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[Classic]

This claim is also suggested by FFTA2, where there's a female lead who gets human hume jobs.

... Then again, that game also has Penelo using Viera jobs, and honestly I don't remember anything about her but that she wore more clothes than Vaan.

[Brentai]

Just to make things confusing, said lead also actually has white hair.

[Classic]

And a monkey tail?

Actually, for whatever reason, I interpreted her hair as gray, pink, or purple. Maybe because she wasn't Viera? But looking at it again, that's totally stark white.

[R^2]

CRUISE CONTROL


Wait, are you implying we woke it up?

Anyway, we fight. It's a big Thundrake. No new attacks, but...

The attacks it does have are impressive.






Taken as an optional item, Ogma's Seal increases all clanner's attack, defense, magic, and resistance for the battle it's taken on.

[R^2]

Man, I should have sent Gallahan. I could have made another dumb dick joke.






Awww.

Since it's possible for Montblanc to not be in your party at this point (he can die in the Jagd battles), a lot of people wonder if this mission becomes unavailable. It doesn't: your clan goes to apologize to Mogumi that Montblanc isn't around anymore.






And this still happens.


It's an all-moogle enemy party, so Johanes and Lini steal a few abilities they don't have yet. Montblanc picks up their scraps, like these black magic spells.


A couple of them wear Fortune Rings, which means they can't be put to sleep -- but Bad Breath is just about as disabling.




"Well, Montblanc is still heartbroken, but whaddyagonnado?"

The Esteroth is even better than the Spiritstone and Ogma's Seal. Esteroth gives the same boost to physical stats as those items, and an even-slightly-bigger boost to magic and resistance.












With Killer Combo memorized, Undine finally masters assassin.
















































As the illusory ghost of a figment of someone's imagination, the queen doesn't have the summoning power she used to. I get a couple of regular floateyes instead of powered-up Totema.


Babus fights alongside us, with the same skills he used in the battles where he fought against us.




The killer queen -- falsetto optional here -- still only has physical attacks. And I still have Strikeback.




No, really.






























Sure enough, Babus can join the clan. As a Runeseeker, he's quite similar to Ezel's Hermetic: he can't change jobs or do anything outside his own skill set. Granted, his skills are a bit better than Ezel's -- and his speed growth is kind of okay -- but he's still a benchwarmer compared to the other unstoppable killing machines in my clan.






He's also still kind of a dick.

[R^2]

One annoying thing about these missions? Without the post-mission report in from your deployed clanners, you have no idea how they solved the problem at hand. This actually sounds like an interesting investigation, but we never find anything out about how it's resolved.


Oh. Well, we'll never find out this way anyway.



Giggity.


Giggi-- oh.




Said the two to the tutor, "Is it harder to toot or to tutor two tooters to toot?"
















I go by "Richard Tator", myself.


These guys' job titles all introduce them as a clan that got dissolved in the Clan Wars. You'd think if they were gunning for my guys they'd equip stuff that made them immune to sleep and KO, but nope!








The Master Brave is the phsyical counterpart to the Esteroth. It raises magic and resistance by a bit and attack and defense by a bit more. And since items like this stack, I can take both the Master Brave and Esteroth on the same mission to raise all my clanners' stats by over 25%.


Ramses masters ninja.

This rumor:


Leads to...





Heh. "Rukavi".






I attack the darkness!

Oh, his icewyrms are called "archaeodemons" and his ahriman are "apanda" in this fight. But they behave (and die) the same.


So does he.




The Rukavi Soul is the most powerful weapon a morpher can equip, but who cares? The morpher's attack becomes whatever the base monster's is whenever he turns into that monster, so his weapon hardly matters.


Well, yay.




































































Shara offers to join, because what we really need is another viera. She's a sniper, blah blah blah.

What's kind of funny is that if you kick and of the special characters out of your clan, they get new missions to bring them back: Ezel gets "Bored!", as in "I'm bored, let me back in your clan so I have something to do". Ritz has "Ritz's Offer", as in "I'm offering to join your clan again". But Shara gets the same "A Maiden's Cry" -- she gets herself into the exact same situation, scared to death by a giant bug larva falling on her head, and offers to join afterwards for the exact same reason.

[R^2]

Now that Ritz and Shara are back together...




















It wouldn't be Japan if the tsun-tsun weren't also a little dere-dere.












































Fucking kids.

[R^2]

Okay.


Nice. Mythril Blade teaches combos to fighters, gladiators, and mog knights.




Epeprism! It teaches Elementalshift to elementalists, causing the target to randomly swap any elemental weaknesses, resistances, and immunities it has for those of other elements. It's also the only elementalist skill I lack.








This mission has the highest difficulty of any dispatch mission in the game. It takes several tries before I get it.


Yep.


For most of the game R2 has gone second in battle, usually right after my opening assassin. But he's been slacking a little lately, so I made him a ninja to get his speed back up. In the meantime, he mastered the job.


Ramses does likewise for fighter.


And Johanes for gunner.




















Which in turn means the last shop upgrade is in place: I can now buy Ethers and Elixirs in Muscadet. Should I want to, they're actually pretty pricey and up to this point in the game I've gotten by without ever using one.


Hey, it's Gilgame again.




Mythril Claws! For white monks and gadgeteers.


This one costs me my Insignia to go on.


And gets me a couple guns I already have, since I'm such a prolific thief. Look at that AP gain, though -- apparently the Insignia still does its thing even as a required mission item.










Whoever he is, he doesn't have enough boss immunities.


He takes a Spiritstone to do it, but eh. I had another, and I take the Master Brave and Esteroth on missions for the stat boosts anyway.




Eldena has now mastered fully half of the viera jobs: all the spellcaster ones.




New Insignia.




And by "get" to mean "pummel".










They're a party of ninja and assassins, so of course most of them go first. They actually tear a couple chunks out of my party before I can mount an effective counterattack.




Ninja Tabi give a bit of a defense and evade boost, but more importantly, they give +2 Move to the unit wearing them. Sadly, while some enemies wear these, you can't steal boots. This is the only pair you ever get.


I didn't screencap the six or seven failures I had between the last one and this victory. I actually ran out of new missions to do waiting for this to complete, as it unlocks a couple more.


So there's that.


Like this one. Which requires a Rusty Spear, but again, we ran out of all the other things we could do. We have all the mission items we could possibly need now.




Level 48, in a game where the level cap is 50. Yep.


We pound on him ineffectively for a few rounds before it's obvious I need a serious debuff to get through the 20+ levels of defense and resistance growth he's got on me. Guess what he's not immune to!




And this one, which demands Mysidia Alloy and a Blood Apple, if I remember right.




I somehow miss the screencap, but this guy has enough boss immunities that not many status effects work on him. But LittleVili managed to land Doom status on him with Nightmare, allowing me to play defensively for three turns while his timer ticks down.


So we spread out, confident that gladiators lack long-range attacks.




:9_9:


As promised, Masamune 100 is a damn nice katana.






I'll defeat you in battle... only after I steal all your stuff!


I don't have a Genji Helm yet, after all.


He's gone Bonecrusher, so we spend the battle smacking him with Air Render, Nighthawk, Mog Lance, and Giga Flare instead of just hitting him.




You... you... DOUBLE EXCALIBUR

And that's it! We've cleared all 300 missions on our list! Certainly the game is over now, right?

[R^2]

We go to Bervenia.



































Yep.

[R^2]

I am almost certain that the laws forbidding moogle/nu mou weapons and a nu mou skillset will not inhibit the judgemaster too much.


The only difficulty with this battle is that the judge himself takes a long damn time to move, creating a bottleneck.

There's a Zeus Mace to be stolen here, but we already have one.


Cid turns out to be too damn slow, and with too little move, to really do anything to anyone. Not that that stops anyone else in my death machine.














































Abate allows a clanner to break the law without getting a card, as long as the lawbreak comes between the use of Abate and Cid's next turn. Judge Sword hits for JP damage. Bind causes Immobilize and Disable (so the target can be arrested, hur hur). JP Gift gives some of Cid's JP to the target, assuming he ever KOs anyone to earn JP in the first place. And Yellow Clip removes a yellow card given to another clanner, so long as the citation happened in the same battle (Yellow Clip can't remove cards already on a clanner's record, only a prison Pardon can do that).

Cid is a tank, but as mentioned before, he's too damn slow to move and slow on his feet to be useful at all.

[R^2]

I take the Master Brave and the Insignia with me on every one of these missions, by the way.


In many of them, the judges join the battle, like this "Official" illusionist. The "Blank Card" ability lets them change the laws to a random other set, like the Li-Grim could.












I haven't talked about illusionists much, since I've never raised one. They hit the entire enemy party with very weak elemental magic, regardless of range. This is Deluge, their water-elemental spell.


Later, he flips laws around.


...and in doing so removes the restrictions on blades that had Lini and Cheney sitting around doing nothing up to that point.


It works to his detriment overall.


I could have stolen a Princess Rod, but again, I already have one.

[R^2]

Mike Judge? Someone at Square is a Beavis & Butt-head fan.




Bastard's wearing an Angel Ring.


STAY DOWN




Could have stolen his Angel Ring, but I got all the ones of those I needed at the beginning of the game. He had an Excalibur, too, but meh.


Johanes picks up his combo skill, finishing off mog knight.

[R^2]

There's no laws enforced in this battle -- the judge is right there fighting, rather than riding around on his chocobo observing -- but he can drop Yellow Cards on people anyway.




I didn't even do anything!


Not that I needed the money.

[R^2]

Clan Ritz is still in operation, even though Ritz and Shara are part of Clan Liness now.




Stone cold, Gallahan. (R2 sits this battle out, as Color Magic and Status effects are both banned, double-prohibiting the use of Night.)


Another official with some more it'd-be-nice-to-steal-if-we-needed-it equipment.


And some it'd-be-nice-to-steal-but-we-can't-steal-them boots, too.


I just find it funny that the time mage is named "Hastings".




Stone. Cold.




That wraps a couple more jobs.


Most people walk up stairs, but whatever.

[R^2]

Fun fact: every clanner I brought to this battle knows their race's Ultima skill. Except R2 and Cid, but w/e


booooom

And to wrap it up, brave Lini steps forward to his sleeping target, winds up his mightiest blow...

[R^2]

I assume this line makes more sense in the original Japanese.












Roll credits! Again!


We're done! Again! For real this time!

Ferris Bueller's Day Off ( It's Over, Go Home [ Ending ])

[McDohl]

*applause*

Okay now do A2

GO GO GO GOG OGOGOGOGOGOGOOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOOGGOGO

(just kidding)

[R^2]

nope.jpg

I'm gonna see if I can get video software to work, then based on whether it does or not, figure out what I'll LP next.

But it won't be Final Fantasy Tactics anything.

Or Pokemon.