Brontoforumus Archive

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

News:


This board has been fossilized.
You are reading an archive of Brontoforumus, a.k.a. The Worst Forums Ever, from 2008 to early 2014.  Registration and posting (for most members) has been disabled here to discourage spambots from taking over.  Old members can still log in to view boards, PMs, etc.

The new message board is at http://brontoforum.us.

Author Topic: FX Nine  (Read 1592 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Healy

  • Tested
  • Karma: 6
  • Posts: 301
    • View Profile
FX Nine
« on: November 05, 2013, 12:09:42 PM »

Someone is publishing a free anthology based on the infamous Worlds of Power series.
Quote
he Rules: Read carefully, and make sure you adhere to the following rules when submitting:

- Your “novel” must be based on a game that was released on the NES. It doesn’t have to be a game exclusive to the NES, there just needs to be a version of it that existed for the NES (or Famicom). If it was something that was originally an arcade game or was later ported to the SNES or Genesis, that’s fine!

- Games that were actually adapted into Worlds of Power books are not eligible. (Remember, the idea is to write a “lost” installment in the series.) Therefore Blaster Master, Metal Gear, Ninja Gaiden, Castlevania II, Wizards and Warriors, Bionic Commando, Infiltrator, Shadowgate, Mega Man 2 and Bases Loaded 2 are all off limits. You can, however, base your submission on a different game from those series.

- Only one adaptation of any given game will be selected for inclusion. In essence, if we get five submissions based on Super Mario Bros., we will only select one of them to be included, even if they’re all very good. For this reason it’s probably best to either choose something relatively less popular, or make sure you’re confident that the adaptation you’re writing will be the absolute best we receive!

- Be creative! Don’t just write out the events of the game…have fun with them! Get things wrong. Grossly misunderstand your protagonist’s motives. Skip over the best fights and spend time on mundane interactions with townsfolk! The Worlds of Power books are legendarily off the mark, so warp your filter a little bit! Do your Goombas look like carrots instead of mushrooms? Is Link’s traveling companion a rapping leprechaun? Does the dog from Duck Hunt travel through time and solve mysteries? Are your ideas better than these? We hope so, and we can’t wait to find out!

- You retain the rights to your submission (barring, obviously, any trademarked characters or titles you incorporate). We will only have the rights to collect and distribute it if you are selected for inclusion.

- Multiple submissions from the same author are allowed.

- We reserve the right to edit submissions for spelling, punctuation and formatting reasons.

What if I Don’t Know Anything About Video Games? The original Worlds of Power authors didn’t either! Just use the characters, settings, and / or plots as a springboard. From there, this is your story to tell!
Deadline is January 31st, if you wanna get in on that.
Logged
the assassination of video james by the coward electronic arts

R^2

  • Not in the game.
  • Tested
  • Karma: -61931
  • Posts: 5164
    • View Profile
Re: FX Nine
« Reply #1 on: November 05, 2013, 12:48:55 PM »

Ooh, not too late to salvage it as a NaNoWriMo project too.
Logged

Brentai

  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DnXYVlPgX_o
  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: -65281
  • Posts: 17524
    • View Profile
Re: FX Nine
« Reply #2 on: November 05, 2013, 01:25:58 PM »

Jeez, these things made up such a chunk of my childhood that I feel I really ought to toss my hat into the ring.  Really though, I don't know how I could ever match the level of out-of-left-field bullshit that regularly occurred in those books without dropping several tabs of acid.  Especially goddam Infiltrator, a game that nobody ever played and that never made any goddam sense in the first place.
Logged

Smiler

  • HOM NOM NOM NOM
  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: 66
  • Posts: 3334
    • View Profile
Re: FX Nine
« Reply #3 on: November 05, 2013, 01:45:31 PM »

Brentai submit Simo Belmo as a Castlevania 1 book.
Logged

Brentai

  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DnXYVlPgX_o
  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: -65281
  • Posts: 17524
    • View Profile
Re: FX Nine
« Reply #4 on: November 05, 2013, 01:59:47 PM »

It would be more faithful than the actual Castlevania 2 book.
Logged

Thad

  • Master of Karate and Friendship for Everyone
  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: -65394
  • Posts: 12111
    • View Profile
    • corporate-sellout.com
Re: FX Nine
« Reply #5 on: November 05, 2013, 03:05:30 PM »

Has to be NES?  Drat.  I've GOT novelizations of the first two Mega Man X games I wrote when I was 11 around here somewhere.

(And the Sonic 3 one Brent got halfway through and never finished.)
Logged

Brentai

  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DnXYVlPgX_o
  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: -65281
  • Posts: 17524
    • View Profile
Re: FX Nine
« Reply #6 on: November 05, 2013, 03:09:43 PM »

Little did you know that I was actually incredibly brilliant and intended that to be a perfect WoP parody the whole time.

Really it's the only believable explanation.
Logged

Frocto

  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: 76
  • Posts: 2628
    • View Profile
Re: FX Nine
« Reply #7 on: November 05, 2013, 04:37:17 PM »

Please to be having a Bubble Bobble novel where Kevin, a regular teenager, is brought to the Bubble Bobble world. Bub and Bob are trapped by Super Drunk, but they figure out how to telepathically communicate with Kevin and help him unleash his latent bubble-blowing power.
Logged
"And it is because they have fallen prey to a weakened, feminized version of Christianity that is only about softer virtues such as compassion and not in any part about the muscular Christian virtues of individual responsibility and accountability."

  • Magic Gunner Miss Blue
  • Tested
  • Karma: -65461
  • Posts: 4300
    • View Profile
Re: FX Nine
« Reply #8 on: November 05, 2013, 04:53:00 PM »

Air Bub
Logged

Mothra

  • ┐('~`;)┌ w/e
  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: -62198
  • Posts: 3778
    • View Profile
Re: FX Nine
« Reply #9 on: November 05, 2013, 05:09:50 PM »

I miiiiight do this. I can think of a lot of games with weird-ass elements that would be petty fun to try to play straight.

Or I would write a nightmarish first-hand account of the Civil War and call it North vs. South

Frocto that idea is obviously amazing.
Logged

Frocto

  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: 76
  • Posts: 2628
    • View Profile
Re: FX Nine
« Reply #10 on: November 05, 2013, 11:02:01 PM »

"Kevin!"

Kevin burst into the throne room, just in time to see Bub and Bob, trapped in bubbles that were slowly shrinking around them. In the last few minutes, the bubbles had shrunk from large enough for them to move around to just tight enough to begin pressing on them from all sides. In just a few more minutes they'd be crushed!

"Huahaha! Kevin cannot save you now, dragons! He cannot even blow a bubble!" laughed Super Drunk from atop his throne. The King of Bubble Land raised his magical stuff and threw lightning bolts, singing Kevin's hair!

"Kevin! You must blow a bubble! You must!" cried the dragons, even as they were just moments from their bubbly destruction! Not even the finest of cakes could soothe their nerves now.

But Kevin couldn't! He'd tried and tried... But if he didn't, Bub and Bob were doomed!

Concentrating with every fibre of his being, Kevin focussed on the bubble within, the bubbles in the very pit of his stomach. He closed his eyes and grit his teeth, all of his mind solely thinking of nothing but bubbles. He had to make a bubble! Then he felt it, growing in the pit of his stomach, slowly expanding outwards, getting larger and larger... Kevin could feel the bubble expanding inside of him and, with it, his destiny. He began to open his mouth, feeling the mightiest bubble he could ever summon rising within him!

*followed by 3 incredibly graphic and detailed pages of Kevin blowing bubbles*
Logged
"And it is because they have fallen prey to a weakened, feminized version of Christianity that is only about softer virtues such as compassion and not in any part about the muscular Christian virtues of individual responsibility and accountability."

Zaratustra

  • what
  • Tested
  • Karma: 48
  • Posts: 3691
    • View Profile
    • Zaratustra Productions
Re: FX Nine
« Reply #11 on: November 06, 2013, 02:42:06 AM »

later kevin befriends the school bullies with his amazing bubble-blowing skills

Thad

  • Master of Karate and Friendship for Everyone
  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: -65394
  • Posts: 12111
    • View Profile
    • corporate-sellout.com
Re: FX Nine
« Reply #12 on: November 06, 2013, 03:01:35 PM »

Mega Man thought back to his first adventure, when he fought Dr. Wily.  And his second adventure, where he fought Dr. Wily again.  And his third adventure, where he fought eight mysterious robots who turned out to be created by Dr. Wily, who hadn't really reformed after all.  And his fourth adventure, where he had fought Dr. Cossack but then it turned out that Dr. Wily had really been behind it the whole time.

There was only one possible conclusion:

Proto Man had turned evil and kidnapped Dr. Light.

Mega Man holstered his Mega Gun and pulled down his visor, because Mega Man has those things.  And then proceeded on a mission to fight the bosses in entirely the wrong order, like in that Mega Man 2 book.
Logged

Büge

  • won't give you fleaz
  • Tested
  • Karma: -65304
  • Posts: 10062
    • View Profile
Re: FX Nine
« Reply #13 on: November 06, 2013, 03:05:28 PM »

"Woof woof," Rush added helpfully.
Logged

Thad

  • Master of Karate and Friendship for Everyone
  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: -65394
  • Posts: 12111
    • View Profile
    • corporate-sellout.com
Re: FX Nine
« Reply #14 on: November 06, 2013, 03:19:43 PM »

(in fairness saving Quick Man for last makes a certain amount of sense inasmuch as his level is the most bitch-ass hard, and doing Air Man before Heat Man means you can jet over the lava with no heed for the disappearing-block puzzle.)
Logged

Smiler

  • HOM NOM NOM NOM
  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: 66
  • Posts: 3334
    • View Profile
Re: FX Nine
« Reply #15 on: November 06, 2013, 03:19:59 PM »

My favorite thing about the Bionic Commando book was not only was Super Joe inviting Spencer to his fancy penthouse for ???, Spencer also gets tentacle raped very early on in his mission.
Logged

MarsDragon

  • NO FUCKS LEFT TO GIVE
  • Tested
  • Karma: -65527
  • Posts: 349
    • View Profile
Re: FX Nine
« Reply #16 on: November 06, 2013, 03:47:55 PM »

...where can I find an online text of Bionic Commando.
Logged

Thad

  • Master of Karate and Friendship for Everyone
  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: -65394
  • Posts: 12111
    • View Profile
    • corporate-sellout.com
Re: FX Nine
« Reply #17 on: November 06, 2013, 04:09:23 PM »

Bionic Commando: Rearmed
Logged

Friday

  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: -65374
  • Posts: 5122
    • View Profile
Re: FX Nine
« Reply #18 on: November 06, 2013, 05:48:10 PM »

Garry couldn't believe it. Mother Brain lay defeated, and it was all thanks to his pluck, his wits, and his quick solution to Mother Brain's final Mother Brain Teaser.

Suddenly, an alarm blared. "TIME BOMB SET," it said. "ESCAPE IMMEDIATELY."

"COME ON," said the robot named S.A.M.U.S. who had led Garry to discover his own kind of strength. "WE HAVE TO HURRY."

Picking Garry up in the crook of its arm, S.A.M.U.S. rushed through the door and up a lot of tiny little platforms. They reached the surface of Zebes just as Tourian exploded beneath them.

"Gee jolly gilikers that was close," said Garry. "We were almost turned into Space Pirate Stew!"

"YOU HAVE COMPLETED THE MISSION IN UNDER THREE HOURS," intoned S.A.M.U.S. "NOW RECEIVE YOUR REWARD."

"A reward?!" gasped Garry. "But wasn't learning that you can make a difference even if you can't fire plasma and missiles from your arm reward enough?"

S.A.M.U.S. did not reply, instead raising its hand to remove its head.

"No! S.A.M.U.S.! Don't do it!" said Garry breathlessly. The truth was, he had grown to love the robot since it first mistook him for the Morph Ball powerup.

But S.A.M.U.S. continued to pry away its own head with a horrible screeching noise of metal on metal.

"Noooooooooooooooooooooo!" intoned Garry, collapsing to his knees.

But it was too late. S.A.M.U.S. had decapitated itself, spurned on by some kind of malfunction. The sparking body lay unmoving upon the desolate surface of the hostile alien planet.

Now Garry only had one more lesson to learn. The lesson of how to say goodbye.
Logged

Mothra

  • ┐('~`;)┌ w/e
  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: -62198
  • Posts: 3778
    • View Profile
Re: FX Nine
« Reply #19 on: November 07, 2013, 05:33:15 AM »

Logged