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Assorted Creations / The Gamers of Yesterday, Today
« on: January 09, 2011, 08:12:13 AM »
I come from a world you may not understand; a world where people who played video games acted from the birth of video gaming as they do now in your world. Also, Futaba channel-derived imageboards existed in the Atari era. Along with the Internet.
...
Magic, that's how. I even told you it was a world you may not understand, I mean geez.
Also this is totally Romo's fault. Blame him.
This is also here and not in gaming for mumble mumble Romo's fault.
1988:
>Zelda 1 is released
>Nintendo makes a shitload of money off of brown, green and black side-scrolling platformers
>Zelda 2 is announced
>it's a side-scrolling platformer and it's brown, green and black
>my face
1999:
>quake 3 is multiplayer only
HURR IM JOHN CARMACK IM ONLY MAKING HALF A GAME GIVE ME YOUR MONEY HURR
fail
1994:
Nine months after they release Doom and they're already crapping out a sequel. Nine fucking months. All the casuals are shitting themselves over how awesome it's going to be, but have you seen the fucking screenshots? You know what's different? FUCKING NOTHING. They didn't do a fucking thing to improve the engine. All they're doing is having Sandy Petersen shit out another batch of levels while Robert Prince steals some metal tracks for the music.
"But oh, there's a new weapon and new enemies!" Yeah, and all the code for the new enemies and the new weapon were in Doom 1. id Software was going to fuck us over from the start by having us pay another thirty dollars for content that was around since the first game.
1991:
Sega's business plan:
1) Rip off Mario
2) Cater to furries
3) ???
4) PROFIT!
In b4 butthurt Sonic furfags.
2008:
Nero looks like a gigantic faggot.
2005:
Vergil looks like a gigantic faggot.
2003:
New Dante looks like a gigantic faggot.
2001:
Dante looks like a gigantic faggot.
1999:
Now they're going to be too busy making a sequel to Diablo to make a sequel to either of those. They should just call it Diablo II: The Rehashed Skinner Box because that's all it is. I'm not buying any of their carrot on the stick bullshit, and if you are, congratulations, you're the cancer killing gaming.
1985:
Nintendo is kiddie. Everyone who owns an NES is either a twelve-year-old whose parents bought them one for Christmas, a graphics whore who doesn't know shit about what real games are all about, or a newfag too retarded to figure out how to play something without a manual to hold their hand.
Fucking casuals.
...
Magic, that's how. I even told you it was a world you may not understand, I mean geez.
Also this is totally Romo's fault. Blame him.
This is also here and not in gaming for mumble mumble Romo's fault.
1988:
>Zelda 1 is released
>Nintendo makes a shitload of money off of brown, green and black side-scrolling platformers
>Zelda 2 is announced
>it's a side-scrolling platformer and it's brown, green and black
>my face
1999:
>quake 3 is multiplayer only
HURR IM JOHN CARMACK IM ONLY MAKING HALF A GAME GIVE ME YOUR MONEY HURR
fail
1994:
Nine months after they release Doom and they're already crapping out a sequel. Nine fucking months. All the casuals are shitting themselves over how awesome it's going to be, but have you seen the fucking screenshots? You know what's different? FUCKING NOTHING. They didn't do a fucking thing to improve the engine. All they're doing is having Sandy Petersen shit out another batch of levels while Robert Prince steals some metal tracks for the music.
"But oh, there's a new weapon and new enemies!" Yeah, and all the code for the new enemies and the new weapon were in Doom 1. id Software was going to fuck us over from the start by having us pay another thirty dollars for content that was around since the first game.
1991:
Sega's business plan:
1) Rip off Mario
2) Cater to furries
3) ???
4) PROFIT!
In b4 butthurt Sonic furfags.
2008:
Nero looks like a gigantic faggot.
2005:
Vergil looks like a gigantic faggot.
2003:
New Dante looks like a gigantic faggot.
2001:
Dante looks like a gigantic faggot.
1999:
Quote from: MinDSlaveR
Blizzard is too busy ripping off Warhammer 40,000 to make another game that rips off Warhammer Fantasy.
Now they're going to be too busy making a sequel to Diablo to make a sequel to either of those. They should just call it Diablo II: The Rehashed Skinner Box because that's all it is. I'm not buying any of their carrot on the stick bullshit, and if you are, congratulations, you're the cancer killing gaming.
1985:
Nintendo is kiddie. Everyone who owns an NES is either a twelve-year-old whose parents bought them one for Christmas, a graphics whore who doesn't know shit about what real games are all about, or a newfag too retarded to figure out how to play something without a manual to hold their hand.
Fucking casuals.
