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Author Topic: Babies!  (Read 5108 times)

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Beat Bandit

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« Reply #40 on: February 06, 2010, 05:35:22 AM »

So if I don't want kids now, I wont get all retarded and decide I do in ten years? Thank God.
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Classic

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« Reply #41 on: February 06, 2010, 05:56:16 AM »

That's right Ryg, be optimistic about it.
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Brentai

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« Reply #42 on: February 06, 2010, 01:27:46 PM »

YOU won't.

Don't get married.
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« Reply #43 on: February 06, 2010, 11:10:00 PM »

There are lots of cultures where marriages are arranged always between a much older and younger partner. I wonder if there's something to that?
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JDigital

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« Reply #44 on: February 07, 2010, 09:44:05 AM »

I sure do wish I could marry a nine year old
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Disposable Ninja

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« Reply #45 on: February 07, 2010, 09:46:21 AM »

They could have the anniversary at Chuck E. Cheese's!

That would be so awesome!
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Büge

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« Reply #46 on: February 07, 2010, 09:59:34 AM »

Wouldn't Medieval Times be more appropriate?
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Brentai

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« Reply #47 on: February 07, 2010, 01:48:23 PM »

There are lots of cultures where marriages are arranged always between a much older and younger partner. I wonder if there's something to that?

It's about matching a healthy woman with years of child-bearing to a man who can support a growing family.  Younger men are poor and likely to be killed in wars; older women are functionally useless to a fertility-obsessed civilization.

Also yearly zodiacs like the Chinese one have rigid guidelines for age compatibility, so there's a bit of superstition to it too.
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Classic

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« Reply #48 on: February 08, 2010, 12:44:37 AM »

I'd been given the impression that it was also to pair a mature head-of-house to an inexperienced one to ensure that it was never two half-cocked idiots mucking things up.

Though I hadn't considered the "likely to be killed in wars" part of the equation. The fertility issues immediately sprang to mind. Men (generally) don't "enjoy" a sharp decline in fertility as they grow older. A man with the wherewithal to engage in sex supposedly has similar odds at 60 as he does at 20.

I also resent that someone suggests I would be interested in banging a 9 year old. That is WAAAY too old.
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Mongrel

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« Reply #49 on: February 08, 2010, 04:01:22 AM »

A man with the wherewithal to engage in sex supposedly has similar odds at 60 as he does at 20.

Don't have a link handy for reference, but this has now been disproven. The effects aren't nearly as dramatic as with women, but the older a man gets, the greater the likelihood that any children he fathers will have birth defects. Also male menopause is something that has been known about for some time.
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Frocto

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« Reply #50 on: February 08, 2010, 02:20:00 PM »

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Thad

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« Reply #51 on: February 08, 2010, 09:42:48 PM »

Chiming in:

1. I'm not, if you'll pardon the expression, married to the idea that my children be my own offspring.  I have a bit of an unconventional family, and it's taught me that there's much more to being a family than just genetics.

2. If you're looking at a real, long-term relationship, you SHOULD probably settle the question of whether it's important to the other person to have (or not have) kids, and details related to same -- if not right upfront, then at least early on.  (If you're looking at something more casual, then it's important to be on the same page regarding birth control, abortion, etc.)

3. To the best of my knowledge, nobody here is qualified to dispense professional medical advice, and anything we offer up is conjecture.

That said, my conjecture is that simply choosing not to have kids may not be enough to cope with a phobia.  Phobias are, by definition, irrational; even if you're physically incapable of bearing children, you may still find yourself afraid of the prospect.  If there's a way to get over your fear of childbirth, it's probably worth your while to pursue it, even if you decide to pursue a long-term (or permanent) form of birth control.

Of course, you're also going to want to research WHAT form that would be.  An IUD, for example, is a very effective method of birth control, but would most likely be a poor solution to your problem, as you have to go into simulated labor to get one inserted.

Bottom line, of course, is that you should keep talking to professionals instead of people on the Internet.
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Miss Cat Ears

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« Reply #52 on: February 08, 2010, 09:56:47 PM »

1. I'm not, if you'll pardon the expression, married to the idea that my children be my own offspring.  I have a bit of an unconventional family, and it's taught me that there's much more to being a family than just genetics.
:suave:


But more seriously, I think you're coming from the exact same place I am, on all fronts.  It's actually kind of a relief to find out that while not common, this isn't unheard of, and is something I can look at reasonably depending on what I decide in the future.
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Brentai

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« Reply #53 on: February 08, 2010, 11:11:04 PM »

Honestly I like to pimp adoption whenever I can but deep down inside I have to admit that I'm selfish enough that if I ever have to raise a kid it'd better damn well be a mini-me.

I mean at the very least I want to know I was responsible for the kid's base stats.
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Detonator

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« Reply #54 on: February 08, 2010, 11:14:05 PM »

Honestly I like to pimp adoption whenever I can but deep down inside I have to admit that I'm selfish enough that if I ever have to raise a kid it'd better damn well be a mini-me.

I mean at the very least I want to know I was responsible for the kid's base stats.

Adoption is like public transportation: it's a great thing to do and would solve a lot of problems, but no one wants to do it themselves.
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TA

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« Reply #55 on: February 08, 2010, 11:33:21 PM »

Sez you.  Were I to somehow find myself wanting a kid in the first place, I'd rather adopt.
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Lottel

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« Reply #56 on: February 08, 2010, 11:38:01 PM »

The way I see it, people suck.
Children suck too. They are little people that you are supposed to take it easy on because they are young.
The only good thing about people are making them.
And if you take that away...


(This may or may not be a joke!)
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Mongrel

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« Reply #57 on: February 09, 2010, 04:23:02 AM »

Re: Adoption. Don't forget that you must have a fantastic income, impeccable background and spend years grinding at applications and waiting lists to even be considered as a possible adoptive parent. Even for foreign-born children now.

Or be a celebrity and randomly sweep down into impoverished countries and steal an armload of children like some kind of freakishly over-photographed baba yaga.
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Detonator

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« Reply #58 on: February 09, 2010, 04:37:18 AM »

Sez you.  Were I to somehow find myself wanting a kid in the first place, I'd rather adopt.

I'm just saying this is the general feeling, or else there would be a lot less of us around.
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"Imagine punching somebody so hard that they turned into a door. Then you found out that's where ALL doors come from, and you got initiated into a murder club that makes doors. The stronger you punch, the better the door. So there are like super strong murderers who punch people into Venetian doors and shit"

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« Reply #59 on: February 09, 2010, 04:47:04 AM »

oh and her parents beat up their other adopted kids too you know they just didn't die
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