated outright that they dislike the design of on principle.

Yeah, sure, maybe if they make iPhone games they'll start making Super Metroids and Link To The Pasts again. I'm sure that not working on their own hardware will force them to put more investment in their software. I mean, just look at Sega and Atari: Now that they're not developing for their own hardware, they're better than ever.
:whoops:
can't help but think that you're being deliberately dense now. I specifically said that phourglass was NOT a guide for all DS games. I loved ecclesia and DoS, Ouendan was great and plenty of other ds games are good. Hey I know you hate farmville, but guess which message board played the shit out of animal crossing? that's right this fucking message board. Don't tell me ouendan or animal crossing need buttons.



re: infinity blade, yes there wasn't a ton of gameplay, but the entire point of mentioning it was that actually YES you can sell games for good amounts of money, not that people make link to the pasts on iphone.
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teg

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Re: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine
« Reply #88 on: August 03, 2011, 04:58:13 AM »

can't help but think that you're being deliberately dense now. I specifically said that phourglass was NOT a guide for all DS games.
Okay this I legitimately did misread. Sorry.

My point still stands that it bewilders me to think that somebody could actually see "the fall of Nintendo" as a good thing; especially when taking into account both the fact that past examples of the same (again, Sega) never recovered, and that they would be working around price models and systems that they don't like.
Quote from: Satoru Iwata on Tablets
On the other hand, we have never abandoned the + Control Pad and buttons for our game systems because we think these functions are advantageous when creating highly reactive games.

In this meaning, I do not think Nintendo hardware will take on any of the current tablet forms as they are without buttons, to make our game devices.

What you want is Animal Crossing for two dollars. What you will get for your two dollars is Animal Crossing Calculator. Nintendo is not about to make another Super Metroid and charge six dollars for it, especially without hardware sales to fall back on.


Also: Animal Crossing doesn't need buttons, but the option is nice. Why take that away?
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Lady Duke

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Re: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine
« Reply #89 on: August 05, 2011, 08:04:32 PM »

Yeah but if you haven't bought a particular GBA game by this point, at the end of the DS era, it was probably never going to happen.

Seventy bucks for ten GBA games you had not likely planned on ever picking up is not THAT good of a deal.

Yeah, you're right.  I decided to keep waiting based on that thought exactly.  That $70 could buy me something way more awesome in the long run than some games I already own/don't care about enough to get for the value of $70.  Also, I bought a fucking DSi when they came out, and it was the absolute worst thing ever--fucker freezes constantly, battery sucks, left shoulder broke within a month of minimum playtime/abuse, and somebody scratched my screen like a fuckstick (spoilers: it was a coworker at the gas station who was a little shit).
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teg

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Re: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine
« Reply #90 on: August 05, 2011, 08:14:26 PM »

or you could go to Wal-Mart, since they're already selling them for 170 now apparently
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Caithness

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Re: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine
« Reply #91 on: August 05, 2011, 09:23:23 PM »

Not until Tuesday.
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Brentai

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Re: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine
« Reply #92 on: August 05, 2011, 09:48:26 PM »

I think I'll wait a few months when it'll be $100.
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Beat Bandit

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Re: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine
« Reply #93 on: August 06, 2011, 08:53:43 AM »

I'm still waiting until MML3 comes out.
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Brentai

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Re: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine
« Reply #94 on: August 06, 2011, 09:05:31 AM »

It occurs to me that the cancellation may not have had an ounce to do with fan support.
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Niku

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Re: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine
« Reply #95 on: September 01, 2011, 04:09:57 PM »

So there is a way now to crash the 3DS into a buffer overflow that people think might be the trick to cracking the system open.

This way is by downloading the Ambassador program copy of Metroid, selecting Continue, and entering the following password:

ENGAGE RIDLEY
MOTHER FUCKER
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Bongo Bill

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Re: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine
« Reply #96 on: September 01, 2011, 04:19:36 PM »

Any number of passwords might produce that effect, but it lends a certain memorability to it. At least until they patch the emulator.
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Bal

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Re: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine
« Reply #97 on: September 01, 2011, 07:43:58 PM »

Ridley removes all the security measures from the 3DS, which it must obtain through a series of increasingly difficult trials and exploration.
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Thad

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Re: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine
« Reply #98 on: September 13, 2011, 09:03:19 AM »

Nintendo releasing add-on with right stick.  Well, one more reason to wait on buying a 3DS: holding out for one that has a right stick built into it so you don't have to buy a stupid-looking off-center add-on.

...so when did Nintendo turn into 1990's-era Sega, anyway?
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Bongo Bill

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Re: The Nintendo Handheld Headache Machine
« Reply #99 on: September 13, 2011, 09:31:24 AM »

It seems very few games will even support that add-on, much less require it, so I wouldn't immediately conclude that a hardware revision is imminent.
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