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[Beat Bandit]

I think I need to read that book about getting your first period to understand how to use this thing. There are like... ten attachments that all look like the same thing.

[Miss Cat Ears]

whoa that sounds way more complicated than mine.

[Miss Cat Ears]

DID YOU GET A VIBRATOR ON ACCIDENT?

[Shinra]

Rygaron, all rubbing the jackrabbit on his forehead

ball-bearings all clacking around in there

no hair is being removed but he is strangely aroused

[Beat Bandit]

I got the fanciest one. The Braun "xpressive". I'm reading through the user's manual now.

[Beat Bandit]

As someone with four tattoos and ten piercings I can safely say the following: don't use one of these on your penis.

As for embarrassing confessions: battery died with one leg done, now I need to go to work. Thank god I don't wear shorts.

[Miss Cat Ears]

Don't be such a puss.  I did my entire vag area and stuff.

[JDigital]

I always shave in symmetrical patterns, so if the shaver stops working mid-way it'll look like I meant to do it.

[Lottel]

I can't use electric razors. I have cable growing out of my face. Shit's thick. I broke an electric razor before.

I have to sharpen my blade every time or I can't finish shaving my beardy thing.

[Esperath]

Grow your superman beard out and then weave a bulletproof vest out of it.

[Mongrel]

I always shave in symmetrical patterns, so if the shaver stops working mid-way it'll look like I meant to do it.

I can't use electric razors. I have cable growing out of my face. Shit's thick. I broke an electric razor before.

I have to sharpen my blade every time or I can't finish shaving my beardy thing.

Both of these were true for me as well, until Starr bought a CAHRAZY $400 razor one year. Now I usually use that because it's just simpler, but good old fashioned blades still work for me (also like Lottel, I can only use the heads twice before I have to toss them). My hairs are so bad that good razors, electric or not, will sometimes rip hairs out by the root rather than try to cut through that kevlar mass.

I'm one of those assholes who only shaves like twice a week, but every now and then I deliberately let my stubble get too long for the electric razor though, because a real nice close shave with the plain razor feels

[Lottel]

I'm one of those assholes who only shaves like twice a week, but every now and then I deliberately let my stubble get too long for the electric razor though, because a real nice close shave with the plain razor feels

I only shave when it affects my sex life or my job.

[Mongrel]

I used to be one of those kids with a neckbeard, but I eventually realized I looked pretty fucking retarded like that. I always shave before it gets itchy, because GODDAMN.

The funny part about having a beard when I was younger was that my Persian mother would complain endlessly that I looked like a Jew.

[Zach]

One of my professors started talking about white magic and alchemy in class today, and I pretended that I was a student at Hogwarts.

I will be 26 years old in July.

[Büge]

One of my professors started talking about white magic and alchemy in class today, and I pretended that I was a student at Hogwarts.

I will be 26 years old in July.

Daydreaming again, Mister Welhouse? Ten points from Gryffindor.

[JDigital]

Zach: I think you're required to end that statement with "MLIA".

[Ziiro]

I was subscribed to MLIA RSS feed for about three months before I got sick of all the Harry Potter nonsense. I mean yeah it's a good book series but jesus christ you're as bad as the twilight people you bash

[Zach]

Ten points from Hufflepuff.

[Kayin]

I wear my beard th exact way I do because of a developing double chin. It's intentionally designed to tighten up my chin line. Not so much an embarrassing confession, but if we're talking about shaving!

Never did the neck beard thing.

[Mothra]

I completely unironically enjoy Dank Cook's standup

He's so dang animated