Brontoforumus Archive

Discussion Boards => Real Life => Topic started by: A² on March 23, 2008, 01:13:26 AM

Title: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on March 23, 2008, 01:13:26 AM
So today at work I unleashed a bunch of stress from previous weeks by pretending to be Myron Reducto whenever this one woman called in.

Short version: I didn't get her first, a coworker did, he said that she wanted a specific McDonalds on a specific street. We didn't have that. We did have 4 other McDonalds in that city and one of those was probably hers just listed on the cross street but nooooo she demanded that one.

She called in for 2 hours just to bitch. So I started pretending to be Myron Reducto whenever I got her, because on Thursday we no longer take Company A calls, and are switching to Company B calls. Which means Company A doesn't care about bad customers we get so effectively they can call in and swear and the most we can do is just keep disconnecting them until they give up.

Her:  AM GOING TO KEEP CALLING UNTIL YOU ALL-"
Me: "LOOK AT THIS MAN. Covered in HAIR. HAIR THAT COVERS THE NECK OR LEGS OR EVEN BACK. HAIR THAT WE PLUCK OUT BIT BIT BIT OR DARE I SAY WE GO FOR MORE EXPENSIVE THERAPIES SUCH AS A BODY SCRUB OR A PAINFUL BODY WAX FULL BRAZILLIAN"

"THIS IS THE EIGHT TIME" "You don't think I see. I see with your tiny little eyes, watching another green skinned little man. SHRINK GUN."

"NOW LOOK, I DON't KNOW" "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH AHH AHH AHH AHH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kazz on March 23, 2008, 01:44:13 AM
Is that a true story?  Because that's pretty awesome.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 23, 2008, 10:22:54 AM
Are you still at that job?  Christ.

...What?  Me?  Pot doing the who now?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on March 23, 2008, 12:45:07 PM
The job hunt's begun in earnest, actually.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 23, 2008, 01:52:39 PM
I could always start telling stories about MY place of work, but, the amount of typing I would have to do would make me weep.

Suffice it to say that I've reached that happy place where I pretty much dare the company to fire me every single day (please note that I'm an warranty/order office manager, not a gas bar attendant, so this might actually mean something). 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 23, 2008, 02:12:54 PM
I've done that with pretty much every job I've ever had after about a week, but then again I've never gone much above gas bar attendant myself.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 23, 2008, 03:02:36 PM
Side note: I still work with Koipond. He's trying to leave too.

If upper management knew how many good people I've talked to to convince them to quit because they could do far FAR better at other places... well, they'd probably fire me on the spot.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on March 24, 2008, 12:00:19 AM
I wanna hear some stories! That's what this thread is for!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on March 24, 2008, 05:18:49 AM
I like to play a game when I'm at work. After I punch in, I try to look helpful as I'm walking to the bakery on the other side of the store. Sometimes a customer will ask for help and I lead them to the item they are looking for. Then I start over. I try to get as many of these as possible before I actually reach the bakery. My high score is three.

It's not so fun on the way out.  :serious:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on March 24, 2008, 07:44:21 AM
Right now I'm playing the limbo game until I get transferred to a job in the same company that takes me to Ottawa.  Until then, I get to play server administrator as well as instructor  :lol:

But being instructor involves having myself take a big slow truck which can barely pull 20 mph on hills.. 

Across the rockies!   :oh:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Koah on March 24, 2008, 01:31:54 PM
:rage: I'm looking for a book.  Mars and Venus or some shit.
:smile: Oh, Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus?  Right this way.

(walk walk walk)

:smile: So are you looking for anything else today, or-
:rage: No, it's for my damn wife.  She wanted me to get it for some reason.

I can't fathom why.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on April 22, 2008, 05:28:41 PM
A lady went crazy at work.
She just started beating the shit out of the keyboard and screaming into the mic. When the supervisor ran over to try and figure out what the hell, she ran.

40 minutes later, the cops have her tranqed and are wheeling her out of the center.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kazz on April 22, 2008, 05:32:06 PM
To be fair, I'd probably end up like that too, in your job.

Or any job.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on April 22, 2008, 05:54:50 PM
Don't worry.  Eventually what place you work at will have a legal way of removing that part of your brain which yearns for freedom and equal treatment.


I know why the caged Ood sings.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Guild on April 22, 2008, 10:14:27 PM
I'm a professional student.

My very liberal International Communications professor (PHD with dozens of articles and several books published) went on vacation last Thursday. While he was gone the quarter of the class I am assigned to work with gave a presentation.

My entire group, unbeknownst to me, sucks major balls at giving presentations. It's almost like he hand-picked this group to suck.

MY PORTION OF THE PRESENTATION WAS THE ONLY BIT TO GET NO NEGATIVE REVIEWS FROM THE SUBSTITUTE. FURTHERMORE IT WOKE EVERYONE UP AND PROBABLY SAVED US FROM A D.

We got a B+.

:MENDOZAAAAA:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on April 23, 2008, 05:15:54 PM
I do tech support for a major telecommunications company who operates a CDMA cellular network in the United States. (Hint: I don't work for Verizon or T-Mobile. You figure it out.)

I work close for our center, which is 5:30 - 2am; needless to say we occasionally get the weirder folk. The drunk and the stoned and teenagers would probably be our primary late night tech support demographic. Occasionally though, we get the crazies. (I'm really starting to believe the whole 'full moon' thing)

A couple months back I'm nearing the tail end of my shift, and I call comes through. It's an older man in the rockies. He's just having some basic issues with internet access and he wants his phone number changed. Normal enough call. So we went through that procedure and while I was waiting for things to get through provisioning so I could finish up the call he starts with the small talk. It's been a slow night, so I make the mistake of indulging him.

The guy tells me he's had a bad week, apparently he lost 5k worth of electronic equipment, he attributes it to electronic interference in his apartment. He goes on further to explain that he's tried to bring complaints like this to his landlord in the past, but his apartment management won't help him with any of his problems, and he has a theory as to why...

He tells me he was having similar problems in his previous home, which was an actual house - the problems eventually forced him to sell his home at a huge loss and move into a cramped apartment. Electrical interference wasn't the half of it, though. He tells me that he was constantly getting strange phone calls from people as if they were looking right at him, and one day he flips on his A/C and it blows dirt all through the house. Apparently "Some people" broke into his house and filled his vent ducts with dirt. Just like in one of Ron Howard's early movies, apparently. (this is an important note for later on.)

He had a handyman come in and look at it. The handyman uncovered the dirt, but apparently he also found cables going through all the vent ducts. It explained everything, he told me. Apparently, someone was watching him with cameras set up in his vent ducts. The same ones that were filled with dirt. Furthermore, he'd just got talking to Rance Howard - that's Ron Howard's dad - before the dirt incident. It was all coming together.

Apparently, he tells me, 'he knew too much'. Ron Howard (famous Hollywood Director) and his crazy brother Clint Howard had long had the drug trade in hollywood cornered. But as an insider to the family, he was dangerous to have around. They were tormenting him and harassing him and watching his every move, them and their goons, trying to intimidate him into not going public! I'm humoring him through this conversation, mostly just to tic away time until I have to go home, but this story's too interesting to walk away from, anyway.

He tells me that a few years back he was in talks with Playboy to do an article about the seedy underbelly of Hollywood, but apparently after he told Rance Howard about it, Ron Howard and Clint Howard basically told him 'That's not a good idea' - and when he looked like he was going to go forward with it, they apparently beat him to the punch. (Whether they did or not, or this article exists at all, I really can't say.) After that, all the problems started. Now, he's living in his tiny apartment in a wheelchair (this will come up soon, so make note of it) with electric interference running through his apartment, management that won't help him, and a team of Mexicans living upstairs that he's sure Ron Howard paid to harass him. He also believes he's having the same problem with surveillance - apparently the apartment was open for a whole month before he signed the lease. 

He tells me the mexicans have been stomping on the floor above him, following him around through the apartment. Just like in the Ron Howard movie Rock Hard. (BTW, guys, Rock Hard is not in any way associated with Ron Howard - It's a documentary about porn stars, and it features Ron Jeremy. When "The Hedgehog" became involved in this conspiracy is anyone's guess.) All this is, of course, to torment him now that Ron Howard managed to cripple him with Rhumatoid Arthritis.

Apparently, the last incident of harassment that forced him out of the house? Apparently, a home-made microwave gun. Ron and Clint Howard, using the cameras set up around his home in the vent ducts (again, filled with dirt) aimed a microwave gun at his legs, which they made from a normal household microwave and a vacuum cleaner. Using this dastardly weapon, they crippled him with arthritis.

I advised him to 'be careful' and wished him the best of luck in dealing with his Ron Howard problem. I don't think I've ever had more trouble not laughing in my life.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 23, 2008, 05:49:02 PM
You'd think Opie of all people would be more responsible with microwave guns.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on April 23, 2008, 05:59:49 PM
You'd think Opie of all people would be more responsible with microwave guns.

I know, right
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 24, 2008, 06:37:05 AM
his crazy brother Clint Howard

(http://images4.wikia.nocookie.net/memoryalpha/en/images/thumb/b/b4/BalokLaughing.jpg/180px-BalokLaughing.jpg)
Ha ha ha ha ha haaaaaa
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on April 24, 2008, 12:52:38 PM
I didn't even know Ron Howard had a brother.  I guess he just walked upstairs during season 1 and never came back down.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 24, 2008, 02:44:26 PM
Koipond was promoted today. He just went from cheif tech support agent to the IT pool. Which is sort of going from the 4th circle to the 1st (maybe limbo on a good day).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on April 25, 2008, 10:01:29 PM
I didn't even know Ron Howard had a brother.  I guess he just walked upstairs during season 1 and never came back down.

He does apparently, and if you beleive the crazy bastard i talked to, he does a lot of coke.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on May 08, 2008, 04:32:54 PM
So I got a promotion today
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on May 08, 2008, 05:09:38 PM
gratz
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 08, 2008, 05:13:02 PM
I got, uh, laid off today.

Which was actually a promotion.

MY LIFE IS WEIRD OKAY
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Cthulhu-chan on May 08, 2008, 06:59:43 PM
so...  you're still employed?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on May 08, 2008, 09:06:43 PM
Being your own boss might sound awesome, but working as a freelance web developer suffers the drawback that you're trying to sell people websites. You might as well be selling jars of air. Minus the jars.

Nothing undermines a sale price like using dozens of sites for free on a daily basis. Youtube is free. A videogame is $50. Why am I paying $500 for some fancy pages of typed-up text?

It's also a fact that everyone has a nephew who "knows Dreamweaver." This annoying (and often fictional) competitor will cost you no end of sales.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 08, 2008, 09:36:13 PM
I am that nephew.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Cannon on May 08, 2008, 11:01:13 PM
So, Brent, I've been thinking of breaking into the industry... :pimp:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on May 09, 2008, 03:05:27 AM
I got, uh, laid off today.

Which was actually a promotion.

MY LIFE IS WEIRD OKAY

 :?: :?: :?: :?: :?: :?: :?: :?: :?: :?:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 21, 2008, 10:43:56 PM
So I guess I'm officially done with the Square gig.

Short story: they called me today, asking if I was available, and I had to say no.  Because I'm not available.  Tomorrow I deliver my third website in two weeks, and on Monday I send out two seperate invoices for $2000 and $1000.

In two weeks at Square I'd have made $800, minus the hundred that gas probably would have cost me.  Granted, I would have played a bunch of video games and gotten a lot more sleep, but the point stands.

Life isn't just about the money, but when you're kind of in the hole and your choices are between a job that will get you out of the hole and the job that put you there in the first place, you have to kind of question how insane you really are.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: sei on June 21, 2008, 10:59:50 PM
Dare I ask where the connections came from?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 22, 2008, 01:58:49 AM
Friend of a friend of a relative.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Alex on October 18, 2008, 02:35:56 PM
So it's 3 in the afternoon on Wednesday and I'm just getting into work.  The boss is putzing around like he usually is when I show up, and upon noticing me, he pulls me aside while getting ultra friendly with me.  Now, Marty is typically a laidback and jolly guy, but this was THAT kind of friendly.

(http://www.crowdedstreet.net/uhoh.JPG): (Uh oh, I know where this is going already.)

The conversation starts up with him complimenting the good work I've been doing to make second shift a lot less shitty and how everyone is saying good things about me, district manager included.  When he thinks I've been sufficiently buttered up, he drops the bomb on me.

"Alex, buddy, I need you to do me a favor."

(http://www.crowdedstreet.net/sonofa.jpg): (Son of a bitch!) What's up, Marty?

"I know you're supposed to be off on Friday and Saturday, but I need you to come in on Saturday at 7 AM to cover for someone on 1st shift."

(http://www.crowdedstreet.net/raaaaaaaugh.jpg): (NO NO NO NO NO NO YOU BASTARD FUCK YOU!) Yeah, sure.  I can do that.

"Great, you were the only one I could ask to do this for me.  I've got the paper work done already and everything.  I'll give you Thursday off instead of Saturday and I'll make it up to you for helping me out like this.  Trust me!"

(http://www.crowdedstreet.net/sigh.JPG): (With what?  Some free hotdogs off the grill?  Oh wait, I already get that!) Oh, cool.  Thanks.

"No no, thank you, buddy.  You're a legend in the making here!"

If there's one thing I hate, it's being given a choice for novelty purposes only.  But wait, there's more!  The gas station I work at had the most drive-offs in the state of Wyoming for a month, so the district manager had the store switched over to pre-pay only right before I started.  This is fine, because it's less likely I'll get put in the noose for letting punks get free gas because I'm busy trying to work.  The problem lies in the fact that no one else knows, so at least 75% of people who show up for gas become irate.  Especially this guy who showed up on Thursday night right before my shift was up and was apparently in a hurry to get somewhere.  Since the situation was so dire, finding out that he had to either pay at the pump or come inside to pay me first in order to get gas shattered his grasp on reality.

So buddy comes storming in raging about how he's gotten gas from us hundreds of times and he's a loyal customer and it's clearly because I'm a lowly (black) gas station clerk that he is being forced to walk twenty feet to come inside to pay for his gas with a check card instead of simply paying at the pump.  Now, while I work, I'm always stupidly cheerful just in case someone from corporate shows up to make sure all the slaves employees are maintaining a soulless smile while milling about like empty husks, but in the face of a customer who has just insulted how my mother raised me, I was forced to point out that if we based our business on loyalty, the station wouldn't be there anymore because our loyal customers keep driving off with our gas.  By now, my replacement has shown up and I've explained the situation to her.  Sympathetic, she hops onto a register while I leave the champion of the free people with her to punch out.  As I come out and head out the door, buddy is stomping back to his car just as a cop pulls in to get his nightly cup of coffee just as he does every night.  Without missing a beat, I pass by him and mutter something under my breath.

Officer Johnson takes a look at buddy and in less than ten seconds, has him pinned to ground.

It seems that the guy has been making a habit of driving off without paying for his gas and has been frequently changing cars to avoid getting caught until now.

Best night of work ever.

While I meant to just get him in a fair amount of trouble for harrassment, I can definitely settle for him getting arrested instead.

But still!

(http://www.crowdedstreet.net/KeikakuRed.jpg)

Edit: I think the best part is that it was a skinny pasty guy.  So when he gets sent off to prison, they'll use him as currency.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on October 18, 2008, 03:17:24 PM
You don't have red contact lenses and you don't have this soulless evil grin on your face.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Alex on October 18, 2008, 03:24:47 PM
I can give you red, but I don't know about the soulless evil grin.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on October 18, 2008, 03:27:05 PM
Nah.  That's cool.  E for Effort.  Now, if you were REALLY awesome, you'd be wearing one of those David Clark headsets, the ones they use in helicopters (You can see the D/C logo clearly in the first X-Men movie when Mystique puts them on in the helicopter.)

Guess what I swiped from my squadron when I got out of the Navy, among other things.  :wuv:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Doom on October 18, 2008, 07:56:29 PM
Alex is my new favorite poster.

Highlights from work tonight: Inspect driver's license while accepting check. Lisa Gayla Booze. Maintain World's Greatest Poker Face.

Korean Wii Mafia representative stops by. Sell him 27 copies of WiiPlay on the last night of Buy 2, get the 3rd free. Glad I've already covered with my boss at least twice that we don't care as long as they pay legitimately.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on October 18, 2008, 09:06:59 PM
Korean Wii Mafia

what
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 18, 2008, 10:11:57 PM
Korean Wii Mafia

what
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on October 18, 2008, 11:32:24 PM
 :doit:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Doom on October 19, 2008, 01:28:27 AM
Every Sunday that we have Wiis an extended Korean family comes in and buys them one at a time, for as many family members as they can round up. They never buy warranties or apply for credit cards, but they take copious advantage of any bundle deals or sales we have. I asked a year ago(my first Wii sunday that I noticed this) and six months ago(probably at a peculiar order ala last night) and my boss said that so long as they pay properly, we can't really deny them an order because it's outlandish.

So you basically end up with some old asian grandmother who can't speak English being guided through a credit transaction by her son/nephew and being very happy to get their fifth Wii. They bugged me mildly when I gave a flying fuck about selling warranties and credit cards.

But seriously. 27 copies of Wii Play(dropped from $1300 to $950.)

The creepiest part that I left out...

Is that while I was double checking the ring order, because ringing the same item 27 times can play tricks with the mind and eyes, he announced off the top of his head what the total should be and then sheepishly said he was very good with numbers.

...  ::D:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Bal on October 19, 2008, 02:15:27 AM
The idea of a Korean Wii cartel is the best thing I've heard in ages.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on October 20, 2008, 04:56:42 AM
Bal's avatar has never been more appropriate.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on October 21, 2008, 07:42:55 AM
Don't cross them or they will follow you to every starcraft game you ever thought about playing in the future.

You're going to wake up in the morning, pull down your bed cover and discover /creep/ all over the damn place and a zealot head.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Alex on October 22, 2008, 10:37:46 PM
(http://www.crowdedstreet.net/orsonwells.jpg): Prepare yourselves for a fantastically mystical adventure filled with suspense, mystery and goblins.

(http://www.crowdedstreet.net/no.jpg): No.

(http://www.crowdedstreet.net/orsonwells.jpg): What?

(http://www.crowdedstreet.net/no.jpg): There were no goblins.

(http://www.crowdedstreet.net/orsonwells.jpg): Okay, so just suspense and mystery.  Prepare yourselves for...THE NIGHT OF THE TOWER OF TERROR!

The story begins with me noticing that the fountain machine is completely devoid of syrup for the Dr. Pepper slot.  Since no one has actually shown me how to remedy this, I ask my coworker, Areal (because Ariel was too generic, I guess), to run the explanation by me.  So we head into the back room and the mystery of the soda fountain bags is revealed to me and Areal leaves to tend to the growing customer count while I handle changing the bags.

(http://www.crowdedstreet.net/hmm.jpg): Hey, this doesn't look so hard.  Figures that the Dr. Pepper one is at the absolute bottom.  Guess I'll just have to move the others out of the way.

Now our store is designed by a retarded monkey, so there's practically no space to move around in the back room between the ice machine, dish sink, mop sink and the steel rack housing the syrup bags for the fountain.  With so little storage space, the thing is horribly cramped for a big mass of blackitude such as myself, but regardless, the bags of syrup are stacked on both sides of the rack with two canisters of CO2 sitting next to the boxes on the right.  Ever diligent about doing my job right and not getting fired, I go about shifting the boxes on the left into a pile beside me.  This is fine and dandy until the foundation of the structure, a crate full of milk, gives way as more and more weight is rested upon it.  Suddenly, a trap is sprung!

(http://www.crowdedstreet.net/boxsmall.jpg): I'm going to need a Reflex save from you.

(http://www.crowdedstreet.net/d20.jpg):  ::D:

(http://www.crowdedstreet.net/uhoh.JPG): Does...does that work?

(http://www.crowdedstreet.net/boxsmall.jpg): Hmm...I'm thinking...

(http://www.crowdedstreet.net/angrybox.jpg): NO!  FUCK YOU!

My innate half-nigger racial bonus to reflex saves fails to save me and the tower of syrup boxes topples over onto me, sending me falling into the stack of boxes on the right side of the steel rack.  With a heavy thud, I bounce off them and land with my back against the entrance to the cooler while the boxes' collective falls are broken by my legs.  In particular is the pyramid of power that has formed a barrier around my left knee and ankle.  Before I can be lulled into a false sense of security, the trap activates its Pincer Attack trap card, leading to the two CO2 canisters to descend and strike me in the back of the head.

(http://www.crowdedstreet.net/KO.gif)

(http://www.crowdedstreet.net/toasty.jpg): Toasty!

Fifteen minutes later, I feel to fingers on the side of my neck and a voice telling me to wake up followed by a few shakes to bring me back to the realm of the living.  Areal is kneeling in front of me, ready to slap me in the face if I didn't get up.  She inquires as to the circumstances that lead to my situation and I explain the devious trap that was devised to doom me temporarily.  I'm not worse for wear, save for the terrible pain in my left knee and a lump on the head.

I knew I should've listened to that voice that told me to stay home.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kazz on October 22, 2008, 11:25:46 PM
Good story.

But did you do her?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Alex on October 22, 2008, 11:27:06 PM
Nah, she's already engaged and she's not my type.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on October 22, 2008, 11:35:24 PM
CLEARLY YOU ARE A MISOGYNIST
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Alex on October 22, 2008, 11:45:01 PM
OKAY OKAY I'M ACTUALLY SHALLOW AND AM ENTHRALLED WITH HER ODDLY SHAPED FOREHEAD THAT KIND OF MAKES IT LOOK LIKE HER HEAD MAY HAVE BEEN CAVED IN AT SOME POINT
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Guild on October 23, 2008, 12:55:46 AM
i totally would have banged her

also that story is hilarious because of my many memories of changing those boxes, my convenience store/fast food brother

those bagoxes of syrup are effing heavy, too... you can't stack more than like four of them or the bottom one gets crushed
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kazz on October 23, 2008, 02:16:34 AM
Yeah.

I wanted, so badly, to cut the tube and suck on the syrup.  But that would have been bad for a billion reasons.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on October 23, 2008, 06:32:28 AM
(http://i191.photobucket.com/albums/z284/Nikumatic/themostseamlessphotoshopintheworld.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Guild on October 23, 2008, 07:36:32 AM
Yeah.

I wanted, so badly, to cut the tube and suck on the syrup.  But that would have been bad for a billion reasons.

Have a friend pinch the water tube feed while you fill your soda and BAM, pure syrup (that you won't be able to drink).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on October 23, 2008, 07:41:00 AM
I think Boomspeed collapsed because I can't see any of the pictures in Alex's post.

EDIT: Now they work. Now he just needs to fix the typos.
EDIT2: Typo defeated. Take 100XP and a minor potion, Alex.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on October 23, 2008, 10:16:11 AM
I've had a mostly-syrup Sprite once. It put me off the drink completely. I still can't have even regular Sprite.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on October 23, 2008, 11:05:09 AM
On a plane trip, I had an unexpected 2hr layover due to plane troubles in the Denver airport, so they gave us all a $10 voucher for the food court. I got myself some burger king.

I took one sip and literally just dropped the cup shivering from how off it tasted. Way, way too much syrup. Eugh, still gives me goosebumps. I was thirsty so I had taken a HUGE gulp of it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Misha on October 23, 2008, 11:14:33 AM
I have a hard time drinking undiluted mountain dew now that I'm used to diet
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on October 23, 2008, 02:11:48 PM
An all-syrup Super Squishee?  Suh-such a thing has never been attempted!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Defenestration on October 23, 2008, 07:07:43 PM
I've never drank a syrup heavy drink, but I did almost spit take one time from getting root beer instead of Mountain Dew.

I put it to my lips, fully expecting the sweet taste of Dew and retched. I actually like root beer, but for that moment that I was completely expecting Mountain Dew it was the most horrible thing ever. And then it passed and it was fine and I drank it all.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on October 25, 2008, 06:46:32 PM
The worst is when the Sprite syrup is out and you get a big cupful of carbonated water.  ::(:

Oh, and I put in notice today after finding out that my now former assistant manager(still works there, I just work in a different department now) lied about me behind my back to no less than three other employees.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Alex on October 26, 2008, 10:09:57 PM
Day 4 since the accident at work.

I think my leg is going to fall off after working my shift today.

SUPER ASIA...edit: Went to the doctor today.  Week off of work due to the sprain.  Worker's comp ahoy!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Zaratustra on October 30, 2008, 05:29:24 AM
A simple rule on how to make good software for companies:

Do not ever EVER promise to use ANY form of programming practice, language, environment or buzzword on your proposal that the client doesn't specifically request.

Because then your programmers will have to use it.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'll have to redo the entire project documentation in UML.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on October 30, 2008, 01:03:04 PM
...I remember a classmate mentioning he'd put Scheme on his resume and then had an interviewer actually suggest having him use it.  He didn't take the job.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on November 03, 2008, 02:32:30 PM
 ::D: I got a job at a help desk at a large university.

...

 :ohshi~: I got a job at a help desk at a large university.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on November 03, 2008, 03:09:49 PM
God dammit, I just got done with the move, and already I'm getting harped on to look for a job. The whole bullshit of interviewing, resumeing, lying,  brownnosing, fuck.

I know I need a job, I know I'm just fucking whining right now but god damn I just want a day or two off.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Guild on November 03, 2008, 03:18:50 PM
The worst is when the Sprite syrup is out and you get a big cupful of carbonated water.  ::(:

Oh, and I put in notice today after finding out that my now former assistant manager(still works there, I just work in a different department now) lied about me behind my back to no less than three other employees.

I expect a followup to this post.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on November 09, 2008, 01:59:39 PM
Being a form email responder is exactly as easy a job as you'd think it is, and it pays 11 dollars an hour in a state that has one of the lowest costs of living in the country.

I am the luckiest man alive.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on November 09, 2008, 02:36:35 PM
Being a form email responder is exactly as easy a job as you'd think it is, and it pays 11 dollars an hour in a state that has one of the lowest costs of living in the country.

I am the luckiest man alive.


:happy:

Just enrolled for my benefits today. I pay $25 a month for med, dental and vision. It's gonna be weird, having to go to the doctor and actually being able to do so.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Metal Slime on November 09, 2008, 04:48:04 PM
Being a form email responder is exactly as easy a job as you'd think it is, and it pays 11 dollars an hour in a state that has one of the lowest costs of living in the country.

I am the luckiest man alive.


I gotta find me one of those.  (http://i630.photobucket.com/albums/uu23/Bon_Bon_2009/scruffy-1.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 09, 2008, 07:37:02 PM
Oh hey, I forgot: I was fired from my warranty boss job last monday after trolling the VP one time too many. LOL... well that took about a year longer than I thought it would.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Dooly on November 09, 2008, 10:06:54 PM
I was, for a month, a tester on a recently released game that currently has its own thread on the Videogames forum, until I was fired for coming in late.  I'm afraid to be any more specific than that because I knew this guy (http://venturebeat.com/2008/09/12/microsoft-fires-game-test-contractor-who-talked-to-venturebeat/) personally (from a different tester job), and I don't wanna go out like that.  At any rate, any mention I see of that particular game still makes me a little  :sadpanda:.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Zaratustra on November 10, 2008, 03:59:29 AM
He won't install a sliding door four meters from us while we're working, right? That would be hours and hours of horrible drilling and hammering noises and I have a major headache -- oh god he IS going to do that.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 10, 2008, 06:01:33 AM
Every time I look at this thread, I think about the untold thousands of things at work that were just so absurd. It was like literally working in a Dilbert cartoon.

Not "Haha, like, I'm literally working in a Dilbert cartoon." no, go get a standard Dilbert cartoon (well, okay, not counting ones involving Ratbert and satanic magic). That probably happened at my work.

I always wanted to come here and type endless stories about it, but the SHEER VOLUME of shit that would happen was so ridiculous that I couldn't be arsed to type it. That would literally have been a second job.

Work was a long struggle against management. At one point we were actually committing gross forgery of official company documentation to meet our requirements with our corporate partners. Why? Because of a one-line-of-code error that we warned management about the minute it was implemented. The probelem was only fixed after nine months of them simply... ignoring a completely corrupted database. There was literally no reason for this not to be fixed and when it was finally done, it took an hour and a half.

The company has the worst communication I've ever seen - it's not helped by the fact that our division - customer service - was in on constant open warfare with other divisions. In fact the IT director once made our director cry because he yelled at her so rudely and loudly - and she deserved it! Our Director and VP's style can basically be described as: 1 - Nobody needs to know anything to do their job. No matter how complex. Information should never be shared. 2 - Anybody who disagrees with us is wrong. Not in the traditional "management is always right" cliche, but to the point of actually blatantly making random stuff up right on the spot to 'win' arguments. 3 - Everything can be done by the seat of our pants. Major technical release affecting the entire customer base? Outsource a random internal operation with no infrastructure to do so? Spend tens of thousands of dollars on a program you can get for free? Abandon said program because it's not sexy enough (<- actual management complaint)? Fuck! WE'LL JUST MAKE IT ALL UP AS WE GO ALONG. 4 - (corollary of #3) Nobody - including other divisions or companies - needs any notice to do anything. We almost crashed Bell's (a major national carrier) entire cellular network on no less than three occasions that I know of. That merely the most egregious example among thousands. 5 - (further corollary of #3) 5 - Everything your employees do can be reduced to a single productivity number. If they don't match the metric, they are lazy troublemakers. If someone has responsibilities that can't be immediately quantified, those responsibilities must either be frivolous, irrelvant, or wholly imaginary. 6 - If another division doesn't give you an answer you want to hear, go over their heads and whine, even to completely separate companies.

I mean, we lived in an environment of complete, never ending chaos. We only had about one day in a given month without Random Drama. No word of a lie. I once ticked off thirty-seven consecutive work days of crises.

Our VP and director... well, I think in the end I hate them most for what they do for stereotypes of women in the the workplace (no really!). Imagine the worst, most useless, spin-pitching, control-freakish, irrational women you have ever known. Possibly someone in an institution. The director, sleeps about 3 hours a night, works for 20 and acts like this is normal. On unnumbered occasions she has emailed other department's directors to harangue them at 11:45 pm. When she called IT late at night, to ask for favours she had no business asking for, you could hear her kids yelling "mommy mommy mommy!" in the background while she told them "Not now, mommy is working" in her usual condescending patois - only problem was that this usually also happened at a quarter to midnight. Her husband actually called us on Christmas Day to desperately beg her to come home for the afternoon. But hey, the CEO's an oblivious little milquetoast salaryman with an alcohol problem, so big surprise there. I never heard so many people say "see what happens when you get a woman manager?" in my life. The whole thing was disgusting. Sarah Palin? Yeah. That. Only worse. At least Sarah wasn't directly observed throwing her own children under the fucking bus.

As for my department, well, our entire operating method became to lie, cheat, and go around management for everything. We frequently made them look terrible by admitting to other departments that we had received no training or support AT ALL on a new release or major update. We were a small department, one with no influence at all. Yet we survived and prospered longer than any other department by simply usurping all of our own management powers.

Survivived for two-and-a-half years, and made it from base peon to (effectively) Warranty Manager in that time (no raise for that though, LOL). In the end, I just ran out of patience and began publicly insulting and talking down to the Director (currently the acting VP for few months, until the regular idiot comes back). When they fired me, I assured them I would be reserved... and then came out on the floor and shouted to my colleagues "HEY GUYS, I JUST GOT FIRED!". There were probably a thousand better ways to have handled the whole thing. But honestly? I just didn't give a shit anymore.

I think the best thing was getting to assign myself my own title (another responsibility I blatantly usurped). I called myself "The Warranty Wizard".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on November 10, 2008, 06:58:41 AM
This is my latest venture:

(http://www.psdwizards.com/ads/wizard1.gif) (http://www.psdwizards.com?pk0)

I've spent about £25/$40 in Google ads in the past five days, with another £100/$157 already invested in other advertising on design websites for this month. I currently make about half of that in ad revenue from other sites. So far, a few interested people (or possibly spam bots), but no sales.

A massive waste if this doesn't pay off, but I'd probably just have spent it on plastic Mikuru figurines or something.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 10, 2008, 09:06:24 AM
I was, for a month, a tester on a recently released game that currently has its own thread on the Videogames forum, until I was fired for coming in late.  I'm afraid to be any more specific than that because I knew this guy (http://venturebeat.com/2008/09/12/microsoft-fires-game-test-contractor-who-talked-to-venturebeat/) personally (from a different tester job), and I don't wanna go out like that.  At any rate, any mention I see of that particular game still makes me a little  :sadpanda:.

Find me a game I worked on that I didn't blab about.

Although you're probably talking about a game that wasn't already available in another country.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on November 12, 2008, 12:21:45 AM
Iron Mongrel - sounds like you needed to get out and dodge anyway.  Which cell provider was that you worked for anyway?

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 12, 2008, 05:08:19 AM
Iron Mongrel - sounds like you needed to get out and dodge anyway.  Which cell provider was that you worked for anyway?



Branson's Company*. Starts with a Vee.

Do not. I repeat DO NOT get a phone with us them. NOT here and NOT in the US.

Oh I got some news yesterday. Koipond still works there - he survived by going to the IT department and escaping Customer Care. In fact for the past couple of months, his job has actually been to tell that bitch director off when she comes nagging to IT. Which is daily and constantly (like, she will literally call every five minutes asking "Isitdoneyet?Isitdoneyet?Isitdoneyet?Isitdoneyet?Isitdoneyet?" Son, you've NEVER seen true micromanagement until you've seen that woman roll**). Anyway, he's always a ready supply of dirt.

So my friend Scott (the one with the band). He was a quality specialist in our dept. He's a really stand-up, no-bulllshit, what-you-see-is-what you get kind of guy. He's a damn good worker (better than me, I'm sure) and was probably the best quality guy we had. Well guess what happened? He made a personal phone call home to his wife, during which he complained about some of the normal everyday fuckheadedness there.

They called up the phone call, listened to it, and demoted him to buck private.

Yep, they shure is dirty bastids. A day at VM without drama is... a day you're not at work.

*Note that I don't have anything against Branson in particular. In my limited experience, he seems like an intelligent guy. I mean he very well could still be an idiot, but he he at least passes first and second glance.

** She once came over to me and said "I came over because it looked like you weren't doing any work". Well. I was.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 12, 2008, 05:21:45 AM
Actually that reminds me of on of my all-time favourite exchanges with the Director. Please note that anytime she even TALKS to me, it consitutes micromanagement because there's at least two levels of management between her and me (on paper).

One of her favourite beefs was that anytime my co-workers and I talked about ANYTHING it constituted goofing off. Like, how dare we talk about work... how to solve a complex problem or arrange something  for an outsourced company, or talk to each other to avoid duplicating each other's work.

Cunt: "I would estimate that because you talk to [co-worker, my] fourty percent of all the cases you are doing are needlessly duplicated between the two of you because you're talking about them."
Me: "Really. And where did you get that statistic?"
Cunt: "I can tell by look at you two at your desks." (note: she sits at least 30 yards away, in a glass management enclosure nicknamed "The Fishbowl".)
Me: "THAT'S NOT A VALID STATISTIC." (Yes, I was condescending and yelled at her... gee why did *I* get fired? Hmmmmm...)

Oh yeah. It was like being in 2nd grade. At one point they decided I and my second-in command were talking too much. So they moved my desk to the corner. That's right. My corporate management told me to go sit in the corner. LITERALLY.

I didn't even get a red stapler.

EDIT:

Hell... that reminds me of ANOTHER story. I once heard the Director ACTUALLY SAY OUT LOUD to a fellow 9-5 Monday-Friday mid-level dude "uhmmm ahhh uhmmm... we're going to need to you to ahhh.... do this work this weekend, okay? Greaaaat. That'd be greaaat".

That was the quote. Almost word for word. Only she meant it. It took every bit of my power not to burst into hysterical weeping laughter right there. Actually, most days felt like that. That desperate crazy laughter that's the only alternative to just breaking down and sobbing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 12, 2008, 05:38:20 AM
Yeah... triple post. But I remembered another one... So my friend who was asked to work the weekend? He'd been with the company from the beginning. He's basically held management responsibilities for nearly a year and a half now, if not longer.

Anyway, about maybe 8 months ago, HR had sent out a survey to all the 'tenured' employees.

See, because this company is all about "Don't plan for the future in any way shape or form and then panic when it arrives!*", so there were a lot of short term consultants (who were summarily ignored in all their recommendations) and new hires (useless pretty faces... we hired a LOT of people on looks alone. Especially managers.**). And these recent aquisitions were always panic hires. Vastly overpaid panic hires. So a lot of loyal people who'd been with the company for a long time were understandably pissed.

In my friend's case they'd denied him a manager's title (and pay... he could give sweet fuck all about titles, but he made less than *I* did and he'd been there twice as long and had way higher levels of responsibility) for the same reason they always did: He wasn't a fashionable yes-man.

Anyway getting back to the survey, HR sent out a very long (and sometimes confusing) survey the porpose of the survey was to basically detail your actual day-to-day responsibilities. That way HR could (supposedly) correct pay levels, etc. They wanted to see what your actual title and pay were vs. where you should be based on the work you were doing. I suppose it was a good idea in principle.

My friend made a fatal mistake. The survey was supposed to be extremely confidential to each individual otherwise it was useless. But he just couldn't understand some of the questions (because he responsibilties were so broad, and poorly organized. Documentation was nonexistant) and... asked the director for clarification. I watched her come out and actually rationalize everything he did to a point where she convinced him to basically describe himself as an entry level customer service rep in all but name. I was sitting right next to him the whole time. I think that's possibly one of the most disgusting things I've ever personally watched anyone do.

Like I said... they shure is dirty bastids.


*The Future: Now arriving daily!

** Though that director was ugly as fuck... You mean when you never sleep it makes you look like a fucking cadaver? Really?


EDIT: PAGE BREAKS SAPPIN' MAH STORIES!  :MENDOZAAAAA:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on November 12, 2008, 06:23:44 AM
I'd share my dopey work stories, but, unfortunately, as I think I'm the only one out of this board that's in the aviation maintenance industry, only I'd get the humor in the jokes, so I'll just settle with this:

I accidentally left a pair of wire cutters in my pocket last night and got woken up early this morning. :derp:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 12, 2008, 09:00:50 AM
I hope that's not technically also a 'Status of my Rod' post... :ohshi~:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on November 12, 2008, 09:34:44 AM
Yeah, all I really do is complain about dumb people at this point, although current conditions are pretty nice. 

I still have the military job in my specialty field, but I work with a team of four people right now, and we're physically seperated from who we work for by a few kilometres and some fencing. 

The place is a dump, but it's a dump that's wired with Cat-6 cable and a shitload of toys.  The pay is a bit better since I got promoted the other month, but I still need to finish off my comp sci degree before I get past the 50k / year mark.

I find my best jobs are farthest away from the centres of command and involve small teams in shitty places with long and hard work that will require myself to go beyond bankers hours.  But then again as the youngest one still there, if I'm working there beyond bankers hours, so are the others.
 :wuv:

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on November 12, 2008, 09:34:53 AM
... Okay, kids.  Consider this a "MY FIRST GUIDE TO NAVAL AVIATION MAINTENANCE" by Fisher Price.

Whenever I work on the airplane, I have to check tools out of the tool crib.  When this is done, the box is checked for all tools being accounted for (also known as ATAF).  When the box is returned, it is also ATAFed.  Somewhere in there, the box didn't get ATAFed at the end of the night, and I had a pair of dikes (short for "diagonal cutters") in my pocket, and I took them home.  This is a Bad Thing (tm).  I get a call at 7:45 this morning that "Oh shit, there's a tool missing."  Now, the plane isn't going to go flying today, so it's not so much of a shitstorm, but if it WERE going to go flying...well, I might not have a job anymore.  Anyway, suffice to say, it just makes me look like an idiot.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 12, 2008, 09:54:29 AM
I think that, if my body had ever allowed for a more 'manly' (LOL) occupation, the military would have crossed my mind... but I think what I really would have liked to do is be one of those RCMP dorks posted out in the middle of absolutely nowhere.

I mean, I don't have a problem with authority per se, but I do have a problem with stupid authority (whatever gave you THAT idea?). You have a lot of free reign out in the middle of nowhere (I don't mind the greater responsibility that goes with that) and it's nice and quiet (most of the time). Sort of like Andy Griffith (or Hamish MacBeth) vs. the backwoods Canada and all its horrible social ills.

I think I might've done something useful that way. I would've had a lot more fun anyway. Certainly, I've always known I'll never be able to survive a life at any kind of corporate job. Even the flashy kind where you make a lot of money, fly around lot, and mostly just talk at people.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Zaratustra on November 12, 2008, 10:22:00 AM
"Now, the worst case is 320 instructions"
"Actually, you will never need more than 164 instructions for any--"
"BUT THAT IS NOT THE WORST CASE IS IT"

"Now we assume we can execute an instruction every 100 microseconds" 
"Uh, you're overstating the time by a factor of--"
"YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT A WORST CASE MEANS YOU SEE BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH"

why not assume our balls are being bitten by rabid wolverines while we're at it

later

"why are we dividing this input process in four"
"BECAUSE EACH PROCESS DOES DIFFERENT THINGS AND IT'S GOOD TO DIVIDE"
"then why there is no output process"
"BECAUSE THE REGULAR PROCESSES CAN HANDLE THAT"

fsgfgsfgsg
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on November 12, 2008, 10:43:12 AM
All this time I thought Zara lived in a magical fairyland where he was allowed to be awesome and productive all day without retards fucking it up.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on November 12, 2008, 11:02:29 AM
Iron Mongrel - sounds like you needed to get out and dodge anyway.

:?:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 12, 2008, 12:46:11 PM
I'm pretty sure that's a typo and that he meant 'out OF Dodge'.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Cannon on November 12, 2008, 02:02:15 PM
This didn't happen to me. I'm got it second-hand from the manager in question, but when he passed it on the occurence was probably still fresh in his mind and thusly recent (as I'll go on about a little later).

A lady calls up to place an order for her daughter and puts it on her credit card. So far, not so strange. We take the card number, expiration date, and the last three digits of the protection number on the back over the phone. We print out a slip to be signed, but because we already have all the required information, most anyone can sign it. It's mostly just proof that the order has been delivered and the transaction is completed, so the driver leaves a copy for the customer and brings the other copy with their John Hancock back. The card isn't charged properly until the end of the night, so if the customer wants to cancel the order before it goes out (or when the driver arrives at the door - thanks for the wasted time and gas, guy), it can just be voided and there will be no deduction. So she's ordering for someone else and won't be there. Okay. She knows the total bill and we're counting this as permission. Fly, my pizza delivery monkey, fly.

There's also an option for the person who picks it up to leave a tip on the card when they sign it. This is pertinent to our fun little tale.

Jeremy delivers the pizza. He's our most veteran driver, and is very professional. I'm quite confident that it was delivered in a timely manner and that he was in no way rude, so the daughter must've justifiably thought he deserved a tip. She puts a two dollar gratuity down and he goes back to home base. Not really great (particularly since go juice was around four-fifty a gallon then), but better than nothing.

So mommy calls back some time after the pizza has been delivered, and she is livid. The daughter wasn't supposed to put any tip on the card, she says. Apparently, she is fond of pointing out that she (the mother) is a cop. Like it matters when things are so clear-cut. It gets really "interesting" when the daughter says she didn't put any tip on the card. So we're playing That Game, are we? The one where we contrast a customer's honesty with that of the people you work with regularly and know much better?

It's usually at this point that we hand the customer over to the home office, because we can't give money back for an order. Naturally, they'd love us for granting them the honor of dealing with this harridan. However, the mother won't let it go. She's not making any big deal out of the order in itself, she just thinks Jeremy is a thief and her daughter is innocent. The manager relents, and agrees to send another driver (Jon) back to the address with two dollars.This is irregular, but gives me an idea of what a pain in the butt she was. Interestingly, the daughter wouldn't even come to the door to accept the refunded tip. Almost like she's... Ashamed of something she did wrong, perhaps? Jon says she whispered something to the effect of "No, no. I don't want to even look at him." Some dude takes the couple bucks and Jon returns.

Ring, ring. Officer McKvetchy is not done.

Couldn't she just call the local office and register a complaint? No, she's here with the daughter in a conference call! And she's apparently a stuck recording. "Blah, blah, I'm a cop. Your guy is a crook." The manager has had enough. He's listened to her carry on about this for nearly an hour, so she needs to SHUT UP. That's verbatim. He outright shouted out the "silence, foul witch" part when he was telling me the story. You could hear a pin drop after. The manager relays his end of things, and says that Jeremy has a virtually photographic memory when it comes to his job (this is true, and helps with his efficiency, naturally). I don't recall him saying he did this, but he probably pointed out that Jeremy couldn't have held down his gig for over a decade if he wasn't trustworthy.

"Well, can you make some note that anyone delivering a credit card order here shouldn't get a tip?"

"Ma'am, that's a moot consideration now." Click.

Funny. We usually only blacklist a place after multiple problem orders. I wonder why he made an exception...?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Guild on November 12, 2008, 03:31:17 PM
Quote
It gets really "interesting" when the daughter says she didn't put any tip on the card. So we're playing That Game, are we? The one where we contrast a customer's honesty with that of the people you work with regularly and know much better?

Wait, you didn't even know if there was a tip? Or you found out about it after this phonecall?

Wouldn't it have been easier just to remove the tip from the bill? Did your company tell her at the time of her phone purchase that a tip option came with the home-sign receipt?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on November 12, 2008, 04:01:51 PM
How did mommy know that a tip was made in the first place???
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Cannon on November 12, 2008, 05:10:25 PM
Wait, you didn't even know if there was a tip? Or you found out about it after this phonecall?

Wouldn't it have been easier just to remove the tip from the bill? Did your company tell her at the time of her phone purchase that a tip option came with the home-sign receipt?

Yes, the manager knew there was a tip. It's written on the copy we get back and the driver gets it with their drive pay when they're cashed out at the end of the night. He wouldn't have added it on there otherwise. What the daughter was doing was lying when she said she didn't write the tip on there.

Also, yes. They could've just taken the tip off, even after it was "locked in" after the order was closed. The manager wanted Jeremy to keep his tip AND for the mother to be happy because she got her money back, practically speaking. I would assume that Jon was taking a run that was close. He was doing Jeremy a favor, obviously. It was only two bucks, so he had to have paid out of pocket. This is not normal, but just proves to me that the manager wanted the matter closed.

Come to think of it, there could've been a gap of a few days between Jeremy's delivery and the mother calling in and not much would be lost. So either the manager didn't want Jeremy to be stiffed, or the transaction had been completed utterly and she wanted her two dollars back. I do believe it was the former, but everything holds if it was the latter.

Sometimes we do point it out to them (I'm a driver, so I make a habit of mentioning it when I take phone orders), but we don't really need to when the "gratuity" space is written on the credit card slip that they sign. Some people just casually sign it and hand it over without either noticing or caring (which means that if they didn't tip in cash, they didn't really care about tipping at all - What's so hard about asking the driver "Okay, can I add a tip to this?"); the daughter had to have been looking for it, or asked about it.

How did mommy know that a tip was made in the first place???

We take the card number, expiration date, and the last three digits of the protection number on the back over the phone. We print out a slip to be signed, but because we already have all the required information, most anyone can sign it. It's mostly just proof that the order has been delivered and the transaction is completed, so the driver leaves a copy for the customer and brings the other copy with their John Hancock back.

Hmm. It would seem to be the latter, then. The mother checked her account and it didn't match the record the driver left. The daughter couldn't have gotten away with lying if she was stupid enough to record the tip on the copy she got from the driver.

I know there could've been an addition of "at least a day" between the main events, but that doesn't change up anything. She read the ticket. Mother is a controlling harpy and daughter is a fibber. My storytime is over. Better luck next time, Shinra.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on November 12, 2008, 06:13:01 PM
(grievances that would look good nailed to the door of your former workplace)

Now I know why you and Koi want to come work at the bakery.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 12, 2008, 07:41:00 PM
Actually things are looking okay. Might get a job with Honda (same kind of warranty nonsense).

At any rate, that's just survival stuff. The real plan is to go back to school to get a teaching Masters (apply in a little under a year, be in school in a little less than 2) and go annoy kids for the rest of my life.

It's something I resisted for a long time, because I didn't want it to be a case of "Those who can't do, teach.", but enough time has passed that I'm sure this is something I'll enjoy (and be good at) on its own merits.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 13, 2008, 11:08:10 AM
More hilarious tales from (ex)-work.

So. When I started, the office had nice decent computer chairs to sit in. Not super-expensive, but good and serviceable. Wear and tear (and a little abuse) took its toll on a lot of the chairs, whose armrests started falling apart. Keep in mind that these chairs had been in a call centre environment for nigh on 3 years; so it wasn't like these chairs hadn't done their fair duty.

So when they bought chairs to replace some of the old ones, they did something interesting: they bought chairs with no armrests at all. Now I dunno about you guys, but that's ergonomically horrible and a GREAT way to give all your employees carpal tunnel. It was a stupid kneejerk reaction on the part of management and yet another example of their preferred "Schoolmarm/Bad Mom" school of management. So my running gag regarding the chairs became to mimic the director's voice and say "If you kids can't treat your armrests nicely, you won't have any at all!"

I called a friend at work today to ask about some stuff and you know what he told me was going on?

A workman was going around the office removing all the armrests from the chairs that still had them.

 :wakka: :scanners:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on November 13, 2008, 11:13:37 AM
...At my old job, I had a chair with only ONE armrest.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Fredward on November 13, 2008, 11:16:44 AM
Was it on the wrong side, too?  ::D:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on November 13, 2008, 12:44:41 PM
oh boy I sure am glad I have a whole day off to myself to play lich king

Oh wait I'm at work because someone called in sick, just like what happened the past two weeks.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on November 13, 2008, 01:22:38 PM
I have until Christmas to essentially rebuild an entire piece of software, because all they can do is complain about how it doesn't work, when they DIDN'T GIVE ANY REQUIREMENTS TO BEGIN WITH.

Research Guy: Hey.  Hey Max.  Make a Survey system.

Max: Okay.

Band-aid fixes become entire bloody bolt-on features.  Code-bloat becomes almost exponential as we put bolt-ons on top of bolt-ons.  It's got more rivets than a naval carrier and about as effective as 40k ork engineering.

Research Guy: This thing sucks.  I can't work it very well.  The users can't do X, Y, and Z.

Max: Couldn't you have said something BEFORE I finished it?  Perhaps during the previews I sent you?  Your direct reports actually use this very well, and were able to use the manual I made.

Research Guy: I want to be able to adjust all the spacing.  I want to be able to assign colors to arrows.  Want want want.


My boss really needs to focus on requirements gathering.  I'm more of a programmer than a developer.  (Write code vs. write problem solution).

So now I have to drop every fucking thing, including the next seven projects in line, and redo this.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 24, 2008, 07:40:35 AM
Just had a second interview for the 45k/yr job. Went well. Found out today that if they like me enough, I get to fly to the US home office for the final interview, so this shit is the real deal, unlike just about every other shit job I might get.

:perfect:

The funniest part was that the local guy seemed almost entirely concerned about my French... which was way better than his. But he held the entire interview in French. I actually felt so sorry for the guy as he soldiered on with his mediocre French. But at least that meant I looked reeeeeeaaaaaaal gooooood.

 :suave:

Only problem: Head Office is in New Jersey.  :ohshi~:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Cannon on November 27, 2008, 10:48:51 PM
Busy days are in some ways the worst for me, because while they're generally pretty profitable, I'm inclined to do boneheaded things, or just get the folk that think I estimated "forty-five minutes to an hour/an hour to an hour fifteen" for arrival and was just playing around with their cranky selves for giggles (to be fair, sometimes the former is tied into the latter, but here I was making pretty good time). Now and then, some unspoken and vague house rule of the cosmos is broken or bent, and the cosmic Dungeon Master singles me out for a surreal reprisal.

Things start off unassumingly enough. I pull up to the house, and though it's colder than a frost giant's butt, I park a ways from the short road to the garage. It wasn't far to walk to the front door from, and I try to make a habit of not blocking entrances/exits when I deliver to residences.

:sarcasm:: A young boy with unkempt blond hair approaches you from yon open garage, hands in jacket pockets. He asks you to come around back.

:wank:: Le sigh. Somehow I doubt all the warm air is kept in by that huge, gaping entrance. Yeah, okay, I'll play along. Can't take that long to make the exchange.

:sarcasm:: The garage is surprisingly tidy. A few tools are on display on racks, and a lone, worn skateboard lays idle on the ground. The otherwise friendly young companion next to you says that the money is next door, though you can leave your parcel of nourishing foodstuffs here, in the chamber for horseless carriages. Several more striplings look in and on from the nearby portal that leads into the dwelling proper.

:wank:: ...Can you pick a style of speech, man? Are you just going to have me move from place to place because you want to get this thing back on rails? C'mon. Throw me a bone, here.

:sarcasm:: Fine, fine. One of the other boys volunteers to run next door and get the cash.

:wank:: Okay. Guess I'll be trusting and hand over the pies. I can beat the food out of them if they try to short me, I suppose.

:sarcasm:: Yeah, none of them look beyond fifteen or sixteen wint-

:wank:: Stop that.

:sarcasm:: They're young teens.

:wank:: Ahem. "So, why not grab a slice, dude? It should still be warm."

:sarcasm:: Ahem.

:america:: "Oh, it's not for me."

:wank:: ...Yeah, dead end there. I guess I'll clam up until Wally West gets back with the gold. Erm. Money.

:sarcasm:: A female teenager who's standing in the door jamb pipes up unprompted. She-

:wank:: Wait. What? You said they were all boys.

:sarcasm:: She looked like a boy, see? Short hair. Tomboy digs. It's the South, and remember Jen next door from your work? She's quite dude-ish, so it happens. She's speaking now, so you can guess pretty reasonably that she's female.

:wank:: ...Whatever. Why do I even put points into Perception if neither of us roll for it?

:gay4:: "Hey, do you like to skateboard?"

:wank:: "No."

:gay4:: "Do you like to dance?"

:wank:: "Well, I dance a little."

:gay4:: "Would you like to dance with me?"

:wank:: ...Where is this going?

:sarcasm:: Okay, rolling for Diplomacy.

:wank:: ...What? What is this? What are we doing here?

:sarcasm:: The girl approaches you, snapping her fingers and swinging her hips.

:wank:: I'm making a Perception check. I want to see the others' reaction. Maybe it's a joke or something.

:sarcasm:: There's a -5 penalty due to how awkward this is.

:sarcasm:: Aaaaand you blow the roll. You don't even notice if anyone else is lingering, though the kid from before has returned with the money. He's hard to miss because he's standing between you and the girl now.

:wank:: All right, if you're making details up as we go along, then I still have the delivery bag and ticket, so I quote the price to the kid as though nothing is happening. So there.

:gay4:: "Bow-chicka... Bow-bow-chicka..."

:wank:: ...Ugh. Well, do I get a tip from the guy?

:sarcasm: Yeah... How do you respond?

:wank:: Standard canned responses about having a good day and enjoying the food. Do I... Do I need to roll something to get back to my car?

:sarcasm:: No...

:wank:: Freedom.

:gay4:: "'Bye! I love you."

:wank:: ...Okay, I linger a bit once I'm presumably out of sight to listen for laughter.

:sarcasm:: Perception check, then.

:sarcasm:: Beat the DC. You hear nothing.

:wank:: Your random encounter tables need serious work.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on November 27, 2008, 11:30:49 PM
IN SOVIET JERKISTAN, JAILBAIT TROLLS FOR YOU
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on November 30, 2008, 09:08:08 PM
(http://i191.photobucket.com/albums/z284/Nikumatic/019.jpg)

 :victory:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 30, 2008, 09:09:04 PM
But... there were three of them without Vanilla Ice!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on December 01, 2008, 07:21:06 AM
Then it is a movie and a surprise!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on December 01, 2008, 08:52:48 AM
But... there were three of them without Vanilla Ice!

NO. THERE WERE ONLY TWO. YOU ARE MISTAKEN.

THE PERIOD BETWEEN SECRET OF THE OOZE AND TMNT WAS WITHOUT CINEMATIC REPRESENTATION OF TURTLES WHO ARE MUTANTS AND NINJAS.

TO ACKNOWLEDGE OTHERWISE IS TO DISRUPT THE FOUNDATIONS OF REALITY.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on December 01, 2008, 09:07:04 AM
What about all the stuff from the third movie on the trophy shelf at the end of TMNT?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 02, 2008, 04:18:05 PM
So, uh, while I was with [cellphone company] I was entitled to their shitty employee plan. Basically $20 for free each month and a small rate reduction. It was crap enough that I didn't bother and just paid for my own plan normally like any other customer.

What I did instead was put my brother's cellphone in my name and gave HIM the employee plan.

Well, today we confirmed he's still getting free phone service. :glee:

Disclosure: This was a known problem they had before, but they had supposedly implemented a fix to prevent it ever happening again.

 :richiam:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 05, 2008, 07:54:48 AM
The same day that Canada announces the worst job losses in 26 years... I finally got a new job.  :profit:

That's probably appropriate for me.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 05, 2008, 12:39:33 PM
Oh, one other funny thing from yesterday.

When flying to my interview (I had to fly to New Jersey for the final interview) I spent most of the flight there whistling the theme to The Dam Busters.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on December 06, 2008, 12:42:32 AM
So I'm instructing on this course where I'm essentially teaching future leaders how to teach in the reserves on top of my normal 9 to five weekday job.. 

Tonight I was originally supposed to go see a NIN concert in town, but I sold my ticket off to a comrade of mine, because some dudes need some last-minute assistance, which is normal as it gets.  As a result, I spent after hours until about midnight instead of seeing the best concert in my life assisting those who needed assistance with their plans and with run-through's.  Some of these young men and women need it.

Afterwards just as I was walking out, I got two calls from my cell.  One was from my best friend who I haven't seen in two months due to excessive work and distance who was shooting pool downtown.  His ex, at the same time, called me and told me that herself and three of her hottest friends were dancing the night away my favorite stine of a night club. 

I rejected both of them, because frankly, I wake up at five dark thirty, go on a run, then go back to the classroom to assist and assess. 

I walked up the concrete stairs with the brick buildings behind me, students setting up their beds for the weekend, and walk up a old concrete set of stairs that were so old that they were probably used for the building that came before this post-war re-renovated relic. 

As I ascend slowly, I can see the light beaming through the leafless Garry Oaks on the mossy hills with a deep tone of yellow, complimented by their trademark buzz.

It started to drizzle. 

As I walked to the parking lot close to my car, under one of these lights on  the parking lot which was once the concrete foundation for one of the older derelict structures, with the foot and a half of concrete wall playing as the ends, the treaded gravel replacing the holes in the ground of this symbol of the legacy that once was...

I noticed beneath the hillsides,

(Camera pans to the left, rotating around the main character)

The Harbour which was once the origin of all western civilization in this area.  In the background, there are some faded silhouettes of the tops of the evergreen hillsides before the dark blue sky

(camera rotates behind main, slowly levitating.  Increase the rain)

The lights of the cranes shine boldly, with the blue shapes in the dozens below, the pacific fleet. 

I step on the concrete and take a second to bring in the beauty. 

For a man who literally has no life, I have it pretty interesting.  For what is supposed to be a year and a half of limbo before I finish my last year of school, I have blown up big pyres on avalanche-prone mountains, I have tobogganed down a mountainside with a dead generator in the dead of a blizzard, only to pull another one up, I have learned lots, I have gone an entire week without sleep while learning the finer parts of leading sheep to their doom - except they are more intelligent than sheep, and we live.  I have heard first-hand the "whine" sound effect in half-life two when a grenade goes off too close to your head and was amazed on the accuracy of the sound effect in the game to real life!

I led and was admired by several young men from ages 17 to 37 who didn't know any better who I taught for four months.  I learned the ins and outs of the bureaucracy with the sole intent of finding the beauty in it's inperfection as if it was all a Michel Gondry flick!

I've also been a part of things in small teams that has never been done, raising the bar in our own way.  I've fought with corporations for silly things like electrical diagrams of equipment that magically appeared in our lots well before I joined at the tender age of 16.  I've won most times, and in the times I haven't, I just cheated and downloaded off of the internet through peer to peer.

And yet through all of this character growth through work, I feel like I still have much to learn and much to grow.  I still stutter, I still talk too fast.  I have a hard time taking control of large groups unless I have a real purpose as opposed to a phoney "paint-the-rocks" scheme.

As I starred out at the western fleet, at something I never really was part of and yet is so beautiful, I have my blessings no matter how much my life if fucked up. 

(Camera zooms out while approaching an overhead view as main character backs off cliff's edge back to car)

Because stable is boring,

And because chances are when you tell yourself, "you know, this may be a bad thing", chances are there's a good chance it will result in a good story. 

And yet, I get boned again tomorrow night, all night from having a standard social life.  Oh well, there's always Wednesday..
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on December 10, 2008, 09:29:20 PM
So...Walmart's response to the whole 'employee trampled to death on Black Friday' thing?

Mandatory safety meetings!

 :lol: :lol: :lol: :endit:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Zaratustra on December 11, 2008, 03:53:35 AM
1) don't be in front of the door
2) don't be near the door
3) don't be in walmart during black friday
4) don't work in walmart
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on December 15, 2008, 08:51:16 PM
So today at work, a customer returned a pizza because it was raw.

This wouldn't be worth noting, except, as previously mentioned, I work at Walmart. In the frozen foods section.

 :facepalm:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Arc on December 15, 2008, 08:56:13 PM
The origin?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=18KzwK5gMtA
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Romosome on December 15, 2008, 08:58:38 PM
thank god they're having mandatory safety meetings

if only that careless temp worker hired for black friday had learned proper safety before he was directly assigned to stand in front of a door holding back a seething throng of unsupervised people
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on December 15, 2008, 09:15:27 PM
So every year we do the physical fitness test with a big group of people.  This year, it was a good 13 km march with 54 lbs worth of weight for less than 2h, 15m, followed by a 100m fireman's carry in 60sec or less.

For the firemans carry, I ended up hauling the largest dude there, at a whopping 240 lbs, and swore in front of the cameras, and important people as I was running near the end.  I got the top timing, but did I look bad on the local news that night...
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Arc on December 15, 2008, 09:44:50 PM
:objection: You carried Magilla Gorilla and made Popeye blush.

I got the top timing, and did I looked badASS on the local news that night!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Zaratustra on December 16, 2008, 04:55:41 AM
remind me to never piss off SCD from a close range
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 22, 2008, 08:19:49 PM
The new company is paying me for the Saturday I spent in the airport.

I DEFINITELY let out a girlish giggle.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on December 23, 2008, 03:06:12 AM
If it's on business travel, then that's not unusual.

What IS unusual is for business travel on a traditional time-and-a-half day.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 23, 2008, 03:54:33 AM
I was supposed to travel on Friday  (http://brontoforum.us/index.php?topic=2105.0)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Arc on December 23, 2008, 10:03:16 AM
Best you didn't.

She's a rough ride.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Zaratustra on December 23, 2008, 03:27:45 PM
well cushioned though
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on December 23, 2008, 03:31:39 PM
in soviet russia
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on December 23, 2008, 06:04:06 PM
tl;dr
Give her my number?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on December 29, 2008, 10:14:18 PM
I got a job.

More later.  I have to go to bed, so I can get up early tomorrow and go to my job.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Arc on December 29, 2008, 11:21:27 PM
(http://img126.imageshack.us/img126/7763/frankdrf2aq0.jpg)

Welcome aboard!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rosencrantz on December 29, 2008, 11:31:02 PM
I got a job.

More later.  I have to go to bed, so I can get up early tomorrow and go to my job.

Congrats!  :perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Koah on December 30, 2008, 05:14:44 PM
There's something... special about getting a call from a staffing agency calling on behalf of a company to inform you that you've been terminated from your position.  I wouldn't really mind half as much if it were the company proper calling me, and half again if they said it to my face, but y'know, why mess with this wonderful passive-aggressive atmosphere we've fostered?

I'm feeling fucked over, burnt out, resigned and vaguely apathetic, like a cynical Japanese schoolgirl. "Oh, you guys again.  Nice to see you.  Boy, that tubal ligation keeps payin' for itself." (image of me pantomiming smoking goes here) "You guys want to speed this up a little?  I got class in fifteen minutes."

Fucked over from everything overall, I mean, of which this is merely a small facet in a grander scheme.  Analogies about boots and human faces come to mind most readily.  I'd petition you all for possible employment but I don't have much in the way of desirable, marketable skills that aren't ridiculously common.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on December 30, 2008, 08:42:08 PM
New job is nothing spectacular -- in fact, it's pretty much what I was doing right out of high school, which does not help the overwhelming sense of inertia in my life.

But hey, work's work, and come down to it, I'm making $1.50 more an hour than my old job, it's easier work, and nobody is going to call me at 2 AM on a Sunday.  My objection to my old job was not simply the hard work or the low pay, it was the combination of the two; I told them flat-out that I'd stay on at the same salary if they'd let me work a straight 8-5 day.

Anyway.  This isn't really the kind of sophisticated IT or programming work I'd have liked, but it's something.  Contract's for three months; if nothing else, I'm paying my dues with the temp agency, who'll give me higher regard for doing a job I'm overqualified for and sticking with it for the duration of the contract rather than bail the first chance I get (which is what the last guy apparently did).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on January 09, 2009, 04:26:33 PM
So I'm going over to another city to another "sister unit" for a week.  Problem is that I have a vehicle that needs to be secured in a fenced compound, as rules dictate. 

The other city requested the vehicle and its equipment. 

Problem is that tonight when I arrive, they've refused to have someone over there to unlock the compound for us.  This pissed my boss, a sharp and competent man, off.  The result:  He gave me a pair of bolt cutters, a blowtorch, a high-quality lock and two keys and told me that no matter what, the vehicle needs to be secure. 

I plan to be strategically late the next morning after I sleep in a hotel this night.  Interdepartmental drama, like the stuff you see on the beginning of the wire - season two is fun IRL.   :perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on January 09, 2009, 04:51:44 PM
So, not at all to my surprise, my help desk job is incredibly fucking awful. I think I'm going to get my dentist/doctor's appointments in while I have healthcare, get a few dollars in the bank, and continue the job/grad school search. Balls.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 09, 2009, 07:36:48 PM
This pissed my boss, a sharp and competent man, off.  The result:  He gave me a pair of bolt cutters, a blowtorch, a high-quality lock and two keys and told me that no matter what, the vehicle needs to be secure.

Your boss is awesome.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on January 10, 2009, 01:35:39 AM
An amendment.  To emphasize how much I want to be an ass about it, I am showing up to work hungover, but this post really should be in the drunk thread
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on January 10, 2009, 10:14:13 AM
You can learn a lot about your coworkers by how they respond to an obvious question.

I've been imaging PC's -- P4's of the HP/Compaq variety -- and then sticking a couple gigs of RAM in them to send out to other branches.

At one point, I asked one of my coworkers, "What are these people doing that they need 2 gigs of RAM for?"

He responded, "That's MY question.  They are fucking bitches who whine all the time and get whatever they want."  The tirade continued for some time.

I asked another coworker the same question later, and he said "You'd be surprised."

I responded, "Well, actually, I would, because I'm the one installing software on these computers, and I don't see Vista or Photoshop anywhere, I just see Office 2003 running on XP."

The first guy is honest but volatile.  The second has a stick up his ass, never questions anything, and expects everyone to do everything in a very specific way.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on January 10, 2009, 02:38:35 PM
If it's corporate, they're probably getting the upgrades for free. That gig of RAM goes straight to the expense budget and nobody questions it.

If it's home user, they may be confused by advertising that claims more RAM will make your computer faster, or they may be confusing primary and secondary memory and are afraid they'll run out of capacity for pirate music.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on January 10, 2009, 02:50:13 PM
If it's corporate, they're probably getting the upgrades for free. That gig of RAM goes straight to the expense budget and nobody questions it.

Well, a quick look at NewEgg is telling me that a gig of Kingston PC5300 sells for about $10 these days, so it's not like the company's going bankrupt on it.  But in a recession where we're reusing PC's, monitors, printers, and motherfucking BUBBLE WRAP as much as we possibly can, it still seems like a stupid way to be spending money.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on January 11, 2009, 08:17:43 PM
So I was playing time crisis on the ferry back home. 

Some father was shocked when I looked at him.  I asked him if he was alright. 

He claimed that he thought I was a real-life mannequin - an advert for my work.

Whoa.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 14, 2009, 06:04:39 PM
So, I've finally been at work long enough for Weird Things to begin to happen to me again. Seems that just goes with the territory.

Now, a brief backgrounder: The company I work for has been selling its product in Canada for years now, only through a distributor. This past December, they took over the whole operation and are now directly selling their own stuff to the Canadian market. The parent company is in New Jersey*. This means that the Canadian operations are tiny. There are only maybe 20 Canadian employees total, and only three of us in the Toronto head office where I work (I have my own office, it's cool and shit, blah blah whothefuckcares). I'm basically the entire inventory dept, the entire customer service dept, and the entire orders dept for the country.

So, the two other folks in the office with me are the Financial Controller, a family-mom type, friendly and good to work with... and the national Sales Manager, who I have silently dubbed 'Captain Creepy'.

Up until yesterday, Captain Creepy and I had an odd, but neutral relationship. I don't report to him (my boss and the entire chain of command I reply to are in New Jersey) thank god, and he has a totally different set of responsibilities, so there wasn't much to talk about. He doesn't say hi when he comes in, nor does he when he leaves for the day (but that's not that strange in and of itself). He's on the phone almost all the time, and usually closes his door/sits with his back to the hall/otherwise avoid contact with anyone in the office complex.

The oddest thing so far had been the crooked fake grin permanently graven into his face. You know, the kind of grin that nobody but a sociopath thinks is sincere. I mean, the Joker's smile has more warmth in it. It's like some kind of twisted poker face was violently imposed on him by an industrial accident. Certainly it has no bearing on his actual emotional or mental state, which is nearly unreadable and fairly unsettling. Every conversation with this guy was the living definition of awkward. Like talking to a man with an IQ of 78 who was trying to condescend so as to pass for the social worker minding the retards and not vice versa. Like a paedophilic uncle who you're safe from because he's not attracted to you personally. It was bad, but as I had little contact with him (and he is often away for trips to local markets), it wasn't that bad. Mostly it was slightly depressing because, hey, when your office population is so small, that usually results in a tight-knight group.

And then things got WIERDER.

As mentioned, Captain Creepy goes on trips often. The previous week, SEVERAL PEOPLE had mentioned he'd be away in Montreal this week. This was for work, not personal. Well over a dozen people knew where he was going - and I might well have even been expected to know where he was.

So yesterday he came into the office quite late. I assumed he'd gone for Montreal that morning. When he came in I though "Hey, maybe his flight was cancelled, that would suck" (there had been a snowstorm that morning), so I asked him if his flight had been cancelled etc. Just a friendly inquiry. He just blanked. His face would have been a mass of confusion if it wasn't for that artificial smile glued on. He deadpanned 'no' (all with that crooked smile) and then just sat there boring a hole into my forehead with his eyes for 30 seconds. I mumbled something about "oh good then" and wandered back to my office. Later I talked to one of the other employees to mentioned he would be there on Wednesday. Ha! Silly me! That was why! I had the wrong day! No wonder he was confused! Aha ha ha, what a faux pas.

That evening, on my way out of the office, I pause in front of his office door to wish him a good trip tomorrow and I got the following venomed reply (frozen bizarro grin still firmly affixed):

"You know Matt, I don't tell anybody where I'm going - not even my wife. When you ask me where I'm going, you sound like my Mother. You don't want to be my Mother."

Yes, exactly that. Word for word.

So with an idiot's cheerful grin I reply "Okay! You got it! See you!" and leave as fast as I can without running. I swear I was expecting him to pull a knife out his drawer and start fingering it. Certainly I suspect this man's mother is buried under a porch somewhere... but her voice carries on, if you get my drift.

Now, I'm not too worried. He's a spindly, late-middle-aged guy. And on the work side of things, he has made ZERO friends in my department. My manager hates him and my Director hates him because he keeps flaking out or dodging work. But still... CAPTAIN CREEPY.



*Which is actually a child of the Granddaddy company in France... that's right, I work for a Canadian subsidiary of an American subsidiary of a French company.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 14, 2009, 06:27:30 PM
Addendum:

IM conversation after I told the same story to a friend:

Quote
Friend: that's epic
  Me: OKAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYY
  Me: YOU DON'T WANT TO BE MY MOTHER
  Me: "NO, NO I DON'T ACTUALLY."
  Me: "REALLY!"
  Friend: or maybe you won't like him when he's angry
  Friend: he's either the anorexic hulk or norman bates
  Me: Like, this trip is NOT A SECRET AT ALL.
  Me: Also, I like the "I don't tell my wife where I go" line
  Friend: he's MI6
  Friend: lolol
  Me: "I'll be away on business this week... sometime."
"Oh? When will you be back honey?"
"Fuck you bitch!"
  Friend: LOL
  Me: BIZARRO LAND
  Friend: does his wife even know he has a job
  Me: LAWL
  Me: HAY I'M ON WELFARE R SUMTHING
  Friend: maybe she's just been forbidden from asking about the disappearances
  Me: Haha
  Me: Maybe he tells her he works for MI6
  Friend: Don't ask me about my business, Kate
  Friend: I'd like to be a fake secret agent
  Me: That would be pretty awesome
  Me: If it seems like you're leading a shifty double-life... it's because you are!
  Friend: YEAH
  Me: The exact flavour may not be what you sold... but hey you're a secret agent, anything you say is suspect anyway!
  Me: perfect!
  Friend: lol
  Friend: the ultimate cover
  Me: MY LIFE IS A LIE
  Me: O WAI~
  Friend: "seriously, I AM a secret agent"
  Friend: "ok right whatever"
  Friend: *spies with impunity*
  Me: The next scene has the guy in ragged clothes, panhandling
  Me: With a cardboard sign
  Me: "I AM A SPY"
  Me: "please give generously"
  Friend: fyi I am a spy
 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on January 16, 2009, 05:20:20 PM
So, okay.  I started work at this company as it's expanded its IT department -- well, expanded its IT department in ARIZONA, anyway.  It used to have IT all over the country, but now there are only two shops serving the entire company.

So they're in the process of expanding the work area and the warehouse space to deal with the increase in work and hardware.

The upshot of this is that the other temp and I spent yesterday moving pallets of computers and related equipment and putting them on new shelves.  The boss is out of town this week and one of the other workers said this was his top priority and he'd want to see the warehouse cleared out when he got back.

We had it pretty close yesterday -- at least, the stuff that had been out in the middle of the floor was put away.  There's a hell of a lot left to do, but our warehouse space was open for walking and moving stuff.

Then today we got a truckload of shit in.  Old PC's, old printers, and, worst of all, CRT monitors.  By 10 AM, everything was back to the way it had been before we started.  On the positive side, it gave me an opportunity to use the word "sisyphean".  On the negative side, we didn't think to take a picture BEFORE everything got fucked up again.

So, on what I'd been hoping would be a low-key Friday with minimal time spent in the warehouse, we instead wound up working harder than any other day this week.

I am very much looking forward to a three-day weekend.  Course, I haven't logged enough hours to actually get PAID for Monday, so that kinda sucks.

...but really, bitching aside, I think the bottom line is that, if they offer to hire me on full-time at the end of my contract, I'm going to be hard-pressed to say "no".  Yes, I'm doing grunt work, and no, it's not at all appropriate to my education, my experience, or my talents.  But the pay's fair, my coworkers are mostly nice guys, and, well, I have a job in this miserable damn economy.

And it's still better than my old job.  Not as mentally stimulating, but superior in pretty much every other way.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on January 16, 2009, 06:14:00 PM
I had to skip sleeping for a couple of nights to finish a job over New Year's.  No check in sight for that one, and the people I did it for are incommunicado.  They've still got the rest of the month according to the legalese on my invoice, but man am I done with this freelance shit.  Not that I can really go from freelance to full-time right about now.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on January 19, 2009, 07:49:56 PM
SCD's 24-day Workweek:  Day 1

This seems like it's going to be an adventure.  The team is going to be deployed in multiple places, and in between I will be spending some extra time deploying repeater sites all across the area.  While at first I was happy to be on salary, this may be just interesting. 

I'm alright with it, coming out of multiple teaching engagements where I seldom got a day off save an afternoon or a morning here or there. 

I'm interested in seeing how the other four people go.  One of them has recently been to the sandbox, but he isn't the brightest.  Two of them are retired, and the last dude - a keener, will most likely be my support when shit gets rocky.  The good news is that this way I save money. 

Food?  Home Heating?  Electricity?  I am certain to save bigtime for these things - enough to have a kickass party when the dust settles.  It's like they say: "Work Hard, Play hard"

Other highlights include flying in flying coffins, having more smoke grenades than I can possibly could throw in a day, misuse of government tobbogans, and a robbie burns day feast in a 5-man artic tent 1900m above sea level on a blustery, snowy eve. 

Today, nothing too interesting happened.  No one was around, so I played grease monkey, so I got to spot the individual issues with the antiquated, yet beloved two and a half tonne trucks I use. 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 19, 2009, 08:46:09 PM
flying in flying coffins

Everyone's perennial favourite, a Sea King (fuck yeah, Seaking), or something even more insidious?

Given that about half of the aircraft in the possession of our armed forced probably qualifies as 'morbidly decript' - after about 20 hours of maintenance work, so I suppose it doesn't really matter what you're flying in.

:mikey:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on January 19, 2009, 09:10:50 PM
...also, I forgot to mention that when we finally finished getting all the shit out of the truck and I was on my way back to the office to sit back and take a break, the doorbell rang because UPS was there to drop off MORE shit.

My reaction went something like this:

(DOORBELL)
"Really?"
(DOORBELL)
"REALLY?"
(DOORBELL)
"REALLY?!"
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Alex on January 19, 2009, 11:10:27 PM
So I picked up a new job at a different gas station (Flying J, so it's more of travel plaza) since I walked out of my last job because the district manager was a douchebag.

"okay hey alex i know you have some permanent leg damage but i need you to work from now (November 22nd) until December 17th with new days off come on you dont need your leg anyway"

And somehow I'm getting paid $11 an hour!?  WHAT?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on January 20, 2009, 05:38:39 PM
...another truck today.

And we're out of shrink wrap, which really limits our options for stacking monitors and such.  We thought we'd gotten some in, but it turned out to be cellophane.  One of the other guys had some unkind words to say about our purchaser.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on January 25, 2009, 03:27:40 PM
"okay hey alex i know you have some permanent leg damage but i need you to work from now (November 22nd) until December 17th with new days off come on you dont need your leg anyway"

What's the difference between a new day and an old day?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Alex on January 25, 2009, 06:53:46 PM
It was a typo for 'no days'.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on January 28, 2009, 11:46:14 PM
Day 9:

My overall contract's one third over. 

Having a bit of a 'vacation' this working weekend and a couple days.  I'll be leading a two-man alpine helidropped detachment - the one I've been looking forward to.  Got fucked over on many things, the lessons I gave last year were outright ignored, and my overlords seem more content with micromanaging and restricting what I can and cannot bring, despite already being passed down a weight and volume restriction. 

That's alright.  Hiding a 0,6kw generator for the radios, and using a couple custom LED-strips I made the over the holidays for lighting versus the CO-emitting lantern 24-7. 

Another supervisor wants to pull me off what I'm doing while I'm prepping for tasks that have no relevance to any of my positions.  I'm pretty much ignoring him now with the "smile, nod and acknowledge" routine. 

In the last couple days, I also found another summer instructing position from april to sept.  I've also re-enrolled for university in a city far far away. 

Weather for this weekend looks pretty ugly.  Rain far below the alpine line.  I suspect I'll have very low visibility.  Will not be bringing camera, or novely goggles.  Will try for ski goggles or alpine sunglasses. 


Spent previous weekend teaching/attending refresh classes in a metropolitan garrison.  Spent mornings sweeping frost.  Spent afternoons revising lessons.  Spent evenings at bar with computer scientist friend.  Mocked people for the concept of sweeping frost and ate much fancy ethnic food.  Woke up at 5am on both mornings. 


Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on January 29, 2009, 04:45:58 PM
Work's been pretty fucking nuts.  As previously established, it's an IT job on paper but a warehouse job in practice.  And every time we get shit sorted, another truck comes in to dump more fucking CRT monitors for us to inventory and stack.

Today a truck came in unexpectedly.  During a mandatory meeting.  So it was just me, the other temp, and the driver unpacking an entire truckload of shit.  It took until lunch.

I'd brought my lunch in a bag but decided fuck it, I was going to treat myself at the local burrito joint.  I got in my car and turned the radio on; NPR was talking to people who had just lost their jobs.  I had a good gallows laugh as that brought everything into perspective.

The truth is I've got job security.  There is way the fuck more work than the current permanent staff can do; the boss has authorized them all to do 20 hours of overtime a week for the near future.  That's evidence enough that he's probably going to hire us when our contracts are up.

When we got back from lunch he told us apologetically that he hadn't known the truck was coming, and also asked if we could pull down some overtime if he arranged it, with the caveat that they give a lot of money to the temp agency and his company might not approve time and a half because of that -- all of which is further evidence that he's looking forward to being able to hire us on without the agency taking its cut.

Topping that off, one of the other guys told us later that the boss has requested permission to hire MORE temps, since there's more work than we can do by ourselves.

So, yeah.  Pretty crummy job some days, but it looks pretty secure at this point.  To the point that the other temp and I both announced we were leaving ten minutes early today, rather than ask permission.  We'd done all we could for the day; no sense sitting around on our thumbs for ten minutes and pretending to work.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on January 29, 2009, 04:51:28 PM
One of the things I miss about Square QA is that I could fuck off whenever I wanted and nobody would blink.  Of course that had a lot to do with the job being redundant by nature and them paying the hiring company a lot more by the hour than they paid me.  It sounds like they might actually miss you if you disappeared, though.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on January 29, 2009, 06:13:28 PM
"Oh, and just before you leave tomorrow, you'll want to find some space in your tobbaggan for fifty smoke grenades"

...I don't know what I plan to do with them, but the mountain's going to look like the frakking cat in the hat by the time I step off..
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 30, 2009, 03:57:16 PM
Wow, I'm so fucked.

So, backstory: Over the past three months, the company decided to have no fewer than three major events take place simultaneously: 1 - Take over the distribution operations for all of Canada from a third party (this is how I got my job), 2 - Introduce an entirely new database system, imposed on us from the parent company in France (to conform with international ISO certification), and 3 - do Financial year-end.

Well at every stage of this process, the estimates of time and labour involved were cut as desperately razor-thin as possible. There was literally no room for error. Well guess what? If you said "That's retarded", you're right!

And it looks like in the three-way fight, Canada is losing HUGE. As of this typing, the Database is due to go live monday. This is irreversible.

The database has not been uploaded with any Canadian account information other than name and address (there is a LOT MORE than just that), we have NO PRICING on file, the Canadian tax rates have not been properly configured, the freight charges have not been configured, and every single account is marked as being assigned to a one particular sales rep (even the other sales rep's presonal accounts... LOL!), so that in theory all sales commissions would go to this one person.

This has ben a joke. We service 200 hospitals and the entire Canadian computer system is MY CREAKY LAPTOP. I only even received an account profile for the new database on wednesday.

As if that isn't enough, the first part of the transition was so fucked that just about every invoice we sent out billed customers double or triple what they were supposed to pay. AWWWW YEAH!

And I have 4 days training. My god, if I wasn't such a quick study, I have no clue what they would be doing. God knows there are gaps in my knowledge as it is.

I mean, almost none of this is my fault, and nobody is blaming me (yet), but the Canada takeover was the CEO's pet project so, uh... HILARITY. And somehow the Canadian operation is losing every single fight for time and resources (this is almost certainly because we're small potatoes compared to the US operation). Absolutely everything that's going wrong, is - and I have to depend on people who are already drowning (or who don't care) to save me. Good luck with THAT... most of the internal emails I send get no reply.

Maybe I'm not to blame, but I *AM* responsible - and at the epicentre of this clusterfuck.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on January 31, 2009, 10:31:18 AM
So are you just drawn to operations built on sand, Mongrel? It sounds like your job's about as secure as the Canadian border.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 31, 2009, 05:10:41 PM
You know, I get very depressed whenever I realize that the people in charge are grossly dumber than I am, because really... I'm not too fucking bright.

That said, it's still heaps better than my last job. Garden variety laziness and shortsighted idiocy is pretty run of the mill, really. And it's a hell of a lot better than being in a place that operates on pretension and LOCO WEED.


...


43k a year, my own office, and a boss who's in another country also help to soften the blow. I just worry they're mismanaging this SO BADLY that a: I'll SOMEHOW get blamed for not working hard enough, or b: they actually fuck this up so badly that the Canadian operations fold.

B is obviously more serious and less likely, but MAN, you could sure fool me into thinking they're trying.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 02, 2009, 05:29:38 PM
HEY GUYS!

GUESS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN THE COMPUTER SYSTEM THAT RUNS YOUR ENTIRE NATIONAL DATABASE AND ORDERING SYSTEM IS ON A RICKETY LAPTOP OF INDETERMINATE AGE?


WOO WOO MOTHERFUCKERS!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on February 02, 2009, 06:04:18 PM
Your entire database is picked up and carried off by the Hamburglar?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 02, 2009, 06:18:47 PM
Perhaps I should have added the line "And then your motherboard fries itself."

 :nyoro~n: :perfect: :THATWAY: :wat: :ohshi~: :facepalm: :pimp: :dance: :8D: ::D: :goodnews: :cake: :glee: :smile: :itsmagic: :imagination: :attn: :kowhyee: :suave: :nyah: :hurr: :derp: :wakka: :8V: :whoops: :nosir: :negative: :;-(: :humpf: :fukit: :fuckyou: :khaaan: :enraged: :MENDOZAAAAA: :over9000: :goggles: :endit: :painful: :;_;: :?: :gasp: :pop: :OoO: :scanners:

 :gameover:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Dooly on February 02, 2009, 06:29:20 PM
Those are an awful lot of stages of grief.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 02, 2009, 06:51:57 PM
Well, it's not my grief.

Unless perhaps you meant that I griefed someone. Because what I did today at 5 pm was fax 60 pages of work that I had no way of doing to the New Jersey office with a note that basically said "Okay kids, have fun!"

You can't plan your way out of a paper bag? Fine. You'll just have to deal with the consequences. The shitty thing is that the folks who have to clean the mess aren't the ones who caused it. But you know, that's the way it always goes.

I'm just sick and tired of calling people to apologise for how utterly incompetant we are.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on February 02, 2009, 08:19:52 PM
I'm back. 

The helicopters bailed on us at the last minute.  Turns out they won't go in the rain or the snow, or that the pilot this year was a pussy compared to the "been there done everything, a la crop duster pilot in ID4" pilot I had last year.  We didn't know until two hours later, so we went with plan B:  Snowmobiles!

So I learned how to snowmobile, then I did it in backcountry subalpine logging trails with grades of up to 15% up to speeds of 70 kph. 

It was worth it, as the new location that we went for had lakeside views and was so far away from anybody that sillyness was on.  Once we were set up, I threw on my peruvian alpine hat, and set up a late xmas tree with glowsticks which marked the firefighting equipment at the base. 

There were major clusterfuck bits that made it almost as stressful as IM's deal. 


Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on February 02, 2009, 11:23:09 PM
"been there done everything, a la crop duster pilot in ID4"

What, even up an alien mothership's asshole?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 03, 2009, 04:29:08 AM
I just remembered something else that's hilarious: It's been three months and the IT Department still can't get the 1-800-customer service line to route to my phone. Instead it goes to a virtual inbox where messages are emailed to me in .wav format.

So I don't actually take calls, I just play phone tag all day. And now that I have no access to my email anymore...
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 03, 2009, 07:24:52 PM
The good news: My computer is fixed now.

The bad news: My computer is fixed now.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on February 05, 2009, 07:40:57 AM
So now I have to drop every fucking thing, including the next seven projects in line, and redo this.

Project was a month late, but I finished it with about 75% of the requirements.  Wrote up a very nice looking manual, passed it off for testing.

Client may not even end up using product, may want to use 3rd party vendor product that he was looking at back when we discussed requirements.

There is no image emoticon that can express my rage.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on February 05, 2009, 09:14:53 AM
Hey, you got paid.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Zaratustra on February 05, 2009, 09:43:30 AM
The boss told me "If I see you on the internet one more time I'm going to cut your internet and I'm only saying it once"
why not cut it right now then
also he complains my documentation is too ambiguous
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on February 05, 2009, 10:10:33 AM
The boss told me "If I see you on the internet one more time I'm going to cut your internet and I'm only saying it once"

Are you at work and on the internet right now?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on February 05, 2009, 02:41:50 PM
...I guess he was.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 05, 2009, 07:26:04 PM
Hey, you could always be like us: So incompetant we're endangering lives.

Granted, for that to actually happen, some extreme circumstances would have to come into play, but considering our Ontario sales rep basically spent the week begging for spare stuff from one hospital and personally driving it to another, rinse, repeat multiple times until you go stark raving... well.

After my computer was fixed, a raft of other issues came to light. To put it in a nutshell: When they did the Giant Database Upgrade '09, they basically didn't code a single goddamn thing for the Canadian server, so literally nothing left for days - and that was after we'd already had to sit on orders for half a week for the changeover.

And the only person who can fix everything is my boss. She's become the ultimate bottleneck ANYTHING that needs to be fixed has to be done by her - she's the only person the database people showed how to do it. I spend my days literally begging people in the New Jersey office to go annoy her, because she's so massively overworked right now that she forwards her phone to voicemail, doesn't check her messages and snaps at anyone who comes near her office.

Today it took me half the day just to beat my way through and have them fix a single-line tag error that was preventing the largest customer in the country from getting any orders correctly.

Just once I would like to enter a simple fucking order - should take ten minutes at most - without runing into some massive technical failure.

Just once I would like to take a phone call, without having two messages in my voicemail by the time the call's over.

This shit is actually happening. Jesus FUCK.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 06, 2009, 07:17:20 PM
Hey, you could always be like us: So incompetant we're endangering lives.

Granted, for that to actually happen, some extreme circumstances would have to come into play, but...

Hey, remember when I said this? 

I din't think it was possible, but we managed it. TODAY WAS EVEN MORE FUN-ER-ER :8V:

ALSO: GUESS WHO HAS TO WORK WEEKENDS NOW. Not "your work days have shifted" no, it's "Oh my God we're fucked!"
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on February 06, 2009, 10:38:48 PM
...Fridays at my job are not very Fridayish.

There are business meetings on Thursdays, and they stress everybody out.

Near as I can tell, there's a lot of acrimony against our branch from some of the other branches -- see, the company used to have multiple IT departments throughout the country, and now we're one of only two.

What this translates to is that a lot of the people we support are people who just saw a bunch of their coworkers get laid off and their jobs given to us.  And who, incidentally, are used to being able to take their computer into the next room when they have a problem with it and now have to ship it out-of-state.

As you might expect, there is some friction.

None of which affects me directly (except that I'm one of two guys sifting through all the truckloads of shit we keep getting in from all the other closed IT departments), but the boss is stressed out and the guys I work with are stressed out.

...incidentally, I have decided that if I tell any stories in the future of the two guys I sit near, I will refer to them as Michael and Samir.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on February 07, 2009, 02:37:15 AM
 :nyoro~n:

Corporate Accounts Payable, Nina speaking...JUST a moment!
Corporate Accounts Payable, Nina speaking...JUST a moment!
Corporate Accounts Payable, Nina speaking...JUST a moment!
Corporate Accounts Payable, Nina speaking...JUST a moment!
Corporate Accounts Payable, Nina speaking...JUST a moment!
Corporate Accounts Payable, Nina speaking...JUST a moment!
Corporate Accounts Payable, Nina speaking...JUST a moment!
Corporate Accounts Payable, Nina speaking...JUST a moment!
Corporate Accounts Payable, Nina speaking...JUST a moment!
Corporate Accounts Payable, Nina speaking...JUST a moment!
Corporate Accounts Payable, Nina speaking...JUST a moment!
Corporate Accounts Payable, Nina speaking...JUST a moment!
Corporate Accounts Payable, Nina speaking...JUST a moment!
Corporate Accounts Payable, Nina speaking...JUST a moment!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Doom on February 08, 2009, 03:30:27 PM
I am a Toys R Us Electronics employee. We began our Shaymin distribution week today.

I will not receive my Shaymin this week. Perhaps not ever.

It's not because I forgot my DS today. I didn't want to drive back on my own time just for a Shaymin anyways.

I was doing what I always do ever since Dickhead Manager decided to throw me out of electronics: Ignoring him and doing the work that needed to be done. As soon as the one guy in electronics gets overwhelmed, I sweep in and begin gracefully cutting the workload down.

I like the distribution events. They're very easy to handle. You just smile at kids and tell them which menu options to pick, and they look at you like you've given them a solid gold bar.

But one little girl was not delighted. She told us she had gotten the Shaymin, accepted it from the delivery man at the Pokemart, and forgotten to save her game. She had actually powered the DS off and now had recorded data of Shaymin being received, but no Shaymin to show for it.

Nintendo is absolutely batshit insane against letting anybody, anywhere, anytime abuse their little Event things. All these little cut-offs are to keep you from downloading multiple Shaymin, or to simply trade them away one by one, or some other stupid thing.

She was only gone for a few minutes, leaving after I suggested that she would need to trade with another downloader and only if they'd give their Shaymin to her. She returned with her mother, and I was suddenly seized by a burning resolve in my soul!

I would use my lunch break to drive back to my house, retrieve my own DS, drive back, download Shaymin, and trade it to her.

And I did. I used 31 minutes of my 30 minute lunch, downloaded Shaymin, and waited 15 minutes for them to return.

She was thrilled. Her mom said it was her little girl was on the verge of tears when she praised me in talking to my manager(a good manager, too. Cool Mom Manager.) My manager let me take a 20 minute on-the-clock break later to eat. :nyoro~n:

And that, my friends, is why it's Team Fancy. We've got a lot of class.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on February 08, 2009, 03:32:45 PM
Doom is credit to team!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lady Duke on February 08, 2009, 04:29:18 PM
Dude.  That's terrible.  That dumb little girl deserved to lose it if she's too stupid to save.  Also....I can't think of a way that what you just explained could happen.  My favorite thing to do, in fact, is to turn off the DS once I receive an event pokemon if I don't like it's nature.  So I believe you got screwed out of shaymin and that little girl got TWO shaymin.

I'd give you my extra shaymin, but it's spoken for by Dohl.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on February 09, 2009, 12:27:01 AM
I'm back in town again for the night.

Things got awfully in-depth last week, and I found myself in various rain forest areas, as well as an open compound beside an elementary school.  Almost every kid tried to gain my attention through shouting and attempting to climb the nearby fence.  Yard attendants made sure they didn't succeed with their childish shenanigans. 

I made sure to smile and acknowledge every shy child who quietly waved to me in the hopes of giving them a confidence boost rather than all the loud ones who shouted "do you have a gun/grenade/rocket launcher?" 

I'm home for the night and the tough stuff is over with.  I've got the stench of diesel that won't go away, and my first instinct when I returned was to go for a 40 of whiskey and down half of it.  I'm still drunk as all fuck (I started boozing 12 hours ago and have downed a 12 pack and a 40..), but I rise in six and get back at it, in town for four more days before my countless day week is finally over and I can have a real "honest-to-god" day to myself. 

The upside is that I learned a lot about myself, my limits (yet again), plus I met two of my successful recruits from last summer.  One of them had a fond memory where at the final 1-week trench exercise of myself. 

It was an exercise where not only did they learn how to defend, build defenses and understand the discipline of when to shoot, and why, but also learn how to patrol and be part of section and platoon-level assaults.  The last night is where they get overwhelmed by nonstop raids - for a whole 18 hours.  During this exercise, the instructors would shed their instructor persona and become section commanders and second in command - myself with the lowly 2 - I/C position being as a newbie to the leadership gig I was at the time - and we would lead within the trench lines, patrol lines as soldiers would normally do. 

During a lull in the firefight, I had a private bomb up my magazines as well as his own, and I took the chance to throw some shitload of instant coffee in my canteen cup with some water, heated by a fuel tablet in a hole in the ground. 

I made sure to pass it around to the people in my group within the section.

And this guy remembered the moment when the world seemed to be collapsing on him, and the guy who had been reaming on him the entire go quietly passed him hot liquid on a cool, mosquito-laden night of an awful god-damned black beverage that, despite it's horrible acidic taste, managed to boost his spirits to the point where he remembers six months later..

He tells the story to his friends. 

Among other stories involving scrapes, burns, hornet stings, one-liners and other quotes...

It was a boost in confidence. 

Now if only I could have a proper night at the bar to make use of it.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 10, 2009, 06:09:06 PM
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!


(post made sensible by Det.  It was slowing down people's browsers)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on February 10, 2009, 08:03:45 PM
Something vexes thee?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 10, 2009, 09:04:06 PM
Plz note thread title, thanx.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on February 12, 2009, 05:25:00 PM
This was the last day of my 24-day workweek.  It's over..

Here's hoping I never have to do that again, unless I actually have honest responsibilities and consequences should I fail in my tasks...

In an unrelated note, I'm now slated for teaching young soldats again this summer!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 17, 2009, 04:25:21 PM
Today's update:

They're moving me to a windowless room that's about as bright an cheery as a broom closet. Actually, if it wasn't for the office door, I'd have sworn up and down that it was a storage room.

Also, they're bringing in someone new at an unspecified future date. given what I know about the company, I get get spend the next six months in unanswerable terror, unsure if I will be scapedgoated and replaced in payment for the giant clusterfuck that the Canadian operation has become.

Just zo long as ze CEO 'as someone to blame, eh?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on February 19, 2009, 06:43:21 AM
...incidentally, I have decided that if I tell any stories in the future of the two guys I sit near, I will refer to them as Michael and Samir.

I am working on rounding out my cast.  There's another guy who I think makes a good Tom to match the Office Space theme; one of my coworkers is a dead ringer for House and another looks like Huey Freeman.

I am debating whether to refer to the religious kid as Flanders.  It fits for the religious part but not the 21 years old and thinks he has the world figured out part.

He came in yesterday wearing a Real Men Love Jesus shirt.  Huey and House did not care for it.  The kid countered, "Hey, I'll wear what I want and you wear what you want.  I'll wear Real Men Love Jesus, and if you want you can wear a shirt that says Real Men Love Beer."  (He doesn't drink.)

I responded, "How about a shirt that says Jesus Really Loves Beer?"

Now I want to make a shirt that says that.

I've seen shirts around with Ben Franklin's "Beer is proof God loves us and wants us to be happy" quote on it, which I would also like to wear, but I think I'd have to make one because for fuck's sake I'm not going to pay $20 for a T-shirt.

Penny Arcade's Jesus shirts would also be appropriate, but they only come in black and, as I've noted before, black shirts get entirely too damned hot in the summer for me to own very many of them.

Tangentially related: my first year of college, we had a very religious neighbor who had a Real Men Love Jesus bumper sticker on his shitty car that he had to push to get out of its parking space.  We used to joke that real cars go in reverse.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Doom on February 19, 2009, 06:59:18 PM
The biggest asshole at my workplace is going off-site to work for four months.

 :perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 23, 2009, 05:14:06 PM
My boss is reaching the point where she only send me 2-word replies, or if I'm less lucky, none at all. This is a problem when she's the only person in the company who can fix a lot of the fucked-up shit we're all wallowing in.

On the funnier side: I fucked up an order last week (not entirely my fault, but mostly, yeah) and there was a meeting scheduled so I could take my lumps.

She rescheduled the meeting no less than five times today, until it fell off the end of the workday and was rescheduled for tomorrow. Honestly, I find that more hilarious than anything. That woman desperately needs to admit she can't do all this shit and needs help but she just can't bring herself to do it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on February 23, 2009, 06:04:42 PM
I wonder if she's more terrified of asking a man for help, or asking a woman for help.

I wonder what I'd find more terrifying. :nyoro~n:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 23, 2009, 07:07:13 PM
I think it's more a control issue than a gender one. She's one of those people who's always gotten ahead by just. Working. HARDER.

The problem with that attitude in in the the way that it's rewarded.

But hey, all MY requests are legit, well-documented, and critical to our operations. She doesn't want to do it, NOT MY PROBLEM.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on February 26, 2009, 09:38:43 AM
Anybody live in San Diego who wants to let me use their address sos I can get work in San Diego?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 27, 2009, 10:17:15 PM
Today was kind of funny at work. I was there for 13 hours. Why?

Me a week and a half ago: Hey manager, we need to get X set up for all this shit for monday. Half of the entire province of British Columbia will be mad at us if we don't get these orders out.

Manager: Lalalalalalala I can't hear you.

Me: ...

Me on monday: Hey this shit isn't done yet. Can we get this going so maybe I can send these today? Shipments to the ass-ends of the Western Cordilliera have to go early in the week or not at all.

Manager: [vague reply]

Me: ...

Me on tuesday: Is it done yet?

Manager: No. [actual reply! No comment, no "It'll get done later", just 'not yet']

Me on wednesday, etc.: [You get the idea]

Finally, friday afternoon rolls around. The national sales manager is wondering what the fuck is going on, and the BC account rep has been bouncing off walls for three days. At 3:15 pm my manager FINALLY FIXES THE ACCOUNTS SO I CAN SEND ORDERS. Ohheythesearenowaweeklateandhavetogothismonday.

Manager: So you're gonna come in this weekend to do this right? I'll OK the extra hours!

Me:  :facepalm:

So I just stayed late instead.

At this point, I can say without any hyperbole at all, that I cannot think of a single major client in the entire country that we have not managed to piss off. THE ENTIRE NATION OF CANADA IS MAD AT US RIGHT NOW. OW QUIT IT.

Oh and as an added bonus, a FedEx plane carrying an irreplaceable medical shipment for a Montreal client did a belly flop on landing at the airport this morning. I had to spend an hour making arrangements for off-hours delivery, but amusingly enough we actually got the freight. Today even!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on March 01, 2009, 08:40:05 PM
(http://i191.photobucket.com/albums/z284/Nikumatic/002-1.jpg)

I think eventually, they're going to stop letting me do the marquee.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 02, 2009, 04:07:29 AM
It's like those online "LOL MAKE UR OWN SIGN" image generators... only IT'S REAL.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 03, 2009, 07:32:42 AM
On the funnier side: I fucked up an order last week (not entirely my fault, but mostly, yeah) and there was a meeting scheduled so I could take my lumps.

She rescheduled the meeting no less than five times today, until it fell off the end of the workday and was rescheduled for tomorrow. Honestly, I find that more hilarious than anything.

This meeting has now been re-scheduled almost every day (sometimes twice in a day) to the point where it was just re-scheduled again for this friday.

Even if it doesn't get re-re-re-scheduled again, it will now have been delayed for over two weeks.

:lol:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on March 04, 2009, 04:18:48 PM
The use of Advice dog back at the office is gold.  Gold.


Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on March 04, 2009, 05:32:19 PM
I should start shooting Daily Reminders With Advice Dog around the office.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 06, 2009, 12:39:48 PM
On the funnier side: I fucked up an order last week (not entirely my fault, but mostly, yeah) and there was a meeting scheduled so I could take my lumps.

She rescheduled the meeting no less than five times today, until it fell off the end of the workday and was rescheduled for tomorrow. Honestly, I find that more hilarious than anything.

This meeting has now been re-scheduled almost every day (sometimes twice in a day) to the point where it was just re-scheduled again for this friday.

Even if it doesn't get re-re-re-scheduled again, it will now have been delayed for over two weeks.

:lol:

Slowly, sloooowwwwwly... the meeting has grown little legs and creeps ever-closer to five pm.

It's like hands-off whack-a-mole at glacial speed.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: The Artist Formerly Known As Yoji on March 06, 2009, 01:38:51 PM
Uh...SolidWorks claims that these two parts are concentrically aligned by the circled holes. Reloading the assembly did nothing, either.

:wat: :facepalm: :sadpanda: (http://i101.photobucket.com/albums/m78/yoji_00/sob.jpg?t=1236375251)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 06, 2009, 03:07:45 PM
It actually happened!

Sum total of meeting: My boss telling me repeatedly to stop doing something that I had already stopped doing after she told me to stop doing it three weeks ago.

:8V:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 06, 2009, 03:11:49 PM
I also reaaaaally need to stop staying for an hour past the end of the time I actually get paid to be here.  I can technically claim overtime for that, but for obvious reasons I've only done so a couple of times. :facepalm:

Though it was funny as hell to read that our department has already gone over the overtime budget for the whole year.

 :richiam:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 10, 2009, 02:33:43 PM
You know what I'm starting to think would be a good investment?  A soundboard.  The only thing I'd put on it is the failure tune from The Price is Right, but I'd hit it at the end of every ridiculously stupid bug from a previous developer I have to report to my clients.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ytCEuuW2_A
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on March 10, 2009, 02:56:14 PM
I have that on my phone.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 10, 2009, 03:20:16 PM
Did you use it on customers back at 411?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on March 10, 2009, 03:32:06 PM
Yes. Along with rickrolling.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on March 10, 2009, 03:45:12 PM
I can rickroll people on demand with my cellphone as well.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 10, 2009, 04:09:38 PM
Holy shit, I take it back.  I take it all back.

If I had to do that for this new site I'd need like twenty soundboards wired together, all playing in unison.

Possibly round-robin style.  On repeat.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on March 10, 2009, 04:29:10 PM
:nyoro~n: The opening to megaman 2 sounds pretty cool played in a round.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 10, 2009, 06:55:33 PM
I have that on my phone.

For some reason that tune fragment is burned into my skull. Along with the Family Feud Theme and Dixie.

SEND HELP.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 10, 2009, 06:59:04 PM
Today was hilarious.

Computer died again. Windows corrupted (missing kernel).

I call IT: "You're going to have to send us the computer" (reminder: they are in New Jersey)

Me: "... ah... can't you just, you know, send me a Windows disk or recovery disk?"

IT: "Well, then we'd have to give you the admin password to your machine."

Keep in mind the fact that if my computer is working, IT can remote-zombie it anyway.

 :facepalm:

On the other hand I get to spend the next four or five business days hanging around the office, taking the occasional call and sending all my work to the NJ location. Mostly I'm just going to hang around and (hopefully) draw. Luckily, I had just cleared a ton of shit on Monday and today was very quiet.

WAY TO GO GUYS. YOU WIN AGAIN!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on March 11, 2009, 08:47:04 AM
I feel bad for the safety team/department in various industries, and the absurd safety precautions they have to tell you about for OSHA compliance.  When I was working for a goverment contractor, I recall seeing stuff kind of like this (http://thedailywtf.com/Articles/An-Office-Safety-PSA.aspx) coming from them. [via dailyWTF]
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on March 11, 2009, 09:04:23 AM
Shop supervisor's at one of those meetings THIS VERY MINUTE. :D
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: jsnlxndrlv on March 13, 2009, 05:50:49 PM
Fired yesterday.  It hit home today.

If I can't keep a job at fucking Walmart, I need to turn my life around.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rosencrantz on March 13, 2009, 05:54:50 PM
You probably just weren't old or disabled enough.

(My condolences, man.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kazz on March 13, 2009, 06:31:06 PM
Did they give you a reason, or were you just too competent?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: jsnlxndrlv on March 13, 2009, 06:38:31 PM
Absenteeism.  Clocking in late four times is equivalent to a single absence; I'd accumulated the equivalent of eight absences over the last six months.  Then, last week, I wrote my schedule down wrong and didn't show up on a day I'd been scheduled to work.

 :gameover:

This sucks, but it's entirely my own fault.  And at least now I don't have an excuse to not be submitting applications for non-Walmart employment.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on March 13, 2009, 08:00:22 PM
If it makes you feel any better, during a lull in my life, I got canned out of a Sbux for similar reasons, and skipping a meeting devoted to showing stuff that people should buy that's not coffee. 

Made me redouble my efforts towards the military, and now before I head back to school (again), I will be an instructor for a journeyman sig course followed by a two month stint during the hottest of the summer days of Ontario in a air-conditioned lab. 

Life has a funny way of throwing curves at you.  This whole background of economic doom and gloom is certainly another one. 

I hope you'll keep your chin up and find somewhere else - someone not demeaning as Bal Mart.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on March 15, 2009, 07:43:57 AM
...you know, it's learning what you people do for a living that sometimes makes me feel bad for taking my job for granted.  Especially with the political climate as it is.  I really hope that I get picked up for follow-on work for Quantico if they decide not to deliver the second increment of aircraft...
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 20, 2009, 05:23:52 PM
And then Valve was all like "You get an achievement for UBERCHARGING TWO GUYS AT ONCE!"

:whoops:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: jsnlxndrlv on March 20, 2009, 05:25:48 PM
Looks like I'm (maybe) reemployed, as a "mortgage facilitator".  This is technically just another name for collections agent.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 20, 2009, 05:27:27 PM
Is... is Newbie breaking kneecaps for a living now?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: jsnlxndrlv on March 20, 2009, 05:34:06 PM
Hey, it doesn't have to come to that.  You pay your debt, your kneecap gets to stay right where it is, and everybody's happy.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 20, 2009, 05:41:35 PM
Awesome.  We can now hold it over SA that we have an actual, real-life goon.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on March 20, 2009, 06:08:30 PM
I am forever unloved. :sadpanda:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Dooly on March 22, 2009, 11:00:48 PM
You're going to have people shooting at you, dude.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rosencrantz on March 25, 2009, 10:53:42 AM
So, uh, my new part-time job is pretty great and all, but today (just before I got to work) an old man shit his pants and now the entire office reeks. The bosses sent me out to get a bunch of deodorizers and disinfectants, but now it smells like vaguely flowery shit in here.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 25, 2009, 11:02:37 AM
So, uh, my new part-time job is pretty great and all, but today (just before I got to work) an old man shit his pants and now the entire office reeks. The bosses sent me out to get a bunch of deodorizers and disinfectants, but now it smells like vaguely flowery shit in here.

Where on EARTH are you working?

Also, 'human odour' (be it BO or... other things) combined with cheap deoderizers or scents is one of the most sickening smells on the planet.

NO YOU STUPID FAT FUCK. FEBREEZE IS NOT AN ALTERNATIVE TO BATHING. AGHAHAHGAGAGAGAHQripawhua
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rosencrantz on March 25, 2009, 11:06:59 AM
Where on EARTH are you working?

County Veteran's Affairs office. Old people coming in and out all day.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 25, 2009, 11:11:15 AM
Ah.

Speaking of work, things are surprisingly... okay right now!

We still lurch from crisis to crisis but even though I'm newer than most folks, they keep coming to me, because I'm the only person who answers their emails, bothers to be friendly, explains things, finds out what's going on, or gets shits done.

Also my workload has gotten much lighter partly because of a mysterious decrease in overall volume, but also because SOME things are finally working properly.  

Hell, Captain Creepy is still, uh creepy. But he's been a pretty good ally. Basically, he's still the same, his speech and mannerisms not revealing anything about his emotional or mental state, but at least some of the time he's friendly and helpful in his actions, so that's a net gain.

The only downside is they finally figured out how to get the remote network working, so my boss can finally watch my calls and times from the head office, but for the most part I can work around that, preserving my rather 'carefree' attitude.

... All this means is that I am probably due to get massively fucked in some terrible way soon.  :perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on March 25, 2009, 11:24:38 AM
The other night we had a customer come down from the midnight movie with the complaint "I am just trying to watch The Dark Crystal, and the lady in front of me will not stop farting."

After a few bewildered "what"s I managed to realize he was both serious and he genuinely wanted us to do something about it (perhaps pull her aside and tell her to make her colon stop), but the best we could do was give him and his friends some free passes because seriously, what the fuck do you do in that situation?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lady Duke on March 25, 2009, 11:36:24 AM
You show the Dark Crystal at your movie theatre? :3
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on March 25, 2009, 11:55:25 AM
We did last weekend!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on March 25, 2009, 11:55:33 AM
and some chick kept farting
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 25, 2009, 12:47:41 PM
Dear Sir,

In your professional opinion, would you say the expectoration (hereinto described as a 'fart'), could best be categorized as a 'poot', 'fweep', 'blat', 'flrrppp', 'pfft', or basso profundo?

Regards,

An interested party,
Brig. KBE, OG (retired), mrs.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on March 25, 2009, 01:08:06 PM
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

fuck prosecutors.  fuck them with hammers.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Arc on March 25, 2009, 01:16:00 PM
(http://i437.photobucket.com/albums/qq100/lonewolf3878/edgeworth-confidentb.gif)
Is that a promise, or a threat?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 26, 2009, 01:03:35 PM
This is pretty funny.

We had a problem with the phone queue today. A very simple one, where a poorly designed interface caused a bit of confusion. I figured out what happened right away but my manager couldn't understand when I tried to explain.

I had to play dumb just to let her figure it out on her own. Not because it was a pride issue, but because that was the only way I could make her understand what had happened.

Amusements!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 28, 2009, 03:08:10 PM
Let's talk about hardware.

There is nothing that pisses me off more than seeing a piece of hardware that comes back with a sticky on it that says "Broken", "Doesn't work", "Bad" or some other worthless fucking thing.  You know what that tells me?  It tells me you thought of yourself and put a note on your thing so that you wouldn't accidentally try to use it again, but you didn't think of the techs back at the depot who would eventually have to figure out what the fuck is actually wrong with the thing beyond "Broken".  How the fuck hard would it be to write "Won't power on", you ASSHOLE?

Oh, and hey, if you're sending us an ENTIRE PALLET of monitors that won't power on, how about including a note that says "None of these monitors power on"?  That would have sure saved me the trouble of testing every single one of the fucking things!

On the plus side, at least somebody knows how to pack fucking monitors on a pallet.  We keep getting them just thrown on loosely, which inevitably means they get the shit knocked out of them and are scratched to hell by the time they reach us.  Fun fact: warranties cover hardware defects but not scratches.

So at least, out of an entire pallet of poorly-labeled bad monitors, only one was actually scratched.  So that's good.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on March 30, 2009, 07:45:25 PM
Let's talk about hardware.

There is nothing that pisses me off more than seeing a piece of hardware that comes back with a sticky on it that says "Broken", "Doesn't work", "Bad" or some other worthless fucking thing. 

This is my world, only with large metal things that, by all rights, SHOULDN'T be in the air.

There's this one pilot who seems to take some perverse pleasure in writing gripes that sum up to "Thing didn't work."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 31, 2009, 08:17:53 AM
So uh enjoy your stimulus, regular paycheck people.  I'll just be over here shuffling through my $4K of unpaid invoices.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 31, 2009, 11:56:16 AM
So uh enjoy your stimulus, regular paycheck people.  I'll just be over here shuffling through my $4K of unpaid invoices.

Is this going to come to kneecapping?

Please say you're going to have to Tonya Harding them.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on March 31, 2009, 12:16:07 PM
I am something of a thug. Do you need any thug assistance?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 31, 2009, 01:29:55 PM
Possibly, "I'm going to have to Tonya Harding them.", and yes.

Though I much prefer goons, and even the occasional mug.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 01, 2009, 04:04:45 PM
Oh yeah, today was pretty funny.

I have a cold. I went in and did most of my work and then decided to take a half-day off. I don't get a lot of calls (it's faxes more than anything - I get maybe 15-25 calls a day) and was thinking that oen afternoon won't be that bad and that I'd probably just have a couple calls in my voicemail in the morning. If that.

I called my manager (down in New Jersey) to let her know. The following hilarious conversation took place. Keep in mind the fact that I am the Order Desk, Customer Service, and a variety of other things for all of Canada:

Me: "Yeah, I'm going to leave at 12:30."
Her: "Ah, uh, okay. Hey is [The National Sales Manager] there?"
Me: "Uh, no... he's in Montreal. Why, what did you need?"
Her: "Uh, well, I was thinking maybe he could cover the phone while you're out."
Me: "...."

Hey, maybe he KINDA HAS BETTER THINGS TO DO? Maybe he also HAS NO CLUE HOW TO DO THIS JOB BECAUSE IT'S NOT EVEN REMOTELY HIS RESPONSIBILITY?

Her: "Hey can you just wait there for a few minutes?"
Me: "Uh, I guess so?"
*click*
minutes pass, she calls me back. Give me instructions for my voicemail message. Also adds this gem:
Her: "Yeah, you know I was just talking with [her boss] about this yesterday, that we have no one to cover for you. I mean, you're gonna want to go on vacation at some point." 

At that point all I could do is laugh. I mean really, come on.

Not that anyone familiar with our company should be the least bit surprised that we had no contingency plan for [whatever... hell anything] at this point.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 02, 2009, 05:34:07 AM
Sometimes I think you took that job just so you'd have stories to tell.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on April 03, 2009, 03:59:59 PM
Alright, so, a member of my family works for the government. Today, she went to some sort of, uh, I'm not sure what it was, some sort of fair/expo for office supply and software companies to show their stuff, and her pass was paid for by her employer. Anyway, she participated in a raffle and won a brand new printer for her office. That's good timing because the one they have right now is old and busted and way overdue for replacement.

However, her bosses apparently think it's too much trouble and paperwork to just accept a free printer, so they told her to take it home and keep it.

On one hand,  :facepalm:.

On the other hand, there's a brand new 800$ commercial-grade behemoth of a laser printer sitting on the kitchen floor right now.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on April 03, 2009, 05:30:06 PM
Is it big enough to live in?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on April 04, 2009, 06:01:08 AM
Nah, that would be too awesome, at least then it would be useful. As it stands it would need to be about half its current size to fit on any furniture we have. ::(:

We're thinking about selling it, but we'd pretty much need to find a local business that needs and is willing to buy a no-warranty, no-service printer from an individual in this economy.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 04, 2009, 07:57:23 AM
Nah, that would be too awesome, at least then it would be useful. As it stands it would need to be about half its current size to fit on any furniture we have. ::(:

We're thinking about selling it, but we'd pretty much need to find a local business that needs and is willing to buy a no-warranty, no-service printer from an individual in this economy.

If it's worth $800, you should be able to get $300 and maybe even $600 for it. That's nothing to sneeze at.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on April 04, 2009, 10:44:21 AM
...I'm trying to determine exactly what point I started living in a fucking sitcom.

:pimp:: I hate the car the insurance company gave me after my Corvette got wrecked.  The leather seats are too hard!
:thad:: ...my entire car cost four thousand dollars.
:itsmagic:: My car smells like cat pee.
:thad:: Yeah, dude, you gotta roll those windows up.
:itsmagic:: I would if I had any.
:goodnews:: Bad news, everyone!
:thad:: Uh-oh.
:goodnews:: Remember when I told you there were some bigwigs coming in on the 13th and we had to clean up the warehouse?
:thad:: Yeah.  We've been working pretty hard at it; I think we'll have it done by next week.
:goodnews:: They rescheduled.  We need to have it done by tomorrow.
:thad:: ... ... ...okay.  Let's go, gu --
(THAD'S STOMACH GURGLES)
:thad:: OH GOD WHY DID I EAT THAT FALAFEL LAST NIGHT

-----

:wat:: NEXT TIME: Thad's dating FOUR DIFFERENT GIRLS in the same week!
:thad:: How will I fuck this up and wind up sad and lonely again?
(LAUGHTRACK)
:thad:: Tune in next week!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 04, 2009, 05:22:49 PM
Holy shit, I actually got paid.

:victory:

I mean, I got it on 6PM on a Saturday, so I'll be sitting on a largish check for the rest of the weekend, but it beats the fuck out of the alternative which at least partially involved the IRS and what I can only assume is a gubernatorial branding iron.  Say what you want about this semi-employment gig, but it's at least thrilling.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on April 05, 2009, 04:09:58 AM
A company I work for has a glitch in their e-mail system that sends my project updates to the wrong e-mail address. Turns out three of my previous clients have been waiting for urgent bugfixes.

I don't get paid for bugfixes.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 05, 2009, 10:44:22 AM
...why not?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on April 06, 2009, 02:43:19 AM
I work on a quote, so more work on one project doesn't earn any more money.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 06, 2009, 03:13:02 AM
I saw it as 'service for product is included with the purchase price of that product, where service is necessitated by design flaws', like a manufacturer's warranty.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 15, 2009, 09:57:02 AM
Heh. Small amusments that I forgot to post earlier. So, up here in Canada, we get Good Friday off as a public holiday (also, monday is an additional holiday for public servants, banks etc.). I understand that many folks down in the US don't get Easter off as a designated holiday, so we notfied the parent company in New Jersey. Actually, I personally sent an email, to our warehouse manager, our director and, may manager two weeks prior, explaining it so that nothing was shipped for arrival while everything was closed.

On monday, I was checking my emails and noticed this gem from my manager, sent 9:15 Friday morning: "IT'S 9:15 WHY ARE YOU NOT LOGGED IN YET?"

 :lol:

Oh and also:

"Circle The Wagons" is not some kind of all-purpose catchphrase that is always relevant to the discussion through some kind of... MAGICAL TURN-OF-PHRASE SHAPESHIFTER GRAMMARIAN MAGIC.

GODAMMIT BILL, WOULD YOU STOP THAT?!?

 :enraged:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on April 15, 2009, 09:21:17 PM
Hey guys, today's high is 69 degrees!

Let's turn on the SWAMP COOLERS!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 16, 2009, 08:08:37 AM
ah you fucks

cant you see im trying to drive you off in order to stay off my wrist

stop agreeing to my unreasonable estimates
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on April 16, 2009, 09:52:59 AM
Get some ice Brentai. Or hire a coding bitch for the day to just do all of the typing you tell him to.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on April 16, 2009, 10:12:05 AM
Yeah, freelance work would be so much easier without all these clients.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 16, 2009, 10:24:48 AM
if only i did not like pyos
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rosencrantz on April 16, 2009, 10:36:35 AM
So I just got to work and was given a task that previous employees have been tasked with but ignored for too long. Now everyone is pissed that it wasn't done years ago and it's up to me to finally do it or else.

Anyway, I was filing through these thousands and thousands of pages of old military records, when I found an ancient-looking set of papers. Turns out they are the the separation papers of a guy who left the US Army in 1918.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 16, 2009, 10:43:56 AM
hee hee 69
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 16, 2009, 10:57:22 AM
hee hee 69

Non-sequitur, what.

... Either your work provides you with benefits not normally accorded to 9-5 employees or... I really, have no ide- NO, REALLY, WHERE THE HELL DID THAT COME FROM?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Fortinbras on April 16, 2009, 10:58:36 AM

... Either your work provides you with benefits not normally accorded to 9-5 employees or...

if this is the case please put in a good word for me please
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 16, 2009, 11:03:31 AM
Hey guys, today's high is 69 degrees!

Let's turn on the SWAMP COOLERS!

thanks for making me have to murder a joke yall
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Fortinbras on April 16, 2009, 11:06:58 AM
god damned pagebreaks, i tell you.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 16, 2009, 11:07:15 AM
Hey guys, today's high is 69 degrees!

Let's turn on the SWAMP COOLERS!

thanks for making me have to murder a joke yall

Friends don't let friends not use the quote button.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on April 16, 2009, 11:27:21 AM
There now is a possibility I might become a recruiter.  School-age children, watch out!


Actually, it's not that bad a job, at least compared to these guys (http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1889152,00.html) :ohshi~:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 16, 2009, 12:46:49 PM
Quote
"I'll never forget sitting there at Sergeant Flores' memorial service with my husband and seeing his wife crying," Amanda recalls.  Amanda recalls. "I remember looking over at Patrick and going, 'Why did he do this to her? Why did he do this to his children?' " Patrick didn't say anything, and Amanda now says Flores' suicide "triggered" something in her husband. Six weeks later, Patrick hanged himself with a dog chain in their backyard shed.

Dick.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 20, 2009, 05:55:53 AM
Jesus Christ, when the hell are they going to restart our work server?

I've been getting "please restart to finish your update!" pop-up messages through my remote link to our work server for a full week now. Messages, that I can't do anything about.

Every. Five. Minutes.

Everytime I ask IT, they say they're going to be restarting the server "tonight". Hell, they had all fucking weekend and here we are, monday morning and I'm still getting the damned things. AUGH.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on April 20, 2009, 06:23:10 AM
You need to be more assertive about these things.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 20, 2009, 06:38:59 AM
You need to be more assertive about these things.

Is emailing the head of IT assertive enough? Because I've done that.

And yes, I asked the lower rungs first. They've already copped the "I don't have authority to restart the server so ask the director" line. You better beleive I know how to 'go though the motions'.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on April 20, 2009, 07:07:46 AM
At this point, I would consider having your process well documented in case people ask why you are going out on so many coffee breaks.  Spring is coming and the blossoms are out, after all.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 21, 2009, 09:53:34 AM
Man, it is just DEAD here. I think I've processed maybe fifteen orders, tops, in two days.

No complaints!  :perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 21, 2009, 05:32:44 PM
Just got off of work delivering pizzas.
I took four deliveries the whole night meaning I didn't get much gas money.
And I only made five cents in tips total meaning EVERYONE I DELIVERED TO IS A PRICK.

That is just rude.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 21, 2009, 05:54:51 PM
Deliver to me once and I'll give you a 6000% raise.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on April 21, 2009, 06:21:51 PM
I don't understand people who don't tip delivery guys. What the heck, people.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on April 21, 2009, 06:22:23 PM
And I only made five cents in tips total meaning EVERYONE I DELIVERED TO IS A PRICK.

Did one person give you a nickel, or was it a few people who gave you like 1-2 cents?

I can't tell which of these possibilities is the lamest.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 21, 2009, 06:28:58 PM
House 1 - One penny. He said "Keep the change"
House 3 - 2 pennies. Because I had no change to give him.
House 5 - One penny.
House 6 - One penny. Fucking wrote a CHECK
House 7 - One penny.  FUCKING WROTE IT ON THE CREDIT CARD SLIP

EDIT: And yes... I kept notes. I usually do.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Doom on April 21, 2009, 06:36:01 PM
If those houses are close enough, torch the fucking neighborhood. Nothing of value will be lost.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 21, 2009, 06:43:29 PM
Sounds good. Find me a way to torch a town full of brick houses with a nickel.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 21, 2009, 07:11:49 PM
I took four deliveries the whole night meaning I didn't get much gas money.

House 1 - One penny. He said "Keep the change"
House 3 - 2 pennies. Because I had no change to give him.
House 5 - One penny.
House 6 - One penny. Fucking wrote a CHECK
House 7 - One penny.  FUCKING WROTE IT ON THE CREDIT CARD SLIP

:wat:

Unless by deliveries you mean each stack, in which case... oh.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 21, 2009, 07:25:24 PM
No. I take doubles and triples when I leave. So I leave with a few different orders and get paid less. That is what I meant. Sorry to be confusing!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on April 21, 2009, 10:18:43 PM
Man, it is just DEAD here.

I watched eight episodes of Battlestar Galactica at work today.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on April 21, 2009, 10:29:13 PM
I've been at my job six months. I've watched The entire Avatar series, Toradora!, One Piece from about Ep. 200-present (minus craptastic filler), How I Met Your Mother, Dollhouse, bits and pieces of 30 Rock and the last season of Battlestar Galactica. Not to mention most episodes of The Daily Show, Colbert Report, Conan, and even Jimmy Fallon, with the occasional Leno thrown in. Oh, and a few random movies and podcasts.

It's a fucklame job, but it's got some sweet downtime.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 21, 2009, 10:31:44 PM
Hmm.

On the one hand, I can fuck off and watch cartoons whenever I want.  On the other hand, I'd lose enough money watching one disc of Avatar to buy the whole damn series.

And of course there's the third hand, which is that some days it's not going to make a damn bit of difference either way.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 22, 2009, 03:05:44 AM
Man, it is just DEAD here.

I watched eight episodes of Battlestar Galactica at work today.

On the movie screen?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on April 22, 2009, 07:28:19 AM
Sadly, no.  :(
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 23, 2009, 10:19:13 AM
Today I got a voice mail from one of our sales reps.

She paused in the middle of the voicemail to take another call. "Blahblahblah... Hold on Matt, I've got a call on the other line... *inordinate pause* ...okay! Blahblahblah...".

...

ಠ_ಠ
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on April 25, 2009, 03:32:19 PM
I've been getting "please restart to finish your update!" pop-up messages through my remote link to our work server for a full week now. Messages, that I can't do anything about.

Every. Five. Minutes.

This is one of the most legitimately fucking obnoxious things about Windows.  OSX has a "don't ask me again" checkbox on its reboot prompt, which beats the fuck out of kicking me out of The Witcher every 15 minutes just in case I've changed my mind.

I think I've stated before that pretty much EVERY popup should have a "Don't show this again" checkbox.

I don't understand people who don't tip delivery guys. What the heck, people.

I tip less if there's a delivery charge.  Which there pretty much seems to be everywhere now, presumably due to the $4+/gallon gas prices of last summer.

On the one hand, I can fuck off and watch cartoons whenever I want.  On the other hand, I'd lose enough money watching one disc of Avatar to buy the whole damn series.

I haven't worked this gig long enough to get sick days.

The other day I stayed home with a migraine; it cost me over $100.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on April 25, 2009, 11:00:19 PM
I've been getting "please restart to finish your update!" pop-up messages through my remote link to our work server for a full week now. Messages, that I can't do anything about.

Every. Five. Minutes.

This is one of the most legitimately fucking obnoxious things about Windows.  OSX has a "don't ask me again" checkbox on its reboot prompt, which beats the fuck out of kicking me out of The Witcher every 15 minutes just in case I've changed my mind.

The trick is to not close the box. As long as you don't close it it will never try to reopen or force focus on itself. I slide it mostly off the screen so it's out of the way, and it doesn't stay on top of full screen programs.

It's still obnoxious though.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 26, 2009, 06:47:39 AM
I've been getting "please restart to finish your update!" pop-up messages through my remote link to our work server for a full week now. Messages, that I can't do anything about.

Every. Five. Minutes.

This is one of the most legitimately fucking obnoxious things about Windows.  OSX has a "don't ask me again" checkbox on its reboot prompt, which beats the fuck out of kicking me out of The Witcher every 15 minutes just in case I've changed my mind.

I think I've stated before that pretty much EVERY popup should have a "Don't show this again" checkbox.

It was still doing as of Friday afternoon. They STILL hadn't restarted the server. How hard is that?

I am willing to bet good money that I will go in on Monday only to see THREE weekends will have passed without the damn thing being fixed.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 28, 2009, 05:56:41 AM
I've been getting "please restart to finish your update!" pop-up messages through my remote link to our work server for a full week now. Messages, that I can't do anything about.

Every. Five. Minutes.

This is one of the most legitimately fucking obnoxious things about Windows.  OSX has a "don't ask me again" checkbox on its reboot prompt, which beats the fuck out of kicking me out of The Witcher every 15 minutes just in case I've changed my mind.

I think I've stated before that pretty much EVERY popup should have a "Don't show this again" checkbox.

It was still doing as of Friday afternoon. They STILL hadn't restarted the server. How hard is that?

I am willing to bet good money that I will go in on Monday only to see THREE weekends will have passed without the damn thing being fixed.

Turns out I was wrong.

THANK GOD.  BLESSED RELIEF :happy:



Also: Why does my social dynamic at work always always turn into "Get along famously with everyone at work... except my boss."

 :facepalm:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 28, 2009, 10:08:32 PM
Well, I put in my two weeks the other day, Friday I believe, as I am moving in 3 weeks.
I didn't work again until today so I didn't bother to check the schedule. I went in and they sent me home right away since we had no business and I was only scheduled for 2 hours anyway. I head towards the back of the store to check my schedule and they said "Oh. You are not on the schedule for the next two weeks." Oh? This seems a bit odd. Maybe they forgot that I was- "And turn in your shirt before you get your next paycheck, alright?"

Oh. Oooooooh. Great. Now I am unemployed. That's fantastic.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on April 28, 2009, 10:34:23 PM
hope you weren't planning on two weeks of fat pay!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 29, 2009, 03:08:17 AM
Yeah, it's really dirty, but I learned long ago not to give notice at shitty minimum-wage and minimum-wage-esque places, because they WILL just fuck you out of your last two weeks.

Whereas at professional places, I tend to give a month's notice or more if I can, so I can properly train my replacement.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 29, 2009, 08:37:27 AM
I never had that problem since most of my previous shit jobs spent my notice period begging me to stay (except the QA one, where I simply quit by repeatedly declining to sign up for the next project).  Of course at those places I was honestly trying to get out of there as fast as possible, so the dead duck period was usually a chore for me and more often than not I went out quietly sabotaging shit by the end.

People like me are probably why they don't want you hanging around for the next two weeks.  Sorry about that.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on April 29, 2009, 08:11:07 PM
...So Conspiracy Theory Guy's been out for a week and a half.

He comes in Monday and tells everyone he went to Mexico and got swine flu.

After he leaves, two of the guys freak the hell out about how he shouldn't be at work if he's got swine flu.  I remind them that this is the guy who recently lectured me on how Saddam smuggled the WMD's to Syria, as evidenced by the abandoned trucks full of gold that somehow never made it onto the news.

Yesterday, Samir comes in wearing a surgical mask.  Not as a joke, not ironically; he gets totally pissy when I make fun of him for it.  Samir, unlike the character I have named him after, is a big imposing dude, which makes this all the funnier.

But now I've had to deal with him being edgy for two days and it's not really funny anymore.

Also, today he said he'd heard on the radio that the CIA started the outbreak to distract attention from the torture memo story.

So apparently we've got insane conspiracy nuts at BOTH ends of the political spectrum!

(I, on the other hand, was once called out for being a conspiracy theorist for suggesting that Coolio was never really mad at Weird Al and the whole thing was just a PR stunt.  Because THAT is just crazy talk.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 30, 2009, 02:59:58 AM
Thad, I want to work at your office.... to troll these people.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 30, 2009, 04:24:26 AM
...So Conspiracy Theory Guy's been out for a week and a half.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g27ekxWaA30


I didn't know he had a job.


Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on April 30, 2009, 10:45:05 AM
 :nyoro~n: When presented with that evidence, he could conceivably have several.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 30, 2009, 11:01:03 AM
Man oh man.

I like how anytime something is retarded I justify a request for higher service levels with "that's how the Canadian market works".

Like, the inventory dept just DOESN'T GIVE ME BACK ORDER DATES. On MEDICAL REAGENTS. Seriously, what the fuck is this unbelieveable shit? So a hospital calls us up and something is on back order and they ask "when is it coming in?" and my response is supposed to be "DurrHurr, I don't know!"? Are you kidding me? How is this acceptable?

So then I just go "Well, Canadian hospitals expect backorder dates."

Of course, that specific example is a poor one, because our inventory dept really IS retarded, so I still don't get back order dates. But it's worked elsewhere.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 30, 2009, 11:52:43 AM
Tell 'em you've all got swine flu up there.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Fredward on May 04, 2009, 03:43:45 PM
I got a job! At a farm! For $10/hour!

Well, it could be worse.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on May 04, 2009, 06:40:59 PM
Are you slaughtering chickens?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Fredward on May 04, 2009, 06:57:39 PM
So far? Nope. Just packin' cucumbers.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on May 04, 2009, 06:58:58 PM
They pay you $10/hour to pack cucumbers?  I want that job.  Fuck sorting comic books.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 04, 2009, 07:58:05 PM
...

...


...

Hi.  I'm Brentai.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kazz on May 04, 2009, 09:01:52 PM
Constantine: I'll take your job if you take his.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Fredward on May 04, 2009, 09:07:38 PM
This is $10 Canadian per hour, you know. And, uh, that's only $2 up on minimum wage. ::(:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 05, 2009, 03:10:18 AM
This is $10 Canadian per hour, you know. And, uh, that's only $2 up on minimum wage. ::(:

In Ontario, that IS minimum wage. :whoops:










Okay, okay, so it's $9.20 right now and will be $10 next spring, details, details...
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on May 05, 2009, 04:10:29 AM
But don't the inflationary pressures of such a high minimum wage cause your economy to collapse, with the all the rich corporate owners abandoning their companies because of such outrageous labor prices and the cost of a loaf of bread shoots up to $25?

Tell me that's how it goes!  Because every American knowsis told that if we get big minimum wage increases the cost of living will skyrocket so much that America will become a desolate anarcho-wasteland where ghoulish morlocks feed on the corpses of the damned.

INFLATIONARY PRESSURES!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 05, 2009, 04:47:09 AM
Well, it ain't exactly New York, but Toronto is comparatively expensive. So a $10 minimum wage just brings up up to a bare minimum for the city.

Outside of Toronto it's actually kinda half-decent though.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 05, 2009, 08:24:05 AM
For frame of reference, that's $8.50 US.  Which is still higher than any minimum wage we have ($5.15 in Minnesota to $8.00 in California.  San Francisco actually has a citywide $9.79 minimum wage but it also has something like a $1000 minimum rent.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 05, 2009, 12:47:38 PM
Oh lovely.

So I need to ask for Thursday off to go a Funeral. Now, I don't mind that I have to use vacation time, because this person wasn't family, but could at least let me request that damn time?

I'm supposed to request time off using an arcane worksheet in our online hour logging system. Only... the button that creates the time off request sheet isn't there. I looked it up in the help, and in the training module, in case I missed it like a dumbass, and even called over another employee to look in case I was missing something blindingly obvious. No dice. It really isn't there.

So I emailed my mananger - even included a screenshot. She just ignores my email for hours. Eventually I poke her back asking if she still needs my request. She sends the cheery reply "Employees must filled out the form and it needs to be approved before time off is taken.". I was touched by her simple compassion.

So I tell the miserable cunt to read my earlier email, where I already (politely) explained that the DAMN THING DON'T WORK. Her subsequent reply is to forward my email to another employee, saying "Hi Xxxxxx,
Could you show Matt how to complete a time off request in EZ Labor; I don’t use that part of the application so I can’t help Matt."


...


Where's that animated .gif of Phoenix Wright Smashing his head into a wall when you really need it?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on May 05, 2009, 01:21:51 PM
If there was ever a sign to look for other work, I think this would be it. 


Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 05, 2009, 01:47:51 PM
Well, everyone else here is pretty decent.

She's not so much evil as she is an Asperger's retard. The kind that only reads the first two sentences of any email sent to her.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Fredward on May 05, 2009, 04:42:27 PM
I think I'm going to quit my farm job to work at Blockbuster because almost nobody at my workplace speaks more than a few words of English!  :perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on May 05, 2009, 05:30:20 PM
Whoa! You get paid to do an easy job and you don't have to do idle chit-chat with coworkers?

 :perfect:

Oh? You are going to quit? Huh
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on May 05, 2009, 05:55:31 PM
stick with it for a little while longer

buy an ipod

subscribe to podcasts

get paid forever in your own little private podcast shell
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 06, 2009, 10:35:47 AM
I thought this was funny enough to post verbatim (identifying items have of course been removed). Of course, my sense of humour may have been destroyed by hanging around in isolation in this airless, sunless box for weeks.

Quote
From: Matthew
Sent: Thursday, April 30, 2009 2:31 PM
To: [INVENTORY]
Cc: [MY MANAGER]
Subject: item xxxx

Hi [INVENTORY],

I just placed an order for the [CUSTOMER], account YYYYY, for one box of xxxxx, [order details].

They need this item quite soon (within a week if possible). I know the [category] products have been a problem due to customs issues, but can we please get a back order date to give to the customer by any chance?

Also, [MY MANAGER], I did not receive a back order warning on this item – I would not have known the item was on B/O if I had not checked availability for the customer beforehand in [system]. Just an FYI in case this has been coming up.

Thanks!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Last weeks responses here omitted - was not given a back order date, because inventory is awesome like that. [MY MANAGER] also explained why system did not warn me we were out of the item.

Quote
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Matthew
Sent: Wednesday, May 06, 2009 11:43 AM
To: [INVENTORY]
Cc: [MY MANAGER]
Subject: RE: item xxxxx

Hello [INVENTORY],

Would we happen to have an update on this item yet? The customer is inquiring as to what the back order date will be.

Thanks!

- Matt

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[INVENTORY] replies and tells me it's in customs, i.e. it has almost arrived. IN THEORY, the email chain should end here.

Quote
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [MY MANAGER]
Sent: Wednesday, May 06, 2009 1:36 PM
To: Matthew
Subject: RE: item xxxxx

Matt:

I had explained this to you last week; if there is a past due open Purchase Order for this item, you will not get the message insufficient quantity.  When in doubt, and after entering all order lines you need to [blah blah blah system stuff]

[MY MANAGER]

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Matthew
Sent: Wednesday, May 06, 2009 1:42 PM
To: [MY MANAGER]
Subject: RE: item xxxxx

Hi [MY MANAGER],

The customer already knows the item is on back order (they were informed at the time of the order) and was asking for a confirmed arrival date as we did not have one at the time. Hence my question to [INVENTORY].

[INVENTORY] has already replied to my question today and let me know the item is in customs clearance. I informed the customer and they were happy with the update.

I am not certain why the past due notification is being referred to. You are correct that that question was already addressed last week.

Thanks.

- Matt

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: [MY MANAGER]
Sent: Wednesday, May 06, 2009 1:55 PM
To: Matthew
Subject: RE: item xxxxx

The past due Purchase Order ([INVENTORY]’s open purchase orders for reagent purchasing from France) is calculated in the ATP; Available to Promise.  If a past due one exists you will not see a message during order entry that there is insufficient quantity as the system.

[MY MANAGER]

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Matthew
Sent: Wednesday, May 06, 2009 2:05 PM
To: [MY MANAGER]
Subject: RE: item xxxxx

Yes, I understood that, you explained this last week. Thank you.

Perhaps I created some confusion by forwarding the same email I sent last week. It had two questions: The question you addressed and a request for an approximate delivery date on the item itself.

I was only seeking an update on the second part, which [INVENTORY] has kindly provided.

Thanks.

She declined to reply after that.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 08, 2009, 09:05:16 PM
$5.15 in Minnesota

Erm, federal minimum wage (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Minimum_wage_in_the_United_States) has been $6.55 since last July, which sort of throws the rest of your data into question.

...working tomorrow.  OT will be nice.  Hoping I can buy that monitor one of these days.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on May 08, 2009, 10:35:51 PM
(http://i191.photobucket.com/albums/z284/Nikumatic/alien.jpg)

I need to decide what to do for Terminator.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on May 08, 2009, 10:54:16 PM
I cannot profess my love for you in words.

Oh, right.

 :wuv:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on May 08, 2009, 11:09:26 PM
Niku you are wonderful.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 09, 2009, 06:44:30 AM
IT IS A PERFECTLY CROMULENT MOVIE
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on May 09, 2009, 01:49:43 PM
Quote
I need to decide what to do for Terminator.

TERMINATOR
SEE THIS MOVIE IF YOU WANT TO LIVE
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 09, 2009, 01:53:18 PM
TERMINATOR
ONLY THE PARTS WHERE ARNOLD IS NAKED
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 09, 2009, 02:00:35 PM
Also I guess I should do this.

$5.15 in Minnesota

Erm, federal minimum wage (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Minimum_wage_in_the_United_States) has been $6.55 since last July, which sort of throws the rest of your data into question.

No it does not.  Take a look at that color-coded map on the page you linked and find Minnesota on it.

Quote from: http://www.dol.gov/esa/minwage/america.htm
Minnesota Minimum Wage Rates

Large employer (enterprise with annual receipts of $625,000 or more)
$6.15

Small employer (enterprise with annual receipts of less than $625,000)
$5.25
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 09, 2009, 02:01:19 PM
Admittedly, I was 10 cents out of date.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 09, 2009, 04:48:49 PM
Quote from: http://www.dol.gov/esa/minwage/america.htm
Minnesota Minimum Wage Rates

Large employer (enterprise with annual receipts of $625,000 or more)
$6.15

Small employer (enterprise with annual receipts of less than $625,000)
$5.25

Take a look at [...] the page you linked

Quote from: http://www.dol.gov/esa/minwage/america.htm
Note: Where Federal and state law have different minimum wage rates, the higher standard applies.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 11, 2009, 12:47:52 PM
:derp: What's the status on the daughter windows?
:yarr: I haven't been given a link or a design for them yet.
:derp: Actually, we're still waiting for approval on the design.
:yarr:
:yarr: Okay.  That's the status of the daughter windows then.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on May 13, 2009, 06:36:42 PM
I had to put up a company message on the marquee this week.  Oh well.  :(

(http://i191.photobucket.com/albums/z284/Nikumatic/001.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on May 13, 2009, 07:28:35 PM
It still has a kind of double-meaning. Maybe some people will think you're hiring hitmen?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on May 13, 2009, 07:36:02 PM
Way to balance necessity and marquee humor.  :itsmagic:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on May 13, 2009, 11:08:53 PM
It still has a kind of double-meaning. Maybe some people will think you're hiring hitmen?

(http://i191.photobucket.com/albums/z284/Nikumatic/thats_the_joke.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on May 13, 2009, 11:10:18 PM
Niku continues to win all the prizes
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Alex on May 14, 2009, 01:55:45 AM
Quote from: http://www.dol.gov/esa/minwage/america.htm
Minnesota Minimum Wage Rates

Large employer (enterprise with annual receipts of $625,000 or more)
$6.15

Small employer (enterprise with annual receipts of less than $625,000)
$5.25

Take a look at [...] the page you linked

Quote from: http://www.dol.gov/esa/minwage/america.htm
Note: Where Federal and state law have different minimum wage rates, the higher standard applies.

It's disappointing to see that the minimum is the same as when I moved out of there, especially since the cost of living there jumped about $100 to $125.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 15, 2009, 01:23:11 PM
Heh, you know what makes your boss like you more? When you do the cleanup paperwork for an error made by your predecessor that cost the $20 000 for a simple data entry mistake.

It's nice to remind them that I'm not as bad as all that.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 19, 2009, 10:07:54 AM
LULZ for today:

Our network connection to the home server in NJ is a travesty. It's slow as dirt and on the worst days it takes as long as fourty-five minutes just to log in. I sent another email cc-ing various individuals to our IT department, which is cursed by a horrible "ignore it 'till it goes away" Director.

The lower peons (who are helpful and efficient - when they actually know what to fix), not knowing what to do forwarded it to the IT Director. The Director decided that he would basically blow us off by saying it was the responsibility of the landlords of our building to fix our network issue. To further hammer his point home, he added the CEO to the cc list on the email... only the CEO replied, telling him to do his damn job and actually fix the problem.

Hoist on his own petard!

 :perfect:

How sweet it is.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 20, 2009, 04:48:00 PM
It happens all the time but this is the first time I've actually met a client with the balls to actually tell me he was going to pay his invoice as late as he possibly can.  And here I was thinking I wouldn't have to coast for a few months on my last big check.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 25, 2009, 07:31:35 AM
So as bad as things were at the beginning of the year, we never actually had a situation where someone was saying straight up "I need [X] tomorrow or someone's going to die". Usually orders are far enough out that our screw-ups just made shipments tight. But this one isn't even our fault for a change.

Why did I have to get TWO calls like that on MEMORIAL DAY WHEN THE WAREHOUSE IS CLOSED AND EMPTY AND THE SHIPPING COMPANIES AREN'T PICKING UP ANYTHING ANYWAY. That's a rhetorical question. Canadians generally don't need to know about Memorial Day, much less make plans based on it's effects. It's just some really shitty cooincidental timing.

It's frustrating because of the two hospitals calling, the harder hit one is one I've repeatedly warned not to order shit at the dead last minute - but they always do.

Christ... the 'Just-in-time' distribution model was killed by September 11th. People are going to have to GET OVER IT and stop placing orders at the absolute last fucking minute and go back to carrying reserves. Yes storage costs money, we all get that, but the party is OVER, people.

(Before anyone asks, I've already done all I can on my end, arranging loans and shit... otherwise I'd hardly be posting on the boards).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on May 25, 2009, 08:00:27 AM
Yeah, that party of open borders was pretty damned sweet when it lasted..


Anything, anytime, anywhere.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 25, 2009, 02:54:11 PM
It's frustrating because of the two hospitals calling, the harder hit one is one I've repeatedly warned not to order shit at the dead last minute - but they always do.

Well, you know, their job is probably a lot like yours or mine -- there's more shit to be done than man-hours in a week to do it, and if they DID order on time, something else would have to give.

Or maybe it's like my job in that the person who does the ordering sits on her ass all day reading TMZ and looking at purses.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 25, 2009, 03:27:30 PM
Well, see, here's the thing. Think of it like a tank of gas.

You have a 'full' marker and an 'empty' marker. There's also that little area past the 'empty' marker, which  (for lack of a better term) we shall call the "OH FUCK OH FUCK OH FUCK" zone.

As long as you drive, you'll have to stop for gas sooner or later, and at somewhat regular intervals.

These are the idiots who don't fill up at the three-quarter mark, nor do they even do so when they hit the empty mark, no, these are the idiots who like to be in the zone.

It's just stupid because all you need to do is change your mental definition of just how much stock constitutes 'being low on gas'. 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 25, 2009, 03:43:54 PM
And to bring the analogy to its endpoint, the engine is powering somebody's pacemaker.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on May 29, 2009, 08:49:25 PM
Today I taught a Sikh about veggie dogs and burgers. He seemed really impressed by how they made them almost look like meat! Then he found out they had eggs in them and was like  :negative:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 30, 2009, 04:38:10 AM
The vegan ones had damn well better not have eggs in them.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on May 30, 2009, 08:27:50 AM
Some veggie burgers do. The ones you get at Lick's for example.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 30, 2009, 10:45:17 AM
I used to make those one this one line I worked on at a meat plant years ago. I can confirm that nothing earthly goes into those suckers.

They do however taste quite excellent for a vegetarian burger.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on May 30, 2009, 02:48:47 PM
Vegetarians I can understand--they don't want to eat aminals out of sympathy for fellow living creatures--but what's the deal with vegans? Do so many people have a moral objection to shearing sheep in the summer, or are they all buying into PETA's exaggerated claims about the welfare of livestock and the quality of farm produce?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ocksi on May 30, 2009, 03:18:53 PM
ever watched a cafo video?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Fortinbras on May 30, 2009, 03:32:33 PM
As I understand it battery egg laying chickens get literally vacuumed up at the end of their laying cycle and dumped en masse into an enormous Treehouse of Horror style spinning blade.  No kiddin'.  I don't really trust a packaged veggie burger to use free range eggs.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on May 30, 2009, 03:57:19 PM
Quote
they don't want to eat aminals out of sympathy for fellow living creatures

right, they eat plants instead

wait
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ocksi on May 31, 2009, 06:29:18 PM
There's something to be said for a CNS.

That said, even with no moral qualms about quality of life for your food animals, I'd recommend checking out the true costs of eggs (http://www.gourmet.com/foodpolitics/2009/04/egg-prices), for example.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: King Klown on May 31, 2009, 08:10:30 PM
I like how brown eggs sell for more, despite there being no difference between them and the white ones.

Wait.

 :racist:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on June 06, 2009, 04:39:40 PM
(http://i191.photobucket.com/albums/z284/Nikumatic/youcanbeonetoo.jpg)

goooooo planet
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on June 06, 2009, 06:22:58 PM
I don't understand how you keep doing this
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on June 06, 2009, 06:30:37 PM
It took me a second, but I got it.

Never stop.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Dooly on June 06, 2009, 10:39:20 PM
 :OoO: But, but, it turned out to be love.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on June 06, 2009, 10:40:55 PM
No it turned out to be Milla Jovovich's vagina.

so did resident evil.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 06, 2009, 10:45:26 PM
Everything is Milla Jovovich's vagina.

And David Bowie's cock.

At the same time.

The whole universe is basically David Bowie's genitals inside Milla Jovovich's.

I'm going to go get some more rum.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kazz on June 07, 2009, 08:42:29 AM
The only reason I know Milla Jovovich's name is because, a long time ago, I ran around finding the names of celebrities I thought were hot so that I could find naked pictures of them, and she was one of those celebrities.

Nowadays I am constantly bombarded with nudity, and I find out the names of celebrities I think are hot so that I can find pictures of them with their clothes on.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on June 07, 2009, 09:45:43 AM
YOU HAVE PASSED THE THRESHOLD INTO BECOMING A MAN OF TASTE AND CHARACTER
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on June 07, 2009, 10:06:13 AM
in b4 a picture of kazz's ass
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on June 07, 2009, 05:46:47 PM
YOU HAVE PASSED THE THRESHOLD INTO BECOMING A MAN OF TASTE AND CHARACTER

Hope you guessed his name
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 07, 2009, 05:52:27 PM
Ifnkvohgroghprm.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 07, 2009, 07:24:14 PM
YOU HAVE PASSED THE THRESHOLD INTO BECOMING A MAN OF TASTE AND CHARACTER

Hope you guessed his name

Hoo! Hoo!

Hoo! Hoo!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on June 08, 2009, 09:01:45 PM
(http://i191.photobucket.com/albums/z284/Nikumatic/durkadurkadurka.jpg)

Sometimes people rent one of our theater screens out for private events.   ::(:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 08, 2009, 09:02:41 PM
(http://pal2pal.com/BLOGEE/images/uploads/Flag_Salute.JPG)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on June 10, 2009, 04:24:09 AM
I go in to work this morning, and learn more about how the day's meetings with the HR people will go:

"Bring your badges, company credit cards, and all that stuff with you."

 ::(: ::(: ::(: :sadpanda:

My meeting's at 3:30.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Alex on June 10, 2009, 05:12:44 AM
This is why I always dread any kind of phone call from my places of employment.

They either want you to cover someone's shift or they're calling you in to fire you.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on June 10, 2009, 10:29:09 AM
The bad part is that I knew it was coming, what with the program cancellation.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on June 10, 2009, 10:41:31 AM
You get to keep the unfinished 'copter, right?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on June 10, 2009, 10:58:34 AM
If only.

It looks like our dream of Arc fastroping down to MAGFest with pyrotechnics and bare-chested women to do a face-melting guitar solo will never come to pass...

The dream is truly dead.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=94mmKl2_vwc (skip to 4:35)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on June 10, 2009, 12:08:03 PM
Any word on a severance package?


Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rosencrantz on June 10, 2009, 03:56:53 PM
I found out today that I'm not going to get paid for my last three weeks of work!  ::(:

I have a special veteran's only position where I'm able to do easy work for minimum wage (non-taxable), for a maximum of 25 hours per week. It's only available to veterans attending school, and our main priority is to do our homework and answer the phone and other simple office tasks if we're not busy with our schoolwork.

When I got the job, I was under the impression that I would not be able to work during the three weeks between the Spring semester and the Summer semester. However, as the Spring semester came to an end, my supervisor told me that I would be able to continue working and getting paid during the short vacation. She said that I just had to submit my new information and they would whip me up a new contract, which takes between one and three weeks, and I could just work in the meantime and send them my timesheet later. So of course I did this, and today the fucking main Veteran Affairs office finally responds to me and says that no, I cannot get paid.

I'm not extremely pissed about this - it's easy work and since I wasn't in school at the time, I spent most of the time surfing the internet - but my supervisor basically promised me this money and I need every cent I can get for my wedding in August. We were just talking about how close we are cutting it with our budget, and now we're basically $600 shorter than we were yesterday.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on June 10, 2009, 04:21:27 PM
Verdict on my layoff:

I am officially on a "leave of absence" until August.

Until then, I get full pay and benefits as if I were still working, I just don't have to do anything.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on June 10, 2009, 04:29:08 PM
is there an emoticon for "i hate you"
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 10, 2009, 04:50:48 PM
is there an emoticon for "i hate you"

:fuckyou:

I think that one works well enough here.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on June 10, 2009, 05:20:59 PM
So, yay military-industrial complex?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on June 10, 2009, 11:33:13 PM
Verdict on my layoff:

I am officially on a "leave of absence" until August.

Until then, I get full pay and benefits as if I were still working, I just don't have to do anything.

Not bad.  I hope you're saving like mad.  Any plans for the future?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 10, 2009, 11:35:16 PM
An engineer with a military background can live like an American king in this economy.  I don't think he has to worry that much.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 11, 2009, 11:56:14 AM
Man, the National Sales Manager is weirding me out again.

Yesterday, we had a conference call with the US head office and he shelled and ate peanuts the whole time... but only doing it when he was talking. :wat:

Today he wandered into my office to ask about something. While he did so, he grabbed a long bamboo stick out of an ornamental 'office space potted plant' and started wildly whipping it around like a five year old kid who's just found himself a sword/swagger stick. I mean, he wasn't threatening or anything like that, it was just bizarre.

I mean, he's a good fellow and all, and has been helpful. But sumpin' jus' ain't right in that boy's haid.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 11, 2009, 12:10:20 PM
It sounds like he's just got some form of very mild schizophrenia, and is self-conscious about it.

...he'd be perfect for the WFE, in other words.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on June 11, 2009, 05:45:15 PM
Your boss is Tyler Durden?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 11, 2009, 09:04:45 PM
Only if Tyler Durden is 50+, white-haired and bald, with a mysterious divot in the top of his head.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 11, 2009, 09:16:49 PM
Tyler Durden is whatever you subconsciously want him to be.   :imagination:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 11, 2009, 11:10:03 PM
(Post deleted due to specific information which the client could possibly trip over.)

Long story short: I picked up my second IIS/ASP customer, and my first with a massive viral-hijack-phishing thing going on.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on June 12, 2009, 05:07:59 AM
Only if Tyler Durden is 50+, white-haired and bald, with a mysterious divot in the top of his head.

Ooooh, speaking of weird old dudes with misshapen heads, there's this guy who comes into the bakery for cookies (to bring you up to speed, the bakery at Sobeys has some cookies set aside to give to kids. It used to be called the Cookie Club, but nobody brings their card, so we don't bother asking). He rides in a motorized wheelchair and stinks of cigarettes, has eyes like Sartre (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_hCyqRkpdtLk/SSZqOu7baaI/AAAAAAAAAVQ/HjFYEOJS3mo/s400/sartre.jpg), and has maybe six teeth. He normally wears hats, but my co-worker, Jason, once saw some suspiciously symmetrical scars on his head. He hypothesized that the guy was a lobotomy patient.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 16, 2009, 06:20:13 AM
Heh. We're being GST* audited today by a federal revenue inspector.

The inspector is camping in my office for now. The funny thing is that the poor bastard actually looks like the cartoon sterotype of a Tax Man. He even has his glasses on a string.

For additional amusement, I was given specific orders to make him uncomfortable, but that's such foolishness. reminded me of that scene in Goodfellas:

Quote
...I always asked if they wanted coffee.
Some wives, used to curse at them and spit on the floor. On her own floor!
That never made any sense to me. It was better to be polite and call the lawyer.

*Federal Sales Tax
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 17, 2009, 12:06:47 PM
God... why is the only person at this company who hates me my manager. Everyone else thinks I'm grand. Or at least likes me enough to fake it profusely.

Just my luck to always be answerable to angry slow-witted schoolmarms.

:enraged:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Arc on June 17, 2009, 09:48:16 PM
Have you tried putting out?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 18, 2009, 03:15:59 AM
minus two points for failure to use advice dog.  :advice:


I'm not sure she likes men... or any gender. She's one of those workaholic Aspergers' spinsters who can't even manage to be an old cat lady because cats don't like her. Fucking her would probably be like fucking a splintery board.

Yesterday that woman accused me in writing of trying to subvert her authority. Today I'll find out just how stupid this is going to get.

Oh, and the company was supposed to pay a shipping bill for me months ago. Turns out they didn't, even though they told me they had, so now FedEx is going to ruin my credit rating unless those stupid oafs fix this. Luckily my manager is NOT responsible for that one, so I might actually get it fixed.

EDIT: ehhh... that's far too serious a reply, I know. But the bitch just ain't makin' me laugh right now.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Arc on June 18, 2009, 09:20:55 AM
Nope.

Bang Da Boss
:advice:
Hot Pockets
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 18, 2009, 09:44:13 AM
Hot pockets?

:jizz:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 22, 2009, 12:00:41 PM
Our network connection is so poor that today everybody I spoke over the networked phone line sounded like Max Headroom and everytime I try to do anything on the remote server, it is excruciatingly slow. It takes 5-15 seconds for keystrokes to register and the mouse was sometimes moving a pixel at a time.

Of course our jackass IT director loves to blame others for any problems so that he doesn't have to fix them. He may or may not be legitimately overworked, but goddamn does he ever love to find ways to pass the buck or ignore stuff so that shit never gets fixed.

 :MENDOZAAAAA:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on June 22, 2009, 05:00:10 PM
During my eight hour day today, I hit submit on a single form and wrote responses to two emails.

Well, downtime is important to me.

(the reality is that I am severely bored but afraid to ask coworkers for some of their backlog because they will invariably hand me their shittiest orders.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 29, 2009, 06:24:17 AM
Two bitter, funny stories. One from this week and one from just now. Both are fun demonstrations of the unbelieveable things that people in this company will say with a straight face.

Last week, I asked for a fan, since the box they moved me to has zero ventilation. It is a completely enclosed space. So anyway, our Comptroller pointed out that I would need to get my department's permission, since the cost would be billed to them. Fair enough.

Now, I figured my manager would probably okay it, or at worst just say no. But her response was hilarious: I'm not in her budget since I'm in Canada. Instead claiming that my budget comes out of the Canadian Sales budget (which sure was news to Sales!), so, uh, hey you guys pay for that. The National Sales Manager and I had a pretty good laugh about that one.

----

So today I got a fax from a client for an account application. It was perfectly legible, though a bit small. I faxed to that to the appropriate Finance Monkey to set the account up.

So this morning, I get a "this fax was illegible" line. O-kay.

We scanned the originals here and I sent the images over to her. The scans were perfectly legible. But sure enough, I get a reply "I can't read this".

So hey, sure, I'll play ball. I mean, golly, that magnification tool in Acrobat can be a real scary complicated thing - and god knows that only a PROGRAMMING WIZIZARD can figure out 'fit to item to page' in the print settings menu. I mean, hell, what are you even DOING in the print settings menu? Normal business users are only certified to operate the one-touch print icon. Meddling with the printer settings is something only a Trained Professional should attempt. Adobe cannot be held responsible should untrained use result in an unsightly loss of limbs.

So anyway, I opened the scans, enlarged them myself, re-sent the whole damn thing.

Then I got a reply: Oh, uh, okay. I'll uh do this Wednesday when you're out of the office for Canada Day. Maybe. :MENDOZAAAAA:

And then to cap it all off, I got a call from that customer exactly five minutes later wondering why the order they wanted to place hadn't gone out yet. They hadn't called in a month.

 :facepalm:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on June 29, 2009, 12:21:50 PM
I found a ten dollar bill in the bread bin.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Koah on June 29, 2009, 12:28:03 PM
Makes sense.  Where else would you find dough?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 29, 2009, 12:29:13 PM
GIMME ALL YO' BREAD, SUCKA!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 30, 2009, 01:03:55 PM
You know... at some point, the management of this company is going to have to man up and realize that "Golly! I really have no clue where your stuff is!" and/or "Gee whillikers! I jes don't have any idea when that will arrive!" are not appropriate or satisfactory responses to hospital purchasing departments.

:facepalm:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on June 30, 2009, 06:26:48 PM
I think working at the bakery would be so much nicer if people told me what machine was operational and what was not.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on July 03, 2009, 07:26:13 PM
I'm working and leaning against my van having a cigarette as a guy that lives on the same court as the customer walks up while walking his dog.

Guy: "Hiding so your parents don't see you smoking, eh?"
*I look up to the van where I am literally leaning next to my company's name in large, bold text, and down to my plain polo shirt save the same name in the same color and font*
Me: "You are truly a master detective."
*The guy smiles and walks away with the dog again.*
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on July 04, 2009, 02:31:56 AM
I hear web developers rant how terrible PHP is, so in between freelance projects I'm learning Python, along with a framework like Django.

Turns out most of the jobs are for PHP.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 10, 2009, 07:29:23 AM
The inevitable happened: My manager complained about my sending thank-you notes.

 :8D:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on July 10, 2009, 07:45:15 AM
 :perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 13, 2009, 10:52:43 AM
Jesus Crack-Smoking Pilsbury-Biscuit Dragon-Faced Christ, can I go one week without getting smacked by my boss over something that I didn't even know I was supposed to do?

I mean, if I knew this shit ahead of time, you can bet your ass actually be doing it, because I don't need this shit!

Like... I'll have an email from her stating if you want [A], then send me [X,Y, and Z]. Then I do just that and get yelled at because I didn't send [Q] and just who do I think I am and what am I trying to get away with? I call her on this shit when I can be bothered to do so, but it's still damn tiresome.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on July 20, 2009, 04:32:18 PM
I spent nine hours today reading incoming emails, typing one line responses, and trying desperately not to fall asleep.

Fuck a whole lot of mondays at the office.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 03, 2009, 07:02:03 AM
The entire goddamn city has today off but us. Goddamned "optional" civic holidays. ::(:

At least the drive in today was easy.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 14, 2009, 05:41:37 AM
So for the past three days, my Manager's been here doing review, training etc. On the whole, I think it went very well, better than either of us expected and I think relations will improve because of it.

But one thing she did tell me was basically to stop sending thank-you notes and the like.

I don't know. I feel old. When did I become such a dinosaur? When did the frenzied pace of global competition become so great that it squeezed out even the smallest concessions to social lubricant?

Christ I'm tired.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Fredward on August 14, 2009, 08:23:15 AM
Once again, I feel like your avatar is eerily appropriate.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Doom on August 14, 2009, 08:56:54 AM
How does she even enforce that.

It'd almost be worth it to have a written reprimand from your boss that you are "too much of a social gentleman."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 14, 2009, 09:59:55 AM
I guess people complained about getting thank-you emails my spam? Or at least mentioned it to her.

I don't even care anymore. I should probably just sit and listen to Bob Seger all day or whatever is appropriate for other clueless discarded relics from the working world of yesteryear.





Good thing I like Bob Seger.

...

Wait a minute... ah fuck
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 14, 2009, 10:05:20 AM
In fairness to them, I did have a tendency to go all WORD TRAIN in emails (the two issues were brought up together), but that was because a: They (mostly my Manager) repatedly failed to understand clear and concise emails, despite all my efforts (I have been instructed to send future requests in bulleted form only. Ha!), so I had to write goddamned novels to explain that I wasn't a lunatic (see earlier stories in this thread), and b: I thought I wasn't allowed to call her (this was certainly true until about May. Nobody told me that had gone back to 'normal') and could ONLY communicate via email.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on August 19, 2009, 01:41:20 PM
12 days of high intensity time in the bush

day one through five came as a surprise at the last minute

and it's not over yet

i hurt so much and wish I had a clean pair of... anything that wasn't permated in blood, sweat, campaint and deet

on a plus notes, none of my students failed their assesments

but i hurt

and smell

and tire

and i really really wish the only heatwave of the summer didn't wait for the time i was out.  I was looking forward to not being swarmed by mosquitos.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on August 20, 2009, 07:01:18 PM
One other note:  my troops make me look good.  I am blessed for having such a competent bunch..

Today, we were cleaning rifles in the classroom, so one of them anticipated myself offering music of their choice during the task and made a directional antenna for their barracks 802.11.g router so we could have youtube while cleaning the weapons - a good source for request tunes..

Between that and comments from the quartermaster to the area of 'These weapons have never been this clean' - all before lunch allowing myself and my students to fuck off before lunch allowing me to get my ordered book 'the mouse that roared'...

I'm happy.  a good bunch of them i taught last year on their boot camp go on parade for their apprentence course tomorrow morning.  I will be there in the front row applauding them. 

When I was on grad parades, i thought of it as a croc as no one came out to see me.  I hope my presence in the front row shows them that people give a fuck about them..   


I also was able to bark at the RSM and a couple troop officers today, as well as the construction engineering section for outright incompetence in paper form today - I can't spare the details but if the public got hold of it, it would make macleans for 'military ammo found in dumpster'...

This has been my best workday ever - and i was hungover.  i love my job.

Especially because my troops make me look good by being badass.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on August 21, 2009, 06:54:40 AM
It makes me wonder what my Recruit Commanders thought of my division as we were leaving boot camp.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on August 21, 2009, 10:58:13 AM
This week at work I left a spreadsheet open on one screen and played on the internet in the other. And did no work.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 21, 2009, 11:06:31 AM
I DID EQUATIONS WITH MY RIGHT HAND
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on August 21, 2009, 12:32:58 PM
With your right hand? :ohmy: But- what was your left hand doing?  :oh:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 21, 2009, 12:43:21 PM
Writing down names.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on August 21, 2009, 04:07:45 PM
It's not as good without the video and attendant latin chanting overblown orchestra music but even so i laughed
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 21, 2009, 04:11:14 PM
I just found out we're out of potato chips.

This was not... supposed to happen.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on August 21, 2009, 04:12:04 PM
What were you gonna say before you paused there?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 21, 2009, 04:13:35 PM
Fuck you Norondor

Swear to God

I'll teach you how to swim
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 23, 2009, 08:36:06 AM
Hi, how did you wake up today?  I got woken up at 8:30 in the morning on a Sunday by a client asking a technical support question.  I am not being paid for it.

Thanks for reminding me to get back to looking for a regular job, chucklenuts.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 10, 2009, 08:09:48 AM
Some of you may remember my stories about the National Sales Manager. Well, today I found out you sure don't cross him!

Our reception staff are outsourced (we have a rather weird rental agreement) and in all fairness, they are the worst kind of catty lazy secretary stereotype. I've been bugging them for a replacement chair for some time since the ones they had here before are junk. Well, the NSM decided he was spoiling for a fight and decided to uh... take up my cause. I was initially thankful when I thought he was just going to send one email or something.

But no, he started riding them. Hard. That was already kind of awkward, because jesus, it's just a fucking chair. So, today they figured out how to get me a replacement and said I could have it at the end of the month. I thought that was perfectly fine, and said as much. End of story, not worth even thinking abut, much less posting here, right? But A Fighter couldn't let end there, ohhhh no no no? My er, 'friend' went at it with such vicious zeal that if even if Joseph MacCarthy had been hunting actual witches he'd still have been put to shame. He demaned INSTANT RESULTS. TODAY. OR WE'RE LEAVING. THE WHOLE OFFICE.

Eventually, when it became clear it wasn't going to happen today, and I'd repeated to him that I could wait, he gave me his own chair.

The whole thing was weird. Not to mention embarassing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Doom on September 10, 2009, 08:12:53 AM
Become drinking buddies with this man, stat.

He sounds like a rugged stallion.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 10, 2009, 08:16:59 AM
Become drinking buddies with this man, stat.

He sounds like a rugged stallion.

Well, he IS Irish.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on September 10, 2009, 09:54:38 AM
Two weeks tends to be a good point, if you have a centralized office supply logistical system, tack on three days.  Personaly I am used to sole-source contracts per year, which means that you have the ability to request something from one catalogue, ie grand and toy.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on September 13, 2009, 04:05:24 AM
Become drinking buddies with this man, stat.

He sounds like a rugged stallion.
(http://i630.photobucket.com/albums/uu23/Bon_Bon_2009/scruffy-1.jpg)
This is very much the kind of person you want to be friends with. Or at the very least, make everyone think you're friends with.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Fortinbras on September 14, 2009, 12:43:04 PM
Looks like I'm going to be working line at a place called Spice of Life.  If you're Buge you probably know it!  Indian/Thai/Mediterranean/general fusion with a lot of vegetarian/vegan/gluten free stuff.

My perfect record remains intact.  Never gotten an interview and not gone on to get a job from it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on September 14, 2009, 01:24:51 PM
I WANTED TO WORK THERE

SO I COULD EAT FOOD AS WELL AS PREPARE IT FOR CUSTOMERS

SLEEP WITH ONE EYE OPEN YOU JOB BANDIT
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 14, 2009, 02:59:55 PM
...or, get you a job there?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on September 14, 2009, 08:03:07 PM
Went into an interview today for this dynamite barbecue place, Mojoe's.
They told me it'd be an hour of interviewing. Deep in depth questions and essay type dealies. Took me a handshake and a few quick "Yessirs" and they gave me the job. Took less than two minutes

Easy as pie job. They have a lunch rush and that's about it. Rest of the day is cleaning the tables and watching the meat spin. Pays ten an hour.

Chick behind me in the interview wore a shirt that was so thin you could see through it. Her horrible looking white bra (with stains) and white thong (more stains) showed through. Dunno if she got the job. :P
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on September 21, 2009, 07:29:07 AM
One day at work I wasn't paying attention and spilled 20 ounces of Vault all over my work laptop, which immediately shut everything down and turned itself off. 

I start going OMG OMG OMG as my coworker Sandra announces that she's going to clean out her desk and pulls out a bottle of ketchup, a loaf of bread, and an economy sized bottle of maple syrup.

Wondering if I've finally lost my fucking mind, I take the back off of my laptop and start shaking coke out of it frantically.

At this moment the external auditors walk into our office (internal audit) to see me looking crazy and trying to figure out what the fuck is going on with that fucking bottle of syrup. :'(  Then the guys painting the walls knock my desk over and it shatters into pieces. 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 21, 2009, 07:48:57 AM
...

wow.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on September 22, 2009, 12:27:28 PM
...Uh, I learned how to stalk and ambush people through the use of swamps the other week and pulled it off on my own during a stalk and ambush competition (turns out the most logical route of advance isn't the one expected as people believe people are lazy)...  Ended up freezing for the rest of the night and had to take off two leeches with salt..

MCE still wins..

by a longshot.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on September 22, 2009, 12:40:09 PM
We got new chairs last week that sit taller than our others so our admin assistant I mean secretary announced that she was going to order the short people footrests so they aren't uncomfortable.

She forgot to order me one.

I'm four fucking ten what the fuck I really think I'm just losing my mind sometimes
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on September 22, 2009, 12:53:06 PM
Maybe she did order you one, but didn't want to cop to ordering one that was too short to accommodate you! Shorty short short short. Short.


Also sorry to hear that your job has kinda been a great steaming pile lately.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on September 22, 2009, 01:06:51 PM
I just hate coming to work to do the same job as someone who says "we was" "you was" "where was y'all" and launches into the same questions regardless of how you answer "Was you watchin' America's Got Talent last night?"

To clarify.. the job isn't BAD, I just feel like I never know what the fuck is going on.  Is this a sitcom, or what?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on September 22, 2009, 05:55:44 PM
Could be. I used to live in one.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on September 22, 2009, 06:19:59 PM
It could be worse; it could be a soap.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 22, 2009, 07:23:47 PM
Could always be both.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSaNWYHmUvI
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on September 23, 2009, 05:36:41 AM
Hm... no, it's more like this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x5t_hKDfu7g
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on September 23, 2009, 08:28:56 AM
I don't know how much of my network traffic is monitored and how much i can get away with saying about this job, but telecom is a wretched hive of scum and villainy, filled with rogues and mountebancs who are ready to pounce on each other, with daggers placed firmly in backs at a moment's notice. It kind of makes sense that these companies were all in the same family once, since they get along pretty much exactly like I did with my brother during my adolescense. And I don't mean the lovable innocent sibling rivalry, I mean the 'throw you down the stairs over a bowl of trix' sibling rivalry.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 23, 2009, 09:33:59 AM
mountebancs

 :smile:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on September 23, 2009, 12:11:25 PM
I HAS A JOB.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=McN3_4vdMGs
Now to move up to Washington state to beautiful Whidbey Island, where I'll be working on the Naval base there, fixing EA-18G Growlers!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on September 23, 2009, 12:14:43 PM
(http://www.advancedpt.com/graphics/congratulations.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 23, 2009, 12:31:39 PM
So you did get it after all.

(http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i310/rolotamasi/420Thumbs20Up.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on September 23, 2009, 03:26:16 PM
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v316/buge/LEX_IS_PLEASED.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on September 25, 2009, 07:25:55 AM
My CIA application was approved today. I wish it was as cool as it sounds!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 25, 2009, 07:28:20 AM
Does CIA in this case stand for Central Intelligence Agency, or is there a punchline here?  :rogue:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on September 25, 2009, 07:31:33 AM
I wish. But it's Certified Internal Auditor.  At least it's an international certification!

But we'll see what people think when my business cards say Miss Cat Ears, CFE, CIA.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on September 25, 2009, 07:33:30 AM
Aren't you a little short to be a storm auditor?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 25, 2009, 08:29:26 AM
That's just her disguise.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lady Duke on September 26, 2009, 06:07:37 PM
Today when we were closing the gas station I work at, a coworker and myself had to check diesel levels, and she got diesel all over my sweatshirt and her skirt and it smelled sooooooooooooo bad ;-;
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on September 27, 2009, 04:16:21 PM
McDohl:  I've done a few exercises in the mid decade on Indian Island.  The place is intensely beautiful, and places like Port Angeles spout the friendliest people I've met. 

I got free breakfasts there TWICE by some unknown stranger I never met just because I was in my uniform..  Also the "god bless you count for me four weeks there combined was in the 60's... 

I don't get that anywhere else..

PS:  Now would be a good time to do the West Coast Trail (http://www.westcoasttrailbc.com/).  And by now, I mean next spring/Summer/Autumn.  You're that close to the true meaning of paradise. 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 27, 2009, 05:41:54 PM
McDohl:  I've done a few exercises in the mid decade on Indian Island.  The place is intensely beautiful, and places like Port Angeles spout the friendliest people I've met. 

I got free breakfasts there TWICE by some unknown stranger I never met just because I was in my uniform..  Also the "god bless you count for me four weeks there combined was in the 60's... 

I don't get that anywhere else..

PS:  Now would be a good time to do the West Coast Trail (http://www.westcoasttrailbc.com/).  And by now, I mean next spring/Summer/Autumn.  You're that close to the true meaning of paradise. 

Actually, on that subject... (http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/national/british-columbia/in-the-eyes-of-a-bear-an-activist-was-born/article1303254/#photos)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on September 29, 2009, 04:46:09 AM
Tim Schafer recalls how he got his start. (http://www.doublefine.com/site/comments/twenty_years_only_a_few_tears/)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 29, 2009, 10:05:54 AM
Oh for the days when hiring managers would actually bother to send you a rejection letter.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on September 29, 2009, 11:11:53 AM
Tim Schafer, currently of Double Fine, talks a bit about how he got his first gaming gig. (http://www.doublefine.com/site/comments/twenty_years_only_a_few_tears/)

Disregard, cocks were sucked.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: yyler on September 29, 2009, 11:16:42 AM
DID THAT REALLY JUST HAPPEN
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on September 29, 2009, 11:29:09 AM
lollerskates
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on September 29, 2009, 12:13:51 PM
Oh for the days when hiring managers would actually bother to send you a rejection letter.

I got one from Walgreen's last week! It was a pleasant surprise.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 29, 2009, 01:20:37 PM
An hour after I posted that, I submitted two resumes, and got two responses.

I tend to forget that my powers are activated by bitching.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lady Duke on September 29, 2009, 08:08:02 PM
Kazz and I worked the same shift at the gas station we both work at.  It was sorta fun.  And then I got sick and threw up and neither of us knew how to close the store!  Hurray!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on September 29, 2009, 11:39:06 PM
hand drawn sign, "PUKE ON FLOOR, BYE"
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lady Duke on September 30, 2009, 01:32:16 PM
I threw up into a toilet, cmon now.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on September 30, 2009, 01:44:05 PM
if you had puked on the floor, you would have had a good excuse to close!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on September 30, 2009, 02:20:40 PM
But if somebody else pukes on the floor, you have to clean it up.

WHERE'S THE JUSTICE???
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on September 30, 2009, 03:39:19 PM
i worked so hard and frantically for the first four hours of my day today that I had a series of panic attacks that lasted about an hour.  :painful:

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 30, 2009, 03:41:36 PM
tell me about it
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 30, 2009, 10:38:03 PM
You know you've been coding for too long when you put /* */ around bits of an email that you're not sure if you want to delete.

And then seconds later, you almost close the window trying to hit the keyboard shortcut to compile.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on October 06, 2009, 06:37:27 PM
So I'm working for Walmart again. On the plus side, it's at a different store, and I'm making over $2/hr more to walk around the store in regular clothes and catch shoplifters. Also, for the first 6 weeks, I'll be getting mileage pay for driving to another store for training.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on October 07, 2009, 01:10:06 PM
I swear to god if Bob does not stop breathing or blow his goddamn nose or something so that I don't have to listen to it WHISTLING anymore I am going to kill myself
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Pacobird on October 08, 2009, 11:06:24 AM
So I'm working for Walmart again. On the plus side, it's at a different store, and I'm making over $2/hr more to walk around the store in regular clothes and catch shoplifters. Also, for the first 6 weeks, I'll be getting mileage pay for driving to another store for training.

Loss prevention is a sweet gig for retail.


In other news, being a librarian is still boring.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 08, 2009, 12:18:56 PM
Q: What do you do when you're stuck between a hammer and an anvil?

A: Aim the two sides at each other and duck.

:glee:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on October 12, 2009, 04:14:55 PM
So, okay.  Today the company bigwigs -- like big-big, people at the central office out-of-state -- announced that they're putting just about everybody in the company on a mandatory vacation the week after Christmas and running every office on a skeleton crew.  Everybody's going to have to take 40 vacation hours whether they want to or not.

Now, by my count, there are four classes of people as far as vacation time.

First is the people who never take a damn vacation and have a shit-ton of hours saved up that they never use.  Now, for them, this is a boon; they get to take a paid break and not worry about too much stuff piling up while they're gone.

Next rung down is the people who only have a week or two of vacation saved up.  For them, this is an inconvenience; they're forced to use a week's vacation here, and that's going to impact their vacation plans for the rest of the year.

Next rung down is the people who don't have 40 hours' vacation saved up.  This kinda sucks for them; they're going to have to make up those hours later.  (Someone on the group mailing list commented that that doesn't sound legal, but on paper it's optional and they can work that week if they want to.  I am given to assume that it's much less optional in practice.)

And on the bottom rung, you get the temps.  For us, it's a week of mandatory unpaid vacation.  Now, okay, a week's mandatory unpaid vacation right after Christmas is a kick in the dick in and of itself, but adding insult to injury is the fact that we're entitled to a paid holiday on New Year's Day -- but only if we work at least 20 hours that week.

This strikes me as quite possibly the worst management decision I have ever seen, which is really saying quite a lot.  I know the temps are (at least theoretically) expendable, but I think this is going to hurt morale for all but the top rung of people I've mentioned.  And it's just bad business sense to piss off a bunch of people and then give them a free week to go look for another job RIGHT BEFORE THE BEGINNING OF THE YEAR, which is quite possibly the easiest time to get hired.

My immediate supervisor is trying to go to bat for us; I've pointed out that UPS still runs during that week and they're still going to need us to process those packages.  Even if we could pull down, say, 20 hours that week and 20 the next, we'd at least get our paid holiday (which I don't think even costs the company anything, I think that's all on the temp agency's dime).

Anyway.  I am almost done with my first beer of the evening.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on October 15, 2009, 09:33:15 AM
God damn this crazy freaking school.  Either there is a choir somewhere in the building singing Oklahoma songs or I have officially lost my mind.  I don't know which would be worse.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on October 15, 2009, 09:36:21 AM
Again you people with these either or propositions. Fuck English and it's exclusive or convention. Logic OR for life bitches.

EDIT:

In summary, the silver lining here is that it's easy to figure out which option is worst. :whoops:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 15, 2009, 09:47:01 AM
Again you people with these either or propositions. Fuck English and it's exclusive or convention. Logic OR for life bitches.

EDIT:

In summary, the silver lining here is that it's easy to figure out which option is worst. :whoops:

:OoO:

...

...

I haven't got the foggiest, old bean.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on October 15, 2009, 09:52:02 AM
He is implying that it could be both in an extremely nerdy way.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on October 15, 2009, 10:05:06 AM
I don't even read Classic's posts anymore.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kazz on October 15, 2009, 10:32:36 AM
 :victory:

I'm so proud of you!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Detonator on October 15, 2009, 11:55:59 AM
I am downright envious.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on October 15, 2009, 01:22:39 PM
 (http://i630.photobucket.com/albums/uu23/Bon_Bon_2009/scruffy-1.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on October 19, 2009, 10:06:38 PM
http://www.noteviljustwrong.com/

A local teaparty chapter thing rented our theater out to show this tonight.   I wanted to walk out several times just listening to the conversations in the lobby.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Doom on October 19, 2009, 10:09:42 PM
Every Texan must endure the curse of living in Texas.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: yyler on October 19, 2009, 10:14:57 PM
Haha it's giving me a 403. NICE WEBSITE, MORONS
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on October 19, 2009, 10:16:47 PM
to prove there is a just and loving god, they have been getting ddos'd apparantly
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on October 21, 2009, 11:30:18 AM
 :mystery: I found a fraud!!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on October 25, 2009, 09:17:09 PM
Quote from: the website
Right now in a classroom in Illinois, Al Gore’s An Inconvenient Truth is being taught to our children as an article of science, not faith.

Yes.  Because when I am concerned about things that are being taught as science instead of faith in public schools, the first thing that leaps to mind is man-made climate change.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on October 25, 2009, 09:18:31 PM
Wait, so they'd be okay with it if we just blamed global warming on Satan?

EDIT: I just remembered that conservatives actually blame it on solar flares.  So, Ra then.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on October 25, 2009, 10:01:14 PM
As I understand it, man-caused global warming isn't quite the open-and-shut case we'd like it to be. However, we do know that most of the pollutants we let out into the air aren't very good for you and we do know that the Earth's overall temperature is warming. So, :shrug: it's more akin to the Borh model for the atom than creation. ... ... And even then, more like the assumption that there are planets orbiting other stars. Which I mention because we recently got images of planetoids around other stars. So it turns out it was a pretty good guess.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on October 26, 2009, 01:35:10 PM
I work in a windowless poorly ventilated box (former server room), that comfortably seats 2, currently staffing four.  I work with hardware that we cannot perform remote debugging on, that is acting up, that is managed by a server team I can't really contact easily. On this hardware I am assigned to develop and patch up custom written ASP.NET software mostly written by a person who has a background in PHP and whom likes to copy-paste things rather than use object oriented methodology to dramatically cut down work and debugging times.  Nothing we write actually builds in Visual Studio, you just have to put it on the server and see if it runs.

 :gameover:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 27, 2009, 07:51:11 AM
You know what's awesome? Having someone call in about a situation that's all fucked up, having the thought "Oh great, what did I do now." and then realizing that the issue in question is actually eight months old and was caused by someone who was fired months ago.

 :perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 05, 2009, 07:37:31 PM
Okay yeah I should have seen this coming but

I always sort of wondered why people in this industry kept falling over themselves thanking me for just doing my damned job on time.  I always sort of thought they were being facetious.

Today I have been waiting for calls from four different people.  None of them have come through.

It just hit me that they weren't just exaggerating; it is incredibly special to them that I get shit done when I say I'm going to.

(PS Exquisite Knorpse will probably be extremely late.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 13, 2009, 09:49:31 AM
I don't know if I ever described the dynamic that keeps me employed, but it goes like this:

My manager is a by-the-book type. She knows that - by the numbers at least - I do less work than any of the reps in the US. Now, I actually do a bunch of work she never sees because she's in New Jersey, but the only way of letting her know this would be awkwardly cc her on all my emails (which would just drive her crazy anyway because she hates getting emails she doesn't really need to deal with). So my actual manager would probably argue to get rid of me.

Luckily, I'm not actually on her budget, thanks to a weird arrangement. The Stallion actually pays the bills for me AND regularly argues that I am critical because the Canadian customers need to talk to a Canadian rep. He always has these arguments behind closed doors, but once in a while I hear them (whether that's intentional or not, I can't say) - he's also correct that Canadian customers don't like calling the US line because the girls down there don't know much about our accounts whereas I practically have everything and everyone memorized.

The Stallion and my manager also don't get along very well, though I try to avoid that myself.

The Stallion is pretty much single-handedly responsible for the fact that I have a job at all, never mind that it's easy, decently-paying, and not very stressful at all.

I just wish I could tell the The Stallion how thankful I am without, you know, admitting that I've overheard his conversations (however unintentionally). Especially since he's a somewhat private guy.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 13, 2009, 10:01:27 AM
Without any further context I can't help but imagine Sylvester Stallone behind closed doors somewhere, saying "Look, 'e's an okay guy, allll right?  We need these, these Canadian kids, 'e's... 'e's just allll right, okay?  Ey?  Adrian?"
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 13, 2009, 10:35:04 AM
I call him The Stallion now because of this post. (http://brontoforum.us/index.php?topic=256.msg107849#msg107849)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 13, 2009, 10:58:58 AM
Well now I'm imagining he's Dr. Claw.

Man is serious about chairs.  :serious:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 13, 2009, 11:22:35 AM
Come to think of it, the entire secretary pool either quit or was transferred to other offices all within the space of the last month. :mikey:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on November 13, 2009, 12:06:30 PM
(http://thecriticalcritics.com/review/wp-content/images/top10/music_bands/wyld_stallyns.jpg)

Bogus.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 13, 2009, 06:12:44 PM
Well, they were pretty useless.

I keep imagining it as more this kind of situation.

(http://www.blockbuster.co.uk/bbimages/UK/Glossy/June06/DangerousDads/DonVitoCorleone.jpg)

"You know what happens to airheaded bitches who waste Th' Stallion's time. I want to come in tomorrow and for this to all have been taken care of already."

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on November 14, 2009, 10:58:01 PM
Caught my first shoplifter today! Then, as soon as I finished writing the report for that one, I caught another one! Damn teenagers.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on November 15, 2009, 02:56:04 PM
Our newest temp got a better offer and quit last week.

Upper management decided not to replace him, so we're back to being REALLY understaffed instead of just KINDA understaffed.

So, even if it wasn't a layoff, management HAS officially started cutting temp positions in my department.

Spent this afternoon updating resume/Careerbuilder/LinkedIn info.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 16, 2009, 05:36:03 PM
Careerbuilder

I'm tracing a lot of "resume expert" spam and "for some reason we figured you'd like to start selling insurance" calls to this one.

Oddly enough the easiest way to not get dicked with it seems is to go through Craigslist.  I guess the whole "no room for razz-and-dazzle, no help from the service itself screwing with people" setup turns away people who are out to waste your time.  Well, intentionally at least.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 20, 2009, 08:57:50 AM
So long as I am still an independent douchebag, I should never be awake and posting before 10 AM.  C'est la vie.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 23, 2009, 09:20:24 AM
So yeah, the scourge of calls at 7-8 in the morning had been going on for some time.  Let's just mention right now that

A) I tell my clients not to call me before 10, period.
B) I've been going to sleep at around 4 AM for the past few months.
C) I went to bed at seven this morning since I spent the last night trying to get as close to the finish line with the Knorpse as I could.

So I get this call at 8:30, right?

:painful: Good mor- I mean, hello, this is Brent.
:whoops: Hi!  I'm calling about the interview you had last week.  What did you think of it?
:painful: Was good.  Kinda long.
:whoops: Long?
:painful: Was supposed to be an hour, think it was two.  Long.
:whoops: Okay, uh, did you like the company?
:painful: Seems pretty good.
:whoops: The position?
:painful: Yeah, I er... yeah, I mean it was a pretty good entry point I thought.
:whoops: So are you interested in the job?
:painful: Sure, why not?
:whoops: Okay, well, so, we want to go ahead with an offer...
:painful: Aaaaaaaaaaah... hold on, let's start over here.
:happy: Hello!  Good morning!

As far as "why the fuck are you calling me so early" conversations go, this one was pretty tolerable imo.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 23, 2009, 09:25:21 AM
So you're going to... stop being an independant douchebag?  :wat:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 23, 2009, 09:38:46 AM
Oh hells yes.

Expect my post rate to achieve levels of near-normality in the near future.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on November 23, 2009, 09:40:05 AM
I had a call like that one Saturday morning when I was in the Navy.
 :painful:: Whoever this is, you'd better have a damn good reason for calling me this early on a Saturday.
 :serious:: Good morning, Mr. Nelson, this is Chris Chope, the Executive Officer.
 :oic:: Good morning, sir.
 :serious:: Do you know why I'm calling you this morning?
 :painful:: No idea, sir.
 :goodnews:: You've just been promoted!
 :8D:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on November 23, 2009, 03:58:06 PM
Same deal with when i got hired recently. Why do HR people call so early? Don't they realize we're unemployed?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 23, 2009, 06:45:06 PM
In McDohl's case, I'd give even odds that the XO knew exactly what would happen when he called that early. :itsmagic:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Dooly on November 23, 2009, 06:46:55 PM
Beats the hell out of being called early on Monday morning to be told I'm fired from a night shift job.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 23, 2009, 06:48:03 PM
That's where your current avatar comes in.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 23, 2009, 07:36:29 PM
Same deal with when i got hired recently. Why do HR people call so early? Don't they realize we're unemployed?

Starting to think they do that on purpose just to impress upon you the fact that yes, you are going to have to start keeping civilized hours now, so you'd better take the time to get used to it while you can.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 25, 2009, 10:31:23 AM
:goodnews: Boy I sure am glad to be done with that Knorpse business!  Now to catch up on my slee-
:wakka: RING RING HALP I BROKE MY SHIT AGAIN
:painful: I should have been expecting that.  Why was I not expecting that.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on November 25, 2009, 12:33:57 PM
I think its because you had a little bit of happiness there. Probably that is it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 25, 2009, 01:59:25 PM
Oh good, it's reflective.

I am perfectly okay with that!  :perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Cannon on December 02, 2009, 07:33:11 PM
:america: Pizza Hut Delivery at Oakley Village. Can I help you?

:ohmy: Is your refrigerator running?

:america: Come again?

:HUGE: Is your refrigerator running?

:america: ...Oh, ha, ha. I get it. Did you want to place an order?

:oh: No, I -

:america: All right, then! Merry Christmas!

SWEAR AT THE GUY WHO PICKS UP
:advice:
ACTUAL PRANKING IS TOO HARD
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on December 03, 2009, 06:42:28 AM
Maybe he's a refridgerator repairman trying to drum up business. Christmas is tough and he has a lot of kids to provide for.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on December 04, 2009, 06:54:21 PM
I just got two form rejection letters for the position I just started.

That caps off my job search perfectly, I think.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: jsnlxndrlv on December 04, 2009, 06:56:20 PM
Wait, what? So they hired you by mistake, or they rejected you by mistake? Sounds complicated.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on December 04, 2009, 07:27:47 PM
So if you're hired once, but rejected twice, does that roll back over to hired?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on December 04, 2009, 07:30:04 PM
Is this what happened to Milton?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: King Klown on December 04, 2009, 08:39:43 PM
I believe it is.

Just skip the years of abuse and go straight to the burning of the building.

Store got flooded with warm bodies to train. Time to train the best cashiers in the world and do poorly myself again this year.  :nyoro~n:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on December 05, 2009, 06:01:44 AM
Actually what I think happened is that they were writing to inform me that they had already hired somebody for the position.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on December 05, 2009, 02:22:25 PM
And they didn't realize that that person was you?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on December 05, 2009, 09:57:41 PM
Time paradox?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on December 05, 2009, 10:26:20 PM
So... brentai... does this mean we'll be seeing more Xenogroans the LP in the near future? :goodnews:

Also, do you maybe want a hug?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on December 06, 2009, 12:35:50 AM
Er, no, I definitely have a job.  The system just autogenerated an email (or two) to inform me that the position was unavailable because the position had been filled by somebody, who is me.

Basically somebody forgot to flip a switch somewhere.  These are the things that it is my job to fix!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on December 06, 2009, 12:38:15 AM
Stupid shadow Brentais, taking all the jobs from us real Brentais. Makes me sick.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on December 06, 2009, 12:46:17 AM
You're not a real Brentai.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on December 06, 2009, 12:48:00 AM
Am I a real Brentai?
 :nyoro~n:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on December 06, 2009, 12:51:21 AM
I hate being a brentab
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on December 06, 2009, 03:30:10 AM
We all have a little shadow Brentai inside us. Which is good, because
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on December 06, 2009, 03:03:32 PM
if we had a big shadow Brentai inside us our voice actor would die and our body would be relegated to mere meat-puppet dancing at the whims of a sentient weapon.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on December 06, 2009, 03:17:24 PM
And we'd have no "happy" endings for our story mode. ::(:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on December 06, 2009, 03:19:53 PM
And then Shadow Brentai would spend all his time trying to molest an angry blond woman.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Koah on December 06, 2009, 04:01:57 PM
After which the normal Brentai would vociferously deny any connection to Shadow Brentai, the rest of the party would fight it and, because every other even remotely suitable god, mythological or distant historical figure was taken by other people previously, Brentai would end up getting John F. Kennedy as a Persona.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on December 06, 2009, 04:47:17 PM
SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE EAAAAAAAAAAAAAATEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on December 06, 2009, 09:16:40 PM
http://www.corporate-sellout.com/trinity/13-40s.html -- Relevant link.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on December 06, 2009, 09:29:23 PM
I... I used to have... so much hair...
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 07, 2009, 05:59:57 AM
I... I used to have... a mullet...
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on December 10, 2009, 07:09:23 PM
So I got my first paycheck today!






 :ohshi~:






 :slow: Y'ello, Workaround-for-Corporation-to-Not-Pay-You-Benefits-to-Start Services, how can I help you?
 :nyoro~n: Yeah uhhhhh I think you might have my pay rate wrong in your system.
 :slow: Hmmm.  How wrong?
 :nyoro~n: Like, almost twice as much wrong.
 :slow: Golly!
 :nyoro~n: Yep.
 :slow: Let me see... yes, it looks like we did pay you about an assload more than we're supposed to.
 :nyoro~n: Well I was hoping you were going to say I was wrong for once in my life, but okay.
 :slow: Oh don't worry about it.  We'll just garnish the difference out of your next couple paychecks.
 :nyoro~n: Okay, thanks!  ...I think.
 :slow: Thanks for working with Workaround-for-Corpor
 :nyoro~n: Yeah okay bye.

I'm sure if I had tried to play it cool and not say anything I'd have a legion of burly men showing up at my desk in about a month or so, so logically I did serve my best interests there.  On the other hand, it's hard to ignore that little shoulder devil in the back of my brain that tells me I should have taken the chance to extort the fuck out of my employers.

Shoulder Devil is kind of a fucking moron, honestly.

Anyway, I got a payday advance for the holidays, and it didn't involve going down to a little place between the liquor store and the dunk tank.  Also, I discovered that my temporary status does not preclude me from using the corporate store.  Spiffy!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on December 10, 2009, 08:01:13 PM
Let's hope this isn't another of those things that you'll be required to fix.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on December 12, 2009, 10:30:36 PM
Careerbuilder

I'm tracing a lot of "resume expert" spam and "for some reason we figured you'd like to start selling insurance" calls to this one.

Oh, bigtime.

They've actually kinda cleared up since the first couple days after I updated my resume, though.

Oddly enough the easiest way to not get dicked with it seems is to go through Craigslist.  I guess the whole "no room for razz-and-dazzle, no help from the service itself screwing with people" setup turns away people who are out to waste your time.  Well, intentionally at least.

Pretty big on the simple "submit an E-Mail" ones, too.  I've reached a point where it takes a hell of a lot for me to bother with any site that requires me to sign up for an account -- I can do about ten "just give them my resume" postings in the same amount of time.

As far as "why the fuck are you calling me so early" conversations go, this one was pretty tolerable imo.

Yeah, that's how I got my current job.  The guy they'd hired pulled a no-call no-show so they called me and asked how soon I could get there.

...had a 5:30 AM call from a vendor once at my old job.  I'd downloaded some free program or another and they kept bugging me about getting some of their pay software.  I'd given them the company number, which called my cell during off-hours, and they apparently didn't bother to check what timezone I lived in.

When the lady started her sales pitch, my response was, in a tone of voice I believe is best described as "scandalized", "It's five-thirty in the morning!"

I did not buy anything from them.  And made it clear (in an E-Mail, hours later, at such a time as was actually appropriate to even be having a discussion of any kind with them) that they were not to contact me again.

My favorite thing about my current job is that it is a straight Monday-to-Friday 8-5.  I do occasionally pull a little extra time, but it's always planned for in advance, and I get paid for OT.

I... I used to have... so much hair...

You and me both.



(I still use the phrase "place of establishment" on like a weekly basis.)

:slow: Y'ello, Workaround-for-Corporation-to-Not-Pay-You-Benefits-to-Start Services, how can I help you?

Oh yeah, I'm pretty fucked right now because I still have a lung fungus and my health insurance has inexplicably decided I'm over my annual prescription reimbursement limit.  After fucking up my last two reimbursement requests and making me resend them.

Nothing like opening what you expect to be a $500 check and finding out it's actually $7!

I think I can probably get it fixed since by my math I am not even fucking close to my annual limit, but as you might expect I am very unhappy about it.  And I still have to buy at least another $200 worth of meds before the year rolls over.

Still, I know the vast majority of temps don't get health insurance at all, so maybe you're the wrong guy to bitch to.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on December 12, 2009, 10:58:47 PM
I don't, but it's not a big deal.  It was a bitch when I was a permatemp at Squeenix, but right now paying out-of-pocket for health insurance doesn't really hurt that much, and like I've said before I'm actually pretty happy with my level of health care.  Of course, as has been pointed out, I do not have anything so serious as a lung infection.  Ouch.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on December 14, 2009, 08:06:13 AM
If you are sick and I have a meeting for you, please let me know.  I walked for 20 minutes to your office and maybe most people don't think 30 degrees is cold but I prefer 80 degrees.  I'm dying here.

I wish I could put this kind of stuff in my audit report  ::(:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on December 14, 2009, 09:32:05 AM
Further cuts from this article just happened (http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/Canada/2009/11/25/11932166.html).  This directly affects what I do as I will no longer be teaching before the summer camps open up. 

On the plus side, I now have more time this winter for homework!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 14, 2009, 09:37:50 AM
Er... time to take a side trip back to soggy island?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on December 14, 2009, 09:43:14 AM
On the contrary.  This is sadly the best place to find training cash, not just to teach but to learn. 

I'm going to stay out here for awhile.  Otherwise things should be much better once we pull out from the Sandbox.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 14, 2009, 09:57:03 AM
On the contrary.  This is sadly the best place to find training cash, not just to teach but to learn. 

I'm going to stay out here for awhile.  Otherwise things should be much better once we pull out from the Sandbox.

No, I meant "Hey if you have a few nickels for plane fare, maybe you can take two weeks off in the depths of Feb or Jan to go get rained on?"

I don't know what your school schedule's like, but it'd be a nice break from WINTARRRR. Though my god, I'd much prefer the winter in that picture you posted to the typical Toronto winter (aka ALL SLUSH ALL THE TIME... EXCEPT WHEN IT'S GLASS-HARD ICE!)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on December 14, 2009, 10:42:53 AM
Fancy you should mention that.  I already have my surf shack in Tofino booked for the 19th.   Of Feb :suave:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on December 14, 2009, 11:07:53 AM
I get to have that winter during Christmas break when I go visit my parents! There's something magical and terrifying about the silence you experience when the snow covers everything.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on December 15, 2009, 12:35:10 PM
Today at work I listened to that mp3 at the top of the screen and stared at Kazz's signature the entire time
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on December 18, 2009, 07:32:35 PM
Yesterday basically marked the official end of my internship at this small publishing company I've been at for the past four months, mostly doing ghost writing for our clients, working up book proposals and running hells of social media. Turns out they my work is so dang  ~ s t u n n i n g ~  that they're going to hire me on for the next three or so months, and potentially further. Best part is that I managed to effectively make the case that I could work from home just as well as I could at the office, so that's three hours of pointless commuting I won't have to worry about.

Also got an interview with, ahem, "The National Network of Depression Centers" interviewing folks and writing up articles, so here's hoping that goes through as well.

DEPRESSION IS MY BUSINESS AND BUSINESS IS GOOD  :pimp:  :hi5:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on December 19, 2009, 11:09:50 AM
Outstanding, Kabbage.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on December 19, 2009, 07:56:09 PM
Yesterday, I had a guy call me out for watching him and his girlfriend. When I told him he was just imagining it, he said "How about we step outside, and I'll give you something to imagine." I asked if he was threatening me. His response: "I don't make threats, that was a promise." I asked him to hold on one second while I called management, and had him removed from the store. Of course, as soon as management showed up, he claimed he just wanted to step outside to talk to me(like we couldn't talk just fine inside?) and that the only reason I was watching them in the first place was because I, and Walmart, were racist(Full disclosure: the guy and his girlfriend were black, but I'd been told by several associates that she was a shoplifter, and that was why I was watching them, not the color of their skin. Also, I've apprehended 12 people so far, all but one of them white.).

So today, I found out we can trespass the guy if he comes back to the store.  :victory:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on December 19, 2009, 08:20:48 PM
 :racist:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Dooly on December 21, 2009, 04:52:43 PM
I've been unemployed for an entire year today!    :endit:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on December 21, 2009, 06:31:37 PM
Uh.... How are you affording anything?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on December 28, 2009, 09:06:23 PM
How my day went:

Well, okay.  Some background.  There are two major IT shops at my company, one here and one in the midwest.  For our purposes, I will call their respective heads Jim and Dwight.

Jim is my boss.  He's laid-back and until recently he was just one of the guys.  He's not afraid to get his hands dirty -- literally; I've seen him take trash out to the Dumpsters when it's gotten full.  He's not what I think of when I think "management material", and I mean that as a compliment.

Dwight runs the shop in the midwest.  He has a Napoleon complex, and he's exactly what I think of when I think "corporate".  He is the kind of guy who will insult you in a monotone with neutral-sounding language.

Dwight's the golden boy.  He's by-the-book.  His shop's doing better numbers than ours; he maintains that it's because they have a tighter set of procedures in place, and upper management agrees.  From where we're sitting, it looks like we've just got so much more shit to do than they do that we can't keep up.

So, okay.  Jim's off for two weeks for the holidays.  He told us to send our timecards to Dwight last Thursday, and then to take off a few hours early.

This message was not communicated to Dwight -- probably because it has nothing to do with him.  We didn't leave him in the lurch, we didn't leave queues full of unanswered tickets, we left at roughly the same time they did (timezone difference and whatnot) on a slow day.  But he and his boss went fucking ballistic over it this morning, sending out angry E-Mails about how no one is to leave early without their permission.  (Samir said he wanted to respond with "Yes, Massa"; I wanted to respond with the bit where Scrooge rails about how Cratchit is taking advantage of him by taking Christmas off.  We both restrained ourselves.)

So, okay.  That in and of itself was annoying but something we could shrug off.  But THEN Dwight sends the three of us temps an E-Mail saying we need to resubmit our timesheets with the number of hours we actually worked, and THEN he'll send them in.

It was just pure, unadulterated dickishness.  Fucker finds a minor infraction like a dog finding a bone, and is willing to threaten our paychecks over what's got to be less than $300 out of the company's pocket.  (I should note, at this point, that we routinely receive truckloads of old equipment which we then unwrap, scan, restack, rewrap, and put on another truck for disposal.  The company blows probably seven figures a year on freight for shit that just gets sent to the scrap heap.  Squabbling over $300 is petty in every sense of the word.)

And, you know, he does it all in his corporate double-talk, addresses us as "Gentlemen", but pretty much suggests we're liars who are trying to scam the company.

And, you know, there's a way he could have been cool about all that.  He could have said, "Hey, guys, Jim never said anything about this to me, so I'm afraid I'm going to have to double-check with him before I submit those timesheets -- I trust you, but I have to follow procedure."  That would have achieved exactly the same result without the dickwaving and accusations of dishonesty.  (On the other hand, as one of the other temps suggested, the fact that Dwight didn't submit our timesheets in right away when we sent them to him last week suggests that this was premeditated, that he anticipated we were going to knock off early and was waiting to catch us at it.)

One of the other temps suggested, politely, that we shouldn't be penalized because our supervisor had told us to go home early.  Dwight shot back, "And did he say you should log it as a full day's work?"  I almost responded that there is really no other reasonable interpretation of a boss telling his employees to go home early on Christmas Eve, but managed to restrain myself.

Anyway, we eventually got ahold of Jim -- had to interrupt the poor bastard's vacation, and I'm betting he spent a couple hours on the phone with Dwight and upper management.  So we got it straightened out and I won't be losing any sleep over it tonight.

But sweet Jesus what an asshole.  What a petty little man, willing to make enemies of three people over a few hundred bucks' extra pay on Christmas Eve.

(Also, apparently Dwight told Jim that we left early while the service desk stayed behind and finished up an 8-hour shift.  This is completely false; we were the last people out of the building and the last service desk tech -- I'll call him Ryan to continue the Office motif -- left probably an hour before we did.  We asked Ryan's boss what Ryan told him, and he responded that he implied we'd kicked him out; didn't say so in so many words but hinted it pretty strongly.  I haven't heard Ryan's side of the story but that's pretty damn plausible; he's been throwing our guys under the bus since his first week on the job.)

Came home, drank beer and played Dragon Age instead of looking at job postings.  Not very disciplined of me, but damn it I needed to relax.  I'll look at job postings tomorrow.  Because I seriously do not deserve this shit.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 28, 2009, 09:12:07 PM
As you have posted with Mongrel-like loquaciousness, I shall respond with uncharacteristic brevity.

That cunt Dwight is no good.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on December 29, 2009, 08:43:32 PM
Dwight is one of those guys who isn't man enough to apologize or admit he's fucked up but will instead act extra-nice to you to try and make up for it.  The first thing in my inbox this morning was him telling me what a great job I'm doing with some extra duties I've taken on this week.

Later we had a phone conference between the two branches.  He was coming up with suggestions for things people could do if they ran out of tickets, because it's a slow week.  He commented that if we didn't have anything to do we'd have to start sending people home, and the temps would have to go first, and that he didn't want to send the temps home because they don't get PTO.

Seriously.  He said that.  The day after trying to dock all the temps three hours' pay.

Later in the meeting he said everyone could go home at 3 on Thursday.  And then added, "And put yourselves down for a full day on your timesheet.  Just so there are no questions about that."  Because, you know, there were all those questions about that yesterday.  From him.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 30, 2009, 04:19:55 AM
:lol:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 05, 2010, 08:06:20 AM
Hm. A new position has unexpectedly opened up in Sales that seems to mirror a lot of what I'm already doing as side-work.

Coincidentally, I got an email from my boss asking me to account for my work hours (what I'm doing, number of calls). Sure, my annual review is coming up in a month or so, but somehow I doubt that the whole story.

I THINK I'M GETTING A MESSAGE HERE. Though it would nice if it didn't come with a side order of HEART ATTACK.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on January 05, 2010, 01:54:36 PM
Don't understand fully.  Do you believe you may be getting ze boot?

Or getting a load off your shoulders?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on January 05, 2010, 02:34:04 PM
Sounds like a bunch of the stuff he's been having to do is getting tossed on a new position.  The panic is about not knowing yet whether that will include the rest of the stuff he's expected to do.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 05, 2010, 05:09:38 PM
Nono, two items happened near-simultaneiously.

Last week a job posting went up that basically reads as "The Stallion's* powder monkey". A lot of the work this entails is stuff I have been doing on the side in my current position. I was fairly certain I was going to apply, but was hesitating as I don't know what the pay range is (that's not really much of an objection as that would come out pretty quickly) and wasn't sure how much of an increase in workload it would be (it would be an increase for sure, which is not a huge deal so long as it's not a retarded increase - especially if it turns out that it's actually worth it, i.e. more moneys).

This morning, my current manager basically did what seems to come up every four-to-six months: asked me justify my existence. This provided me with a rather serindipitous reminder of the BEST reason to apply for the other job. Those kind of heart palpitations I don't need.

The reason I've been doing work for the sales force on the side is twofold. One, they had literally no other source for the information they needed, and two, I had the time. My manager would normally refuse to allow any employee of hers to be of service to Sales but it was grudgingly acnowledged several months ago as another way to occupy the time they know I have on my hands (i.e. if I only did my job as it exists on paper, I really WOULD have way too much free time).

Anyway, it'll be better if I can get the new position. If the Canadian and American operations are going to be locked in a smouldering cold war, at least I won't have to play double agent any more.

*see earlier entries in this thread.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on January 07, 2010, 09:34:58 AM
It's TWENTY DEGREES.  It's NOT ICY.  This is not a good reason to cancel school and work.  Even though I appreciated it. It's still retarded.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on January 07, 2010, 05:04:35 PM
I never knew that sun and warmth could turn someone into a giant pussy.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on January 07, 2010, 05:13:37 PM
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v200/zegim/nepolot/castlevania_dracula.jpg)...
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 07, 2010, 05:53:36 PM
I think she meant 20 degrees Fahrenheit, not Celcius.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on January 07, 2010, 06:12:13 PM
TWENTY DEGERES CKELVIN
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on January 07, 2010, 06:14:03 PM
funny story i had to look up athe temperateuwre to see if it was really fahtrenthiet or not and it was
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Walker on January 07, 2010, 08:44:37 PM
I wish it was 20 C here...  ::(:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on January 08, 2010, 08:50:59 AM
I've been cruising around in a goddamned fleece sweater in 20F weather. All I'm saying:
Huge blue icy balls here.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on January 08, 2010, 12:20:59 PM
I'm getting the feeling that I may be gradually fired from my job. I haven't had hours for the last two weeks; I called in today and there's no hours for me next week either. Last time I talked to my boss, she said they needed to cut hours.

Not sure how I became low rung on the totem pole.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on January 10, 2010, 12:14:51 PM
I apologize to any customer service reps I may have gotten a bit nuts on today.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 15, 2010, 01:59:45 PM
This morning was the usual :facepalm:-ery.

Network connection goes down. This includes all forms of internet connectivity, email, mainframe, etc. as well as my networked phone (I have two phones on my desk BECAUSE ONE GOES TO PRESIDENT OBAMA).

I call IT from my separate local phone (only thing still working). No reply. I do this again an hour and half later and harangue them (they like to ignore the Canadian office, they're also legitimately overworked). Finally get a response after three hours of the workday have gone. Problem is fixed about an hour later.

In the meantime I leave messages for my manager carefully explaining what's not working, so she knows why I am not logged in.

After the system comes up, my manager tells me that I shouldn't call these down, I should email them.

I have the temerity to point out that my email was down as well.

She replies "well, if the system is still down, you'd better send an email to IT now".

 :advice: :advice: :advice:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on January 15, 2010, 02:04:02 PM
Oh, that's beautiful.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on January 15, 2010, 04:48:24 PM
This morning was the usual :facepalm:-ery.

Network connection goes down. This includes all forms of internet connectivity, email, mainframe, etc. as well as my networked phone (I have two phones on my desk BECAUSE ONE GOES TO PRESIDENT OBAMA).

I call IT from my separate local phone (only thing still working). No reply. I do this again an hour and half later and harangue them (they like to ignore the Canadian office, they're also legitimately overworked). Finally get a response after three hours of the workday have gone. Problem is fixed about an hour later.

In the meantime I leave messages for my manager carefully explaining what's not working, so she knows why I am not logged in.

After the system comes up, my manager tells me that I shouldn't call these down, I should email them.

I have the temerity to point out that my email was down as well.

She replies "well, if the system is still down, you'd better send an email to IT now".

 :advice: :advice: :advice:

It could be that she was trying to cover your ass. IT could say you never called if someone up top asks why your branch wasn't productive all day, and then the blame could fall on your shoulders or your boss'. Email is a reproducable document. Even if they delete it it can be pulled from the system in most cases, and you of course have the copy you sent.

In my last job, we sent emails of transcripts or summaries after every phone call - if a customer or other employee tried to weasel out of a fee or insist on a company paid expedite (a thousand dollars the company had to shell out and a written warning to the employee responsible) we always wanted to have proof that that wasn't necessary or wasn't our fault.

I'm sure she was really just being a raging cunt, though.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Walker on January 15, 2010, 05:06:25 PM
Well, yeah, she was being a raging cunt because how the hell are you supposed to e-mail someone when you have no internet?  ::(:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on January 15, 2010, 05:24:46 PM
Hey Matt, can I have a job at your office?  :wakka:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 15, 2010, 05:34:02 PM
She's just a damned retard who often doesn't think before speaking. So... the usual kind of boss I get.

@ Princess: Only if you can speak fluent French, move to Toronto, and I get the new job with sales.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on January 15, 2010, 08:30:36 PM
:rolleyes: Boy!  It sure is boring doing this regression test.
:mahboi: Mah boi, this release is what all true coders strive for!
:rolleyes: I just wonder if {proprietary module name that actually does rhyme with Ganon} has been updated!

:rolleyes: WHAT THE F-
:itsatrap: :oh: :goggles: :ohshi~: :scanners: :dead: :gameover:

:mahboi: TESTER SAPPIN' MY ENTIRE WEBSITE!
:rolleyes: I murdered your toys as well!



Any day people are glad that I am a QA person is a day that I am not doing my job right.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 18, 2010, 07:33:16 AM
Oh man, toooooo good.

I have no access to our mainframe today. This one's for a totally different reason though: Some idiot let us run out of site licenses for our remote connect software.

The best part is that I had a valid one for the past year WHOOPS GUESS NOT ANYMORE. 

:facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm:



:lol: :rolleyes:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on January 18, 2010, 04:31:37 PM
So how long did you spend shooting staples into the garbage can?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 18, 2010, 06:23:37 PM
Staples into the garbage can? Pffftt... I didn't go to the trouble of surreptitiously installing photoshop on my work computer for nothing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on January 21, 2010, 05:43:29 PM
I'm going to get a new job in California.  Any ideas on how to go about this from out of state?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on January 21, 2010, 06:45:45 PM
Um. Don't.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: yyler on January 21, 2010, 07:16:43 PM
Don't.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on January 21, 2010, 07:17:39 PM
This is going to be one of the few times I concur with Norondor:  Don't


California is the least Governable state in the union, and is in the process of going downhill from there.  Unless you're going to a position where you're confident you can survive without any government assistance for sometime (outside of the normal roads and taxes), things are not looking that good.  I am assuming your dude is also in the process of changing jobs right now to that state and ditto with yourself, but the crystal ball of most half-decent weeklies say bad things ahead.  

Personally, survival without government assistance would be a shotgun, rifle of a 7.62x39 calibre, pistol, 1 week of food and water, an SUV capable of going off-road, clothing suitable for arid conditions, and a suitable stash of decent alcohol and dried goods for bargaining. 

I would also avoid living in LA at all costs, but that's only because they do not draw their water locally.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on January 21, 2010, 07:29:27 PM
So on the important subject of me, an update from this earlier status:


Further cuts from this article just happened (http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/Canada/2009/11/25/11932166.html).  This directly affects what I do as I will no longer be teaching before the summer camps open up. 

On the plus side, I now have more time this winter for homework!

Oh yes, more time for homework indeed! 

Heck, if the way the news is going on about it (http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/opinions/editorials/the-overburdened-army/article1438502/), I might even get a summer off from doing anything!  Better polish off my resume to apply for the Geological Survey of Canada before I lose any prospect of being empl..

 :nosir::  You're teaching a basic starting this weekend.  You're going to be a section commander. 

 :pop:

:nosir:: Starting this weekend

:pop:

:nosir:: And there's a good chance you're getting promoted

 :scanners:




Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on January 21, 2010, 07:38:21 PM
Back on the topic of MCE:

Don't.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on January 21, 2010, 10:55:47 PM
San Francisco is a lovely city. That said, anywhere you'd want to live is prohibitively expensive, and will slide into the ocean eventually anyway.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 22, 2010, 10:14:50 AM
So on the important subject of me, an update from this earlier status:


Further cuts from this article just happened (http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/Canada/2009/11/25/11932166.html).  This directly affects what I do as I will no longer be teaching before the summer camps open up. 

On the plus side, I now have more time this winter for homework!

Oh yes, more time for homework indeed! 

Heck, if the way the news is going on about it (http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/opinions/editorials/the-overburdened-army/article1438502/), I might even get a summer off from doing anything!  Better polish off my resume to apply for the Geological Survey of Canada before I lose any prospect of being empl..

 :nosir::  You're teaching a basic starting this weekend.  You're going to be a section commander. 

 :pop:

:nosir:: Starting this weekend

:pop:

:nosir:: And there's a good chance you're getting promoted

 :scanners:






NICE. :hi5:

And I ALSO agree with regards to MCE: DO NOT TAKE A JOB IN CA. DO NOT DO NOT DO NOT.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on January 22, 2010, 11:17:37 AM
Fortunately and unfortunately this is where things are heading for me.  I need a job in San Jose or somewhere thereabouts.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 25, 2010, 07:55:01 AM
So, kind of funny.

The Stallion's French is bad. Like REALLY BAD. But he's proud of his halting pidgin French, I guess.

He gets an email, which he forwards to me. The email says a customer wants to be billed in April for something they're going to order in March (so they can game their accounting), which we don't do. You buy it, you pay for it. I mean, they're basically asking for credit.

The Stallion can't read the email properly.

Me: "Hey, regarding the email you just sent. I just doublechecked with Finance and the invoice has to go when the stuff ships. Do you want to call them back or would you prefer I do it?"
Stallion: "No, no, I don't think the email says that at all. I think they want to move their shipment up to an earlier date is all."
Me: **rereads email to make sure I'm not being a gigantic retard** "Uh, no, she's asking us to delay her billing... tell you what, would you like me to give her a call?"
Stallion: "What are you going to say?" [OBVIOUS GLARE]
Me: "...

...

... I'll ask what date she wants the order changed to  :happy:."

:rolleyes:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 25, 2010, 02:02:07 PM
Hm! Today I was yelled at by my worthless manager (as usual) because I caught them not covering for me while I was off and they think I'm lying (even though it turned out that I had printed evidence BUT NEVER MIND THAT).

As an interesting bonus, she started throwing numbers at me, so I discovered that I work precisely half as hard* as any of the poor bastards in the US office who have to suffer under her daily.

 :perfect:

*(in terms of data entry numbers... jokes about goofing off all day aside, I just do lots of work for other departments to keep busy)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on January 25, 2010, 04:33:27 PM
I hope you're taking notes and gathering evidence.  It sounds like there might be knives out for you in the long run in that office.  I do hope that you can keep on top of it in the mean, however.

MCE:  Is this where the guy is headed?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on January 25, 2010, 05:28:07 PM
He has been living there for a year.  Also I want to get my MBA at Berkeley. Also, I am officially done with Oklahoma. :done:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 25, 2010, 08:20:22 PM
I hope you're taking notes and gathering evidence.  It sounds like there might be knives out for you in the long run in that office.  I do hope that you can keep on top of it in the mean, however.

There's just one knife, but it's long, sharp and weilded by someone with the social skills of a dented coffee table*

The big problem is that I really don't have anything else. I have milked the various iterations of "customer service jerkoff" to such an incredible degree that I probably make double what anyone else doing this has a right to (and what I can rightly epxect if I get fired). I lucksacked into a higher pay grade each of the last two times I was fired, I can hardly expect a threepeat.

I don't know, if I try to tell her what's wrong and needs fixing, I'm a belligerent retard who won't listen to the Rules. If I say nothing and and let things explode in everybody's face, I'm a slovenly, lazy asshole whose under-the-table schemes have been 'revealed'.

*She once blurted out "Wow you should stop eating before you get even fatter!" at an obese coworker at a Christmas party. Sadly, she's done nothing so obvious to me.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 25, 2010, 09:25:56 PM
Oh yeah, I almost forgot that I pretty much found out today that there's no way in hell I'll be able to get the new job, because university level French (i.e. suitable for legal documents and contracts) is a mandatory requirement.

My written is decently serviceable, but I won't pretend it's any better than high-school level.

Oh well, not much I can do there. At least I didn't lose it due to my WINNING PERSONALITY.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 26, 2010, 12:33:03 PM
Unaltered quote from an email to me from my Manager this afternoon:

Quote
Why do you always assume the customer is always right?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on January 26, 2010, 12:37:23 PM
She has a point.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 26, 2010, 02:04:18 PM
I suppose I could post the rest for context, but I'd rather not post a full work email here. It was pretty cartoonish. We are always right, they are always wrong, and anybody who doesn't like that can suck it. No compromise, no "let's see what might have gone wrong".

Suffice it to say that we have been very frequently wrong and many customers have proved this to us - in writing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on January 26, 2010, 02:07:02 PM
I wonder how many of them are still customers.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on January 26, 2010, 02:17:54 PM
I'm a big fan of firing customers.

Not ALL of them though.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 26, 2010, 02:23:23 PM
I wonder how many of them are still customers.

Well, disengaging from a medical supplier is a messy business, but suffice it to say that a lot of folks are quietly building their list of grievances for contract renewal time. If we don't shape the fuck up this year, it'll begin to tell come 2011.

Though amusingly enough I found out today that, the Canadian division is the company's most profitable division (but -you may recall - my manager is a member of the US operation). Considering I'm the entire customer service department for Canada, you'd think at least a tiny bit of credit would rub off there.

Hahahahahahaha.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on January 26, 2010, 07:48:38 PM
Oh wow.  A medical supply company? 

Are you any good with understanding how their logistical systems work, or that of the competing companies in terms of manpower, expenditures, transport systems and the like? 

You really should start studying the bits and pieces you can over the coming year.  It sounds like you have an opportunity landed from heaven. 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 26, 2010, 08:50:25 PM
Uh... Explain please?

I know something of our logistical madness, but nowhere near a full knowledge - that's almost entirely the warehouse's purview.

But it's not like there's too much to it. We pretty much just use UPS and then get mad when they fuck up. We don't use a dedicated medical carrier or anything as the cost-benefit is nowhere near what we get with joe-schmoe regular shipping. Even when we ship instruments it's just a special truck shipper.

I have no idea what competitors use.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on January 27, 2010, 06:45:17 AM
I'll pass explaining on these means.  Will follow up somewhere else when life on my end unclutters a mite.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on January 27, 2010, 02:02:58 PM
Ok, so wtf. I applied for a nonprofit fellowship position in NC that I'm easily qualified/perfect for. I get a phone interview, and it went well enough that they offered me an in-person second round interview. Problem was that I had to travel on my dollar to DC to do the interview. So whatevs, I assume that means they are probably going to give me the position if all goes well. I go, have an amazing interview, and today I get word that they aren't giving me the position.

Now, I understand that 1/2 the jobs I apply for I'm not a perfect fit for (rarely anyone is) and that it'd be a longshot, but I still can't figure out how to take it when I deserved it but didn't get it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on January 27, 2010, 05:01:21 PM
I'm convinced job interviews have a significant random factor. That, or there's always someone better qualified.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on January 27, 2010, 05:20:44 PM
You could have been... over-qualified?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on January 27, 2010, 05:42:50 PM
Or somebody's brother showed up the day after you.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on January 27, 2010, 05:49:04 PM
There's always a bigger fish.

The main thing is to not swim in the same pond as the bigger fish.

A lot of bigger fish have been forced to jump into smaller ponds, though.

All you can really do is keep trying other ponds until you find one that's gullible enough to believe your giant fish costume.

Glub.  Glub.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on January 27, 2010, 07:56:22 PM
or maybe I'll just get a job at Captain D's
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on January 30, 2010, 09:16:58 PM
so i started working at domino's pizza today as a driver

it was a slow night and my overall pay was about 70 dollars. I think I drove around 30-40 miles total.

my last job, i was a technical project coordinator - i coordinated operations between small and medium businesses, the company i contracted for, engineers with said company and engineers with local carriers (LECs) while processing orders through multiple order systems. this job usually requires a bachelor's degree. my overall daily pay was about 80 bucks. i had a 20 mile commute.

the primary difference here is that when i worked at my last job i was working 9 hours a day, and delivering pizzas i'm working 4-5. FML.


Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on January 31, 2010, 08:10:09 AM
Just wait until they come out with bachelors degrees in pizza delivery.

After sending multiple emails and leaving several voicemails, I finally got a hold of someone at that company who wasn't a spineless shitbag and who would give me an answer as to why they didn't hire me. The hiring director basically gave me a non-answer, but said a few things that hinted that it was because I wasn't willing to relocate. I was nothing but courteous; how is it so difficult to be honest with people these days?

Whatever. I have three or four interviews this week, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed. I've decided I'm not going to sell myself short with shit jobs until I am completely desperate in a month.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Walker on January 31, 2010, 10:22:39 AM
so i started working at domino's pizza today as a driver

it was a slow night and my overall pay was about 70 dollars.

I used to do that, and 70 dollars a day was a damn good haul when I was behind the wheel.  The problem is that customers are jerks and don't always tip anywhere near what they should.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on January 31, 2010, 10:29:09 AM
Telling someone that you aren't willing to commute a long distance/relocate is basically a death sentence.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on January 31, 2010, 12:25:15 PM
so i started working at domino's pizza today as a driver

it was a slow night and my overall pay was about 70 dollars.

I used to do that, and 70 dollars a day was a damn good haul when I was behind the wheel.  The problem is that customers are jerks and don't always tip anywhere near what they should.

I had a lady tip me 54 cents on a 60 dollar order. >:( I know pizza delivery isn't traditionally a 15% deal, but handing me a fiver would have been nice.


Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on January 31, 2010, 01:26:07 PM
Oh lord, I just found out that my interview tomorrow is with some non-profit funding scam org called The Fund For Public Interest. I guess I'll go, as it's a bit too late to cancel now, but it's going to be awkward.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on January 31, 2010, 02:19:55 PM
Why is it too late to cancel? What are they gonna do, not hire you?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on January 31, 2010, 03:49:02 PM
Well I'm 99% unlikely to take the job, but they likely know other people in the area and I'd like for there to be a good connotation attached to my name as much as possible. It can't hurt to do the interview, I suppose, and the more practice I get the better.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on January 31, 2010, 05:31:52 PM
What is an appropriate delivery tip?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on January 31, 2010, 06:32:01 PM
Three bucks at the minimum.  Even if they got there a bit late, it's usually a backup with the restaurant and not the driver themselves.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on January 31, 2010, 06:40:48 PM
Unless it's a Pizza Hut who for the life of them cannot figure out that the address you put in your online order is the one they should deliver to and not the address you lived at 4 years ago
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Pacobird on January 31, 2010, 06:50:41 PM
The hiring director basically gave me a non-answer, but said a few things that hinted that it was because I wasn't willing to relocate. I was nothing but courteous; how is it so difficult to be honest with people these days?

I'm sorry you didn't get the job, but why should honesty mitigate the fact that you aren't willing to go where they'd be hiring you to go?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on January 31, 2010, 07:24:34 PM
The job was posted for Raleigh, NC where I now live and where they are hiring for. I'm not available to move to any other states at the present, but I don't see it terribly offensive of myself to expect to be considered for a job that is twenty minutes from my house. I have no idea what their deal is.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on January 31, 2010, 07:45:41 PM
i made 110 dollars in six hours tonight.
 :richiam:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on January 31, 2010, 08:29:27 PM
i made 110 dollars in six hours tonight.
 :richiam:

I... still haven't gotten even the slightest bit of response from a job in nearly a year!
WOOHOO! :hi5: :oh: :sadpanda:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on January 31, 2010, 09:43:48 PM
After the system comes up, my manager tells me that I shouldn't call these down, I should email them.

I have the temerity to point out that my email was down as well.

She replies "well, if the system is still down, you'd better send an email to IT now".

 :advice: :advice: :advice:

I'm pretty sure I've mentioned before that there was at least one person at my last job who would consistently E-Mail me to tell me the mail server was down.

She would also call me and ask "Is the server down?"  No matter how many times I explained to her that I sat in a room literally full of servers and needed more specificity.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on February 01, 2010, 01:49:44 AM
I don't see it terribly offensive of myself to expect to be considered for a job that is twenty minutes from my house. I have no idea what their deal is.
And you were considered.  An interview for any real position is going to be dependent not only on your answers but how you give them, and furthermore you have no idea why you actually didn't get the position and it is not at all uncommon for employers to be vague or misleading on that regard for fear of discriminatory hiring lawsuits.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 01, 2010, 05:51:58 AM
Just using this thread as a public tout/tote board for my meeting this morning.

Mongrel's chances:

Specific threat of gettin' fired - 2:1
General vague spineless threats that are the same as above without actually saying so - 4:1
Actually gettin' shitcanned - 10:1
Nothing of incident happens - 15:1

The upside here is that I'm either in good shape at work or I'm a good gambler. Take your victories where you can get 'em, I guess?


Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 01, 2010, 11:22:49 AM
Huh, rescheduled twice and pushed to tomorrow.

I think we can downgrade that 10:1 to a 25:1
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on February 01, 2010, 11:50:41 AM
If I might ask, what are you worried about your job being threatened for? Is it just a 'nature of the beast' type of deal, with the people you work for, or did something happen you might be getting that warning about?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 01, 2010, 02:33:01 PM
Some new rules are being instituted with regards to customer stuff (doesn't really matter what).

Last week I kept asking my manager in various ways what happens in a couple of situations that the new rules don't address. Not tryin' to troll, it's just that my choices are "be the messenger who gets shot now" vs. "be the scapegoat later". If those rule breakdowns were not addressed, it could have cost us thousands of dollars and possibly lost us some customers.

Instead of answering the question, she just kept getting mad and just sends copy-pasted replies that say THIS IS ANOTHER EXAMPLE OF YOUR REFUSAL TO OBEY THE RULES, which pretty obvious code for "I am making a written record so I can back my decision up if I decide to fire you". It's even funnier when you consider that I'm one of the best enforcers of policy we have and do not in fact have some kind of sordid history as a rogue agent.

Anyway, that's pretty vague without specifics, so I'm not sure how useful this explanation is. Suffice it to say that my manager has the usual boring brace of bad-office-manager traits. 

Oh and the week before last, I was away for half the week. Someone in my office is supposed to send stuff to the Head Office in my absence. Well, nobody really did anything at the head office while I was away, so I mentioned it. Probably not the brightest idea, but again, I didn't bring it up to be a pissant, but because some of these things are time-sensitive orders for hospitals - making sure shit gets done means more than just fewer papers on my desk when I come back.

Anyway, they blamed the person in my office for sending things late, when I actually had printed confirmations that everything was sent in a good and timely fashion. But who cares if you've got evidence! Haha! Never mind that noise, it's all my fault anyway and why am I causing trouble? Anyway, that's no surprise, I figured they'd interpret THAT as an attack even though it wasn't meant as one. 

LOL

*Or would have. I got an update today that the rules were being clarified to address the situations I was asking about. So SOMEBODY finally listened to my questions - only nobody actually stood up and said so. They just presented me with a revised set of rules... and didn't even call it revised. Ha!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on February 01, 2010, 02:57:56 PM
 :tldr: You didn't include a cover sheet with your TPS reports.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on February 01, 2010, 03:22:25 PM
Hey Buge, was there any followup to your work situation where you got boned with ministaffing?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on February 01, 2010, 04:11:19 PM
Nope. Still boned.

I'm on the schedule, but no hours.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 01, 2010, 05:54:38 PM
I thought you did get some hours after all but had to turn them down?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 01, 2010, 05:55:59 PM
Yeah, the other day I described my job to The Stallion as "kicking beehives".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on February 01, 2010, 07:55:53 PM
I thought you did get some hours after all but had to turn them down?

That I did. Nothing since then.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on February 02, 2010, 11:15:15 AM
Woooooo, just followed up on a part-time job that I had applied for being a rock climbing wall attendant and found out that I got the job. It's only probably ten hours a week, but it's at least a start and an awesome way to make supplemental income.

Now if I can find a regular 9-5. I have an interview set up for tomorrow with a think tank for some sort of support position that sounds interesting.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 02, 2010, 02:32:22 PM
Well, I am a poor gambler, but still gainfully employed. Fair trade.

Also, quality performance reviews with giant AOL-style smiley faces make [internet meme] cry.

If only I could get that damned woman to friggin call me more often. I think our relationship would be a lot better if I could actually just TALK to her more than once every six bloody months (this is not an exaggeration: the last time I actually just talked to her was JULY, and I wouldn't have even gotten any calls now if it wasn't for this latest round of bullshit). I know I'm supposed to operate pretty independently, but I don't think that say, calls once a month means I have to have my hand held.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on February 06, 2010, 10:21:11 PM
Today, after...
8 months, 27 days, and roughly...19 hours I am employed!
 :victory:
Walked into this pizzeria and asked if they were hiring me.
After less then three minutes he told me I started tonight.
Pure. Charisma.
Also: I make $8 (minus the communal tip thingy they do) while a good chunk of them make $5 (minus the tip thingy). And they are family.
It's a good job, great atmosphere, good pay with flexible hours.
I am one happy Lottel right now.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on February 06, 2010, 10:56:55 PM
Today, after...
8 months, 27 days, and roughly...19 hours I am employed!
 :victory:
Walked into this pizzeria and asked if they were hiring me.
After less then three minutes he told me I started tonight.
Pure. Charisma.
Also: I make $8 (minus the communal tip thingy they do) while a good chunk of them make $5 (minus the tip thingy). And they are family.
It's a good job, great atmosphere, good pay with flexible hours.
I am one happy Lottel right now.



awwwwwww yeeahhhhhhhhhhh

IN OTHER NEWS: My boss has told me to stop all work on our client. This probably means she has lost our client and I'm probabbblyy out of a job?? maybee?? Anyways while I've been waiting on her call I've been basically going on the three-day drinking binge I never got around to experiencing while occasionally poking about for ALT EMPLOYMENT

I still have that depression center thing but that's not on the regular, so WE'LL SEE. I think I've found a job doing the newsletter for a local hospital that seems right up my alley.

In the internem I have not shaved in about a week and I think I might keep it like this. I look like House M.D.

Sexy as hell.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on February 07, 2010, 12:56:41 PM
Anyone know any technical writers?

IF SO, are they:



    -  OR  -

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on February 07, 2010, 01:41:57 PM
The ones at Pana are pretty happy, but they get paid a lot to be that way.  I don't think things would be the same otherwise.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 23, 2010, 06:45:10 AM
A person's annual review probably shouldn't fill them with such stark, abject terror as I am currently experiencing in anticipation of this afternoon. That's really just not healthy.

Especially when I haven't even done anything "wrong" lately.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on February 23, 2010, 07:40:41 AM
Got a brag sheet?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 23, 2010, 07:56:29 AM
A brag sheet at this place. That's pretty funny! :lol:

There's no point when you know that anything you can claim as a positive can somehow be flipped as a negative. Really the best thing is just to keep my head down.

It's been slowly dawning on us here in the Canadian office just how bad things have become down in the US. Their offices are a nightmare of finger pointing and blame trading, where every department is understaffed by at least 30% and every employee has mounds of work that's only done when someone starts screaming at them. If ANY of us were down there we probably would have resigned some time ago.



In a more humourous vein... there's this silly bitch responsible for inputting pricing. She LOVES throwing work out on technicalities. Well, today was an amusing new low.

Customer is up for renewal. I had attached a list of a customer's old/current pricing to the email chain. Sales rep replies that to make things easy he's just going to give them a blanket 3% increase on everything.

Silly bitch replies to the sales rep (who is away at a sales meeting and can only reply at night anyway) "please provide pricing with 3% added".

Like, I get that she doesn't appreciate being dumped on, but how hard is it to calculate a 3% increase on a handful of prices? I had never before used Excel to calculate Product Sum and I had the Excel function figured out and a list of prices sent back to her in under two minutes. It's not even like anybody had to multiply a whopping ten items by hand.

I mean, I know people make bullshit excuses all the time at work, but can you at least go to the trouble of coming up with remotely credible ones?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 23, 2010, 11:46:04 AM
I am an adequate employee and will receive the basic mandated 3% annual raise. Terror aside, this wasn't too unexpected (I knew the fear was irrational, but with how badly things are going no-news-is-(usually)-good-news).

The keen part is that it's retroactive to January 1st on my next paycheque.  :8D:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on February 23, 2010, 03:33:06 PM
Sounds to me like "adequate" means "the place would fall apart without you but we can't afford to tell it to your face".

At least I hope it means you can de-stress a little!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on February 23, 2010, 04:02:14 PM
For some reason, the parable of the Finnish boy with his finger in the dyke comes to mind.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 23, 2010, 04:02:57 PM
Oh yeah, I get what Mongrel's saying. Morale is so bad where I work I can think of only two people who aren't actively looking for work. Like, browsing want ads on traceable company internet because they don't give a damn. It's enough to make a body take out thousands of dollars in loans to go back to college. :/
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 23, 2010, 04:03:48 PM
Classic I heard she decked that kid </oldestjoke>
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 23, 2010, 04:54:49 PM
Yeah, all of us in the Canadian office are pretty damned thankful we don't actually work in the US office. The same as R^2 mentioned, they've been hemorraging employees down south. Among other things, the two top salesmen in the US resigned simultaneously on January 1st, and over the course of February, I've seen enough postings go up for Finance positions that they're replacing at least a quarter of the department (and I personally know more people in that department who're looking...).

I'd go back to school myself, but I'm still payin' the loans from the last round. To say nothing of having gotten used to an income nearly three times what I had in university.

It's not so bad though. Once Starr can legally work in Canada, our options should get better.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 23, 2010, 05:39:09 PM
"Hemorrhaging down south" makes things sound even more unpleasant than they are.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ocksi on February 23, 2010, 09:03:46 PM
Oh yeah, I get what Mongrel's saying. Morale is so bad where I work I can think of only two people who aren't actively looking for work. Like, browsing want ads on traceable company internet because they don't give a damn. It's enough to make a body take out thousands of dollars in loans to go back to college. :/
I know a lot of people who are taking on pretty good sized student loans because, while somewhat constricting, they come with a low-ish rate in a lot of cases.  Said friends thus cash out their loans on purchasable goods (money orders, cashiers checks, cash advances, etc) before they're done with school and have a good chunk of savings for when they're in the in-between school and working their chosen career.  This loan advance allows them to live for a while and actively seek a position they choose, using part of the loan to keep the loan from default if they can't find what they want, and thus extend their job search until they can avoid something they don't want to do.

Two out of five of said friends have actually done it smoothly, and the rest aren't far out of school.  Doesn't seem like a bad plan!  That said, it's only a plan for those responsible enough to actually finish the school and then actually work for the jobs they're after.

All told, though, it'd still be better to get student loan reform going!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 24, 2010, 01:52:41 PM
So it turns out that my schedule flexibility was the only thing our manager had to keep things together. Now that I need days off for classes he's finally gotten around to hiring someone to replace the three people who have left in the past two months. Only I'm STILL part-time and not eligible for benefits, and him not offering me to pick up FT is glossing over stated company policy for the fifth time. Last I counted there were five days in the week that are not Tuesday and Thursday!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 24, 2010, 01:58:39 PM
There is also a new No Earplugs policy meaning I am slowly going deaf for nine dollars an hour.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 24, 2010, 02:45:28 PM
Wait... no earplugs?

What do you do again?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 24, 2010, 03:11:38 PM
I daycare dogs in a dog daycare. For those unaware toy poodles have been banned as cruel and inhumane by the Geneva convention.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 24, 2010, 04:18:22 PM
 :ohgod:

On a more serious note, you could probably raise that with your local workplace safety board. I'm pretty sure that bans on protective equipment of any kind usually get those folks in a lather.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on February 24, 2010, 04:44:48 PM
Protective equipment is different from earplugs, though.  Not being able to hear the dogs can defeat the purpose of the job.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 24, 2010, 05:04:24 PM
We are tehnically allowed earplugs but not during any activity where dogs are likely to bark. 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on February 24, 2010, 05:39:52 PM
We are tehnically allowed earplugs but not during any activity where dogs are likely to bark. 
So not when the dogs are alive?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on February 24, 2010, 06:23:42 PM
You'd have to be using some pretty amazing earplugs to block out dog barking.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 24, 2010, 07:32:58 PM
Blocking them out entirely isn't the goal. Cutting the volume by about thirty decibels so it's not actually painful to stand in the rooms with kennels is all I want.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 24, 2010, 07:33:09 PM
Protective equipment is different from earplugs, though.  Not being able to hear the dogs can defeat the purpose of the job.

Plenty of earplugs don't block all sound. There are lots of earplugs that only kick in to cut off high-decibel noise. Look for the fancy ones like these:

(http://image.motorcyclecruiser.com/f/8838266/0710_crup_02_z+motorcycle_safety_hearing_protection+ear_plugs_set_2.jpg)

Sure, they cost more than the regular foam kind, but they're reuseable and if you buy your own, there should be no trouble.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 24, 2010, 07:37:44 PM
I use(d to use) the ones made of soft silicone. They're cheap and disposable and don't ream out your ear canal after you wear them several days in a row.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on February 24, 2010, 08:02:28 PM
Hrm, I applied for a shift supervisor position at Caribou Coffee and got a call back immediately. I have an interview tomorrow. Not really what I want to do, but it'll pay the bills until I find a real job, I suppose.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 25, 2010, 03:51:10 AM
WTF Spaco and Geo I've been looking for a job since September and here you two are all "They called me back!" Grr
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on February 25, 2010, 02:02:25 PM
The IT guys just ran in unexpectedly, asked for Yevgen, and unplugged his work laptop and then took it away.  They said it had a really bad virus on it.  Yevgen says it's because he's Ukrainian and they don't allow them to use computers if they can help it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on February 25, 2010, 02:16:05 PM
WTF Spaco and Geo I've been looking for a job since September and here you two are all "They called me back!" Grr

We are hiring!
 :nyoro~n:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 25, 2010, 04:27:13 PM
The IT guys just ran in unexpectedly, asked for Yevgen, and unplugged his work laptop and then took it away.  They said it had a really bad virus on it.  Yevgen says it's because he's Ukrainian and they don't allow them to use computers if they can help it.

That's AWE.SOME.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on February 25, 2010, 07:17:30 PM
Why aren't Ukrainians allowed to use computers? I don't get it.

R^2: I think the job market here is a bit better than Atlanta, from what I gather. Also considering I have a bachelors degree with a bit of graduate credit and haven't been able to land any job thus far that pays more than $9 an hour, I'd still say it's a pretty dire situation.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on February 26, 2010, 06:23:13 AM

Quote
The Ukraine is a high risk nation for fraud and scams, many of which are modeled after fraud operations in Russia.

I copied that from the internet
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on February 26, 2010, 06:26:16 AM
I concur with this statement based on experience around their military.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 26, 2010, 07:16:57 AM
I also concur with this statement based on... every Ukrainian I have known who knew how to turn a computer on.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on February 26, 2010, 02:17:33 PM
Overheard at work today: "Man, the DS had a lot of potential, too bad it got crushed by the PSP."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on February 26, 2010, 10:25:14 PM
I spoke too soon; I'm apparently too overqualified to be hired by Caribou. =/
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 28, 2010, 12:00:53 PM
Double-shift today because my boss forgot the days I have class. I told him last Sunday and wrote it down on the paper he always checks before writing the schedule. So double shift. And the dogs range from "Only mostly intolerable" to "Utter bastards".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 28, 2010, 12:01:59 PM
Also fuck policy they're not paying me enough for tinnitus and migraines.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on February 28, 2010, 05:42:37 PM
What classes are you taking?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on February 28, 2010, 05:50:54 PM
And the dogs range from "Only mostly intolerable" to "Utter bastards".

Are you trying to tell me that the people who take their dogs to day care are the same kind of people who don't train them well?  This is ridiculous.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 01, 2010, 12:37:50 PM
I know, totally mindblowing shit here.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 01, 2010, 12:38:39 PM
Wait a minute don't you have a little yapfactory terrier you spoil rotten
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 01, 2010, 12:39:01 PM
YOU'RE ONE OF THEM NOOOOOO
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on March 01, 2010, 12:46:10 PM
He thinks he is spoiled but he knows his place.  And his place is sitting at home, alone, and not barking because he knows it's against the rules.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 01, 2010, 01:14:32 PM
Oh OK then.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on March 02, 2010, 01:36:38 PM
So our new intern is 5 feet tall.  5 feet tall!  and let me tell you, I don't see short people very often, and it's weird looking.  Like, she's tiny.  Seriously my whole self concept has been shaken.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on March 02, 2010, 01:38:15 PM
Incidentally, my concept of you is also been shaken.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on March 02, 2010, 01:39:43 PM
look it's just weird looking okay and nobody ever told me that before
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on March 02, 2010, 01:41:04 PM
No, we know. Us normal sized people laugh at short people because they make us feel better about not being tall.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: yyler on March 02, 2010, 02:20:12 PM
I'm six and a half feet tall, want to hang out (because if you aren't hanging from above me you won't be able to look at me)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 03, 2010, 06:40:23 AM
I'm over six feet tall. I dated a girl for a few years who was about five-foot-nothin'. The top of her head was, like, barely chest level.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on March 03, 2010, 06:51:42 AM
 ::(:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 03, 2010, 01:31:38 PM
If these guys bother you too much you can just climb up their backs and stab them in the magic seals.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 06, 2010, 01:04:23 PM
In this corner, a sociopathic lab who can't go out in a group because he starts chompin' dogs on sight. In this corner, a dog who gets his jollies by opening other dog's kennels and going inside to see if they want to play or share food. Today is gonna be great.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on March 06, 2010, 01:44:45 PM
Dog 2 seems like a delight in less "ruin is impending" circumstances.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 06, 2010, 02:54:14 PM
Dog 2 is awful for various other reasons.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 06, 2010, 03:23:08 PM
The tiny hole on the back of my jeans leveled up into a full-fledged tear. Now I have three-plus hours of fighting off the lustful advances of my coworkers entranced by my shapely buttocks and stylish undergarments.

 Also a dog peed on my shoe while I typed that.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on March 07, 2010, 02:21:37 AM
I live in a small town, too far out from the closest big city to be called suburbia but not far enough out to be rural. This works out in my favor because it means I work for a company that actually delivers pizzas.

Well, because of our not quite rural but not quite suburb status, our delivery area is HUGE. Like, 6 mile radius around the building, and a lot of these houses are off county roads in the middle of fucking nowhere. A long delivery is about 6-8 miles there and the same back. Well, I had a delivery today out to one of those far out destinations, an extremely high end housing development. (We have a lot of these - just outside of the city of sapulpa where I live, and just outside of Tulsa so they can dodge city taxes, lots of million+ dollar homes) Well, I pull up, get no answer at the door, call the customer and find out the idiot who took the order didn't make sure our information was up to date.

Turns out that I'd driven to the far southeast corner of our delivery radius - literally, as far away from the store as I could possibly go - only to have our customer actually be located at the far northwest corner of our delivery radius.

 :whoops:

I missed out on about four deliveries because of this. The customer tipped me quite nicely when I finally arrived with their pizza, but for fuck's sake - the 8 bucks total I made from that delivery does not make up for the 25 I missed out on fucking around the far reaches of this town. Needless to say I told the manager about it and the lazyass teenager who forgot to update the address got chewed out.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on March 07, 2010, 03:25:49 AM
We used to get special orders from this one customer who always ordered a.) after our delivery window closed at night and b.) lived substantially (a couple of miles) outside of our delivery radius and c.) never tipped more than a buck or two and d.) was a friend of the owner so I couldn't actually say "go fuck yourself" about e.) all of the above every time I got stuck working an hour longer than usual because this jackass wanted some sweet and sour chicken.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on March 07, 2010, 10:01:36 PM
Well, I got demoted to server! Yes. Demoted.
Because apparently, I was a shittier cook than what he wanted.

It wasn't a "You have a lot of server experience and are good with people and we need a server tonight" thing. It was a "You aren't working out in the kitchen. We're sticking you in the dining room."

And the best part? The condescending "Can you handle that?" when shown to my area. All four tables.

I had a 7 hour shift. TWO tables.  I got nice tips and they told the manager how great I did but still.  We had a slow night, but the other servers got a slow, steady stream of tables. It wouldn't have killed to at least given me a table an hour.

And now I have to show up tomorrow at 11 to get them ready for a reception.  So no DnD. Which is fine because apparently 3 other people can't show up either.

That happened today.
This weekend has graced me with a dramatic hour cut. I went from working a 27+ hour weekend to a 12 hour weekend.  We hired a lot more people, which is great. 27+ was tough. But I think a lot of it has to do with his... dislike of my kitcheneering and me taking the weekend off last weekend.
I mean, I told him a month in advance and put it in a few different spots (all of them correct places to put time off) but apparently, they weren't prepared well enough. And I'm the only person to actually take time off since the place opened. So I guess he wasn't happy with me.

Here's to hoping my awesome job doesn't start sucking horribly for some weird reason!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Doom on March 07, 2010, 10:07:12 PM
Quote
Here's to hoping my job doesn't start sucking horribly for some weird reason!

Yet you just described a classic management technique of making you so miserable you quit.

Ride it out, it's definitely possible to have one unusually bad week.  Maybe get a resume ready.

If it keeps up or you start getting ridiculously bad hours, start browsing. Don't quit early if you can help it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on March 08, 2010, 02:22:42 AM
Yeah, dude, your job is done. If your manager is anything like my manager, (s)he is probably talking to their closer about how shocked they are you haven't quit yet. "Why won't he get the hint?" etc

I basically just had this conversation with her two days ago.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 08, 2010, 08:41:01 AM
Document all that happens. When you apply for unemployment or whatever you have to, your reason for leaving is "forced quit". When someone asks what that means, show them how your job personally was made untenable.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on March 09, 2010, 12:06:04 AM
I am not going to say the thought hasn't crossed my mind.
But that's not the boss's style.  If he was going to fire me, he'd make sure I'd A. Deserve it badly and B. Know exactly what the fuck I did wrong and rub my nose in it.  That may paint him in a bad light, but he's a good guy.
I actually think that it's just the opposite of what you may think. See, I got the job because the boss likes me. I disagree with him that I am a shitty cook but whatever. If he didn't want me around, he'd have gotten rid of me like the other shitty cooks we've lost in the last 2-3 weeks. We go through them quickly. I think that he didn't like my cooking abilities but wanted to keep me around so he made me a server.
Which is fine. I am a damn good server. I just don't like a few things.
1. The bitch slap way of changing my job.
2. The big cut in hours.
3. The lack of tables I got.

I'm pretty sure the cut in hours has a lot to do with the fact we hired a bunch more people. I mean, when I started there were 8 employees. Total. And most of those were family. Now we are close to 20. Gonna talk to him tomorrow about numbers 1 and 3 though. If I'm not getting as many hours, I better get a shitton of tables. And I'll tell him off for not telling me to my face about him thinking I'm a shitty cook.
And he'll actually appreciate that. Then I guess I'll just try to weasel my way back onto the maketable and cook shit when it's not important. Hopefully I'll get back to being a cook soon enough.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 09, 2010, 12:10:09 AM
These posts would be pretty boring if not for the Alton Brown avatar.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on March 09, 2010, 08:49:22 AM
I have been waiting for my manager to stop talking to the other manager about mundane and mindless topics for 48 minutes so I can ask her a question so I can actually work.  Because if I don't sit here doing nothing and go forward without her "okay" then I'm being inefficient and get griped at for not managing my time well.  Over the past week she has spent an average of 3 hours a day outside her office, talking with people about her kids and the sports they play. 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on March 09, 2010, 08:55:32 AM
To elaborate because, god, she just won't shut up:  If the difference in a 90 and 95% confidence level is 25 more transactions to test, I could easily get that done in the time I've spent waiting to ask her which sample size she prefers.  But if I do a 95% testing she will say I've wasted time by doing too many transactions... even though I've gotten it done in less time.  And if I do 90% she is mad that I didn't get her approval to do a smaller testing.

and

god
can I just
do my work
or sit here
and oh my god can anybody in this office actually do something for a change
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on March 09, 2010, 10:53:12 AM
Sweet! Just got hired as an "Associate Education Editor"!

35K a year and benefits doing something I'm good at is a definite step up from like 1K a month doing freelancing. Maybe I can start not feeling terrible about spending any money now!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 09, 2010, 11:25:16 AM
Nicely done ole' bean. :hi5:

And wow, yeah that company REALLY needs to look at a name change. They sound like the villain in a video game.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 09, 2010, 12:02:08 PM
:hi5:

 I've been killing time between classes following up on job applications, saying hi to chefs and kitchen managers. I'm in my culinary uniform, so hey no better time.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 09, 2010, 12:08:51 PM
Oh for Pete's sake.

Look dude. Maybe you were strapped for time or something, but the cardboard box for a Gateway PC with a handle made out of packing tape is NOT a briefcase.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on March 09, 2010, 12:37:13 PM
Please tell me he was also wearing an ill-fitting plaid tweed blazer with strange stains on it and he was muttering stuff under his breath.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 09, 2010, 12:46:29 PM
The other stuff is a miss, but he DID have a tweed blazer! Brown checks!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 10, 2010, 10:31:38 AM
Oh man, I feel for The Stallion.

See, we shitcanned our sales rep for Quebec a month and a half ago, so he has to cover for that position until they find a new one. The Stallion technically speaks French, but he's TERRIBLE at it.

There aren't many sights sadder than a man trying to maintain his dignity through an important phone call with a translation dictionary on their lap.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on March 10, 2010, 11:59:22 AM
I just confronted my manager about his unprofessional behavior and off-color remarks towards me over the last six months.  This was after consulting HR about specific incidents where I was offended.  They were ready to speak to him to start taking action, but offered to let me confront him and resolve the matter.  If at any point I am unhappy with further behavior or find his apology insincere, HR action continues.

Confronting your superior when they don't think they've done anything wrong is the hardest thing I have ever done.  I was raised the son of a military man where you do not question authority.

I don't have to like my boss to work with my boss.  I at least want to be able to respect his professional capabilities and that became difficult since these matters started.

I'd love to look for another job.  Anybody knows of places around the states looking for a microsoft shop oriented programmer, I'm open to leads.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 10, 2010, 12:17:46 PM
Ouch. That's rough to do.

What kind of stuff was he doing? Just being generally ig'rant or was it something specifically targeted at you? Situations where a manager doesn't realize they're doing something wrong are pretty much textbook stuff for HR courses on "How not to be a fuckheaded manager".

You don't have to say or be specific if it makes you uncomfortable at all, I'm just curious about what you had to put up with/how dumb this guy is.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on March 10, 2010, 01:31:36 PM
As far as leads go, there are a ton of tech companies down here in NC in the Research Triangle Park and I've seen a lot of job listings for Microsoft programmers and such.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ocksi on March 10, 2010, 05:51:49 PM
Yeah, that's where I live.  Technical jobs are always abound in RTP.  We also have three major universities always hiring.  We're basically the only part of NC not killing for any sort of jobs.  And if you need to come out for interviews, etc, you can stay at my place and also we can go drink a multitude of goodbeers, which flow like water in this town.

Also, Spaco is Carolinian?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on March 10, 2010, 06:28:49 PM
Spaco is a recent Carolinian. I just moved down here from Memphis and I'm living in Carrboro at the moment. Huh! Thought I was the only one! We'll have to meet up some time.


MMJ: Also, we have a very healthy gaming community here from board games to miniatures to roleplaying, for what that's worth.
:itsmagic:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on March 10, 2010, 06:43:43 PM
Spaco is a recent Carolingian.

 :oh:


(http://www.freedombiblecollege.org/images/kneel.jpg) Your majesty!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ocksi on March 10, 2010, 07:06:22 PM
Spaco is a recent Carolinian. I just moved down here from Memphis and I'm living in Carrboro at the moment. Huh! Thought I was the only one! We'll have to meet up some time.


MMJ: Also, we have a very healthy gaming community here from board games to miniatures to roleplaying, for what that's worth.
:itsmagic:
I live on the Carrboro/Chapel Hill border, right off Rosemary.  Should most def get up sometime.

Oh, our Thursday night game night is... tomorrow!  Just sayin'.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on March 10, 2010, 08:53:43 PM
Guess who received disciplinary action?

 ::(:

During the jokefest that is my job (literally. Part of my job is telling as many jokes as I can) apparently I made a comment to the other server that she took offense too. I am pretty sure it was me saying "Aren't magician's assistants supposed to be beautiful?" after she was begging the magician to let her be his assistant. She called me an asshole and I laughed. A minute later she said she was offended and I apologized, said I was just joking and that I'd make sure to not say anything like that again. She said it was fine, as long as I apologized.


After a while the boss calls me over and tells me that I can't be making those kinds of comments to members of the opposite sex.  Apparently she went to him after we talked and said something.  I got he "sexual harassment" talk. And how I was the last person he'd suspect of saying something like that. I told him I apologized for joking that she wasn't a beautiful woman and that I'd watch it.  He gave me a funny look. And then I had to go help my table and do my job so I don't know what happens from that.

ON TOP OF THIS I had 3 tables in 5 hours. Three. See, we have designated areas.  And  only one table sat in my area. Well, that's not true. Tables in my area were given to other people. One of my tables didn't tip. The other tables tip didn't go to me. It went to the fucking magician after he did 5 minutes of card tricks. I waited on those guys for 2 hours. Other table was a good tip.
So to break it down: I made 13 dollars in tips in 5 hours. I get paid server wage. I told the boss I better have gotten a tip for the table. He gave me $10 FOR HELPING THE MAGICIAN.

I remembered when I loved my job and everyone loved me.
It was last Friday.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on March 11, 2010, 03:34:15 AM
Jesus christ, would you quit already?

I know you think your boss wouldn't screw you over like that because he's a nice guy and he likes you, but he's got a boss too, and if he thinks you're not working out but can't find a reason to fire you, this is what he's going to do to you. The fact that he's nice and likes you is even more of a reason he'd do this kind of thing, becuase, simply, he could be too nice to fire you but not so nice that he'd be willing to take a hit because of it.

You could be making more money as a dishwasher at any joint in town, and a LOT more money doing pizza delivery, and both of those jobs are in industries with unbelievable turnover, so the jobs are certainly out there. But right now you're essentially just wasting your time with this position - if you can't make any money and your boss isn't taking you seriously as an employee, it's time to leave. If you do stick around and simply weather through this bullshit, it's not going to make your boss and the other employees respect you, it's just going to make them think they can walk all over you whenever they feel like it. And to be honest, if I was in their shoes, I would be getting the same impression.

Speaking of easy jobs with infinite turnover, I'm now a full time driver (25-30 hrs/wk) making as much as I was making at my last full time job (40 hrs/wk) regularly, which is roughly 26k/yr. Not bad!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 11, 2010, 06:46:18 AM
100% correctness
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on March 11, 2010, 10:36:05 AM
Well, Shinra: 70% correctness. He doesn't have a boss.
This is a tiny family business.
But yeah. If things aren't better next time I work, I'm talking to the boss and telling him that I'm done if there is no improvement.

Gonna give them a chance to improve.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 13, 2010, 11:41:09 AM
I can't decide if getting fired from the worst job imaginable is Good Tiiimes or a Shit Day, so I'll just mention it here.

"Somebody saw you do this egregiously terrible unforgiveable thing."
"I didn't actually. Here are several holes in that story."
"We don't believe you. GTFO."

Also it turns out there was some sort of HILARIOUS MISUNDERSTANDING where they thought the company was being super-forgiving to a terrible employee while I thought I was an upstanding guy and the company was fucking me like a two-dicked billygoat.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on March 13, 2010, 12:27:56 PM
No no, it's in the right place I think.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on March 13, 2010, 11:40:57 PM
 :victory:
Here's how my weekend started.
I showed up for work. Basically told two coworkers to either go fuck themselves or I'd take a pushbroom to their backsides, told my boss to "give me some goddamn respect" unless he really was a "alcohol-fueled narcissist" and then told them to get me some goddamn tables and fill them with people until the spilt out of the store.  (That last on is more of me paraphrasing. It was long and I don't remember it entirely.)

How my weekend ended:
I now have an extra $120 on top of wages from all of my tables and six regular tables that call ahead to reserve a table with me.
I am still doing bitchwork though. A lot less of it but it's still pretty shitty I have to pick up all the slack.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 14, 2010, 07:28:40 AM
Sometimes a spine can be a handy thing!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on March 14, 2010, 02:45:18 PM
YOU RED TEAM LADIES COULDN'T BREAK A SPINE IF YOU--AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH MY SPINE!! :ohgod:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 20, 2010, 05:14:13 PM
So it turns out "Come in a little early to get orientation and do your paperwork" is secret code for "The morning guy clocked out early and the guy you'll be working with tonight is coming late, so get crackin'." And that was pretty much my training.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 20, 2010, 05:16:46 PM
Also one of the cooks makes suggestive comments to every female employee, sings nasty music at the top of his lungs, and calls the Spanish-speaking dishwasher "Taco". He's like a walking harrassment lawsuit.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on March 20, 2010, 09:01:41 PM
Tonight Lamont (our dishwasher) was bussing tables. One of the girls claimed she had a $20 tip on the tables and she never got it.
So she started going around accusing people of taking the money.  (I was accused by 4 different employees) She eventually found out Lamont had bussed the table, told the boss he took her money, and then confronted Lamont.
He was already not in a good mood. He shouldn't be working this late as he is a week or two away from becoming an ordained minister and needs to be at church early in the morning. So he just wanted her to go away so he can do his job so he can go home  Lamont said "Listen. It looks bad for me. I didn't do it and feel insulted that you are accusing me. But I don't want a weird work environment or anything so here. Take $20."  She took this as a confession and told everyone.
 Lamont talked to Jerry (the boss)  and told him he felt really uncomfortable (the girls were avoiding him and not bringing him dishes anymore) Jerry basically said "Well, you did steal her money. That's not what we do here."  After a bit of an argument Lamont quit, stormed out yelling and cursing.  Mind you we still had a few tables.

Everyone was stupid. The whole thing was handled wrong. Besides,  Employees should never leave their tips on the table if the customers are gone.  Even if you trust all your coworkers, I see customers take tips from other tables and pocket them. And we had a lot of kids and preteens tonight. And they are the biggest tip thieves.
I think one of the customers did it. $20 sitting on the table for half an hour with no one near by is a lot of temptation for a random person.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 21, 2010, 05:09:57 AM
Wow, that's like textbook workplace retarded.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 21, 2010, 07:00:59 AM
Amazingly accurate, as I actually have a hospitality management textbook and yes, it says that's retarded.

 You know, in so many words.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on March 21, 2010, 07:08:07 AM
I'm well aware. But on the bright side, I'm mainly a party host now. So I get $50+ per table not including gratuity. And people are asking for me by (nick)name.

They still call me Sunshine though.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 21, 2010, 08:54:41 PM
So apparently every new guy is, like, intentionally overwhelmed on his first day. Effective separation of wheat from chaff, or total dick move? Hint: kind of both.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 21, 2010, 11:21:42 PM
Also, determination of exactly what you're capable of.  If you're told you have to reach an impossible goal and you accomplish only 60% of it, they now know you can accomplish that much under the most pressing circumstances.

The tricky part is realizing that that means you should keep the employee's workload around 80% of that, not 100%.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 22, 2010, 07:40:05 AM
"How's it goin' back here?" "I've got one load in the machine, and these three racks ready to go. I think I'm getting ahead of the backlog a little." "Nice, very efficient."

Trial by fire t(-_-t)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 26, 2010, 05:36:35 AM
I know I'm not MISTER MBA, and that means I have the dumb, but I just can't see any logic behind the pricing schemes our pricing director and CEO want to implement.

"Hi! We're going to renew your current pricing, only if you're below unattainable threshold [X], then instead of the standard one-year period, it'll end at an arbitrary date that's convenient for us and instead of the standard increase range of roughly 3-5%, you'll instead be hit with an increase of 40%-80%. Oh and we probably won't tell you about this until a week or two before it's gonna happen!".

I mean, perhaps I'm missing the Big Picture, but that doesn't seem like "doing business" so much as it seems like revenge.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 26, 2010, 06:37:04 AM
Hypothetical: You spent six fucking extra years in school to get a goddam MBA.

You work for that company.

Tell me what your mindset is like.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 26, 2010, 06:50:29 AM
"I have an MBA? Jesus stone cold hockey sticks! Why am still I working here?!"

Come to think of it, this does fit with the number of resignations the US operation is seeing (LOTS).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on March 26, 2010, 07:37:02 AM
That's your sign. 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 26, 2010, 07:54:50 AM
Eh, seeing as I DON'T have an MBA and have zero useful qualifications, I'm paid quite well (well, more than I'd get elsewhere for doing the same thing - by a fair margin), and in spite of my Manager being  :MENDOZAAAAA: she isn't actually here every day exercising merciless oversight and driving me crazy, so I have lots of freedom to do dumb shit like... post on the boards.

It's not perfect by any means, but I'm gonna try and ride this horse for as long as I can.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on March 26, 2010, 09:13:13 AM
Also one of the cooks makes suggestive comments to every female employee, sings nasty music at the top of his lungs, and calls the Spanish-speaking dishwasher "Taco". He's like a walking harrassment lawsuit.

Read Anthony Bourdain's "No Reservations". The book, not the show. It'll explain a lot.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 27, 2010, 01:21:55 PM
There was no hot water going to the dishmachine when I got here. Now there's no water at all while the plumbers work. I'm a dozen racks of dishes behind and counting, with nothing I can do about it, which is why I have time to bitch about it here.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Zaratustra on March 30, 2010, 11:28:45 AM
oh hey you want to work on a mmo

sure

but you won't be an official employee you'll be your own company and we contract you for a year deal

deal

and if you leave it'll be a break of contract and we charge you 20 times your salary

what.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on March 30, 2010, 11:40:37 AM
 :itsatrap:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on March 30, 2010, 12:12:36 PM
:itsatrap:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on March 30, 2010, 01:28:25 PM
oh hey you want to work on a mmo

sure

but you won't be an official employee you'll be your own company and we contract you for a year deal

deal

and if you leave it'll be a break of contract and we charge you 20 times your salary

what.

Is it an American company?  'cause that almost certainly won't fly in an American court.  Brazil, who knows.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on March 30, 2010, 01:47:07 PM
That is a trap, sir.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on March 30, 2010, 01:49:06 PM
Is the person offering the job Snidely Whiplash?  Check for the gesture of constantly rubbing hands together and being hunched over.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Zaratustra on March 30, 2010, 02:14:54 PM
the contract automatically ends at 31 December, but still it's not something I'm comfortable with.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on March 30, 2010, 02:35:37 PM
Go with your gut on that one.  It sounds like they're set up to fuck you over.
 :itsatrap:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 30, 2010, 04:46:33 PM
Yeah, you have far more to lose from that agreement than you stand to gain.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on March 30, 2010, 05:12:17 PM
I really would not do this. That said, you should tell them exactly what Mongrel just said, that you seem to have far more to lose here than to gain, but that you'd love to do this if there wasn't some massive terrifying illegitimizing trap door hanging over the project.

Just make clear that this is stopping you from joining a project you'd personally passionately want to do, and that if they can rework the deal you'd love to join up.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 30, 2010, 05:20:58 PM
I really would not do this. That said, you should tell them exactly what Mongrel just said, that you seem to have far more to lose here than to gain, but that you'd love to do this if there wasn't some massive terrifying illegitimizing trap door hanging over the project.

Just make clear that this is stopping you from joining a project you'd personally passionately want to do, and that if they can rework the deal you'd love to join up.

This is a Good Idea, I definitely agree that you should do this.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on March 30, 2010, 05:22:30 PM
 :itsatrap:


Welcome, Zara, to the real life game of A Dragon Eats You.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 30, 2010, 06:31:47 PM
Er, no, I would not even entertain this offer or anything else from these people even if it meant working on, like, Harle Gets Naked Online.

At the very best, these assholes are going to annihilate whatever love you have left for the trade.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on March 31, 2010, 01:37:24 AM
Brentai's sig looks like Zara running away from the offer. (Zara is green like Blanka, right?)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Torgo on March 31, 2010, 02:35:56 AM
Hey, a job bitching thread. :perfect:

I was supposed to be transferred out of my current location to another store by now, but as of yet I don't even have a transfer date.  While I understand why, I can't help but feel I'm being bullshitted.  The complete lack of communication during this whole process, which began as far back as the December, hasn't helped.  It also doesn't helped that I haven't had any significant time off since last August, and haven't had a full day off at all since January.  My mind is close to cracking.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 31, 2010, 02:54:53 AM
That last line + your avatar makes me want to suggest "Time to start cracking skulls!" by way of advice.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on March 31, 2010, 10:26:54 AM
So why are you posting on a board instead of cracking skulls complaining to the people who sort this out?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Torgo on March 31, 2010, 10:57:02 PM
So why are you posting on a board instead of cracking skulls complaining to the people who sort this out?
Indeed.  I broached the matter today.  I was told that I should be done and transferred by two weeks "at the latest".  We'll see if it pans out.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on April 02, 2010, 07:03:24 AM
I have a freaking sweet phone interview next week for auditing in San Diego.

Meanwhile, in Oklahoma, the internal audit manager keeps everyone from being able to work by running around and complaining about the ants in the office (which she attracted last week by feeding them cinnamon roll and saying how adorable they were).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on April 02, 2010, 03:23:58 PM
(which she attracted last week by feeding them cinnamon roll and saying how adorable they were).

what (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/FlatWhat)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on April 05, 2010, 05:41:50 AM
I'm covered in ants :(
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 05, 2010, 07:01:13 AM
...I'll be in my bunk.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 05, 2010, 09:29:59 AM
How terrible. Ants are some of the ballsiest bugs. They don't hesitate to not only crawl all over you (and inside) but they invite thousands of their buddies to do the same.
Fuck ants.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Defenestration on April 05, 2010, 02:45:56 PM
6 months ago, I got a job working at a movie theater... that lasted for 2 days. I quit without a regret after understanding that my boss thought that mopping the spotless floor 8 times a day that the janitorial staff for the hotel casino that the theater was in already mops it at the beginning and end of each day was normal. He had tons of little quirks, such as making sure to clean up any spilled salt used by a customer on their popcorn before the next guy comes over with his popcorn instead of doing it all at once when everyone's done, freaking out if a single ground in speck was in the carpet after I vacuumed up the theater between shows, and weirding out customers by insisting they walk through the little divider maze set out in case there is a line even if they are the ONLY PERSON THERE.

His name was Rod, and he was a total nutjob. So I wasn't really surprised to hear that he went bankrupt a month later. I was also apparently one of 20ish people that he hired for periods varying between 5 hours and 4 days. It's so hard to find good robots these days.

Anyway, a new guy named Gary was setting up to open the theater now, and I was hired by him. He's pretty much the polar opposite of Rod, and a pretty cool guy. As far as shitty customer service jobs go, I could do a lot worse. Everything was going dandy, right up until the day we were actually opening for business. And then a man in a suit came up and gave Gary a huge stack of paper.

Ron apparently is suing him and giving a cease and desist over the fact he's using the renovations he did to the theater. It sounds pretty frivolous due to the fact that he went literally bankrupt and he didn't actually pay off a lot of it so the hotel casino actually owns it... But I'm still not working for a few weeks because the nutjob wanted to pull one last dick move. Nice.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on April 05, 2010, 03:48:19 PM
Rod sounds obsessive compulsive.

Also, what the fuck is the theater going to do, un-renovate?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on April 05, 2010, 04:22:34 PM
If the theatre is owned by the hotel-casino, how far does the hotel-casino have the new boss' back?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Defenestration on April 05, 2010, 06:55:54 PM
They specifically said they were behind Gary all the way, even to paying legal fees. Rod pissed off a lot of people. Apparently he's under a court order where he cannot set foot on the premise of the Hacienda.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 10, 2010, 05:41:24 PM
Worked from 3:30 onward tonight. They left me off at 7:30 when my table left. Not my last table. My only table.  We weren't dead either. In fact, we had a full house there for a while.
The girls just wouldn't let me take a table. And the parties I was going to do were canceled. And Coop wouldn't let me bus tables. He actually threatened me. It's all he does anyway. 
And I wouldn't have even gotten the one table I did if it wasn't a good friend of mine and he said he wouldn't eat there if I didn't serve him.
Tomorrow we have 7 parties and will probably have a full house most of the night. And I am the only actual server. We have a few people who can help but it looks like tomorrow is mostly up to me. And I have to show up at 1:30 and work until midnight.
Let's look at those two days. One day I work for four hours and no one will let me do my job. The next day I work eleven hours and have to take care of the whole restaurant. Fanfuckingtastic
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 10, 2010, 06:39:32 PM
They're still trying to get you to quit, huh.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 10, 2010, 06:46:55 PM
The girls are. They want ALL of the tables all of the money. They made over 90 bucks apiece tonight. I made 7.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on April 11, 2010, 05:16:30 PM
I just don't understand why you haven't quit yet.

If you think you're going to earn anyone's respect by weathering their bullshit, you're front of store staff, not kitchen staff. They're just going to think you're more of a pitiful dork.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 11, 2010, 08:15:42 PM
Eh. Everyone else has cooled off. It's just the girls don't like me. (see the post I made about the nonsexual harassment a month or so back).

Talked to the boss today. I'm going back to working as a cook on the weekdays. I'll cook the food and server. It's great for both of us. I get to work more and practice as a cook and he get's to have less people work for him and save money.
I'm also doing parties now. The magician is getting his workload cut because he can't handle it and he is a pretty shitty server anyway. So that's... $30 per party not including if they leave a tip or order a lot of beer. I get like... 50 cents per beer they order.
So everything is on the up and up. It's just now my biggest problem is the girls being bitches.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Torgo on April 13, 2010, 11:03:43 PM
I admit I don't know how your restaurant does things, but how exactly can they just arbitrarily take your shit?  Servers are supposed to be assigned tables and sections.  If they horn in you tell them to fuck off.  Also, tell your boss/host to do their jobs right.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Dooly on April 14, 2010, 02:32:31 PM
I inquired about the job in this Craigslist ad (http://seattle.craigslist.org/see/ofc/1688985407.html), and got the following in reply:

Quote
Our Company Name is Victorinox,We are a swiss based trade association that deal in the sales and distribution of wrist watches.The primary goal of the  Administrative Officer is to provide local customer assistant to our clients within North America. You will be assisting our clients within North America, the assistance to be provided will include: payment collections and customer service.
Your duties will include:
- Collecting Local Payments
When a buyer in United States decides to purchase an item through an online auction from our sellers he has the following payment options: paypal, Money orders, international wire transfer, international check, or local wire transfer. The quickest option of these is local wire transferring. Local wire transfers are the option that the sales support representative will provide to the clients.

- Managing Data
Along with the payments received from buyers you will be receiving details for these sales. These details will include items sold, price, and buyer's information. You are to file and maintain these purchasing records and transactions.
- Forwarding of the Payments
Once you receive each payment you will be keeping 10% as commission and forwarding the rest to the seller or representative, whose information will be provided prior each transaction. It is crucial to complete forwarding of the payments in a time efficient manner.

- Fees, and Transferring Procedures
All fees are covered by the company. The fees for transferring are simply deducted from the payments received. No client will contact you during initial stage of the trial period. After three weeks of the trial period you will begin to have contact with the buyers via email in regards to collection of the payments. For the first three weeks you will simply receive all of the transferring details, and payments, along with step by step guidance from your supervisor. You will be forwarding the received payments by wire transfer.
Additional Information:
Salary:
During the trial period, you will be paid 2,000USD per month while working on average 3-4hours per day, plus 10% commission from every payment received and forwarded. The salary will be sent in the form of wire transfer directly to your account. After the trial period your base pay salary will go up to 2,200USD per month, plus 10% commission.
Taxes:
You will receive a monthly invoice stating your total income. All applicable taxes are covered by the company.
Your First Primary task (Collection of Payments):
1. Receive payment from our Customers or Clients.
2. Cash Payment at your Bank or any cashing facilities near you.
3. Deduct 10 % which will be your percentage/pay on Payment processed
4. Forward balance after deduction of percentage/pay to any of the offices you will be contacted to send payment to, you'll have a lot of free time doing another job, because this job schedule is flexible, you'll get good income .But this job is very challenging and you should understand it.
Please kindly fill your details below, so that you can get started.
Personal Information
Full Name:
Address:
City:
State/Province:
Postal Code:
Resident Phone Number:
Mobile:
Regards.
Daniel Morgan

Any odd spacing or spelling seen above are as they appeared in the email, but the whole thing was bold in my gmail window.  The from address on the reply is danielmrgn2 at gmail dot com.  This is a scam, right?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on April 14, 2010, 02:36:36 PM
Yes unless you are cool about laundering money
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on April 14, 2010, 02:37:06 PM
while getting your own money stolen
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on April 14, 2010, 02:37:35 PM
ordering a purebred teacup puppy from africa is probably an easier way to do that than applying for this job
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: patito on April 14, 2010, 03:27:00 PM
Victorinox is an actual thing, but I doubt they'd be advertising on craigslist.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on April 14, 2010, 04:28:59 PM
10% of wristwatch sales to a local money-handling stooge found on the Internet? That sounds like "too good to be true" territory.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 14, 2010, 05:43:52 PM
Looks pretty obviously like a scam to me.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on April 14, 2010, 05:46:33 PM
Yeah, the idea that they pay you buy wire transfer is hilarious to me.

Just give them your routing number and bank account, I'm sure this is legit.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on April 14, 2010, 06:20:57 PM
10% of wristwatch sales to a local money-handling stooge found on the Internet? That sounds like "too good to be true" territory.
Looks pretty obviously like a scam to me.

You two need to be more supportive of your friend he's just trying to make an honest living okay guys jeezus
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 14, 2010, 06:57:10 PM
I think your first mistake was applying for Data Entry Clerk.  Any company that's not contracting that kind of menial labor through an agency is probably either not very reliable, or is trying to do something under the table.

If you're okay with that sort of job then go find your nearest temp agency(s) and get on file with them.  It's either free, and they'll do all the negotiating for you, or it's a scam and you can walk out without thinking twice.  You're not guaranteed work tomorrow but it's not as massive a waste of time as trying to find an employer from craigslist that is not a massive flake.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on April 15, 2010, 05:10:59 AM
freesteamjob.tk!  :D :D :D
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 16, 2010, 12:53:20 PM
Mongrel's Law of the Workplace: Your company's overall performance is in inverse proportion to the number of consultants it has retained.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on April 16, 2010, 01:44:35 PM
Work expands to fill the time you give it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 16, 2010, 03:20:32 PM
I'm not sure if that's an explanation, corollary, your own 'law of the workplace', or all three.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Torgo on April 16, 2010, 10:54:38 PM
So I pulled a twelve hour shift at the bakeshop I work at today, 7:30am-7:30pm.  Four hours in I decided to take a break despite the fact that my cohorts, all of whom came in before I did, hadn't.  I asked the guy I work with if he wanted to go first.  He declined, so I went.

Now, there's two girls that work there.  We work in the same space, but what I work on is almost always separate from them.  One of them came in at 3:00am, and as of 11:30 when I took a brake, she hadn't yet.  Now her boyfriend is engaging in some good old-fashioned passive-aggressive shit-talking on Facebook about me going first.

 ::(:

Never-minding the fact that my taking a break has nothing to do with whether she can or not, after eight hours, if you haven't taken one yet, it's your own damn fault.  Also, it's none of his damn business.  He came into help today,* but it's my and her workplace, not his.

*Full disclosure: This is the campus bakeshop for the culinary program I attend.  All of us are students, and Boyfriend, who I also share classes with and have known for some years, came into help today.  Help his girlfriend, that is.  Not that I have anything against that and don't appreciate the extra set of hands, but its not like he was there for academic enlightenment or just to plain 'ol help out.

edit: stupid typos
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 17, 2010, 04:01:59 AM
Then tell him

(http://premodeconhist.files.wordpress.com/2009/02/nun.jpg)
(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_n-hm9gvEHbk/SWgq_AxohCI/AAAAAAAACZA/q3-cY6-3FfA/s400/yor_trio.jpg)
(http://www.biggerpills.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/not_the_bees.jpg)
(http://whackswax.com/whackssmall.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Torgo on April 17, 2010, 10:55:51 AM
Oh I did, believe me, and he replied with some incoherent wall of text about me being a self-centered douche and how I don't get it and I will never be as good as them and I'm not a team player.  Basically trying to cloak himself in a deluded sense of chivalry and taking my statements way too personally.  This all coming from someone who routinely alienates three-quarters of the people he meets because this is what he always does, and loafs about during class bitching about wanting to go home.

I've known this dude for three years and I've tried to think best of him and give him the benefit of the doubt, but I'm done.  I'm pretty sure I'm going to go to my boss with this when I see her on Monday or Tuesday.  Not to be vengeful really, I just don't want to have to deal with his bullshit when I'm there working on the clock and he's just there to hang out with his woman and mostly do nothing.  (He has to keep of a vague pretense of helping or else chef would kick his ass out.  She don't put up with loafers and distractions.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on April 17, 2010, 01:09:46 PM
Tell her boyfriend to get his head out of his ass and stop fucking posturing
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on April 17, 2010, 02:00:17 PM
Then tell him

(http://premodeconhist.files.wordpress.com/2009/02/nun.jpg)
(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_n-hm9gvEHbk/SWgq_AxohCI/AAAAAAAACZA/q3-cY6-3FfA/s400/yor_trio.jpg)
(http://www.biggerpills.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/not_the_bees.jpg)
(http://whackswax.com/whackssmall.jpg)

I spent five minutes thinking 'tits your beesewax?'
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 17, 2010, 08:48:56 PM
So tonight I made $40 on tables. Which is terrible. For 8 hours of work, I should get more. I only had 6 tables tonight. Checked in at the end of the night and I heard the girls bitching to the boss they only made $160 each. They should get more tables. They left and I told my boss what I did for the night and he said "That's not right."
After a while of talking I convinced him not to have the girls work next weekend. I'll do the whole weekend by myself. If I need help, I'll pay whoever comes in to help out of my own pocket. Every table (minus the party tables) will be mine. So next weekend will be hell but I'll finally put those girls in their place. If I can do it (or even come close to handling the whole thing with minor help) then he will cut them back to being only rush hour waitresses and they will only get what I don't want.
I am so looking forward to it.  I've got this shit down. I handled more work at Pizza Hut and back then I'd help cook too.

EDIT: To make things clear, it's not so much the money as the amount of work and their attitude that gets me. I can handle not getting a lot in tips as long as we all did roughly the same and we all did equal work.  They are taking all of the work and leaving me with none.  And then they complain they didn't get more money. I just want my fair share of work.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 17, 2010, 09:01:40 PM
Oh man, if you pull that off... rich, savoury, meaty, JUSTICE.

GOOD LUCK

(http://i11.photobucket.com/albums/a195/SnakeLinkSonic/Snake_Salute.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 18, 2010, 04:28:37 AM
That goes double for me.

(http://images.politicalmasks.com/childrens-navy-costume.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on April 20, 2010, 06:27:32 AM
(http://hphotos-snc3.fbcdn.net/hs420.snc3/25310_798679273267_9600795_43747057_1971175_n.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on April 20, 2010, 07:28:12 AM
I want to note that if anyone here has not worked a desk job before, the above picture is basically a summary of every desk job ever.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on April 20, 2010, 08:02:05 AM
 (http://i630.photobucket.com/albums/uu23/Bon_Bon_2009/scruffy-1.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 20, 2010, 08:06:10 AM
Add some doodles of astronauts getting eaten by dinosaurs and you'd be right.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on April 20, 2010, 08:08:11 AM
Hell, while we're at it, paperclip sculptures and staple caltrops.

And if your work environment allows it, lots of toys.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 20, 2010, 08:08:20 AM
*posts more inane drivel from work computer*
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on April 20, 2010, 08:23:46 AM
Coworker: You know how sometimes you're walking with an umbrella and you get hit by lightning just a little bit?
Me: What.
Coworker: Oh. Well that happens to me a lot, it hurts, but this weekend it hurt even worse because I was holding my cat when it happened!
Me: What.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 20, 2010, 08:33:06 AM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PhAzLlSZFcc
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on April 20, 2010, 08:47:56 AM
If you make your saving throw, you only get hit by lightning a little bit.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on April 20, 2010, 09:07:33 AM
To some people, arc discharge is arc discharge.
I can forgive people for not remembering
(http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y182/diowho/static_shock_6yr1.jpg)
but maybe I shouldn't.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on April 22, 2010, 09:11:02 AM
(http://imgur.com/W5vSe.jpg)


I work in a castle
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 22, 2010, 10:48:04 AM
Please tell me you talk like a scullery maid and curtsy to everyone.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on April 22, 2010, 11:00:25 AM
I would if they ever let me out of the kitchen
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 23, 2010, 12:19:33 PM
Today's the day.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on April 23, 2010, 04:56:26 PM
Godspeed, you man among men, you.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on April 23, 2010, 05:03:51 PM
Today's the day.


I will be playing as many 80s montage musics as I can in your honor, Lottel.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 23, 2010, 09:20:30 PM
Well, tonight was the second busiest night in store history. The boss had grabbed a waitress from the place next door (sister restaurant) to help with rush anyway. I did all of my tables and helped with hers, bussed both of ours, kept everyone fed and liquored up, and made sure everyone was happy. Even running out of sauce and plates, everyone was happy.
I did damn good.
Tomorrow night? I told him I didn't want the other server. It'll be just me. He said after a show like tonight, he wasn't going to ask her back anyway. He knows I've got it tomorrow night.
There is no emoticon smug enough.
 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Torgo on April 23, 2010, 11:47:41 PM
Well, tonight was the second busiest night in store history.

...everyone was happy.

And at the end of the night, that's what matters.  You got this locked. :perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 24, 2010, 06:57:49 AM
There is no :hi5: big or animated enough.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 24, 2010, 11:34:47 AM
DAY TWO: START!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 24, 2010, 12:02:22 PM
FINISH THEM!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 24, 2010, 08:44:52 PM
Only server (Well, a chick came and took a table, but whatever). Everyone was happy.  Made $80 some in credit card tips alone. 
Tomorrow night will be a snap. I bet the boss I can wait the whole dining room and help cook outside of rush. $25 is on the line. He already said the girls' hours are docked.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on April 24, 2010, 09:46:43 PM
 :victory:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 25, 2010, 04:12:35 AM
Only server (Well, a chick came and took a table, but whatever). Everyone was happy.  Made $80 some in credit card tips alone. 
Tomorrow night will be a snap. I bet the boss I can wait the whole dining room and help cook outside of rush. $25 is on the line. He already said the girls' hours are docked.

(http://i303.photobucket.com/albums/nn121/Rnadmo/flawlessvictory.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on April 25, 2010, 11:18:48 AM
Masterfully played, sir.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 25, 2010, 07:45:57 PM
Guess who is an extra 25 bucks richer?
 :glee:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on April 26, 2010, 03:12:01 PM
Is it me?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on April 27, 2010, 07:01:23 AM
Lottel is the god of waiters.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 27, 2010, 07:02:10 AM
He's Hermes.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on April 27, 2010, 10:10:49 AM
hey look the man can't help how he's bor-

oh Hermes! my bad.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on April 27, 2010, 11:02:57 AM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QYQ4uV8NDJo
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on April 27, 2010, 12:26:21 PM
Promoting people is hard! Or at least, I chose a bad way to do it.

I need to select two people to promote to a position that, while it pays no more than their current position, provides more hours per week. I figured there'd be a pretty low response rate, so at the end of training today I just asked who would be willing to work more hours. I had eight people come up to me, all promising they can work 40 hours a week, any time, any day. This is obviously bullshit, but since I don't know anyone's particular schedules, I can't really call anyone out on it.

This puts me in an awkward spot (at least in my head). The two I would consider most qualified based off what I've seen so far are guys, and I feel like giving them both the position may make the women in training assume I chose them based off that, and since everyone seemed to want as many hours as they could get, I don't even have the "well, he was available more" cushion to fall back on.

I have no problem firing people or chastising because if I do, they did something to deserve it. Still, I have trouble telling people "well yeah, you're okay, but from what I've seen this guy is much more okay."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 27, 2010, 12:28:45 PM
Lottel is the god of waiters.

I have this suspicious feeling that there's already a shonen manga about waiters....
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 27, 2010, 12:49:33 PM
Promoting people is hard! Or at least, I chose a bad way to do it.

I need to select two people to promote to a position that, while it pays no more than their current position, provides more hours per week. I figured there'd be a pretty low response rate, so at the end of training today I just asked who would be willing to work more hours. I had eight people come up to me, all promising they can work 40 hours a week, any time, any day. This is obviously bullshit, but since I don't know anyone's particular schedules, I can't really call anyone out on it.

This puts me in an awkward spot (at least in my head). The two I would consider most qualified based off what I've seen so far are guys, and I feel like giving them both the position may make the women in training assume I chose them based off that, and since everyone seemed to want as many hours as they could get, I don't even have the "well, he was available more" cushion to fall back on.

I have no problem firing people or chastising because if I do, they did something to deserve it. Still, I have trouble telling people "well yeah, you're okay, but from what I've seen this guy is much more okay."

Specific examples of why they're "more okay" (that have nothing to do with their personality), give the also-rans something to look at to emulate and help dispel notions of favouritism for dumb reasons like "He has a wang". What you do is give the job to the two who deserve it and if someone is upset, then you use those reasons to quietly explain why to anyone who may bring it up with you.

You may also choose to announce those reasons up front, but that's more of a "management style" call. Some people prefer to be low key about that kind of thing (announcing the promotions, full stop and only giving the whys and wherefores if pressed), some prefer to make a bit of an announcement that "so-and-so got it because their excellent work with whatever" to everyone. It kind of depends on workplace dynamic too.

One thing though: the low-key version only works if you're the kind of boss who is considered approachable. Otherwise, the also-rans will grumble to someone they shouldn't or will just stew.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on April 27, 2010, 01:27:57 PM
The great part that I left out because I'm dumb is that I've basically been reading to these people for two days. That's all I know of them.

The main office requires me pick two before tomorrow's training and I have how they've answered the 1-2 questions I've had time to throw at them to judge with. It would be a little easier if I at least got to see them in the field first.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 27, 2010, 02:14:12 PM
Lottel is the god of waiters.
I made almost $400 in tips alone this weekend, gained a few regulars, and showed I am the best there. Without breaking a sweat or losing a smile. I work Wednesday and Thursday. Girls are getting their turn this weekend. The boss is scared. They don't want to do things alone.  Too much work for the two of them.
I casually reminded the boss that I did it easily by myself. He got an odd smile.
Then I put on sunglasses and rode off into the night.*

Promoting people is hard! Or at least, I chose a bad way to do it.

I need to select two people to promote to a position that, while it pays no more than their current position, provides more hours per week. I figured there'd be a pretty low response rate, so at the end of training today I just asked who would be willing to work more hours. I had eight people come up to me, all promising they can work 40 hours a week, any time, any day. This is obviously bullshit, but since I don't know anyone's particular schedules, I can't really call anyone out on it.

This puts me in an awkward spot (at least in my head). The two I would consider most qualified based off what I've seen so far are guys, and I feel like giving them both the position may make the women in training assume I chose them based off that, and since everyone seemed to want as many hours as they could get, I don't even have the "well, he was available more" cushion to fall back on.

I have no problem firing people or chastising because if I do, they did something to deserve it. Still, I have trouble telling people "well yeah, you're okay, but from what I've seen this guy is much more okay."

What I see wrong here is the fact that the sex of the workers is coming into play for promotions. You chose the two you felt were best for the job. Just because they both happen to be dudes is not fault of your own or theirs. Give them the job. It's wrong to deny them the job because of a hypothetical situation with a hypothetical female.
If something comes up, just tell the complainer you felt the two were best qualified based on the data you had at the time.



*The putting on of sunglasses may or may not have happened. Historians can't agree.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 27, 2010, 03:50:47 PM
The best part is how you made enough in tips alone to not really care if you work this weekend or not. :suave:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on April 27, 2010, 09:48:32 PM
Rygaron, the only suggestion I can give you about promoting is to be SURE that you let everyone know you promoted the 'most qualified'. EVEN IF (more so, actually) you pulled that term completely out of your ass.

You will want to talk to everyone who responded personally and tell them you're sorry they didn't get the responsibility (never say job, if you make it sound like more work, not just different work, or better work, its harder for people to feel passed over) but that should something open up in the future, you'll consider them for it.

Also, you have a cloud of anonymity to hide behind about WHY you promoted someone, should you need to, because (I'm sure you know this but I'm just making sure) you should NEVER be discussing other people's qualifications or lack thereof with another associate.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on April 28, 2010, 08:32:40 AM
Turns out there was another page of responses to Rygaron I missed. So nvm, what everyone else said.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on April 28, 2010, 12:07:28 PM
Rygaron, are you a team leader for the Census? Sounds an awful lot like it.

I just started training with them on Tuesday, so look forward to stories of encounters with crazies in the next few weeks.

I had a few interviews lately with some other jobs that I was pretty sure I was going to get, but no one has called me back as of yet. Pretty frustrating when you get called in for second and third-round interviews and they don't even bother to tell you the outcome. It seems like since employers are currently inundated with applicants because of the crappy job market, they think they can treat them without any semblance of courtesy or decency.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on April 28, 2010, 12:15:21 PM
Rygaron, are you a team leader for the Census? Sounds an awful lot like it.

I just started training with them on Tuesday, so look forward to stories of encounters with crazies in the next few weeks.

I had a few interviews lately with some other jobs that I was pretty sure I was going to get, but no one has called me back as of yet. Pretty frustrating when you get called in for second and third-round interviews and they don't even bother to tell you the outcome. It seems like since employers are currently inundated with applicants because of the crappy job market, they think they can treat them without any semblance of courtesy or decency.

They can and will in most cases. Sucks, but that's how it is.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 28, 2010, 12:18:13 PM
Yeah, that's the way it goes these days. Recession or no.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Defenestration on April 28, 2010, 05:09:58 PM
I also starting training with the Census to be an enumerator on Tuesday. I doubt I'll have many complaints about the job itself, and look forward to the stories I can tell... if every single place I visit isn't a foreclosed home anyway.

While being bored in the training listening to them go over occasionally helpful bits but mostly really really really obvious information kind of sucks, I can think of worse things to be doing for 14 bucks an hour other than sitting on my ass!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on April 28, 2010, 07:48:28 PM
Try being the one reading all that stuff...

the week after spending a week listening to it.

Actually, I haven't had to promote anyone yet either, because no one in a position above me knows what the fuck is going on. Originally the position was going to go to two people, then maybe one, now maybe no one. I haven't been asking about it at all, and I'm hoping if I continue to not I can see people in the field before deciding, which will make it 100 times more of a non-issue deciding.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Defenestration on April 28, 2010, 08:30:42 PM
Yeah, I sort of got the impression that's how it went for my leader-person. There was a question about if we should leave our numbers on the notes if noone's around, but MAYBE they might get a specific phone for the CLA SO they don't call us but no one's sure yet because they're still talking about it and etc. I'm not exactly suprised, since I'm pretty sure there's next to no year round staff at the Census Bureau since they only do this every ten years.

Curiously, apparently she has a CLA already that took the class with her and only has to pick one more. But yea
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on April 29, 2010, 10:33:09 AM
It's not my job, but we don't have a thread for things I do in class so I'm putting it here. It sure doesn't deserve its own thread.

One of our projects in my Computer Apps class is to put together a business proposal for a fictional catering company.

And on each Word document must be a picture watermark of our choosing.

Well, it's a catering company, so delicious food is going to be the theme. My watermark? The Sandvich.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on April 29, 2010, 03:19:23 PM
I am beginning to resent the movie store I work for. Avatar was just released, as many of you probably know. I've been promoting the heck out of presales for the last month because if I don't, I basically don't get to eat. But it turns out that not only is the product itself a total rip-off (just the movie. No special features), it is priced ten dollars more at our store than anywhere else in town -a mark-up that I won't see one penny of.
I had been at least hoping we would drop the price in the system to the usual release day pricing (which is usually okay) when it came out. The price in the system was the release day pricing. Eeeeeeeesh.
This puts me in an awkward spot (at least in my head). The two I would consider most qualified based off what I've seen so far are guys, and I feel like giving them both the position may make the women in training assume I chose them based off that, and since everyone seemed to want as many hours as they could get, I don't even have the "well, he was available more" cushion to fall back on.
Just so you don't feel so bad about this if it's still relevant: Not promoting them because you didn't have them in mind for the position isn't sexist. Promoting them to make the gender split more favourable even though you didn't have them in mind would be.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on April 29, 2010, 05:55:26 PM
Well this is surreal. Everyone I tell this says that this sounds like a news story, so maybe it should be. I'm currently the third-generation in my family training to work for the Census in NC, FL and TN. My mother is training in FL and my 93 year-old grandpa is training in TN.

Also, I found out today my Crew Leader chose me to be one of the two Crew Leader Assistants for my area. I guess that's good for something, even though the pay is the same. I'm thinking maybe that means they'll more likely keep me on longer towards the end of the assignment, since it's looking like it's only going to take about four weeks to finish and they'll probably start cutting people near the end.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Torgo on May 02, 2010, 11:26:32 PM
After months of being in the dark and pestering, I finally have a hard transfer date: June 6th.

Only two or three months later then what they were originally "looking at", but hey!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 03, 2010, 12:40:06 PM
God knows The Stallion is an awesome guy, but man I wish he'd write down our fax number somewhere. No joke, he asks me for it like 3 times a day. EVERY DAY.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Defenestration on May 03, 2010, 03:31:10 PM
I go to meet with my Crew Leader today, only to find Mike, her Crew Leader Assistant. This would be because she was fired for taking overtime after learning for the first time on Friday that she had to make time to see how her crew leaders operated in the field for 2 hours each, so they could watch us perform in the field for 2 hours each before the deadline on Monday.

So we're without a boss, or a person to do payroll, paper work, or even a person to give our completed questionnaires to. This is becoming quite the shitstorm.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: inyandep on May 03, 2010, 04:30:17 PM
I go to meet with my Crew Leader today, only to find Mike, her Crew Leader Assistant. This would be because she was fired for taking overtime after learning for the first time on Friday that she had to make time to see how her crew leaders operated in the field for 2 hours each, so they could watch us perform in the field for 2 hours each before the deadline on Monday.

So we're without a boss, or a person to do payroll, paper work, or even a person to give our completed questionnaires to. This is becoming quite the shitstorm.
Yeah, sounds like it. They definitely didn't teach her right, since we were told at least once a day during training that they'll just pay you and ask you to not come back if you declare overtime on a stub. You have your Field Operations Supervisor's number? Might be a good idea to give a call.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 12, 2010, 07:28:50 AM
There's one customer we have, a Laboratory head at a large hospital in Québec. She's not necessarily a bad customer, but she is, shall we say incredibly high-maintenance*

It never ceases to amaze me when random people all across north america have heard of her, have her phone number memorized, and know EXACTLY who is being talked about when someone they seldom talk to says "your favourite customer".

*(I differentiate the two with the simple question of "Are you afraid to call this person?")
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on May 15, 2010, 11:08:59 PM
Oh. The dEcatur gamers club came intonight. DnD, munchin, catan gamers. Not video.
I jumped over a counter and shit so I could wait on them.
Covinced them to get a super deluxe package with a lot of addons ($380 tab by tge end of the night) and convinced them to get the banquet room on wednesdays. As long as they vbuy at least $50 worth of food they can have it. Of course, I'll be there. I'll work off the clock to help them and when not helping I'll play games and shit.

So yeah. roughty $400 sale instead of about $200 and got them to keep going here once a week. not a bad night for work.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 20, 2010, 09:02:06 PM
So today one of my coworkers decided that the chemical packs that turn into packing foam were a good subject for horseplay.

I will be picking little yellow bits of foam out of my hair for fucking days.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 23, 2010, 09:54:15 PM
Shirt's been soaking in detergent and color-safe bleach for several hours.  Quite a few little dots of hardened packing foam have detached themselves and floated to the surface but there have to be a few hundred still on the thing.

Pretty much going to tell my boss tomorrow that I'm going to expense the fucker.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on May 24, 2010, 09:43:34 AM
This is a long weekend here in Canadaland, and Sundays are always dead anyway, so there were next to no customers last night.

...Up until closing. We had fourteen customers come in in the ten minutes before closing, when everything had already been cleaned and there was only one cash register working. ::(:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on May 24, 2010, 12:28:02 PM
 :perfect:  I am usually the guy who leaves the door open so stuff like that happens at my job.
Sure recleaning sucks, but the the thrill of getting 14 people taken care of in as short of an amount of time is more than worth it. Right?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on May 24, 2010, 01:18:58 PM
(http://i46.photobucket.com/albums/f122/Aceshigh22/Not_Sure_If_Serious.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Defenestration on May 24, 2010, 01:35:52 PM
It's amazing to witness the lengths that people will avoid having to orally answer a ten minute questionnaire. One house I went to, I saw lights on in the second floor, a TV playing Jurassic Park 2 through the semi-frosted window on the door, and when I rang the doorbell a little girl's voice asked "Who is it?"

"Census Bureau!" I replied. Immediately there was a flash of movement while the child was picked up, the television was shut off, and then the lights upstairs blinked off as well a scant second later. I shrug and leave a notice with my phone number on it (that no one ever calls) like if they weren't home. I went back to my car to organize and do a bit of paperwork, and I saw the door open and a man pick up the notice five minutes after I sat down in my car. He looked at me, a look of terror on his face and nearly slammed the door as I got out of my car and waved hi, but opted to just sheepishly complete the interview.

This would be an understandable reaction for a hispanic household. I could really be immigration. But how I am able to induce such horror into the hearts of an all white family with an accent fresh from Alabama, I'm not sure.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on May 24, 2010, 02:03:51 PM
Fresh from Alabama you say? (http://trueslant.com/rickungar/2010/04/01/bachmann-census-conspiracy-theory-may-cost-gop-big-time/)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Defenestration on May 24, 2010, 06:41:01 PM
I think you may be right about that, Ziiro. That's an amazing bit of news. I can't believe there are actual politicians going on about how the Census shares its data with other government entities when it *doesn't.* There was a situation in 1980s where the FBI was turned away when trying to get information for an ongoing investigation or something like that that I'm too lazy to look up.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on May 25, 2010, 02:25:56 PM
So, leaving your resume on Monster and just sort of forgetting that it exists can still get nibbles.

A contractor company just called me today to inquire about my 9 month-old resume on Monster with a job possibility back in Maryland.

Do I really want to move back across the country?

Maybe. :nyoro~n:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on May 25, 2010, 02:29:22 PM
(http://i46.photobucket.com/albums/f122/Aceshigh22/Not_Sure_If_Serious.jpg)

Totally serious.  

And McDohl? Maryland? Really?

It's Maryland.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on May 25, 2010, 03:10:43 PM
Maryland's a pretty good place.  Where in Maryland does matter, though.

But he's in Texas now so even fuckin' St. Mary's or Somerset would be an improvement.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on May 25, 2010, 03:16:05 PM
So, leaving your resume on Monster and just sort of forgetting that it exists can still get nibbles.

A contractor company just called me today to inquire about my 9 month-old resume on Monster with a job possibility back in Maryland.

Do I really want to move back across the country?

Maybe. :nyoro~n:

Are you sure you didn't already post that? I'm getting some serious deja vu here.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Doom on May 25, 2010, 05:13:26 PM
(http://i46.photobucket.com/albums/f122/Aceshigh22/Not_Sure_If_Serious.jpg)

Totally serious.   

And McDohl? Maryland? Really?

It's Maryland.

Maryland rules but thanks for supporting my earlier post in Review Revue.

I am one half of the maintenance team at a small local yacht club. I don't mean actual yachts, I mean that rich old people buy nice house-boats and pretend they are a fleet. They appoint a commodore and have meetings and shit every 3 months. Who cares.

Me and the other dude just do chores and fix stuff all days. We also do pump-outs. What that means is that on the weekend, dudes want fuel in their boats and poop out. So I get paid to chill on a dock holding a hose for 20 minutes at a time. Then I get tipped.

Sometimes they'll do the pumping themselves and then tip me. Damn.

Also rich people are crazy. We take out the trash around the compound and grounds every day and on my first day we found a 15 inch LCD TV-Monitor. It works perfectly fine, just a bit smudgey on the front and you can't tell if you look at it head on. We found it next to the box of the mystery trasher's new LCD TV.

Also, the other guy in the maintenance department is my dad, so I sort of get paid to hang out all day shooting the shit with power-tools and coffee with my pops.

The only dramatic downside and change are the hours: Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday? 7:30 AM to 4 PM everyday. DAMNIT. But... I'm already used to waking up at 5:30 half the week and my eyes are really healthy and white now.

Still man.

5 AM.

Can't stay up past 11 PM at the absolute latest.

Damn.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on May 25, 2010, 05:45:02 PM
Maryland's a pretty good place.  Where in Maryland does matter, though.

But he's in Texas now so even fuckin' St. Mary's or Somerset would be an improvement.

Oh yeah. Forgot he was in Texas.
Go Maryland!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 25, 2010, 06:24:27 PM
I'm sorry, but Maryland does not rule at all if you live in or anywhere near Baltimore.

FUCK YOU, BALTIMORE.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on May 25, 2010, 06:54:40 PM
Yeah, I'd be back in St. Mary's or thereabouts.  I might see about living over in Calvert county, though I'd hate to commute over that damn bridge every day.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on May 26, 2010, 07:44:33 AM
I could really use a new job. See, unlike other teenagers, I'm actually good at my job and not an asshole, so I've just stuck with this one job instead of getting fired or quitting. But right now I need the extra income and could use a better-paying job. I also think it would be much easier to just let a bunch of strangers know I'm trans than to tell people I've been casual acquaintances with for years.
My big problem is, not having had to perfect my job-hunting technique, I have almost completely forgotten how to write a resume and the interview process. I have a place in mind already (a very nice incoming call center). Any tips anyone can give me?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on May 27, 2010, 03:12:48 PM
I have a place in mind already (a very nice incoming call center). Any tips anyone can give me?

Do not pass go.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 27, 2010, 06:16:33 PM
I was going to say something like that, only I realized that I work in a very nice call centre right now.

Of course, my being the only rep in the entire country has something to do with that.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on May 28, 2010, 06:26:18 AM
Seriously. I already work retail, so I know how crappy customer service can be. This pays better, has benefits, has paid time off for whatever I want, and has Rock Band in the break room.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on May 28, 2010, 11:12:51 PM
Alright, with all that's been going on this week, I've slept maybe six hours in the last 3 days, give or take an hour or so.
This morning, I still awake, call my boss at noon. I get the new guy at work.
"Hey. Can I talk to Jerry?"
"You come in at 3."
"I know. Can I talk to Jerry, though?"
"You aren't sick. See you at 3."

I wasn't going to call in sick. I was calling to see if and/or when they needed me.  Turns out, I only had one table tonight. At 7. And I was the only one who could do it. It was over 100 people. (Total headcount at the end of the night, 104 and a half [toddler]) And yes, I did the whole party by myself, thank you for asking. Everyone left happy, full, and liquoured up without having to wait more than 5 minutes between beers/wine glasses/shots. Total at the end of the night was $668. Without the beer. The beer total was $838. I got tips on every person who ordered beer. Plus a nice 20% gratuity...
I paid one of the other guys to clean up after me. Then went out on the town with a good friend.

Tomorrow is a 150 party. And sunday is another 100 party.  This may kill me, but damn, if I pull it off...
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 29, 2010, 04:32:56 AM
Did you tell your boss about the douchebag?

I mean, if you don't want to start trouble, you don't have to. You can just nicely ask your boss to tell douchebag that, yes, it's okay for you to talk to him - cause sometimes it might actually matter.

Not to mention the fact that you're probably worth about ten times more to your boss than douchebag is.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on May 29, 2010, 04:34:06 AM
Yesterday I finally got a shift from the temp agency. They sent me over to an industrial warehouse just down the street, thank goodness. And the job is pretty much just trying to clean as many engine blocks as you can in an hour, and then trying to break that record.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on June 03, 2010, 03:50:42 AM
Need a new job, current one is slowly driving me insane from office politics.

Actually went as far as to apply for a job at Walmart corporate.  Not sure how I feel about that.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on June 03, 2010, 04:27:10 PM
...so something unexpected just happened.

My boss told me he's recommended me for a full-time position.

Not in his department.  Not installing software on computers and then shipping them to people.  Something completely out of the end-user support chain.  Something more suited to my abilities.

I never really expected that.  I figured the best I could hope for from this job was to get full employment but keep doing what I'm doing.  Now it looks like I might actually get a real job out of the deal.

Fingers crossed.  Especially since my girlfriend may be losing her job.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on June 03, 2010, 05:36:04 PM
Spectacular, Thad!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on June 03, 2010, 09:27:35 PM
Congrats! What will you be doing? Popping into a forum once a month?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on June 03, 2010, 10:04:28 PM
I'll save my congratulations for when you get the job, if that's OK.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on June 04, 2010, 04:48:21 AM
I hope your girlfriend doesn't lose her job, but that sounds great, Thad!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on June 04, 2010, 06:36:33 AM
Congrats! What will you be doing?

Don't know yet, but it's the department with the guys who work on the imaging server and who recently ended a test program for thin clients.

Popping into a forum once a month?

Actually, I'd probably spend some time working from home, meaning I could hit the forums on my breaks.  (They're blocked at work.)

I'll save my congratulations for when you get the job, if that's OK.

Not a bad call.  I'm cautiously optimistic but have learned not to take things for granted.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 08, 2010, 10:56:24 AM
Today, we had a visit from one of the service managers passing though the office on his way to spend time with some of the field engineers. He was a friendly fellow and it was nice to meet him.

This visit came with a sort of a bonus experience. For the first time in my life I have seen with my own two eyes that truly frightening creature: The totally unconvincing toupee. I mean, wow. I though beasts this obvious became extinct in the mid-eighties.

At first, one might deride such a man for his choice of coiffure, but upon reflection one realizes the special unique combination of utter terror and balls-out courage it takes to wear those things and one stands corrected, impressed, and humbled.

(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b369/Redd81/Top%2030/Snake_Salute.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on June 09, 2010, 08:49:26 PM
Got offered a paid internship this week at an economic policy research think tank as a Junior Analyst. Neato.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on June 10, 2010, 03:25:47 PM
Well shit.
Alright. A few weeks ago, my boss made us switch over to a system where the customers pay me and I hold on to all of the money, much like I did as a driver. The difference is that this is inconvenient for the customer AND me. Moreso for me, but still inconvenient for the customer as the have to pay me directly instead of going to the front counter and paying. Inconvenient, but tolerable.
Well NOW his two business partners (the guy who bought the building and the restaurant owner next door) gave him some... "advice" to improve the store. Now we are switching a lot of things around. In a bad way. For one, we are no longer organizing the tickets in the kitchen the same. See, we have this rack where we put tickets that are made, but in the oven. Then we take the tickets and deliver the food when it is ready. We are reorganizing them from Table Number to Time In. Which is bad but sounds good. See, Time In is never a problem. The only problems we have with time are when the cooks mess up on the food and they have to remake it. Having Time In isn't going to change that. And the reason it was Table Number in the first place is because if I am taking a table or something someone else can go out and take the pizza as well as other similar situations. The Table Number was there so OTHER people knew what food went were, instead of just me.  Now I am the only person who knows what food of mine goes where. Which is a problem if I spend 70% of my time on the floor, doing my job.
And we have a magician. He got paid differently than everyone else and we've changed it. Now he gets 20% of the tips of the tables he goes to. Which is understandable because tables he go to have a better time and should tip more. So they want me to give him 20% of my tips at the end of the night. But I know the magician. And I know the business. He's not going to go to every table. So I'll end up paying him more than I should. Especially if people tip him directly (which is what they usually do and will continue to do so). So this means I'm going to have to keep track of how much the table paid. How much they are tipping, whether or not they saw the magician, and whether or not they tipped him directly. Then take 20% of the tips on the tables applicable and give it to him at the end of the night. Then argue with him as to why it's not more than that.
We are also becoming a bit more... full service. Now I will go get drinks and all of that instead of just alcohol and food. This is a good idea and one I've been doing on my own for a while now.  So I think it's great. But it's another change in a sea of changes.

AND ANOTHER THING: The two partners (who my boss speaks highly of me to) came in and told me how to do my job better without actually seeing me work. THIS IS SOMETHING I CAN'T STAND. I do a good job. I am the best at it. I am the head server for a reason. They were saying things that are obvious and everyone should know. And things that I actually do better than what they are saying. My boss would step in "Sunshine actually does this and it works better for him and the customers appreciate that." The partners would look at me confused. And then say "Yeah. I guess. Do what he does." So tl;dr for this section? LOTTEL IS RIGHT AND PARTNERS ARE STUPID FOREVER.

tl;dr overall: Bunch of ill thought out changes will make Lottel's job less fun until the system crashes and a lot of customers (And Lottel) get trampled over in the process.


EDIT: And yes, I will bring up these things with the boss tomorrow when I work next.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on June 11, 2010, 11:05:07 PM
UPDATE: So we did the thing tonight.
I am making between 25-30% of my tips for doing a lot more work. The boss checked everything out and isn't happy with that. Who KNOWS what will end up tomorrow/
Tonight, I added everything up. I made $71 in tips, not the best, but pretty good. I left the store with $43.
Yeah.


Yeah.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 11, 2010, 11:48:42 PM
Clearly you are going to have to battle the magici-

The House of The Dead Magician's Theme (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kRM51sYbYaw#)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on June 12, 2010, 01:29:35 AM
Well shit.
Alright. A few weeks ago, my boss made us switch over to a system where the customers pay me and I hold on to all of the money, much like I did as a driver. The difference is that this is inconvenient for the customer AND me. Moreso for me, but still inconvenient for the customer as the have to pay me directly instead of going to the front counter and paying. Inconvenient, but tolerable.
Well NOW his two business partners (the guy who bought the building and the restaurant owner next door) gave him some... "advice" to improve the store. Now we are switching a lot of things around. In a bad way. For one, we are no longer organizing the tickets in the kitchen the same. See, we have this rack where we put tickets that are made, but in the oven. Then we take the tickets and deliver the food when it is ready. We are reorganizing them from Table Number to Time In. Which is bad but sounds good. See, Time In is never a problem. The only problems we have with time are when the cooks mess up on the food and they have to remake it. Having Time In isn't going to change that. And the reason it was Table Number in the first place is because if I am taking a table or something someone else can go out and take the pizza as well as other similar situations. The Table Number was there so OTHER people knew what food went were, instead of just me.  Now I am the only person who knows what food of mine goes where. Which is a problem if I spend 70% of my time on the floor, doing my job.
And we have a magician. He got paid differently than everyone else and we've changed it. Now he gets 20% of the tips of the tables he goes to. Which is understandable because tables he go to have a better time and should tip more. So they want me to give him 20% of my tips at the end of the night. But I know the magician. And I know the business. He's not going to go to every table. So I'll end up paying him more than I should. Especially if people tip him directly (which is what they usually do and will continue to do so). So this means I'm going to have to keep track of how much the table paid. How much they are tipping, whether or not they saw the magician, and whether or not they tipped him directly. Then take 20% of the tips on the tables applicable and give it to him at the end of the night. Then argue with him as to why it's not more than that.
We are also becoming a bit more... full service. Now I will go get drinks and all of that instead of just alcohol and food. This is a good idea and one I've been doing on my own for a while now.  So I think it's great. But it's another change in a sea of changes.

AND ANOTHER THING: The two partners (who my boss speaks highly of me to) came in and told me how to do my job better without actually seeing me work. THIS IS SOMETHING I CAN'T STAND. I do a good job. I am the best at it. I am the head server for a reason. They were saying things that are obvious and everyone should know. And things that I actually do better than what they are saying. My boss would step in "Sunshine actually does this and it works better for him and the customers appreciate that." The partners would look at me confused. And then say "Yeah. I guess. Do what he does." So tl;dr for this section? LOTTEL IS RIGHT AND PARTNERS ARE STUPID FOREVER.

tl;dr overall: Bunch of ill thought out changes will make Lottel's job less fun until the system crashes and a lot of customers (And Lottel) get trampled over in the process.


EDIT: And yes, I will bring up these things with the boss tomorrow when I work next.

I'm sorry, but the magician getting a cut of your tips is complete horseshit. If he wants to make a livable wage, he should go back to doing birthday parties. If he can't get work that way, he's obviously a shitty magician - which brings up why he's not making a livable wage, as he'd be making enough in tips on his own merits if he was any good.

I hate the idea of shared tips - I had a friend who worked at a pizza place where he was forced to split his tips with insiders. He quit after a month, because he was making barely minimum wage while the inside store staff were making over 10 dollars an hour after tip shares.

Moral of the story: You're doing all the work and the magician can go fuck himself.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on June 12, 2010, 02:19:31 AM
Well, it's not the magicians idea. He used to get tips separately. And he made a lot more money. This is the partners coming in, seeing all of this, and saying "How can we fuck this up?"  He's making less money, I'm making less money, and the store is exactly the same.
I talked to my boss and I have to deal with it tomorrow with whatever he came up with. But he said that if by the end of the day tomorrow, he'll do one of two things: Tell the partners that he's going to lose half the staff with these changes (which is actually a possibility. This is a lot more paperwork and stuff I have to do with a lot less money in my pocket) and that he's going back and they'll have to deal with it or pay the difference. Or he'll sit down with me and I'll come up with a solution for the store.

The magician can be kind of a dick, but he's not the bad guy here. And nor is my boss really. He's just trying to make everyone happy and it's kind of doing the opposite. Tonight we crunched the numbers and he SAW IN NUMBERS how shitty this system is. So he wasn't that happy either.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Fredward on June 13, 2010, 10:48:11 AM
I (http://www.alphadna.com/) spend (http://www.amysystems.com/) a (http://www.anagenesis-inc.com/) lot (http://www.andromed.com/) of (http://www.alsclinic.com/index_1024.htm) time (http://www.belpro.ca/index.htm) looking (http://www.depro.ca/DeproEng/frameset.html) at (http://www.focusintra.com/anglais/vision-of-the-future.htm) terrible (http://www.gmatnet.com/INgmat.htm) terrible (http://www.immucon.com/) web (http://www.microniks.com/)sites (http://www.octostop.com/).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 13, 2010, 11:04:12 AM
That is some high-end 1997 shit right there.

what on earth do you have to do with those things? Tell me the answer is "blow them up and rebuild them from the ground up".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Fredward on June 13, 2010, 11:10:49 AM
I wish. I'm putting together a mailing list of a ton of Quebec companies for the school, because they want to beg for moneys. It just so happens, a lot of these companies don't spend a whole lot on web design. My favourite is this one (http://www.andromed.com/) which is less ugly and more terrifying (just, read the words in the flash animation).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 13, 2010, 11:13:13 AM
Yeah, saw that. It's kinda :mikey:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Dooly on June 13, 2010, 05:25:10 PM
What the hell is the point of that Andromed site?  As far as I can tell, there are two pages, the front page with only cryptic information about what product or service they sell, and a contact page that doesn't even have an email address.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 15, 2010, 07:37:18 PM
So my boss put in his two weeks' notice today.  This is a bit more significant than it usually would be because, well, the team I'm on is basically just myself and my boss.  We were running way under required resources as-is - without getting too specific we were basically determined to need 4 people at present, and the scope of the work is constantly and rapidly expanding - and in two weeks all of that is basically going to be all me, in addition to all of the administrative and maintenance tasks that my boss had previously been responsible for.  It's going to be like that for a while until we're approved to hire again, because I'm really the only person in the testing department with the required background to do this stuff.

I'm not sure how to react to this.  Worst case scenario, I got stuck permanently in the same position doing things (or rather, continuing to do things) way out of scope of the job that I'm being paid for until I either quit or die of exhaustion.  Best case scenario, I stick it out for a while, get to hire and train my own personal lackey, and convince the higher-ups that if I'm going to be an administrator, a lead, and a four-man workforce, that my current status of second-from-bottom-paygrade contract worker isn't really appropriate.

Oh and, in all seriousness, if anybody's out of a job and has good software/avionic/testing experience and doesn't mind moving to OC California and taking a bunch of shit from me, let me know.  I've got something for you.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 15, 2010, 07:39:16 PM
A: What are the consequences to the company if you quit (i.e. removing the last remaining structural support for your department)? and
B: Is the next level of management bosses sharp enough to understand those consequences (at least in vague terms)?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 15, 2010, 07:40:57 PM
A: What are the consequences to the company if you quit (i.e. removing the last remaining structural support for your department)? and
B: Is the next level of management bosses sharp enough to understand those consequences (at least in vague terms)?

A. The entirety of its infrastructure software goes completely untested.
B. No.  Or rather, they don't at this juncture, but are probably sharp enough to if I can figure out how to play these cards.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on June 15, 2010, 07:54:17 PM
...Hay, Brentai.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 15, 2010, 08:02:40 PM
That was actually kinda targeted at you and Max, yeah.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on June 15, 2010, 08:05:54 PM
If your higher-ups wish to get in contact with me on Monday through Thursday, please don't try until after 1:30 PM central, which is when I get out of class.  Friday, Saturday, and Sunday are pretty much open season.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 15, 2010, 08:19:27 PM
The best part is I get to pretend it's Data saying all that.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on June 15, 2010, 08:24:54 PM
but i used a contraction

UNLESS I'M REALLY LORE!!!
:omg:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on June 16, 2010, 09:58:13 AM
Thanks for the offer Brent.  Ironic you ask me in IM the day before my annual review, which I honestly have no clue how it is going to go down.  I've been criticized heavily for my work over the last year and I've never been told I've improved.  I honestly think there's a chance I could get the axe today.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on June 16, 2010, 05:28:25 PM
Not axed.  Very neutral result.  Not that anyone cares.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 16, 2010, 05:35:30 PM
Hey hold on there.

:hi5: for surviving. Because it's deserved.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on June 16, 2010, 05:38:04 PM
I used to work at the worst of places for positive reenforcement. When I quit the boss was surprised, she implied that I was great at my job, and I was like, "When in three years have you told me I did good at my job?" Her answer was that if she wasn't complaining, then I was doing a good job. And I was like, "Bitch."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on June 16, 2010, 06:59:51 PM
Yeah, I think that's a Walmart thing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 16, 2010, 07:14:23 PM
A lot of places are like that.

Honestly the place I work at is so enthusiastically complimentary that it's just awkward.  It gets to the point where people just sort of bubble over if you can as much as accomplish the most basic function of your position.

...actually it's not really that surprising when you think about it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on June 16, 2010, 07:37:43 PM
stop that i don't actually want to move to california.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 17, 2010, 07:36:55 PM
I have been shown who is the boss!

Well, really, they're giving me another lead instead of having me be the team, which is good.  I don't really have the sort of administration/management/dealing with other people's crap skills that my old lead did, so even though the new lead doesn't actually know any PHP or webdev stuff (yet), she does have all the skills needed to take on the job the old lead did: deflecting all the corporate overhead bullshit so that I can do actually do all the real work.  Plus it's somebody I know and respect, so it's at least better than the possibility of being jammed unceremoniously under some douchebag.

We're still hiring a third, though, and the nice thing is the requirements are likely to be much more relaxed now (though the job posting that's being tailored for the position doesn't make it seem so).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on June 17, 2010, 07:49:07 PM
So my boss put in his two weeks' notice today.  This is a bit more significant than it usually would be because, well, the team I'm on is basically just myself and my boss.

[...]

Worst case scenario, I got stuck permanently in the same position doing things (or rather, continuing to do things) way out of scope of the job that I'm being paid for until I either quit or die of exhaustion.

Ugh.  Been down that road.

The year I spent unemployed afterward was preferable.

Oh and, in all seriousness, if anybody's out of a job and has good software/avionic/testing experience and doesn't mind moving to OC California and taking a bunch of shit from me, let me know.  I've got something for you.

Gotta stay where I am for the moment; maybe next time.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on June 19, 2010, 11:53:09 PM
So I tested something at work today. I've been saying that this new business plan was actually worse for servers AND business since we switched, Tonight, I risked money to see if I was right. Tonight I took less tables than I usually do, less than half actually. I spent more time on them and treated them and waited on them like I did before all the changes, so they got their own drinks and all that and I said my old spiel.
I walked out with $120 in tips. I had 8 tables. Last night, I had 17 tables and made a little over $80.  Same basic demographics of people coming in. Each table averaged around $40 for the bill.
A customer even said they liked the old way better. So I asked the girls to see if they were experiencing something similar. They were.
Talked to the boss after we closed. He was a little... inebriated. So I'll talk to him tomorrow again.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 24, 2010, 11:19:10 AM
Big "what the fuck is even going on here" meeting moved to Tuesday.

It is looking more and more like I'm about to be straight dicked without any recompense.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 24, 2010, 11:24:24 AM
What happened? No new boss after all? Boss, but no new bodies? Everyone gets fired?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 24, 2010, 11:30:13 AM
Boss who would need more training than a new person hired with the correct background, basically.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Defenestration on June 25, 2010, 11:24:52 AM
I got picked to go in the second wave of the Census which is titled the Nonresponse Follow Up Vacancy and Delete Check.

I don't actually get to start working until next week, but I guess I was silly to assume that the training today would have been important. The entire 4 hour deal was re-iterating procedure that I followed for the 4 weeks I was working, and amending or correcting the employee manual/handbook. I wonder idly if it would have been cheaper to simply reprint and distribute a new manual than pay ~60 people in every urban area of America 14 dollars an hour to cross out and add things in pen.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on June 25, 2010, 12:42:49 PM
Found out today that my work was directly responsible for someone being fired (they were also told they needed mental help but I was only indirectly responsible for uncovering that)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Defenestration on June 25, 2010, 12:54:21 PM
Well, did they deserve it? No reason to feel bad about an embezzler or something like that.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on June 25, 2010, 12:59:51 PM
Well they hadn't been coming to work for several months and let an enormous national competition go unplanned/booked/etc... until we figured it out 3 days before people started arriving :nyoro~n:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 25, 2010, 01:10:00 PM
Wait... they hadn't been coming to work for several months and nobody noticed until their department was fiscally audited?

:wat:

I'm assuming this person was answerable to someone other than God.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on June 25, 2010, 01:11:38 PM
Administrative oversight.  Her job was under two departments, neither of which bothered to look for her.

Also, our audits are operational and not always fiscal.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 25, 2010, 06:10:37 PM
So basically you feel bad about doing your job perfectly.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on June 25, 2010, 08:12:52 PM
No I feel awesome about finally being able to say "yes" when someone asks if I've gotten anybody fired
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on June 27, 2010, 12:07:03 AM
Not to take away your victory, but I am still unclear as to why it's your fault.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on July 01, 2010, 07:25:51 PM
So yeah, I did end up getting dicked raw.  Really badly in fact.

I guess I should just be happy I don't work in the public sector. (http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5gBqNO6Pkz2nduqexciT09DcZkfzgD9GMKL100)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: James Edward Smith on July 03, 2010, 05:38:00 PM
My new job as a Game Developer at a company called Bitheads has required me to move to Canada's reportedly somewhat dull but at least lovely and green capital, Ottawa.

I am currently looking for an appartment in the city in which to live until such time as I can save up enough to perhaps buy perminant lodgings. Today I drove down there to look at a number of propects. Upon returning home I sent the following email to my contact with the first appartment I was scheduled to view today.

Quote
Mohnish,

I drove six hours into Ottawa today and 6 hours back to see your appartment and thankfully some other ones as well. I say thankfully some other appartments because while I found the other viewings helpful an informative, I found the one I received at your building today thoroughly unprofessional and pointless.

I thought that we had arranged for me to see a 1 bedroom apparent that was availiable immediately today at 1pm, but upon arriving at your building and phoning the number provided in your posting, I got a hold of an apparently confused and rude old man who greeted me with the phrase "I don't know what you're talking about!" before even so much as an introduction before and then he hung up on me. Insensed, I approached the front office of your building, believing the person who answered to be in there since I could hear the phone ringing from in there when I tried my phone call.

"I don't know what the hell you're talking about!" was his reply again, this time in person, after I introduced myself and said that I had made an appointment for a viewing of 1 bedroom appartment on the ground floor. He then seemingly begrudgingly showed me an other 1 bedroom on the 3rd floor that was thoroughly dirty and in the middle of being repaired. He told me that this appartment was not availiable until August 1st after which point I thanked him for nothing and left since I need to move in before the 19th of July.

If I had not had other appartments to view that day, I would have complete wasted 12 hours of my time and somewhere around 50-60 dollars on gas for nothing. I find this entire ordeal to have been completely unprofessional and it leads me to believe I would not want to be tennent in one of your buildings anyway.

-James Edward Smith
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 04, 2010, 02:12:45 PM
I made twice as many pizzas today as I did yesterday.




So two.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on July 04, 2010, 02:21:39 PM
No I feel awesome about finally being able to say "yes" when someone asks if I've gotten anybody fired

To date I've gotten two people that I can think of fired. One of them was an x-bra Douchebag with a drug problem.

The other was an unwed single pregnant woman.

 :whoops:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lady Duke on July 04, 2010, 05:16:46 PM
I've gotten 3 people fired at work because they were incompetent, and it takes a lot of effort to be that shitty at working at a full service gas station.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on July 04, 2010, 08:57:20 PM
The pregnant woman was basically making everyone's lives miserable. She spent 3/4s of her shift text messaging and chattybitching with the other new girl (who is about to get fired herself) and fucked up tons of Pizzas. when enough mistakes get made, the store's GM flips her shit and yells at everyone. Getting her fired felt awesome.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lady Duke on July 04, 2010, 10:26:45 PM
I love getting douches fired.  It's almost like a really mean pasttime except the part where it comes completely deserved for them and you don't have to deal with jackassery at work.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on July 06, 2010, 06:53:57 AM
Know what I hate? The incessant "nice act" that I have to put on for work. Now, I'm not an angry person. At all. I'm not talking about being friendly to normal customers, because that's what I would do anyway. What I'm talking about is the idea that the key to being a good salesperson is being needlessly positive in situations where that is not beneficial at all. My experiences with this last night can be distinctly summarized in two points:

1) We're currently all being trained in that Kevin Graff retail junk at the moment, and most of it is completely useless to a store that only sells unnecessary impulse items like we do. The biggest thing that ticks me off about it is that we can apparently never say anything negative about our products, which is total garbage advice. I've only had somebody thank me for a movie recommendation once or twice, but I've had loads and of people who thanked me for not spending six bucks on something that was terrible. Customers appreciate honesty more than they do positivity. Last night I talked somebody out of buying Brüno by warning them that it was so bad that several customers asked for their money back after renting it, and though everyone walked away satisfied, I'd probably get chewed out if the district manager were in.

2) Last night somebody called to complain that they weren't paying the fees from the games they returned late. They claimed that their aunt had dropped them off on Friday and that they must have been sitting, not checked in, in the dropbox for four days. Now, since everyone seems to be convinced that when they drop their movies off they enter some kind of labyrinthine catacombs beneath the Earth, I'll just point out that the drop slot just leads to a small box. It takes all of two seconds to stick your head in and see what's in it, and we check it five times a day. There is no possible way for your films to sit there, unnoticed, for an entire weekend. His games were on the cart of checkins, right in front of me. There's security camera footage that clearly shows him returning his games less than an hour beforehand, and as soon as I check them in there will be a computer record showing what time his stuff was checked in. Both he and I know that he's lying, and I have a mountain of evidence against him, yet I am required to be nice and not just call him out on his bullshit like any reasonable human being would, so instead me and the manager on duty sit there and listen to him be an argumentative dick over the phone for an hour while nothing gets done and decent customers get ignored.


Fortunately the manager on duty last night hates this kind of asshole even more than I do. He now has a fifteen dollar charge and four pages of warnings on his account.
:whoops:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 06, 2010, 09:16:35 AM
While the Acts of Gord are pretty old hat and certainly not novel when the whole Internet is a vent for shitty jobs, I did like his approach to deadbeats. "I'm not paying that!" "Then your account has been forwarded to collections. Goodbye." "Wait wha*click*
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on July 06, 2010, 11:34:31 AM
My current job can be frustrating sometimes, so I've been looking around at other jobs, applying some places. I got a call back from Stream (http://www.stream.com/) for their local call center.

I had a good phone interview, and I had an in-person interview lined up for today.

But then I did some research.

They had a TB outbreak in 2007, and the office itself sounds incredibly unhygienic. (http://www.beavertonvalleytimes.com/news/story.php?story_id=117616371757211500) Based on this and the fact I re-weighed my current job with the risks/bonuses of a new job, and I cancelled my interview.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 06, 2010, 12:40:26 PM
Oh yeah, I've been gradually convincing my coworkers to use better safety and sanitation practices since I arrived at my job. I hope it makes good resume padding. AFAIK I'm the only person in the kitchen who's ServSafe certified, and that's not an ideal situation.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on July 06, 2010, 07:46:19 PM
There is a small stuffed dog at work that serves as a mascot of sorts. It has a small tear in one side that one of my managers has been using to gradually fill it with hand sanitizer while nobody is looking. After it dries, it smells like rubbing alcohol if you squeeze it.

That is pretty much the hygiene situation at my store.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on July 06, 2010, 07:55:06 PM
On the subject of getting people fired, I once got a girl I worked with fired because she pissed in some guy's drink because the last time he was in he didn't tip "high enough".

I think she did this less out of FURIOUS ANGER and more because she thought it was THE PINNACLE OF HILARITY.

She was certainly furious when I hauled her off and told the manager what she did right in front of her, though. She even made threats of physical violence and told me "she knew where I lived".

I think like two months later I got TPed but I was living in college town so who the fuck knows
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 06, 2010, 08:08:18 PM
Because when you're dragged up to your manager and accused of something terrible, threats make everything better!

Also, teg: you win.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on July 06, 2010, 08:29:32 PM
Er, the threats came later in private.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on July 06, 2010, 08:31:45 PM
Did you remind her of the time you leaped from a second story balcony and beat up six guys or whatever crazy shit?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 07, 2010, 11:34:47 AM
Not my job, but: I just left my knives with a professional sharpener. His actual name is Jeff Edges.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on July 10, 2010, 06:42:15 PM
This one old lady flipped out when I asked to see her driver's license and basically accused the company of being part of an identity theft consipracy.

I know, I know. Retail stories are pretty boring because 99% of them are about apathetic employees meeting stupid customers, but this was pretty much the fastest and most abrupt switch from "fairly nice" to "nightmarish" I've ever seen. I didn't even bother arguing since I couldn't get a word in edgewise, so when she threatened to take her business elsewhere I just said "okay", locked up her movies again, and called up the next customer.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on July 10, 2010, 06:45:34 PM
Why'd you need to see her driver's liscense? If it was in regards to a credit card transaction, that's a violation of the merchant's agreement with the credit card company.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on July 10, 2010, 07:49:40 PM
...so when she threatened to take her business elsewhere...

Always amazed by how many people seem to think this is a valid threat.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on July 10, 2010, 07:58:30 PM
After a while you actually start to listen for it, because it's 100% of the time the end of the argument.

"I'm going to go..."

"Please do."

"I... you... er... fine!"  And you never hear from them again, because the only people who ever write to corporate are the ones who are too dickless to complain to you in person*.


* Not topical.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on July 10, 2010, 08:44:45 PM
Why'd you need to see her driver's liscense? If it was in regards to a credit card transaction, that's a violation of the merchant's agreement with the credit card company.

We need a government-issued picture ID* in order to start an account, and we need either a card or ID. You can buy all you want without an account, but we need proof of identity if you want to rent anything.
I know a lot of people absolutely hate this, but it's really not that unreasonable. The store I work at is really small, and we still have about 20,000 accounts and get hundreds of people each day. There's simply no better alternative. The information recorded from your ID is no more than what you could find in a phone book.

Basically what I'm getting at is that being a customer doesn't mean you don't have rules to follow when you enter a store.


*read: driver's license. It's the absolute bare minimum. Some locations need way more proof of ID.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Crouton on July 10, 2010, 08:54:55 PM
Always amazed by how many people seem to think this is a valid threat.

I'm more amazed at how many retailers take it/pretend to take it as one, so the assholes get away with it and the cycle begins anew. The basic sentiment I get on this from managers is that even if a customer is costing them money, they want to keep them anyway because they MIGHT have friends, and MIGHT tell them to shop there too, and their friends MIGHT not also rip them off.

*read: driver's license. It's the absolute bare minimum. Some locations need way more proof of ID.

I've seen people throw bitchfits over having to show a driver's license in order to rent and drive a truck.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on July 11, 2010, 12:25:47 PM
teg: Do you work at a Blockbuster or something?

'cause I used to, many moons ago.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: EvaKisu on July 11, 2010, 02:36:10 PM
So I use to be a school bus driver. So dealing with students and parents = no fun in life. Because, as everyone knows, every child is an angel and every parent knows how to deal with their child. Okay,  So that was almost so thats dealing with 146 students each route every day, and I did a morning and night route. YAY.  So after two years of that I move and working in the oil field as a chase driver I go from 146 kids to 5 big male babies. No so bad, just annoying as hell. Then, back to school bus driving when the oil field when that dried up.  :tldr:

Now, this is were it gets fun. By the whims of fate I got a really awesome job. :perfect: I get to do graphic work and work with my hands. Not to mention, I'm being molded to take over my department in the  store and the only person I have to work with actually hates me and does all she can to make my life hell. YAY.  ::(:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 13, 2010, 11:57:20 AM
Oh boy, another exciting day of "Will I get fired for trying to balance the needs of two departments with an intense hatred of each other, for whom I'm the go-between and fulcrum?"

Actually forget just today, I'll probably spend days in mindless terror, waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 13, 2010, 12:27:45 PM
This whole "work for minumum wage at around thirty hours a week until you get promoted" thing isn't going very well. I have about $15 to last me until next week, and have several hundred dollars in expenses that will need to be met very soon.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on July 13, 2010, 12:31:39 PM
Oh boy, another exciting day of "Will I get fired for trying to balance the needs of two departments with an intense hatred of each other, for whom I'm the go-between and fulcrum?"

Actually forget just today, I'll probably spend days in mindless terror, waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Come, friend! Make the most of an uncertain future. Enjoy yourself today. Tomorrow... may never come at all.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on July 13, 2010, 02:01:26 PM
Also, I have a job interview tomorrow for a dishwashing position at an Italian restaurant.

I remain cautiously optimistic.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 13, 2010, 02:34:14 PM
Buge will soon learn to hate mozzerella cheese and Balsamic vinegar as I do, and for the same reasons.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on July 13, 2010, 04:32:27 PM
Oh that's right, I forgot

I'm the only person within twenty miles that doesn't eat eggs or cheese

jesus god what do I do
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on July 13, 2010, 04:45:44 PM
Rooting for you dude, good luck.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 13, 2010, 05:57:37 PM
Don't lick the dishes clean
:advice:
Use the dishmachine.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lady Duke on July 13, 2010, 07:24:59 PM
This whole "work for minumum wage at around thirty hours a week until you get promoted" thing isn't going very well. I have about $15 to last me until next week, and have several hundred dollars in expenses that will need to be met very soon.

Yeah, I worked at fucking gas station land FOR A FAMILY MEMBER for a year and I never got a raise at all.  I feel your pain :|
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 13, 2010, 08:20:48 PM
I still believe the promotion is forthcoming, or I'd be working somewhere else. I just can't make ends meet in the meantime. Maybe I can use the open labs at school to bake bread, and sell that again... I wonder if that's flagrantly illegal or merely a gray area?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on July 13, 2010, 08:30:21 PM
Wait, does lady duke work at crazy jobs that regularly give people raises more than once a year? Where can I get on that shit? Ever?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 13, 2010, 08:37:25 PM
Shit. You guys get raises? I get a raise one month before minimum wage goes up. So they can say "Here is you raise!"

Oh well. I'm possibly getting a raise soon. After only 7 months of being employed. And making buku (bookoo? Boukou?) bucks for tips.
Yeah. I love this job. Best job I've ever had and will probably remain that way for most of my life.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on July 13, 2010, 08:40:02 PM
Beaucoup.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 13, 2010, 08:55:56 PM
The only place that ever promised annual reviews/raises and followed through was Turner, the place where I was already overpaid. Go figure.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 14, 2010, 05:48:06 AM
Friend of mine is paying me to hang out and give tips on being me at my job.  I mean they want everything from how I stand and where to my jokes to all my little secrets to make the person feel special.
Now I'm torn. I'm flattered and all but getting paid? I don't like taking money from friends but they insist. Maybe if I tell them they can pay me in tacos or something
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on July 14, 2010, 10:15:41 AM
Was able to make an effective business case to my boss on why I should have my first aid instructor's certification.  I may soon be qualified to teach first aid!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on July 14, 2010, 08:06:43 PM
See everywhere I go people are complaining about not getting deserved and even promised raises.  It makes me feel uncomfortable about sharing the fact that I got told today they were just waiting for an approval on giving me a 15% increase before they said anything and now it's a done deal and retroactive to the beginning of the month.

I mean I just can't post a ton of Homer Simpson gifs in response to it when every single other person I know is nearly broke.

I am very sure that you all know where I'm coming from and are extremely sympathetic to my pain and misery.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on July 14, 2010, 08:42:02 PM
I feel for you, Brentai. It's not easy having MAD BANK.

I'm considering jettisoning my Help Desk career for a position monitoring network outages on the other side of the building. Bonus round: it would be 3rd shift, overnight, but I'd then have my days free for grad school.... assuming I get in.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on July 14, 2010, 09:08:42 PM
Shit. You guys get raises? I get a raise one month before minimum wage goes up. So they can say "Here is you raise!"

I'm still a temp after a year and a half.

It is the longest I have ever worked in a single job.

(I'm not saying I got passed over for getting hired on.  I'm just saying I still don't know if it's happening or not.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on July 14, 2010, 10:44:14 PM
Jesus, Thad, what do you do, again? I've never heard of someone temping for more than six months, let alone a year and a half. Standard temp is seasonal, temp to hire is 90 days. What's the deal?

I assume you're temping through an agency, have you talked to them about this?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on July 14, 2010, 11:06:36 PM
Technically I'm permatemp too with no plans for change.

Basically it's the company saying "Fuck you, buy your own damn health insurance."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 15, 2010, 03:08:13 AM
Haven't you heard Shinra? Permatemp is the new gainful employment. Has been for at least a decade.

Best way for a corporation to roll back the clock to the days they didn't have to give their employees a damn thing, really.

I myself was a temp for well over two years at my previous job, as was Koipond. He was hired by another department... as a temp again. I got the boot without a dime of severance. Of course, it's not as bad in Canada, since LAWL HEALTH INSURANCE, but companies here resort to permatemps for largely the same unscrupulous reasons as they do down south.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on July 16, 2010, 04:44:18 PM
Looks like I'm going to have to start programming in Java again.

The money hat loses a little bit of its luster.  Just a little bit though.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on July 17, 2010, 11:42:18 AM
If the census were personified as The Cutest Puppy Ever Who Is Also A Holocaust Survivor I would punch it in the face forever.

Every day they complain that we need to go back out on completed cases and get "better" information. Then they complain that we're spending too much time in the field.

Every case someone turns in we (I have another Crew Leader working with me. She's basically beyond checked out at this point but knows what a completed EQ should look like so she's still good for that) go over, make sure it provides the information needed, from a good source, and has notes explaining every detail. Even the obviously basic ones. Inevitably despite all this we will get these back and be told to get better info. If we got a household member who refused but gave the basic info we need, hey get a proxy to give you the rest. If we get the best proxy available to give everything they know, hey, why are you going to a proxy? Get a resident's info!

All other bullshit aside, just EQ reassignments finally took me past a boiling point today. Generally with every group of kickbacks we get at least half we just added a post-it note saying (in kinder words) "look at the notes you fucking retards". After that they don't come back again. They found a way around it though! If it's an especially special (that's twice the special) case, we send the cases in with INFO-COMMs. That's just a fancy word for "piece of notepaper that has a bunch of shit you don't need". We got about 20 cases back today, that's high for our district, despite the fact that we send in about 200 every day. At least five of those cases I know definitively had INFO-COMMs explaining the exact situation. They came back with nothing but post-its asking why we would handle a case like that and why  there were no notes.

The real kicker is that the guy in charge right now spent about half our training for this operation explaining how we're "the best-of-the-best from NRFU". Really? Then take our word that the work is good or get your own ass out in the field.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on July 17, 2010, 02:30:05 PM
I have blisters on my right hand from training where I didn't think blisters would be possible.  Intense training more intense through use of sporatic lightning storms everytime I fuck up, where fuck up is a slight flinch and not something people would consider major.  No this is not a metaphor, the weather was just that wacky. 

I have a reverse tan from my hat and sunglasses because the two options that day happened to be intense hailstorms with lightning and intense 40-degree sun. 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 17, 2010, 04:36:11 PM
I have blisters on my right hand from training where I didn't think blisters would be possible.  Intense training more intense through use of sporatic lightning storms everytime I fuck up, where fuck up is a slight flinch and not something people would consider major.  No this is not a metaphor, the weather was just that wacky.

I don't understand this at all. Were you wired to some kind of training space gun that fired REAL LIGHTNING FROM THE CLOUDS when you moved a muscle or what? Did they make you wear lightning rods on your hands?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on July 17, 2010, 08:32:32 PM
My coworker actually complained to our boss yesterday because we refused to do a favor for him even though he demanded it and then knocked a bunch of boxes on the floor.

I'm not kidding.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on July 17, 2010, 08:57:55 PM
I have blisters on my right hand from training where I didn't think blisters would be possible.  Intense training more intense through use of sporatic lightning storms everytime I fuck up, where fuck up is a slight flinch and not something people would consider major.  No this is not a metaphor, the weather was just that wacky.

I don't understand this at all. Were you wired to some kind of training space gun that fired REAL LIGHTNING FROM THE CLOUDS when you moved a muscle or what? Did they make you wear lightning rods on your hands?

You'd think that was the case because THAT WAS WHEN THE LIGHTNING AND RAIN CAME DOWN.

Alas, it seems to be the norm with the weather up here.  Despite the bated initial description, it was all shooting and shooting drills with regular ol pistols where somehow lightning still came down when I messed up and got out of the 3-inch group which was the ideal zone.  It was pretty surreal.   
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 18, 2010, 01:44:39 AM
So new chick started last weekend. She was great. Nice, hard working, and actually stayed until she was scheduled to leave.  She replaced the lazy, bitchy chick who hardly ever worked. Well she's off the next two weeks.  And so is the only other waitress. The one guy who occasionally helps me is has the next THREE weeks off then he has one weekend, then he's gone for good. And the magician is finally learning how to serve. He moves in two weeks.

So for the next two weeks, I am the only server except "Mom" who can't wait too many tables before she gets tired. I told the boss he needs to hire some more waitresses and he's interviewing them now. Unfortunately his tastes go with good looking or something.
Honestly, I should just tell him to let me talk to them. I'm the one who has to deal with her. I'm the one who has to do the work she slacks off on. Bleh.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 20, 2010, 01:14:39 PM
Alright. So I /am/ now somewhat in charge of bringing in new waiting staff. I say somewhat as in I can get whoever I want for the job but the boss is looking at a few random people to maybe hire too. One is a drop out who /might/ have been a stripper. The other misspelled her name on the application. So we'll see.


In non-bitching related news, we already sell the 42 inch pizza. That's pretty popular and all that good stuff. But now? Six foot by four foot pizza. Biggest commercially available pizza or something like that. Thing is fucking huge. We still have to figure out a party package with it, but it alone is $550 I think
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on July 20, 2010, 01:27:24 PM
that just seems stupidly expensive. its what, the area of 24 large pizzas, yes, but 550 dollars for 24 pizzas is a terrible markup.

NOT EVEN 24 larges, man!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on July 20, 2010, 01:38:43 PM
A 6'x4' pizza is 3,456 square inches of pizza.  That volume Ledo's one-topping large pizzas to cover that is gonna be about $210, and probably a lot better since it's Ledo's and also not a gimmick pizza.  So yeah that is a pretty silly markup.  Even at ordinary takeout pizza dimensions, who pays $24 for a 14" pizza?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on July 20, 2010, 02:06:49 PM
Let us know when someone is drunk enough to purchase the thing, will you? 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on July 20, 2010, 02:17:31 PM
Let us know when someone is high enough to purchase the thing, will you? 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on July 20, 2010, 03:52:07 PM
I suspect that, like furniture, most of the cost is in storage and transport.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 20, 2010, 04:05:10 PM
I asked my boss. That IS the package price. So 6x4 foot pizza, soda for everyone, room rental, magic show, gratuity, and all that.
That is a bit more reasonable.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 21, 2010, 08:28:52 AM
You know...

When I do ridiculous things that break all kinds of rules, any one of which is probably an immediate shitcanning offense, I never get in trouble (like say, posting that very sentence).

When I try to scrupulously obey the rules and do everything by the book, I get yelled at for hours by everybody over the most minor possible thing, even when I don't even do anything wrong.

I think it's possible that God has my sense of humour.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on July 22, 2010, 09:45:42 AM
There is a new girl at work.

She's cute, she likes video games, and she's actually competent.

:cake:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 23, 2010, 09:01:51 AM
Survived Mid-Term review. (http://brontoforum.us/Themes/default/images/post/good.gif)

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on July 24, 2010, 06:20:48 PM
I hate customers with inflated senses of entitlement. There's this lady who's in literally every night at closing that none of us can stand because of her attitude. She never brings her card or ID; she frequently brings in a dog (which we're not supposed to allow); she'll continue to casually browse in the middle of closing; and she has no reservations about picking up a half-dozen movies and only renting one even though we don't have much time to work with.
Last night she finally crossed the line. While I was serving another customer; instead of waiting in line she came behind, flipped through the movies on the cart (which weren't checked in or locked yet), and walked off to continue browsing.
In the most polite and appropriate manner that I could; I basically told her that even if you're a regular customer, you're still just a customer.



Also, sometimes people are dumb enough to throw their cigarette butts into the outdoor dropbox, which is why we have a fire extinguisher installed in it. Today I found an entire book of matches that had been lit all at once and thrown in.
People will do anything to get out of paying their late fees. :whoops:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on July 25, 2010, 04:46:40 AM
...it's shit like that that makes me glad that my Blockbuster years are behind me.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 25, 2010, 11:40:09 AM
So that chick that I didn't get hired because of the magician being a horndog? I got her to work today. Because we have two parties at the same time and we are supposed to have a full house other than that so I need help. EVeryone else called in today.

I'm looking forward to it. Sort of. If shit goes wrong (like it will) it'll be my fault.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 25, 2010, 09:58:37 PM
Ugh. Tonight was a disaster. The boss sent my friend home. And to top it off, well, there was an article in the Springfield paper and.. well...

Quote from: 'The State Journal-Register'
Jerry Neumann, former owner of Springfield’s Pizza Machine, wants his old customers to try his Decatur restaurant, Clockwork Pizzeria.

“If they come over and we know them by sight, we’ll pay for their gas,” said Neumann, 27.

So yeah. We've been handing out money if they can prove they live in Springfield. Most of them give us some of the money back, and say they'll be back because it's so much better than the old place. Well, so much better than the old place after Jerry left, that is.


Still. To have to pay people for gas to drive an hour to eat here? Takes a chunk out of the register, I'll tell you that.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on July 26, 2010, 11:02:34 AM
It's 12 PM, Monday, and I've already surpassed my Bullshit Limit for the week.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 28, 2010, 06:04:48 AM
It's terribly silly but at work we have an item listed in the system as "BALLS, VIAL". Every time I see it, I can't help but think "They certainly are."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 28, 2010, 06:38:17 AM
There's a small chance I'll be working in a full-service fine-dining restaurant this fall. Maybe.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 28, 2010, 11:36:09 AM
Well! I just woke up to our new server giving me a call.
Apparently the two owners got into an argument and everyone quit. Well, my side quit. The guys who work and I like. And when someone came in for a pizza they asked if we were open and the reply was "Yeah. But not for much longer."

So fuck. I may not have a job anymore? Or I'll work for douchey money guy? Maybe I can get a job at firewater or something.
Shit.This sucks.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on July 28, 2010, 11:41:11 AM
What the hell? Was this completely out of the blue or has there been tension between the owners before?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on July 28, 2010, 11:43:00 AM
Something like this happened at my mom's restaurant. The other employees were getting worried and told people they were closing. The next two days she was on double shifts and had almost literally no customers.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 28, 2010, 11:45:42 AM
They've been boating all week together!

BOATING. You can boat with someone you dislike! Try it. It's impossible.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 30, 2010, 06:49:39 AM
So fuck. I may not have a job anymore?

I...uh... I guess I have a job? I'm heading into work today. The server who called me worked yesterday so maybe it all blew over?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 31, 2010, 11:04:48 PM
I went to work at 4. At the exact time, a group of four teens came in. I got their drinks and came up to the table. All four of the drinks were on a tray.  One of the girls flipped out at whatever they were talking about. Her elbow hit the tray and all four of them went down the front of me. I still have pepsi in my underwear. Fine. Whatever. So I got them more drinks. I got three of them down and was handing the other girl her drink when HER elbow hit the glass and that one went right down the front of me.

10 minutes later, I got them all refills and ANOTHER ELBOW hit the tray. the three of those? Right down the front of me.


And then they barely tipped me. $1.

AND  I STILL HAVE PEPSI IN MY UNDERWEAR.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 01, 2010, 12:38:27 AM
Oh, I thought the padding was part of the costume.

...

That's a lot of Pepsi.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: patito on August 01, 2010, 03:59:57 AM
Well, maybe if you'd stop spilling their drinks they would have tipped you more.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on August 01, 2010, 07:43:39 PM
I got promoted at work! I am now Front End manager. I am basically in charge of everything that's NOT the kitchen. And I'm in charge of everyone but other managers. That's kind of neat! I don't get a raise, per se, yet. But I do get $10 in free food a night. That includes my 25% discount. And my boss will buy my drinks when we hang out (which happens once a week or so.)

It's pretty nice. I mean, not a whole lot will change. it just means I'll have the authority to be doing things I've been doing anyway and now they'll stick. Before I'd do something and someone else would come by and undo it or I'd ask someone to do something and they'd not do it. Now I have the authority to say "I'm doing this. Don't mess with it." and they'll listen. It also means that I am now in a manager in the eyes of the computer. So that simplifies a lot of things for me.

It seems like just yesterday I thought I lost my job,

Oh. Wait.  :nyoro~n:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on August 01, 2010, 08:56:46 PM
You DID lose your job.

...and got shuffled upward!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 05, 2010, 06:24:13 AM
"Ho ho!" boomed the erstwhile CEO, "It seems that one of my departments is up to some devilish shenanigans! Well, whatever shall I do about this?"

Briefly stricken, the CEO's consternation proved short-lived indeed, as he was struck by another brilliant idea. He knew it was a brilliant idea because that was the only kind of idea he ever had. "I've got it! I'll set another department on the first, pitting them against one another as one pits a Musketeer against a Cardinal's Guard! This will keep them both in check and my magnificent organization will triumph once again."

With an almost beatific satisfaction, he crossed off another line on his notepad and licked the tip of his pen. Some might say this was not necessary with a modern ballpoint pen, but he knew better than that.

The CEO wondered what it felt like to have a bad idea; he would have to try and have one deliberately sometime. Though not of course at work. That would just be silly.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on August 06, 2010, 12:20:34 PM
Alright. I've been sick all week. Not-able-to-get-out-of-bed sick. Vomit-if-I-move-to-fast sick. But today I was finally feeling good and woke up relatively early for me. I sat around and had a small, leisurely breakfast and remembered I worked lunch on Fridays. So I got ready and walked in. Waved to a few people, and clocked in. A few guys came in and I walked up to greet them and all that came out was "Gasp gasp squeek sigh." I cleared my throat and tried again. Words came out, but I sounded like a soft spoken asthmatic grandfather. 

I guess a week of sore throat and not speaking means I'm having a difficult time talking today. I sat two tables and they sent me home. And we have plenty of people tonight so I'm on call. Lucky. First time in... months? We've have had too many people scheduled.

I'd celebrate, but I can barely say "Yaaaaaay"
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 08, 2010, 06:24:41 PM
Manager told me on Tuesday I'd start training on the line. Schedule's posted and...  I'm in the dishpit. He's trying to work out Ronnie's schedule in the kitchen before he moves me up. 




No one at this company is named Ronnie.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 08, 2010, 06:45:23 PM
Double-check that factoid (you'll look pretty silly if it turns out Ronnie is somebody's nickname, or a new guy got hired) and call him on it?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 08, 2010, 08:01:09 PM
I'm assuming Ronnie is the new hire he's getting to take the position he promised me. Because that's what happened the other three times.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 11, 2010, 12:40:34 PM
So they finally busted me for a particularly egregious fireable offense (I put through some orders on expired pricing, as the request of a Sales Rep, in case anyone is wondering).

We're gonna find out precisely how irreplaceable I am! If I was down in the states, I'd be out the door tonight. They outright refused to tell me if I was fired or not.

It's not all bad. If they fire me, I won't have to put up with my perpetually angry manager* and I got a coupon for a free 15 minute massage.


*I have some kind of curse that has dogged me at every company I've worked for for the past seven years: nearly everybody I deal with at the company loves me and my work (and no, I don't always go about as a company policy scofflaw), customers love me, everybody's happy.

EXCEPT, for my direct manager, for whom I can literally do no right.

And the manager has always been an angry middle-aged woman, and usually a single, red-headed cougar to boot (God, don't ask me WHY).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 11, 2010, 09:11:22 PM
Meanwhile, my middle-aged battleaxe of a manager told me on Monday she's pushing the paperwork to get me out of permatemp hell.  Yay!  Somehow I always get on the best side of my middle-aged battleaxe managers, which is a pretty useful side to be on.

Ever since then I've been tossed from one awkward situation where I literally had no information about what the hell was going on but everyone expected an answer from me to another, but that's not really related.  It's just the universe telling me that I can't take it easy :giantdeformedheadthing:.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 12, 2010, 02:52:25 AM
Yeah, I'm pretty sure my current manager has some form of Asperger's or something similar. She's well known throughout the company for RAAAAGE and random blindly insensitive comments (like at one office party, she turned to an obese employee without warning and pretty much said "geez you are really fat, you know that?" in my case she once said I was a "totally uncreative person" because I ordered gray file folders. That actually made me laugh my ass off.).

In the meeting about it last night I told them straight up that I didn't say anything about it because she's always mad at me, even for the smallest dumbest things.

Of course sympathy from other quarters doesn't really help me in my current predicament, but it's nice to know that if I'm out on my ass tomorrow I'll have glowing recommendations from the entire Canadian sales force, including the national sales manager (The Stallion).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 13, 2010, 04:50:58 AM
Hmmmm. I thought for sure I was getting fired, but now I'm not so sure.

They're going to a lot of effort to change bits and pieces of my file access permissions when they would just cancel it all in one stroke if I was being canned. I'm going to continue to assume they're just shuffling the deck chairs on someone else's Titanic (covering their ass during interim deliberations?), but we shall see.

The funniest part is that all the file access they've revoked so far was stuff I never used and didn't even know I had. :whoops:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 13, 2010, 08:56:34 AM
I'm due for a promotion next Tuesday again.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on August 15, 2010, 07:19:01 AM
I've been waffling for something like the last year and I pretty much need to stop doing so.  Should I just put in my damn two weeks notice now or make sure I secure something else first?  I've got three or four months (at least) of money in the bank to live on, and I am basically miserable at the moment with my job.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on August 15, 2010, 07:22:30 AM
Do not quit your job until you have a replacement job.  That's just sense, even when the economy isn't terrible.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on August 15, 2010, 08:32:36 AM
I'm going to advise you to do the same thing, if for no other reason to make your indecision worse. You fucker.

If you must be unemployed, have at least 6 months saved and be ready with your unemployment benefits paperwork.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 15, 2010, 09:22:51 AM
Oddly enough your sense of urgency tends to go away when you're not working, even though it's more relevant.

Human nature dictates that if you have four months of cash to live on, and you quit, you're not going to start looking for a job for four months.

Especially you, Procrastimaster.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 15, 2010, 10:04:48 AM
Hey, I got "promoted"! It's one extra shift a week, doing prep work, at a practical pay -cut-.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: clutch on August 16, 2010, 01:49:04 PM
Do not quit your job until you have a replacement job.  That's just sense, even when the economy isn't terrible.

Not only that, but job interviews are much easier for the applicant when his desperation isn't leaking through his pores like some fetid ooze. Send out your resume and suffer in silence at your current job until you find something new.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on August 16, 2010, 03:10:29 PM
It's also similar to how you are more attractive to women when you are taken than when you are single: Even if your current girljob is crazy and awful, it proves that you have qualities that someone desires.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on August 16, 2010, 03:42:47 PM
Yeah, I'm over my fit of panic/rage.  Look forward to it returning next week when the district manager is in town!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on August 16, 2010, 05:27:19 PM
A lady wanted "Happy Birthday, Douchebag" written on a cake. I didn't even bat an eye.

You know you've been working in a bakery too long when...
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on August 16, 2010, 05:30:11 PM
... when you don't stop to ask the story there?  Because it sounds like there's a great story there.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on August 16, 2010, 09:25:57 PM
So, I have, on previous occasion, mentioned my laid-back boss and his uptight counterpart who runs the midwestern branch and who tried to dock my pay for leaving early on Christmas fucking Eve.  I referred to them by the pseudonyms Jim and Dwight; I will continue that here.

So okay.  Apparently a few weeks back Dwight's inventory turned up short a couple of laptops.  Not brand new ones, more like two-year-old ones; the sort of thing we can still send out to people who don't want to budget a new laptop, but, in practice, I have like 15 of the suckers just collecting dust because nobody wants them.

Dwight runs a tight ship.  He is a very by-the-book guy.  He is also a ladder-climbing kiss-ass.  So instead of going to his immediate superiors, he tries to get in good with HR by calling them and asking what THEY recommend.

Well, what they recommend is they hop on a plane and interrogate everyone on his staff the very next day.

The upshot of this is that now inventory is under much tighter control, and we can't so much as take a used keyboard home with us anymore.  And we have to count everything, every day.  Like, down to every single fucking stick of RAM.

And by "we", well, you can see where I'm going with this.  So yeah, my morning inventory that used to take 10 minutes now takes about 45.  I am, of course, expected to fit just as much work into the rest of the day as I did before.  Oh and also we're down to one working barcode scanner, which as you might expect creates a bottleneck in terms of scanning equipment into and out of stock.

Oh, and those two laptops showed back up.  While I suppose it's possible that somebody took them home and then brought them back once it turned into the Spanish Inquisition, I think it's a lot likelier that they were just sitting in a fucking corner somewhere.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 17, 2010, 08:35:22 AM
More goddamned HR meetings without answers, where I just repeat what I've already said again.

Man, just tell me if I'm fired or not already. It's nice and sunny out.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on August 17, 2010, 09:38:03 AM
The new girl is moving. Why do all the cool people leave almost immediately but the most insufferable people stick around forever?


Sometimes I get to do cool stuff when I'm working. Like make ads for upcoming movies and sales that are far more interesting and effective than the ones we're actually supposed to be using.

(http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y89/CX-Neo/rockandride1.png)


I don't get extra pay or anything, and I still have to serve customers while I do it, and I get in trouble if it's not finished on time even though it's not mandatory, but uhh...
uh...
I guess there isn't really much of an upside when I put it that way.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 17, 2010, 10:06:46 AM
That is uh... really fuckin' NICE
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on August 17, 2010, 10:54:18 AM
Until some douchebag comes up and runs his finger right down the middle.


God damn douchebags.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 17, 2010, 10:59:23 AM
LOTTEL! GET YOUR FINGER OFF THAT WHITEBOARD!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 17, 2010, 11:13:08 AM
Hah, sometimes people are too dumb to even save themselves.

So the fellow who asked me to do all this outside-the-bounds stuff in the first place, he's a pretty good guy. I mean, the whole reason breaking the rules even came up between us is because our arcane regulations mean we essentially wind up blackmailing hospitals when agreements run out - sometimes as a surprise they don't find out about until they try to order a desperately needed product.

When all the shit came to light, I just told him, look, just play dumb about the fact that the request was against the rules. I deliberately and intentionally told the guy he could throw me under the bus if he needed to save his job, because he's a got a family and a fair career, whereas I'm at the bottom of the totem pole, am unlikely to go anywhere, and couldn't give much of a damn about entertaining my rage-filled manager much longer in any case.

So he did play dumb. Only he played WAY TOO DUMB. He told them he didn't even know about the situation at all. Which in theory would make sense to say if he was really going to deny everything to throw it all on me... only they already know he asked.

Without going into details about our system, suffice it to say that it's basically impossible that I would even look at doing this stuff without bringing it up with him - it's a given that I did, even if they're assuming I'm a lying sack of shit. So now he looks like a lying idiot when he could have just passed it off as 'misunderstanding'. Meanwhile it makes little difference to my situation.

Well, can't say I didn't try!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on August 17, 2010, 11:51:15 AM
Until some douchebag comes up and runs his finger right down the middle.


God damn douchebags.
When I made one of these for Watchmen, it was up for less than five minutes before someone walked in and wiped their arm across the entire thing.

That's why this one is hanging from the ceiling. :whoops:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 17, 2010, 01:08:36 PM
I worked my "promotion", coming in at nine after four hours of sleep. I got off at one. My regular shift starts at six. I actually stretched out in one of the booths for a half-hour nap. Job interview Friday, but I'm not very enthusiastic about that possibility either.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on August 17, 2010, 02:30:58 PM
The way things are going for you Mongrel, Queen's Park seems like a better place of employment for you. 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 20, 2010, 08:47:15 AM
Question. How much time do you guys spend spoon-feeding people things at work?

For example. Problem comes up and data is requested. I send a comprehensive spreadsheet that contains all the needed information, as well as additional stuff. It's not like it's horribly larded up with kruft or to dense to read, just a simple one-sheet spreadsheet with maybe 5, 7, 10 columns.

Let's say someone wants a list of all our accounts with shipping times with three days or more. I send my complete account list, with shipping times, plus some other info. This way everybody has the same reference document and can use it in future if they need information (Now that's a futile hope because they're all going to delete it or lose the email anyway if they need it even a week from now, but hey, I try). So all they need to do is sort by the 'shipping times' column. But no, I get the inevitable request minutes later for 'Great! can you send us a list of all the accounts with shipping time over 3 days?'. This kind of thing happens pretty much constantly.

I mean, hey, it's not the 'extra work' (haha) that bugs me. If it would take them two seconds to sort something, look it up, hit "ctrl + F" or whatever else is needed to get the information they need, it takes me less time to do the work and reattach a file to a new email (FYI: these are people who know how to use excel, word, etc. better than I do. Familiarity with the software is not the problem here.).

Nor does it really bug me that all my attempts to make sure everybody has good reference material are pretty much wasted. I get asked for the same simple information so many times, you'd think they didn't even KNOW what pen or a notepad are.

No, the real problem is that - even though it's endemic and I should damn well be used to it - I just can't take this level of crippling stupidity any more.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on August 20, 2010, 09:55:28 AM
My last corporate job, I was a project coordinator for a major telecom company. Most of my business dealings were with salesmen who were trying to land their commission and weren't really worried about much of anything else. This is how things would usually go;

It's the 27th. All orders need to be in by the 25th to classify as EOM for the salesman's commission.
Order gets assigned to me. I move it to the back burner pile, because I already have four orders I need to key within the next few days.
Email from salesman: "Hey, do you have order numbers yet?" (literally recieved this order twenty minutes ago)
Email from me: "Can't get you order numbers, recieved after EOM cutoff. I've only had the order for 20 minutes."
Email from his boss, 2 hours later: "What's this I hear about you not being able to get order numbers for captain asshole?"
Email from me: "I recieved the order after EOM cutoff, and I've only had the order on my desk for... 2 and a half hours now. Even if I could get order numbers today, he sent me an incomplete order form (this happened 99% of the time - I had to track down the customer and get this information myself) and I'd be waiting on response from the customer to even begin keying this."
Email from his boss' boss, at the end of my workday, CC'd to my boss, my boss' boss, and the site manager: "Look, we sent the order in before the 30th, if you want to screw around with us and our customer, we can always take our business to another VoiP provider."

My face:  :rage:

Another example:

Recieve order, 2nd of the month. Do my basic pre-scrub, send emails out to sales staff and customer requesting information.
Salesperson: "Please direct all communication to me on this order"
Me: "Acc. to FCC regulations and company policy I have to communicate with the customer on all steps of this order process if we don't have this form signed" *attach form to response*
Salesperson: "I've already sent that form"
*check my order, there's another form they've sent with a similair name that isn't even applicable to this order*
Me: "No, you sent this form, when I need a different form." *attach the right form again*
The next day...
Salesperson, CC'd to my boss and his boss: "Here's the form, I don't appreciate being jerked around like this. Will I have order numbers by EOM?"
Me: "Certainly, it's only the 3rd, you should have them by the end of week if everything goes according to plan. If you could please get the following information from the customer..."
*follows is a five page long tech interview, that he should have performed before even submitting the order to me, that details things about where we're installing the voip, whether they want analog or digital, how many lines they need, how many numbers they need, etc*
One week later:
Me: "Hey salesperson, I sent you this sheet last week, I really need this information before I can get you order numbers"
Three days later:
Me: *Calling salesperson, not getting through*
Me, in email: "Hey, salesperson, I still need this sheet filled out before I can key this order! If I don't recieve this, I'm going to have to put the order on hold!"
Three days later:
Me: "I've had to put this order on hold due to lack of communication, please contact the customer as soon as possible to get this information for me."
A couple of weeks later, three days after the EOM cutoff, around the 28th:
Salesperson: "Hey! do you have order numbers for me yet? The customer wants to know when his service is getting hooked up!"

Me:  :whoops:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 20, 2010, 10:04:12 AM
Yeah, that DEFINITELY sounds like sales staff.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on August 20, 2010, 11:38:02 AM
Mongrel:  I've had to deal with that when it came to inventories and supply shortages at a gig I did for about a year.  I color-coded excel spreadsheets, and I believe I also made the color-backgrounds automatic to a value inserted in the column.  Legends also helped to show with minimal time and effort to the widest audience what needed work on now, and what could wait x weeks. 

People respond well to multiple stimuli, such as text, title and colour. 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on August 20, 2010, 11:50:36 AM
work stuff

Holy hell. Change around some terminology and this is my job and my daily frustrations.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 20, 2010, 07:46:25 PM
Mongrel:  I've had to deal with that when it came to inventories and supply shortages at a gig I did for about a year.  I color-coded excel spreadsheets, and I believe I also made the color-backgrounds automatic to a value inserted in the column.  Legends also helped to show with minimal time and effort to the widest audience what needed work on now, and what could wait x weeks. 

People respond well to multiple stimuli, such as text, title and colour. 

I already use coloured columns or rows. OH WELL.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on August 20, 2010, 08:34:56 PM
My last job was a God Damn Joke. Pizza Delivery is orders of magnitude easier to handle. I had an interview at a local place before landing my current job, where I said the reason I wanted to work at a pizza place was to have a less stressful job. The manager actually asked me: "What makes you think Pizza Delivery isn't going to be stressful?"

I gave him kind of an 'are you fucking kidding me?' look. I just got done with a 'gets paid 12 dollars an hour 40 hours a week to do a 30-40 dollar an hour 60 hour a week' job and a manager who employs people who haven't fully exited puberty yet thinks that pizza delivery is going to be as stressful or more.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on August 21, 2010, 05:59:35 PM
So I noticed something on the swim home tonight. Whenever it's clear out and I've got my backpack on, my back gets all sweaty. But when it's raining my back is bone-dry. One of the great mysteries of the universe.

Also, my uniform pants have this weave that forces my undies to bunch up in my buttcrack.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on August 21, 2010, 07:06:59 PM
With a legend?  Because these guys seem lost!  :D
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on August 23, 2010, 08:31:21 PM
So I got a new thing. It's risky, but it pays off big time. I tried it out and wow. It worked wonders. Just have to find the right people.

A guy and his wife comes in, I say "Hey buddy. You look like you need a drink. "He asks "What? Why?" I point at his wife. "Because you came in with THAT. Two beers?" He laughs, she laughs, I laugh.  They leave at the end of their meal and I get a big tip.

Last time I did it? I got $23 off of two people.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on August 24, 2010, 02:02:49 AM
I don't doubt it works on some people, but, I don't know, seems to me that if you keep doing that someone's bound to get nuclear pissed sooner or later.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 24, 2010, 03:00:21 AM
Yeah Lottel, that seems like a REALLY FUCKING BAD IDEA.

... not to put to fine a point on it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 24, 2010, 03:43:13 AM
But if he keeps doing it, he can afford the medical bills to recover from the inevitable face-punchin'.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 24, 2010, 03:46:17 AM
When I was working as a host/seater, a lady came in as the first customer of the shift and asked for a table in the nonsmoking section (this was years ago, in Tennessee, where they didn't have universal smoking-in-restaurant bans). I gestured toward the -completely empty- dining room and told her I could probably find her something. She went apeshit. "You'd better because I have asthma and" blah de fuckity blah. Some people got no sense of humor.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on August 24, 2010, 10:58:24 AM
I'm not saying I'm going to keep throwing that line out until I hit a good table again. More like I have this thing that worked amazingly once. And I'm going to keep it in my arsenal just in case it could come in handy.

Give me some credit, guys. Honestly.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on August 24, 2010, 11:13:03 AM
But its you, lottel!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on August 24, 2010, 11:23:59 AM
Which should be part of the reason why you are giving me credit.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on August 24, 2010, 11:46:02 AM
I give you the benefit of the doubt! Does that close enough?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on August 24, 2010, 12:50:30 PM
You are generally a cool guy but I refuse to give credit to the customer service strategy of insulting a man's woman, even as a joke.

I have been around too many women who would laugh at such a comment and apparently brush it off but would then obsess over it for months to the point of depression.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on August 24, 2010, 01:19:50 PM
Lottel's a good waiter probably because he can judge people effectively by their appearance and the way they carry themselves. I think he knows who to use this strategy on, and who to not use this strategy on.

People don't do well in these jobs without that kind of instinct.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: James Edward Smith on August 24, 2010, 01:33:06 PM
I dunno, I really don't understand who that could worked on. I mean... insulting a guy's wife who you don't know while she is right there... that seems stupendously retarded.

It seems more like it would have to work the other way. Like, you insult a woman's husband's looks and then elbow nudge him to indicate you're not really busting his balls, you're just giving his wife a laugh because the common joke is that guys let themselves go once they are married (unless they are cheating) and guys don't feel self conscious about their looks once a woman marries them because our society doesn't make men care that much about their appearance outside of attracting a woman.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 24, 2010, 01:37:26 PM
You are generally a cool guy but I refuse to give credit to the customer service strategy of insulting a man's woman, even as a joke.

I have been around too many women who would laugh at such a comment and apparently brush it off but would then obsess over it for months to the point of depression.

I dunno, I really don't understand who that could worked on. I mean... insulting a guy's wife who you don't know while she is right there... that seems stupendously retarded.

It seems more like it would have to work the other way. Like, you insult a woman's husband's looks and then elbow nudge him to indicate you're not really busting his balls, you're just giving his wife a laugh because the common joke is that guys let themselves go once they are married (unless they are cheating) and guys don't feel self conscious about their looks once a woman marries them because our society doesn't make men care that much about their appearance outside of attracting a woman.

Agree on both counts.



Also: Hey they did decide to fire me after all.

:badtimes:

... A week before the office is federally inspected by Health Canada. And a huge part of the inspection would have been them asking what I do and how I do it.

:schadenfreude:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on August 24, 2010, 03:42:28 PM
Aw geez

You gonna be okay, big guy?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Detonator on August 24, 2010, 04:09:27 PM
I think I actually agree with Lottel on this one.  It seems mean spirited when written here, but if delivered with enough grace and comedic timing (and good judgment) it can be fine.  Obviously Lottel has enough of that to get by.

Besides, I don't think it was supposed to be taken as "oh my god, you're married to THAT ugly thing?" as much as "you poor guy, having to be here with your wife and not your drinking buddies".  I don't think calling someone's wife ugly would go over well in any situation (unless you're Jimmy Soul).  Or maybe if the wife is so obviously hot that it would be instantly seen as an ironic joke (but still probably not).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 24, 2010, 05:55:13 PM
It's like Poker.  If you know how to play the cards, how to read people, and when to quit, you can win big.

But if you play constantly, eventually somebody will have to break your kneecaps.


Also congratulations on your escape from a hell you've been complaining about for the past couple years, Mongrel.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on August 24, 2010, 06:21:06 PM
Besides, I don't think it was supposed to be taken as "oh my god, you're married to THAT ugly thing?" as much as "you poor guy, having to be here with your wife and not your drinking buddies".

Well, one of the differences between those statements is that one completely dehumanizes the wife, and one doesn't.  The fact that he's saying "THAT" instead of "HER" lends credence to the more misogynist interpretation.

This is a good way to get punched in the face, and you'll absolutely deserve it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 24, 2010, 06:40:39 PM
Also congratulations on your escape from a hell you've been complaining about for the past couple years, Mongrel.

This isn't the same place I was at two years ago though. It's also not really all THAT great escaping. If it was, I'd have left already of my own free will.

I mean six years, three jobs. I'd be three-for-three on getting fired, but I quit the first one before things became totally ridiculous. The other two I rode into the ground.

Hell, I know I'm totally unsuited to working in a conventional office environment, but it's the only thing I'm qualified to do and I still owe tons of money for my student loans, so while the usual speil of "You should go back to school" is probably correct, it's not really practical.

Been jamming my square peg into round holes [innuendo joke goes here] for near a decade now. It's pretty tiresome at this point.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 25, 2010, 06:01:44 AM
Didn't get the job I interviewed for,  and got cut yesterday instead of getting some training on the line. The search for greener pastures continues.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on August 25, 2010, 07:33:34 AM
After this week, my job will either rise to heaven or sink to hell.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on August 25, 2010, 08:58:58 AM
Really? It's not going to just drift through Purgatory?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 25, 2010, 09:36:41 AM
Heh. First update.

So, my main contact with "What's going on" is the sales rep for western canada, who I got along really well with. She's already promised me a really nice letter of recommendation and some useful advice and info. Yay!

But the funny bit is this: So far, the company's intial Brilliant Plan™ is to have the Salespeople enter orders (remember: I was the only customer service dork or order jockey for the entire country).

This is a sales force that has been missing a Quebec rep for over 6 months and has never worked with the order entry software ever. Their backup plan was also to ask - after the fact - if any of them are bilingual (nope!).

:glee:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on August 25, 2010, 09:45:56 AM
What was their official reason for canning you, anyway?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 25, 2010, 10:15:05 AM
For deliberately sending out a dozen orders on expired pricing (at the request of the Sales/Account Manager for that account, though he later denied asking me to do so), violating prolicy and the integrity of the system to do so. 

There's a process in place where the Sales/Account Manager for that account technically could have requested an extension, but while they'd tell you "Of course we would have done that." now, I can damn well tell you they would NOT have approved it at the time we got the orders. We DID ask for extensions a couple of times and man, was there a lot of hellfire that followed. The job of the Sales/Account Manager who asked was threatened for asking.

Without an extension, the hospitals would have been required to pay a premium - without warning - of roughly 50% to 200% depending on the item, effectively blackmailing the hospital due to our own massive incompetance. I can also tell you that there are at least a half-dozen major hospital groups that are waiting on products RIGHT NOW that we hadn't shipped yet because of arguments over incorrect prices.

Hell, I DID wind up following the official 'blackmail' policy many times, and hated it every time we did it. 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Dooly on August 25, 2010, 01:23:04 PM
For deliberately sending out a dozen orders on expired pricing (at the request of the Sales/Account Manager for that account, though he later denied asking me to do so), violating prolicy and the integrity of the system to do so.

I'm guessing he didn't put that request in writing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 25, 2010, 03:24:25 PM
Nope.

Oh I knew it was a risk and a dumb thing to do.

Ultimately? My boss hated me was a schoolmarm who believed from the very first day that I 'must always be trying to get away with something', whereas the sales guys treated me great. I decided that even if they were manipulating me purely for their own ends, I was more than happy to be manipulated.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on August 26, 2010, 06:53:39 PM
My night started off with one of those wonderful customers that just ruins your whole night.
This old lady shows up acting incredibly spaced out. I asked her for her card or ID four or five times while she rambled on without really acknowledging that I was saying anything (I'm only now realizing that she was probably talking to herself and not to me). Eventually when I asked her for it a fifth or sixth time she was all "is there some sort of problem, because I can take my business elsewhere" or whatever.

Of course, I'm not allowed to say anything.

In the end, she didn't even have a real ID. I made her an account with her work ID, even though I can get fired for that and grouped her items to save her as much money as possible and recieved nothing but grief because she refused to cooperate.


I think the policy where customers are allowed to complain about staff but staff aren't allowed to complain about customers should be fixed. Apparently Wal-Mart is finally starting to slacken its "the customer is always right" mantra, so hopefully the rest of the retail world follows suit and people start remembering that you are supposed to actually acknowledge that there is a human being on the other side of the counter.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 26, 2010, 07:27:14 PM
I'd like to think that, but really it'll just be an excuse for even more people to be rude whenever they feel like it.

Not that I don't agree that it's a stupid policy.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on August 26, 2010, 09:06:44 PM
I think the best thing you could have done in that situation was told her to take her business elsewhere.

If there's a policy that you can't take a work ID to make an account with, you need to follow the policy. If somebody fires you for not helping her, you can file wrongful termination or at least get unemployment.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on August 26, 2010, 09:13:57 PM
So okay.  Apparently a few weeks back Dwight's inventory turned up short a couple of laptops.  Not brand new ones, more like two-year-old ones; the sort of thing we can still send out to people who don't want to budget a new laptop, but, in practice, I have like 15 of the suckers just collecting dust because nobody wants them.

[...]

The upshot of this is that now [...] we have to count everything, every day.  Like, down to every single fucking stick of RAM.

And by "we", well, you can see where I'm going with this.  So yeah, my morning inventory that used to take 10 minutes now takes about 45.  I am, of course, expected to fit just as much work into the rest of the day as I did before.

And it didn't hit me until yesterday, but the new inventory sheet they gave me that I have to fill out each and every single morning, to make sure nothing like that ever happens again?

Guess what model of laptop isn't actually on it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rosencrantz on August 26, 2010, 10:22:09 PM
The Air Force once blamed me for losing an old laptop that I didn't actually lose and charged me $1500 for it. The worst part was that a guy spent about a year investigating it, and his official statement said that I was not to be held responsible for the damn thing... so of course the military pinned it on me anyway.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on August 29, 2010, 03:04:49 PM
http://culturemap.com/newsdetail/08-29-10-the-angelika-suddenly-closes-houston-loses-its-downtown-film-center/ (http://culturemap.com/newsdetail/08-29-10-the-angelika-suddenly-closes-houston-loses-its-downtown-film-center/)

The theater I work at is now literally the only first run arthouse theater in Houston.  Things are going to become insane for us in short order, I imagine.  I'm not sure yet if this is part of heaven or hell.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on August 29, 2010, 03:32:03 PM
Soon your marquees will be the talk of the town.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 01, 2010, 10:59:23 AM
So, over the last week some interesting stuff has been happening.

The company offered me a month's salary in exchange for a release of claim, money I could really use badly (I'm still pretty broke from paying for my trip in July to go to my cousin's wedding, though I did pay down some of that debt in August). I talked to an attorney about the whole thing, and he said I should send in a counter-offer asking for a pile of stuff since I had little to lose, but that he agreed I wouldn't get anything worthwhile if I actually tried to sue (which I had assumed from the start). 

A combination of factors affected any attempt at a counter-offer, the most important of which was that there was no one there who could even reply to one before their deadline for submitting the waiver was up. If I waited, I risked losing even that nominal one-month payment. So I split the difference, and submitted a letter asking for them to resecind their nasty letter of termination (it's pretty petty - the lawyer actually laughed at their choice of language) and to change the reason of termination to a neutral one. This is important for a variety of reasons, not least of which in Canada if you're fired with cause, you have to contest that to get employment insurance payments. I didn't ask for more money or anything complicated, and I sent in the waiver as a show of good faith (but still invoked the lawyer). Basically, all I want is for them to change the official reason I was fired to something neutral like "position restructured" or whatever.

I thought they'd blow me off and I would just be going through the motions, but surprisingly, I might just get what I want. Keepin' my fingers crossed, 'cause that will make things a lot easier for me going forward. I'll find out in a few days.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 02, 2010, 06:01:50 PM
Hm. Apparently they're totally inundated with calls from raging customers upset at my departure. And of course, they can't tell them why I'm gone.

Cold comfort I suppose.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on September 02, 2010, 06:06:45 PM
It's a pity that you couldn't meet face to face with some of those customers.  I'm sure one of them would have made a good ref...
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 02, 2010, 09:23:20 PM
Did I mention I'm being converted to permanent?  Apparently I didn't.  Must have been a little embarrassed announcing it in the middle of everybody else being thrown out on the street.

I found out a couple weeks ago that the one thing I was worried about - being salaried and not being paid overtime - didn't apply to people at my pay grade, and I found out today that the other thing I was worried about - being paid monthly - also doesn't apply to people at my pay grade.  It's still weekly by the hour.

Also the company usually demands a pay cut from temp-to-hires to offset all the PTO and benefits they'll be getting.  They also demanded a pay cut from me... of thirteen cents per hour.

Good times?  Good times.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on September 04, 2010, 12:23:36 AM
Five.
Five. That’s how many servers we had tonight.
Two. That’s how many we usually have.
One. How many we needed.

But fine. Fine. I get it. Two of the girls just started. They wanted to ease them into things and making sure I’m nearby to help. I can understand that. But having five people means not a lot of tables per person. Meaning they don’t get the work. Have one new girl tonight, one tomorrow. Give me Sunday off. There you go. Everyone gets tables in a nice, safe environment then get an easy Sunday to try it on their own without me. BUT THAT’S OK. I’M NOT A MANAGER.

On top of that, they completely changed how we do the tickets. And how we put food into the computer. And redid the entire dining room. And renamed all the tables. This afternoon. Right before Friday night rush. And without telling me. While two people just started their training.  I swear, sometimes it’s like they don’t think these things through to the next step. Sure, changing these things might make it more convenient for the lady who owns the restaurant next door to understand, but she doesn’t actually work with me. She doesn’t wait tables or anything. So it really doesn’t matter how the dining room is. But fine. Change it. Just let me know. And don’t do it on a Friday. Do it on a Monday, so we can get used to the change before a super busy day.

Took her aside today and had a talk, by the way. Told her that although I’m not a manager, I have worked here the longest, and I do have a lot of experience, and I also happen to be a human being. I’m not saying they have to run things by me, but a heads up or even asking my opinion on something would be nice. I mean, I run that floor. A little respect or forethought towards how I’d feel would be nice, you know? I also told here that yes, everyone left. And yes, I was liked working with them. But I still work there. And I plan on working there. And I want to work there. So everyone needs to stop treating me like I’m there out of spite, or secretly hate everyone or I’m going to quit at the drop of a hat or something. Every day I have this exchange “Hey, what’s with this? That doesn’t seem t-” “You don’t like it? Fucking quit then.” And they call me before every shift to see if I’m coming in.

I told the owner “Listen. I get it. I do. But this kind of stuff is really making my job not fun. I’m a great worker, I don’t ask for anything, and I help out the store and work off the clock. Not to mention I’ve trained everyone in the building myself. I really don’t see why I’m getting treated this way and why I’m not even considered worth asking first or even mentioning you are going to completely change how I do my job.” She apologized, said it wasn’t on purpose or anything and she’d make sure to consider what I said in the future. Which would be great. If her tone gave me any hope that she meant it.

I think I need to kick up my job hunt. I liked my job a lot. But they people there aren’t treating me well, the owners overlook me, and they changed the recipe. So now I don’t even like the food. All that’s keeping me there is the money and the customers. And with all these servers working at the same time (there will now be three to four at a time, until someone quits/gets fired) there’s not enough tables to go around to make money. As for the customers? We lost a lot when Jerry left. And a lot more when we changed the recipe. And we will lose a lot more still once they change more.

Here’s to hoping something turns out alright from all of this.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 04, 2010, 10:35:35 AM
So not only did I not get the "we're putting you on prep full-time next week" like I was promised, I'm now back in the dishpit full-time, losing the one weekly prep shift I had. And they hired a new line cook, so it's not for "labor costs". The search for a new job resumes.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 04, 2010, 10:52:34 AM
Also, we host the local chapter of the Florida State football team fan club. The restaurant is packed. I'm the only dishwasher for the next three hours.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on September 04, 2010, 10:53:53 AM
Surely I can't be the only one who wants to hire R^2, give him a big hug, and tell him everything's gonna be alright.

It really baffles me how many businesses actively treat their employees like shit.  I mean, hell, even giving employees the illusion that their input is valued makes most of them work harder and take stock in how the business performs.  Actually give them meaningful input for their position, and the manager has to do less work, the workflow is usually better designed, and you've got crazy loyalty.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 04, 2010, 03:22:42 PM
While you've effectively encapsulated the ten-week Management and Supervision course I took last winter, you are making the same faulty assumption I did when I was hired here: the business world, and doubly so the culinary industry, is rarely egalitarian.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 04, 2010, 03:24:25 PM
I'd be baking and selling to make some extra cash on the side, but lacking a storefront I'd need some way to deliver my product to fill my orders -- and my van is still nonfunctional, and will likely remain so until my income goes up. Catch 22.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on September 04, 2010, 05:49:32 PM
i would never condone baking illicit substances into various sweet treats and selling them to all your local college kids but you know

would jail really be such a downturn now if things got out of hand
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on September 04, 2010, 07:45:01 PM
So near the end of my shift today, I'm between deliveries and we get a call in from our head delivery driver. This is how it goes:

Me: "Thank you for calling Sapulpa Dominoes, my name is Eric, how can I help you today?"
Him: "LET ME TALK TO AUDREY" (Our manager)
Me: "Please don't yell in my ear, Mike."
Him: "Fuck you, I didn't yell in your ear, let me talk to Audrey."

His wife, our shift runner (think assistant to the assistant manager) comes up to take the phone from me, because I'm due out on a delivery. I hand her the phone and curtly say, "Tell your husband not to scream in my god damn ear" and leave on my run. I'm pretty mad but keeping my cool. This is the workplace after all.

A couple hours go by and I forget about it, the day's been running long so I'm just starting to get on my late driver cleaning, and Melissa (the head driver's wife) pulls me into the office. With a writeup. For disrespecting her, and her husband.

Me: "Disrespecting the head driver? Are you kidding me, he screamed in my ear"
Her: "Well, you threw the phone at me and you were rude to Mike and he didn't scream in your ear"
Me: "You were taking the phone from me! this is bullshit!"
Her: "That's it, you're suspended!"
Me: "You know what? I quit, go fuck yourself."

And that's how my day went! Now that I'm thinking a little more rationally, I'll probably call the owner at some point tomorrow and try to suss this out with them, at least to salvage my ability to use this place as a reference, if not my job, though to be perfectly honest at every step she and her husband mishandled the situation. The lead driver should be respecting the other drivers. Lead by example. And a shift runner shouldn't be writing you up for being disrespectful to her fucking husband. According to policy, they're not even supposed to be working at the same store because she's in management.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on September 04, 2010, 07:46:29 PM
https://info.dominos.com/dominos_pizza/contact.nsf/frmContact?openform
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on September 04, 2010, 07:51:03 PM
I'm going to try to go through the owners of the franchise first, but I fully intend to go to corporate if things don't pan out for me in a positive way. The Franchise owners are already in trouble with corporate for a variety of reasons, and having a gross breach of policy and legitimate accusations of favoritism aren't going to do them any favors - best case scenario (for them) is that they would get out of the situation with a fine. It'd be pretty damning if they didn't discipline them, because they're close friends with the couple in question, to the point of renting them out land they own and such.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 04, 2010, 08:05:26 PM
At this point integrity is pretty much all I have anymore, so I'm going to stick to the up-and-up. If it weren't for that, I'd be posting my own "Fuck it, I quit" story to match Shinra's.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on September 05, 2010, 03:55:45 AM
The reason I walked out wasn't just that one event, to be honest. I've been working there for eight months and it's always something stupid like this. The level of general respect in this place is lower than any other place I've ever worked in my life - I've never been in a job environment where it was acceptable for management to scream in your ear for minor mistakes. The worst situation of them all - the only one before this that made me truly, seriously consider walking out - was when the daughter of the franchise owner spent 20 minutes berating me for working slowly and not paying attention the day after my cat died. My cat who I'd had for seven years, who was the best cat I ever owned, and the only gift my late father ever gave to me that wasn't him just trying to puff himself up and make himself look impressive. (My parents were divorced, so we went through a superdad phase until I was about 13)

You just get to the point where anyone with even a modicum of self respect Can't Take One God Damn More Second Of This Shit, and you have to leave. I'm not going to be bullied and disrespected anymore after eight fucking months on the job. And not a lazy, shitty, mediocre eight months, eight months where I've busted my ass and pulled my weight. You want to yell at the new guy who keeps fucking up and costing us money, sure, you want to yell at me because you're mad at the new guy, go fuck yourself forever. I'm nobody's punching bag. The shit with Mike yelling in my ear? Probably pissed at a customer who was being shitty with him, or pissed because the address in the system was wrong for the customer. So either it's the customer's fault, or his stupid wife's fault for punching in the address right. Either scenario? Yeah. Don't yell in my fucking ear.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 05, 2010, 07:32:17 AM
I didn't mean to imply you lack integrity, I just meant that professionalism is the only reason I stay at -my- shitty job. But hey, I have seven hours between the end of today's mandatory all-staff meeting and my shift starting this evening, so it's time to pound some pavement and drop off some resumes.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 05, 2010, 10:58:55 AM
Shinra, I still remember your story of specifically applying for that job because it was low-stress compared to your previous one, and your manager being incredulous about it.

I thought it was amazing that you went on to assert that it really was low stress and that the sort of multicolored trash you'd inevitably have to deal with working in a low-end position like that wasn't driving you batty back then.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 05, 2010, 11:54:52 AM
Job hunt: two places flat-out aren't hiring, three places took applications, four places gave advice like "Come back tomorrow" or "Try the restaurant in Buckhead instead." There are nice restaurants all over the place near my school, and I barely scratched the surface today.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on September 05, 2010, 02:12:42 PM
Shinra, I still remember your story of specifically applying for that job because it was low-stress compared to your previous one, and your manager being incredulous about it.

I thought it was amazing that you went on to assert that it really was low stress and that the sort of multicolored trash you'd inevitably have to deal with working in a low-end position like that wasn't driving you batty back then.

Honestly? This still isn't as stressful as my last job. Just irritating. It's complicated.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on September 05, 2010, 02:40:51 PM
Wow, you guys

I kinda love bartending.

As a person who does not drink this comes a surprise to me.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Misha on September 05, 2010, 03:01:00 PM
niku make me a colorado bulldog
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on September 05, 2010, 03:06:30 PM
He makes the bar... tender.

Niku do you make the bar tender
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 05, 2010, 03:22:19 PM
That would make him a bartenderizer.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on September 05, 2010, 04:20:07 PM
I'd like ten pounds of steaks from the bar chuck, cut 1 and a half inch thick. And trim the fucking rind. I'm not paying 5.98 a pound for bar lard.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on September 05, 2010, 04:52:52 PM
niku make me a colorado bulldog

poof

Poochinski clip (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lFKqr5GhcxQ#)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: SCD on September 10, 2010, 07:31:10 PM
Part time job just changed drastically for the better in the jolly ol circus where everyone wears green.  Am now in charge of twice as many people, all of them are experienced types.  In the pool includes an engineer, a guy who owns a mobile tech-support franchise, a guy whose been a force tech and is in his 50's, and some other cool cats who are all fit.  My boss's boss also started to get involved on my issue which restricts me from playing ball that I've talked about to some here. 

Things are getting pretty interesting.  I love my hobby...   
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on September 10, 2010, 07:54:52 PM
the jolly ol circus where everyone wears green.

You joined a morris dancing troupe?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 11, 2010, 10:15:09 AM
There are three tables open in this restaurant. The rest are filled with drunken football fans. All of them will leave within a span of about half  an hour when the game ends. Third quarter now. I'm the only dishwasher here for three hours, again.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 11, 2010, 10:16:16 AM
Compare last Tuesday, where we had two dishwashers. I got here at six, did my first actual work at seven, and asked to be cut at ten for lack of anything to do.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on September 13, 2010, 09:44:01 PM
Looks like we're hitting end-of-year budget panic time again and HR wants to find people to lay off.  Hasn't actually started happening yet but boss is a little freaked out over it.

While I would really like to continue having a job, I can't really muster a whole lot of give-a-fuck either.  It has become clear to me that any change in my employment at this point is entirely up to the whims of people I have never met who have no working idea of just what the fuck it is I do.  I guess on the plus side, this means I don't have to go out of my way to prove anything to anybody, because the people in my department already know how indispensable I am -- they're just not the ones calling the shots.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 15, 2010, 11:39:39 AM
Update.

So, tentatively speaking, it seems like they're not going to terminate me with cause. I say tentatively, because I'm not going to credit that until the actual record of employment arrives and that's confirmed in print, but hopefully that will make things (a little) easier for me.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on September 15, 2010, 01:58:10 PM
So I picked up my last paycheck today. They were actually very nice and apologized about how things went down. They invited me to drinks on Sunday. My brain hurts.


Oh. Right. I forgot to say something here. I got fired last Tuesday officially because "I didn't close properly on Sunday and it was the last straw." Unofficially because I was the last employee left from the original boss. OH WELL.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 15, 2010, 02:55:38 PM
Hey clutch I don't know what your company is but if it's a restaurant I can think of a line cook and a couple of servers who are looking for work and, ya know, not bottom-feeding scum-sucking algae-eaters.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 18, 2010, 10:19:19 AM
Last week was supposed to be my first week as a regular employee.  I never got a login to my new timecard system, never got access to any other systems (benefits, training, etc), and last night I got the same "Welcome to our training program!" email from the temp agency that I got when I was first hired.

Gonna have to suspend judgment until someone confirms what I think that means.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 18, 2010, 04:11:22 PM
Depending on who you ask and how much of the half-Spanish explanation you understand, one of the other dishwashers threatened another of the other dishwashers with a knife or hit him with a glasses tray or something. Because of that altercation the dishwasher/busser job has been split into two positions. I'm not even working in the kitchen half the time anymore.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on September 18, 2010, 08:18:41 PM
Yesterday at work I was shanghaied into posing with a group of teenagers for a photo scavenger hunt.

If you ever come across a picture of a group of kids kneeling around someone in a Sobeys uniform holding up a broom like Luke Skywalker holds his lightsaber on the Star Wars poster...

oh, who am I kidding. It'll never happen.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 24, 2010, 10:14:39 AM
On my way to the working interview now. It's for a place I've never worked for, for a job I've never done professionally, when I don't know any of the recipes or have any training where I'm going. This is going to be... challenging.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on September 24, 2010, 10:48:52 AM
Just remember that they'll want you because your vuvezula wang is a big win for equal opportunity.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: James Edward Smith on September 24, 2010, 11:01:31 AM
I have a job working as a game developer. It is cool but I find it hard to find the energy to work on my own games after the working day is done but I hope to circumvent this and losing my mind by mostly just working on them on the weekend because I am lazy and stress prone.

Anyway I'm at work now, better get back to work. work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work

*Whistle*

work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work.

At 5pm today I will get a beer from the taps here at work and then maybe play board games.

This has been my long, boring post about work a topic usually only interesting to yourself and no one else unless your job is being a crab fisherman, a lumberjack, a firefighter, a cop, a custom shop mechanic or a pawnshop owner.

BLOG POST COMPLETE.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on September 24, 2010, 11:20:54 AM
I went and collected my final paycheck today. Went pretty well - no hard feelings either way, despite the fact I didn't give two week notice.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on September 24, 2010, 03:39:18 PM
Yeah, things descended to hell (no big surprise) so I'm back to looking for something new.  At least it's nice to finally know who does (everyone but the head manager) and doesn't (the head manager) have my back there.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on September 24, 2010, 03:57:43 PM
Is there some sort of requirement that you have to be a complete dickhead to become a manager?

I mean do they just give people a multiple choice test and only promote those who check off the "kick puppy" option?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 24, 2010, 04:04:51 PM
I think the cart is probably pulling the horse in this case.

As an example, go play Wolf or TF2 or some cooperative game until your team does ssomething forehead-slappingly retarded that fucks you over.

Now realize that this is how most managers feel all the time.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on September 24, 2010, 04:16:00 PM
It's probably like the fallout 3 aptitude test! Complete with the joke question at the end!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 24, 2010, 05:09:23 PM
Classic perhaps you are confusing me with that other boards-comics drawing chap, one Sir Disposable P. Ninja. Anyway, the estage went pretty well. No massive VICTORY to make them hire me on the spot, but no FOOD FAILURE either. I'll know next week
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 24, 2010, 08:54:29 PM
If I had screwed up some item and been dismissed on the spot, it'd have seriously disappointed me. But I wouldn't be able to post about it on account of not knowing whether to put it in this thread, Shit Days, or What's Cookin'.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 24, 2010, 09:32:05 PM
On the subject of managers.

Management - the ability to read, lead, and motivate other people - is a talent, not a skill.

Like any other talent, you can improve it with training and practice and if you rank among the untalented, you can learn enough enough about management to fake it a bit, but will never really 'get' it. In the same way that someone with no artistic talent can still learn lots of art history and art theory, become an art critic and talk about art all day. But this does not make them artists.

But we can never afford to admit this, because rigid hierarchies have become so formal, massive, and common that there's a need for thousands upon thousands of managers. Far more than will ever arise naturally. So in most cases, all they do is simply promote the most reliable and hardest-working individual and then pay for their management classes. Upper management sends these idiots to a school for management so they can get a nice rubber stamp and everyone's happy. Except the hapless underlings.

Sadly, hard work and reliability do not mean a person has great social skills. In fact, it sometimes indicates the opposite (though not always... it's not like I would argue that lazy, irresponsible idiots make the best managers). Peter principle. So it goes.

Or else some asshole promotes a relative or friend. That happens too.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 24, 2010, 09:48:50 PM
Peter principle.

Your entire post in two words.

...except for the sentence directly before it which implies that that's what you think the Peter Principle is.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on September 25, 2010, 05:33:08 AM
Peter Principle picked a platoon of probationary processing 'prentices.
A posse of persecuted plebes did Peter Principle pick.
If Peter Principle practiced proper picking procedures
Perhaps Peter Principle wouldn't be such a prick.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 25, 2010, 02:16:09 PM
Peter principle.

Your entire post in two words.

I don't know. I don't think invoking the Peter Principle would necessarily imply the bit about "management herding cats is an art, rather than a trainable skill". I think that's a, well... there's some overlap between the two, but ultimately I would consider them separate things.

Quote
...except for the sentence directly before it which implies that that's what you think the Peter Principle is.

That wasn't intended that way though. I gave the first line as-is regarding social ability, and added Peter Principle as an additional generalized reason.

People being promoted above their ability is a big part of why most managers are bad, but it's not the whole story.

BLAH BLAH BLAH :tldr:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on September 28, 2010, 08:35:54 AM
Several lead tech positions have quit, others are quitting to avoid the growing katamari of responsibilities that is being pushed on them as a result of others leaving.

I just wish it had Katamari music to make it less depressing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on September 28, 2010, 08:37:24 AM
You are smart! You are smart!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on September 28, 2010, 11:53:59 AM
I called up a place that had offered me an interview a while back when I was still at my previous job. At the time it was out of the way, and not amazing in comparison to what I had at the time. So I had called up to see if anything was still available. The tech support job, that would have been awesome? Filled.

I was offered an interview for a sales position, however.
::(:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on September 28, 2010, 02:16:56 PM
So, there are two other managers at my level. One just had a kid and has reduced availability. The other just gave notice today. We don't really have any candidates for promotion. Thus begins my campaign for a meaningful raise to deal with the buckets of shit about to be dumped straight on my lap.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 28, 2010, 04:06:07 PM
Worked for me.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on September 30, 2010, 04:48:37 PM
"we'll keep your name in reserve in case anyone drops"
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 30, 2010, 06:58:57 PM
"We'd rather hold off on hiring entirely than hire you."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on October 06, 2010, 07:09:02 AM
Interview today.  Fingers crossed.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Frocto on October 06, 2010, 09:06:59 AM
Just remember: Satan is on your side
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on October 06, 2010, 12:27:47 PM
I am also on your side, but I do not know if that's helpful. You should tell us about it. We can have ice cream and cocoa.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on October 06, 2010, 12:39:50 PM
What are you applying for? I hope its better than your current gig.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on October 06, 2010, 12:54:30 PM
It's a tech support position, but at a company that looks pretty fantastic and would most likely have better hours than my current job and definitely better pay.  I'll know by Friday if I have a job there or not, they told me.  I feel like the interview went pretty well, but I am not a computer science dork no matter how much of a general dork I am.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on October 06, 2010, 01:06:35 PM
Chances are pretty good they're hire you, having worked tech support for, basically all you need to know is how to move your mouse and type without shitting in your hand and throwing it at your coworkers.

Hell, at some places, they don't even care. Chimpy was the best tier 2 tech I ever knew. Shame about all the feces.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on October 06, 2010, 01:08:11 PM
Well, technical skills can be gained. What's important is your personal acumen, friendliness, and willingness to help people! Good luck!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on October 06, 2010, 02:21:50 PM
Have you ever called tech support before?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on October 06, 2010, 06:38:27 PM
It's an odd dichotomy. At school I have to prepare dishes I've never heard of, using techniques I've never used, under a strict time limit and judged by a professional chef. At work they won't let me make so much as a turkey sandwich.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on October 06, 2010, 09:35:48 PM
Have you ever called tech support before?
No. I just like lying to people.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on October 09, 2010, 06:56:06 AM
"We'll call or e-mail you by Friday whether you get the job or not"

>no call or e-mail on friday
>holiday weekend

fffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on October 11, 2010, 03:03:29 PM
Job get.

Two weeks notice in.

:perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on October 11, 2010, 03:31:56 PM
Why I wear a chef uniform every time I turn in an application: sometimes the kitchen manager will drop what he's doing to talk to you immediately. Just had a promising impromptu interview; if it goes as well as that estage a couple weeks ago I'm -- well, completely fucked. So let's hope it goes "new job" better.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on October 11, 2010, 03:34:11 PM
Congratulations, niku! Hope you get the job R^2!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on October 11, 2010, 03:47:58 PM
If R^2 doesn't get something soon I will give him mine.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on October 11, 2010, 04:05:38 PM
Got a new job working as a driver at another pizza place in town. Unlike Domino's, this place does 80% of their business as delivery. They have a delivery radius that's literally about 150% larger, but they're at the intersection of two interstates, so i can zip to most of my destinations at 70mph. Pay's lower, but more deliveries a night. Should be good times.

I think I'll use this opportunity to save money and start going to school to get my CDL.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on October 11, 2010, 04:57:16 PM
And you're sure the head driver doesn't have an attitude problem or anything?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on October 13, 2010, 08:39:10 AM
Got promoted the other day from lesson-testing-guy to author! Now I actually get to build these things instead of just fixing 'em!

I will post a video of my first lesson later. It is entitled Wasps: Zero Percent Mercy.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on October 14, 2010, 08:45:26 PM
And you're sure the head driver doesn't have an attitude problem or anything?

Well, if he does, it shouldn't be a problem for long. The wife and I are getting into the world of OTR trucking as soon as I can get my CDL, which I will hopefully be started on before the end of the year. I need to find the most economical education option first - there are a lot of companies out here who will train you, but you basically become an indentured servant for 2-3 years afterwards, which leaves a pretty bad taste in my mouth. This probably won't cost me more than 5 grand, and since I'm horribly low income, I can probably apply for a loan even with my bad credit to just take a course at a community college or tech school or something.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Healy on October 26, 2010, 08:28:51 AM
Today I found out when I changed my shifts for Tuesday I accidently gave myself one less hour than what I usually work. Pretty dumb mistake, but not really a big deal, overall.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on October 26, 2010, 11:31:11 AM
People have been vanishing from my training class one by one.  I suspect they're being fed to us for lunch.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on October 26, 2010, 11:39:50 AM
Why would you suspect that? Did the food taste exceptionally abused?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on October 26, 2010, 12:22:19 PM
Any time people vanish from my life I just automatically assume they're being ground up into mystery meat.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Detonator on October 26, 2010, 12:25:12 PM
Arc noooooooooooooo
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Smiler on October 26, 2010, 01:00:21 PM
We all have a little bit of Arc inside of us.

It's because we ate part of him.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Dooly on October 26, 2010, 01:09:22 PM
They wouldn't feed them to you, they'd feed them to the company CEO or the shareholders or something.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on October 26, 2010, 01:31:21 PM
For a minute that was a really disturbing revelation about Niku.
But then I realized I was confusing guro and vore! So it's all OK again.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 26, 2010, 02:48:07 PM
If you eat part of the brain, you gain their powers.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on October 26, 2010, 03:51:33 PM
I never understood that tradition.  If you're eating their heart/brain, it means they had shitty powers.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on October 26, 2010, 03:52:42 PM
Oh god I just walked right into a TV Tropes reference.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on October 31, 2010, 07:01:14 AM
Nicolas Cage Wants Cake (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PJddmfesaA#ws)

The other night I was working, a lady came in and asked for one of these "monster" cakes that we had advertised in the flyer (it's composed of cupcakes and shaped like a monster. typical Halloween stuff). We didn't have any. She phoned up her daughter to see what her granddaughter would accept as an alternative. Normally, this wouldn't be so bad, except it was twenty minutes to closing, and I still had to sweep up, so I was sort of nervous.

She asked if we had anything with Barney on it that we could put on a cake. I knew we didn't, but I made a half-hearted attempt to search anyway. Then she asked me what we DID have. She was desperate. I tried to list off as much as I could, but when I get cornered like that, I turn into Jeff Goldblum. Rather than waste the last ten minutes of my shift stuttering and mumbling , I just dragged out the bitz boxes and she could make her own decision.

FIVE MINUTES she stood there, reading labels into her phone. And finally, finally, she settled on the light-up Disney princess toppers. I quickly assembled a presentable chocolate cake from the self-serve cooler and handed it off to her. She was grateful. It was 9pm at this point, so I did what any sane person would do: drag out the time so I could get an extra 15 minutes on my paycheque.

Bill Cosby - Dad is Great brings me Chocolate Cake (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sRmN4KnfPxQ#)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on October 31, 2010, 09:48:15 PM
So I just got hired for a job I never applied for!
I now have two jobs!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on October 31, 2010, 10:54:00 PM
There's a river?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on November 01, 2010, 09:17:19 AM
I've come to the realization that I absolutely hate programming as a day job.  I do not like the current environment I work in.  It's not very friendly, there's a lot of power politics going on, and I am not learning anything nor have the personal drive to do better.

So I'm going to take a 20k a year pay cut and go be a tier 1 helpdesk jockey.  I hate this job that much.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on November 01, 2010, 02:08:40 PM
high five helpdesk jockey bro
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on November 01, 2010, 08:25:28 PM
Did one of our bros get lucky 777!?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on November 02, 2010, 01:58:59 PM
Oh oh oh this is just great.  Now I am diagnosed with carpal tunnel syndrome in my right wrist.  Brace and meds for a month, 20% chance of corrective surgery. YAY.

Sort of need that hand for eight hours a day of coding (and excessive TF2 after hours).  Its not impossible, I just need time to adapt to the damn thing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on November 04, 2010, 08:13:58 AM
Vacation Pay was this week. I can finally start reducing my credit card debt.

JUST IN TIME FOR CHRISTMAS

sigh
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on November 04, 2010, 09:17:40 AM
Oh oh oh this is just great.  Now I am diagnosed with carpal tunnel syndrome in my right wrist.  Brace and meds for a month, 20% chance of corrective surgery. YAY.

I never had a diagnosis, but certainly had the symptoms a few years back.  I use an MS Natural keyboard, a Logitech trackball at work, and an Evoluent VerticalMouse at home and they all seem to have helped.  I also wore a wrist brace for a time, mostly to bed, but haven't needed to for a long time.

Also I quit doing pushups.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on November 04, 2010, 12:08:12 PM
Have you tried push up stands? They're pretty awesome.

The promotion I was gunning for is effective today. I'm not looking forward to dealing with the extra bullshit but I managed to stay hourly with a salaried benefits package!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on November 04, 2010, 03:05:45 PM
I got offered to be bumped from part time to full time today.  Before my training is even finished.  :perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on November 07, 2010, 06:23:51 AM
On the other hand, my training schedule ended and my work schedule began the very next day.  Which took me from a morning shift to a past midnight shift.  I have restfulness whiplash.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on November 07, 2010, 07:44:17 AM
Niku are the rumors true that you're bartendin' these days?

I-is there good-natured ribbing and irreverent banter involved?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on November 07, 2010, 08:57:34 AM
In the past four weeks my paychecks have totaled almost exactly $400.

This does not augur well for my paying the rent, my now-overdue school tuition, my remaining phone bill, or my insurance.

Tuesday when I have a day off I'm headed for the Department of Labor to see if I can draw underemployment. I've asked everyone I know to pass on any contacts they might have for cook jobs in the area.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on November 07, 2010, 09:13:07 AM
Niku are the rumors true that you're bartendin' these days?

I-is there good-natured ribbing and irreverent banter involved?

Was, but not anymore.  Which sucks because I was enjoying it, but is probably for the best since I was winging everything hilariously due to having no reference point on account of not imbibing the devil's piss.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on November 07, 2010, 09:16:22 AM
Nikuuuu. Do you need someone to cure you of your good decisions???
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on November 07, 2010, 02:36:54 PM
Got promoted the other day from lesson-testing-guy to author! Now I actually get to build these things instead of just fixing 'em!

I will post a video of my first lesson later. It is entitled Wasps: Zero Percent Mercy.

Wasps: Zero Percent Mercy (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cx2HWwBSDnw#ws)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on November 07, 2010, 03:23:26 PM
Can this PLEASE be followed by Moths: Fuck yeah
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on November 07, 2010, 04:45:45 PM
How about Moths: What's so Great About Them?

With optional additional subtitle:
Really, I don't get the appeal.
Lottel should explain why I should give two shits be excited about moths.

EDIT:
Sorry, I'm in such a habit of being a complete asshat at all times I was accidentally an asshat to lottel! Worse, lottel, to my memory, has done me no wrong! Please forgive me Mr. Lottel!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 07, 2010, 04:58:26 PM
Perhaps you should try a different tactic.  Might I recommend shutting up, Classic?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on November 07, 2010, 05:32:27 PM
To Brent, admitting fault and making an apology, as inelegant as it might be, is comparable to being an asshat.
How enlightening.

How about, instead, you let lottel be offended on his own behalf. He's a cool dude. He's not going to lose his shit because I don't get why he likes moths.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on November 07, 2010, 05:34:20 PM
the finest video of our time

i would like to give you one thousand high-fives for this
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on November 07, 2010, 05:54:40 PM
Gentlemen please!

Can we not put our differences aside for but a moment and fear these abyssal pitspawn as one??
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on November 07, 2010, 05:56:48 PM
Wow, Kabbage. Apart from some spelling errors, that was a very compelling video. You're like a latter-day Jacques Cousteau!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on November 07, 2010, 05:58:52 PM
My only concern is that it may be too awesome for mainstream consumption. Surely this is proof-of-concept re: awesomeness of The Kabbage?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on November 07, 2010, 05:59:02 PM
My only concern is that it may be too awesome for mainstream consumption. Surely this is proof-of-concept re: awesomeness of The Kabbage?

It was sort of a test run project so I could show that I could put together and script one of these things right before they gave me THE KEYS TO BEING THE PRESIDENT OF TEACHING

Wow, Kabbage. Apart from some spelling errors, that was a very compelling video. You're like a latter-day Jacques Cousteau!

I KNOW
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on November 07, 2010, 06:07:18 PM
also how sick is that INTRO STING

That's an industry term folks a musical introductory STING

In essence you are " ' stung (in as such as a wasp might if agitated) ' " by the intro and thus " ' under attack ' " by LEARNING
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on November 07, 2010, 06:11:02 PM
The emotions did run so high as to make me sick, yes.
Thank you for explaining the awesome joke. I totally did not get it.

It's probably outside of your budget to get a human to read the narration instead of using Microsoft Sam/Mike/Whoever that was, huh?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 07, 2010, 08:13:19 PM
Oscar winner.

All categories.

Oscar's jersey is also retired.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Smiler on November 07, 2010, 09:27:38 PM
This would appear to be the sin of wanting to build your kid a tree fort without a torrid swarm of unholy fiendspawn perpetuation a long, bitter, territorial war of attrition.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: ObliviousObi on November 07, 2010, 09:56:03 PM


It's probably outside of your budget to get a human to read the narration instead of using Microsoft Sam/Mike/Whoever that was, huh?
I think the computer voice makes it hilariously awesome. Although you should see if you can get Sharkey to narrate it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on November 08, 2010, 05:02:34 AM
Finally, someone with the cajones to speak out against without fear of the power Pro-Wasp lobby.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 08, 2010, 05:56:06 AM


It's probably outside of your budget to get a human to read the narration instead of using Microsoft Sam/Mike/Whoever that was, huh?
I think the computer voice makes it hilariously awesome. Although you should see if you can get Sharkey to narrate it.

...!

I think we just discovered Sharkey's new career.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: ObliviousObi on November 08, 2010, 08:35:34 AM
...!

I think we just discovered Sharkey's new career.
Quick, someone lure him in with booze!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on November 08, 2010, 10:43:08 AM
Finally, someone with the cajones to speak out against without fear of the power Pro-Wasp lobby.

The thing with the pro-wasp lobby is, they're not very big, and they don't have a lot of money, but those motherfuckers will sting your shit in the worst places. Like your ear, or on your eyelid.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on November 08, 2010, 12:49:12 PM
Armpit.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on November 08, 2010, 07:23:26 PM
god, kabbage, you need to do more of this stuff, seriously.

Here, pretend we're back at MAGFest, and you're about to Brofist with Constantine while I'm taping it.

Only instead of Constantine, you're Brofisting ---XXXXXXX---REMAINDER OF POST DELETED DUE TO THE TERRIBLE IMPLICATIONS OF WORD CHOICE.  THE AUTHOR APOLOGIZES FOR HIS FAILURE AND PROMISES TO DO BETTER IN THE FUTURE
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on November 09, 2010, 06:32:09 AM
All this brofisting going on... I hope ya'll are wearing gloves.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on November 10, 2010, 06:39:58 AM
Do you know what Reliability-Centered Maintenance is?  Because I'm starting to and I hate it and everybody involved in it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 10, 2010, 07:53:37 AM
I have a distant awareness of it (never worked for anyone who used it and have no direct experience with it). It seemed like a good idea (albeit complicated) when it was described. I thought only highly technical industries were using it?

What kind of trouble is it giving you?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on November 10, 2010, 08:08:28 AM
I'm temping, doing data entry for a company that arranges conferences.  They did a conference for the Society of Maintenance and Reliability Professionals.  I'm transcribing evaluation forms.

"Check shit before it breaks so you can have some idea when it's going to" is a good (albeit blindingly obvious) idea, but these fuckers spun out an entire corporate management philosophy from that.  Based on the seminars offered, the comments given, and a little research, this is coming off as the most inane, bullshit, buzzwordy nonsense since Six Sigma.  Which hey, there are a lot of suggestions that they do a seminar combining the principles of RCM with the principles of Six Sigma, or instruction in Lean RCM, or merging RCM with Lean Six Sigma into some kind of lovecraftian clusterfuck.  There were very highly rated seminars called "Back to the Future: Refocus on the Basics to Achieve Maintenance Excellence" and "Total Process Reliability - A Philosophy For Sustainable Market Leadership" and "Launching Maintenance Communities of Practice for Reliability Excellence".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on November 10, 2010, 09:42:15 AM
I've apparently completely forgotten how to sell myself when going for a job. Which is something I need to relearn fast if I want to stand a chance of getting a job out here, since the town basically shuts down in winter and no one wants to hire.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on November 10, 2010, 12:42:51 PM
Dammit man be POSITIVE

POSITIVE
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on November 10, 2010, 05:24:43 PM
Phone screening on Thursday.  I am so ready to never work in education again.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on November 11, 2010, 08:28:45 AM
Sweet.  Round 1 phone screening done.  Technical exam tomorrow.

Phone Interview for Cerner tomorrow.  Super.

Possible callback from a prestigious international megacorp for a position in Canada where friends inside the company said 'apply and get a passport /now/' is next week.

But you know, no matter what I do, there are still wasps in the world.  And that is like living every day in a race riot where the target is the race of living things that are not other wasps.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on November 11, 2010, 08:21:29 PM
Ughhh my supercrush on Jason Duane just got like 4 times more intense
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on November 11, 2010, 08:33:34 PM
Also this week we're being audited which is weird
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on November 11, 2010, 08:37:50 PM
Get Don (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dD5ghhR02AI#) to work on it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on November 11, 2010, 09:01:38 PM
what the
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Aintaer on November 11, 2010, 10:20:43 PM
Give me some sugar
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on November 12, 2010, 12:37:24 AM
So I am kinda wondering if four actual work days on my real schedule is too early for me to have decided that I actually absolutely loathe this job and don't want to go back ever again.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on November 12, 2010, 02:50:39 AM
My brother once had a job handling packaging at a dog food factory. On his first break of his first day, he literally ran away. From what he told me of the work conditions, I found it was a reasonable response. So four days is a lot, in my book.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on November 12, 2010, 06:19:14 AM
So I am kinda wondering if four actual work days on my real schedule is too early for me to have decided that I actually absolutely loathe this job and don't want to go back ever again.
I lie to myself saying it gets better later until Stockholm sets in.

I will take your mind numbing, shitty job if you really want, though.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on November 12, 2010, 07:17:11 AM
Once my dad got a job at Microsoft so we moved to Washington and then he came home for lunch on the third day, said "I've got to get out of here," and packed up all our stuff and we drove back to Texas.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on November 12, 2010, 07:34:11 AM
I'm curious MCE, what was the fallback plan there once you got to Texas?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on November 12, 2010, 07:43:43 AM
Dig for oil, of course.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on November 12, 2010, 07:50:56 AM
His old job had never wanted him to leave and his boss had made sure he knew he was always welcome if it didn't work out.  The house situation was the hard part since we couldn't back out of the pending sale of our home as easily as he could undo quitting his job.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on November 12, 2010, 06:10:32 PM
Yeah, I quit.  I would rather be jobless for six months than miserable, and thankfully those two things are not kissing cousins for me right now.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on November 12, 2010, 11:09:10 PM
Good luck.

Took me a lot longer than six months to get another job after I quit my last one.  I stand by my decision to quit then (boy do I); I just hope you have an easier time than I did.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on November 13, 2010, 10:02:10 AM
Good luck with that. I've been searching for about two months now trying to avoid that sort of thing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 13, 2010, 10:13:54 AM
I actually realized the other day that for the past eleven years, every single job I was not fired from, I would have been fired from had I not quit/been on on short term contract.

Er. Hm.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on November 13, 2010, 10:45:07 AM
You need to see a career counselor or something.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on November 13, 2010, 10:46:27 AM
Oh, I had security at my last job.  Partly because I was working for a family friend and partly because he was paying me about half what my work was worth.

I don't have any security at my current job; I've been a temp for two years.  But I'm making $1.50 more an hour for an 8-5 warehouse inventory job than I did for a 24-hour on-call netadmin job.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on November 13, 2010, 12:19:39 PM
Every job I have experience for wants a degree, every job that only needs experience I don't have it.
 :done:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on November 13, 2010, 02:50:22 PM
Every employer wants to minimize his risk by hiring a guy who's been doing that job for two years already.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on November 13, 2010, 03:22:55 PM
(Even though they are likely to be bad and inflexible at it)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Dooly on November 13, 2010, 07:20:29 PM
How do you get experience doing jobs that require a degree you don't have?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on November 13, 2010, 09:50:18 PM
Oh, that's easy, you just-
:endit:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 13, 2010, 10:18:03 PM
1. Be persistent.
2. Follow every lead.
3. Don't be afraid to embellish your accomplishments.  It's expected.
4. Don't take job requirements literally.  Employers always overshoot on the off-chance that somebody matching them actually walks in the door.
5. Oftentimes you can get a lower position by applying for a higher one.  The lower position you get is still probably better than the listed one that "matches" your experience.
6. When all else fails, freelance - it looks good on your resume when you get sick of it, which you probably will.

Always remember that an employer can do no worse than reject you.  Even if you do make a complete ass of yourself by applying/interviewing for something you're not even close to qualified for, you'll only end up in exactly the same position you would be in if you had kept sitting around like a spineless schmuck (minus some time which you have plenty of and maybe some gas money).

Pretty much everybody who's graduated or left college since the 60s has had to find a way to break through the same catch-22 scenario.  The fact that there are successes in the world proves that it's certainly possible.  The business world chooses to keep perpetuating the social barrier as a sort of rite of passage into post-educational life.  It sends a clear message: "We could give less of a shit about your actual talents, knowledge, or work ethic.  What we need to know is how much you're willing to prevaricate, kiss ass, and focus on your goals with a bloody-minded intensity, because you're going to find out real quickly that that's the only way to get things done in the real world."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Burrito Al Pastor on November 13, 2010, 10:58:56 PM
So I got a job at the local movie theater (just a part-time thing, nothing fancy) and I started there today.

I may have alienated my co-workers as an ivory-tower intellectual by casually using the phrase "invoking the tetragrammaton".

 :perfect: :;_;:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on November 13, 2010, 11:44:26 PM
ONLY THE WRETCHED REJECT KNOWLEDGE
:advice:
NEVER COMPROMISE FOR THE IGNORANT
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Envy on November 14, 2010, 06:18:53 AM
So I found out when Kroger doesnt have enough hours available to them the people with the lowest seniority get fucked by having no hours that week. Which I was raging about in #FF yesterday. Well I was raging cause Ithought I was the only one who had no hours.. I went to every department to find out about 15 people even though with higher seniority had there hours reduced to 0 for a week.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on November 14, 2010, 07:56:22 AM
Yup, that's retail.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on November 14, 2010, 10:00:35 AM
How do you get experience doing jobs that require a degree you don't have?
Interning and apprenticeships that turned into real jobs but now those guys that hired me way back when no longer work in the field to rehire me now that I'm looking to take the jobs back full time / forever.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on November 14, 2010, 06:40:10 PM
Always remember that an employer can do no worse than reject you.  Even if you do make a complete ass of yourself by applying/interviewing for something you're not even close to qualified for, you'll only end up in exactly the same position you would be in if you had kept sitting around like a spineless schmuck (minus some time which you have plenty of and maybe some gas money).

Plus you shouldn't let that keep you from applying to the jobs anyway.  My current position had mandatory accounting experience, but I went in and told them what I DID have experience in and why I would kick ass at the job even without the accounting classes.  Obviously it won't work every time but you really have to put yourself out there and get told No a lot so you have the opportunity to be told Yes.

It's also employment law that states you have to be reimbursed for gas money to your interview if it's over a reasonable distance but I don't think you'll make a good impression by asking for it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 14, 2010, 07:27:33 PM
Obviously it won't work every time

It's more accurate and helpful to say it won't work most of the time, but that's okay, because you're, again, not out anything if you fail, and you only need to succeed once.  Which leads to:

Quote
but you really have to put yourself out there and get told No a lot so you have the opportunity to be told Yes.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 14, 2010, 07:29:16 PM
To put it more nerdily, getting hired is basically the same as enacting a brute-force login.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Detonator on November 14, 2010, 08:40:35 PM
Obviously it won't work every time but you really have to put yourself out there and get told No a lot so you have the opportunity to be told Yes.

Isn't this copy-pasted from the dating advice thread?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on November 14, 2010, 08:48:30 PM
The principle remains the same. Salesmanship and persistence is key.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on November 14, 2010, 09:03:10 PM
"Salesmanship"=="Lying like there's no tomorrow"
Right?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on November 14, 2010, 09:15:05 PM
Rejection sucks.  Repeated rejection sucks more.

For my money -- and for a great example of just how fucking cynical I am --, looking for a woman resembles nothing so much as looking for a job.  You're going to put a lot of effort into it, and usually you're going to get rejected.  And often for someone you know isn't as good as you.  But what the hell is the alternative?  So you have to get back up and try again, until you get it right.  Which, in the end, may have as much to do with luck as with whether you're the best pick.  Maybe more.

Right now I'm taking a break from both hunts.  But sooner or later I'm going to have to get back on that horse.

Which brings up an interesting point: anyone need a programmer?

(As you know, in the years since writing that I have gotten a mediocre job and a great girl.  But would still like a programming job.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 14, 2010, 09:41:21 PM
There are four developer positions open at my company, and they're getting a bit desperate.  Do you know any Zend Framework?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on November 14, 2010, 09:52:58 PM
I don't actually know what a Zend Framework IS, but I'm a pretty quick learner.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on November 15, 2010, 06:21:29 AM
Obviously it won't work every time but you really have to put yourself out there and get told No a lot so you have the opportunity to be told Yes.

Isn't this copy-pasted from the dating advice thread?
:shrug:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on November 15, 2010, 08:42:08 AM
I'm actually running a little contest to see which I get first: a better job; a new girlfriend; or my culinary degree.

Right now the degree, slated for Spring 2012, is in an uncontested lead.

Last night was the second Sunday in a row that we've been out a cook (no-call no-show last Sunday, last-minute quit yesterday) and so overwhelmed that a manager had to open the backup line and sling pizzas for a few hours during the dinner rush. I helped set up the line and fetch e.g. carryout boxes since hey, when the dining room is full there's not much for the busser to do.

I pointed out at the end of the night that she's worked a line two weeks in a row, some cooks are scheduled for seven shifts next week, and I'm still available for training and promotion.

Roommate, later: "Do you think that'll work?"
Me: "No. But I tried."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 15, 2010, 08:05:12 PM
Looks like I'm moving up again.  No new title, and no new pay grade, but my boss basically wants me to start taking on the other side of what my old lead did and do automation development for the aircraft testers in addition to everything I do now.  It sounds like more work, but since I'm stuck as a 40hr employee either way, it basically means I can divvy up my time more between the development stuff, which is enjoyable, and the rote paperwork and yelling at people, which really isn't.

Also there's now a web tester position open in my team along with the web development mentioned earlier, so seriously, if any of you have relevant experience and can stand living in Orange County, drop me a line.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on November 15, 2010, 09:06:12 PM
Looks like I'm moving up again.

Finally got a piece of the pie?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on November 15, 2010, 09:13:49 PM
Looks like I'm moving up again.

Finally got a piece of the pie?

Hitler Sings The Jeffersons Theme (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J3YRWhg4YaA#)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Doom on November 16, 2010, 07:31:25 AM
I don't think it's been directly stated, just hinted at, but the "easiest" way to get work is to abuse connections.

Which just made me realize the true terror of my work history right now.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on November 16, 2010, 09:16:39 AM
This is the first job I've ever had where I didn't have an "in".

Though you can probably also count the work I did for USGS in the summer of '04, where my "in" was that I'd just finished a capstone project for the same department.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on November 17, 2010, 08:42:06 AM
Picking up suit tonight for interviews Thursday and Friday for some mid-level programming jobs, probably offers in the mid 40s if I'm lucky.

Dad links me to a job within Pratt & Whitney with a pay range between 60k to 112k.  Doing VBA scripting in ACCESS.

Seriously makes me stop and think.  Worst programming tool ever vs. holy-shit-money.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on November 17, 2010, 08:46:59 AM
Something like three times the pay, for programming in a shittier tool?  I'd say go for it.  You can get used to a framework, and it'd be worth it for that kind of paper.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on November 17, 2010, 08:53:52 AM
Yeah, and if you do it for a year and quit, well, if I made $60K in a year I'd have about $30K in my savings account by the end of it.

Anyhow!

My company decided, last year, that it would be a great idea to combine the sick line with the help desk.  Monday, I had to miss work due to a family emergency (everybody's fine; maybe I'll tell the story later).  Sat on hold for several minutes and then got prompted to leave a message.

The "Thad isn't going to be in today" ticket was finally created at 4:30 in the afternoon.

And then they sent me a survey to ask how they did.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on November 17, 2010, 11:16:34 AM
how would you rate your experience with having your body colonized by invading microorganisms on a scale of one to ten, with one being "least satisfaction" and ten being "most satisfaction"
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on November 17, 2010, 12:08:12 PM
I may or may not have mentioned that I got a second job at an office supply store for some extra income. It's kind of sucky and I don't get many hours yet, but a job's a job. Nice to have some disposable income.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on November 17, 2010, 08:41:39 PM
There's no "Someone Else's Job: The Movie" thread so I'm putting it here as it's still relevant to my interests.

My roommate, formerly The Girlfriend, has also had her hours cut and is working for a pittance compared to her actual skill level and work ethic (remember: I went to culinary school so maybe I could learn to cook like she does, and I don't think it's going to work).

But they just fired their executive chef, and have offered her more authority, responsibility, hours, and pay. She already loves working there, so it's pretty much her dream job now.

If any of this pulls through, we might be able to pay our rent and bills on time soon.

Maybe.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 17, 2010, 08:46:00 PM
There's no "Someone Else's Job: The Movie" thread so I'm putting it here as it's still relevant to my interests.

My roommate, formerly The Girlfriend, has also had her hours cut and is working for a pittance compared to her actual skill level and work ethic (remember: I went to culinary school so maybe I could learn to cook like she does, and I don't think it's going to work).

But they just fired their executive chef, and have offered her more authority, responsibility, hours, and pay. She already loves working there, so it's pretty much her dream job now.

If any of this pulls through, we might be able to pay our rent and bills on time soon.

Maybe.

Star Fox - Good Luck! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qHeHTaB9LTg#)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on November 17, 2010, 08:50:46 PM
NEXT WEEK ON 'MY FAIR BRONTO'
R^2 ROOMMATE/ETC LOSES HER RIGHT ARM!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on November 17, 2010, 09:52:59 PM
 :jizz:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on November 17, 2010, 09:56:43 PM
Gross Niku! Didn't you read what R^2 said about her? Roommates are off limits!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on November 18, 2010, 09:29:25 AM
Turned out to be THREE interviews in one.

Round 1: Foreign fellow, was 30 minutes late, could not stop saying he was sorry... to me... the interviewee...  Followed his HR provided list of questions, nodded his head and left.

Round 2, late 20s tech guy, speaks shortly, says our time might be cut short, mutters under his breath.  It would appear he doesn't want to be here.  I keep my answers short and to the point, he seems satisfied and more interested in leaving asap, which I do my best to let him do.

Round 3 late 30s tech veteran, asks questions, wants to hear more on them, personal opinions on some of the situations I discuss, is far more concerned with getting an idea of what my social interactions with others are like than the position requirements.  Very friendly without crossing the lines of getting into personal details/matters.

Asked the HR gal a few questions about the benefits plan and was on my way.  They'll call back early next week with an offer or notice the position was filled.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 18, 2010, 10:13:31 AM
Question for the brontos. A bit of tl;dr first though.

My job search is largely in the doldrums. Most of the jobs available downtown pay less than what I get on unemployment, which just barely covers our household budget (so if I take a cut, I'll actually taking out loans to work). Unemployment coverage is good until like next September-October, not that I'm planning on staying on it that long if I can help it.

There are jobs that pay what I used to make for similar work, but they're all way out in the suburbs (far enough that they're beyond the effective reach of transit). I don't have a problem driving to commute and then moving out to the burbs, but I don't own a car and there's issues with the car part of my license that won't be resolved soon, so I can only commute by motorbike, which is pretty much out from now until the end of march.

I will keep looking, but it looks like I'm probably going to have to wait until spring before I can have a shot at decently-paying job again. Additionally, as I posted earlier, I realized there's issues I've had with job retention that I should be having looked at, so I'm taking some steps to do just that. My treatments for lymphoma also continue three times a week (which scares off the low-rent temp/contract employers anyway). So basically, I'm probably going to tone down the searching during the winter while I focus on getting healthier mentally and physically.

Thing is, I still owe money (lines of credit etc.). It's not much. I have a pretty good credit rating because I make a very strict point of not using much of my available credit (roughly 2.5k owing out of $25k available), but I don't really have enough income to pay it down. I also don't have any money for emergencies (seeing as how all our family and housepets are ill and old, failing to anticipate those costs is foolish). So I'm trying to be prudent and get ahead if I can.

What I'm trying to do is to find some under-the-table work, day labour or the like, so that I can get some extra cash. Legitimate work will actually reduce the overall amount of money I have coming in because unemployment would be reduced by a greater amount, so this needs to be off the books for me to actually get ahead in income. If it's off the books, it won't matter if it's less than minimum wage or has few hours. I don't mind some hard labout and low pay, so long as it's not actually flat-out dangerous work and at the end of the day my balance sheet is up overall. 

I have never worked under the table before and just wondered if anyone has any suggestions on looking for off-the-books work. I asked some friends of mine who've done stuff like that before and they didn't have anything currently. I've been searching Craigslist and the like for stuff like "need help moving, $40 for a day's work" type of posts, but there seems to be no keyword for that sort of stuff and with thousands of job postings daily, there are too many to wade through one-by-one (I've tried). I was going to sign up for some medical studies (my dad's done those a couple times), but they won't accept a dork with lymphoma, obv.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 18, 2010, 02:19:17 PM
I don't know how well it will work out where you are, but when I freelanced I basically neglected to pay taxes on my income until the end of the fiscal year when I had to scrape together one huge lump sum.  It's a hugely dangerous thing to do for obvious reasons, but if you really need to keep your money right now and have some plan to pull a rabbit out of your ass come tax day, well... it's an option, anyway. 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 18, 2010, 03:07:19 PM
Illicit freelancing wouldn't be a bad idea if I had skill that I could freelance with.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on November 18, 2010, 03:26:00 PM
The other nice thing about freelancing, at least in the U.S., is that you get a whole ton of additional tax deductions.  You have to be careful not to get greedy even if you've got justifications for all of it since self-employment carries a much, much higher audit risk and that's a pain in the ass, but you can easily make up for having to pay the half tax that your employer would usually cover.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on November 19, 2010, 08:35:10 PM
I want the job I interviewed for today so bad.  It's slightly lower pay, and it's an hour commute but....

"It's relaxed here"  Guys throwing nerfballs around the cubicle pit.

"We're gonna get a beer run going but nobody has drawn the short straw yet.  Sometimes that happens on Friday."

"Here's the two story tube slide."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on November 20, 2010, 06:28:30 AM
Sounds like something from the days before the dot-com crash.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 20, 2010, 09:29:28 AM
I've come to the conclusion that I would despise working at a place like that.  I drive myself nuts trying to get other people to start working as it is.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on November 20, 2010, 09:36:39 AM
how did it feel when you became the man, brentai
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 20, 2010, 10:08:10 AM
I make sure everybody around me knows that I despise every minute of it, mainly because I get paid less than they do.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on November 20, 2010, 10:35:41 AM
There's no "Someone Else's Job: The Movie" thread so I'm putting it here as it's still relevant to my interests.

The more I think about this, the more annoying it is.

See, we're broke. I think everyone here knows it by now. I've been looking for a new job for two months, with no results. She didn't go look for a job because she likes the one she has -- constantly-cut hours and shitty pay aside, it meant she could more easily stay out all night drinking with her friends.

That's right, we've been late on our rent a couple times, and with stiff late fees, to more readily supply her with beer.

So while I'm out exhausting myself turning in applications day after day, she gets promoted into exactly the job she wants, not only by putting in no effort whatsoever but by making the worst, most irresponsible possible choice.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on November 20, 2010, 12:20:21 PM
The Odd Couple theme song (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kDrfHj3j398#)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: ObliviousObi on November 21, 2010, 10:18:15 PM
There's no "Someone Else's Job: The Movie" thread so I'm putting it here as it's still relevant to my interests.

The more I think about this, the more annoying it is.

See, we're broke. I think everyone here knows it by now. I've been looking for a new job for two months, with no results. She didn't go look for a job because she likes the one she has -- constantly-cut hours and shitty pay aside, it meant she could more easily stay out all night drinking with her friends.

That's right, we've been late on our rent a couple times, and with stiff late fees, to more readily supply her with beer.

So while I'm out exhausting myself turning in applications day after day, she gets promoted into exactly the job she wants, not only by putting in no effort whatsoever but by making the worst, most irresponsible possible choice.
Not to be a dick or anything, but something in me says that she's gotta go. You seem to be working way to hard to end up getting stiffed continually. When it comes to finances, at least in my book, if a roommate is making them unmanageable it is time to find one that won't.

That sentence is terribly written but my brain is about on empty right now.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on November 21, 2010, 11:27:56 PM
She used to be his lady, presumably she was when she was doing this. As, she was right up until about a month or so ago and now she's got best job ever. You can't fault him for keeping her around when they were together, and now you can't fault him for keeping her around now that she can pick up some slack on the rent. If anything, its only an insight as to why they didn't work out as a couple.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on November 22, 2010, 01:24:12 AM
So I got up this morning to run some errands and the car was giving off this awful, cloying smell of burnt rubber and oil. So, I finish what I'm doing, go home, pop my hood and a coolant hose had ruptured, spraying old coolant all over the manifold, my battery, and the roof of my car. It's not just one of the short, simple coolant hoses, it's part of an assembly and I'm not sure if I can remove this particular part of the assembly without re-assembling everything else. I'd been up for about 19 hours at this point, it was sunday, and I figured I wasn't working (as I've only worked one sunday at this place in the last seven weeks, and that was because somebody had an emergency and needed me to fill in for them) so I went to lay down and take a nap. I got up at around 4 PM and called my boss to make sure I wasn't working and to let him know that I had some car problems so he wouldn't call me if he needed anyone to fill in today, and he gets on my shit for it. The convo went something like this;

Him:"Who's repairing your coolant hose?"
Me: "I'm going to try to do it"
Him:"Well, it's only 4 on a sunday, there's plenty of auto parts stores open, there's no reason you shouldn't be repairing it."
Him:"I mean, you tried to call in yesterday, and the day before because you were 'sick', and now you're trying to call in because your 'car is broke', and it sounds to me like you really just don't want to work."
Me: "Yesterday and the day before, I was extremely sick, and I still came into work, so I don't see how that's at all relevant"
Him:"Yeah, well, you should have already got this done and you should be ready to come into work"
Me: "Boss, I just found out about this a couple of hours ago-"
Him:"You were trying to call me at 11 AM"
Me: "...To find out if I was scheduled to work today"
Him:"You always work Sunday, it's part of the weeke-"
Me:"Boss, I have never been scheduled a Sunday since I started working for you."
Him:"Well, you were scheduled today, it was on the schedule, and you shouldn't have had to call me."
Me:"Boss, I was on the schedule one day this week, on a placeholder, from 1PM to 1:15PM. That has not changed. I've had to call you every day this week just to find out if i was scheduled."
Him:"Well, SOMEBODY must have put up the wrong schedule, because you were scheduled to come in today, I don't have time for this, rush is about to start." *hangs up*

This guy can't manage his personnel to begin with - people get sent home hours early, or work hours later than they're scheduled to, half the people on the schedule show up ten-fifteen minutes late some nights, others show up on time and get made to stand around for sometimes HOURS before the boss lets them punch in 'because he needs to save on labor', and for the last five weeks he hasn't bothered to write up a schedule, and when he finally does write up a schedule, HE DOESN'T SCHEDULE FIVE FUCKING PEOPLE (myself included) probably because he literally saved it for the LAST FUCKING MINUTE on Sunday night and was too tired to finish the fucking thing! This is the third week out of the seven I've worked where I've had to call my employer EVERY MORNING just to find out if I was working or not. I'm sleeping in fucking three hour shifts now because I never know if I'm working. He's had me on the schedule six days in a row now, if he really did have me scheduled for today (I'm well convinced he didn't, since he's hurting for labor so bad he wouldn't have scheduled a driver to work six shifts in a row who wasn't a lead driver or AM) and after subsisting on shitty naps all week (while sick with a strep infection, BTW) I ended up going right back to bed after he hung up and sleeping until three in the fucking morning.

It's time to get out of the pizza delivery business, I think.
 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on November 22, 2010, 06:28:30 AM
Frankly, I'm surprised you stuck with it as long as you did after last time.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on November 22, 2010, 01:52:25 PM
As a couple her financial irresponsibility was one of those acceptable flaws you overlook because there are more important things going on. As a roommate her financial irresponsibility :rage:

Both our names are on the lease, and up until now neither of us could afford to live on our own. Now, she's the only one who can, making it all the more likely for me to come home one day and find she's just packed up whatever she can fit in her car and left. I'll need to have found a better job by the time the lease is up (next May) or that shitty broken-down van is going to be where I live.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on November 22, 2010, 04:25:40 PM
And then you should live down by the river.
It won't make life better for you, but at least when you tell people you live in a van down by the river, they'll laugh first until they realize you are joking.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on November 22, 2010, 04:35:26 PM
If she's on the lease and bails, you can probably sue her to get the remainder of her half of the rent money on the lease.

I know she was your lady once and is presumably your friend, but you'd better fucking believe I'd get litigious if somebody tried to fuck me sideways financially like that.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on November 23, 2010, 07:04:22 PM
Got a call today. I have a job! Well, another job.

And I'm not sure how I feel about this one. It's for DaFranco's downtown, a small family run Italian place. They called today, 3 months after I applied and they said I was a sure thing. and it's for a different position. Waiting tables is way better than driving, sure, but still.

Only thing is they are so short staffed right now that I am starting with 4-6 hour shifts, six days a week.  On top of my job at gamestop which starts this week. On top of school. On top of everything else.

Um. But there is openings for dishwashers and everything. And I'm going to try to make my hours NOT so crazy. As it is, I'm looking at roughly 60 hours weeks between just the two jobs.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on November 23, 2010, 07:22:40 PM
If they're looking for a line cook...
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on November 23, 2010, 08:41:33 PM
They are.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on November 23, 2010, 09:21:23 PM
Road trip!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on November 29, 2010, 11:02:02 PM
There's a small chance I'll be working in a full-service fine-dining restaurant this fall. Maybe.

Hey guys, remember this?

Needless to say it didn't happen. The restaurant in question didn't open.

But I talked to the chef and the owner and they're still trying to make it happen and expect the doors to open, and I quote, "January-ish".

From what I am told I am already hired, on the line and apprenticing under said chef.

So that'll be pretty cool.

If it happens.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on December 05, 2010, 09:08:07 PM
Heeeey. So today I worked open to close. I had two tables. One of those tables? My parents. It's been like this all week. The last two nights were "busy" according to the workers. I had one table each night. I spent the rest of the time cleaning. I even ran a few deliveries.

So most of the time I stand there. Just stand there. I've already cleaned the store top to bottom, rolled silverware and everything. Just standing there, sometimes for hours on end.  I looked at my numbers. I work 6-7 days a week. Let's say six. And let's say I work... 5 hours a day. I'm averaging two tables a day. $3 per table. I used to work 4 days a week. 8 hours a day. And got $120 in tips a day. And I actually had things to do.

I might have to quit this job for sheer lack of stuff to do.

Which is fine, it's weird. The owners names are Francesca and Francesco Da Franco. And I can't understand a word HE says and all SHE says is stuff about business she shouldn't be telling me. I'm an employee and she's going on about numbers this and business stuff that. I don't care. I wait on tables. And I've been there a week and the other workers RESENT me. They call me Wonderboy.

I have no idea what the deal is.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on December 05, 2010, 09:15:40 PM
Francesca and Francesco Da Franco

They sound like great people, I don't know what the problem could possibly be.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 05, 2010, 09:53:52 PM
You just like them because they're Frankophones.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on December 06, 2010, 07:21:45 AM
Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on December 06, 2010, 08:54:01 AM
You'd think the "frank" jokes would stop sooner or later, but it looks like they just go furter and furter.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on December 06, 2010, 06:10:49 PM
They've covered wars, ya know.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on December 07, 2010, 01:34:48 AM
i volunteered for a phone bank for KQED, and got paid $100 for it.

then on my way home i fell off my bike and directly on my melon-like head, but fortunately i bought a bike helmet with my $100.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on December 08, 2010, 08:23:02 PM
Looks like I'm gonna be a Comic Store Guy again.  Time to prep the beard.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on December 08, 2010, 09:14:11 PM
I can think of worse gigs.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on December 10, 2010, 03:13:05 PM
So I got up this morning to run some errands and the car was giving off this awful, cloying smell of burnt rubber and oil. So, I finish what I'm doing, go home, pop my hood and a coolant hose had ruptured, spraying old coolant all over the manifold, my battery, and the roof of my car. It's not just one of the short, simple coolant hoses, it's part of an assembly and I'm not sure if I can remove this particular part of the assembly without re-assembling everything else. I'd been up for about 19 hours at this point, it was sunday, and I figured I wasn't working (as I've only worked one sunday at this place in the last seven weeks, and that was because somebody had an emergency and needed me to fill in for them) so I went to lay down and take a nap. I got up at around 4 PM and called my boss to make sure I wasn't working and to let him know that I had some car problems so he wouldn't call me if he needed anyone to fill in today, and he gets on my shit for it. The convo went something like this;

Him:"Who's repairing your coolant hose?"
Me: "I'm going to try to do it"
Him:"Well, it's only 4 on a sunday, there's plenty of auto parts stores open, there's no reason you shouldn't be repairing it."
Him:"I mean, you tried to call in yesterday, and the day before because you were 'sick', and now you're trying to call in because your 'car is broke', and it sounds to me like you really just don't want to work."
Me: "Yesterday and the day before, I was extremely sick, and I still came into work, so I don't see how that's at all relevant"
Him:"Yeah, well, you should have already got this done and you should be ready to come into work"
Me: "Boss, I just found out about this a couple of hours ago-"
Him:"You were trying to call me at 11 AM"
Me: "...To find out if I was scheduled to work today"
Him:"You always work Sunday, it's part of the weeke-"
Me:"Boss, I have never been scheduled a Sunday since I started working for you."
Him:"Well, you were scheduled today, it was on the schedule, and you shouldn't have had to call me."
Me:"Boss, I was on the schedule one day this week, on a placeholder, from 1PM to 1:15PM. That has not changed. I've had to call you every day this week just to find out if i was scheduled."
Him:"Well, SOMEBODY must have put up the wrong schedule, because you were scheduled to come in today, I don't have time for this, rush is about to start." *hangs up*

This guy can't manage his personnel to begin with - people get sent home hours early, or work hours later than they're scheduled to, half the people on the schedule show up ten-fifteen minutes late some nights, others show up on time and get made to stand around for sometimes HOURS before the boss lets them punch in 'because he needs to save on labor', and for the last five weeks he hasn't bothered to write up a schedule, and when he finally does write up a schedule, HE DOESN'T SCHEDULE FIVE FUCKING PEOPLE (myself included) probably because he literally saved it for the LAST FUCKING MINUTE on Sunday night and was too tired to finish the fucking thing! This is the third week out of the seven I've worked where I've had to call my employer EVERY MORNING just to find out if I was working or not. I'm sleeping in fucking three hour shifts now because I never know if I'm working. He's had me on the schedule six days in a row now, if he really did have me scheduled for today (I'm well convinced he didn't, since he's hurting for labor so bad he wouldn't have scheduled a driver to work six shifts in a row who wasn't a lead driver or AM) and after subsisting on shitty naps all week (while sick with a strep infection, BTW) I ended up going right back to bed after he hung up and sleeping until three in the fucking morning.

It's time to get out of the pizza delivery business, I think.
 

So an update to this saga

I ended up calling around trying to find a part for my car, only to find out that the only place to get it is the dealership, and it's part of a thermostat assembly and will run me 200 bucks. That's not including labor, and given that I'd have to remove the entire throttle body assembly and possibly the carbuerator to get this fucking hose off, I suspect I would have ended up having to bring it into a mechanic. I called the boss and told him the situation, he tried to bully me into going to a junkyard asap (even though I told him I wasn't sure I could do the repair and KNEW I didn't have the money, as my bank account was negative and my wife's was <20 dollars) and I kind of just blew him off for a week while I waited to get money and tried to figure out a workaround

The workaround was to take a brass barbed fitting from the local ace hardware (3.50 cent part) and basically splicing the hose that was ruptured with it. All told the actual repair cost less than 5 dollars and took less than a half an hour to complete. But as I panicked and scrambled and worried about what I was going to do with my finances this month, how long it would take to get current with my shitty minimum wage, etc, I realized that this job isn't fucking worth it anymore and the extra 20 hours of free time I have a week are coming at too steep of a cost. So I took some time to put my resume out, and by the time we'd finally gotten the car fixed, I got a call from Siwell consulting, a company who apparently does Verizon's internal IT helpdesk, and got the job a couple of days later.

Pay's great, but the position is currently temporary - some extra help since apparently they decided to do a mass Lotus -> Outlook migration at the busiest time of year for the company. The trainer and manager of the dept. are both pretty confident my class will get made permanent long before the temporary period ends, though, and even if we don't, I'll have plenty of time to save money between now and february to get me started on my plans for the future, so all in all pretty great times.

It was also a huge relief to call my asshole manager at Papa Johns and tell him I was seeking employment opportunities elsewhere.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on December 10, 2010, 06:51:41 PM
If one more person tells me that the Thanksgiving/Christmas season is the best time of the year to get a kitchen job because lots of places are hiring seasonal work, I will probably tell them outright to choke on their filthy lies.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on December 11, 2010, 03:09:13 AM
Fuckdicks.
I took this job for a 15-20 hour a week job. I'm already working 6+ hour shifts every day when today, Jill quit. Now Jill was the only person who worked there that was under 35. She's my age and was also an art student. So it we actually talked and had intelligent conversations. Something that's never really happened at a job before. It was 6:15, we had a full house, a table of 20 just walked in and I had to figure out how to make tables out of thin air because literally every table was full, and Jill slides up to the cash register with her coat on and starts closing out.
"I quit Mitch. Good luck." Then she walked away.
Well, my hours do go up (they can't. I literally work open to close every day.) But now I am the only waiter. Period.
And to make it better, I'm in charge of hiring new people.
Stipulations: Has to be a girl, has to be somewhat attractive, friendly, and between 21-30.  I currently have no one around who fits this description. I can't get a single day off until I find not just one, but at least two. Because one will mean I can have backup on a busy weekend. Two means one can work during the week too.

And the new cook they hired? Apparently super racist. And doesn't like Italians. Sooooooo he's going to be going bye-bye soon.


And to put the icing on the cake, the boss's daughters are fighting over me. They are 7 and 13. The 13 year old is being... quite vulgar and sexual. It is really making me uncomfortable.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on December 11, 2010, 03:17:56 AM
Are you sure you aren't a manga protagonist?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on December 11, 2010, 09:22:19 AM
Would be nice if you also knew the nature of Jill's quitting and her phone number. For entirely unrelated reasons of course.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on December 11, 2010, 07:21:17 PM
aaaaaaaaaaaaaargh why can't I be good at both jobs at once

Seriously, I sell tons of stuff a the video store, but only when I can't sell anything at the office supply store and vice-versa.

Oh also I worked an opening shift door-crasher sale and a busy Saturday night in the same day with less than an hour between them. I like having two jobs, but these types of days will one day kill me.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on December 11, 2010, 07:58:27 PM
Would be nice if you also knew the nature of Jill's quitting and her phone number. For entirely unrelated reasons of course.

I already know why age quit in detail and why the boss wanted her gone. In detail. I'm the guy everyone talks too.
And Jill isn't my kind of lady to try to get a number from. She is... not a fan of other races. She's the type that'll say horrible things followed by "but I'm not a racist."

Today my boss decided she wasnt going to hire more people. If I wanted help on a Friday or something, I can bring people in to help. This is retarded. I'm going to either have her hire people so I get a day off ever or I'm going to have to quit.

To top it off, I had terrible chest pains today to the point I dropped stuff and fell into the wall. If there were other workers I'd have left.

I hate my job because I am there too much.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on December 11, 2010, 08:01:10 PM
Oh. And to "cheer me up" the thirteen year old decided she should "dance on me." Then wanted to show me her new underwear she just bought at the mall.

This is getting to comedian levels of me having to run from a little girl.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 11, 2010, 09:18:54 PM
Better to run from a little girl then wind up on a Sex Offender registry.

Also, girls who behave like that have often been found to been sexually abused. The correlation isn't 100% by any means, but you should certainly continue to put as much distance and as many walls between you and her as possible. Because if she decides she doesn't like you any more, things could get REAL ugly.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Detonator on December 11, 2010, 10:34:56 PM
Lottel the problem here is that you live in Japan.  Cut it out.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on December 12, 2010, 01:03:04 PM
So I'm overdue on my 90-day review by about a month and I've been asking my direct boss about it for probably three weeks or so. I figured it would happen this past week, as it was the annual staff summit and board meeting, so the Prez was in town and he's the dude that does all the hiring and firing and whatnot since we are a tiny organization. I gave my direct boss ample time to bring this up with the Prez, but he apparently failed to do so at all. It got to the point where at the end of the week, I emailed him twice about it and got no response, and at 4:30pm on Friday asked him whether I was going to get my review while the Prez was still in town or not, and if not, when? He said he hadn't talked to him about it and that it probably wouldn't happen, since "these things tend to take place over the phone". The Prez was sitting in his office literally ten feet away on the other side of the wall from my office and for some reason he thought it was a horrible idea to bother him with such trivial botherings.

I told my boss I'd ask the Prez about it and ended up waiting around 1 1/2 hours until he was finally free, but got ten minutes of his time and brought it up with him. He was very nice about it and said he would have to talk to my boss (who had left by this point) about my performance to see where things stood, as he works remotely and I don't have a ton of direct interaction with the Prez on a daily basis, but said he didn't know of any "red flags" and was overall pleased with the work he had seen, and that they'd discuss it next week. He asked when my review was due and I replied that it was a month overdue, to which he said "well, it's your career, so you need to take more initiative about things like this".  :facepalm:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on December 12, 2010, 01:24:25 PM
See, here is when you DOCUMENT that shit.  Meticulously document when you were asking about your review, with witnesses, if possible.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 12, 2010, 09:39:05 PM
Well, he should have those emails as a record at least.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on December 13, 2010, 07:35:48 PM
Yeah, I have email copies, but I doubt it'll come to that. He took my word for it, knowing that my direct boss is fairly hands off when it comes to management. They are hanging out in Chicago tonight and tomorrow, so I'll hopefully hear back something before the end of the week. It'd especially be super awesome to get on salary before the holidays, so that I'm on paid vacation, rather than being temporarily unemployed for a week and a half.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on December 13, 2010, 08:09:44 PM
Spaco I think you're over reacting about the intent of his comment. When my bosses boss tells me he wants to see me take more initiative in my carrier, to me, it means that he wants me to cut out the middle man, if I have to. He's telling you that if you take control and go over your bosses head about things like this, and perhaps other things, you might be on quicker track to move up. Presumably you're a good worker, I think he's just telling you how you can get promoted quicker, if you take the initiative to perhaps not take 'we'll do it later' as an answer.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on December 13, 2010, 10:45:56 PM
Depends on the context.  If it was said where I worked it would be intended to literally mean "You should be doing your manager's work."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on December 13, 2010, 11:52:19 PM
i.e., Just do work you weren't hired to do and aren't paid to do, with no expectation of reward or recognition.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on December 14, 2010, 09:32:16 AM
Welp, out of a job come New Year's.

On the plus side, they fought for us.  Like, my boss's boss's boss is getting reassigned for bawling out HIS bosses over it.

I don't suppose that matters from a utilitarian perspective, but fuck utilitarianism; the fact that the people who work under the same roof I do appreciate the work I do and were willing to fight on my behalf means a hell of a lot more to me than this insulting position or mediocre paycheck ever did.

I did my job, I did it well, and the people in this building know it.  Sucks that a bunch of bean counters who I've never met don't appreciate it, but that's corporate America for you.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on December 14, 2010, 11:19:58 AM
Oh no.  Thad is going to be one of those 99er guys and start sponging off the government and be a waste of taxpayer money and will become lazy and dependent on the government etc etc etc strawman conservative snarking


IN all seriousness, that sucks, Thad.  It always hurts to lose a job, even if the job blows.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on December 14, 2010, 12:58:09 PM
Blah blah crisis opportunity etc.

(Incidentally, when I said that to my girlfriend at lunch, she correctly responded with "Crisitunity," which I do believe is her first successful completion of a Simpsons reference.  It made me smile.)

I do my best and most fulfilling work when I'm unemployed (or part-time) anyway.  In-between shooting out resumes and filing for unemployment I should have plenty of time to write some code.

And my agency can start trying to find me better work anyway, which they couldn't do as long as I was under contract to one of their employees.  And the fact that I spent two years in a job I was overqualified for shows my commitment -- and will hopefully make them more likely to get me a better job than try to slough another crap job off on me.  (The optimistic way of looking at it is that if I make more money, they make more money, so presumably they'll want to put me in the highest-paying gig they can.)

Meantime, a glance at unemployment suggests that I won't make enough to cover health insurance plus rent.  Well, at least I've got my savings and my freelancing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 14, 2010, 01:06:07 PM
I hear you on the being satisfied that people were satisfied with you front. In retrospect, I realized that part of the reason I think I started playing chicken with my manager so much at the last place was to see just who would really stick up for me there if it came down to it.

Now that's a stupid way to go about things and it was only a minor part of the overall situation, but I know I'm one of those people who like to actually be appreciated if I'm working hard and doing things right (as we all do, really).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Envy on December 16, 2010, 05:13:05 AM
Never join the union of United Food and Commercial Workers international. All they do is absolutely rape your paychecks so nothing is left. this is the third week in the row where my check is literally nothing useable.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on December 16, 2010, 04:56:20 PM
Looks like I'm gonna be a Comic Store Guy again.  Time to prep the beard.

So it was written, so it shall be.  Not quite full-time to start, but the shifting personnel that has me getting the job in the first place will probably see me at full time within the first few months if not sooner.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on December 16, 2010, 06:20:50 PM
So I've been working at the office supply store for four months now, and...

I hate it. I mean absolutely hate it. I had a hard time adjusting to the video store too, but this is ridiculous. The other staff that I work with seem to absolutely detest me for no discernible reason, the pay is lousy, the shifts are long and tedious yet few and far between, the closest place for lunch is way too pricey, and after four months I still haven't received any training whatsoever. I don't even like the store. I wouldn't shop there. I've only ever had one job before, but I'm pretty sure it's bad when I stay up late because I dread working in the morning.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on December 16, 2010, 06:24:59 PM
Nah that's normal.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on December 16, 2010, 11:32:48 PM
Everything you've described seems normal.

Is there anything about the job (other than the paycheck) that makes you happy? That might be cause for some alarm. It would be good if you pretended to like it though.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on December 16, 2010, 11:57:15 PM
So tonight was another awful night but I got a story out of it. We were dead until 6:30 when several tables showed up at once and sat down. They didn't wait to be seated like the sign so politely asked, every table walked in and sat down. I was unaware and was cleaning in the back. I went to go check the door after a few minutes of cleaning and there they all were. So I got everyone menus when these two 12 year old walk in.
I knew right away I'd be posting here tonight when one girl turns to the other "Hey. so, do you think we can get him to get us beer?" The rest of the 12 of them walked in and sat down and they were the TRASHIEST people. And this is a pretty nice joint I work at. But fine. I can deal with trashy, it doesn't bother me until they start cursing and throwing racial slurs about. This is also the night when half of the church nearby comes out. And I was so busy running back and forth getting drinks and starter salads and everything for my other tables that I could barely make it over to them each time to tell them they have to keep it down. Everytime I /did/ however, they proceeded to shove a glass in my face and then keep talking. I had no idea what they drank and it got to the point where after the 7th cup jammed into my chest (If I wasn't concave this glass would've broken my sternum) I said "Listen, I'm going to fill it with whatever I find back there unless you tell me what you had." They all switched seats several times and the girls were exchanging shirts so I couldn't tell who was where was what.
And if it seemed like I was losing my patience, I was. I had 6 or so other tables of very nice, polite people and these people were literally cursing at me and fighting me every step of the way. I'd ask if they wanted a refill since I was walking back and and one would say yes. I'd go get them a refill and come back and one more would say yes. And giggle. And to order? Jesus christ. Took me literally 10 minutes to get their order. They knew what they wanted. They were just being total dicks about it.
After a while another 12 year old girl walked in. She was easily 200. She was also the nicest of the bunch, which was sad because the moment she sat down the others started saying "Hey fatty, what do you want to drink?" And it was obvious she didn't like it. Even the mother called her fat. And this wasn't her kid.
And that started the biggest problem. I paid extra attention to this girl because everyone else was so mean. The other girls didn't like that (they were trying to flirt earlier and I ignored them.) I asked her "And can I get you anything else?" and one of the girls swings her hand around and says "I want this. Now." And grabs my dick and squeezes. Hard. Painfully hard. And she wouldn't let go. I had to forcibly remove her hand from my crotch while her mom just laughed. I walked to my boss and told her to talk to her. She took one look "Just get rid of them. She used to work here. You replaced her."
I was cleaning up all the shredded napkins and doodles of dicks they drew on the tables when my boss walked by and told me about her. She was fired because she was a prostitute before she started working there. And she went back to her old tricks. Literally.

It was quite possibly the worst table experience I've had in my six years as a waiter. Jesus christ.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on December 17, 2010, 01:46:05 AM
I find myself laughing every time you post. And not he good this is funny laugh, the bad, this is so uncomfortable laugh. :D
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on December 17, 2010, 07:30:37 AM
Guys, we should make a movie of this shit.

I'm going to have a lot of free time pretty soon.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on December 17, 2010, 09:13:36 AM
I'm not gonna pretend I know anything about anything, but once someone tries to crush your junk, isn't it time to get Johnny Law involved?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on December 17, 2010, 10:40:15 AM
Would you like to give these people a reason to stay around longer?
They did it about ten minutes before they left and I stopped waiting on them right after. I just did not want them there any more. Boss said that if I didn't want to wait on them, they aren't welcome in the store. So in a few months when they come back in again I doubt I'll let them in. I'll deal with it then if it ever actually comes up
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on December 17, 2010, 10:45:02 AM
Well, personally I'd do it just for the retribution, because I like to think that society has (at least nominally) mechanics to put that brand of asshole in their place, but I think I can understand if you only wanted to put the incident behind you.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on December 17, 2010, 01:01:54 PM
I put up with my share of bullshit as a female waitress in an area prone to hicks.

I hated kids more. Far, far more. For one, you can deck hicks who are grabbing your ass and tits and you won't get in trouble.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on December 19, 2010, 08:28:20 PM
Here's a work post that doesn't involve my genitals or being asked to take money in exchange for sexual favors!

The civic center contacted my boss the other day and they are working out a deal. To do this, she needs to send a person to run a stand on Friday nights. Only person she trusts is me. I am going to get a promotion and a pay raise. Of course, I need to get certified, so she is going to pay for me to take classes.

And to top it off, guess who is in charge of hiring? Well, ok. I'm in charge of FINDING people. She still has the final say but if I trust them and I like them, chances are they will get hired.

Which means I am hunting down my friends with cooking experience and waiting experience. I've got a couple in mind.


It is very strange to post something here where some sort of strange mishap hasn't happened.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on December 19, 2010, 08:55:01 PM
Are you sure it's not a prostitution stand?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 19, 2010, 09:40:28 PM
They will provide "refreshment".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lady Duke on December 20, 2010, 05:14:19 PM
Over the summer, a couple came into our jewelry store, asking if we'd seen or bought a sapphire ring that was this girl's engagement ring.  They were seriously they cutest couple, this girl and her lady, like the cutest couple, and I felt sooooo badly for them.  I told them I'd keep a look out for it and they left us a flier at the store with their number and address, with something about a reward I guess (I don't recall that last part really, but I digress).  Long story short, these two girls were up here to get married because it's illegal in their home state of Alabama or whatever the hell, and they really like New Hampshire, so that's why they were up here.  They were out for the day and lost one of the engagement rings, and I can't even imagine how upset they were, being like a week away from their wedding and all.  The ring never showed up, and never showed up, but when they were at the store, I told them we had a ring just like it, only with a different stone, and if they needed to re-order, I'd give them a super deal because how can you not feel terrible for someone in that situation?

December rolls around, and one of the girls calls the store asking if we'd ever seen the ring and how much would it cost to replace.  I called our big jewelry supplier, the one that has the same setting they had on their ring, and I called them back with a quote.  What they wanted was now something like $600-$700, whereas when they bought it it'd been $300.  So she really couldn't consider it at the moment.  I felt bad for her, but I really gave her the absolute lowest markup that we could without my dad throwing up all over the floor about it, and even then it just was far out of their budget.

Today, I went to the bank to deposit a check, and I came back and there was their fucking ring sitting on the shelf where we keep the scrap jewelry we buy every day.  I'm still fucking floored by it, because some stupid schmuck found it and came to sell it for scrap for fucking $50 and they probably found it the same day those girls lost it and holy fuck, I'm glad I wasn't in the store because I would have punched the drunk asshole who brought it in straight in the mouth.  Seriously, the guy is literally an alcoholic who smells of booze.  Anyway, I called the police about it to try to get the couple's info so I could send it home to them, and they're so disorganized who knows how long they would have taken, and the scrap I'd written their number on was long gone, but I did manage to find one completely unfamiliar number in my cell phone.  So I call it at work and get no answer.  Maybe I'm wrong, I think.  I googled the area code and it says it's Alabama, so I called it around an hour ago, and a girl picks up and I clumsily explain I'm a girl at a jewelry store who found a ring and I hope I have the right number.  That girl goes sooooooooooooooo crazy on the other line, and is so overjoyed with the whole thing she can barely contain her joy over the phone, and I hear her talking to friends she's with wherever she is, so long story long, I'm shipping it home to them, and they're sending us a check for $50 because that's the least they could do as far as they're concerned. 

Best christmas story ever :D
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on December 20, 2010, 05:30:47 PM
Awww, that's awesome!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on December 20, 2010, 05:46:38 PM
I am a bit unhappy it did not involve terrible violence though.
Oh well, nothing's perfect.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on December 20, 2010, 06:06:44 PM
As I turn to go out the door this evening, my office manager says to me, "Oh, be careful to not slip on the banana peel in the middle of the floor.  I've decided it should stay there until someone slips on it."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 20, 2010, 07:21:24 PM
Over the summer, a couple came into our jewelry store, asking if we'd seen or bought a sapphire ring that was this girl's engagement ring.  They were seriously they cutest couple, this girl and her lady, like the cutest couple, and I felt sooooo badly for them.  I told them I'd keep a look out for it and they left us a flier at the store with their number and address, with something about a reward I guess (I don't recall that last part really, but I digress).  Long story short, these two girls were up here to get married because it's illegal in their home state of Alabama or whatever the hell, and they really like New Hampshire, so that's why they were up here.  They were out for the day and lost one of the engagement rings, and I can't even imagine how upset they were, being like a week away from their wedding and all.  The ring never showed up, and never showed up, but when they were at the store, I told them we had a ring just like it, only with a different stone, and if they needed to re-order, I'd give them a super deal because how can you not feel terrible for someone in that situation?

December rolls around, and one of the girls calls the store asking if we'd ever seen the ring and how much would it cost to replace.  I called our big jewelry supplier, the one that has the same setting they had on their ring, and I called them back with a quote.  What they wanted was now something like $600-$700, whereas when they bought it it'd been $300.  So she really couldn't consider it at the moment.  I felt bad for her, but I really gave her the absolute lowest markup that we could without my dad throwing up all over the floor about it, and even then it just was far out of their budget.

Today, I went to the bank to deposit a check, and I came back and there was their fucking ring sitting on the shelf where we keep the scrap jewelry we buy every day.  I'm still fucking floored by it, because some stupid schmuck found it and came to sell it for scrap for fucking $50 and they probably found it the same day those girls lost it and holy fuck, I'm glad I wasn't in the store because I would have punched the drunk asshole who brought it in straight in the mouth.  Seriously, the guy is literally an alcoholic who smells of booze.  Anyway, I called the police about it to try to get the couple's info so I could send it home to them, and they're so disorganized who knows how long they would have taken, and the scrap I'd written their number on was long gone, but I did manage to find one completely unfamiliar number in my cell phone.  So I call it at work and get no answer.  Maybe I'm wrong, I think.  I googled the area code and it says it's Alabama, so I called it around an hour ago, and a girl picks up and I clumsily explain I'm a girl at a jewelry store who found a ring and I hope I have the right number.  That girl goes sooooooooooooooo crazy on the other line, and is so overjoyed with the whole thing she can barely contain her joy over the phone, and I hear her talking to friends she's with wherever she is, so long story long, I'm shipping it home to them, and they're sending us a check for $50 because that's the least they could do as far as they're concerned. 

Best christmas story ever :D

That doesn't belong here, that belongs in the DAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW thread. :luv: :luv: :luv:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on December 20, 2010, 07:34:50 PM
That setup can work as a scam. Someone tells you they're missing their ring, which they say is of great sentimental value. A second guy hands in the ring, and you buy it. You never see the first guy again, or you feel compelled to send it for free, or they offer to pay but you never see payment.

Doesn't sound likely to be a scam in this case, though. $50 split three ways is hardly worth anyone's time.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on December 20, 2010, 07:46:42 PM
Especially 6 months worth of time.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on December 20, 2010, 07:59:58 PM
Best christmas story ever :D

(http://i322.photobucket.com/albums/nn438/GirlFromTheBush/icons/HappyTears.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on December 21, 2010, 09:04:20 AM
At this point it seems positions I apply for don't even bother responding now.  Running out of places to try locally.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on December 21, 2010, 12:07:30 PM
Can you cook? Do you look good in a skirt?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on December 21, 2010, 02:37:56 PM
I can and I do  :gay4:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on December 21, 2010, 05:14:09 PM
I was aiming for MadMax there, but if you want to move and cook/wait on tables...

Those are her rules for new hires. They either have to cook or look good in a skirt.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on December 21, 2010, 07:27:43 PM
How short are we talking here?

I'll give you two inches above the knee. Past that, it's gonna cost you.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on December 21, 2010, 09:44:59 PM
How m

I mean, ha!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on December 21, 2010, 10:25:10 PM
Doesn't matter!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on December 23, 2010, 05:19:42 PM
Nothing says classy like getting laid off three days before Christmas.

(http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_RIM2MAMg-DQ/TQxhDaEw3dI/AAAAAAAABAk/ZaKXwrZeaS4/s1600/tumblr_ku8rcp2KFE1qzy9z2o1_500.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on December 23, 2010, 05:53:55 PM
Wow, that's just unbelievable. That is just. I don't even know what to say.

Jesus fucking christ, dude. Who the hell do you work for, Scrooge?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 23, 2010, 09:28:39 PM
First Thad, now this. Jesus Goddamn. Yeah, what company do you work for - so I can avoid buying anything from them should the opportunity ever come up.

In other job-related news, I might luck into a decent new job (almost my old rate of pay) as a fraud investigator, really close to where I live. Just gotta play my cards right. The only downside is it'll be going back to the telecom sector, but that's not exactly the end of the world.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on December 24, 2010, 06:23:21 AM
I thought Spaco worked for the Census Bureau.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on December 24, 2010, 07:11:29 AM
Well, I did work for the Census earlier this year, but that of course was only a temporary job. Earlier in May or so I got a research assistantship position at a tiny think tank that does economic policy research and it was really cool. I was planning on staying there for at least two years, but oh well. I at least got some decent experience in nonprofit and got some co-authorship positions on a few published reports, so I now have something to start a CV with. I've got a ton of contacts here now, so I should be able to find something a lot easier than when I moved here and didn't know anyone. I still work part-time at a climbing gym, so I'll pick up some more hours there in the interim to pay rent and stuff.

I'm telling people the upside to the timing of the whole thing is that drinking a lot during the holidays is encouraged.  :attn:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on December 24, 2010, 12:34:53 PM
It's the start of a new year; it's new budget time.  Big time for layoffs but also for hiring.

Doesn't make me any goddamn happier about it, of course.

Or my boss.  He called in sick the day after he told us.  I imagine that after having to tell two guys they were laid off right before Christmas, he went home and got wasted.

Sucks all around.  Condolences, Spaco.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on December 27, 2010, 09:02:56 AM
I worked for six hours and forty-four minutes this week.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on December 27, 2010, 09:07:37 AM
I had the bright idea of coming in early this morning to rack up an extra hour or so for my last paycheck.

Nobody else had the bright idea of coming in early, so I had to wait half an hour for anyone to show up and let me in.

It's all good, though; I went for a walk and read a Conan comic.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 29, 2010, 10:14:33 AM
I went to another interview with a low chance of success (contract proposal writer for some postal firm). The woman interviewing me struck me as an odd cross between a bundle of dried sticks that've been buried under the snow and a ghoul with impeccably coiffed hair (that hair will never move, I assure you that).

Anyway, during the interview, the usual meaningless question of "what would your ideal job be?" came up and I gabbled the usual nonsense of a man with no idea of he really would like to do. Only later, after leaving, for the third time in my life I actually realized what I'd really be genuinely good at.

The realization that he would probably make a very good priest only can only leave a totally non-religious man with a sense of profound depression and utter uselessness.

I guess it's not the first time that's happened though.

Twice before, the answer to the "What would you really like to do?" question has come to me, and each time it was a similar wash. When I was much younger, I thought I would have liked to become a cop. One of those cops posted to a small town way way way to the north, where there are only two or four (or even one) cops for the whole town or region. But the police service is no place for a short, nerdly fellow, who rarely commands respect on sight. The second time it happened, I realized skills and temperament were perfect for a an explorer's job. Sadly, while this was an important occupation for most of the last several thousand years, there haven't exactly been many openings since December 14th 1911.

Oh well, I'm not dead yet. There's still time for my brain to present me with a useful idea at some point instead of taunting me. In the meantime I will chase the bad office jobs that pay better than my other non-options and wallow in my continued stupidity.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on December 29, 2010, 11:21:42 AM
The realization that he would probably make a very good priest only can only leave a totally non-religious man with a sense of profound depression and utter uselessness.

yep
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on December 29, 2010, 11:32:47 AM
Not believing in god is no impediment to making money hand over fist in his name.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on December 29, 2010, 11:46:51 AM
I came to the realisation not long ago, that my ideal job right now... is a waiter. I get to work with people and food, and my charm (what passes as it) and my lame jokes means I get good tips. And don't get me started know the weird stories I get.
I just lucked out and got such a job. And am good enough at it I constantly get told I'm the perfect waiter. Unfortunately, I am under no illusion that I can do it for too much longer and will have to grow up sooner or later.


Any, mongrel, I know its not a  career really but I think you could sell some custom terrain for some supplemental income. I've seen quite a bit and the detail you get is fantastic. Might be able to auction off your talent.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on December 29, 2010, 11:47:09 AM
Truth is there's an awful lot I'd be happy doing -- writing, acting, many of the different facets of game development, research...

I intend to do at least some of these things once I'm unemployed.  Ideally I'll be able to produce some work which will get the right people's attention and give me a shot at doing the shit I like to do and getting paid for it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 29, 2010, 11:57:55 AM
A couple of people suggested the terrain thing, but my problem is production. It takes me so long to get anything done, there's no way I'd ever make money at it. This was a problem with all my artwork, not just terrain - for me to create anything of even half-way tolerable quality takes for-fuckin'-ever. And when I look at professional work done by someone who really does it for a living, it's alway several orders of magnitude better.

Since I started building my own terrain, I've become pretty familiar with people who do make it for a living and most of them have really good moulding skills and other mass-production techniques that allow them to create in quantity enough to generate an actual income.

Anyway, I already wasted ten years of my life fooling myself I'd do art for a living when I've never enjoyed producing things to someone else's specifications anyway. That ship didn't sail, it burned to the waterline at the pier.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on December 29, 2010, 12:08:56 PM
I know most people aren't looking for tips on how to lose jobs these days, but as a manager, let me tell you, crashing another employee's Christmas party while high on cocaine (Casey Jones you better watch your speed) and starting a fight is an excellent way to terminate your employment.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on December 29, 2010, 12:21:51 PM
YES details
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on December 29, 2010, 12:28:03 PM
I know most people aren't looking for tips on how to lose jobs these days, but as a manager, let me tell you, crashing another employee's Christmas party while high on cocaine (Casey Jones you better watch your speed) and starting a fight is an excellent way to terminate your employment.

That would have probably been much more satisfying than simply coming to work and doing my job every day until I got laid off.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on December 29, 2010, 01:08:04 PM
I am trying to imagine what you would be like raging on cocaine, Thad
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on December 29, 2010, 01:34:46 PM
I imagine it'd be like that one Gargoyles episode where the nanogoo went ballistic and started recompiling the world into a perfect sterile form until it was finally talked down by a large bat and decided to fuck/merge with a burly Australian furfag.

Anyway I can say with some authority that one can have the perfect skillset for one's job and still hate every second of it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on December 29, 2010, 01:38:30 PM
th-

thad is the furlust nanotech gell in this analogy I am to understand of course?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on December 29, 2010, 02:18:00 PM
Thad is the all-devouring logicbeast that requires a massive hit of peyote to be able to talk to, yes.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on December 29, 2010, 04:06:35 PM
Maaaan...

Young native Americans all going out into the wilderness to go on a vision quest


All discovering that Thad is their spirit animal.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on December 29, 2010, 07:09:41 PM
The realization that he would probably make a very good priest only can only leave a totally non-religious man with a sense of profound depression and utter uselessness.

I've thought about it, that or monkhood, and I'm actually Christian so that's not a problem, but around here the only remotely viable option in either regard is the Catholic Church and I don't think I could ever convince myself to take a vow of celibacy. (So far it wouldn't have made much of a difference, but hey, I don't know the future.)

It's their loss, though. There are so few people joining the orders these days that if I were to do so I honestly think I'd have a decent shot at making at least archbishop.

Then again, archbishop sounds like the coolest job title (come on, it's got "arch" in it!) but what good is that when it can't get you the ladies?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on December 29, 2010, 08:49:08 PM
Biked to work yesterday, something I've been meaning to do since I moved last year but never got around to (first because of my asthma, then because of the summer heat, and for the past few months because my girlfriend's only been working evenings so if I drive to work I can come home and eat lunch with her).  It was nice, and at least I can say I did it -- it was my last chance to do it without having to bike in a rainstorm.

Tomorrow's my last day.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on December 30, 2010, 12:36:21 PM
Um. Quick question. Do you guys tip your waiters for buffet? I'm getting 40% tips on every table and that strikes ME as odd.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on December 30, 2010, 12:41:00 PM
You still gotta refill the drinks and get stuff, and I'm still taking up a table that someone might be sitting at to order a plated meal from the kitchen instead. So yeah, I tip buffet.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on December 30, 2010, 01:07:12 PM
I tip for using the table at least. Same with coffee. If I go into a place to have a coffee and pie with friends but we bullshit around for an hour and a half I will tip like crazy because thats about two tables worth of time that we spent nursing a pot of coffee and five cups. Basically,  I tip not based on what I actually got, but for a number of reasons.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on December 30, 2010, 01:28:02 PM
Ok. See, that's what I do but I'm  crazy when it comes to tipping and I often get strange looks.  I never eat buffet though so I guess it never crossed my mind  before.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on December 30, 2010, 02:48:04 PM
I usually give a couple of bucks for a buffet.  I give a buck for a beer or takeout when I can spare it (or when I'm getting $30+ worth).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on December 30, 2010, 02:49:05 PM
Um. Quick question. Do you guys tip your waiters for buffet? I'm getting 40% tips on every table and that strikes ME as odd.

I only tip for exceptional service at the buffet and usually only about 10-15% at most unless the waiter was really cupping the balls.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 30, 2010, 08:02:42 PM
Depends on if there actual service or not (like getting drinks etc.). If it's a no-service buffet, then no, but if there was service, I tip normally, though at a slightly reduced rate. My benchmark is 15%-20%, but at a buffet with just nominal service I might tip something like 10%, which is still within the general range (10%-15% is the standard for this part of the country).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on December 30, 2010, 11:24:42 PM
40% Tip? Do you have a doppelganger going around blowing people left and right or something?

I try to make a point of getting a 20% gratuity (excepting where a gratuity is already demanded) for full service and half that for half service with a floor of $2, though maybe I should be raising that soon. I'm also a lot more willing to round in favor of the service staff the smaller the bill. (e.g. giving $5 if the "real" tip is $4.16)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on December 31, 2010, 10:07:37 AM
The rule of thumb I tend to follow is "20% on the amount before drinks and tax OR 15% on the amount after".  For most of my dining experiences, these amounts are roughly the same.

But yeah, I'll frequently round up.  And if I'm getting NOTHING but drinks, obviously I'll leave a tip on that.  Usually not 20%, of course.  (Though on the other hand, if I only get one drink, I'll probably leave a buck, which is considerably more than 20% of the price of most drinks.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on December 31, 2010, 11:06:17 AM
The only thing I can see that I do differently than most of you is I tip for time also. If my goofy ass friends and I take up a booth for an hour after we eat, nursing cups of coffee and talking, that's an entire table our server is potentially missing out on and should, in my opinion, be compensated, at least in part, for.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on December 31, 2010, 11:15:25 AM
For served food, divide by six, round up.  For buffet, divide by ten, round up.  For alcoholic beverages, one dollar per glass, regardless of the contents of the glass.  For tip jars, one dollar, unless the girl is cute.

People make tipping too damned complicated sometimes, I think.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on December 31, 2010, 01:16:23 PM
One thing that always annoyed me as a waitress was people who would get bad food in some way (not the correct order, something wrong with it, whatever) and complain/send it back, I'd replace it for them, apologizing and smiling the whole time, and then not get a tip.

Hey, guess what. I don't have anything to do with how your food gets prepared. Although I do have to give the cooks a cut of my tips, most people don't know that about the industry.

I understand that it's annoying that you got bad food, and you are perfectly justified in complaining to the management or never eating here again. But don't stiff the waitress unless you have some sort of problem with the service she is giving.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on December 31, 2010, 01:18:24 PM
Though, now that I think about it, it works the other way sometimes, too. I can remember people being very happy with their food, asking me what the recipe was, exclaiming this was the best "biscuits and gravy they've ever had" or whatever, and then picking up a huge tip after they leave.

Again, I don't make your food. But I'm not going to argue with a big tip, I guess.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on December 31, 2010, 01:20:12 PM
What fucking gestapo did you work for that made you split tips with the back of house staff? That's outrageous, it may even be illegal in your jurisdiction.

Having said that, some chain diners train their wait staff to cook most of the menu items. We had a waitress cook for us at village inn one night, food was shitty. I still left her a tip, though, because talk about doing something not in the scope of work.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on December 31, 2010, 01:34:41 PM
it was that way in arizona, despite the fact that wait staff did not earn minimum wage and had to make up the rest with tips.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on December 31, 2010, 03:41:02 PM
It happens pretty much everywhere.  Underpaid cooks complain that underpaid servers get a supplement, won't shut up until they get their unfair share.  The fact that it is semi-standard practice doesn't help.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on December 31, 2010, 04:17:21 PM
Some day we'll live in a society where wait staff make a decent human wage and we don't have to engage in the class warfare tactic of "tipping".  As a customer, you're being conditioned to regard your server not as an employee, but as an enemy who must be subservient or face meager wages.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on December 31, 2010, 05:23:25 PM
I want to say that tips make for a good incentive for better service but when you actually look at it the world's best service staff mostly comes from countries with little or no tipping custom (http://www.usatoday.com/travel/world/2007-09-10-tipchart_N.htm).

So huh.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Detonator on December 31, 2010, 06:04:47 PM
I want to say that tips make for a good incentive for better service but when you actually look at it the world's best service staff mostly comes from countries with little or no tipping custom (http://www.usatoday.com/travel/world/2007-09-10-tipchart_N.htm).

So huh.

As noted above, what people tip doesn't always have anything to do with the level of service.

It makes sense to me that a restaurant, paying a real wage instead of relying on customers' tips, would be more inclined to make sure their servers were doing a good job.  If waiter jobs are in higher demand, the management can afford to be choosy and get rid of ones that are rude to patrons.  Also, the patrons themselves may be more willing to complain to the management about rude waiters since they can't simply leave no tip.

Just a theory.  I wouldn't mind getting rid of tipping, but it's really to ingrained in our culture at this point.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on December 31, 2010, 07:53:34 PM
Yeah, I don't see the practice going anywhere in this country unless a number of very popular upscale restaurants decided to institute a NO TIP policy, and it caught on.  Even then, there's something very American about a consumer believing he has some sort of complete fiscal power over those who are providing a service to him, despite the fact that almost every other service industry in the country keeps the balance of power tipped very largely in the other direction.

I think health care reform would work out so much better if we just put doctors on a gratuity system.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on December 31, 2010, 08:45:35 PM
I tip when the service is good, I do not tip when the service is substandard, and I complain when it's obvious they didn't give a shit and actually diminished the experience I had at that restaurant.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on January 05, 2011, 07:23:14 AM
Tip fifty percent.
It's nice and it keeps you from eating out too much.




My best friend/favourite coworker lost his job last night, and now I probably won't see him in person for a long time, if at all.
This morning I actually asked if I could step up to take his position since it would be mutually beneficial to everyone involved (and because I could finally quit my job at the office supply store). The manager says I'm not ready, which -while understandable- is pretty aggravating. I'm easily the best and most reliable employee to be hired in the last three years.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on January 05, 2011, 07:55:01 AM
also one of the other managers is kind of a moron, makes extremely insensitive and inappropriate comments, and has the worst taste of any human being I have ever encountered* and it bugs me that she is somehow acceptable when I'm not



*typical outfit: brown velvet pants with pink and orange striped cloth belt, bright yellow "Twilight" messenger bag, glitter Batman t-shirt, knitted pink and purple winter hat, and a black cloak. The type usually reserved for Grim Reapers. And all of it is several sizes too small.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 05, 2011, 08:50:51 AM
That outfit is an impressive collision between many forces.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on January 05, 2011, 04:50:05 PM
Still working during the day. Still getting $5 per table. Except now the price of the buffet dropped to $5.99. Which is frankly ridiculous.
$5.99 for all you can eat salad, breadsticks, pizza, and whatever the pasta of the day is. And this is primo stuff. I've eaten a lot of Italian and I've seen what comes through the doors and how they make it and this is good quality food. But they had to drop the price to get people in the door so who knows? Downtown is dead during the day.

But I came up with an idea that we are going to implement. See, at the restuarant we have a large windowed area in the front of the store with a nice view of the street for a good cozy atmosphere. And it's seperated enough from the rest of the store that whoever sits in there gets a nice, private dining experience with a good view. Problem is no one sits there so the tables are always empty. And I notice that people think we are closed because we have empty tables in the window. So I came up with a deal. Sit in the window at night and get $1 off your alcoholic beverages. This'll help us get more use out of the shittons of liquor in the back and fill up the window at the same time. Downtown only has foot traffic at night and that's mainly because of the bars and pubs downtown. So get a few people in the window, laughing and have a few drinks while having a slice or some linguini or something and bam. We're on the map.

I'm anxious to see if it affects anything.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on January 06, 2011, 08:33:54 PM
my hand is covered in little tiny red dots that make it look like i've got a mild rash or bugs have been biting me. the search for a quick, inconspicuous way to hurt myself without leaving obvious marks continues.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 06, 2011, 09:31:35 PM
Er... :wat:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on January 06, 2011, 11:01:35 PM
keeping awake/operant conditioning
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on January 07, 2011, 09:44:46 AM
This is what people are reduced to after they banned Four Loko.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on January 07, 2011, 11:48:52 AM
Stress over work is a bad thing.  Especially when it drives you to borderline insanity.  I was forced into resignation the 4th, my last day will be the 14th.  I think I'll be moving back in with family to pursue some technical certificates, maybe pursue a masters.  If anyone knows of any microsoft technology jobs between Oklahoma City and Kansas City, I'd love to hear about them.

No one should live in fear of their employer.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on January 07, 2011, 11:59:05 AM
Nor man clearly something isn't working right if you've gotta inflict bodily harm on yourself in order to make this thing work. Time to REARRANGE THE PIECES MAN

There is a way to be exactly as or more comfortable than you are now without this, it is time to find this thing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on January 07, 2011, 08:45:04 PM
this is pretty much the best i can hope for right now or maybe ever.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on January 08, 2011, 07:39:44 PM
So the manager in charge of scheduling at Staples keeps giving me a hard time for not giving her my Blockbuster schedule on time for her to make the Staples schedule. The first time it happened, I felt like I was entirely to blame. After this many times, though, I am quite clearly not, and I'm still getting lectured for it. I've been in every day this week to try to submit my schedule, and she hasn't been there each time. I eventually just left it with the store manager. And I still got the same lecture. Oh, and did I mention that it means I only get one shift a week? Not even a full shift, either.
I'm not getting enough hours and I hate working there. I think it's time to look for a better job and quit.

...Should I let head office know that the manager in question lets her friends and family take multiple items during "one to a customer" door crasher sales?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on January 08, 2011, 08:13:14 PM
The part about the door crasher sales is up to you, I have no opinion either way, as you know if it hurts sales or undermines the stores reputation and I don't. But about your schedule, you should realize that having someone work two jobs is generally considered the WORST thing to have to work around in a flex scheduled job, especially if both jobs are flex scheduled. It might not be entirely your fault, or even a little bit your fault, for all I know she's a raving bitch, but trust me when I say you are going to get no sympathy while looking for a job as soon as they realize that you might not be able to work nights or weekends because of another job, and even more so when they realize that you had to quit your last job because of scheduling conflicts caused by you having two jobs. Most jobs expect that you make concessions for them, in scheduling, simply by virtue of the fact that you work for them and if the reason you can't do that is because you work for someone else, most managers start to get very upset, because to them, you're THEIR employee.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on January 08, 2011, 10:04:33 PM
Job get! Got a call on Wednesday to come in on Friday for a "first round group interview" for an executive assistant position at a local large nonprofit. I arrived first that day, and seven professional-looking women eventually showed up, with their ages ranging in the 20s to 40s. It was kind of a survivor style interview, where you spent fifteen minutes with either the hiring manager or the CEO. If you survived the first interview, you met with the other person, in between talking with one of the counselors who had been there for 22 years to pass the time and ask questions about the organization. In reality, the counselor was a third voting member, and I apparently was the top pick of all three women! They pretty much threw the job at me, as I think they have bigger plans for me down the road and I'm much more qualified than the position I'll be in. Salaried, about what I was making at the think tank, and full benefits (which I didn't have before). You can't begin to understand what a relief it was, considering I'm getting married in May and being employed is the last thing we need to be worried about right now.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on January 08, 2011, 10:15:29 PM
The part about the door crasher sales is up to you, I have no opinion either way, as you know if it hurts sales or undermines the stores reputation and I don't. But about your schedule, you should realize that having someone work two jobs is generally considered the WORST thing to have to work around in a flex scheduled job, especially if both jobs are flex scheduled. It might not be entirely your fault, or even a little bit your fault, for all I know she's a raving bitch, but trust me when I say you are going to get no sympathy while looking for a job as soon as they realize that you might not be able to work nights or weekends because of another job, and even more so when they realize that you had to quit your last job because of scheduling conflicts caused by you having two jobs. Most jobs expect that you make concessions for them, in scheduling, simply by virtue of the fact that you work for them and if the reason you can't do that is because you work for someone else, most managers start to get very upset, because to them, you're THEIR employee.

This explains a lot about why I don't get many second interviews.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 09, 2011, 07:33:30 AM
Finally, some good news in this thread :happy:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on January 09, 2011, 10:48:14 AM
But about your schedule, you should realize that having someone work two jobs is generally considered the WORST thing to have to work around in a flex scheduled job, especially if both jobs are flex scheduled. It might not be entirely your fault, or even a little bit your fault, for all I know she's a raving bitch, but trust me when I say you are going to get no sympathy while looking for a job as soon as they realize that you might not be able to work nights or weekends because of another job, and even more so when they realize that you had to quit your last job because of scheduling conflicts caused by you having two jobs. Most jobs expect that you make concessions for them, in scheduling, simply by virtue of the fact that you work for them and if the reason you can't do that is because you work for someone else, most managers start to get very upset, because to them, you're THEIR employee.
I totally understand, but what I'm getting at is that she tells me to bring me my schedule on days when she knows she won't be there, then chews me out for it. It's just stupid.

Also it implies that she doesn't expect me to show up.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 11, 2011, 06:59:53 AM
I have a job. As of tomorrow morning, I will no longer be an itinerant mooch of the state.

Got a job as a Fraud Investigator with Rogers (the second biggest phone company in the country and traditionally, the most evil one... uh guess I better not say that at work). Pretty decent money. Less than my last job, but it's downtown (worth at least a grand a year, never mind the savings in MY TIME), and there's an annual bonus that always gets paid (verified outside of the recruiter) and some shift premiums that go a long way towards closing the gap.

It's very close to where I live, so that's quite nice.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on January 11, 2011, 08:21:42 AM
It's very close to where I live, so that's quite nice.
It is hard to overstate the benefits of this.  My commute isn't even long but I'm still thinking of moving within walking distance in a couple months.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on January 11, 2011, 08:39:13 AM
i am actually a half-hour bike ride from work and i am intentionally avoiding carpooling or public transit or anything else like that because really, i need the exercise.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on January 11, 2011, 09:02:40 AM
Yeah, did I mention I finally got around to riding to work once during my last week there?  Had been meaning to do it since I moved to a house about 3mi from there, but stuff kept getting in the way -- first the heat, then my asthma, and then by the time those were both sorted my girlfriend's hours had been knocked back to just evenings so if I drove I could come home and have lunch with her.

But yeah, finally biked to work once, my last week there; the trail was nice and it felt good.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 11, 2011, 09:43:55 AM
Yeah, I can bike in maybe fifteen minutes, probably forty minutes or a half-hour to walk? I've walked down there before, I just need to actually time it.

It's short enough that walking may be faster when you factor in changing time after you get to the office.

Sure beats the hour+ bus ride/half-hour drive (the only reason it was a half-hour and not 45 minutes was because I could use the carpool lane on the motorbike).

EDIT: Also, the schedule (8-4 or 4-midnight, neither of which is bad), combined with it being downtown, means I don't have to ask for time off to go to my treatments. Which is more than a little useful, I would say.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on January 11, 2011, 11:07:03 AM
I get up at 4:30 in the morning to catch the bus at 5:20 to make it to work  by 7. I then get off of work at 4, and on good days I'm home by 6. Just in time to go to bed by 8 and do it all over again.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on January 13, 2011, 12:22:25 AM
the dude in the pod next to me is
a) 18 with a wife and kid
b) super cool with his goatee and fancy clothes
c) always trying to show me his pokemons
d) setting off my furry-sense all the time
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on January 13, 2011, 12:23:19 AM
also i am starting to get a lot of bruises and cuts on my arms from self-flagellation so i guess my theory that having a steady job would make my depression lighten a little has been MYTHBUSTED
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Zach on January 13, 2011, 12:26:26 AM
Overheard at work today: "Watch out! The dwarf urinated all over that chair earlier."

It was not heard out-of-context.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on January 13, 2011, 12:29:38 AM
my brother's GF works at a Peet's Coffee and constantly has to deal with customers called "Stinky*" and "Piss Cripple"



*DISCLAIMER: as a well-known sacramento homeless person this is his de facto name. he is not was well liked as "Downtown James Brown" who has many imitators; you can identify them by asking them to actually do an impression of James Brown, which they will fail
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 13, 2011, 02:56:14 PM
Well, two days in and I've already been struck by the overwhelming realization that getting another Office Job was precisely the wrong thing to do. And these people are all incredibly friendly, helpful, and well-organized, so it's not like I can blame the people.

Oh well, already forfeited my unemployment benefits by taking a job and besides, other jobs (manual labour) would have pay far less and fire me even faster.

Let's see how long this lasts!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on January 13, 2011, 07:32:05 PM
Use this opportunity to continue looking for something that you will actually enjoy while also having a stable job!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on January 13, 2011, 08:07:12 PM
I have been working of sorts for the past few weeks. Temping at a some-what local court and doing odd jobs to keep myself alive. Tomorrow I have an interview with the guy that's technically my boss in the temp position even though I've never met him and talked to him for the first time when he called me personally to tell me what was going on.

Since he's coming out from Brooklyn to do the interviews on the Friday of a pay week it looks like starting tomorrow I'll either have a real job or be screwed again.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 13, 2011, 08:59:47 PM
Use this opportunity to continue looking for something that you will actually enjoy while also having a stable job!

While that would be the conventionally-accepted wisdom, it's been nearly 32 years and I haven't found something i would enjoy (that someone would pay me enough money to live on for) yet.

I am not optimistic.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on January 13, 2011, 09:23:39 PM
do it anyway!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 14, 2011, 03:54:44 AM
Well, I don't really have a choice not to, don't I?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on January 14, 2011, 06:04:06 AM
You could just be miserable forever instead!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on January 14, 2011, 09:53:02 AM
Too late!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on January 14, 2011, 11:05:05 AM
Join us, Mongrel.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 14, 2011, 06:25:09 PM
Too late!

Pretty much.

The overall long-term outlook for my life - socially, financially, personally, whateverly - is not what you might call hopeful.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 18, 2011, 05:23:27 AM
Motherfucker! Today I found out that benefits are paid by deduction (this is not typical up here - usually benefits are just tacked on), effectively reducing my salary by a full $1000. Fuck!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on January 18, 2011, 08:16:57 PM
insomnia is getting worse. the combination of no sleep and biking 10 miles makes me feel very weird.

on the plus side, operant conditioning is working.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on January 19, 2011, 01:24:39 PM
I've tried full time, tried part time. Federal jobs, bordering on illegal jobs. Tried for and been turned down by everything, only one option remains.

I'm applying to Ed Hardy.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 19, 2011, 03:27:11 PM
Found out the pay schedules here are on a stupidly long delay. Guess I don't get any money this month!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on January 19, 2011, 05:12:05 PM
Matt, seriously? Go see a career counselor or something. You're starting to worry me.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 19, 2011, 05:31:54 PM
Funny you should mention that, because I certainly looked into it when I was off work. Career counsellors that do proper testing cost $2000, apparently.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on January 19, 2011, 05:35:04 PM
become a career counsellor
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lady Duke on January 19, 2011, 06:23:21 PM
While I was away at magfest, someone totally stole some shit from a case and my dad never noticed.  I mentioned a bracelet bar being empty today and accused him of scrapping all the silver, to which he replied "Huh?"  Never. Noticed. Ever.  It's a good thing I'm there to prevent that.  We'll be getting a camera soon, since theft is so incredibly prevalent as of late, and I really can't believe he actually never noticed someone opened a case.  It's creepy and I wish I could have been there to bust some stupid fuck :(
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on January 19, 2011, 06:24:21 PM
Quote
insomnia is getting worse. the combination of no sleep and biking 10 miles makes me feel very weird.

on the plus side, operant conditioning is working.

I am concerned about you.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 19, 2011, 07:53:53 PM
One other thing. One of the employees, not meaning anything, offhandedly mentioned that they had some previous recruits who "didn't make it" because they'd had a close death in their family during training (the implication being that because they had to take bereavement during training, the company simply dropped them?)

Uh, I guess it's a good thing I didn't mention my grandma or ask for any time off*. :mikey:

*This is not because I'm some kind of callous monster - I hope - but because I'm pretty sure my grandma would have thought it was just silly for me to take off work for it. My grandparents are/were incredibly practical people, which I will always treasure.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on January 19, 2011, 08:52:15 PM
One other thing. One of the employees, not meaning anything, offhandedly mentioned that they had some previous recruits who "didn't make it" because they'd had a close death in their family during training (the implication being that because they had to take bereavement during training, the company simply dropped them?)

Uh, I guess it's a good thing I didn't mention my grandma or ask for any time off*. :mikey:

*This is not because I'm some kind of callous monster - I hope - but because I'm pretty sure my grandma would have thought it was just silly for me to take off work for it. My grandparents are/were incredibly practical people, which I will always treasure.

i uh

i didn't think that was legal in Canada. I know it's not in the states.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on January 19, 2011, 09:03:00 PM
I am concerned about you.

i'll live.

and i try not to say that lightly.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on January 19, 2011, 11:26:32 PM
i didn't think that was legal in Canada. I know it's not in the states.

I doubt "took time off for bereavement" was the reason they gave on the paperwork.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on January 20, 2011, 10:24:50 AM
I was under the impression that an At Will employer could practically fire you for anything during you probationary phase and nearly anything afterwards? And as far as I know bereavement leave is not covered under any of the federal acts that define the exceptions to at-will employment. Correct me if I'm wrong, of course.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on January 20, 2011, 02:17:53 PM
Well, I was wrong regardless (http://employeeissues.com/bereavement_leave.htm), but I've never worked for an employer that didn't give bereavement leave. That's really outrageous.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 20, 2011, 03:08:06 PM
Well, to be fair, these people don't seem that sinister. Maybe the individual in question simply decided they didn't want to start a new job just then as they'd be busy for a while.

I do know that labour law here lets employers fire new hires for basically any reason they want within the first three months.

:dunno:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Spaco on January 20, 2011, 06:24:21 PM
Seems like all non-government jobs I've ever had were at-will. Is that not the standard?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on January 20, 2011, 06:51:46 PM
I honestly think the only thing that isn't 'at-will' is if you have a contract of some sort. I mean, at will is pretty much just defined as not having a contract for employment, isn't it?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on January 20, 2011, 07:03:40 PM
??? Um, I'm pretty sure I have to sign something which isn't dissimilar from a contract declaring that I understand my employment is "at-will". So... whuh?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on January 20, 2011, 07:07:41 PM
That thing also says "This is not a contract".  It's a legal waiver saying you can be fired at anytime.  Those things are basically for signing away a decent job.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on January 20, 2011, 07:29:29 PM
I'm not entirely sure what a "contract" is then, and my gut tells me I am not going to get a good answer from wiki.

EDIT:
Maybe I was totally wrong (http://"http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_contract_law") about wiki?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on January 21, 2011, 09:59:40 AM
There are exceptions, but as I'm familiar with the terms most employment is at-will, union, or contract. So if you're not under contract or part of a labor union, either you or your employer can terminate your employment for any reason.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on January 22, 2011, 09:01:52 PM
So tonight at work proved that Saturdays are just not my days. Get to work at 10. No one shows up until five til two. We close at two for two hours but nope! Not with customers. So I serve them until they leave at 3:30. I work at 4:30 so I rush home to grab my charger and figure why not nap. I lay down for 5 minutes and then get a call to go in to work. Fine.
Work was typical until I tripped. Destroying 18 wine glasses. Later on, I tripped and dropped a glass of soda. I caught it all but still. As I was getting ready to close up, a man came in to pick up his food. I got his order, walked back to him and slipped on a puddle of water from someone's shoes. I fell on my back, and managed to catch his spaghetti and sandwhich, but his pizza went airborne. And landed on my face. I handed the food to the man and walked back to tell them to throw him in a new pizza. The man called out "Wait." so I stopped and the youngest daughter (who was apparently running after me) ran into my legs, causing me to fall face first into the ruined pizza.
"I don't want another pizza. It's alright. I wasn't going to eat it tonight anyway." The older daughter rang the man up as I stood up and I took the remains into the back. Where they just mopped. This time I fell sideways and smacked my head on the sink. And dropped the pizza on my shirt again.

Everyone was laughing the whole time. Including my boss. He stopped laughing when he let me know I had to pay for the glasses I broke. So here I am at home, broke, with a welt on the side of my head and a burnt face and a bruised nose.
Fuck. Saturdays.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on January 22, 2011, 09:06:58 PM
and now we get to the wacky hijinx portion of the episode.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on January 22, 2011, 11:23:01 PM
No seriously Lottel.

Anime protagonist.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 23, 2011, 06:28:10 AM
For what it's worth, Starr commented that from first-hand experience (more from a medical perspective than a hospitality one) that working in a restaurant is one of the most regularly dangerous jobs there is.

EDIT: Hmmmmmm there's a joke in there played off the word "Hospitality", but I just couldn't think of a good one. Maybe that's the name of the series Lottel stars in.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on January 23, 2011, 09:46:47 AM
Also what kind of terrible manager doesn't already have broken dishes built into their operating expenses?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on January 23, 2011, 10:52:25 AM
Also what kind of terrible manager doesn't already have broken dishes built into their operating expenses?

This, no shit. I swear to god, Lottel, you just like working for terrible people.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on January 23, 2011, 11:18:24 AM
Well, to be entirely fair, this isn't the first batch of dishes I broke. And several dishes had been broken the night before (not by me).
We were well over budget on dishes.  And business hasn't been that good on top of that.
It wasn't a "Anything you break you have to buy" sort of thing and more of a "the store really can't afford to spend more money on things like that. We're in the red as it is. We'll have to take it out of your paycheck this week."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on January 23, 2011, 05:39:23 PM
Also, who breaks 18 of anything at once and doesn't expect to be held accountable? Honestly, hey, shinra and rico may have worked in the business, but my experiences in management and what can and will get you into trouble boil down to two things. Not showing up to work on time and costing the company money*. Hell, if you were so inclined you could say the reason the first one is on there is because it is in fact just the second.

*This is a very large catch all reason that can include such far reaching things as stealing, causing shrinkage, not properly dealing with perishables, inventory problems, mismanagement of company equipment and funds, not working while on the clock, showing up late, taking long breaks, inappropriate phone calls, etc.

EDIT: I just realized this sounds like a dig at Lottel. It isn't. Near as I can tell he is as OK as he can be about having to pay for something he broke. Its more of a question as to why people are surprised that he had to pay for it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on January 23, 2011, 09:02:34 PM
I understand the theory, I just—being a retail manager who stocks a ton of glassware—think it's shitty management.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on January 23, 2011, 09:08:31 PM
My experiences have also proven to me that most people in upper management got there through sheer force of will or longevity and not by merit of actual management abilities... in other words, I agree with you. However, after lottel's comment I must say it doesn't seem like they charge every time you break something and that is more leeway than I've known anyone to be given. Maybe his boss isn't all bad then... of course lets not even get into the kids he's got to put up with and hours worked situation. Or the whole responsibility without compensation bullshit "You get to hire people, be the shift leader, etc". At the theater I was promoted every single time I was promoted to coincide with a yearly raise, so that they could call my yearly raise my pay increase from being promoted.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 27, 2011, 01:39:14 PM
Today I spoke to a man who was a real Italian (the name was anyway, without a doubt), but was simultaneously like some kind of living cartoon version of every generic mafia character ever.

After explaining we couldn't do anything about the guy who'd used his wife's info (she knew they guy, we can't do anything when the victim and the perp know each other - think kid runs up mom's account. The only option is for them to go and file charges or work it out in person), the husband came on to try and wheedle.

Imagine a voice a fat cousin might make while pretending to do "Eyetalian Gangityster" impressions. Badly.

"Hay, ya know dis guy, dis guy is like a conartist he know evabuddy. Evabuddy know dis guy. I don't go to th' cops, you know? I'm ah... not a 'cop' kind a guy, you know?

I evah find dis guy, you know, I gonna break his face, only he's missing, see. Like, fer years. See it's not like a personal ya know... not just my wife knew him. Evabuddy knew him. Say like... you,.. you from Montreal buddy?" [they were from Montreal]

"No, I'm from Toronto."

"Well, see like, how about Lefty Two-Shoes, you know that guy?" [There are 6+ Million people in this town... which really isn't much more than there is on Montreal]

"No sir."

"Uhhhh well... ah well, he's anudder crook. But from Toronna. Evabuddy know him. Uh anyway. I find dis guy I'ma break his face."

Then he let me transfer him to A/R to pay the bill anyway to clear his wife's credit (the perp's name was VERY SUSPICIOUSLY SIMILAR to the husband's name.)





That's easily the most awesome call so far.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on January 27, 2011, 01:43:56 PM
i've worked 1-2 hours of mandatory overtime every day this week and I feel like I am dying.

:(
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on January 27, 2011, 01:45:44 PM
10 hour days huh? That's rough.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 27, 2011, 01:56:03 PM
Unless you get 4x10 (i.e. the 4-day workweek). That's the best work schedule in the universe.

But I'm assuming Shinra's just getting fucked over with a 5 or 6 day workweek here.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on February 08, 2011, 02:28:56 PM
Tonight was weird. We had a couple come in and order hot tea, cannelloni, and tortellini.
Right away they stopped me and told me to take back the tea. Said it was awful. I had a sip. It tasted normal to me but ok. Then they weren't happy with our salad dressing selection (no ceasar and no light french. Oops.) Then they weren't happy with the breadsticks.  I came back several times and asked how things were going and did everything else I normally do for a table. Nope. Cannelloni was bland and the tortellini was too tough. On their way out, they stopped to talk to my boss a bit. During the conversation, they said their waiter was insufferable.

I feel awful. I know it's silly but dang it. I've never actually had people complain about my waiting. Even if the food is awful, my service usually makes it  a decent time. And the food here is great. So I think they were just grumpy or something but still.

  :;_;:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on February 08, 2011, 02:59:36 PM
wanted free meal
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on February 08, 2011, 03:18:45 PM
Unless you get 4x10 (i.e. the 4-day workweek). That's the best work schedule in the universe.

But I'm assuming Shinra's just getting fucked over with a 5 or 6 day workweek here.

Yeah.


As a plus, I'm overtime exempt through the week while I'm in training, and because of a series of unfortunate snowstorms that hit the Tulsa area I'm now work from home during inclement weather, which should be nice through training, esp. since we're getting shit on with snow right now.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on February 08, 2011, 03:40:58 PM
Tonight was weird. We had a couple come in and order hot tea, cannelloni, and tortellini.
Right away they stopped me and told me to take back the tea. Said it was awful. I had a sip. It tasted normal to me but ok. Then they weren't happy with our salad dressing selection (no ceasar and no light french. Oops.) Then they weren't happy with the breadsticks.  I came back several times and asked how things were going and did everything else I normally do for a table. Nope. Cannelloni was bland and the tortellini was too tough. On their way out, they stopped to talk to my boss a bit. During the conversation, they said their waiter was insufferable.

I feel awful. I know it's silly but dang it. I've never actually had people complain about my waiting. Even if the food is awful, my service usually makes it  a decent time. And the food here is great. So I think they were just grumpy or something but still.

  :;_;:

Sounds like what Nor said - they wanted a free meal so they complained the whole way through. Talk to your boss, see what they say, if you're worried.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on February 08, 2011, 09:10:19 PM
I love the episode of Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares where the old Jewish group complain to get free food, and he kicks them out.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on February 09, 2011, 12:45:34 AM
The F-Word: Gordon Ramsay vs James May (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vTOfhQ_SZEg#)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on February 09, 2011, 02:40:57 AM
If they come back, make sure they get food worth complaining about.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on February 09, 2011, 03:00:58 AM
The free food thing would have more weight if they TOLD me about the problems. I'd come by and ask that they'd make a face and say "It's... alright." But I was cleaning and overheard them complain about the food. The only complaint they told me directly was the tea was awful.
I think they were just grumpy, unhappy people. The conversation with my boss was basically them being snobby and rude (and a tad racist).
I just think they wanted to not like things.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 09, 2011, 05:24:01 AM
Guys did you hear the one where the waiter goes up to a table of Jewish mothers and asks "Is anything all right?"
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on February 15, 2011, 09:50:00 PM
My last customer of the night thought that the Necronomicon he bought at Barnes & Noble was a translation of an actual historical document, translated by HP Lovecraft (who he believed was found dead in a locked room, having torn himself to shreds) and written by Alistor Crowley.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 16, 2011, 07:29:53 AM
Too bad you didn't have a copy of this (http://www.amazon.com/Evil-Dead-Book-Limited/dp/B000A3XY9Q/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1297895481&sr=8-4) handy. You probably could have made him :scanners:

Of course, then you would've had to clean it up, I guess.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on February 16, 2011, 12:30:43 PM
We actually got onto the subject because that exact DVD was on the counter.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on February 16, 2011, 04:16:11 PM
I'm just now getting ready to go home for the night.

...so I can run a 3-hour test before the beginning of the day tomorrow.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on February 16, 2011, 05:40:21 PM
Ok. A while back a horrible, horrible experience happened to me that I was just too... overwhelmed to share. I believe I mentioned it in IRC that night. I don't know. I think I got pretty drunk that night.
It's the day a man shat on my floor and I had to continue waiting on him.

I finally was able to type up the full story, which I posted on my blog (http://sunshinepanic.wordpress.com/2011/02/17/the-shitty-day/). I really dislike telling people to check out things I do, but dammit. I need to share this war story.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on February 16, 2011, 06:54:54 PM
Wait for him to come in again, shit on his car while he's eating.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on February 17, 2011, 12:08:41 AM
You don't reserve the right to refuse service to patrons or eject them for any reason?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 17, 2011, 12:33:03 AM
The restaurant/business does. That kind of executive power is rarely granted to servers directly.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on February 17, 2011, 12:57:38 AM
That, uh.  Seems like the sort of thing to call the police over.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on February 17, 2011, 02:57:29 AM
Wait for him to come in again, shit on his car while he's eating.
I never want to see that man again. Ever.

You don't reserve the right to refuse service to patrons or eject them for any reason?
At the time, Frank was furious. Now he thinks it's kinda funny. Francesca hates the man, though. Not sure why she hasn't done anything about it.
I will say that for a jerk, he somehow has a lot of power with local small business owners. He's gotten a few stores shut down before by complaining. He's got a seat on some sort of council too.
Whatever. I've got their word that if does anything REMOTELY gross again, he' banned for good.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on February 17, 2011, 04:12:33 AM
Bodily excrement is the worst. At the theatre we once had a girl throw up alcohol and popcorn literally from the door to the bathroom all the way to the back stall (I guess she wanted a big handicapped one to throw up in). It was a sickeningly sweet smelling alcohol too and the worst thing about it is, before we found out it happened she saw us (me and one of the ushers) and was like *GIGGLE* "Your bathroom might be a little dirty." Also she weighed like 100 lbs so I have no idea how she threw up like she did. It was honestly amazing and I salute her.

Price you pay, I guess, for working in an industry that people frequent drunk, after hours and with their friends, all of which can cause no end to silly or disgusting shit they might do.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 17, 2011, 06:51:38 AM
I have a job interview. Tomorrow. In Nashville.

So holy crap get out of class at 10:00 tweak my portfolio go home do laundry go to sleep get up drive for five hours to go interview drive home for five hours sleep get up go to work Saturday at 3:00
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on February 17, 2011, 12:27:42 PM
Wow.  Kinda makes me appreciate my old industry.  I got the job for Bell Helicopter basically by shooting the shit, military style, with the supervisor over the phone from Texas to Maryland.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on February 18, 2011, 12:20:59 AM
That is still how you can get a job. In any industry. Never underestimate the power of being able to shoot the shit well and/or the ability to sell your self well. I have never filled out an application before I knew I had the job. Or more, I should say, I've only ever had to fill out an application as a technicality for paperwork.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 18, 2011, 08:29:24 AM
So I drove for four and a half hours for this job interview.

Dude wasn't there when I got in. I waited for him for over half an hour.

Interview took twenty minutes. Maybe he'll call me back in a couple weeks, which in the past five months' experience means I'll never hear from him again.

tl;dr: MOTHERFUCKER
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on February 18, 2011, 08:31:26 AM
Call him on Wednesday.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 18, 2011, 10:44:17 AM
So my father took me out to dinner tonight. To the place I'd just applied.

The owner pulled me aside as we were leaving and said, "It looks like this is going to work out". So perhaps my initial impressions were incorrect and I'll have a job when I move here.

Maybe before, I offered to come up on weekends to work Friday night, Saturday, and Sunday lunch before going back to school Monday through Thursday to finish out the quarter. It'll be grueling but if it'll get me the job, it's worth it.

YOU HEAR THAT, EVERYWHERE ELSE I APPLIED IN THE LAST FIVE MONTHS ALSO CURRENT JOB? I'M ACTUALLY A PRETTY GODDAMNED DEDICATED WORKER.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on February 24, 2011, 06:22:44 AM
I finally got a job. It's at the restaurant my mom tends bar at, washing dishes. By the time I got off shift today they were already talking about putting me on the line so that'd be cool. Of course it was my first day at a place doing a job I've never really done before starting with a massive party and by the end of it I had started smoking again.

All-in-all I'd call it a net gain though.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on February 24, 2011, 12:16:47 PM
Anybody remember that old commercial with the lady going "I've fallen and I can't get up"? That happened yesterday in front of the bakery yesterday. I was on my break when apparently some old chinese guy fell down and couldn't seem to walk right afterwards. Turns out he was diabetic. They had to call in the EMTs and put him on a stretcher and everything.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 28, 2011, 08:35:27 AM
You know, this job is incredibly boring and awful, but I tell ya... it is fun to talk to a legit customer AND the sketchy guy who's impersonating that customer all in the same morning. 

OH HI JIM, YOU SOUND DIFFERENT! IT'S PLAYTIME! :whoops:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on February 28, 2011, 09:15:12 AM
So what obvious mistake did the impersonator make?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 28, 2011, 09:30:00 AM
Well, I knew it was the impersonator before I picked up because he was trying to follow up on a pile of fraudulent orders he'd made on the legit guy's account (all of which we'd already cancelled).

I was going to play with him, but he hung up pretty quick (Not much else to do, really. We'd stopped him already and it's a different dept's decision to escalate the few really bad cases to the police. We already had his real info, so that was it.). I probably let way too much glee shine through.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on February 28, 2011, 10:46:23 AM
 :batman: You overplayed your part, 'yo.'
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on February 28, 2011, 12:36:40 PM
Pretty good odds I've got a 2-week contract.  That's it -- no chance of a permanent position and the pay's not great, but it's better than nothing.  And most importantly, it means I'm eligible for my health plan for a couple more months; I was just about to have to switch to COBRA.

Have an interview for something more long-term on Thursday but this might make me have to reschedule; will see how flexible the bosses are.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on February 28, 2011, 03:02:49 PM
Excerpts from the packing slip from a vendor I will certainly be ordering from again:
"We pay freight for returns as a courtesy to our customers.... If you are only returning a part of your order, please use a box that accommodates the number of units being returned—in other words, if you're only sending back two wrist cuffs and a T-shirt, don't send them in a coffin-sized crate filled with bricks and lead pipe. We know the temptation is tough to resist, but still..."
"If you are missing a product from your order and the item/s are included on your invoice, please call Customer Service and yell at us loudly. We recommend avoiding curse words, but feel free to use relatively mild insults like 'rat bastard' and 'Regis'."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on March 03, 2011, 05:30:26 AM
Okay, so my company just got stone cold bought out by Houghton Mifflin Harcourt, and they're going to be moving us all to corporate HQ in downtown Boston by year's end. On the plus, this means 401k perhaps, on the downside, I will go from a tight, delightful troupe of 12 people to the tiniest cog in the tiniest corner of a 4,000-employee conglomerate. Forecast currently has me training their employees how to do my job.

Employee reviews (http://www.glassdoor.com/Reviews/Houghton-Mifflin-Harcourt-Company-Reviews-E275_P2.htm#) are not promising, either.

GOT A BAD FEELING ABOUT THIS
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on March 04, 2011, 07:40:00 AM
I got kind of bored with not having a job, so I got one. Doesn't start until later on this spring, but come late April I'm a projectionist again. Yay!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on March 04, 2011, 09:47:55 AM
That's good. I heard you were a good projectionist.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on March 04, 2011, 10:03:38 AM
I heard that too. I was expecting to have to work back up to it, but the manager was like, "Well what I could really use is a projectionist" so I was like :D
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on March 04, 2011, 11:01:20 AM
Pretty good odds I've got a 2-week contract.  That's it -- no chance of a permanent position and the pay's not great, but it's better than nothing.  And most importantly, it means I'm eligible for my health plan for a couple more months; I was just about to have to switch to COBRA.

Have an interview for something more long-term on Thursday but this might make me have to reschedule; will see how flexible the bosses are.

Hah, cobra. You might as well set your money on fire.

Good luck.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on March 04, 2011, 11:12:11 AM
So my job at the Verizon IT service desk continues, and I am learning a lot more about what exactly Verizon does to earn it's income. Verizon's obviously best known for it's retardedly huge CDMA network, but they're also one of the world's largest internet providers. Coming with that territory is apparently multiple-million dollar contracts with a number of extremely large companies that pay entirely too much to employ workers like me. Verizon acts as the helpdesk for a few large companies, like Fedex and Dunkin Donuts. Agents who have been on with the helpdesk past the intro hire period usually get picked up and trained for commercial accounts so they can help Verizon actually, you know, earn a wage. It's a step up from resetting the passwords of central office technicians who only log into their email to get employee discounts.

I've recently been trained to support Vangent. (http://www.vangent.com/) Vangent is an information management company that handles almost entirely government contracts - the largest of which is social security and medicare. You would think that a company that handles government accounts would have some serious internal security policies. Nope! Hilariously, anyone in the company can reset the password of anyone else in the company with a simple phone call. No password, no secret question. All they have to do is provide an employee id - and we have no way of verifying that the employee ID even belongs to them! Granted, you have to go through a secure VPN to access their network, but we even have Vangent users who access the VPN without being on vangent assets, and considering how freely the company gives away laptops to their employees, an enterprising terrorist, thief, or spy could access to an incredible amount of information with a little know-how.

In short: hurray for knowing too fucking much, and having entirely too much power at my fingertips. Hell, the things I could do to the Verizon network with my access alone is bad enough. Now I have access to government accounts?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on March 04, 2011, 11:21:48 AM
The ministry of fiscal responsibility is going to take you in Shinra.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 04, 2011, 03:19:43 PM
Hah, cobra. You might as well set your money on fire.

Yeah, I know.  The insurance I'm on now is a pretty big ripoff too, but as I've said before, most temps don't get insurance at all.  And any kickback on all the meds I take for my asthma is a relief.

Anyway, yeah, job's a go; I sit in a hot room performing repetitive tasks all day for not very much pay, but the people I work with are good and I'm working for an organization I'm proud to be a part of.  Plus it sounds like they've got more rollouts coming, so even though it's not steady work it might end up being a sporadic thing, which is better than a one-time thing.

Heard out of another agency today that seems pretty keen to place me in a sysadmin job.  Good pay; don't know who it's for yet.  I know that it's graveyard and it's 20 miles or so from where I live -- but the graveyard thing's not necessarily bad (you mean when it's 110 out this summer I'll be SLEEPING?), and if I'm driving that far I'd rather it not be rush hour anyway.  And given the way our schedules are currently working, I wouldn't really see my girlfriend any less than I already do.

Not sure what to do about having a beer after work, though.  Bars are closed and kicking back with a beer on the couch at 9 AM just seems weird.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on March 04, 2011, 03:35:08 PM
actually, going back to the discussions about saturday morning cartoons ..
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 06, 2011, 09:42:36 AM
I've been looking for a job in Atlanta for six months, with virtually no leads for three.

I'm about to move to Nashville. I have three job leads there already.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 06, 2011, 10:12:30 AM
tl;dr your entire problem was living in Georgia?

I've got family in Nashville, but I don't think they can help you very much.  Still, I'll remember it if it ever turns out they can.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 07, 2011, 02:52:06 AM
To be fair, I did briefly move back to Nashville in 2008, and couldn't find work there then either.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on March 07, 2011, 04:05:48 AM
What're you trying to find work doing?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on March 07, 2011, 04:08:38 AM
Being a super-chef?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 07, 2011, 08:50:21 AM
Being a SOUPER CHEF

Oh Classic, that was terrible.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on March 07, 2011, 09:00:40 AM
I was more imagining him fighting crime with a 6-burner stove, but that's also the kind of horrible thing I would think of and post.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 07, 2011, 02:11:24 PM
The job has hit the point where I'm copying large files, which of course means I'm mostly sitting there waiting for the filecopy to finish.  Easy stuff, obviously, but it's frustrating, partly because I prefer to be doing something, and partly because a fucking network hiccup can kill 20GB file transfers on a dozen different computers simultaneously and make me have to start the entire fucking process over.  (This happened to a machine that had "35 seconds remaining" on its dialog today.  I am not kidding.)

So out of curiosity, has Windows 6.x fixed MS's fucking unbelievably bad, inadequate, 1980's-era filecopy?  Like, is Explorer now prepared for the fact that people sometimes make 90-minute network downloads?  Because XP sure as hell isn't.  (Of course, at least it's just ONE big file on each machine in this case.  It's much worse when you're copying a huge directory structure, have trouble copying one file, and Explorer terminates the entire copy halfway through with no easy mechanism for picking up where you left off without overwriting the files that DID copy.)

(I am aware there are third-party tools that will handle interruptions/resumes, and there even seem to be a couple MS ones, though I'm not sure if they support network directory paths.  But I'm not sure it's worth the effort to get approval to install additional software on these computers, given that this is only a two-week contract and this is a medical organization and therefore there's even more red tape involved in getting software approved than in a typical job.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on March 07, 2011, 11:38:59 PM
You'll be extremely pleased to know that, fuck no windows hasn't fixed the problem of network file transfers.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 08, 2011, 09:26:55 AM
Yaaaaay.

Anyway.  They want me to come back next week.  Not sure if it's the whole week or just a couple days; hope I don't get stuck in the donut hole where I make the same amount as I would from unemployment, but of course there are benefits to working besides just the paycheck.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on March 08, 2011, 01:10:06 PM
Been out of work since January.  Shifting gears, just got CompTIA A+ certified, shooting for Network+ in two weeks.  Goodbye programming, I'll work helldesk before I come back to you.  Time to fix some god damned computers...  If I can find a lead.  My agent says there are 15 openings, will see who wants to talk.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 08, 2011, 01:30:18 PM
Don't know what the market's like out there but I've had trouble even getting that work over the past 4 years or so.  A+ isn't worth what it used to be, and while fixing computers isn't as stressful as programming it doesn't pay anywhere near as well.

Good luck to you.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on March 08, 2011, 01:42:29 PM
Making the big money has no purpose if you're incapable of having time to enjoy it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 08, 2011, 02:03:40 PM
I hear ya, but I'll take it if somebody offers it.

But yeah, as long as you make enough to keep a roof over your head and not stress over the bills, there's nothing wrong with having a tight entertainment budget.  I worked a shit computer repair job for two years and managed to squirrel enough away that I still buy comics every week (albeit a fraction of the number I used to).  I've gotten my unemployment to stretch so that I can pay my share of rent, bills, groceries, food, gas, and health insurance, though if I were living alone I'd be struggling.

And the job certainly wasn't all bad.  I worked with good people, it was 8-5, and the stress and pay were appropriate for the work.  That's what's important to me: not whether I'm being paid well, but whether I'm being paid fairly.  Back in '07, when I was running the backend of an ISP singlehandedly for, oh, slightly more than I'm making right now babysitting filecopies for 8 hours a day, I finally got fed up and demanded that they bring the pay and the work in line.  It was either-or; I told them I'd be happy to keep my current salary if they'd take my cell phone back and let me work Monday through Friday and 8 to 5.  They told me that wasn't going to happen; I told them they had two weeks to learn Linux.

Anyway, all that to say, while my warehouse job sucked, and gave me a lung fungus and asthma, I was probably going to get those anyway sooner or later and it had its charm.  The biggest stress, really, was being a temp for 2 years and knowing the hammer could drop at any time -- which, on the plus side, meant I was prepared when it did.









(The hammer is my penis.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 13, 2011, 05:07:24 AM
I had to laugh at the fact that I work for one of the largest tech-sector companies int he country, but we only upgraded from IE 6 to IE 8 LAST WEEK.

It was mostly hilarious because the company's OWN WEBSITES had been complaining that we were using outdated browsers for some time now (since well before I was hired).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on March 14, 2011, 11:01:33 AM
Working email queue today. This is the most laid back job in the world. 3/4s of the emails I'm working are status reqs, referrals and out of office replies. Helldesk indeed. If I get this every Monday I might start liking my job again.   :nyoro~n:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MadMAxJr on March 15, 2011, 04:12:37 PM
Three more middleman agents contact me, specializing in placing technology people.  Promise me interviews.  Empty, empty promises.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 15, 2011, 04:26:43 PM
There's something very discouraging about being sent home early because they ran out of shit for you to do today.  Of course, as much as anything it's because I was so damn efficient yesterday.

Ah well.  Came home, went for a bike ride, cleaned house for company, hopefully those DB's are extracted in the morning.  At any rate I should at least get outside the donut hole this week, and if the SNAFU continues I may even have work next week.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on March 22, 2011, 07:25:46 PM
DAMN THESE POWERS OF MINE. The pull of evil is too strong. I'm corrupting. And these customers are now spending 3 times what they planned.
We are now their favorite place to eat, they love everything, they are getting dessert, and I got the guy to ask out his dream girl.
He's bringing her here to eat.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 22, 2011, 07:53:36 PM
Boss: Okay, you're done; we might have more work for you in a few weeks.
(1 HOUR LATER)
Rep: Are you done with your latest contract?
Me: Uh, yeah, like an hour ago.
Rep: Okay.  How soon can you get to north Scottsdale?  We have something there for a couple days.
Me: ...kay.  Let me just have a bite of lunch.

(15 minutes later)
Rep: Looks like they've hit a snag and can't do anything else today.  I'll let you know if they need anybody tomorrow.

(An hour later)
Other Rep: Can you do a twelve-hour-a-day job reinstalling Windows on 4000 computers that got hit with a virus for the next week?
Me: Uh, okay, but Rep said there was this other thing in north Scottsdale.
Other Rep: Yeah, I told her to call you, that one fell through.
Me: ...kay.

(An hour later)
Other Rep: Actually, I guess that first job is still up in the air right now; we'll wait to hear what they have to say tomorrow before I put you in the twelve-hour-a-day one that pays less.


I'll say one thing, it's nice to be wanted.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 22, 2011, 09:10:55 PM
Ah,  a new city, ripe with new opportunities and fresh prospects!









Dammit I'm still fucked aren't I?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lady on March 22, 2011, 10:22:00 PM
where at, rupples?

I had a telephone interview for something that I was approached for, and now I feel amazing about it, but don't worry, my nagging lack of self worth will slowly bring

me



ba
   ck


d
 o
  w
   n
.

 :whoops:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on March 23, 2011, 01:15:41 AM
That post was truly a work of art.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on March 25, 2011, 09:48:00 AM
My current job is unraveling my mind. So I ask this; is there a reliable site to get a resume template from? I feel I should have one ready. And when applying for positions, I understand there are times where a cover letter is appropriate (very professional, corporate jobs), but are there times where they're inappropriate?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on March 25, 2011, 10:04:23 AM
I can't think of a situation where a cover letter is not a good idea. Unless you're terrible at selling your strengths, nothing bad can come of giving them more to like about you.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 25, 2011, 10:09:32 AM
I always do at least a brief cover letter to highlight how the contents of my resume apply directly to what they're looking for, but you might want to do the opposite of what I do, because.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on March 25, 2011, 11:10:20 AM
I can't think of a situation where a cover letter is not a good idea. Unless you're terrible at selling your strengths, nothing bad can come of giving them more to like about you.
Pretty much. Especially these days when people just mass bomb hundreds of jobs at a time with online resume distribution tools, anything that says, "Hey, I actually know what your company is and what you're looking for with this posting," is a good thing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on March 26, 2011, 05:50:42 AM
I know people who do not typically write cover letters, and have gotten interviews/jobs.

I think these people are insane. A cover letter is never a bad idea. Keep it concise, sell yourself. It helps to set you apart. In other words, what these other dudes said.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on March 27, 2011, 05:30:32 AM
Hours got cut again at work. Used to be 4-10 pretty much every day. Then business was slow so 5-10. Then business was slow so 5-9. Then business was slow so we shut down on Sundays.

I now show up 6-9 most days of the week. How fun.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 27, 2011, 05:46:37 AM
Wait, I'm confused... I thought business boomed wherever you went entirely on account of your chi aura mere presence?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on March 27, 2011, 06:00:37 AM
Only if people actually showed UP to buy things.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on March 27, 2011, 01:16:16 PM
Maybe you should stand outside wearing a sandwich board.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on March 27, 2011, 03:30:33 PM
Last time I did that, people threw things at me.

No.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 27, 2011, 03:37:17 PM
Don't people throw things at you anyway?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on March 27, 2011, 07:22:29 PM
Only panties and hotel room keys.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Burrito Al Pastor on March 28, 2011, 06:17:04 PM
Got called into work today because somebody called in sick.

Spent the majority of my shift building Mjolnir. At one point I actually had to crawl inside Mjolnir to fasten wingnuts. (The whole display is something like 8' by 3' by 7' tall.)

Presumably they were dwarven wingnuts.

At the time that I left, it still wasn't actually done. Turns out building Mjolnir takes a while. Especially when elves wrote the instructions. (Twice it told me things which were exactly the opposite of true.)

I get it when we take it down, assuming it hasn't been trashed by then. (Damn kids.)

I have the best job ever.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: jsnlxndrlv on March 29, 2011, 10:57:57 AM
Today I had the fourth interview I've gotten since I lost my job six months ago. Getting hired would be the best birthday present I can realistically imagine.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on March 29, 2011, 12:41:06 PM
I'll call the girls I got for the super orgy I planned for you, I guess.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 29, 2011, 10:39:34 PM
Boss: Okay, you're done; we might have more work for you in a few weeks.
(1 HOUR LATER)
Rep: Are you done with your latest contract?
Me: Uh, yeah, like an hour ago.
Rep: Okay.  How soon can you get to north Scottsdale?  We have something there for a couple days.
Me: ...kay.  Let me just have a bite of lunch.

(15 minutes later)
Rep: Looks like they've hit a snag and can't do anything else today.  I'll let you know if they need anybody tomorrow.

(An hour later)
Other Rep: Can you do a twelve-hour-a-day job reinstalling Windows on 4000 computers that got hit with a virus for the next week?
Me: Uh, okay, but Rep said there was this other thing in north Scottsdale.
Other Rep: Yeah, I told her to call you, that one fell through.
Me: ...kay.

(An hour later)
Other Rep: Actually, I guess that first job is still up in the air right now; we'll wait to hear what they have to say tomorrow before I put you in the twelve-hour-a-day one that pays less.


I'll say one thing, it's nice to be wanted.

Neither of those two positions ever materialized, which is pretty much par for the course.

However, the place where I just finished working just got another shipment of laptops in and wants me back for another couple of weeks.  So that's good.  Also means that I'll be passing the minimum threshold to be eligible for unemployment NEXT year, though I sure as hell hope I won't be needing it.  (Also, the minimum amount sucks.  Well, I'm currently making the MAXIMUM amount, which STILL sucks; the minimum just sucks four times as much.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 30, 2011, 08:10:19 PM
So I moved to Nashville with four solid leads to apply to.

Yesterday, I visited my first one again. The owner had already seen my portfolio and was enthusiastic about hiring me -- but he told me that with his restaurant being so new, he didn't yet have the income stream coming in to hire anyone else. So he didn't have a position for me.  :nyoro~n:

Today I went to the second and third.

At the second, the kitchen manager wasn't in. They told me to come back and fill out an application/leave a resume tomorrow. :shrug:

At the third, the kitchen manager sat down with me, went over my application, looked at my portfolio, and told me they were fully staffed and didn't need to hire anyone. But they're opening a new restaurant across town!  :glee:

In August.  ::(:

So what the hell, on my way back to the van to drive home, I swung into the steakhouse across the street. I filled out an application, dropped off my portfolio, and talked to the kitchen manager. He went over my availability with school, and looked closely at all of the stuff in my portfolio. He pointed out that with no experience on a line, he would probably have a prep position to start, but that's it. I told him that'd be fine. Then he asked the important question: how much am I looking to get paid?

I pointed out that, with somewhat limited availability and no experience, I'd be willing to take $8.50 or $9 an hour to start.

He shook his head and smiled to himself.

And told me he'd give me $11.

I gotta call him back Tuesday to see if I got the job, but things are looking promising.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on March 30, 2011, 09:15:46 PM
YAY! And I'm not being sarcastic. One day I'm going to meet you and I'm going to shake your hand AND EMBRACE YOU AS BROTHER.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on April 03, 2011, 06:33:51 AM
Two weeks in a row of large midday parties followed by a full house for the rest of the night means it's time to start actively seeking new employment.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 09, 2011, 06:27:43 PM
My bosses are tired of this town and are giving up and moving to Tuscola. Business there is great. Half of Tuscola heard we were THINKING about going there and are now regular customers. Town is helping to pay for us to relocate and are practically giving us the building. The city council is in love with my bosses.
Normally I'd think "Eh. Too bad. Gotta find a new job." But wait? What's this?
The offered me a job up there. Triple what I'm paid now and an extra $15 a day just for showing up. I'm running the front of the store. They want me to be the face of the place. Of course, I'll be training people there to wait tables. But this time I won't be also waiting tables. AND I'll have the ability to fire and hire people. Bosses said they'll take care of the food and the paperwork. I'll take care of the rest.
Honest to god management with pretty good pay, With a group of people I like and a nice population full of people waiting to spend money. (Tuscola has a lot of money. They spend it like crazy. The town AND the people. It's a nice looking town.)

I'm not EXCITED. But it's an interesting offer. My only other offers are corporate fast food with people I hate or being my ex's dad's paperwork monkey.

I'm going to keep looking.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 09, 2011, 06:37:55 PM
That sounds like a pretty damn good opportunity.

I'd say that you should probably take it barring something awesome. How far away is Tuscola from wherever-you-are-now?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 09, 2011, 06:48:33 PM
35 minutes from the far side of town. Door-to-door it'd be like, 45 minutes.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on April 09, 2011, 06:49:53 PM
being let go in two weeks
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 09, 2011, 07:48:27 PM
Can anyone tell me what accounting is like?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on April 09, 2011, 08:29:10 PM
Do you enjoy balancing your checkbook and do you actually know how to use Excel? If so, be an accountant.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 09, 2011, 09:01:10 PM
Do you enjoy being a scapegoat? Do you enjoy numbers running your life and people annoyed at you?
If so, start drinking now!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on April 09, 2011, 09:55:05 PM
Hey, I've been drinking all night! Guess I should be an accountant!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on April 09, 2011, 09:58:11 PM
I have a job, sort of.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 10, 2011, 02:49:54 AM
Accounting is a profession with a decent demand and pretty good average pay. By most accounts it is also incredibly boring and requires you to be quite carefully meticulous.

Your mileage may vary.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 10, 2011, 06:20:13 AM
Congratulations, R^2!

...sort of?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 10, 2011, 03:42:42 PM
Today at work was... interesting. Among various other unrelated episodes, the following happened at least once:

- Somebody played Deutschland Uber Alles
- Various acid trips were discussed
- The child molester dude from Family Guy was quoted several times
- A discussion on the relative merits of throwing each other under the bus to curry favour with management
- Tirade against gypsies
- The masons reared their heads again (there's a fellow there who is a big MASONIC NUTJOB)
- Someone spent a solid hour searching for "sexist TV commercials" on YouTube and watching the search results

I think I like the weekend shift, but it seems a tad... hazardous.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on April 10, 2011, 05:29:23 PM
Beware of the masons. They will use "THE KRAFT" on you. I'm pretty sure you can do better for yourself.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 10, 2011, 06:19:36 PM
In fairness, about half that stuff was done by only one guy. A big loud Romanian we have, nicknamed Sea Bass.

In addition to being a Mason (hardcore: he has the giant ring and everything. It's like a scene out of The Man Who Would Be King), he also gets daily reports on solar radiation and atmospheric strength though his ipad, so he knows when to protect his thoughts from damaging rays.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on April 10, 2011, 06:41:21 PM
First day at work. I'm exhausted, but: income!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 12, 2011, 05:16:06 PM
Made it past the 90-day mark today.

Now if they fire me for the usual blithering incompetence, I'll get two weeks severance at least! :imagination:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on April 12, 2011, 07:57:25 PM
As opposed to egregious blithering incompetence?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 13, 2011, 03:45:29 AM
I am capable of that too. We're professionals here, man! We offer failure suitable for everyone's budget.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on April 13, 2011, 04:33:49 AM
...send me your resume, sir!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 14, 2011, 03:14:29 PM
I just gave one of my unofficial-lackeys (I am unofficial-lead of two teams) a bunch of makework bullshit to do in order to just keep him out of my hair for the next two weeks and I'm sort of left here wondering when exactly I managed to become this guy.

...

And on that note, my other unofficial lackey just moved to another department, so there's an opening for Software Test Lackey again if anybody's interested.  Also three openings for web developer if you want a real job.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on April 14, 2011, 04:10:23 PM
I could take another crack at the app.  I'd have to move to LA, though, right?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 14, 2011, 04:16:52 PM
Technically he's in the greater LA sprawl, but I think Brent's further south - San Diego or roundabouts, right?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Sundae on April 14, 2011, 05:28:03 PM
Linton Kwesi Johnson - Inglan Is A Bitch (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zq9OpJYck7Y#)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 14, 2011, 06:28:37 PM
This is South Orange County.  Not at all like LA; most of the burgs down here usually show up in the various lists of the country's safest cities.

For example, I don't know how official this Neighborhood Scout (http://www.neighborhoodscout.com/neighborhoods/crime-rates/top100safest/) one is, but the city the job is in, Lake Forest, is #52.  The next city south is Mission Viejo at #53 (and north is Irvine, which is not listed but fairly clean, and notably is home to Blizzard Entertainment).

It's also pretty fuckspensive, but probably not as much as the areas of LA where you don't need to sleep with a knife under your pillow.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on April 14, 2011, 11:58:54 PM
If the salary's enough for the cost of living I'm down, though in my experience nobody in California wants an out-of-state applicant.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on April 15, 2011, 08:06:13 AM
I wonder why that would be?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 15, 2011, 07:53:02 PM
'cause livin' in SoCal ain't like dusting crops, kid.  It's kind of hard to stabilize yourself when you first move here unless you've got a network, otherwise you'll find that what you thought you could afford for rent will only get you a box.  A box made of asbestos.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on April 16, 2011, 06:21:20 AM
What's that flashing?!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 29, 2011, 05:22:26 AM
Work is going to be fun. My shift was cancelled yesterday because the power was knocked out, so I have to do a double-shift today.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on April 29, 2011, 06:13:06 AM
That's an... interesting way of handling scheduling.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 30, 2011, 06:56:12 AM
I found out yesterday that our district manager is named Peter Wanker.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 03, 2011, 02:54:10 PM
There's a new manager in my department.

His name is Ken Slaughter.

He's an Air Force veteran.

His last rank is Sergeant.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on May 03, 2011, 04:39:40 PM
...Brentai, I'd love to work where you work.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 06, 2011, 10:44:08 PM
Well, back to the on-two-weeks-off-two-weeks contract I've had going for the past couple of months.

We've reached crunch time, which means I get to deal with my absolute favorite type of boss neurosis, being constantly interrupted and told to drop everything and focus on some new emergency so that he can come back an hour later and ask me why I haven't finished the thing he told me to stop doing.

He actually told me to pick up the pace while we were walking down the hall.  As if my walking speed was going to make any detectable difference in whether we meet his deadline.

Fortunately he seemed to calm down a bit today, as the other temp and I caught up on the backlog and basically hit the usual status quo of "I can't copy files that haven't been uploaded to the server yet."

But the other thing is that while I was out they rearranged the furniture, and instead of having the laptops arranged in a circle around a room they're now sitting on three levels of shelves with no KVM, so I have to keep moving up and down.  So yesterday I spent a nine-and-a-half-hour work day basically doing squats all day and Jesus Christ I can feel it today.

Well, it beats unemployment.  In fact, I will be making nearly EIGHTY-TWO DOLLARS MORE this week than if I had just stayed home and collected unemployment.

Well, minus the $38 I wouldn't have spent gasing up my car.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on May 07, 2011, 06:08:40 AM
Got an invite to the job fair for a new Whole Foods store opening.  They're supposed to be insanely good to work for apparently!  And hell if nothing comes out of it, then worst case scenario is I remain at the job that I'm enjoying right now.  Win/win.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on May 07, 2011, 06:33:33 AM
The only downside I've heard to it is that whole foods is not up on those "unions".
Everything else I've heard implies this isn't particularly a problem?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on May 07, 2011, 10:32:47 AM
Well, as long as you're not fat.  Your pay scale is tied to your BMI.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on May 07, 2011, 07:04:04 PM
Then pray you don't work in the bakery.

Speaking of which, I actually dropped by to pick up my pay stub yesterday. I forgot that they were having a food safety inspection when I walked into the food preparation area in my street clothes.
 :nyoro~n:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on May 07, 2011, 07:35:23 PM
Well, as long as you're not fat.  Your pay scale is tied to your BMI.
Oh man I would make a billion dollars an hour there.

Anyway, I finally got some interviews for new jobs, and as it happens, the store I wanted to work at not only has a manager that loves me, but just cleared house and is hiring management. Assistant Managers there get guaranteed 30+ hours weeks and full medical / dental / optical.

My second interview for the position is with the district manager on Tuesday.

In the meantime I finally put in notice at my current job, and they seem to have decided if they can't have me no one will. I normally work one weeknight and a double every Saturday. This weekend I worked four to close through the second busiest night of the year during which we had a ninety head party where over a hundred people showed up on Friday. Today was opening to closing, with a moderately sized party during the day. Tomorrow is open to close and we're the only restaurant doing anything for Mother's Day.

At least I don't have to be conscious at all on Monday.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Glames on May 07, 2011, 08:50:06 PM
Oh man, what a rough long work-related day! The universe literally tried to beat me to a bloody pulp every which way imaginable but I dodged every bullet with skill and finesse. A display of professionalism even I can't deny and I usually don't impress myself that often because I'm not some cocky-douche. Ah, but sometimes I'm a douchey-cock! (But aren't we all sometimes? Yes, yes we are!)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on May 11, 2011, 07:30:41 AM
Annnnd I got it.  Part time to start, which means I can also keep my current job, and as far as I know part time still gets you benefits and paid time off down the line.  I'm pretty happy.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on May 11, 2011, 10:49:48 AM
Congratulations!
Now you will always smell like patchouli.

Win-win?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on May 11, 2011, 04:37:42 PM
more like always smell like the cleanest ocean breezes

that's what seafood department smells like right
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on May 11, 2011, 04:55:02 PM
Oh by the way guys, I start back at the theatre on Friday. I'm a projectionist again! Also this is the first job I've ever gotten simply because I'm bored out of my tits because I haven't done anything in so long.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on May 11, 2011, 05:04:28 PM
So how long before you start splicing in frames from porn?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on May 11, 2011, 05:17:26 PM
Never. The idea is kinda stupid, also I don't actually know how anyone would go about getting 35 MM frames of porn. I'm pretty sure almost all porn now a days is made digitally.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on May 11, 2011, 08:32:38 PM
You still use 35MM projectors? Weird.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on May 12, 2011, 04:22:12 AM
No. Anyone who thinks digital projecting is going to be anything but a very large very profitable theatre thing forever, has no idea how the industry works.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on May 12, 2011, 06:07:15 AM
Never. The idea is kinda stupid, also I don't actually know how anyone would go about getting 35 MM frames of porn. I'm pretty sure almost all porn now a days is made digitally.

I don't think Büge was seriously suggesting that you splice in frames from a porn into various G rated features
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on May 12, 2011, 06:59:33 AM
I don't either.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 12, 2011, 09:47:23 AM
I disagree.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 18, 2011, 09:55:07 PM
Got a six-month contract.

To check off the boxes for a sense of futility/lack of progress in my life, it is located 25 miles away from my current residence -- but literally right across the street from the apartment where I lived 5 years ago.  (Meaning that the next time Demogorgon posts a satellite photo of my location, he may finally be right!)

Hours are looking to be crummy, though as I've noted before graveyard isn't so bad when the daytime temperatures get up to 110.  It pays better than my last job, though I'm concerned the wear and tear on my car resulting from a 50-mile round trip every day as opposed to my previous 7 miles could make up the difference.

If nothing else, it's six months of steady income, which I could definitely use.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Verde on May 18, 2011, 10:28:11 PM
Heard back from my dream-job interview. They said it a was tough choice between me and somebody else but the other person had more experience. I was surprised I even came so close since I fluffed up the interview so much - I guess the fact that I turned every dumb thing I said into a joke turned out to be a better strategy than I thought. Anyway, they said there's a job coming up there that'd be ideal for me, so there's that.

In my current job, I spent the entirity of yesterday playing darts, minus a brief break to get insulted by a former customer over Twitter because he decided he hated me three years ago. I've usually got any number of small things to complain about in my job, but you know what? It's a pretty sweet gig really.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Malikial on May 20, 2011, 01:38:40 AM
Wednesday at 3 PM I made a couple of calls and what not to see about getting a job, Thursday at 2 PM I got a call and a job offer, well preliminary, I'll have to pass the normal background checks and drug tests, but it's a pretty good entry level management job. A bit of note: I have extensive previous management experience(retail and office/personnel management) and all the compliance certifications for fresh food and prepared food(I managed a fresh produce/deli/bakery area of a store for a year) so I can generally get jobs fast once I start trying. It'll be good to be pulling in money again.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 20, 2011, 05:27:34 AM
Now that you'll both be employed, you can reactivate your Wonder Twin powers!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on May 20, 2011, 07:43:22 PM
So not only is the store that I primarily work at going to be closing in a month, it will be closing entirely due to other peoples' stupidity.* AND they found a way to do it without giving us severance pay.

I am handling this remarkably well, considering that I am going to be hit the hardest.




*Blockbuster Canada is slowly going under because the Canadian branch had the entire 70 million dollar debt that the American branch accrued transferred over when The Dish Network bought them last month. The company is normally profitable, and now we can't find a buyer because of it. My store, specifically, is getting the axe because the company is currently being run by a financial advisor with no knowledge of the business. Despite doing amazingly per capita and having no local competition, we don't bring in the sheer amount of dollars that the other stores do.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 20, 2011, 08:14:09 PM
The real reason there are no takers is that the local video store distribution model is dying. It's all going to be on the Netflix model soon and the people with the wherewithal to purchase the company know that.

For what it's worth, legal video distribution is a fucking mess. Local stores like Blockbuster seem to carry nothing but recent arrivals and the absolute biggest movies. Netflix is a huge bandwidth hog at war with ISPs and (in Canada) doesn't have anything close to a full catalogue.

I know in my case, every time I get the urge to just watch some random movie from the 60's, 70's, or 80's, I can't find it anywhere without a ton of work.

Which usually means I don't watch it at all - you don't suddenly say "Hey let's watch [X]" on a given Friday, and then spend the next week days looking for a torrent/waiting for the download/fishing around indie movie stores/waiting for an Amazon purchase to arrive. You usually just give up instead. Well, Starr and I do.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Malikial on May 20, 2011, 08:51:13 PM
Well due to some shit politics at the place I was gonna get a job at I might not be working there... I'm going to a meeting on Tuesday to meet with people and decide. They took away their previous offer and offered me a different lower paying position but I dunno, I might still take it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 20, 2011, 10:37:50 PM
Awwwwww man. That's such garbage.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 24, 2011, 01:49:45 PM
Feel like they're already dicking me, and I haven't even started.

Last Tuesday my rep told me I was applying for a 4:30 PM - middle of the night shift.  Which isn't a great thing but which I'm prepared to do.

Last Wednesday he told me I'd gotten the position and they wanted me there on Monday at 7 AM for training.

On Friday he told me it wasn't going to be Monday but to keep Tuesday open; yesterday he told me it wouldn't be Tuesday but to keep Wednesday open.

Today he told me they want me in tomorrow at 6 AM.  Which will mean I pretty much need to get up at 4:30.  And he said after training is over -- and he doesn't know when that'll be -- I'll be going in at 3 AM.  When I asked about the 4:30 PM shift he said he wasn't sure but to ask about it.

Now look, I'm still a young man.  I can handle fluctuations in my sleep schedule (though they often give me migraines).  But I really would like to know what they're going to be from one day to the goddamn next, and for somebody to tell me what the fuck is going on at any given time.

There's still more information he needs to give me that he hasn't yet.  It is nearly 3 PM.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on May 24, 2011, 01:59:37 PM
Turns out the Radio Shack job I was laid off from last year was actually an involuntary termination, in the official record keeping system.  I've been 'courting' the manager who hired me and sent me to the store I worked for to rehire me.  This comes up, and it turns out I'm un-rehire-able.  So I call the district manager for the area for a "What's the dilly-o?", and he comes back, saying that the manager (who's still with the company but at the corporate department) did the paperwork wrong, and there should be no problem with me coming back to RS.  So he's doing things to send up the HR chain to get the un-rehire-able status revoked, to allow me to compete for the job.  So, things ARE looking up, despite the rest of the paragraph.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Malikial on May 24, 2011, 05:51:12 PM
Went to job interview for lesser job, was polite, spoke well. They were like, "Well thanks for coming in but this is all we can offer you..."















































Then four hours later I get a phone call, they offered me the original higher paying position again. This time for reals, I guess they talked it over within their office or something. New job get.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on May 24, 2011, 05:56:42 PM
gratz
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on May 24, 2011, 06:01:19 PM
Restaurant is closing on Saturday.
It'll be my last day employed until we build a new store. I'm going to almost full time to unemployed to running a restaurant.
HOPEFULLY by July I'll be back working. Hopefully.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 24, 2011, 09:39:06 PM
ENJOY THE SUMMER.

EDIT: OR ELSE.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on May 24, 2011, 09:54:00 PM
NO U.


In a more mature fashion: What summer? Being broke and stuck at home is awful especially if you genuinely like working. And I definitely can't afford a vacation for more than a day or two. And that's pushing it.

Anyway, the time I have off is too much time not to have a job, but not enough for me to get a job. So yeah, I'll just sit around the house in my underwear all day for a month, but all the fun will be sucked out of it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on May 24, 2011, 10:57:46 PM
Emulate the CLASSICS you never got around to emulating.
Hint hint.


I'm saying you should play Master of Magic. Like a cad.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 25, 2011, 04:43:46 PM
Well, when I figured taking a job across the street from my old apartment meant stepping backward into 2006, I was off by a decade.  I have stumbled upon the secret dumping ground for the kids from my high school computer class.

One of them I recognize but didn't really know.  The other is a guy who I would describe as my first object lesson in the No Asshole Rule.  He says he has no memory of me whatsoever, which is entirely consistent with his drug use at the time I knew him.  He seems like less of an asshole, though he insulted the guy who's training me for no good reason, which suggests to me that he's at least still an ass.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on May 25, 2011, 04:45:14 PM
Yo, Thad!  What's the Mesa, AZ area like?  The job recruiter sent me a req for an aircraft job out that way.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on May 25, 2011, 05:03:09 PM
I almost caused a fight at work today!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 25, 2011, 07:14:12 PM
It's the third-biggest city in the state, and is predominantly Mormon but features some impressive barrios too.  The Mormon part is responsible for a significant amount of the state's crazy, including Senator Russell Pearce.

But it's adjacent to Tempe, my home and the major college town, which I happen to quite like even though there are lots of places I'd rather live.  Partly due to the fact that today's high temperature was 96 and we are still nearly a month away from the beginning of summer.

Work is work, and if you come out here I'll buy you a beer.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on May 26, 2011, 05:58:14 AM
I'd accept that beer handily.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on June 05, 2011, 05:51:19 AM
You know what the upside to being imminently laid off is? I can be a complete asshole to the handful of people who deserve it.

Can you tell that I'm having fun you guys?


oh also I kind of have a guaranteed job for the later part of the summer and on
It's a call center job but it pays a lot and it's about as close as Blockbuster was. I know a few people who've worked there for ages and are well-liked and they all said they'd let me use them as references. They usually hire around August or so.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 05, 2011, 04:46:36 PM
You decided to stay then, I gather?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on June 05, 2011, 06:08:15 PM
For the time being. I'm definitely moving, but thinking ahead, this probably isn't a good time. It's the guaranteed job come August that made it for me.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on June 05, 2011, 06:12:51 PM
The state of Illinois is failing to live up to their pension promises to a huge swath of their employees.

Something to think about.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 05, 2011, 06:26:35 PM
For the time being. I'm definitely moving, but thinking ahead, this probably isn't a good time. It's the guaranteed job come August that made it for me.

Oh is the job in Fredericton? Sorry, I thought you meant it was close to where you are now. :P
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on June 05, 2011, 06:28:54 PM
It is. I mean I'll get it and then leave when I'm good and ready rather than being rushed into it.

(and when I say close I mean like 200 feet from here. Almost as close as Blockbuster was. It's incredibly fortunate)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 05, 2011, 08:14:32 PM
Okay, that makes sense now.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on June 06, 2011, 09:09:05 PM
I submitted my resume to the place next door a few weeks ago. I figured they weren't going to bother, but today I got a call. I aced the interview questions. Next is a brief online thing and then an actual interview.

So in all likelihood I'll get another job literally nextdoor to the place that's closing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on June 07, 2011, 05:54:11 AM
 :perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 07, 2011, 05:26:32 PM
Looks like they're tossing me off weekends for random blocks of weeks. This is a loss of pay, increased hassle, longer hours (indirectly), far less sleep (and poorer quality sleep too), more work and generally affects everything badly. Scoring perpetual weekends was the single biggest thing that made the job tolerable.

Oh well, it was inevitable. Sooner or later everyone figures out that I'm just a giant useless sack of shit pretending to be a real employee. After all, "Fake it 'till you make it" only works if you can eventually make it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on June 07, 2011, 08:28:05 PM
(http://www.corporate-sellout.com/trinity/brent.gif) Greetings. I am Brentai Roberts. I tried to piss on your window a couple of weeks ago, but I was too drunk and ended up urinating on the bagel shop several lots down instead. Point being, I want a job.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on June 09, 2011, 04:10:16 AM
It's official: Store closes on Saturday. It's gonna' be sad to see it go.

So yesterday I bought the last of what I wanted to own and made myself a gag account to use if I ever go to a Blockbuster in another city.

"Baron Von Skullcrusher". Mailing address: "Peak Of The Forsaken Mountain".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on June 09, 2011, 10:52:54 AM
Man, I wish I had done something like that when I still worked at blockbuster.

Oh well.  I still have my card with my old employee number, issued in...*gag* 1999.

I'm going to be 28 next month.

In other news, I drove 3 hours last night, stayed overnight, and interviewed this morning for a Lockheed Martin position as an electronics test tech.  It was fascinating as I got to see a lot of the manufacturing processes.

I feel really good about this interview!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on June 09, 2011, 12:46:45 PM
My goal for the three-week break before the summer quarter starts is to find a job I can actually, you know, live off of. Not one that cuts my hours to ten per week making me move in with family, not one that dries up entirely after two months.

I have to call a guy back tomorrow, have a lead to follow up on, and have a phone interview Monday. So, uh, we'll see.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on June 11, 2011, 05:35:59 PM
So the store finally closed tonight. As sad as it is to see it go, I got paid for doing absolutely nothing for twelve hours (best part was playing Pokémon against a coworker four or five times) and all of the unsold candy, DVDs with no cover art, and toys, electronics, and supplies went to the staff. It was like Halloween except I also got about thirty movies. :whoops:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on June 13, 2011, 08:20:59 AM
My phone interview went well! I have a followup in-person interview scheduled.

In July.

For a place that opens in September.

That is not as helpful as I was hoping!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 13, 2011, 05:53:51 PM
Talked to my boss today. Confirmed that I am being denied the ability to trade shifts (something everyone else has by default), even though I want the shifts that are widely considered shitty by most of the employees because my production rates are so low you couldn't find them on a spreadsheet of the Marianas Trench.

Played every card I had - good, legit arguments - for allowing me to stay on weekends. Even my last ace, when I lampshaded my own sleep issues and all but begged. No dice, I need too much remediation.

Ten thirty-two years of incompetence at each and every thing I have ever set my hand or mind to.

(http://daniel.calcified.net/baddyav.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on June 13, 2011, 05:58:23 PM
Those war terrain thingies are freaking sweet!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on June 13, 2011, 06:02:30 PM
Not exactly my job, but: tonight, at work, my friend met and got a hug from Aretha Franklin.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 13, 2011, 06:24:12 PM
Fuck, that's awesome.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on June 14, 2011, 07:12:45 AM
Man, I wish I had done something like that when I still worked at blockbuster.

Oh well.  I still have my card with my old employee number, issued in...*gag* 1999.

I'm going to be 28 next month.

In other news, I drove 3 hours last night, stayed overnight, and interviewed this morning for a Lockheed Martin position as an electronics test tech.  It was fascinating as I got to see a lot of the manufacturing processes.

I feel really good about this interview!

Called my HR rep for Lockheed, he said I was a strong candidate.  I should know something definite either this week or early next week!

Current Mood: cautiously optimistic?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on June 14, 2011, 07:54:28 AM
Just spent my last dollar on quality paper to print resumes and portfolios on.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on June 16, 2011, 04:56:38 AM
Convinced this lady to upgrade from a 16GB flash drive to a 2TB USB 3.0 compatible External HDD and get the extended warranty on it.

Bender the Magnificent (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TlBwngggJrs#ws)




Oh also I have a job interview today. I have had three job interviews in my life; I have had three job offers in my life. I am going for a fourth.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on June 16, 2011, 07:29:30 AM
I have run out of Good Leads, so everything I do from here will be cold-calling. I've never gotten a job from a cold call in my life.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on June 16, 2011, 07:34:21 AM
To be fair, it can't be much worse than your record for Good Leads!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on June 17, 2011, 11:52:57 AM
Job Offer GET!!

Ode To Joy (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xpcUxwpOQ_A#ws)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 18, 2011, 04:29:40 PM
One of my co-workers (a good guy) was investigating a case today involving a real bitch trying to claim her old deadbeat accounts were fraud (they weren't).

In telling us about the case he was describing how all her accounts were calling the exact same numbers, including a porn chat line.

"So yeah, she's even calling the same numbers. I pointed this out, and she said anybody could have called that. It's an 'adult entertainment' line. She was telling the truth - I even called it and checked!"
"So what you're saying is, you called a porno line from your work phone?"
"Oh that's going to be fun to explain."

:glee: 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on June 23, 2011, 09:40:55 AM
So I go into work this morning, sit down at my desk, and find that my login isn't working.

I ask the guy I've been working with to see what's up.  He mumbles that he'll check on it, then walks away.

He comes back and tells me that he's talked to our boss and she said I need to take my key card to the security desk and call my rep at the temp agency.

It bears repeating at this point that I have just driven 30 miles and it is now 6 AM.

Haven't called my rep yet -- figured that after getting up at 4:30 I could use a nap -- but I most definitely did not have any unnoticed messages from him in my VM or inbox.

I'll call him a little later, when I figure out just the right way to articulate "This is the most unprofessional thing I have ever seen.  Now do you have another job for me?"
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on June 23, 2011, 10:36:16 AM
Dear Whoever Made This Website:

This application is all on one page. It takes about twenty minutes to fill out, because Every Goddamned Thing is a required field.

Do not log me out for inactivity because I am not requesting new pages from your server quickly enough.

Go Fuck Yourself Sincerely,
R2
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on June 23, 2011, 11:54:18 AM
Rep says the reason he didn't call is because HE didn't find out about it until 8 o'clock this morning.

And that apparently I lost the job because I was too focused on getting the job done and not enough on bullshitting with the managers I talked to on the phone.

Something which, of course, nobody ever actually said anything to me about.

Fuck 'em all sideways.  I knew it was a shit job but I never realized I was working for such shit people.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 23, 2011, 12:54:26 PM
Goddamn. That's garbage, Thad.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 23, 2011, 01:05:26 PM
Perspective is worth a thousand bucks.  Sorry you had to be the ass that makes everybody else feel better (instead of R2 for once).

I have some job leads outsde of my current company for PHP doods but they all share the same fatal flaw of being in goddam California.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on June 23, 2011, 01:31:39 PM
Perspective is worth a thousand bucks.

If that were true I'd be a rich man.

Sorry you had to be the ass that makes everybody else feel better (instead of R2 for once).

What really gets me is the total lack of communication.  I have never in my life worked a job where a boss had a problem with something I was doing and just straight-up fired me instead of saying a single goddamn word to me about it.  (Unless being an admin on Pyoko counts.)

I really can't begin to imagine where the gain is in having to train a new guy instead of just talking to me and suggesting maybe I should be spending more time talking about the weather.  Because I can spend a LOT of goddamn time talking about the weather.  It's 111 degrees out right now.  Can you believe that shit?

I have some job leads outsde of my current company for PHP doods but they all share the same fatal flaw of being in goddam California.

Worth a look.  I was talking to a company in Austin about a Linux SysAdmin job recently, but that broke down when it became clear that the reason a company in Austin is advertising Linux SysAdmin jobs in Phoenix is that nobody in Austin will accept the rate they're offering.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on June 29, 2011, 07:29:26 PM
I got the most promising conclusion to a job interview yet!  :glee:

It was "We'll let you know in a week if we want you to come in and start work in August."  ::(:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on June 30, 2011, 09:49:46 PM
Welp, new contract.  Same shitty commute, less shitty hours (though those come with shittier traffic), same adequate pay.  On the whole it seems like about a half-step up, based on the strong statistical improbability that the working environment is as bad as the last place.

Only a short-term thing, but at least this time that's not going to be a surprise!  Which also means the agency is already feeling around for my next assignment.

Worked for a half-day earlier in the week.  The upshot is that I'm once again trapped in the middle of the donut hole where I am making no money tomorrow because it's just coming out of my unemployment check.  Fucking Arizona.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 02, 2011, 11:28:52 AM
Went to the Farmer's Market today to do some grocery shopping for my mother.

It was the busiest I've ever seen it (being a) a Saturday b) on a holiday weekend). There were three or four food vendor carts set up, including a truck selling -- of all things -- Belgian waffles.

And a line five or six people deep every time I walked by.

Now see, being almost all the way through culinary school has given me a little bit of insight. I know about how much it costs to run a food truck, overall. I know about how much investment in ingredients it takes to make a waffle. And I know how much profit is made when you sell said waffle out of said food truck for $3.50 a pop.

My irises may have turned into dollar signs for a moment there. Jealous, jealous dollar signs.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on July 02, 2011, 08:19:36 PM
Huh.

I just got offered money to write erotic fiction.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on July 02, 2011, 08:30:34 PM
Ooh.  Details?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on July 02, 2011, 09:47:54 PM
Not for free anymore, TA.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 03, 2011, 12:41:07 AM
You are obviously going to go for it, right?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on July 13, 2011, 07:29:38 AM
So I know we have a lot of people looking for jobs, and maybe some looking for something better. I figure I'd share this:

http://www.reddit.com/r/forhire/ (http://www.reddit.com/r/forhire/)

It's a decent number of tech jobs, with a mix of other things.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on July 14, 2011, 08:36:44 PM
I get some real choice customers at my store. I think I've talked about the guy in the motor wheelchair with lobotomy scars and Marty Feldman eyes who always begs for cookies before.

Today, I'm going to talk about Skeezix.

I dunno if that's his real name and frankly, the less I know about Skeezix the better. He's one of the scummiest people I've ever had to deal with. I know you shouldn't judge people and stuff, but man, this guy. First of all is his appearance. He's always, always, wearing a hooded sweater, partly zipped up, without a shirt underneath. And it's always the same goddamn hoodie. I have this horrible feeling that it's the only shirt he wears, and he just doesn't bother while he's at home. I presume he doesn't have a job, because he just oozes casual apathy. His hair is greasy-looking and long. I'd say the person he resembles most would be The Jesus from The Big Lebowski, but without the fashion sense.

Second is the smell. Every time, every goddamn time he comes in, he stinks to high heaven, like he schedules his showers weekly. I'm not kidding when I say I hold my breath whenever he approaches. I bet he'd qualify as ascetic if it wasn't for the crap he eats. Which leads me to point three.

Skeezix always getting the same crap every time he comes in. Pizza, pies, cake. Oh, and it's not just any food. See, at my store, we mark down anything that expires the next day to 50%. He always arrives in the evening and lurks around the bakery and deli, just waiting for us to mark down something. He used to bother us ahead of time to mark stuff down, but that was before I knew that our policy was not to do that (otherwise we'd have everybody begging us to mark down stuff). One the ladies in deli actually caught Skeezix trying to switch markdown tags to get something for even cheaper.

The guy's a goddamn walking stereotype: Skeezix would be the shifty-eyed scumbag henchman who got his comeuppance at the end of the movie.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on July 15, 2011, 09:02:28 AM
Hey, dudes!  Sorry I dropped off the face of the planet for a while.  Didn't have the cable set up in my new apartment, but I'm going now!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on July 15, 2011, 09:11:31 AM
Good! Get over to Talking Time so we can continue our EDH game!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on July 15, 2011, 10:20:27 AM
You're a slowpoke, Slowpoke!  That was one of the first things I did! >:(
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 19, 2011, 06:25:34 PM
So my three-day-a-week class this quarter is A la Carte and Dining Room Service, or As Close To Working In An Actual Restaurant As We Can Make It.

Tonight was our first night for actual people-come-in-and-dine service. I worked the salad and soup station.

I'm so awesome at it I was training other people to do it half an hour in.

So uh

why am I unemployed again? ::(:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on July 19, 2011, 08:34:44 PM
Welp, Windows 7 deployment time.

They brought on a team of 3 temps to install the computers overnight, and me to deal with the users the next morning.

2 of the 3 people on the night shift got fired after their first night.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Dooly on July 20, 2011, 12:44:48 AM
For what, exactly?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on July 20, 2011, 09:01:59 AM
Wild office sexnannigans?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on July 20, 2011, 04:26:22 PM
I don't know that they were fucking, but whatever the hell they were doing, they weren't setting up properly-configured Windows 7 workstations.

Today was much the hell better; not only did they keep the one competent person on the team, they put her in charge.

Which is good news because as of tomorrow I'm pretty much on my own as far as finalizing the installs; the guy I've been working with for the past few weeks is going on leave.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on July 21, 2011, 11:18:35 AM
This morning I was troubleshooting a computer.  The user mentioned that another tech had already run something on it.

I said, "Was it about a fifteen-minute filecopy?"

She responded, "I'm an underwriter; I don't really understand the IT stuff."

Guys, I do not know how to dumb down "fifteen-minute filecopy" any further.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 21, 2011, 11:21:09 AM
"Did they spend about fifteen minutes copying a file?"
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 21, 2011, 11:24:42 AM
Oh man, that reminds me. Some nob at work issued a decree last month that the customer service grunts can't call customers "Angry" or "Irate" or whatever in their case notes anymore. Instead, the word they must use is "Passionate" (our dept is under no such decree).

Yep.

So now we see notes on accounts like "Explained all charges on customer's bill. Customer then became very passionate." or "Customer is extremely passionate and will not wait much longer for the tech to arrive on site."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on July 21, 2011, 11:48:22 AM
This is the plot of most solo porn movies.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on July 21, 2011, 12:38:13 PM
Friday was becoming very passionate because Brentai kept ripping off her clothes.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on July 21, 2011, 01:11:37 PM
"Did they spend about fifteen minutes copying a file?"

Well yes, that's pretty much how I repeated it.  But that is not additional dumbing-down; it is the exact same words put in a slightly different order.

Thing is that this wasn't somebody in her fifties; she's probably younger than I am.  (This leads me to wonder if perhaps a day will come when users stop suggesting that they don't know as much about computers as I do because they're so old and start suggesting that they don't know as much about computers as I do because they're so young.  Alternately, I could be the out-of-touch oldster who doesn't know how to operate a smartphone.  Or both, assuming we live in a world that still has both desktop computers and smartphones a few decades down the line.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 22, 2011, 05:47:47 AM
This isn't a job interview, it's an "information session". I'm one of two dozen people corraled into a hotel conference room waiting for whatever an "information session" is to start. From the general ambiance I feel like selling me timeshares might factor in somewhere.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on July 22, 2011, 08:43:44 AM
So apparently whoever was in charge of locking up last night did not get the memo that people were going to be working here, and turned off the A/C.

The night crew did their best to power through it but only finished 3 machines before having to pack it in and go home.  So that's a whole day's work down the tubes.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lady Duke on July 25, 2011, 12:14:04 PM
I am consistently amazed by the amount of white trash assholes who come into this store with terrible shit they like to say is antique and in great condition.  Or better still, when they bring in beaten-up electronics for us to put on eBay that they insist is in new condition, despite being used and showing obvious signs of wear.  Fucking stop buying your god damn packs or cigarettes and maybe you'd have a little more money--I don't want to hear your sob story about how you never have enough money for gasoline or anything, because you waste it on stupid terrible habits and drugs.  Good god. 

It is a daily story, and sometimes it's sad, but most of the time, you can tell from the look of the person (and usually they are a young person or a middle-aged druggie) that they did a lot of stupid things to get themselves into a worse situation than they probably started in.  And I hate them even more when they don't know what they've brought in so it's pretty clear they probably stole whatever it is anyway.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 25, 2011, 06:31:31 PM
Yeah, anyone desperate enough to sell off their worldly possessions is obviously feeding a drug habit.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on July 25, 2011, 06:45:18 PM
ohhhh, lady duke got POVER-TOLD
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on July 26, 2011, 10:48:07 AM
So speaking of poverty:

Remember how I got laid off early last month? Guess what. I still haven't gotten any employment insurance. Blockbuster has been massively incompetent with their layoffs, doing things like not sending me my Record Of Employment until more than a month after being laid off, sending it to the wrong address, and putting the wrong date on it. One of my coworkers lost his house and is likely to lose his car because he can't make payments on it.
Staples, on the other hand, has just been opaque. I had to double or triple check with Service Canada to make sure that what I needed from them was a record of employment before they actually decided to request me one.

The good news is I might actually get the severance pay I was cheated out of through the wage earner protection program! The bad news is it looks like I require a confirmation number that I would have gotten when I filled out the form. Unfortunately, I have no idea where I put it or what it looks like. Also it will probably severely fuck with my EI if I get $1700 in my bank account at once.

I should go submit some more resumes. :T
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on July 26, 2011, 10:58:21 AM
(http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y88/cubanlinx/frogurt.jpg)

The Employment Insurance is also cursed.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 26, 2011, 11:05:07 AM
"Hi, is [kitchen manager] in? I had a 2:00 interview yesterday but she was too busy, so I was told to come back today."
"Sure, just a second."
...
"Hey, I don't have another manager here until 3:00. I won't have any time until 3:15 at earliest."
"THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE SCHEDULED TWO FUCKING 2:00 INTERVIEWS Okay see you at 3:15."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lady Duke on July 26, 2011, 01:40:12 PM
Yeah, anyone desperate enough to sell off their worldly possessions is obviously feeding a drug habit.

Lol except when these people I'm mentioning are actual drug addicts known around town, and also young people I know my cousin does drugs with.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 27, 2011, 07:15:22 AM
Job fair at school today.

My classes start half an hour in.

Here goes nothin'.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on July 27, 2011, 10:25:00 AM
hey r^2 have you ever tried not being so entitled and maybe getting a fucking worth ethic (http://eater.com/archives/2011/07/22/hot-topics-4.php) you piece of shit druggie
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on July 27, 2011, 12:59:49 PM
I don't know what's worse. The comments or the article. Also, I'd say the only guy who had it right was Yoon. Fuck the rest of them.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 27, 2011, 02:04:05 PM
I guess next time I redo my resume I should throw in that I don't want to be a celebrity chef and I'm actually cooking because I like to.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 27, 2011, 02:06:57 PM
Oh and "job fair" = five companies, two of which wanted fashion students. They gave me a three-page printout of culinary job leads when I got there. Thirty seconds later I'd marked all of the places I hadn't applied yet. There were two.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on July 27, 2011, 02:44:48 PM
NOW YOU KNOW WHERE THE JOBS ARE  :derp:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 27, 2011, 02:56:45 PM
Places I've applied that don't want to hire me? I knew that already.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 27, 2011, 04:35:29 PM
R^2, I really hate to break it to you, but you are unemployed because you are doing things wrong.

You are not a chef.

You are a cartoonist who likes to cook. Draw more comics. If you are looking for a subject, how about an unemployed culinary student trying to find a job?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on July 27, 2011, 04:42:05 PM
Really I figured R2's problem is more that he IS a chef in a region that considers chicken 'n grits fine dining.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 27, 2011, 07:40:59 PM
Graphic arts was two career-shifts ago, not counting the occasional slumming in deadend bullshit that had me returning to college and switching to culinary school in the first place.

And yeah, Nashville is a decade or two behind culinary trends... And that's the trendy places.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Envy on July 27, 2011, 07:42:38 PM
What if R^2 can make the classiest Chicken 'n grits around.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 27, 2011, 07:45:25 PM
Then he can make minimum wage in a State in The South. Which would be a significant step up!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 27, 2011, 07:52:52 PM
Actually I make fantastic fried chicken. And grits. Or polenta, if you're feeling classy.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on July 27, 2011, 08:13:47 PM
You can buy polenta in big tubes like cookie dough here. I never know what to do with it though.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 27, 2011, 08:23:21 PM
what tubes why would you I don't even

Slice it and fry it. Polenta cakes are a substitute for potatoes or rice as a meal starch. Slice it thin and fry it crispy and it makes good chips to eat with soups or suchlike.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on July 27, 2011, 08:28:51 PM
Of course! It's so obvious!

Thanks, R^2. I'll forward a recommendation for you.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 27, 2011, 08:41:16 PM
My Southern fry-everything instincts win out again!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on July 27, 2011, 10:07:37 PM
Really I figured R2's problem is more that he IS a chef in a region that considers chicken 'n grits fine dining.

WOAH WOAH WOAH NOW HOLD THE PHONE. Are you saying you have a problem with chicken and grits?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 28, 2011, 07:27:44 AM
In class today, I'm finishing a tuna tartare with a lemon vinaigrette; searing halibut and plating it with braised fennel and swiss chard in a cardamom sauce, braising rabbit and plating it with a bean puree and ginger sauce, and frosting a chocolate cake with ganache and serving it with toasted-almond ice cream.

Part of my grade will be on how attractively I can plate these items to make them look contemporary and elegant.

Tomorrow I am eating with my father and his wife, probably at a local meat-n-three where choices of entree range from meatloaf to pork chops and vegetables vary between "mashed", "deep-fried", and "stewed with fatback".

I'm not saying the latter option is bad* we're just talking about two very different levels here.

* - Except possibly in the sense that if you eat this way your whole life you may very well die of heart disease by age forty.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 28, 2011, 07:58:31 AM
My Southern fry-everything instincts win out again!

I made a flowchart! If you want to cook like you're from the American south:

(http://www.intentionallyblank.net/images/southerncooking.PNG)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on July 28, 2011, 09:02:08 AM
vegetables vary between "mashed", "deep-fried", and "stewed with fatback".

Really? They don't come in "pickled" or "boiled grey"?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on July 28, 2011, 10:04:40 AM
What are you, English?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on July 28, 2011, 10:26:01 AM
Worse.



Canadian.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 28, 2011, 11:33:15 AM
Canadians could have had American technology, British culture, and French cuisine. Instead they ended up with American culture, French technology, and British cuisine.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 28, 2011, 07:03:30 PM
That is... accurate.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: teg on August 02, 2011, 05:12:05 PM
Quote from: Captain's Log, Stardate 08022011
samus_aran: -customer calls on the phone around eight
samus_aran: -says she has some copies to do
samus_aran: -I tell her the approximate cost and what time we close at
samus_aran: -she comes in fifteen minutes before closing with 160 copies to be done (note that she only gives them to me a few at a time, so I think it can be done in time)
Ada Bee: oh boy, here we go
samus_aran: -pages are all different sizes; some are bent or torn in half and very easily jammed; one is an entire newspaper page that must be carefully aligned
samus_aran: -it takes more than half an hour to finish the job; the toner runs out at least once and asking my manager for help changing it gets me nowhere fast
samus_aran: -finally finish this huge fucking order, still with my own closing duties to be done. Other staff are waiting to go home.
samus_aran: -she complains about the price
samus_aran: She was one more insulting comment away from me answering her by saying "well, since this isn't satisfactory I'll just shred these and you can go to a different store"
samus_aran: And then actually doing it.




Also I finally submitted my record of employment, so I should have an income again soon. And tomorrow I'm going to meet with the guy in the apartment downstairs, who does some sort of home call center gig that nets him 12.50 an hour.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on August 02, 2011, 06:28:49 PM
Quote from: Captain's Log, Stardate 08022011
samus_aran: -customer calls on the phone around eight
samus_aran: -says she has some copies to do
samus_aran: -I tell her the approximate cost and what time we close at
samus_aran: -she comes in fifteen minutes before closing with 160 copies to be done (note that she only gives them to me a few at a time, so I think it can be done in time)
Ada Bee: oh boy, here we go
samus_aran: -pages are all different sizes; some are bent or torn in half and very easily jammed; one is an entire newspaper page that must be carefully aligned
samus_aran: -it takes more than half an hour to finish the job; the toner runs out at least once and asking my manager for help changing it gets me nowhere fast
samus_aran: -finally finish this huge fucking order, still with my own closing duties to be done. Other staff are waiting to go home.
samus_aran: -she complains about the price
samus_aran: She was one more insulting comment away from me answering her by saying "well, since this isn't satisfactory I'll just shred these and you can go to a different store"
samus_aran: And then actually doing it.
Ada Bee: "I ask the lady what her novel's called, since it seems so goddamn important that she's gotta keep me past closing to copy it, and she says 'THE ARISTOCRATS!'"




Also I finally submitted my record of employment, so I should have an income again soon. And tomorrow I'm going to meet with the guy in the apartment downstairs, who does some sort of home call center gig that nets him 12.50 an hour.

Next time, post the whole thing, you knob.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 02, 2011, 07:23:38 PM
Probably-unpaid stage on Friday.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Envy on August 02, 2011, 07:31:58 PM
So I've been at my job for 3 weeks, and it turns out my Co-Workers are awesome. I was kind of half expecting some punks that don't wanna work. Well that turned around as I got to know them. They all work pretty hard. My boss is pretty amazing, she gave me my requested days off with no question. I'm getting about 30+ hours a week too. All in all I'm pretty happy even if it's fast food. It's going to last me for awhile till I get back on track.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on August 02, 2011, 10:04:09 PM
So, on the same day that the three biggest local police departments decided to have  this (http://lacrossetribune.com/tomahjournal/news/local/article_290f9a80-b8b7-11e0-a1c2-001cc4c002e0.html) get together in our town, some dude decides to escape police  custody (http://lacrossetribune.com/article_4e684e9a-bd84-11e0-9d17-001cc4c03286.html). The police used our theatre parking lot as their base of operations while looking for him. Two helicopters, two swat armored cars, at least two dozen police cars. It was wild :D I guess they went a little overboard, but they had like every non-essential emergency vehicle and personnel in the surrounding 200 miles at their disposal.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on August 04, 2011, 10:13:30 AM
After month of working nights I've switched for at least this week to working morning shifts.  Man, as long as I can properly teach myself that 10pm is the new 1am, these hours RULE.  5am to 1pm, and for once I have a nice long stretch of the day where I can do whatever the fuck I want.  And as a bonus, assistant manager today was all like "man you did a good job, I need to ask them to keep you on mornings."  :perfect:

It's also really nice because mornings are basically like, four hours of setup with very few interruptions, which means once the day really "starts" I'm halfway done.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 04, 2011, 04:02:39 PM
I got a job offer! It is for a good company in a good position for good pay in a terrible location and at the worst possible time!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on August 04, 2011, 04:44:45 PM
I got a job offer! It is for a good company in a good position for good pay in a terrible location and at the worst possible time!

 :slow:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 05, 2011, 11:21:43 AM
So after a year of hunting and several months out of work, I got TWO job offers at the same time. [spoiler](There's a river.)[/spoiler]

So I'm doing prep work on the weekends at an Italian place until the aforementioned line cook job needs me next month. I'm kind of surprised the owner of the Italian place agreed to take me in and train me knowing I'm gong to leave, but I guess I'm buying him a little time to find a permanent person to do my job. :shrug:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on August 05, 2011, 11:24:27 AM
YAY

 :perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 05, 2011, 11:28:46 AM
There's a tentative HOORAY CONGRATS for you, R^2.

I will however refrain from throwing a beer party until you actually have the first paycheque in your bank account.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on August 05, 2011, 11:44:35 AM
two people called in sick today

this is your doing isn't it r^2
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on August 05, 2011, 05:29:10 PM
So yesterday I got a cold E-Mail from a recruiter who'd seen my resume and was looking for a PHP dev.  I told her I was interested and sent her a current resume.

Today I got her response; she told me who the client is.

The client is the company that fired me last month.

I considered telling her to submit me just to see what would happen.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on August 05, 2011, 05:44:01 PM
 :perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 05, 2011, 08:32:49 PM
Ah, the answer to my previous befuddlement is "He's not going to train me at all". So I'm getting major flashbacks to working for the pizza place, but eh. I made nearly $90 and got two meals today. I'm cheap and easy.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 05, 2011, 08:55:55 PM
So yesterday I got a cold E-Mail from a recruiter who'd seen my resume and was looking for a PHP dev.  I told her I was interested and sent her a current resume.

Today I got her response; she told me who the client is.

The client is the company that fired me last month.

I considered telling her to submit me just to see what would happen.

Dooooooooooooooooooooooooo it
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 05, 2011, 09:21:48 PM
Dooooooooooooooooooooooooo it

(http://i630.photobucket.com/albums/uu23/Bon_Bon_2009/scruffy-1.jpg)

Also, hooray for R^2 cooking up some mean mudcrab legs.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on August 07, 2011, 08:01:18 PM
I also got a job offer this weekend! Technically, it was on Friday, but whatevs.

I did two phone interviews in between helping some other soldiers put up tents, unload cots, and move tables in the rain, so when the first manager asked me how I was doing, I responded, "Well, I'm standing in a field, soaking wet and covered in mud, but other than that, I'm pretty good." The rest of the interview went just as well as you'd expect.

I did the second interview right afterward(she literally just handed the phone to the other manager), and I rocked that one too! The second manager told me they would be making a decision soon, and would be making calls later that day.

15 minutes later, she called me and said, "I'm tired of being nice, so I'm just going to ask you. Do you want the job?"

So, I'll be working for Walmart again(boo), catching shoplifters again(yay), a job I am surprisingly great at, making decent pay(not sure about an exact figure, but last time I started at 11.50 an hour) and working with three people with whom I get along amazingly.

On the other job front, I spent the rest of the weekend trying to juggle getting a battalion's worth of soldiers to fill out their paperwork properly, trying to get my own paperwork done, then doing about four hours of drunkenly umpiring a softball game(including a very strange attempt at intimidation from the First Sergeant/pitcher for the rival team, in which he informed me that he could pitch a softball 10 feet high), five or so hours of sleep in a hot, humid building shared by about 200 other soldiers, eating a nasty breakfast, powering through a hangover to finish doing my own paperwork/getting others' paperwork fixed, and finally, once everything was done, being told by my own sleep-deprived First Sergeant that I had done an amazing job, and that she was going to put me in for an award. Also, I found out that I qualify for 5 years of free health care through the VA. Oh, and I might be making Sergeant soon, assuming my packet didn't fall through the cracks; I'll know more about that later this week.

tl;dr: Best/worst weekend ever.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on August 08, 2011, 11:16:47 AM
This is my last week on the current contract.

Luckily the agency really came through for me this time and got me a new gig starting Monday.  It's still the same desktop support crap I've been doing for nearly 3 years now, but they're sticking "Senior" in front of my title and adding a buck an hour to my pay.  And it's a one-year contract and my new commute will be roughly half the distance of my current one, which in itself adds up to about $15 less a week I'll be spending on gas.

So pretty much it's not what I really want but it's a step up in every immediately-visible way.

I'm still gun-shy about job security, and "one-year contract" doesn't mean much more than the paper it's written on to a guy who just got fired one month into a six-month contract, but still, it's good news.  Particularly as it comes right as my GF's drastically scaling back her hours to focus on going to school full-time.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on August 09, 2011, 11:30:53 AM
Got a call from a place I applied to.
"I'm sorry, but it seems that some of these numbers don't work. Do you know of how we can get hold of the Comic Shop in Iowa?"
"It just shut down this year, actually. That number was the cell phone for the owner. That was the only way I could get in touch with him. If that's not working, I don't know how to get in touch."
"Hm. Well, do you know how we can reach the Domino's in Ottumwa?"
"Heh, well, that shut down a few months after I left. The only employee I still keep in contact with was fired before I moved away."
"Oh. That's no good. What about Clockwork Pizzeria?"
"That closed down in March."
"And lemme guess, Da Franco's Italian? They closed too?"
"And are currently in Italy, from what I was told, yes."
"..."
"Hello?"
"Thank you for your time, Mr. Albright."



 :;_;:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on August 09, 2011, 01:47:30 PM
In their defense, you appear to be the plague.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on August 09, 2011, 05:37:15 PM
Well, I mean c'mon, he's a mummy with two snakes. A plague is par for the course. Or at least, cursed snakebites.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on August 09, 2011, 05:43:11 PM
The BEST part is I am moving in January. So whatever job I get will only last until then.
I can't even help it.


The REAL Curse of the Mummy is not having a job for more than 6 months at a time.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on August 09, 2011, 05:55:04 PM
Maybe the REAL Curse of the Mummy here

is man
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on August 09, 2011, 06:59:55 PM
I think we can all agree that Rygaron is the one suffering the most from the Curse of The Mummy.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on August 09, 2011, 10:39:17 PM
I want to give you a karma, but as someone who's got an unusually bad case of kin at the moment, I'm going to say, "too soon" and give a disapproving...

...
Whatever it is apparently I do too much now.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 10, 2011, 06:05:27 AM
So I keep getting recruiter calls out of the blue from established, reputable, major recruiting firms. That's good!  :8D:

Only they keep offering me jobs that are worse and also pay less. That's bad!  ::(:

And they basically confirm what I'd already guessed, which is the fact that I have already plateaued in terms of what kind of income I can get based on my experience and education. That's real bad!  :painful:

Note that my current level of income still does not actually provide enough money to even pay my bills each month, so instead of being able to save income to pay for the badly needed education to escape this situation, I just hang on until I get a three-paycheque month or a tax return, which resets my clock to zero. Roughly. And that a week or two ago, it was made clear that the likelihood of my getting any sort of annual raise at the current job is not what you might call good.

Same old, same old.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on August 12, 2011, 03:53:50 PM
Oh, and I might be making Sergeant soon, assuming my packet didn't fall through the cracks; I'll know more about that later this week.

So yeah, I didn't make it! Turns out, they raised the requirements for promotion by quite a bit, and I didn't quite make the cut. Near as I can figure, it's part of the Army's grand plan to downsize as passive-aggressively as possible, by causing people to get so fed up with the difficulty of advancing your career past a certain point that they just do their time and get out. But hey, it's cool; it's not like the Army NEEDS skilled, experienced leadership or anything.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on August 12, 2011, 04:37:18 PM
fffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on August 12, 2011, 04:38:34 PM
What're you going to do?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on August 12, 2011, 04:42:37 PM
Eh, I'll just keep trying, until I either get promoted, or become one of those bitter old guys who just count the days until they're out.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 12, 2011, 08:58:18 PM
:(

Sorry Ted.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on August 13, 2011, 03:59:27 AM
Apparently I've forgotten how to do anything but work and sleep since getting my job. I'll get home even on days where I get off early and start doing stuff, then somehow end up in bed until the next shift.

My life right now is seriously 8-10 hours of work 12 hours of sleep and 2-4 hours of eating / showering / telling my cat to stop meowing in my ear.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on August 15, 2011, 09:49:52 PM
Day One: This is simultaneously the least difficult and best-paying job I have ever had.

My ideal job is probably moderately more challenging and much higher-paying, but it's hard to complain.

Today consisted mostly of imaging and encrypting laptops.  Which in practice means a few minutes of work followed by several hours of occasionally glancing up from A Feast for Crows to make sure the computers were still imaging and encrypting.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Bongo Bill on August 16, 2011, 03:06:13 PM
It may not be healthy, but in my quest to seek employment in my field, I have begun to think of hiring managers as The Enemy. I need only defeat them and claim their treasure, namely, a job, and peace and prosperity will cover the land.

So I have devised a stratagem.

I shall dig a trench outside of the office. When the hiring manager comes out of its lair, I will be lying in wait with my father's sword Gram, ready to strike from below and disembowel the ancient serpent. The trench will not only conceal me from sight, but also cause its blood to flow away rather than drown me.

Then I shall infiltrate the building. According to legend, being covered in hiring manager blood will render me invincible to all weapons of man and beast, so I should have little difficulty dispatching the security guards that guard the human resources department deep within the bowels of the office. There, I shall inscribe my name in the Ledgers of Employment, and claim the boon I have long sought.

This is an excellent plan that cannot possibly fail.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on August 16, 2011, 03:27:39 PM
Got paid today to go to a competitor's theater and see a movie. Good times.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on August 16, 2011, 08:50:12 PM
dude if you're going to kill the hiring manager just take their magic ring, you don't need a job after that
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 16, 2011, 09:50:55 PM
It may not be healthy, but in my quest to seek employment in my field, I have begun to think of hiring managers as The Enemy.

I'm going to assume at least this part of the post was in earnest and offer some advice.  Remember when I said interviewing is just like dating?  Same thing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on August 17, 2011, 05:30:46 AM
So... girls are The Enemy?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 17, 2011, 07:54:49 AM
Spram should be trying to get a job at McDonald's?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Bongo Bill on August 17, 2011, 11:35:08 AM
Interviews aren't the problem. In person I am charismatic, personable, perceptive, collected, quick-thinking, and, like, super humble. The problem is getting a human to acknowledge that I have responded to their call for applicants. My qualified resume and hand-crafted cover letters seem to tumble into the void.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 17, 2011, 01:43:56 PM
I don't watch that much TV and most people around here know about the System Verification Utility, so I only today realized how weird it sounds when I tell people from outside the department that I'm working on the SVU.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on August 17, 2011, 03:11:09 PM
... You're not going to stop, are you?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 17, 2011, 04:23:39 PM
That's what she said.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on August 19, 2011, 11:46:39 PM
First week down; little has changed.  Blowing through everything they give me and having hours of downtime left over.  Coworkers seem impressed that I'm so far ahead of schedule, but I'd rather have a bit more work.  Some happy medium between "nothing to do" and "stressed the fuck out".

Slowly getting more perms in the system; maybe that'll let them shoot more stuff my way.  Or maybe it just means now I can look up all the user assignments on Sharepoint.

This has been pretty consistent in my work this year (the shitty phone support job notwithstanding).  Imaging laptops is, by nature, a task that involves a lot more sitting around waiting than doin' stuff.

The job I worked from '08-'10 had plenty of shit for me to do in-between imaging, though: shipping packages, receiving packages, tagging equipment, entering it into inventory, unloading trucks in a warehouse on 110-degree days, inhaling fungus, developing asthma...

...truth be told I like this better.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on August 21, 2011, 06:44:40 AM
Oh boy, another markdown story.

Last night, one old lady (who does this regularly) kept coming up to me as I was doing my closing and hassling me about when I was going to be marking stuff down. Around 7:15 I estimated maybe an hour.

8:00 rolls around and she comes back and asks me why I'm not marking stuff down. Turns out she'd gone to Tim Hortons and set her alarm on her cell phone to time me. She argued that I said I'd be marking stuff down (I was currently finishing up slicing the bread).

I told her that wasn't definite and that I mark stuff down when I'm done packing the bread and buns. She brought over a thing of chelsea buns and asked me to mark it down. I told her no, because I wasn't currently marking stuff down. I told her that it's our policy not to mark stuff down on request because then everyone would come up to us and ask for stuff marked down. This went on for a few minutes until (I guess) she went to complain up at the front.

I went on with my work, but then she came back and asked me to mark it down again. At this point I was sick of seeing her so I said "Okay. But this is the only time I can do this. I can't make this a regular thing."

She says "well, I don't have to shop here anymore, you know."

The head cashier told me she complained that she didn't like the way I was treating her and that nobody would buy chelsea buns at the regular price and that she thought I had some sort of grudge against her for being so difficult. She didn't blame me for it though. Enough people are trying to get stuff marked down on request that they're considering getting rid of markdowns altogether.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on August 21, 2011, 06:59:45 AM
Wait, am I reading that wrong? Was it the old lady, or the head cashier who didn't blame you for the perceived grudge-holding? I mean, I know the stereotype is that Canadians are super-polite, but if the cranky old lady complaining about you is understanding about it...
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on August 21, 2011, 07:00:37 AM
Wait, am I reading that wrong? Was it the old lady, or the head cashier who didn't blame you for the perceived grudge-holding? I mean, I know the stereotype is that Canadians are super-polite, but if the cranky old lady complaining about you is understanding about it...
The head cashier. Some Canadians aren't THAT polite, especially not the ones that demand you mark stuff down.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on August 21, 2011, 07:10:17 AM
Ah, I see!

In MY JOB news, today marks the first day that I'll be able to work without a dopey trainee following me around everywhere. Maybe I'll actually make some apprehensions today!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on August 21, 2011, 07:22:49 AM
They did a study and it turns out that bitter, old women customers are objectively the most annoying person possible, ranking in just above 16 year old girls, 13 year old boys, and 1st year psyche majors of any age or gender (which are all tied for 2nd)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on August 21, 2011, 07:26:43 AM
But seriously, I have, say, fifty or so "annoying customer" stories from my years as a waitress, and like fucking thirty of them are old ladies who have nothing better to do than make your life as fucking miserable as possible.

I'd hate them a lot more if I didn't know how unhappy they were.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on August 21, 2011, 07:38:25 AM
Also: a few days ago, we caught a lady who claimed the only reason she was shoplifting was because she couldn't find a job, because she was, in her words, "computer illegitimate".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on August 21, 2011, 07:55:52 AM
Yesssssssssssssss
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 21, 2011, 09:07:03 AM
Did she also pronounce it "AH HAINT GAWT NO JAWB!"?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 21, 2011, 11:18:12 AM
DERK A DURR
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on August 23, 2011, 10:30:22 AM
I learned that my boss is apparently unhappy with my performance.

No, she didn't say anything directly to me. She told my one friend who used to work there and is applying for a position.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on August 23, 2011, 10:37:46 AM
Store leader has left or been fired under mysterious circumstances (nobody who I have talked to knows what's up) a week ago or so, and now my direct manager has accepted a position elsewhere.  Everyone who can track my meteoric rise from total novice to total competence is leaving!  :(
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 25, 2011, 02:49:07 PM
New favorite error message: "expected integer, got A DURR DURR DURR DURR DURR DURR DURR DURR."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on August 25, 2011, 03:08:24 PM
........
....
..
.
Wh-what's its superclass!?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 25, 2011, 03:47:11 PM
Note seen on an account today: "Female put me on power  hold"

No other words, no context, just that. That double-space was somehow very conspicuous.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on August 25, 2011, 10:54:52 PM
On my final check of the booth on my way out of the theatre today I noticed that one of the motors on one of our table racks had gone tits up at some point. I hadn't used that table when I projected today because the movie we're opening tomorrow was on it the whole day, as my boss had done build up this morning before I got there. Well I looked at the table motor for a few minutes and was like, "I can fix this." Went to my car, got my tools, came back inside and made that table motor my absolute bitch. Man, being handy makes you feel like an absolute super hero when you can do something nice with it! :D

Long story short, I made my bosses job a hell of a lot easier tomorrow morning. Maybe now William will stop making fun of me for carrying a full ratchet and wrench set in my car at all times.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 26, 2011, 03:12:51 AM
Man, I dunno how handy I can really call myself, but having ready tools is sweet.

Shiiiiiiiiit son, no joke, I carry a full ratchet and wrench set on my motorbike*.  :perfect:


*Plus a set of Allan keys, multihead screwdrivers, oil wrench, WD40, assorted other tools I can't remember, and the original stock special tool kit that came with the bike
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 26, 2011, 03:18:56 AM
Oh what the hell, I'll just post it.

Ethel Waters My Handy Man (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QCY50FKFyiQ#)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on August 26, 2011, 05:53:30 AM
Long story short, I made my bosses job a hell of a lot easier tomorrow morning. Maybe now William will stop making fun of me for carrying a full ratchet and wrench set in my car at all times.

If he's making fun of you for that, it's he who is the tool, not the ratchet and wrench set!

Seriously, cars should just come with a toolset in the back as a standard feature, with a spot dug out in the trunk by the manufacturer.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 26, 2011, 07:12:21 AM
Hell, I'm not even remotely handy and I keep one multitool in my bag and another in my car.

Also holy balls you guys I'm still in training. They didn't just show me my workstation and tell me to get to work. I will know what my job is and how to do it before I start!

Seriously that like never happens.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on August 26, 2011, 09:03:11 AM
Hell, I'm not even remotely handy and I keep one multitool in my bag and another in my car.

Also holy balls you guys I'm still in training. They didn't just show me my workstation and tell me to get to work. I will know what my job is and how to do it before I start!

Seriously that like never happens.

:perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on August 26, 2011, 10:06:56 AM
Who's got two thumbs and just got stone cold laid off alongside half the company?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on August 26, 2011, 10:07:14 AM
This guyyyyyyyyyyyy~
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on August 26, 2011, 01:05:19 PM
you're not wario
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on August 26, 2011, 01:05:33 PM
wait i mean that fucking sucks
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on August 26, 2011, 05:44:59 PM
What? Kabbage not being Wario?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 26, 2011, 08:24:34 PM
Fuck what hell? 

Where were you working again Kabbage?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 26, 2011, 08:26:20 PM
Long story short, I made my bosses job a hell of a lot easier tomorrow morning. Maybe now William will stop making fun of me for carrying a full ratchet and wrench set in my car at all times.

If he's making fun of you for that, it's he who is the tool, not the ratchet and wrench set!

Seriously, cars should just come with a toolset in the back as a standard feature, with a spot dug out in the trunk by the manufacturer.

You know what's really sad? Many major car manufacturers are actually looking to stop including spare tires in cars - not just cutting the tire, but even removing the space for it and saving the space/weight.

Apparently they did a study which showed that only something like 40% of people change their own flats now, which actually boggles my mind.

I don't know if they'll really go through with it. I hope not anyway.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on August 26, 2011, 08:32:40 PM
What does

Where does Wario even factor into the equation here
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on August 26, 2011, 08:37:05 PM
(http://img854.imageshack.us/img854/6977/warioh.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on August 26, 2011, 09:01:19 PM
Long story short, I made my bosses job a hell of a lot easier tomorrow morning. Maybe now William will stop making fun of me for carrying a full ratchet and wrench set in my car at all times.

If he's making fun of you for that, it's he who is the tool, not the ratchet and wrench set!

Seriously, cars should just come with a toolset in the back as a standard feature, with a spot dug out in the trunk by the manufacturer.

You know what's really sad? Many major car manufacturers are actually looking to stop including spare tires in cars - not just cutting the tire, but even removing the space for it and saving the space/weight.

Apparently they did a study which showed that only something like 40% of people change their own flats now, which actually boggles my mind.

I don't know if they'll really go through with it. I hope not anyway.

I feel the same way about people that don't know how to change their own oil.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on August 26, 2011, 09:52:39 PM
What does

Where does Wario even factor into the equation here




 :perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on August 26, 2011, 09:57:42 PM
I've changed flats, but I wouldn't know how to dispose of the refuse after a proper oil change. You can't just put that out on the curb for the city to take, can you?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on August 26, 2011, 10:31:55 PM
Most cities have collection sites.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 27, 2011, 05:53:01 AM
Yep. Also, some big box places with garages will accept oil (Canadian Tire used to, and still does at some locations... I think some WalMarts do, etc.)

Long story short, I made my bosses job a hell of a lot easier tomorrow morning. Maybe now William will stop making fun of me for carrying a full ratchet and wrench set in my car at all times.

If he's making fun of you for that, it's he who is the tool, not the ratchet and wrench set!

Seriously, cars should just come with a toolset in the back as a standard feature, with a spot dug out in the trunk by the manufacturer.

You know what's really sad? Many major car manufacturers are actually looking to stop including spare tires in cars - not just cutting the tire, but even removing the space for it and saving the space/weight.

Apparently they did a study which showed that only something like 40% of people change their own flats now, which actually boggles my mind.

I don't know if they'll really go through with it. I hope not anyway.

I feel the same way about people that don't know how to change their own oil.

I don't blame people AS MUCH for this, since there are one or two important things to know mechanically before doing an oil change. But yeah, it's still very basic maintenance. I wouldn't own a vehicle I couldn't do at least the basic work on.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on August 28, 2011, 04:06:18 PM
Hrm, anyone here gone on unemployment before? Anything I should know before I just go on down to the office and apply?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on August 28, 2011, 04:22:51 PM
Unrelated to Kabbage's query:

5.5 hours of overtime yesterday!  Woo!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 28, 2011, 04:36:24 PM
Hrm, anyone here gone on unemployment before? Anything I should know before I just go on down to the office and apply?

I dunno how it works in the US, but up here you need your record of employment (issued by the employer) before applying. There's also a waiting period of at least two weeks before benefits start. You may want to check the requirements on MA's .gov website.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on August 28, 2011, 07:00:39 PM
is this what it feels like to be a poor personnnn
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on August 28, 2011, 07:47:20 PM
In Arizona the whole thing is surprisingly painless; there's a website where you fill out what your last day of work was (they won't let you do it until you've actually worked your last day), where it was, why you were let go, what you were making, etc.  A few days later, they E-Mail you an approval; after that, every Sunday you log in, fill out a form saying that yes you're still looking for work, no you haven't refused any offers, and let them know if you've made any money, and then you get your pay.  By default they give you a Bank One debit card, though you can arrange for direct deposit into an existing account.

You don't get paid your first week, and if you miss reporting for a week you have to reapply.  (As such I'm still reporting every week just in case I suddenly lose my job again.  I'm not lying or scamming; I tell them how much I've made each week, and it's enough that they don't pay me anything, they just keep me on the rolls in case I have another situation like I did in June.  Strictly speaking I DON'T have full-time employment; I'm still a temp.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 28, 2011, 07:51:06 PM
Remember that government work is geared to the absolute lowest common denominator. Head down to your local Department of Labor and they'll make it excruciatingly clear what you have to do.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on August 29, 2011, 09:46:38 AM
god having no job sucks a stone cold d straight up the hell do I even do with all this frigging time for fucks sdfsdaf aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on August 29, 2011, 09:56:42 AM
look for work
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on August 29, 2011, 09:58:02 AM
Employment is a chump's game!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on August 29, 2011, 10:00:30 AM
YOU'RE a chump's game.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on August 29, 2011, 11:23:49 AM
Make a dinosaurs theme porno
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on August 29, 2011, 03:00:34 PM
Work on making a video game!
THEN you're making a game and you don't have to tell people you're unemployed. You'd be self-employed.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 29, 2011, 05:52:01 PM
Get up at six. Work by eight. Work until four-thirty. Go directly to class. Work until 8:30. Come home, wash/dry/iron my one work uniform. Tomorrow, do it all AGAIN BUT HARDER.

Also when I got home my mother was watching Hell's Kitchen or whatever it is because what I really need right now is to hear a stressed-out chef yelling at people.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 01, 2011, 04:03:01 PM
So first I was like
Rainbow Dash - gonna be awesome (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l8JCX9E0bEI#ws)

And then I was like
Fluttershy - you're going to love me! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rwp60eYuie0#ws)

And then they were like
Applejack - hmmmm, nah (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ClXAaGoT5eE#ws)

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on September 01, 2011, 04:06:53 PM
PLEASE tell me that does not mean what I think it means.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on September 01, 2011, 04:10:34 PM
That R^2 is a major brony?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 01, 2011, 04:56:17 PM
More like a poorny!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on September 01, 2011, 05:17:48 PM
I meant more "Please tell me he is still employed"
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 01, 2011, 05:44:24 PM
That R^2 is a major brony?

Actually no!

I meant more "Please tell me he is still employed"

Actually yes!

But I got demoted. I'm slumming in a dishpit. Again.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on September 07, 2011, 12:14:21 PM
Yay, I finally got a key to the room I work in!

Now I don't have to prop the door and let all the riffraff in!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Silversong on September 07, 2011, 03:53:04 PM
I started my new job. It's going pretty well, except I'm not sure if they like the ochaken plushies I put on my desk and I can't ever listen to music.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 07, 2011, 06:58:04 PM
I got a call this morning at 7:20, from work, to talk about "my schedule". Only I wasn't home to take the call because my schedule is that I go in at 8:00 every day.

Nobody mentioned anything about it to me at work, but maybe it was "Hey we hired a new guy will you be able to show him around" since they hired a new guy and I had to show him around.

Still... weird.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 07, 2011, 07:03:39 PM
Given your history, I am pretty sure that every single person in this board is envisioning similarly awful scenarios.

:/
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on September 07, 2011, 08:13:20 PM
Tonight at work, we caught a cop stealing. A Mexican cop, whose American boyfriend is also a cop.

Also, we had a guy escape from us(although we weren't really pursuing him, we just wanted to see where he was going) by diving into the retaining pond that holds all the runoff rainwater. If it works for Solid Snake...
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on September 08, 2011, 05:56:16 AM
GUYS

CANADIANS ARE COMING TO VISIT MY WORK TODAY

WHAT DO I DOOOOOO
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on September 08, 2011, 06:48:24 AM
Easy, just be polite, don't mention Stephen Harper, and you should be fine. If things look bad, start distributing donuts and mention how great their beer is.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on September 08, 2011, 09:52:40 AM
street hockey in the parking lot
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on September 08, 2011, 10:08:42 AM
Cover every surface with a fine layer of maple syrup, so they feel at home.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on September 08, 2011, 10:24:06 AM
parking lot street hockey
parking hockey

pocky
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 08, 2011, 03:00:38 PM
Easy, just be polite, don't mention Stephen Harper, and you should be fine. If things look bad, start distributing donuts and mention how great their beer is.

I dunno, if these are Canadians who work for WalMart at a management level, they're probably one promotion away from joining a Conservative riding association.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 08, 2011, 06:08:34 PM
Given your history, I am pretty sure that every single person in this board is envisioning similarly awful scenarios.

The store opens next week and the manager is trying to get everyone's schedules posted for when that happens. He was just double-checking to make absolutely sure that as of next Friday I have no obligations on my time, which is indeed the case. No worries on that front.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on September 08, 2011, 08:00:20 PM
The Canadians were really nice, actually!

Fortunately, we had a small carving of one of their Canadian folk heroes on our desk:

(http://i385.photobucket.com/albums/oo297/BBLegs/320609_10150318093727649_752442648_7763782_1422529622_n.jpg)

They seemed pleased by this.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 14, 2011, 06:18:30 AM
All the practice I put in trying to get up to snuff at work aced my last knifecuts practical exam in culinary school.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on September 14, 2011, 07:41:04 AM
knifecuts practical exam

(http://www.willcwhite.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/rebelscreen.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 15, 2011, 01:19:31 AM
Sort of like that, but two dozen people at once.

I passed. You can imagine the penalty for failure. 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 17, 2011, 08:57:59 PM
I am a rockstar and everyone knows it.  :perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on September 17, 2011, 09:00:20 PM
For a split second, I read that Wario icon as saying "Fellatio".

... I should probably go lie down.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 18, 2011, 06:12:20 AM
I'm not THAT much of a rockstar.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on September 25, 2011, 01:12:57 PM
After months of looking, I've got a job offer. Pay is good and it's working for my old boss from Clockwork, if the money is similar then I'll make $150+ in tips alone a night .

Job is in North Carolina. But! I've got a place to stay and the job is always open as long as he owns a restaurant.

It's actually very tempting.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on September 25, 2011, 01:14:57 PM
Do it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ocksi on September 25, 2011, 01:56:41 PM
Where in NC?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on September 25, 2011, 02:28:57 PM
...Nashville? I think.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 25, 2011, 06:01:31 PM
Huh, there actually is a Nashville, NC. I figured you meant Asheville until I looked.

I warn you, though. I live in Tennessee and it's excruciating, but it's goddamn cosmopolitan compared to North Carolina. 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 25, 2011, 10:16:49 PM
Could be worse. Could be South Carolina! That town looks REALLY SMALL though. If the job ever goes south, your alternate prospects may be non-existent.

I actually have a friend in Asheville (which is sadly pretty far from Nashville NC)... it's a pretty progressive hippie university town. It is however not representative of the state. And it IS still in North Carolina.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ocksi on September 26, 2011, 01:46:57 AM
You clearly don't know much about NC.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on September 26, 2011, 05:38:01 AM
It's higher than South Carolina, right?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 26, 2011, 06:50:16 PM
You clearly don't know much about NC.

Why, you are correct! 

I do think that town Lottel's talking about moving to looks really fucking small on the map.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on October 20, 2011, 01:36:45 PM
Six training sessions scheduled throughout the week.  Just finished my third and I feel like I've gone three rounds with Tyson.  I could never be any kind of instructor full-time and have nothing but respect for people who can.

(Though most people aren't naturally social-avoidant, I guess.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on October 20, 2011, 02:36:49 PM
I did a good amount of this when they were having us train up our replacements, and it is... I'm really not used to being the sole center of attention and sole point of interest for eight straight hours, five times a week. The amount of time you need to fill, talking you need to do, and review over old material necessary to get these people to where they can again rely on common sense is something else.

It is kind of fun coming up with metaphors to explain abstract technology to old people, though. This one lady I was training had no idea what the internet was. Imagine trying to explain what the internet is exactly, in useful terms, to someone who barely knows how to use her computer. They look at you like you're making this up as you go.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on October 20, 2011, 03:50:42 PM
In fairness, if you're using metaphors, you are.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on October 20, 2011, 03:55:44 PM
Six training sessions scheduled throughout the week.  Just finished my third and I feel like I've gone three rounds with Tyson.

Punch-Out Tyson or I Wanna Be The Guy Tyson?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on October 20, 2011, 08:37:16 PM
Real has-a-history-of-unregulated-violence Tyson?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on October 28, 2011, 04:55:25 PM
Tonight at work, I overheard a kid at the fish with his mom tell her, "I'm looking for a dead one!"

Serial killers are so cute when they're little.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on October 31, 2011, 03:07:26 PM
God damn it, I'm a de facto middle manager again.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on October 31, 2011, 03:15:21 PM
Do you regard Scott Adams with more or less disdain than you did previously?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on October 31, 2011, 03:27:08 PM
More, but I'm pretty sure that says more about Adams than anything.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on October 31, 2011, 03:29:59 PM
A job which I thought was going to be temporary has become full employment. I had signed on originally to help them for a few months ago while someone on maternity leave. It was a job I had done previously, and It was good timing, because I had just quit my job at phone support/sales at a call center. (If you want to know why, re-read the previous sentence.) The person who was on maternity leave came back, but the company has enough that needs to be done that I have been hired on as a full time employee... again.

Again, you ask? Well, funny you should wonder that. It's a job I walked out of the office and quit on the spot about a year ago because of my loathing I have for other employees, processes, and general feeling they have here.

Nothing has been fixed. Some things have become worse, in fact.

Yet in this economy/situation I really can't turn this down. I considered all the options and possible outcomes of each and realized if I didn't take this job, the odds of me working in the next year or so would be absolutely null.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on October 31, 2011, 03:32:16 PM
Er, yeah, what he said.

Also that strip IS pretty spot-on about how development works in a large corporation but it never really addresses the root causes of the typical dysfunction or even the fact that there are any.  Without looking at his biography I'm going to guess that Adams has never really had a position that involved directs.

EDIT: Pre-strip, obviously.  Once he started hiring people is when you suddenly see the strip shift its tone from The Office to Seinfeld.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on October 31, 2011, 07:53:31 PM
See, I read it quite a lot in the 1990's and read it as starting out with a lot of wacky settings, stories, and situations and then turning into generic workplace comedy.  Like most other strips (Peanuts, Garfield, ...) it started out weird and interesting and then found its rut and kept digging.

Adams himself is a petulant, socially-maladjusted, misogynistic nerd all grown up.  The read I get from him is a guy who never got over being picked on in junior high -- ESPECIALLY by the girls.  He's gone from bragging about his IQ through sock-puppet comments on articles that criticize him to openly mocking women who want equal pay as petulant children.

I'm not sure if he makes other grownup nerds look bad by association or good by comparison, but one way or another he embodies pretty much every negative stereotype about us.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on November 03, 2011, 03:19:38 PM
So today the restaurant ran out of eggs. So I had to go across the street to a store to buy some. Two dozen, as a matter of fact.

It turned out to be cheaper to buy one package of eighteen and a package of six than it was to buy two packages of twelve. So that's what I did.

Some people I work with were seriously baffled that I reached 24 via 18+6 rather than 12+12.

Personally I think they were

/me avatar

Ova-reacting.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on November 03, 2011, 03:50:02 PM
"Hey do you remember that job you did when you were here the first time/the one you quit over? Can you do that job again? Thanks."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 05, 2011, 03:55:43 PM
I won't go into exactly why, but today at work I had the opportunity to loudly sing the following lines:

When I was a lad I ate four dozen eggs
Ev'ry morning to help me get large
And now that I'm grown I eat five dozen eggs
So I'm roughly the size of a barge!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 06, 2011, 11:10:08 AM
Okay...

The weekend Supervisior (Sea Bass, as described previously) was joking he was going to give us all alternate names.

He said - and I swear I am not making this up - my altenate name would be Gaston.

I asked him flat out "Is this because of the disney song I was singing yesterday?" "You were singing yesterday? Who's Gaston? I just figured that would be a good name for you."

:scanners:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on November 06, 2011, 11:16:52 AM
(http://i107.photobucket.com/albums/m285/fofonda/hairygaston02.gif)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on November 07, 2011, 01:26:26 PM
"Weird Happenings".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 07, 2011, 02:53:53 PM
Today we had a three-hour meeting. The opening ramble was actually the CFO as guest speaker.

It is... extremely unsettling to watch the CFO of a 30,000-employee corporation have a minor meltdown in front of an entire division.

High Lowlights included:

"But... uhhhhh... that's not my job. That'syourjob!" *extremely nervous laughter.

Several variations on "But I don't really know anything about that."

"So... how do you guys think we're doing on a scale of one to ten?" Deafening silence. "So uh, never mind 1-10, let's just say, um, 5-8, yeah... yeah. And uh, just pick the one or the other, 5 or 8."

"We're ah... we're doing quite... well, not badly, but uhhhh certainly not as good as we were. And ah, I guess we don't quite know what to do."

Many variations on "I guess we don't really have anything that we're better at than the competition anymore. It's uhhh, it's gotten tougher."

It was quite possibly the least inspiring corporate speech I've heard in a long time, if ever. The company's in decent shape, it's just been a bit learderless since the ole' iron-fisted founder died. But if you listened to this guy, you'd think we were going to be bankrupt tomorrow.

There's nothing wrong with being honest about reduced prospects, but this guy's delivery was TERRIBLE. He avoided involvement (your problem, not mine) had no plan, was nervous, and just generally sounded hopeless and clueless.

It was just incredibly awkward.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on November 07, 2011, 03:18:22 PM
(http://assets.diylol.com/hfs/573/469/7c5/icon/TVW9h.jpg)

Can't think of what to do here, but you can fill in the blanks I'm sure.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 09, 2011, 11:00:08 AM
It's just occurred to me that I have never had to train/lead someone whose first language was English.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on November 09, 2011, 01:30:00 PM
I am really dreading my shift tonight. Now that the pre-Christmas season is here, the store has started piping in nonstop covers of holiday b-sides like "Last Christmas" and "Do They Know it's Christmas" and "Baby It's Cold Outside" even though I'm pretty sure that has nothing to do with Christmas.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on November 09, 2011, 03:13:27 PM
Christmas rape is a tradition!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on November 10, 2011, 02:04:44 PM
Turns out the company where I work doesn't take Veterans' Day off.  But the temp agency that signs my checks considers it a holiday.

So on the minus side, I don't get tomorrow off, but on the plus side, I get double time.

Guess I should ask about Black Friday, since this is technically the retail industry I guess, even though I'm as far removed from that business as possible.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Malikial on November 18, 2011, 03:00:31 AM
Work a late show. (http://youtu.be/NisCkxU544c)
Get cussed out. (http://youtu.be/NisCkxU544c)
Try to solve a problem. (http://youtu.be/NisCkxU544c)
Get cussed out. (http://youtu.be/NisCkxU544c)
Remain polite. (http://youtu.be/NisCkxU544c)
Get cussed out (http://youtu.be/NisCkxU544c)
Tell a bitch to leave. (http://youtu.be/NisCkxU544c)
Get cussed out. (http://youtu.be/NisCkxU544c)
Don't give a bitch a refund. (http://youtu.be/NisCkxU544c)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Smiler on November 18, 2011, 06:47:23 AM
The best part is that since they are there to see Twillight no one cares if you throw them out.  :8D:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lady Duke on November 21, 2011, 10:01:00 AM
One of the least fun things I have to do at work is eBay, mostly because of all the shitty fucking whiners that buy on there.  Example:  We charge what items actually cost for us to ship, which causes people to complain that they have to pay a whole 3 dollars for their precious coin to be shipped in a mailer. 

So today, this woman who bought 2 coins actually had the gall to say we have extremely high shipping charges.  3 dollars is a lot you know.  So I wrote her back that next time, I'll send her her coins in an unpadded business envelope if she wants (I didn't write it rudely though because negative feedback will make my dad cry).  Seriously though, that is fucking bullshit that she thinks that it's expensive, because it's actually less than it costs us to ship--my dad pays me a fucking salary to deal with eBay, so there's handling, a mailer costs 50 cents or more, delivery confirmation costs 70 cents, and I know from tons of experience that the regular shipping for a first class mailer is 2.55 unless its heavy.  So that comes out over 4 dollars.  And to top off that line of thinking, we got an email from eBay last week about ways to improve our sales--they called and told my dad we should offer free shipping.  That is their solution.  They said he'd be a top rated seller if he'd just take a huge loss on all the shipping for everything.  He basically told them that made no sense in our business model, whereupon the person on the phone got quite rude and then hung up on him.  Just to show how fucked up eBay really is, we got 12 ratings out 1000 that our shipping charges were less than 5 stars, so we can't be a top rated seller.  QQQQQ lol no.

And that ends my rant about how much I want to punch eBay straight in the face.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on November 21, 2011, 10:03:41 AM
Boss: "Hey remember that project you worked on a few months ago, but we had you drop because the deadline was so far away and we had more pressing issues?"
Z:"You mean the one where it was extensive documentation and following up and pestering people that had no intention of getting me what I needed, ever?"
Boss: "Yes, that one. The deadline is in three weeks and you need to finish what you were doing and add everything that's happened in the last few months so it's current. Which means look it over, determine what's missing, make a list out of it, and gather what's missing."

:fuckyou:

Fun fact: Even if I were to work every waking hour in the next three weeks. I would not have enough hours to complete this project. This is true insanity.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on November 21, 2011, 03:04:11 PM
Boss: "Hey remember that project you worked on a few months ago, but we had you drop because the deadline was so far away and we had more pressing issues?"
Z:"You mean the one where it was extensive documentation and following up and pestering people that had no intention of getting me what I needed, ever?"
Boss: "Yes, that one. The deadline is in three weeks and you need to finish what you were doing and add everything that's happened in the last few months so it's current. Which means look it over, determine what's missing, make a list out of it, and gather what's missing."

:fuckyou:

Fun fact: Even if I were to work every waking hour in the next three weeks. I would not have enough hours to complete this project. This is true insanity.

:derp:: "Okay, so I know you've already made incredible progress and wasted basically a whole day, but.. Nevermind, go back to what you were doing before we gave you this project."
:humpf:: ...
:derp:: "Not that this situation is at all solved, and we'll have to rush to get it done in the remaining couple weeks, but don't worry, we'll stress you out then. Not now."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Norondor on November 21, 2011, 03:27:13 PM
see the reason we should have businesses control everything is because they're a lot more efficient and clever than governments
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on November 22, 2011, 08:40:21 AM
I'm not going to argue that businesses should control everything but compared to my experience with government work as of late, yeah. With Ziiro's post in mind, they still are.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 27, 2011, 09:32:21 PM
A tale of work featuring my oppressive racial profiling in service of petty authority and The Man.

Had some magnificently hilarious fraud today.

This fellow, has a middle eastern name and has purchased Al Jazeera as one of his cable channels. Okay sure, but so does Cat Stevens (probably). No big deal so far.

The account was flagged due to the email address being used in previous fraud (pay attention kids, I'ma teach you how to defraud yer telecom company!), so I run the address. Of course the dumbass is using his real email address and has a public facebook profile (herpaderp!).

The face book profile is draped with religious islamic messages (not crazy or anything, just... hey this guy's devout), has a long friends list with many veiled ladies and (most importantly) has a totally different name, but one which is still middle eastern. The facebook page also clearly lists the fact that the guy was born in Cairo.

The funny part comes in when Mr. Fake tries to explain his shitty fake ID to the dealer. You see, the only ID the guy provided (and the only ID the guy claimed to have) was [spoiler]a Native Status card[/spoiler].

:glee:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 05, 2011, 05:02:41 PM
Today I learned something interesting.

The cable TV part of our business is run through a graphical interface overlaid over an old AS400 system. That old AS400 system is in turn built over an underlying software system that dates back to the 70's. That underlying system is still in place and still manages accounts to this day.

But the software in the underlying system doesn't actually date back to the 70's. It's actually older. It's the commercial version of a peice of software that was originally designed to manage systems for the Apollo Moon Landing program.

That is simultaneously cool and horrifying.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on December 05, 2011, 08:21:45 PM
That's out of this world, man.
Far out.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on December 06, 2011, 09:58:49 PM
have a weird, truncated schedule tonight that will leave my coworker closing by himself.  I tell him last night that I'll stay until we're done so that he doesn't have to worry about that.

Get there tonight, he says "I'm sick so I'm going home", stays for another two hours appearing completely fine, then leaves me to spend two extra hours closing up by myself, during which I cut my finger open moderately badly while cleaning the knives.

Also when I pointed out some shit that has been seriously wrong lately to him, his response was "I was taught not to throw team members under the bus, so just do what you do and be happy".

maybe this should go in good timeeeees
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on December 06, 2011, 11:06:15 PM
(http://francois.brontoforum.us/miscpic/lamerbus.jpg)

BEEP BEEP
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on December 07, 2011, 11:37:29 PM
Tell him to suck a fuck
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on December 08, 2011, 06:39:40 AM
have a weird, truncated schedule tonight that will leave my coworker closing by himself.  I tell him last night that I'll stay until we're done so that he doesn't have to worry about that.

Get there tonight, he says "I'm sick so I'm going home", stays for another two hours appearing completely fine, then leaves me to spend two extra hours closing up by myself, during which I cut my finger open moderately badly while cleaning the knives.

Also when I pointed out some shit that has been seriously wrong lately to him, his response was "I was taught not to throw team members under the bus, so just do what you do and be happy".

maybe this should go in good timeeeees
(http://francois.brontoforum.us/miscpic/lamerbus.jpg)

BEEP BEEP

Yeah at this point I think you should pull the boss around front, set out the red carpet and guide him gently and lovingly under it. You did something nice for him, and he deliberately fucked you for it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on December 08, 2011, 08:51:44 AM
Also when I pointed out some shit that has been seriously wrong lately to him, his response was "I was taught not to throw team members under the bus, so just do what you do and be happy".

Is it possible he thought you might report him for drug use?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on December 08, 2011, 08:53:17 AM
Nah, this involved underweighing items and sanitation concerns.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on December 08, 2011, 08:59:11 AM
I guess it seemed like he was trying to guilt you into not "tattling"?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on December 08, 2011, 11:27:37 AM
Yeah, dude is scum. He'll try and make you feel like a narc if you rat on him, but if you don't he's just going to try exploiting you more later.  Basically, burn the witch.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on December 08, 2011, 12:18:00 PM
The real problem though is I have basically nobody to narc on because all the problems in our department right now are each person doing their own negligent thing adding up to a shitty whole, including problems caused by management.  A lot of the problems actually aren't caused by him, he's just a lazy sack of shit who doesn't care to do anything about them while causing his own problems (re: sack of lazy shit).  So I'm just poking around other departments trying to see if there's an opening for me to transfer instead.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 08, 2011, 12:22:48 PM
Where are you working again nowadays?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Malikial on December 08, 2011, 12:40:56 PM
I like my job, I do, I actually pretty much love it. But there is one problem that is annoying me slightly this winter. I've been sick off and on, not that bad except a couple of days. But I literally work in such a needed position/catch up position(I basically am employed to make sure other people do their shit right or do what other people don't do right and then report it to management) that I cannot ever take a day off because if I don't come in my place of business is fucked and my general respect for my managers doesn't allow me to fuck them over. It's just slightly annoying to see all the kids we have working for us(Between ages 17-21) taking 1-2 days off a month for stupid shit and then when I am literally so sick I can't talk a full sentence without coughing up something resembling banana pudding I still go in on days like today, important days when I have to be there because if I'm not we literally won't be ready for the busy weekend rush.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on December 08, 2011, 12:55:54 PM
Where are you working again nowadays?

Seafood counter at Whole Foods.  Where sanitation issues are kind of a huge deal.

I like my job, I do, I actually pretty much love it. But there is one problem that is annoying me slightly this winter. I've been sick off and on, not that bad except a couple of days. But I literally work in such a needed position/catch up position(I basically am employed to make sure other people do their shit right or do what other people don't do right and then report it to management) that I cannot ever take a day off because if I don't come in my place of business is fucked and my general respect for my managers doesn't allow me to fuck them over. It's just slightly annoying to see all the kids we have working for us(Between ages 17-21) taking 1-2 days off a month for stupid shit and then when I am literally so sick I can't talk a full sentence without coughing up something resembling banana pudding I still go in on days like today, important days when I have to be there because if I'm not we literally won't be ready for the busy weekend rush.

Also this, at every job I have ever worked.  My baller immune system makes me gradually loathe every person who has a sick day every week or two.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on December 08, 2011, 01:43:58 PM
I found out my work computer can run world of warcraft

this is a great idea
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Nerd on December 16, 2011, 10:08:18 PM
Looks like one of my co-workers got escorted out by police earlier yesterday for stealing company property (drugs, probably).  A co-worker who I had gotten a job for in the first place by referring him.  WOOPS

 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on December 16, 2011, 10:19:49 PM
Wait, you work for a company where you can score drugs?

Can I get a reference?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Nerd on December 16, 2011, 10:23:08 PM
If you don't mind being poor and possibly stoned on painkillers all the time, I don't see why not!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 17, 2011, 05:54:59 AM
As long as he was "just some guy you knew" as opposed to a longtime friend.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on December 21, 2011, 10:54:52 AM
Did The Peter Principle ever cover "Any competent team will be reduced to its least competent elements after promotions are handed out."?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on December 21, 2011, 11:32:35 AM
It's implicit in stating that people are promoted until they reach the point of incompetence.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on December 21, 2011, 11:48:31 AM
Did The Peter Principle ever cover "Any competent team will be reduced to its least competent elements after promotions are handed out."?

So... You're saying you got promoted?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on December 21, 2011, 07:27:16 PM
Took me over two weeks bugging my rep, but I finally found out why I didn't get paid for Thanksgiving.

Turns out you have to work 24 hours in a week to get holiday pay.

I worked 23.5 that week.

Because the place closed early on Wednesday and wouldn't let me stay.

It's not that I desperately need a month-old day's pay, but I am hoping my rep can wrangle something for me because that's kind of a slap in the face.

(Similarly, the reason I didn't get paid for the 4th of July was that I only worked 12 hours the week before the 4th of July.  Because I had just been fired.)

I mean, you know, I'm doing okay.  It could be a lot worse.  But it could be a lot better, too, and I really hate it when I feel like I'm being nickeled and dimed on top of already having a job that's pretty far south of my talents.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 31, 2011, 03:11:23 PM
Overheard at work:

"Sir, what are you doing in Nigeria? Can you verify you're the owner of this phone? We have no history of you travelling to Africa."
"... I'm in Niagara."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 31, 2011, 03:14:45 PM
Also, this is maybe more of a weird happening. A repair guy came up today to fix a vent. While he was here, he suddenly yelled and tossed something out of his ass pocket, then having done so, he shook his burnt hand around to cool it off. The object he'd chucked was a small flashlight, which was now deforming the plastic top on a nearby desk.

Somehow, without warning (and after sitting harmlessly in the dude's pocket for who-knows-how long) the pocket flashlight had gotten so hot that the flashlight's batteries (two AAs) had melted.

Never heard of a short-circuit like that before :wat:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on January 03, 2012, 07:32:03 AM
...came into work to find my account unexpectedly locked out this morning, for a rather nasty sense of deja vu.

Given that it had apparently been set to expire at the end of the year and they didn't lock me out of the admin account that let me into AD to fix it, I am assuming that this time it was an oversight.  But I should probably double-check at some point.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on January 03, 2012, 07:39:43 AM
Around this time last year I got a call from a guy who was locked out of windows. I pulled up his account and while I was opening his AD account, someone in HR was going through off-board procedures. I couldn't figure out why his account looked so weird until about 2 minutes later he started choking up and said "I'm being fired" and hung up.

fuckin' IT, man.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 03, 2012, 09:03:43 AM
Speaking of IT... I was done at 8pm last night, but had to send a case for an application error that was preventing me from cancelling a fraudulent account. Okay, three minutes to type up and submit a ticket... only there's no routing for me to send this to the correct queue? Oh boy, must call IT.

The *best* part about working for even a senior investigative division within the company - or any division that touches customer stuff at all - is that you still get treated like a fucking customer (i.e. every Big Stupid Telecom Company customer service nightmare you can possibly have, rolled into every call), when you call for anything. Clueless responsibility-avoidance is the order of the day.

So an hour later I'm finally told "Oh you can't even submit a ticket for that. Your senior manager has to submit a ticket for an application error on an individual account".

:rage: :MENDOZAAAAA: :fukit: :MENDOZAAAAA: :rage:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on January 03, 2012, 09:15:34 AM
I can speak for everyone at helpdesk, Mongrel, when I say that we think the same exact thing about you guys. =p

I literally just got off the phone with someone who thought that instead of her mandatory training that was sent to her, she'd just call the helpdesk for assistance with a new software program that just came out.  :rage:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 03, 2012, 10:20:22 AM
Man, I don't mind being totally fucking blown off by someone - that's the life in a corporation. Just don't take an hour of my time to do so.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 03, 2012, 10:24:15 AM
It was even sillier. One of the IT guys was like "Just use the ticket grid in the online company encyclopedia". When I told them that there wasn't anything in there, he told me he had to take control of my computer. Okay fine whatever, have a look.

But you know WHY he had to take control? Because I-fucking-T doesn't have access to the company encyclopedia. He needed the access just to read the encyclopedia for himself (lo and behold, I was telling the truth).

It was even funnier when he told me "hold on I have to look at one other thing", because I quickly realized that he was not using my computer to do anything further for my problem, but was instead copying the case pages so he and his friends would actually have the info (I do not blame the guy in the least for doing that).

Like my complaints are not about IT workers, they're about this fucking company and its suicidal silo problem.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on January 03, 2012, 11:23:43 AM
I would view that as taking an hour of my time to help someone else cut through the red tape that's making them completely useless, and in turn helping the next few people who are going to need him to be functional.  You've probably been more useful overall in that hour than in most given hours of attempting to do your own impaired function.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 03, 2012, 11:42:51 AM
Well, his copying of files was only a couple minutes out of the whole. And he was one of three IT guys I wound up talking to.

So the hour was still more or less a waste. But I sure don't blame that guy.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on January 04, 2012, 07:59:25 PM
I have summarized my recent experience spending a year bouncing from job to job in a post titled Tempin' Ain't Easy (http://www.corporate-sellout.com/index.php/2012/01/04/tempin-aint-easy/).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 04, 2012, 08:31:19 PM
Where does the job you use to have as a Systems Guy for that low-rent ISP fit in there?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on January 04, 2012, 08:57:34 PM
Well before the stuff in that timeline.  I worked that one 2006-2007; Job #1 in that timeline was all of 2009 and 2010 and the rest covers 2011.

But I allude to the old one in a couple places, as you probably notice.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on January 05, 2012, 03:32:35 AM
Quote
"Do you know Linux? We're hiring!" said the billboard, with a colorful mascot next to the words. I would see it on the freeway on my way to work. Or maybe it was on my way home from work. Maybe it was both; I think they had more than one billboard.

hahahahahahahhaha
ha
haha
ha

Sorry, I could have saved you some time on that one.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on January 05, 2012, 06:25:05 AM
Quote from: thad's blog
He added that I'd been sacked because they thought I didn't schmooze enough with the end users over the phone — something that nobody had ever actually complained to me about. I wasn't rude, or even brusque; I was just, in my rep's words, "too focused on getting the job done". I'm used to support jobs emphasizing getting the task done quickly, because the user doesn't want to be on the phone and wants to get back to what she was doing. But apparently that's not how it worked at this company; they wanted me to slow down and shoot the breeze — except nobody ever bothered to tell me that. Come on, guys, if you want me to talk about the weather, just say so — I have quite a lot to say about the weather in Phoenix in June, even when half the state isn't on fire.

Anyhow, it's the only job I've ever been fired from. And nobody even bothered to tell me there was a problem, let alone that I'd been fired.


This sounds conspiracy theory ish, but having worked for phone farms on and off pretty much exclusively for the last five years, they probably fired you because if they didn't fire you they'd have to start paying you more pretty soon.

Call centers want middling effort for minimum pay. People who go the extra mile, esp. in places that are contract jobs or don't have much growth outside of 'manager who gets paid less than his employees' tend to get alienated by their peers and quickly shuttled away by managers who are afraid of hurting the bottom line.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on January 05, 2012, 06:59:00 AM
Nah, they were constantly encouraging people to put in all the OT they could.  And I was contracted for 5 more months at the same rate.

And it's not like they're obligated to hire you on or even raise your rate after your initial contract's up.  That gig I had for two years started out as a three-month contract; my pay never did go up (even though, as you might expect, my responsibilities increased quite a bit -- not to "I am running the entire server farm and you are only giving me one extra dollar" levels like my admin job in '07, but still).

Whatever the problem was, it wasn't money.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on January 05, 2012, 12:38:55 PM
Quote
"Do you know Linux? We're hiring!" said the billboard, with a colorful mascot next to the words. I would see it on the freeway on my way to work. Or maybe it was on my way home from work. Maybe it was both; I think they had more than one billboard.

hahahahahahahhaha
ha
haha
ha

Sorry, I could have saved you some time on that one.

Oh right, the Texans probably know which company I'm talking about.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on January 05, 2012, 01:31:16 PM
See somewhere earlier in the thread about the job I could only stand for four days.  Your assessment of it not being too much different from the one you were then-currently at is correct.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on January 06, 2012, 09:28:49 PM
You know, when I mentioned to a friend that I was working on the blog post but not naming any of my employers, he said I really should, so that people would be warned.  Your post tends to corroborate that point -- you really could have saved me some hassle.

Still not much point in naming and shaming the company that fucked me -- it's a company that's already got a pretty terrible reputation.  I felt a sinking feeling as soon as my rep told me what company it was (not least because I knew exactly how far away it was -- because, again, it is across the street from my old apartment) -- but said "okay" anyway because I didn't have any other bites.

Speaking of my rep, I talked to him today.  It turns out the reason I didn't get paid for Thanksgiving is that you have to work a minimum of 24 hours in a week to earn holiday pay, and -- I shit you not -- I only worked 23.5 that week.

Through no fault of my own, I might add; they closed early on Wednesday and wouldn't let me stay.

This dovetails nicely with my closing point about not having any company loyalty.  It's one thing for a computer not to give you the money because payroll programs do not generally employ fuzzy logic.  But it's quite another when you call your rep, say hey, this is messed up and can you do anything about it? and he tells you he made some calls but nobody's willing to bend for you.

So I lose a full day's pay -- in a week where I was going to be at least one day short ANYWAY -- over a HALF HOUR.  This is one of those things that is not a lot of money for the company but IS a lot of money for me, and is therefore something that I am fucking-well not going to forget.  Think this might cross my mind the next time I get an E-Mail about new job openings?

(Remember a couple Christmases back when my boss was out, told us to leave early on Christmas Eve, and then the manager in the midwest tried to dock our pay for it?  This is pretty much the same thing only I'm getting screwed out of an entire day's pay this time.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on January 07, 2012, 09:34:47 PM
The guy on the closing shift had an emergency he had to attend to, so he left. I got to cover the rest of his shift.

Or I would have, except eleven hours on my bad knee is enough for it to stop functioning entirely as a support for my body. I ended up limping out of the store using a broomhandle as an improvised crutch/cane.

The three-floor stairway was the best part.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on January 08, 2012, 04:10:06 AM
Oh, R^2.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on January 13, 2012, 10:02:52 AM
I woke up this morning, checked my bank account to see if I'd been paid and discovered they'd shorted me about 300 dollars. So I go into the office and check my timecards, I was only paid for 56 hours out of the 80 I actually worked. Sweet. I missed a lot of work last paycheck so I figured there might be some adjustments, but I did the math and I was underpaid last check so I should have had rollover coming with this one... Looked closer. Looks like somebody in workforce management recorded all the hours I worked on christmas/new years as unpaid time off rather than time and a half. :rolleyes:

I get that everyone makes mistakes, but you'd think if you were working with people's fucking paychecks you'd double check your work.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on January 26, 2012, 08:34:59 PM
Because HP gives me so many benefits, I owe money in taxes this year.  ::(:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on January 30, 2012, 12:01:45 PM
I don't have a real desk; I sit at a folding table.  Which is fine for the most part, but the fucking thing collects static like crazy and occasionally discharges it.  To the point that my screen goes black, my keyboard and mouse become unresponsive for several seconds, and yes it shocks the fuck out of me.

I brought my ergo keyboard into work (as I am wont to do) but these moments appeared to affect it particularly badly for some reason; it wouldn't just go dead for a few seconds a few times a week, it would go dead for a measurable period of time several times a day.  So I took it home and switched back to a cheapy comes-with-a-new-computer one.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on January 30, 2012, 12:05:59 PM
My workstation is in the next room over, and my keyboard/monitor/etc. are connected via an ethernet USB extender.... which is prone to flaking out whenever I go all Pikachu, which is often. Static is the worst, man.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 30, 2012, 12:35:16 PM
I don't have that problem at my desk, but for the past two months I have not been able to press the down button on the elevator (we're on the 13th floor) even once without getting a fat shock.

Every. Goddamned. Time.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on January 30, 2012, 01:06:43 PM
The door to the office suite I work in shocks me every time. I have developed a psychological response where I second guess myself when reaching for the door handle and mentally steel myself now.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on January 30, 2012, 01:08:01 PM
Quote
The door to the office suite I work in shocks me every time. I have developed a psychological response where I second guess myself when reaching for the door handle and mentally steel myself now.

Among other things, Office Space taught me the solution to this problem is drill baby drill
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on January 30, 2012, 01:19:57 PM
I don't have a real desk; I sit at a folding table.  Which is fine for the most part, but the fucking thing collects static like crazy and occasionally discharges it.  To the point that my screen goes black, my keyboard and mouse become unresponsive for several seconds, and yes it shocks the fuck out of me.

I brought my ergo keyboard into work (as I am wont to do) but these moments appeared to affect it particularly badly for some reason; it wouldn't just go dead for a few seconds a few times a week, it would go dead for a measurable period of time several times a day.  So I took it home and switched back to a cheapy comes-with-a-new-computer one.

Put a newspaper or some other sort of nonconductive thing between the computer/keyboard/mouse and the table?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on January 30, 2012, 01:24:49 PM
Yeah, probably a good idea.  Maybe I'll cut up a box or something.

(Started using a mousepad; I think it's helped but I'm not 100%.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on January 30, 2012, 02:33:56 PM
we're on the 13th floor

There's your problem.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on January 30, 2012, 03:14:55 PM
Yeah, probably a good idea.  Maybe I'll cut up a box or something.

(Started using a mousepad; I think it's helped but I'm not 100%.)

I used to rest my laptop on a particular chair to hook it up to my friend's TV, and started noticing that I'd get static shocks whenever I touched it.  Then I started putting a magazine between the laptop and the chair, and that stopped happening entirely.  A little insulation probably is exactly the solution you want here.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on January 30, 2012, 05:22:26 PM
Last week, my boss called me asking if I'd be interested in a higher-level position he needed to fill.

Today, I learned he's no longer with the company.

I... huh.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on January 30, 2012, 05:41:31 PM
The Boss is dead, long live Big The Boss.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ocksi on January 30, 2012, 05:44:28 PM
For a moment I was stricken with terror, thinking this was the obituary thread.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on January 30, 2012, 05:48:20 PM
Couldn't be, no links to conspiracy rags claiming Springsteen was a pedo.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on January 31, 2012, 01:56:35 AM
PIKA-CHUUUUUUUU

I've heard that if you ground before the impedance of the air breaks down, and don't have an arc discharge, it's not as bad pain-wise. If you quickly touch whatever it is that usually shocks you and give the difference in charge between your two bodies time to even out, some of the annoyance is gone.

I'd vouch for this, but I don't have any special powers that let me definitively say that I would've been shocked, or that a shock would've been worse had I not employed this method.
Also you have to touch things quickly. It makes you look like a spaz until you start doing it instinctively and smoothly.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 31, 2012, 10:23:26 AM
My response for the past few weeks has been to just press it with my elbow or wrist now, through my coat/shirt.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on January 31, 2012, 10:36:00 AM
Oh c'mon. If you're the only one it happens to, you can adopt a new nickname.

(http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-AyYSc5jA_wc/Tir_fYBQn8I/AAAAAAAAAkQ/QokHGAnUmdY/s1600/shocker.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on January 31, 2012, 10:41:37 AM
...I was on campus the other day and saw this on a sign:

(https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/2/28/PitchforkHandSignal.svg)

Apparently it is supposed to represent a pitchfork.

That is not the thing I thought of when I saw it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on January 31, 2012, 11:30:31 AM
(http://i.imgur.com/MqCLD.jpg)
(http://i.imgur.com/yjUGS.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on January 31, 2012, 02:01:55 PM
Reste digne, Internet.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: NexAdruin on January 31, 2012, 10:54:49 PM
I got a job with surprisingly little (almost 0, in fact!) effort. I deliver pizzas and answer phones and I work with really great people around my age and everything is really laid back and a great time. I love my job.

Sunday, we had a flash snow shower that left really wet, sticky snow over all the street signs. Sunday was my first day making deliveries on my own (besides 1 single run that I did on saturday). I deliver to an area barely a mile outside of the area that I actually know really well. In 4 hours I made about 5 deliveries (on a scale of 1 to 10 that's about a -3 for performance) and got lost twice. Oh and I forgot one poor lady's drinks and had to make that run twice. Also one guy lived on a hill and his driveway was ice-covered cement and I am not really allowed to walk on the grass. I fell on my ass and that hurt.

I was frustrated and upset and when I got home I was ready to cry, but after a half hour of that I felt pretty good about the whole experience. I had a singular bad day and everyone at the shop was cool about it, knowing that first days happen and everything was okay. I was sore from falling but that went away over night and I'd learned a bit which was kind of the point. I love my job, even on bad days.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 02, 2012, 02:23:41 PM
Seen in a case filed today: From the context, the rep meant to type "... phone number of ours" but instead typed "... phone number of ares".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on February 02, 2012, 04:32:41 PM
Uh, Brentai.

Is there still an opening where you work?

I kinda need a job.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 02, 2012, 04:35:20 PM
Seen in a case filed today: From the context, the rep meant to type "... phone number of ours" but instead typed "... phone number of ares".

Update your files, a guy named Kratos lives there now.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on February 03, 2012, 11:39:10 AM
At least three different people have decided that today is the day to wander up and down between all the cubicles having private conversations on their cell phones.  Is it International Fuck Common Courtesy Day or what?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on February 03, 2012, 11:45:53 AM
Oh wait, we're having a Company Super Bowl Party today.

This... shouldn't really equate to International Fuck Common Courtesy Day but it seems natural that it somehow does.

Oh hey now the whole place suddenly smells like nasty ass cabbage.  People really are getting into the spirit of this thing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on February 03, 2012, 12:09:05 PM
Now it's fish.

asdf
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on February 03, 2012, 12:25:43 PM
Counter with your own songs and smells.
Erasure Always (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eSMeUPFjQHc#)
Pokemon - Pokerap (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C0LoHA_FPAs#)
RickRoll'D (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0#)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on February 03, 2012, 03:15:50 PM
Brentai's own smells = chloroform
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on February 09, 2012, 10:03:55 AM
So officially in the HR system, at some point, the name of my department got changed from Development Test Engineering to Development Integration Engineering.

That's right.

Welcome to DIE.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on February 09, 2012, 10:15:30 AM
While I would love to think someone was making a little joke with that, it's much more likely that someone thought it would sound more impressive to clients. "Oh, we don't test things here. We integrate."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on February 09, 2012, 10:36:30 AM
I think it was a knee-jerk reaction to too many developers thinking that having a "Test" department meant they didn't have to do their own testing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on February 09, 2012, 02:00:14 PM
So today I go into work and the manager that opened is freaking out because the store manager is leaving for one of the other stores in the district and starting Saturday the district manager is taking over our store.
Throughout the least productive day I've seen there so far more and more information / rumors get out, and past experience tells me it's a lot less of a "taking over while hiring or grooming the assistant manager" and a lot more "clearing house or the store is closing".

This would all be pretty crappy, except last night I was at a family dinner for my uncle's birthday and my cousin offered me a job at the new office for his construction company that's been making money so fast he's being federally investigated.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on February 09, 2012, 02:01:43 PM
Nothing says "Legit employment opportunity" like federal investigation
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on February 09, 2012, 02:03:29 PM
I think you're missing the important point here: money
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on February 09, 2012, 04:13:47 PM
I don't see what you have to worry about.  It's only your cousin in NYC inviting you into a family-owned business that makes suspiciously too much income and has the Feds nervous.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on February 09, 2012, 04:22:20 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/7rZbt.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on February 09, 2012, 08:49:11 PM
i am trapped in the middle of the most unprofessionally ridiculous high school level bullshit i have ever been a part of

again, i have worked at two comic shops
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on February 09, 2012, 09:05:17 PM
What's the point of the internet if not to dish self-indulgent stories?
I hear that three wrongs make a right, after all.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on February 15, 2012, 07:09:43 AM
...came into work to find my account unexpectedly locked out this morning, for a rather nasty sense of deja vu.

Given that it had apparently been set to expire at the end of the year and they didn't lock me out of the admin account that let me into AD to fix it, I am assuming that this time it was an oversight.  But I should probably double-check at some point.

And today I learned that temps' keycards expire every six months and have to be re-authorized!

The hard way, of course.  The "Come in and the door won't open" way.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on February 15, 2012, 08:59:59 AM
i am trapped in the middle of the most unprofessionally ridiculous high school level bullshit i have ever been a part of

again, i have worked at two comic shops

Let's hear some DEETS, Niku
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on February 15, 2012, 02:40:37 PM
Put in my two weeks. New store manager was super okay with it and the assistant manager was happy I wasn't leaving until after his time off so he didn't care.

It's weird just getting a job. Walking in for the first time, looking at a few spreadsheets of what I'd be doing and walking out knowing I have it a half-hour later.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on February 15, 2012, 04:30:35 PM
i am trapped in the middle of the most unprofessionally ridiculous high school level bullshit i have ever been a part of

again, i have worked at two comic shops

Let's hear some DEETS, Niku

basically got a voice mail saying THERE IS GOSSIP AND YOU ARE FULL OF SHIT and called to investigate and they said TALK TO X IF YOU WANNA KNOW and X was like NO IDEA WHAT'S GOING ON and it's dumb
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on February 15, 2012, 04:55:40 PM
Honestly Niku, I wish you'd made something up.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on February 15, 2012, 05:54:31 PM
i am trapped in the middle of the most unprofessionally ridiculous high school level bullshit i have ever been a part of

again, i have worked at two comic shops

You work at whole foods, I don't think I've ever met anyone more juvenile and drama obsessed than your average hipster.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on February 15, 2012, 06:14:11 PM
well this is between 50+ year old women so

actually

how do i get out of this without sounding incredibly sexist someone help
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on February 15, 2012, 06:36:56 PM
50 year old women are fuckin gossips dawg it's not a secret
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on February 15, 2012, 07:06:42 PM
So hey my boss is taking me to Disneyland next month
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on February 15, 2012, 07:59:38 PM
...
...
Are you their child, close relative, or love interest?
Why?
Is there some sort of procon there?

EDIT:
It occurred to me that procon is something I just made up because I've been watching too much anime and I'm in a fucking delirium. Professional Convention.

EDIT EDIT:
Unfortunately, I am not talking about Delirium beer here.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on February 15, 2012, 08:39:16 PM
Nah, he's just a cool guy.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on February 15, 2012, 10:49:36 PM
WARNING! WARNING! DANGER! DANGER!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Malikial on February 15, 2012, 11:26:33 PM
I think Ted can take care of himself. His boss just wants to be loved.... in the butt.... I may be drunk.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 17, 2012, 04:00:48 PM
The sous of the restaurant I'm in now "strongly" recommended me for a "leading position in the prep area" of a restaurant in Denver near where I'm moving. Which may mean I can transfer over instead of looking for a new job for six to eight months, but uh

Why am I not leading in prep here?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on February 17, 2012, 04:26:05 PM
Nepotism would be my first guess.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on February 17, 2012, 04:50:55 PM
He doesn't want you taking his job.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on February 17, 2012, 07:01:01 PM
Because you make everyone else look bad.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 20, 2012, 06:37:50 PM
Only notes on a case submitted today: "Black guy with a white guys name".

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Silversong on February 21, 2012, 02:56:48 PM
The only co-worker who isn't technically my boss is the bossiest, rudest person to me. She finds like a dozen things a day to tell me I've done wrong, and if I'm not doing enough things wrong she does things like criticize which size paper clip I chose to use. Seriously.
At first it was just obnoxious but now that we're getting into busy season and she's there every day it's ramping up to full-scale misery and she's ruining my entire week. :(
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on February 21, 2012, 03:45:29 PM
Paperclips: serious business.

I think there are a great many jobs that would be great if not for the people.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on February 21, 2012, 03:54:43 PM
Does she also hate on No. 2 pencils?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on February 21, 2012, 05:53:16 PM
Maybe she's just really enthusiastic about stationery.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on February 21, 2012, 06:37:18 PM
Does she also hate on No. 2 pencils?

Man I will cut a bitch for hating on pencils
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on February 21, 2012, 06:57:38 PM
You'd better not use a very long blade then, because the pen is mightier than the sword.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on February 23, 2012, 01:44:07 PM
Another job applied to, another manager actually laughing in my face.
Oh well. Maybe tomorrow will be different.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on February 23, 2012, 04:32:50 PM
Lottel, you gotta look at this from a different angle: Only apply to places managed by tipsy college girls.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on February 23, 2012, 05:01:08 PM
What if they cancel each other out and I lose my powers AND don't get a job?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on February 23, 2012, 06:42:52 PM
At least you can sleep well that night knowing R^2 is banging his new millionairess boss.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 26, 2012, 10:52:48 AM
What I learned today: That a single day of heavy mobile internet use in Australia can cost more than two-hundred and twenty-thousand dollars.

:thebiggestmikey:

That usage was missed due to some technical flaws. And more than wipes out the entire sum of money our dept saved the company for all of last year.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on February 26, 2012, 10:39:05 PM
Remember a few months ago when my old boss invited for me to work over in South Carolina and was willing to put me up for a bit

Well, he facebooked me tonight. Told me he's planning on opening a few more stores. Told me to at least "vacation" there and work for a while.
I've got nothing else. Might as well "vacation,"  right?
I guess I should get money together, maybe.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 27, 2012, 10:43:06 AM
I totally understand desperately grasping at whatever straws are available but man.

South Carolina.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on February 27, 2012, 10:57:27 AM
This is the same place that on a good night I'd make $300 in tips and on a bad night I'd make only $150. And business is booming so every night is a good night.
I'm not going to say "It can't be worse than Decatur hyuk hyuk" because, well, Ottumwa. But surely it's not terrible for a temporary thing?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 27, 2012, 11:04:43 AM
And then Lottel stayed in South Carolina for 50 years.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on February 27, 2012, 07:53:32 PM
I got my first project management assignment today! Granted, it's basically just 'make sure this money is being spent properly', but hey, gotta start somewhere.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on February 29, 2012, 10:48:08 AM
I got an offer letter from a company!  Much better pay, and I gotta move again.

It's gonna be a headache moving, but I'll deal with it.

My new home?  El Paso, TX.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 29, 2012, 12:48:02 PM
Admit it McDohl: Eventually you'll wind up in Mexico.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on February 29, 2012, 01:38:09 PM
Oooh!  I'll be able to smugly sit on my high horse and be a right-wing libertarian!  I can look out my back porch and watch all the brown people derking our jerbs!

It'll be ever so much fun!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 05, 2012, 10:38:05 AM
I don't have a real desk; I sit at a folding table.  Which is fine for the most part, but the fucking thing collects static like crazy and occasionally discharges it.  To the point that my screen goes black, my keyboard and mouse become unresponsive for several seconds, and yes it shocks the fuck out of me.

I brought my ergo keyboard into work (as I am wont to do) but these moments appeared to affect it particularly badly for some reason; it wouldn't just go dead for a few seconds a few times a week, it would go dead for a measurable period of time several times a day.  So I took it home and switched back to a cheapy comes-with-a-new-computer one.

Oh hey, this large wooden object crammed into a corner in the storage cubicle in the next room is in fact an actual straight-up (literally; it is on its side) wooden desk!  Real wood, too, from the weight of it; none of this particle board shit.

Welp, think I know what I'm doing this afternoon after I get the next set of Win7 machines set up.  I've wiped it down and dragged it into my room.  It's wobbly as there is nothing supporting the right-hand side; I suspect this little filing-cabinet thingy wrapped in bubble wrap is supposed to go under that side.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 05, 2012, 10:43:34 AM
So some manager comes bay and asks where his desk is.

Then Thad replies, "No Manager. I am the Managers"

And Thad was the Managers.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 05, 2012, 10:51:29 AM
Could still happen but I did in fact clear it with a superior.

Actually we noticed it as we were going through the area looking for more places to put shit, because management is talking about how, once the pilot is over and we start deploying Win7 to the rest of the company, they want me to double my output (right now I'm doing maybe 5 machines a day; they want 10).  The bottleneck is not me, it's the amount of space I have to put laptops in and the number of ports I have to connect them to.  So guy comes in, starts looking around at space that's being used for storage and could be used for production instead; that's when we notice the desk and I mention I could use it as a desk and use the plastic table to image things on.

I suspect this little filing-cabinet thingy wrapped in bubble wrap is supposed to go under that side.

No, probably not; at a glance it looks taller than the desk.  I don't have a tape measure onhand but I'll grab a cable or something to compare before I drag it in.

Might have to set one corner on top of some kind of load-bearing something.  There's a big empty mini-fridge box out there; I wonder if it would be sturdy enough.  Otherwise I guess I can just stack it on top of a bunch of old computers that we're not redeploying.

EDIT: Nope, checked, and the cabinet thing IS just the right height.  Glad I trusted SCIENCE! instead of my own lying eyes.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on March 05, 2012, 11:26:56 AM
Just use some sugar packets.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 05, 2012, 01:32:37 PM
Well, it's narrower than the plastic table so I'm a little tight on legroom.  (Maybe I'll stick the workstations I'm imaging off to the left and my laptop on the right, opposite of how I'm doing it now; I think that would free up a bit of space.)  But so far I like it okay and have not been shocked yet.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 07, 2012, 06:35:55 PM
One of my coworkers who used to be on my team just found out she's having a boy, so she immediately decided to name him "Westley".  She swears me telling her that that's would I would name a boy has nothing to do with it.  :shrug:

So anyway, that's something.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 07, 2012, 06:48:16 PM
I got my raise! Actually getting Raises is good! :8D:

It comes out to about $16 a paycheck.  ::(:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 07, 2012, 06:55:16 PM
I keep forgetting that not everybody gets paid weekly.  For a moment I wondered what the hell you consider a "good" raise.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 07, 2012, 07:07:04 PM
Even if I was paid weekly, in a town where a gallon of milk costs $6-$7, that's not what you might call a sum likely to make a material difference in our circumstances.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on March 07, 2012, 07:12:29 PM
Why, do you drink more than two and a half gallons of milk per paycheque?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Silversong on March 07, 2012, 07:36:23 PM
Oh hush, you. GameStop gave nickel raises. If you were doing well.

In other news, my coworker inexplicably turned down the bitch dial. Not complaining, just not getting used to it yet.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 08, 2012, 07:57:49 AM
One of my coworkers who used to be on my team just found out she's having a boy, so she immediately decided to name him "Westley".  She swears me telling her that that's would I would name a boy has nothing to do with it.  :shrug:

So anyway, that's something.

Pfff, nobody would be afraid of the "Dread Pirate Westley".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 08, 2012, 08:14:18 AM
Reminder: My family name is Roberts.  I had to bite my lip not to tell the lady "IT DOESN'T WORK THAT WAY FOR YOU."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 08, 2012, 09:21:25 AM
It's like that time Brad named his cat "Stains".

IT DOESN'T WORK WITH AN ANIMAL THAT WON'T COME WHEN IT'S CALLED.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on March 08, 2012, 03:23:32 PM
Is she specifically spelling it "Westley", as opposed to the actual common name of Wesley?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 08, 2012, 03:36:08 PM
Yep.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on March 08, 2012, 03:39:19 PM
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ljxxtfPjA41qe4965o1_250.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on March 08, 2012, 03:45:43 PM
Set fire to her car.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Malikial on March 08, 2012, 03:55:11 PM
Or, you know, you could just congratulate her and be nice.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 08, 2012, 04:00:43 PM
It's not like she put a trademark on it.  I just think it's amusing.

I basically cursed a kid other than my own to have a slightly un-masculine name and a tendency to be told to shut up.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 08, 2012, 05:14:51 PM
Westley? Crush her.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on March 08, 2012, 05:35:49 PM
Okay that's it.

I don't get it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 13, 2012, 07:41:17 AM
Today I discoverd that I work at a place where you open a ticket to have the office fridge cleaned.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 14, 2012, 09:28:17 AM
I brought my ergo keyboard into work (as I am wont to do) but these moments appeared to affect it particularly badly for some reason; it wouldn't just go dead for a few seconds a few times a week, it would go dead for a measurable period of time several times a day.  So I took it home and switched back to a cheapy comes-with-a-new-computer one.

Still happening even on the wooden desk -- no shocks, but the keyboard still periodically drops and only picks back up if I hit the KVM switch a few times.  I suspect it's a problem with the switch.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on March 14, 2012, 04:23:52 PM
Maybe it's a problem... WITH YOU!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on March 15, 2012, 11:01:22 AM
Had to deliver to the mental health care place downtown today. 3 big party platters and 2 sacked lunches and two drinks in an incredibly difficult to balance tower. Our store is currently surrounded by constructions to I had to make my way through the construction and across two streets trying to control the wobbling food. I get to the place and waited for the elevator. And waited. Turns out someone broke it so I had to climb six flights of stairs only to get to the top and have a man tell me I was on the wrong floor. I go down to floor three when a lady behind the counter there told me the man who told me I was on the wrong floor was a patient. So back up to six I go.
I finally get to the right door and am now struggling to stand when the guy I'm supposed to deliver to tells me to wait in the hallway while he finishes his call to his mother. While waiting the five minutes for him to end his phone call, the man who told me I was on the wrong floor comes by and tries to take some food. A nurse rushes up and yells at the man and then me for encouraging him.


I'm not too incredibly fond of my job.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 19, 2012, 09:53:07 AM
I don't think I've been in an office before that I would seriously recommend be shut down for a couple days to prevent the entire staff from getting sick.  Seriously, it's like a plague hospital in here.  The only reason I haven't walked out is that I'm just coming OFF of a major flu, so hopefully my status as a breathing inoculation will cancel some of it out.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on March 19, 2012, 09:55:57 AM
I wish wearing a medical mask was more socially acceptable in the west. It just makes goddamn sense.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on March 19, 2012, 10:45:17 AM
Just as a sign of, "YO! I BE SICK AS HELL"? At the very least?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 19, 2012, 10:55:02 AM
I wish wearing a medical mask was more socially acceptable in the west. It just makes goddamn sense.

Well, it depends on what you're trying to protect yourself against.

I've hit a point where I wear a dust mask when I open up old computers.  It's fucking irritating, but the last time I got a faceful of dust I was sick for weeks, and that's much more irritating.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on March 19, 2012, 11:01:44 AM
Quote from: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Surgical_mask
Outside health care facilities, simple, inexpensive masks of similar appearance are commonly worn in heavily populated centres in East Asia to help prevent spreading the common cold. In Japan, it is common to wear a face mask while sick to avoid infecting others in public settings.[1] Surgical masks were widely used in China, Hong Kong, Vietnam, and Toronto, Canada during outbreaks of the SARS virus, during the 2007 avian bird flu pandemic in Japan, and more recently in the United States and Mexico City during the 2009 H1N1 flu outbreak, also known as the swine flu. It is also worn by people in dusty environments such as sanitation workers.

Either in the case of "I'm sick" or "Everyone around me is sick." when walking around public/work/etc.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 19, 2012, 11:12:56 AM
Yeah, and they did fuck-all against SARS, is my point.  Not sure about bird/swine flu, but the latter at least turned out to be a pretty overblown panic.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 19, 2012, 11:52:08 AM
Fair enough.  Per WebMD (http://www.webmd.com/lung/news/20030429/can-mask-protect-you-from-sars), at least in the case of SARS masks were much more useful if sick people wore them than if healthy people did.  Jon Cohen at Slate (http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/recycled/2009/04/do_surgical_masks_stop_swine_flu.single.html) suggests that Swine Flu was much the same.

So yeah, I guess if you're sick and ABSOLUTELY CANNOT JUST STAY THE FUCK HOME, then by all means you should wear one.  But wearing one isn't going to do much to PREVENT you from getting sick.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 20, 2012, 10:00:08 AM
Well, the good news is, the Win7 rollout is about to begin in earnest.  This is good news because companies do not generally stop in the middle of replacing every single computer in their business.  This is the closest thing a temp can have to job security.

Also good news: the revised estimates are saying this will take until November, which is three months beyond my original contract.

The bad news: That estimate relies on me getting 38 computers out the door every week.

I have enough ports for that, but not enough desk space for all the laptops, and not enough KVM switches for all the desktops.  I have asked for more of these things and hopefully they will be forthcoming.

Even so, while I could feasibly get 20 or so computers done a day if everything ran smoothly, well, it doesn't.  Sometimes policy doesn't get applied properly and computers go into hibernation overnight, interrupting encryption and meaning I have to wait for it all through the next day.  (Or, worse, some of the desktops get stuck and won't boot if that happens and have to be started over.)

And even if that part goes smoothly, SCCM is spotty as hell at actually installing packages.  Sometimes things will go smoothly for a whole week with no problems, and then one day it'll be a mess of machines without their packages installed and we'll have to do them manually.  We've yet to find any pattern to this.

And of course THOSE problems assume I'll have stock to work with in the first damn place.  We're waiting on shipments of new equipment, and for now we've got a good, sizable stack of used equipment.  But as time goes on we're going to have to rely on users returning their old computers so I can reimage and redeploy them -- and let me tell you something about relying on users to put things in boxes, tape them up, stick labels on them, and take them to the mailroom: you can't.

So the good news: the guys I work with have pretty much flat-out said that 38 a week is an impossible goal (at least until we finish our arrangement to have a third party do the imaging and encryption for us so all we've got to do is the package installation and profile migration), and that I should just do my best and we can revise our estimates as we go.

But of course the BAD news is that falling behind schedule will mean more pressure, and yes falling behind schedule is pretty much inevitable.

Ah well.  So it goes; back to it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on March 20, 2012, 11:01:14 AM
I just sold $60 of zombie books to a very good-looking 20-something who just got done doing modelling for DC for Wonder Girl.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on March 20, 2012, 03:01:35 PM
...and your penis is currently inside her?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 20, 2012, 03:10:37 PM
That's a different thread, BB.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on March 20, 2012, 04:33:07 PM
Yes; oh, for the ability to post that in Good Tiiiiiimes.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 20, 2012, 05:56:56 PM
There's a guy at my work who's been there same time as me - a little over a year, which makes us still kind of new, but we're well-established regulars now.

Anyway, he's good at the job and has no trouble, but he actually used to work for the police as a civilian researcher for a unit that worked Credit Card fraud, so this is kind of easy shit for him. He was working hard behind the scenes to get another cop-helper job and he did alright on that front, because after umpty-ump background checks, he landed another one.

Now, his new job will start in June or maybe July, so he's still with us for now, but in the meantime he's basically been trolling management out of sheer boredom. He'll go out and FIND fraud - double the expected monthly totals, as a matter of fact - and cancel the accounts, but that's it. He's come in hours and hours late to see if anyone would notice, he spent a month and a half not putting any of his "kills" in the database (so it looked like he was actually doing no work at all), ignored his phone blocks, whatever. Each time he was caught, he'd play dumb, fix up his "mistake" and find something new to break and they'd add a new item to this list of stuff they were scrutinizing about him. It was pretty funny.

I had to laugh though. Management found the best revenge. Not realizing he's already got a line out, they assumed he's some ADD-riddled wall-bouncer (As bored as he is, I don't think he has ADD, he's very laid back and focused) who needs to be given more complex tasks to "stimulate him", so now they're giving him these huge, complicated, time-sinking jobs to do as if he was a human Jack Russel Terrier. Of course now he has all this awful drudge work to do which will take hours and hours and hours, so the joke's back on him.

I can't say he's being a complete sport about it (he mostly is), but he sees the humour in it at least.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 20, 2012, 08:51:28 PM
That's what you get for rocking the boat.

I've got my busy days and my slow days (and if you graphed my posts per day, you'd probably be able to tell which is which -- hey, do we still have a stats page?).  Today was...well, kinda both.  I didn't have a lot on my plate so I took the time to organize my office.  I moved the shit that was in boxes under a table to drawers in the cube that we just unburied; I moved the WinXP-imaged desktops from on top of that table to underneath, and put my stacks of Win7-imaged laptops on the table where they'd been, organized by model so that I won't have to dig through piles to figure out what the hell my stock is anymore.  And we've got old shit that needs to be decommissioned taking up a lot of shelf space, and used-but-reusable shit that needs to be reimaged taking up a lot of floor space, so I went to work on getting old laptops off shelves, popping their hard drives, taking them out of inventory, and stacking them by the door so we can haul them out for donation.

Let me tell you something about the Thinkpad T60.

Its hard drive is held in by a cover.  The cover is attached by a single screw.

And about one time in four, that fucking screw will not come out.  It just spins in place.  Even if you turn the thing upside down and give it a good whack, the screw doesn't go anywhere.

Anyone who's ever worked on the innards of a computer for more than five minutes can probably see where this is going.

I DID manage to get through almost the entire day without stabbing myself with a screwdriver, deciding that I was done now, and spending the rest of the day reading The Fuller Memorandum.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 22, 2012, 01:09:54 PM
If I got to set IT policy, here are a couple of rules I'd pitch:

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on March 22, 2012, 02:10:51 PM
You should work your way up into a position where you can enact those regulations, just out of spite.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Doom on March 22, 2012, 02:27:28 PM
Thad's Tech Shack

"The Best Service and Fuck You."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 27, 2012, 06:59:13 AM
Hey, these laptops piled up on my floor sure do look a lot like the ones I had sorted and neatly stacked on shelves until you grabbed them last week and said you'd give them to somebody else to work on.

Except now they're no longer sorted, and sitting in piles on the floor.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on March 27, 2012, 07:38:16 AM
Technically, that is still sorting. Of a kind.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on March 27, 2012, 07:51:29 AM
So I came in this morning to a thin project ouline and brand new copy of Microsoft Project on my desk with a note to "get this done".

Two hours later and I'm still not sure what Project does.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 27, 2012, 11:49:44 AM
Clearly it projects things

Like your boss' secret longings >__>
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on March 27, 2012, 03:35:36 PM
It gave me an exact replica of the same thing he gave me except with meaningless bars next to it.

Literally meaningless, I don't actually know how long these steps take so I just made everything last until the next thing started.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on March 27, 2012, 04:07:39 PM
Yep, that's pretty much what you can do with MS Project. It's not bad for tracking completion of tasks, though. :shrug:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 27, 2012, 05:40:03 PM
The idea is that it can track the total effort-hours, cost, and other known variables of a project plan in addition to spitting out a bunch of pretty graphs.

In practice it's just a tool for generating Gantt charts 90% of the time, but PMs tend to consider those as, like, super important, so whatever just roll with it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on March 27, 2012, 05:44:34 PM
Yeah, I started my current job right as the company I work for was replacing Project with PlanView, so my instruction in Project was basically, "Here's MS Project, you don't really need to use it."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 27, 2012, 06:18:35 PM
Background: The process for account investigation is often "Suspicion -> Initial investigation -> Block service if warranted -> Secondary investigation after blocks added -> Account is cancelled (or unblocked) -> Cancelled account is filed in the shit list."

So today was funny.

Manager: "Here is a report we ran of a huge number of accounts you've blocked but have never filed. Please clear these up. Stuff should be entered right away, this is bad and you are bad!" (note: I was by no means the only person who got this email)
Me: *wastes an hour carefully reviewing each account*
Me: "Except for one, these accounts are all ones I was just investigating in the last week or two, and on top of that, they are now all cancelled and filed. Can we maybe please exclude the last two or three weeks next time this report is run? Also any audit should have shown you I file all my stuff immediately after cancelling it [quite a few people do it all at the end of the month]".
Manager: "Well this report is from last week"
Me: "Right. And if you'd sent me this last week, it still would have been irrelevant, only I would have said the investigation was still pending instead of saying they're already cancelled."
Manager: "Well, I didn't make the report I'm just forwarding it derp doop deep!"

:rage:

I think it's funny that we work in a place where everything requires you to be thorough, where thoroughness is part and parcel of the job, but where my manager does zero due diligence before yelling at people in a very hamhanded way and then gets stung for doing so (this is the second time I've had to throw something back at him, others way more). He's done far worse to others so far.

He's a new manager who just started a month and a half ago. He was a senior rep for a while, but he's the son of a VP, so everybody knows he's on the golden boy super-fast promotion track (always bad news). I doubt he'll stay with us more than a year or so before rushing somewhere else. But man, the kid needs to learn basic managerial skills FAST, because he's already doing massive HR rulebreaking. 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on March 27, 2012, 07:22:08 PM
also I hope you got the memo about the cover sheets for the TPS reports

let me just send it to you so you can review it
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 27, 2012, 07:30:08 PM
Yeah, every time I see emails with his name on them I think "Oh great, it's AMATEUR HOUR again."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 01, 2012, 10:40:36 PM
HAHAHA I CAN POST IN THIS THREAD AGAIN.

I got a job at a Jimmy Johns a few weeks back because they were desperate and didn't read my application before they hired me. There are 4 stores in town and I work at the nicest/biggest one. One of the other stores called and asked if I would work 4 to close a few times and I finally said yes.
I get there and it turns out "close" for that store was eleven instead of the 8 at the store I worked out. It also turned out it was only the manager's first week of working. The other two employees had been there for three days.
Night went about as well as you would expect.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 02, 2012, 04:44:28 AM
Let me guess: at least four women offered their bodies to you.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on April 02, 2012, 05:50:26 AM
Hell, I'd offer my body to you for a Club Lulu.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on April 02, 2012, 06:39:46 AM
I wonder why there is a giant sheet of plastic taped over my windows.

And also why one whole wall of my room no longer has power.

It's the one with the switch on it, so I had to daisy chain a couple power strips together to get network access.

(I have some extension cords but it turns out they're two-prong.  Precisely what the hell anybody thought I was going to do with two-prong outlets is anybody's guess.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 02, 2012, 10:47:57 AM
Let me guess: at least four women offered their bodies to you.


Hilarious.



(Only one)


Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 05, 2012, 10:46:07 AM
While driving to work today I spotted an old coworker crossing the street. I've narrowed down the places we could have worked together down to a possible three different places.
I really do need to work at a place that stays open longer than 6 months.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on April 05, 2012, 05:32:44 PM
While driving to work today I spotted an old coworker crossing the street. I've narrowed down the places we could have worked together down to a possible three different places.
I really do need to work at a place that staysstop cursing the places I work so they stay open longer than 6 months.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on April 06, 2012, 02:36:40 PM
Starting my new job (old job new place w/e)  means a lot of ten-plus hour days, followed by unloading and unpacking and trying to settle in. I lost my knee braces in the move, too.

I am beyond the Tired event horizon. 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 10, 2012, 12:49:56 PM
There's something just wrong about delivering to someone named Lolita at a grade school parking lot.
Luckily it was a teacher. I think.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 10, 2012, 12:56:58 PM
(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-0xToZLlI3Eo/Tgx1Bj9m9sI/AAAAAAAAI78/AyEFs0OkJkw/s1600/chris_hansen.gif)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on April 10, 2012, 03:26:13 PM
This only reinforces the theory that you live in an anime.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 11, 2012, 10:10:32 AM
Crazy lady tried purposefully tried to ram my car in a parking lot today. I had to circle the parking lot driving backwards and take a sharp turn in order to escape her. I was making my way back to the store when a car comes out of nowhere and merges 4 lanes into the lane I was in. The only other car on the road was right beside me so I had to slam on my brakes. The car then swerved back over to the right and stayed in the farthest right lane.


I work again tonight. And had just signed up for two more double shifts this week.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 11, 2012, 10:37:45 AM
I have decided that any hour-long call recived with less than five minutes remaining in your phone block (or shift) will henceforth be known as "getting a Roger Murtagh".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 11, 2012, 12:42:15 PM
Aw, c'mon, Mongrel, you're not THAT old.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 11, 2012, 01:55:33 PM
Well, I may not be two days from retirement, but I was five minutes from break time.

(Alternately, you could argue I'll ALWAYS be two days from retirement).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on April 12, 2012, 09:05:46 AM
I have never been so literally told "whenever I tell you to do something, check with me to make sure that's what I want you to do".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 14, 2012, 11:16:40 PM
It occurred to me today that, of the three people in my team, the guy pursuing a degree in Software Engineering is the one creating low-level frameworks and experimental tools like remote hardware manipulation and embedded languages for automation, and the two guys who have an M.S. in Computer Science are the ones applying them to specific applications.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 16, 2012, 09:34:20 AM
God damn it, it's halfway through April and the environment in this building is still actively making people sick.  I feel like calling somebody about it but it seems like a bad idea on a number of levels.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 16, 2012, 09:57:55 AM
Why?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on April 16, 2012, 10:48:40 AM
Um. Its his job. He is at best middle management. He needs the money. People there like him. He presumably respects his immediate supervisor. I could go on but that's just the first few reasons I could come up with off the top of my head.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 16, 2012, 10:56:57 AM
Clarification: why does it seem like a bad idea?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ocksi on April 16, 2012, 11:01:40 AM
Because if the reason people are getting sick is outside of management's direct control, the people you would call to deal with the problem would cost the company a significant amount? Because if it is within management's control, the people he would call would be THEIR superiors and there is no way to look good while going over your boss' head to question his actions?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on April 16, 2012, 11:37:28 AM
God damn it, it's halfway through April and the environment in this building is still actively making people sick.  I feel like calling somebody about it but it seems like a bad idea on a number of levels.

This seems to be an industry thing and no employer really seems to think that the reliability of personnel is ever worth the cost of air filters and mold cleanup.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on April 16, 2012, 12:56:40 PM
We changed proxy servers and now Internet Explorer is the only usable browser. I think my IT department accidentally woke up IN THE YEAR 2000.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 17, 2012, 05:52:14 PM
Apparently this test rack was already running an automated sleeper script that was set to run the Yogi Bear movie on every screen after about 30 minutes.

So now I'm sitting here after hours, surrounded on all sides by the Yogi Bear movie.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 21, 2012, 06:21:01 PM
Dear fraudsters,

If you're going to try and steal [some dude]'s ID to try and sign up for fake accounts, you probably shouldn't add 'fuck.[somedude]@hotmail.com' as an email address.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 25, 2012, 07:47:31 AM
"customer disputing LD [long-distance] calls to labia"

:whoops:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on April 25, 2012, 08:28:08 AM
I know the feeling, I spent most of my teenage years making long-distance calls to labia. ( ._.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Silversong on April 25, 2012, 01:58:05 PM
Sadly, I missed this by a few minutes, but this morning the receptionist accidentally set off the security alarm, and while she was calling the company to get it shut off a giant male turkey, angered by the beeping, started persistently pecking at the door.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on April 25, 2012, 07:31:09 PM
LIFE IN KALAMAZOO!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Malikial on April 29, 2012, 03:03:32 AM
Just worked an all night post prom... went well until close when 2 girls got FORGOTTEN BY THEIR PARENTS and the teachers and us waited around so long the teachers just pooled their money and bought them a cab home, with the permission from the one's mom who was the only parent they could get a hold of, but this was because she was AT WORK and by virtue of being at work, could not come to pick them up.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Zaratustra on May 02, 2012, 05:41:06 AM
Feature request added: 04/29/2012
Target version: April major release

This is the sort of shit I put up with daily.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on May 02, 2012, 06:16:44 AM
You can do it, Zara! There's still ti-

:oh:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on May 02, 2012, 07:25:15 AM
Got my annual evaluation from the Nashville restaurant. With several "does not meet expectations", I was rated the fourth prep cook out of five in competency.

Fun fact: Between the time of my first evaluation and this one, I exclusively washed dishes. That is part of the reason why I left.

Another fun fact: Between the time of my first evaluation and this one, there were six prep cooks in the kitchen not counting me because I was a dishwasher. That they hired two more while I was scrubbing plates was the other reason I left.

:whoops: I guess
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 02, 2012, 02:34:00 PM
Note seen on an account (yes, this was the whole note):

"lady no speak kept on ssaying yess yess..."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on May 02, 2012, 07:27:44 PM
Walked into work tonight and my boss said he was promoting me to manager. I declined.
Manager is a lot of extra work for less pay than what I make with tips. Why I would I willingly take that hit?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on May 02, 2012, 07:31:22 PM
Prestige.
It looks better on a resume.
Assuming your boss is "on the level" it means they recognize you're competent and responsible.

It could also mean they want you to take the fall for something big.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 02, 2012, 09:11:02 PM
Pretty much what Classic said.

I declined a promotion to management once -- that was at the really fucked-up two-man operation where I wound up pretty much running the show anyway.

I don't regret it, but I let the stress get to me enough that I blew a Google interview by bringing it up.

Live and learn.

My boss at my last long-term job constantly complained about how he'd been promoted; he was convinced they'd set him up to take the fall for a coming restructuring (and I'm not sure he was joking when he said it was because he was black).  Thing is that he may very well have been right.

Last I heard he'd been busted back down to tech after they laid off all the temps and the most recent hires.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on May 02, 2012, 09:37:19 PM
Last I heard he'd been busted back down to tech after they laid off all the temps and the most recent hires.

Which of course, looks way bad. [spoiler]But apparently not as bad as being black in Arizona.[/spoiler]
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on May 03, 2012, 06:00:07 AM
I tried drawing a (http://i.imgur.com/RTzmV.png) on a lady's cake yesterday, but it ended up looking like a turtle wearing a wig.

Icing is tricky.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 11, 2012, 03:54:41 PM
I think I've exhausted the supply of people here who might be interested in working for a functionally broken but supernaturally profitable company, but my org just specifically put out an all-points on a couple of open positions so I figured I'd pass it along.  Give me a holler if you or someone you know doesn't mind moving to (probably) California and has one of the following:

* 5+ years IT experience.
* 8+ years product support experience.
* 8+ years data architecture/web development experience.
* 5+ years system engineering experience.
* 3+ years certification engineering experience.

...what?  You never know.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on May 11, 2012, 04:54:39 PM
Even if you hired me I'd just end up washing dishes.

(Hey guys guess how they gave me more hours next week.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Dooly on May 11, 2012, 05:30:01 PM
That job listing calls for 29 years of experience, and I wonder how many people here are even more than five years older than that.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on May 11, 2012, 05:33:21 PM
Quote
has one of the following:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 11, 2012, 06:35:11 PM
I'll let you find the irony in that statement yourself.

(It's not the typo, which I just noticed.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 11, 2012, 06:40:55 PM
You attempt the rare and highly dangerous 2x :thad: COMBO.

Whe're doing it, man.
Whe're MAKING THIS HAPPEN.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on May 11, 2012, 06:51:48 PM
Ha! That's what I get for being an ass while drinking. CARRY ON, THEN.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 11, 2012, 09:59:38 PM
...well, I've got the IT.  You still got my resume?  It's...pretty much the same as it was a year ago except I'm at a different place doing the same shit.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 12, 2012, 05:00:33 AM
Dooooooo it.

I mean California is no picnic, but shit, anything's better than the state you're in right now.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on May 12, 2012, 06:57:32 AM
Figured out how to bypass the network firewall at work. I feel like the goddamn batman.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 16, 2012, 01:29:52 PM
Dear Stupid Luser,

Hey, I get it -- plastic shipping sleeves are tough to figure out.

I mean, there's this flap, right?  And it says "Sender: You must seal flap before sending."  And below that it says "Press here to seal."  But there are no instructions anywhere on what the RECIPIENT is supposed to do, or how you can OPEN it after it's sealed.

So obviously the smart thing to do was to rip the pouch open with your fingers to remove the shipping label, and then Scotch-tape your own shipping label on top of it.  And then add a couple more random and unnecessary strips of packing tape, to make it as much of a pain in the ass as possible for me to remove the pouch you mangled and stick a new one on.

Oh, also, nice job packing your laptop up.  Not only did you leave the battery in it, but I especially like the way you put everything in pretty much the opposite way of how I packed your new laptop.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on May 16, 2012, 07:10:35 PM
So today I witnessed an attempted murder at work today. That was cool.



Ok. If I leave the story there, you guys will yell at me. There was an old man sitting in a booth when I got there who was apparently the neighbor of one of my coworkers. This man is mentally disturbed and is sort of fighting with my coworker, Ron. Well apparently while my Ron was working, this old man turned on all the gas in both apartments and then left knowing Ron is a smoker and would be home shortly. Well, Ron took a long time getting home so it had filled up way too much and he was coughing and getting dizzy as soon as he opened his door. So he called to check up on his deranged neighbor and the cops, the fire department, an ambulance, and no less than 4 social workers crowded into the tiny little place that I work.
This has been the third crazy person being escorted out of the building by police/whatever this week.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 16, 2012, 08:24:17 PM
...okay, so that makes my complaining about people not knowing how to open a plastic flap sound a little petty.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on May 16, 2012, 08:31:58 PM
Actually, it's alright. With the shop filled with people not eating, I got a lot of my inshop work done. Crazy people scare away those pesky customers, you see.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 16, 2012, 08:58:56 PM
To say nothing of the fact that if we start doing qualitative evaluations of each others complaints, we all lose when compared to say R^2, Nex, or Lyrai.

I wouldn't sweat a little bitching between friends, Thad.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on May 16, 2012, 10:23:34 PM
Yeah, compared to Lottel's, yours was just

(http://hearmespeak.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/horatio460.jpg)

A little flap.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 17, 2012, 06:51:46 AM
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAH
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on May 17, 2012, 01:09:16 PM
http://mirrors.rit.edu/instantCSI/ (http://mirrors.rit.edu/instantCSI/)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 17, 2012, 01:37:46 PM
Let's face it: We should just get an emote for that thing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 21, 2012, 12:15:26 PM
Beer and patios for lunch and when I came back one of the guys here bought everyone king-size freezies.

Fuck yeah, I love working weekends.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 22, 2012, 10:03:55 AM
Reimaged a laptop we'd recently gotten back; found that the mouse nub wasn't working.  No driver issues in Device Manager.

So I rebooted and found that both the nub AND the trackpad had been disabled in BIOS.

Now, I can understand disabling the trackpad -- it's a lot more convenient than taping a business card over it.

But disabling the trackpad AND the nub?  I can only think of two good reasons to do that.

One is that you're running a pure command-line environment.

And the other is that you want to keep the guy who does the builds on his toes.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 23, 2012, 10:47:10 AM
You know, I've been doing this shit awhile -- three and a half years (Jesus), off and on.

But today marks the first time I have ever unboxed a laptop to find the user DID NOT POWER IT DOWN BEFORE SHIPPING IT.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on May 23, 2012, 10:53:02 AM
... how could you tell? Wouldn't the batteries run out?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 23, 2012, 10:58:46 AM
Didn't on this one; it came from California and was still in sleep mode.

But yes, it is entirely possible that this HAS happened before and this is just the first time it's still had a charge left by the time it got to my desk.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on May 23, 2012, 11:00:38 AM
Most laptops, by default, go into a power-save ("sleep") mode after being idle for something to the tune of 20 minutes. A fresh "8-hour" battery can last close to a week on this minimal power mode.
Some laptops automatically hibernates the machine. Which I think shuts down the machine entirely with instructions to basically do a state-restore to when it got shut down rather than a proper rebooting.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 23, 2012, 11:36:21 AM
Yeah, this was sleep, though, not hibernate; came right back up when I opened the lid.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on May 24, 2012, 01:12:48 PM
Today was my first day of actual, paid, overtime because "there's a lot going on and we'll need you around".

I spent 98% of the day on Cracked. (2% here)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on May 24, 2012, 04:38:33 PM
Today was my first day of actual, paid, overtime because "there's a lot going on and we'll need you around".

I spent 98% of the day on Cracked. (2% here)

They pay me 6% extra per check (around 130 or 140 a month) to work weekends.

I spend about 15 minutes of each 8 hour shift on the weekend actually working. THe other 7 hours and 45 minutes are spent playing DCSS and reading cracked/reddit.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on May 24, 2012, 05:17:33 PM
I get a small premium for working weekends (roughly $40 a week), and do perform less work, though there's not much difference between that and a weekday.

The main real benefit is the four day weeks (10 hour shifts feel almost exactly the same to me as 8 hour shifts), which gives me an extra day off and only two days a week where managers look over my shoulder. To be fair, our managers are not bad at all... I just don't like being watched.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on May 24, 2012, 06:19:45 PM
Tonight I made $70 in tips! It also was the busiest night I've worked and every trip was 3 or 4 deliveries in opposite corners of the map.
I'd've traded half those tips for a normal night.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on May 24, 2012, 06:46:18 PM
Discussing the burdens of confectionary work:

"You know how you're supposed to get that sheen when you temper your chocolate right?"
"I've never gotten that sheen. The closest I've gotten is an Esteves."

No one even noticed. ::(:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on May 24, 2012, 07:47:58 PM
Heh.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on May 24, 2012, 08:04:27 PM
Maybe they figured you were working with subpar Mexican chocolate.

(which would probably count as irony)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 25, 2012, 10:11:07 AM
Impromptu 2-hour meeting at the end of the day on a Friday before a 3-day weekend.

Bra-fucking-vo.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Silversong on May 26, 2012, 03:32:30 PM
My office shut down at 2:30 due to the impending 3-day weekend, and we still got paid for 8 hours!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 26, 2012, 03:45:07 PM
Trade you.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on May 26, 2012, 03:47:20 PM
I found out the crazy conspiracy theory nut slash ron paul supporter slash Occupy protestor????? I sit next to at work finally got fucking fired.

I was sympathetic to his wife but secretly... othankgod  :perfect: :perfect: :perfect: :perfect: :perfect: :perfect: :perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on May 30, 2012, 10:46:35 PM
I delivered one meager sandwich to the police station today. I usually do this once or twice a day so it's normally no big deal. You go into the lobby, go to the phone, and press the police button. I did all that and the lady said she didn't think anyone at the department had the last name I was delivering to. I told her I'm sure there is a lady there by that name. I've seen it before at this address and she even paid with a credit card. The lady said she'd check and send her out. 30 minutes go by and I press the button again and tell her I'm really sorry but I have several other deliveries and was wondering if I could just leave it in a dropbox or something. She said she checked and no one worked there by that name so, confused, I apoligized for wasting her time and went onto my other deliveries, which were quite late by this point in time.
I called the other deliveries and apologized and 30 minutes later, I was back in the store just in time for the police station delivery to call about her food. So I went back and waited another 20 minutes for her to walk out the doors and explained the whole thing. It turns out the person on the other end of the phone didn't even ask anyone or check anything. She just hung up and ignored the fact I called.
Combine this with the fact one driver lost his car and the other driver got into a wreck today so he can't drive anymore on top of the fact the added 18 hours to my schedule without asking me and today wasn't that great of a day.


(sorry if this doesn't make sense, I had a few drinks tonight. I'll check for coherency and whatnot in the morning.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 31, 2012, 02:23:31 PM
Shipped a computer out the second week of April.

Got a message saying that the user couldn't set it up because she was out on leave until June, and so the office was going to send it back to us.

Which they finally got around to doing just in time for us to get the computer back on MAY 31.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Silversong on May 31, 2012, 03:18:10 PM
Typewriters. Why do they still exist. Why am I expected to know how they work.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on May 31, 2012, 03:50:38 PM
They make awesome auxilliary percussion.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on May 31, 2012, 06:36:14 PM
Type every word you know!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on June 07, 2012, 04:48:01 PM
I waas on a long, boring conference call today, the kind that required my presence but not my input. Luckily, I had my slinky to keep me entertained! I was pretending to be an elephant when one of the project managers I work for/with walked by. :whoops:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on June 08, 2012, 02:07:05 PM
There's something to be said for starting early on a literal non-stop movement day during which I haven't gotten any of my daily tasks done. Then finally sitting down for a minute... at the table still covered in blueprints laid out exactly as they were after staying two hours late to print and correct them the night before.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on June 08, 2012, 02:10:31 PM
Scheduled twelve hours next week. That gives me a lot of time to start looking for a new job!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on June 11, 2012, 07:26:59 PM
My boss swears he saw two UFOs last night and took video. We talked about it for a while and eventually he said "You know, I thought about how you could be in alien in disguise sent to make me paranoid and crazy." So I just said "Then I'd say I was doing my job properly" and walked out of the room backwards.

He later told me that he was thinking about asking if I could get a raise.
:perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 11, 2012, 09:22:25 PM
...for which job?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on June 11, 2012, 11:02:44 PM
X Files Theme Tune (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JDZBgHBHQT8#)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on June 12, 2012, 12:20:53 PM
There's another me* at my company, but for one specific job. The only real interaction I've had with him is the knowledge that every day he's supposed to be sending me daily hour and work break-downs. He has never had one in on time.

Now, the job has him, one supervisor for half, and another for the other half who also handles the higher administrative stuff for the job site. So I was willing to believe he was just getting a ton of crap from both of them and since the original guy was never sending me them on time anyway, it can't all be this kid's fault, right?

Then the next week I start getting them in (from the last week, but still, started getting them). None of the sheets were right, ever. There were always people left off I knew had to be there, wrong times, people showing up at both sides of the job at the same times. Basically, things that if anyone there had actually looked at these sheets would stand out. Whenever I emailed one of these problems back, they would just send a new sheet with the information I gave them on it and nothing else changed (even other problems with the same employee I just hadn't listed yet).

That brings us to his third week here. Now employees have gotten paid for hours based off these schedules and almost all of them have issues. Anyone who has an issue is immediately just paid the amount they say they're owed. Much like with everything else here, my cries out questioning why I have to use more time to check paysheets to timesheets that I then have to take the time to correct based off third-hand knowledge and which clearly don't matter anyway fall on deaf ears.

Cut to today. Still haven't gotten most of last week's sheets, (and am still getting complaints about the hours not being finalized yet even though I tell everyone constantly I don't have the sheets, which I'm told I need before finalizing anything) and other me shows up. At which point he spends over half-an-hour poorly explaining something that an email could have said in a two sentence email, then proceeds to sit and play on his phone as I work on everything he needs (which is now a top priority over actual, important things that also don't relate to a job with its own personal me since he's looking at me funny between texts). When I finally get everything finished, printed, prepared and handed to him, he calls the main guy from his job and asks if he can just go home now since it took so long. Of course he can, and just leave the prints here since he'll be in in the morning to see them anyway.

So one question answered I guess, it is in fact everyone at that job with no sense of time management or efficiency.


*no real training or skill in the field but hired from nepotism for general office bitch needs.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on June 14, 2012, 10:33:18 AM
Hey, uh, you guys sure you want me to ship this Priority Overnight to our Paradise Valley office?

Because I'm not quite sure how much that costs but if you want to split the difference and just pay me to walk it over there, I'd be happy to do it even in this heat.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 16, 2012, 03:55:18 PM
Hey dumbass. If you're going to try and get out of your contract by transferring it to a made up person, you probably shouldn't use YOUR OWN SOCIAL INSURANCE NUMBER on the fake account. You know... the number we already have ON FILE ON YOUR OWN ACCOUNT.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 17, 2012, 03:20:27 PM
"This customer has no contact number because he is calling from the internet. "
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Zaratustra on June 18, 2012, 07:17:59 AM
So apparently the higher-ups have decided most of what I've worked on for the last year will not be used in the product after all.

Also, I constantly get screwed off job opportunities because I can't name design patterns or methodologies and have mostly learned programming by programming.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on June 18, 2012, 07:41:03 AM
So apparently the higher-ups have decided most of what I've worked on for the last year will not be used in the product after all.

I have mostly resigned myself, at this point, to the possibility that absolutely anything I do is subject to being completely thrown out at a moment's notice.  I've gotten pretty good at shrugging it off.

Also, I constantly get screwed off job opportunities because I can't name design patterns or methodologies and have mostly learned programming by programming.

This, on the other hand, I have not learned to be sanguine about at all.  This pisses me right the hell off.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 18, 2012, 10:02:14 AM
The inconvenient truth about software-engineering-not-computer-science is that it's more important to be able to communicate what you're doing than it is to actually be able to do anything.  If you're going into an implementation rather than an R&D position then it's fair for your manager to want you to be able to speak roughly the same language.

The propensity for most managers to themselves be terrible candidates for the position and weigh heavily in favor of people who only sound like they know what they're talking about is a separate issue.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on June 18, 2012, 10:21:58 AM
Weeeeell, I don't think that it is.

Christ knows I understand the importance of a shared lexicon, but if I can explain what I'm doing, coherently, in plain English (and I can), then I question the importance of buzzwords like "agile development" and "LAMP".  (Nebulous fucking horseshit like "the cloud", though, IS a separate issue.)  A convenient shared shorthand is a good thing to have -- it's also something you can learn on the job.

The point, I think, is that interview preparation resembles nothing so much as last-minute cramming for a vocab test, and is just about as accurate a gauge of actual knowledge and understanding of the material.

Stross had a post not long ago about the importance of editors being a lot more than simply correcting typos.  A commenter said something along the lines of "But if you don't know what the phrase 'Oxford comma' means then you shouldn't be looking for a job as an editor."

While I think it's probably a good idea to know vocabulary like "Oxford comma", I am viscerally opposed to the notion that it should be make-or-break.  If you're looking for a job as an editor I think it's pretty much a certainty that you're familiar with the question of whether to put a comma before "and", and that matters a fuck of a lot more than whether you know what it's called.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on June 18, 2012, 01:00:44 PM
...while I would definitely rather be me than a FedEx support guy right now, it is FUCKING INCONVENIENT having to write these labels out by hand.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on June 19, 2012, 10:54:59 AM
One thing about being cut down to part-time hours is that it gives me plenty of time to look for a job that won't do that. My first interview since I started looking is on Thursday -- less than a week after I started looking. This is somewhat encouraging, usually it takes me at least a month of jobsearching to get even one interview.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 20, 2012, 09:39:58 AM
I got an automated HR request to fill out a 10-question survey on our HR website. I get these a lot, but usually ignore them, figured I'd do one for the hell of it.

Easily the best question: "Would you recommend our HR website to other employees?"

I don't know, would I recommend, say, working here to other employees? Would I recommend getting paid to other employees? Would I recommend BREATHING to other employees?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on June 20, 2012, 10:24:03 AM
Well, would you?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 20, 2012, 12:18:56 PM
Sommmmmmmmme of them, yes. Others, not so much.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on June 21, 2012, 12:11:56 PM
The man I migrated to Windows 7 this afternoon has a Confederate flag hanging on the wall of his office.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on June 21, 2012, 12:15:43 PM
I got an automated HR request to fill out a 10-question survey on our HR website. I get these a lot, but usually ignore them, figured I'd do one for the hell of it.

Easily the best question: "Would you recommend our HR website to other employees?"

I don't know, would I recommend, say, working here to other employees? Would I recommend getting paid to other employees? Would I recommend BREATHING to other employees?

I think that's convoluted HR speak for 'do you think our website is terrible for the people who have to use it?

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on June 21, 2012, 05:56:38 PM
So, uh, someone tried to mug me again today. First time in Decatur!
I got out of my car and crossed an alleyway to get to the apartment and two guys were getting high in the alley. One guy goes "YO. YOU GOT SAMMIES?" I gestured to the uniform and bag of sandwiches in my hand. And then it happened. The dude pulled out a fake gun and said "Gimme the sammies or I shoot you so fast you freak." I just laughed and shoved him out of my way and kept walking.

It didn't occur to me later I should've said "Don't shoot. I have an imaginary wife and kids."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Silversong on June 21, 2012, 06:43:43 PM
Does Lottel's existence really count as "real life"?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 21, 2012, 08:11:54 PM
So just how fake was this gun? Did it still have an orange plastic cap on the muzzle?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on June 21, 2012, 08:16:36 PM
No. It was pretty realistic. To the point where when I got into the apartment, I paused and thought "Wait. Was that a real gun?" 90% sure it was fake judging by the way the guy waved it. Also, it was shinier than the other guns I've seen on the job.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on June 21, 2012, 08:33:26 PM
it was shinier than the other guns I've seen on the job.

 :pop:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 21, 2012, 10:32:00 PM
Lottel's current avatar is about as appropriate as it gets!

(http://i.imgur.com/QH6JG.png)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on June 22, 2012, 08:05:11 PM
Does Lottel's existence really count as "real life"?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on June 28, 2012, 08:06:35 PM
One-oh-five in the shade today with 60-70% humidity. I get called in 3 hours early and have no back up on apparently one of the busiest days of the year so far. Took roughly 40 deliveries between 3 and 8. Since I was just starting and stopping all the time, my air conditioning wasn't doing much and having windows down didn't do anything.


On the plus side, I got a silver-backed $2 bill, which is sort of neat I guess.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on June 28, 2012, 08:18:31 PM
Always look for the silver backing, eh?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on June 29, 2012, 07:47:37 AM
I'm not sure at what point "get loss payee added to that form" turned into "broker peace talks with equipment rental company".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on June 30, 2012, 04:53:20 PM
Turned in my letter of resignation today. When they asked me why, I simply reminded them that today is my twelfth consecutive day off.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 30, 2012, 04:57:45 PM
Please tell me they said "We're going to miss you" at some point.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on June 30, 2012, 04:58:51 PM
Or alternatively guilt tripped you about you quitting and having to replace you.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on June 30, 2012, 08:21:20 PM
Nah, there's still plenty of time for that over the next two weeks though. Everyone else is going on vacation so I actually have some hours to work there. For now. :V
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 02, 2012, 07:49:07 PM
I had to deliver to the top floor of a tall building and the elevators where broken. So I climbed all the way up and made it through a labyrinth of a office floor to find the lady and then couldn't find the same stairwell. I made it into one and got all the way down and noticed none of the doors had handles. They were all locked doors with no handles. So I climbed back up all the flights of stairs and there's no way out. I was locked in a stuffy, unair-conditioned stairwell for about 40 minutes before someone found me.

My legs hurt, guys.


AND while typing this my boss called and said ghosts attacked the store. A ghost thew a sign down some stairs and another (but maybe the same ghost) toppled over a high chair.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Defenestration on July 03, 2012, 01:09:16 AM
Lottel, there are no ghosts.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 03, 2012, 01:22:08 AM
We DID have a ghost convention right across the street last week.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 03, 2012, 07:38:43 AM
Well, whatever you do, just don't cross the streams.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 04, 2012, 05:43:22 AM
My first training day at work is cushy time-and-a-half holiday pay.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 04, 2012, 08:49:46 AM
Oh hey, you got a new job already?

That is... better than previous instances!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 04, 2012, 11:59:43 AM
I know, right?

Job search in Atlanta: Five months, no success, move to Nashville.

Job search in Nashville: Five months, eventual success.

Job search in Denver: Two weeks.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on July 04, 2012, 12:14:35 PM
A place where you can get a job after only two weeks of searching seems like a fossil in this day and age.

I guess Denver really is the last dinosaur.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on July 04, 2012, 01:49:07 PM
A place where you can get a job after only two weeks of searching seems like a fossil in this day and age.

I guess Denver really is the last dinosaur.

(http://fc00.deviantart.net/fs51/f/2009/324/3/c/Smiley_Face_by_Mitsukuni3.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on July 04, 2012, 03:23:44 PM
Total Recall - Two Weeks (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V17duGlHEYY#noexternalembed)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 04, 2012, 06:51:22 PM
Wait wait... I think I've figured this one out.

Isn't the entire state of Colorado on fire right now?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 05, 2012, 03:24:42 AM
It's true. I'm no longer absorbing the misfortune of the entire state I live in.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 05, 2012, 06:14:32 AM
So, your problems are solved, but only if you agree to live in a hellish wasteland damned by the gods.

Sounds about right.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 05, 2012, 07:06:27 AM
I actually live in the part of the state not currently on fire. You're thinking of Bongo Bill.

Or Nickasummers, I think.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on July 05, 2012, 08:35:36 AM
So, your problems are solved, but only if you agree to live in a hellish wasteland damned by the gods.

Sounds about right.

More like his problems are solved as long as the misery of those in the surrounding area is proportional to the misery he himself would be suffering. If it takes the scorching of thousands of square miles of America's most cherished, pristine parks and lands (plus Colorado Springs) for R^2 to get a job, well then so be it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 05, 2012, 09:26:45 AM
Starr's take was that all the smoke is obscuring God's view, so he's having trouble aiming the lightning bolts.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on July 06, 2012, 08:29:11 AM
Stupid customer thread at Reddit (http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/vmoaq/yesterday_a_woman_asked_me_if_her_phone_case/t3_vmoaq); there goes your Friday.

Via Doctorow (http://boingboing.net/2012/07/06/my-stupidest-moment-as-a-custo.html), who decides to be a good sport and tell a story where HE was the stupid customer.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on July 06, 2012, 08:40:11 AM
:facepalm: mfw I realize I'm probably the only person here without a Friday to blow.

:facepalm: mfw I realize what the hell I just typed.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 06, 2012, 08:46:44 AM
The "depressing" quotient of those threads are higher enough than the "funny/interesting" quotient that I am (sadly) safe from such lures.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on July 06, 2012, 10:15:01 AM
Stupid customer thread at Reddit (http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/vmoaq/yesterday_a_woman_asked_me_if_her_phone_case/t3_vmoaq); there goes your Friday.

:tldr:

(http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ljz5bnAGgr1qidrtmo1_1280.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on July 09, 2012, 04:55:00 PM
At the insistence of one of our VPs, my department's website now has frames.

It should be noted that I work in IT.

::(: :facepalm: :endit:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on July 10, 2012, 06:28:36 AM
AC is out.

That's okay, today's forecast high is only 114 degrees.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on July 10, 2012, 07:58:11 PM
youarealreadydead.jpg
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on July 17, 2012, 06:43:14 AM
So if there's a coworker you like that needs your help working on something you have already put off, what's the nice way of telling them you don't want to waste time on it because they're being fired next week anyway?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 17, 2012, 06:48:59 AM
That you'll have the chance to get to it next week?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 18, 2012, 10:16:38 PM
My new boss started today.
Basically all you need to know about her is:
It's the beginning of the end, my friends.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 19, 2012, 03:28:03 AM
  • Before I left for the night she said twice I was attractive.

:romodog:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 19, 2012, 04:32:31 AM
More like :lottel:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on July 19, 2012, 06:32:10 AM
The budget director brought me a spaghetti squash from her garden today!

I had to report it as a gift because there are limits to how much I can accept from auditees, and clearly someone higher up knows how easily I can be bribed with produce.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 19, 2012, 10:36:33 AM
From what I know of people with squash plants, once they start harvesting they have to find anyone possible to take some off their hands or they drown in delicious squashy goodness.

But mmm, spaghetti squash.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on July 19, 2012, 11:26:32 AM
My new boss started today.
Basically all you need to know about her is:
  • She's the kind of person that tells you she's the kind of person that _____ every few minutes
  • Believes that since she's never been a manager before she has to show she's tough to get respect so she's completely changing my job.
  • She's taking the place of the boss I really liked.
  • Before I left for the night she said twice I was attractive.
It's the beginning of the end, my friends.

Sleep your way to the top while you still can!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on July 19, 2012, 11:55:54 AM
He has a point. You're not getting any younger.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Silversong on July 19, 2012, 01:51:23 PM
It's Lottel. If anyone around here was going to discover the Fountain of Youth in his bidet it would be him.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on July 19, 2012, 01:58:35 PM
He's already got all the ladies lining up to be squirted with his baby-making juice, so why not?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 20, 2012, 03:42:20 PM
My new boss is angry at me for not having enough fun at work. This comes an hour after telling me she's changing my job and saying I need to master both jobs or I'm fired.
And after two hours listening to her prattle on about how she's boy crazy and needs a man.

How can I NOT be having fun in such an environment?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 20, 2012, 03:59:13 PM
That's clearly an implication she wants you to bone her. Either do that or report her for sexual harassment.

I'm assuming after she said "I'm changing your job" she gestured toward her crotch in some way.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 20, 2012, 04:02:27 PM
How can I NOT be having fun in such an environment?

To be honest, I'm wondering the same thing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 20, 2012, 04:42:06 PM
By changing my job I mean instead of doing two people's jobs, it'd be adding a third for no additional pay, minus the tips I should be getting if I wasn't slowed down considerably by all this extra work.

And by "saying I'll be fired" she means she'll fire me.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 20, 2012, 04:46:25 PM
Either do that or report her for sexual harrassment.

If I were to try and get her fired for anything, it'd be for her being so racist she keeps skin color in mind when deciding whose food to make first.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 20, 2012, 04:47:47 PM
Right, so if you're doomed anyway and the job is a crappy restaurant service job, why haven't you started Operation Great Balls of Fire yet?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on July 20, 2012, 10:01:31 PM
We're hiring basically anybody with a Computer Science background who has OOP/scripting experience.  If interested please send an updated resume (I refuse to dig out anybody's resume from x months ago, sorry).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 21, 2012, 06:26:39 AM
One of my coworkers discovered that "No. 'Katja Deutsch' is not pronounced 'Catch a Douche'".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on July 21, 2012, 09:27:09 PM
We're hiring basically anybody with a Computer Science background who has OOP/scripting experience.  If interested please send an updated resume (I refuse to dig out anybody's resume from x months ago, sorry).

Been awhile since I coded OOP but I've got Java background.  Most of my recent scripting's been PHP.

I can update my resume but most of what I've done over the past 7 years or so has been IT.  Still, I'll see about polishing it up, at least, so that it's clear I HAVE had a job for the past two years.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on July 23, 2012, 03:48:04 AM
I almost reminded a customer today that Robocop was part man, part machine, but ALL cop.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Smiler on July 23, 2012, 06:25:52 AM
WHY WOULD YOU NOT?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: falselogic on July 23, 2012, 01:12:04 PM
The movie was cancelled. Or it will be in a month... Anyone read any good scripts/treatments recently?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on July 25, 2012, 10:20:25 AM
Once again I have let the appropriate parties know that we were about a month away from running out of X and needed to order more.

Once again they have waited until we actually ran out to order more.

At least nobody's pissing on the floor.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on July 25, 2012, 11:39:31 AM
I'm dealing with a similar situation right now, except instead of ordering things, we're migrating databases to a new server, and I've been charged with collecting all of the information we need from the various database owners. I've been hounding them for over a month now, and it's only in the past week that they've started responding. It's interesting how much more responsive people become when you send a mass email to them and all of their supervisors with the words "PROJECT AT RISK" in 48pt bold letters.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on July 25, 2012, 08:08:04 PM
The evidence that my boss doesn't like me continues to build. Have I been doing something wrong all this time? I'm glad I'm leaving.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on July 26, 2012, 08:38:16 AM
I've been trying to get a phone number from my boss for the last hour. Refusing to just tell me, he keeps trying to text it.

Somehow the first message that actually makes it to me is a video file named after the contact. No number though.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 26, 2012, 01:02:07 PM
"I need you to make a French call" is inexorably becoming "Let me dump my shitty fucking intractable issue on you".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on July 26, 2012, 01:31:22 PM
I read that twice and I'm still not sure whether or not a "French call" means prostitution.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 26, 2012, 01:43:24 PM
No it means to call some sack of shit who's going to spend half an hour trying to bullshit me horribly.

"No I can't send you proof of my address in 2006, because I never paid bills, lost my wallet on 2001 and never replaced the ID, moved constantly, never paid taxes, and never had a bank account... even though I already said I worked and also used government assisstance. [Plus a half-hour of cursing.]"

That was literally the last guy's defence.

Like fine buddy, lie your shitty shitty lies. Waste my time. Swear yourself blue. But I sure wouldn't expect me to actually, you know, do anything.
 
Okay sure, we all get these deadbeat retards often enough here. They call in trying to pretend they didn't run up that $2000 account after paying for it for five years out of their own bank account or whatever the hell. They're the shit you wade through while trying to get real work done and help legitimate victims of real fraud. After they bitch and moan for however long they always get the same line in the end: We need some actual shred of proof before we're gonna do anything.

But I'm getting tired of "Oh this guy only speaks French" turning into "Here you do this" fast, because I'm starting to get an instinctive fear reaction to those requests. I can't tell people to fuck off either, because taking those is actually in my job description.

I mean, they're easy calls, because like good little petty bureaucrats we have all the power and as long as you remember that there's no reason to flip your shit. But that doesn't mean I enjoy humouring these worthless assholes for a half-hour or an hour at a time.

EDIT: So many spelling mistakes. X___x
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 26, 2012, 02:00:45 PM
Also, that other job at 55k doesn't look like it's going anywhere. I was doing really really good until they figured out that I have no real "CAREER GOAL" anymore besides "Don't starve... maybe save enough money to pay for some kinda retraining to escape office work" and didn't feel like lying about that.

I'm not really broken up about that, because it seems like it would have been non-stop bitchwork and I would've had to move to ass-nowhere. But that sure would have been a step up for money.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on July 28, 2012, 08:02:05 AM
Had something stolen off my desk, asked the people I work with if they'd seen it, sat back down, got a message from my boss that I needed to stop throwing a fit about it.

asking anyone if they'd borrowed something off my desk is fucking throwing a fit about it? What kind of infants do I fucking work with?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on July 28, 2012, 07:28:03 PM
Your boss stole it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on July 28, 2012, 08:04:07 PM
Not likely. My boss actually likes me. Apparently people were complaining that I was throwing a fit.

I wasn't throwing a fucking fit! The literal extent of my 'fit' was asking all the people who were there if they'd borrowed it or knew anyone who did.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 28, 2012, 08:19:48 PM
Odds the person who stole it reported you are...
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 29, 2012, 01:48:13 AM
My boss hates me, I've been threatened to be fired at least thrice a day since she's started, my computer won't read my harddrive anymore, and I'm being investigated for credit card fraud.

It's been a stellar day and a half.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 29, 2012, 07:06:55 AM
Mods, Shinra's throwing a fit. Would one of you tell him to cut it out?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 29, 2012, 07:09:42 AM
Wait... credit card fraud? WTF?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on July 29, 2012, 07:15:48 AM
Shinra       fit

FIRST TIME I'VE SEEN THOSE TWO WORDS IN A SENTENCE TOGETHER HEH :smug:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on July 29, 2012, 07:41:49 AM
I wasn't throwing a fucking fit! The literal extent of my 'fit' was asking all the people who were there if they'd borrowed it or knew anyone who did.

(http://www.virtualstapler.com/office_space/images/milton_looks.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on July 29, 2012, 09:53:19 AM
I wasn't throwing a fucking fit! The literal extent of my 'fit' was asking all the people who were there if they'd borrowed it or knew anyone who did.

(http://www.virtualstapler.com/office_space/images/milton_looks.jpg)

This was basically it with less nice stapler and more chewed up usb cable my cats ate
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on July 30, 2012, 02:57:27 AM
it's monday!  :whoops:

Them: "Hi, I'm locked out of my account"

(verify the caller, unlock the account)

Them: "Is there anything that could have caused this?"
Me: "Well, did you change your password recently?"
Them: "No."
Me: "Have you been locked out recently?"
Them: "No.'
Me: "Well, is it possible you had capslock on, or typo'd the password?"
Them: "No, that's impossible."

:bam:



edit: another one

Them: "When I launch my token, I get a Critical Error"
Me: "Alright, have you tried restarting your computer?"
Them, incredulous and offended - a tone that says 'you are condescending to me': "...No"

 :rage:

:| lady, i am not trying to waste your time, reboots literally fix 30% of my callers' issues every day

it fixed the fucking problem by the god damn way, and they were rude all the way to the end of the fucking call
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 30, 2012, 12:22:51 PM
"Yeah, even I've heard they want  to fire you but can't. Which is bullshit. You do your job great. They just don't like you."
Every coworker. Literally every person I work with says this.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on July 30, 2012, 12:27:24 PM
In any other story, this is what happens when you do sleep with your boss.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on July 30, 2012, 12:40:55 PM
I just want to know how anyone could dislike Lottel SO INTENSELY.

I mean, if it was a guy complaining about the competition, sure, I could see that.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on July 30, 2012, 12:59:19 PM
Maybe she doesn't like gut-wrenching puns.

Lottel: Collect documentation and evidence. A "forced quit" is where they can't fire you but make your job so miserable you quit. It's illegal, and you can at least pull unemployment after a forced quit if you don't actually press charges.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on July 30, 2012, 02:13:23 PM
I've been taking pictures of the unreasonable lists of my duties as well as before and after pictures of the areas I clean.

The problem is they don't have a good reason to fire me. And I won't give them one.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 01, 2012, 09:31:17 AM
"So this log says it started at 18:16:16 on Tue Jul 31.  Sounds like the one you're looking for, right?"
"No, I started it around 6:16 last night."

:fail:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on August 01, 2012, 10:06:33 AM
To be fair, not everybody operates on a 24 hour clock.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on August 01, 2012, 10:14:43 AM
Yesbut the conversion consists of adding 12 to a number.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on August 01, 2012, 10:20:52 AM
That's askin' too much.

(I still operate on the 24 hour clock, 4 years after getting out.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 01, 2012, 10:29:45 AM
That's askin' too much.

(I still operate on the 24 hour clock, 4 years after getting out.

EUROPEAN SPOTTED.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on August 01, 2012, 10:38:16 AM
I use a 24 hour clock because... I don't actually know why I do. I was never forced to. Probably has something to do with a digital watch not being set for 12 hour clock at some point in my childhood :D
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on August 01, 2012, 10:40:23 AM
Yesbut the conversion consists of adding 12 to a number.
Arithmetic is obsolete. Computers exist.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Caithness on August 01, 2012, 10:43:26 AM
When I was 20 I just decided that a 24-hour clock made more sense and I've been using one ever since.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on August 01, 2012, 10:54:06 AM
EUROPEAN SPOTTED.

Careful. McDohl's from Texas. Calling him a European is like telling a Japanese guy "Go back to China!"
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on August 01, 2012, 10:55:24 AM
Careful. McDohl's from Texas. Calling him a European is like telling a Japanese guy "Go back to China!"
I bet that shit kills in Nanking (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nanking_Massacre) Buge.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on August 01, 2012, 10:55:34 AM
You might not guess Guatemalans use the 24 hour clock and European dating; until you've spent enough time reading time cards from them and start to do it yourself.

Calling him a European is like telling a Japanese guy "Go back to China!"
So totally acceptable?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 01, 2012, 11:10:03 AM
I'm pretty sure I know what state McDohl actually lives in guys...























... Denial!

DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 01, 2012, 11:27:38 AM
I guess I should point out that the person here is A) a Linux engineer B) working in aviation C) with a Master's degree.

I did not think that expecting such a person to understand timestamps was too much, but when I brought it up with another engineer with a similar background he was similarly lost, so.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on August 01, 2012, 12:26:42 PM
Huh.  Also, IM.  :fuckyou:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on August 01, 2012, 12:28:33 PM
Also, i'm driving north and dooking jerbs from New Mexicans every day.  Gotta pay state income tax for NM.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on August 01, 2012, 12:42:37 PM
I guess I should point out that the person here is A) a Linux engineer B) working in aviation C) with a Master's degree.

I did not think that expecting such a person to understand timestamps was too much, but when I brought it up with another engineer with a similar background he was similarly lost, so.
One of my electrical engineering professors liked to give his students basic mechanical engineering quizes. They asked advanced problems such as "gear A turns clockwise, which direction does gear B turn?" Evidently the three passing grades in our class's first quiz was his record high.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on August 01, 2012, 01:06:04 PM
It's a trick question, because (metal)gear A and gear B don't interact guys.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 01, 2012, 03:37:35 PM
Brentai uses only left-handed clocks.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on August 01, 2012, 08:29:41 PM
Related to the thread icon, I pressure washed and shoveled the rat feces out of a disused building.  #howwasyourday
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on August 01, 2012, 08:51:25 PM
Well, aside from my semiannual making-sure-I'm-not-fired (http://www.corporate-sellout.com/index.php/2012/08/01/what-sticks-with-you/), not too shabby.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on August 02, 2012, 06:26:35 AM
Of course I saw it as

Brentai uses only left-handed cocks.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on August 02, 2012, 06:43:53 AM
In my annual review I was told that I need to work on smiling more, that not everyone in the office thinks I'm as friendly as I should be

but our audit clients all consistently give me the highest markings for being pleasant to work with, so maybe my managers should step off my nuts
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on August 09, 2012, 10:08:45 AM
I've been having a passive-aggressive tiff with the guy in charge of one of the bigger job sites. He never gets me site reports on time and there are always stupid problems with it. I never directly tell him to stop being a fucking dick and do his job right, and he acts like I just told Jesus he might be taking himself a bit too seriously right after finishing dragging the cross every time I ask why it's late.

So yesterday I started a new system for tracking employee location. First thing when I come in today there's an email from him to basically everyone in an office position in the company asking me why three days had employees missing even though they were on his sheets.

This allowed me to reply all reminding him that his son wasn't included because even though the kid has worked with us for about a month he's yet to hand in a single time sheet of his own like is expected of everyone else, and the other employee wasn't on there because it wasn't a real employee. The employee that had been on his job site for a week whose name he didn't know was up there though. That guy had turned in time sheets.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 10, 2012, 12:41:59 PM
They uh.... they raised the entire department's pay grade!

O________________________________________________________________o
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on August 13, 2012, 06:38:44 AM
I just spent eight fucking minutes trying to explain to somebody why a local printer made in the last 20 years doesn't have to be manually configured by individual USB port. Apparently, somebody in local It told him we couldn't install print drivers over the network because it'd apply only to intranet printers and not to his local machine, and convinced him he needed to manually configure the port.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 17, 2012, 02:28:09 PM
The final tally came in for the grade increase. I gets me a 12.5% raaiiiiiiisseee bayyyybeeeeeeeeeee!~

 :dance:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on August 17, 2012, 03:25:50 PM
DAYUM GIRL! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8YBK2jaDmLo#)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on August 23, 2012, 07:37:54 AM
So my office, faced with an overwhelming amount of concurrently running projects, decided to implement a project tiering system. There are Tier 1, Tier 2, and Tier 3 projects, listed in order of visibility / importance. There are currently 7 Tier 1 projects. Official direction from the higher-ups is that if you're working on any Tier 1 project, you should not be working on anything else.

I'm sure you can see where this is going.

GUESS WHO'S WORKING ON ALL 7 TIER 1 PROJECTS

:whoops:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on August 23, 2012, 07:57:05 AM
Your... mom?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 23, 2012, 03:04:17 PM
Hey hey! Job security!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 23, 2012, 03:27:19 PM
There's a thing as having way too much job security.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 23, 2012, 07:12:41 PM
Trade some of it in by asking for a raise!*

>__>

*This offer not available to slaves, the incarcerated or anyone else chained to their desk literally rather than merely spiritually.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: James Edward Smith on August 28, 2012, 08:07:37 AM
Do you know what the best kind of crash and exception you can have in your Xcode objective C project is? It's the kind where Xcode decides to completely invent one where there isn't one and then point you to a line that makes no sense for the exception to be thrown there. Then after 20 minutes of thinking you are crazy you just close Xcode and reopen the project and WOAH the crash is MAGICALLY GONE from your app. Amazing!

THANKS Xcode 4, you pile of fucking bullshit.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 28, 2012, 11:01:11 AM
The fingerprint scanner on the timeclock at work demands the right index finger. I need to find the exception for people who shaved the skin off a chunk of their right index fingertip with a potato peeler.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Doom on August 28, 2012, 11:03:52 AM
Why didn't you just save the potato, stupid?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on August 28, 2012, 11:04:08 AM
The real question is why you are working instead of using your powers for a successful life of crime.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on August 28, 2012, 11:24:08 AM
The greatest power switch prankster in the land - Rights Fingers. A mysterious accident stripped him of his fingerpint and his VERY IDENTITY... on his right hand index finger. Now he travels the land, turning off light switches, power switches, junction switches, arcade cabinet switches. The police are powerless to stop him and his single finger press related crimes - untracable, they are truly the perfect caper.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on August 28, 2012, 12:53:11 PM
ironically the pursuit of the perfect caper is exactly how he ended up in this situation

CAPERS ARE LIKE A KIND OF POTATO RIGHT
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 28, 2012, 12:56:42 PM
Capers are little salty pickled flower buds. Almost the same thing, though.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on August 28, 2012, 01:12:53 PM
salty pickled flower bud was the worst movie in that series
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on August 28, 2012, 01:36:04 PM
+1 Niku
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on August 29, 2012, 10:45:28 AM
Today someone ripped the plumbing out of the bathroom and I guess will be back to replace it at some point.

No one felt the need to tell the two people in the office this was happening.

Whoever found out the water was off did the hard way and then broke the door that was already off the hinges.

We can't order any porta-johns because we owe all the local companies.



So I now work in an office that has nowhere for me to pee or wash my hands, but a very lovely new exposed pile of human filth.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on August 29, 2012, 10:58:19 AM
I was almost attacked by a crazy man today
He was walking down the street arguing with god. And god kept interrupting him. And this guy was getting angrier and angrier to the point he threatened to start murdering people. It was then he saw me and started screaming at the sky "I'LL DO IT! I'LL FUCKING DO IT!
I then hid behind a car and the guy walked up to where I was, started punching the air, screaming "I'M BETTER THAN THEM! I'M BEEEETTTEEEEER!"
As he was screaming, I ran off.

I really love working near two mental institutions and the jail.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on August 29, 2012, 11:04:20 AM
I didn't think Illinois actually had two mental institutions. Are you sure one of them didn't close a while back and just release all of its wards into the general population?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on August 29, 2012, 11:35:52 AM
I was also yelled at by a crazy person today! Mine was while I was at the mall during lunch, though. She yelled, "YOU'RE NOT MARRIED!" at me from across the walkway.

HOW DID SHE KNOW

 :scanners:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on August 29, 2012, 12:14:41 PM
I wasn't attacked by a crazy person but I did see an old man in a motorized wheelchair with speakers tied to it blasting Greek folk music.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on August 29, 2012, 12:43:58 PM
I saw a bunch of people who forgot about the WEIRD HAPPENINGS (http://brontoforum.us/index.php?topic=2313.380) thread today.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on August 29, 2012, 01:01:40 PM
Let's put the crown on this day:

Drivers who also were never told about the bathroom start coming back, trying to use the power washer.

Now I can pee and wash my hands IN the pile of human filth that will slowly be seeping through the doorway into the carpet any minute now.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 29, 2012, 01:13:59 PM
All I can think of is Rush Limbaugh with his face pressed up against the glass.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on August 30, 2012, 05:16:37 AM
Welp, guess I'm not getting paid today! Hope I get paid tomorrow, but who knows, what with it being a holiday weekend and all.

I really need a new contracting agency.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 30, 2012, 02:02:09 PM
Uh oh, my coworkers just discovered Nyan Cat.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 31, 2012, 10:59:33 AM
Who he fuck calls a two-hour meeting at the very end of the day on a Friday before a three-day weekend?

Oh right, the guy I trained.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on August 31, 2012, 11:13:25 AM
Obviously he's no trying to strike you down and become the master. You'll need to find a nice ledge somewhere before that can happen.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on September 05, 2012, 06:41:39 AM
Quote
My e-mail address will not send, please see if there is something that can be done with the domain isp.
It's gonna' be a good day.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Niku on September 05, 2012, 08:15:04 AM
Hours got cut pretty much store wide at almost the same time I got put back onto morning shifts.

Which means I'm getting home around 9AM most days.  This is such a double-edged sword.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 08, 2012, 08:14:53 AM
Today's episode of "The guys at work discover an internet meme from several years ago" features:

HEYYEYAAEYAAAEYAEYAA (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZ5LpwO-An4#)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on September 09, 2012, 04:47:23 AM
I work with a guy who smells so strongly of cat pee that when he approaches me I instantly get a headache. The smell lingers in the air, thick and acrid and inescapable. It is really, profoundly awful.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on September 09, 2012, 05:46:05 AM
Have a bottle of Febreeze on hand. When you smell him coming, make like you're freshening up your work area, then spritz him a couple of times "by accident."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Silversong on September 09, 2012, 05:48:08 AM
Shinra, I'd actually say if it's that bad and headaches are induced, say something to HR. It's their job to have unpleasant conversations with people.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on September 09, 2012, 05:51:49 AM
Shinra, I'd actually say if it's that bad and headaches are induced, say something to HR. It's their job to have unpleasant conversations with people.

The guy is on another helpdesk so I deal with him pretty infrequently (probably once every six weeks) and he's been around for a while. (like, ten years) I've noticed that nobody sits by him, so I suspect they're aware of the problem but can't get rid of him because of seniority, or just consider the stinkiness part of the price of having an experienced employee.

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 09, 2012, 06:40:50 AM
Soooo... he smells like ammonia?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on September 09, 2012, 06:44:30 AM
Soooo... he smells like ammonia?

Yeah, but a uriney kind of ammonia. It's distinct cat pee.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on September 09, 2012, 07:51:53 AM
Today's episode of "The guys at work discover an internet meme from several years ago" features:

HEYYEYAAEYAAAEYAEYAA (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZ5LpwO-An4#)

Hey, of all the ones that they could have picked, this is probably one of the better results.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 09, 2012, 08:30:07 AM
This is true!

The previous episode was the 10-hour loop pf the pikachu song.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 09, 2012, 02:58:46 PM
Oh god, they found nyancat.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on September 09, 2012, 03:22:00 PM
Uh oh, my coworkers just discovered Nyan Cat.
Oh god, they found nyancat.

Mongrel

exactly how old are you
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 09, 2012, 03:28:53 PM
Who're you again?  :nyoro~n:

The weekend shift changes around a lot, except for me and two or three other guys who always do it. One of the guys from last time is showing A WHOLE NEW CROWD.

I actually feel really out of it today, like I'm drunk or something. Only I haven't had a drink at all [joke about me actually having drunk a keg but forgotten it already].
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on September 10, 2012, 10:34:14 AM
I went from first on my boss's 'to fire' to her repeatedly telling new hires I'm the perfect employee and they need to follow my lead.

I have not changed my work habits or attitude one bit.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on September 10, 2012, 10:35:27 AM
She's trying to lure you into a false sense of security so you fuck up your perfect documentation. Don't trust her.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on September 10, 2012, 10:36:06 AM
It turns out getting hired into a new job is very stressful and you don't know who your best workers are until you've been there a while. Give the woman some slack, dude.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on September 10, 2012, 10:37:19 AM
Godaddy.com down for an hour?

Be sure to tell all your clients you can't email them because of the "internet revolution" messing things up.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on September 10, 2012, 10:42:12 AM
The A/C on my floor is broken. Right now, it's about 88 degrees with practically zero airflow. Fortunately, I already decided to take the afternoon off to go to the DMV. I'm not sure if that will be much better, though.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on September 10, 2012, 10:44:33 AM
It turns out getting hired into a new job is very stressful and you don't know who your best workers are until you've been there a while. Give the woman some slack, dude.

I have, buddy boy ol' pal.
I was saying it's weird that I was being told multiple times a day from management they want to fire me and now I am a golden employee.

I understand it's stressful (I have managerial experience too), but that doesn't mean a complete 180 isn't odd, Joxaroo.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on September 10, 2012, 10:47:08 AM
It's probably worth mentioning that I've been nursing a pretty severe paranoid fit these past two days. Still!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on September 10, 2012, 11:42:27 AM
I was saying it's weird that I was being told multiple times a day from management they want to fire me and now I am a golden employee.

I understand it's stressful (I have managerial experience too), but that doesn't mean a complete 180 isn't odd, Joxaroo.

How long have you been working there? Maybe you're over your probationary period and they can't fire you without a ton of paperwork.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Malikial on September 10, 2012, 12:47:19 PM
I have to agree with my brother, there are employees I've hated due to certain things but slowly grown to appreciate for various other reason. Like, I had one employee at my previous management job who was absolutely atrocious at customer interaction and various other things. I disliked him at first for always being in the backroom. I slowly grew to like him and be on his side in every argument versus other employees for the simple fact that without him the back room wouldn't have been able to run because he literally did all the inventory/stock management every day by himself. I found out the reason he was getting complaints from all the other employees was not because he was 'horrible and always in the backroom' but that he was always in the backroom because everyone else literally refused to move or arrange stock because it was 'beneath them' and 'Todd Work'. The employee was named Todd and he was quite happy to just quietly do work in the back, I finally had to just tell everyone else they couldn't fucking have it both ways, he was in the back doing stock all day or they did some fucking stock management. They shut up and let him be after a while. Like James said, sometimes your best workers are not the ones first readily apparent who make the most noise and seem the most 'eager' day one. In fact, in my 6+ years of management experience I've found those are usually the fucking worst. Our last batch of hires had a girl who, due to my seniority and ability at my current job and the fact that I get along with or am related to(James) the managers instantly tried to befriend and engage me over video games and various other things and tried to constantly tell people she wanted to do good and whatnot. Basically she was the most vocal/engaging employee. She ended up almost getting fired within 6 weeks, for not showing up or being late over half a dozen times and constantly being incorrect on her till, finally 'quitting in rage due to our 'LACK OF INTELLIGENCE'(What she screamed while walking out the door) after she got written up for no-call no-showing 2 days in a row and then arguing with the manager and using rude language about what she thought constituted being 'sick and unable to call'. After she left all our employee theft problems stopped, all our back room issues stopped...

What I mean is, maybe your boss finally got over everyone who was being vocal/'helpful' and started to see the real side of things. I'm jaded enough by management that I ignored the one girl being 'nice' to me and just looked at the merits of her work and, when asked within the 3 weeks of her starting recommended her for being fired and the 'quiet yet capable' people for being kept on because I realized the 'friendly' girl was really just trying to use fake attitude to cover up horrible work ethic. You gotta be capable and efficient, if you can manage that you'll rarely get fired.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on September 10, 2012, 01:32:16 PM
Ok. I just said it but I'll go into more detail.

I'm a good employee. I've always been. I have managerial experience so I know how to be a good employee from their point of view too. I understand how being a manager goes and how sometimes you're looking at this part of the picture instead of different parts.

But just because she finally got over whatever it was she needed to get over to "like" having an employee that actually did their job, that doesn't mean a 180 degree change (a complete reversal from previous actions) isn't really weird to witness.


As for Buge: Probation lasts for one pay period at this job. And the extra paperwork isn't a problem because she hired another assistant to do the paperwork so she's firing people left and right.
I'm one of the only three people left since before she started working.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 13, 2012, 03:29:21 PM
Got a work ticket today. The ticket simply read "See acct note #####".

That note simply reads "Please see ticket."

 :8V:  SINGULARITY ACHIEVED.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on September 13, 2012, 08:15:21 PM
Land: see "snatch".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 13, 2012, 08:47:15 PM
It really was one of those "No way, come on. This doesn't really happen outside of a comedy movie." moments.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 13, 2012, 09:12:38 PM
Mongrel, did you put the new cover on your TPS report?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 13, 2012, 09:20:17 PM
That reminds me of how I was sent to the corner in another job (when I was the warranties manager at Virgin Mobile). I think I made stapler jokes for a month.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Defenestration on September 17, 2012, 04:00:55 AM
I have started working on a Playstation tech support line. There are a lot of things behind the scenes that are nice reminders that I am working for Sony, and it's just as dysfunctional inside as it looks from the out.

Oh, and I got a call from a Duke Nukem soundboard yesterday.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on September 17, 2012, 11:03:09 AM
Team lead came by to let me know that the project's pretty close to wrapping and give me the now-familiar "We don't know what that means for you; we want you to stay on, we've put in a good word for you up the chain, and the boss is talking to upper management."

Hoping I at least get through the end of October.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 19, 2012, 10:02:29 AM
Hiring again for personal lackey position as website tester / automation developer (all my previous lackeys have been promoted, not quit).  Usual caveat of "you actually have to want to live in Orange County" applies.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on September 19, 2012, 06:41:40 PM
What do I need to know how much do I get paid?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on September 20, 2012, 06:26:09 AM
I just found out that the only other person in my office with the same position as me is being let go, due to budget reasons / inability to keep up with our workload.

At the same time, one of the new project managers we just brought on said that, because other managers have been singing my praises, he's going to ask approach our director with a proposal to bring me onto his projects in a role that will mean a lot more responsibility and a higher workload for me.

Would this be a good time to ask for a raise?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 20, 2012, 07:04:17 AM
Tough question... really depends on your work climate.

If your stock isn't that great, wait until they bring you on board the other projects. Maybe even after you've been at it for a bit. If you're the golden boy, you might be able to ask once the request is made and pending but before you actually move. I generally wouldn't ask before you actually have confirmation of the extra responsibility, because you want your position to have stabilized (so you can point to things and say "See? I do this and this and this now").

You also have to think of the possibility and consequences of their saying no.

Don't get me wrong, I think that if your responsibilities are being expanded so much you should absolutely ask. But if you're on shakey ground, or the company generally doesn't issue raises outside regular processes, the safest bet may be to push it back to your next annual review.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 20, 2012, 10:22:20 AM
Asking outright is a faux pas in modern America, but strongly indicating that you're dissatisfied with your current responsibility-to-compensation should provoke a response of some sort.  If it doesn't, they're probably trying to push you out of the company.  If you've sufficiently rattled your cage to the point where you feel comfortable, and nobody's come to feed you, then start looking for an escape route.

...I mixed my metaphor there a little.  I'm saying (discreetly) look for another job, but make sure it actually gives you the advancement you want.  Promotion via quitting is pretty common these days.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 22, 2012, 12:13:45 PM
Well, that's six hours out of a ten-hour shift that's been spent doing absolutely nothing so far. IT: "Oh your profile is so broken that the tier two guys have to fix it... and they're not in until Monday."

Sadly, my manager isn't in favour of my coming in tomorrow as scheduled just to sit on my ass and stare into space until I go walleyed. Which means I can play hookey tomorrow! Yay! But then I have to come in on Monday (my day off instead). Boo!

Well, okay, that's basically a wash as far as I'm concerned and I didn't have to do anything today and might just get to leave early, which is a bonus.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 22, 2012, 02:43:24 PM
"Hey can I just fuck off early? I am literally doing nothing right now."

"Email your manager and make arrangements to make up the three hours later."

"Never mind then! Guess I'll stay right through to 8 pm!"

(they'll dock this day from my numbers so it won't count for my monthly numbers. If I come in later, that'll just add three hours of work. If you want me to fuck the dog here instead of at home, then okay, whatever!).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on September 22, 2012, 03:00:46 PM
...not literally I hope.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 22, 2012, 03:19:20 PM
I suppose that expression is not common out your way?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 22, 2012, 03:52:32 PM
Nnnnnnnnope.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on September 22, 2012, 04:21:26 PM
http://onlineslangdictionary.com/meaning-definition-of/fuck-the-dog (http://onlineslangdictionary.com/meaning-definition-of/fuck-the-dog)

Quote
notes
  • Predominantly Canadian expression. Variants include "screw the pooch", "ducked the fog". Used by French Canadians as "fourrer le chien."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 22, 2012, 04:24:45 PM
"Screw the pooch" is used here to mean something entirely different (http://onlineslangdictionary.com/meaning-definition-of/screw-the-pooch); it means, rather than nothing, to do something that's a colossal mistake (e.g. "Mitt Romney royally screwed the pooch with his entire campaign.")
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on September 22, 2012, 04:55:45 PM
Boy, Mongrel really fucked the dog on that one.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 22, 2012, 05:28:31 PM
I've commented before to people how weird it is that that expression means "to be a lazy fuck and do nothing", but I never realized it was exclusively Canadian.

Also, screwed the pooch I'm familiar with and with that usage too... which makes the difference between the two expressions even funnier.

Anyway yeah, I literally did nothing for 10 hours except surf the internet, eat lunch, and then surf the internet again. 'Course that's not really any different than a regular day.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 22, 2012, 06:00:10 PM
Man, I remember when my job was basically that, interspersed with playing video games on company time.

Sometimes I wonder what sort of job I'll have to be in to ever get that kind of pay/benefits package again, too.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 22, 2012, 06:09:06 PM
Well, it sounds great and pays the bills, but honestly it's mind-crushingly boring. It'll probably kill me as well, just reeeeeeeeeally slowly instead of rapidly. Fortunately, I'm not in any particular hurry...
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on September 22, 2012, 06:31:23 PM
Get a portable game system. Pick up some extra-long extra-japanese RPGs.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on September 22, 2012, 07:22:10 PM
Quote
notes
  • Predominantly Canadian expression. Variants include "screw the pooch", "ducked the fog". Used by French Canadians as "fourrer le chien."

I have never heard anyone say "fourrer le chien", ever.

I have often heard people say "enculer les mouches", however. Which refers to having anal sex with a fly.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 22, 2012, 07:38:55 PM
But does that mean the same thing?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on September 22, 2012, 07:45:18 PM
Pretty much yeah. Maybe with an extra connotation of "nobody involved is having a good time".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 22, 2012, 08:48:03 PM
"Bugger a fly" is something they say in the Franco-facing parts of England too, I think.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 25, 2012, 09:28:59 AM
What's harder than explaining simple technical concepts to people with no background to understand them?  Explaining simple technical concepts to people whose background really ought to include this stuff, but who remain completely ignorant of even the basic principles of it somehow.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on September 25, 2012, 12:42:36 PM
What's harder than explaining simple technical concepts to people with no background to understand them?  Explaining simple technical concepts to people whose background really ought to include this stuff, but who remain completely ignorant of even the basic principles of it somehow.

It's even better when those people have the ability to completely roadblock the work you're doing based entirely on their ignorance of said concepts.

Also

Tough question... really depends on your work climate.

If your stock isn't that great, wait until they bring you on board the other projects. Maybe even after you've been at it for a bit. If you're the golden boy, you might be able to ask once the request is made and pending but before you actually move. I generally wouldn't ask before you actually have confirmation of the extra responsibility, because you want your position to have stabilized (so you can point to things and say "See? I do this and this and this now").

You also have to think of the possibility and consequences of their saying no.

Don't get me wrong, I think that if your responsibilities are being expanded so much you should absolutely ask. But if you're on shakey ground, or the company generally doesn't issue raises outside regular processes, the safest bet may be to push it back to your next annual review.

Asking outright is a faux pas in modern America, but strongly indicating that you're dissatisfied with your current responsibility-to-compensation should provoke a response of some sort.  If it doesn't, they're probably trying to push you out of the company.  If you've sufficiently rattled your cage to the point where you feel comfortable, and nobody's come to feed you, then start looking for an escape route.

...I mixed my metaphor there a little.  I'm saying (discreetly) look for another job, but make sure it actually gives you the advancement you want.  Promotion via quitting is pretty common these days.

I was literally told yesterday by my manager that I am almost indespensible at this point, and that they are leaning on my skills/abilities more and more all the time. So I guess I should start rattling.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 28, 2012, 04:16:53 PM
About six months ago, they laid off a guy in our department who was technically a great worker, but who actually never did any work.

He had some sort of high-paying cop-support job lined up (he'd had a job like that before and was going back), so he didn't give two shits and basically spent the last three or four months here figuring out what he could get away with not doing, coming in 5 hours late (not an exaggeration), etc. Eventually they got sick of his antics and canned him.

We're short a couple guys, so now we're hiring. Today we got a message that same guy is being rehired. I mean, I don't hold it against the guy, he was a ton of fun and always helped anybody else out. But he was the LAST person I ever figured would be rehired.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on September 28, 2012, 07:17:45 PM
Can you get me a job there? :D
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 28, 2012, 09:30:58 PM
Er...

:/
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 28, 2012, 11:55:50 PM
:popcorn:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on September 28, 2012, 11:59:49 PM
Orange. County.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on October 01, 2012, 09:46:12 AM
Welp, guess it's official: I'm out of here in 3 weeks.

Wish they'd decided on a day other than my thirtieth birthday to tell me this, but so it goes.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on October 01, 2012, 10:17:11 AM
They just don't want you cashing in your pension early, grandpa.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 01, 2012, 11:37:07 AM
It turns out after comparing notes within the department and also with some cops, that the guy we're rehiring may be a compulsive liar and/or natural con and god knows what besides (he had a different story for every employee he was on good terms with and his stories of civilian cop employment are bunk)!

This is probably bad in a fraud investigation department!

Of course, nobody's going to come right out and say that to management, soooooo...  :popcorn:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Silversong on October 01, 2012, 05:44:51 PM
Anonymous letter time?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 01, 2012, 05:49:35 PM
No... best to let this thing play itself out, I think.

Anonymous letters are not really a great idea in a relatively small department full of people trained to interrogate people and investigate things in detail.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on October 01, 2012, 06:32:03 PM
Apparently not well-trained.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on October 01, 2012, 06:41:25 PM
zing
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on October 01, 2012, 09:13:01 PM
Well, the good news is the temp agency says they have a few more potential jobs already lined up, one of which is actually direct-hire and not a temp gig at all.

Now THAT would be a real-ass birthday present.

Not going to count on it or anything, but...it sure would be nice.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 01, 2012, 09:50:29 PM
Apparently not well-trained.

We all know for sure that the managers knew he was a fuckoff. He was thrown on all kind of probation before he was let go and his manager had to monitor literally everything he did (which made this rehire incredibly mindboggling even without the liar/con possibility).

Considering our senior manager is a fucking Bene Gesserit Truthsayser and ought to know better, I really got no idea what they're thinking. I doubt it's blackmail, and he's not related to anyone in the company, so fucked if I know!

At the very least this should get INTERESTING.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on October 02, 2012, 02:54:11 PM
Welp, got an interview on Thursday.

I'll say one thing for my temp agency: they haven't gotten me a dream job, but they HAVE kept me pretty consistently working since the end of '08, those first few months of '11 notwithstanding.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on October 03, 2012, 09:11:01 AM
"Is Witness dependent on SAP?"

"No. Witness is dependent on Genesys."

"But Genesys is dependent on SAP."

"Yes."

DR meetings are fun. :hurr:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on October 04, 2012, 06:51:18 AM
Welp, off to interview.  Wish I didn't have a giant honking cold sore, and I didn't even think about how loose my nice interview slacks would be now, but fuck it, I am confident and I KNOW I can handle being the entire IT department for a local organization.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on October 04, 2012, 07:03:52 AM
"Is Witness dependent on SAP?"

"No. Witness is dependent on Genesys."

"But Genesys is dependent on SAP."

"Yes."

DR meetings are fun. :hurr:


Every one of these programs sucks to troubleshoot.

Fuck SAP. :rage:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on October 04, 2012, 07:22:02 AM
"Is Witness dependent on SAP?"

"No. Witness is dependent on Genesys."

"But Genesys is dependent on SAP."

"Yes."

DR meetings are fun. :hurr:


Every one of these programs sucks to troubleshoot.

Fuck SAP. :rage:

Yeah, and our instance is way worse, because we've bolted a ton of proprietary crap onto it. One of the SAP consultants we brought on said it was practically unrecognizable. :whoops:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on October 08, 2012, 10:49:39 AM
Submitted a ticket to replace a bad hard drive.

Waited a couple days; it didn't show.

Checked the ticket; it was closed with the message "CANCELED CALL DUE TO NO CUSTOMER RESPONSE".  I was never contacted.

Resubmitted the ticket; same result.

On closer inspection I realized I had transposed two digits on the serial number.

Now, there are three different places where the system could have caught that.

First of all, the company has a page where you can check warranty status for your computer.  If you enter a bad serial, it will tell you it is a bad serial.  There is no good reason why this check exists in isolation on a separate page and is not performed automatically when you actually submit a ticket.

Second, the company could have actually called me and told me it was a bad serial.

And finally, they could have fucking put "invalid serial" somewhere in the cancellation notes instead of that bullshit about how I didn't respond to their total lack of contact with me.  That way I would have at least had some fucking idea why my request was cancelled instead of having to figure it out entirely on my own.

So anyway.  I submitted the ticket a third time, with the correct serial number.

Today I got a box to ship the entire laptop to them.

I don't NEED to ship the entire laptop, dammit; I just want a hard drive!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on October 09, 2012, 12:04:03 PM
I don't believe I've mentioned this, but the office where I work is directly across the street from a Sony SCE studio. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/SCE_San_Diego_Studio) You can tell it's a video game studio by the amount of black t-shirts, cargo shorts, and gross beards on display.

Today, on my way to lunch, I spied a dude hanging out, shirtless, with his dog, on their front lawn.

Not gonna lie, I am a little bit jealous. However, given what I know of the videogame industry, and especially Japanese companies within same, I'm not really all that tempted to seek employment there.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Smiler on October 09, 2012, 12:27:10 PM
You're hired. Here is your black t-shirt and neckbeard.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on October 12, 2012, 08:10:33 AM
Welp, the bad news is that I didn't get the job I interviewed for last week.

The good news is that the agency's already lining me up for another job which sounds like much the same duties and pay as that one.

I have spotted a trend here.  They are offering me better jobs for better pay, and direct-hire instead of contract-to-hire.  I am sure this is a combination of two major factors: (1) the economy has improved enough that these jobs are available and (2) I've paid my dues and the agency trusts me and is rewarding me for my excellent performance in the, shall we say, less-than-ideal jobs it's given me over the past 4 years.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on October 13, 2012, 07:44:55 PM
Guys my theatre finally gets converted to digital on the 11th of november. Over a year after they told us we were going to be converted. :D
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on October 16, 2012, 11:41:22 AM
Oh god, they found nyancat.

My coworkers have just discovered "U MAD BRO?". It's actually kind of adorable.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 18, 2012, 10:53:39 AM
From a meeting today.

"So these fraud guys are roaming in Yugoslavia"
"Okay and... wait... Yugoslavia?"
"Yeah, Yugoslavia. So the usage-"
"Uh, hold on. Yugoslavia."
"Yeah, I... ohhhh right."
"Yeah, it's been a little while since YUGOSLAVIA was a country, man."
"Ahaha, yeah, that's just what it says in AS400."
"Marshal Tito must be behind it!"
"THE CALLS ARE COMING FROM EAST GERMANY!"
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on October 18, 2012, 01:04:18 PM
From a meeting today.

"So these fraud guys are roaming in Yugoslavia"
"Okay and... wait... Yugoslavia?"
"Yeah, Yugoslavia. So the usage-"
"Uh, hold on. Yugoslavia."
"Yeah, I... ohhhh right."
"Yeah, it's been a little while since YUGOSLAVIA was a country, man."
"Ahaha, yeah, that's just what it says in AS400."
"Marshal Tito must be behind it!"
"THE CALLS ARE COMING FROM EAST GERMANY!"

I guess when you still rely on a program that was made in 1988 a lot of information isn't going to be accurate.

What I'm saying is can we please stop using as/400

fuck
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 18, 2012, 01:51:57 PM
At least it actually works properly. Unlike just about all our other IT systems
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Miss Cat Ears on October 19, 2012, 08:29:37 AM
got my own office
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on October 19, 2012, 08:52:13 AM
Replace the carpets with bubble wrap.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on October 19, 2012, 08:55:56 AM
I never knew that was something I wanted until just now.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on October 19, 2012, 09:31:22 AM
It discourages ninjas, who have a hard time being stealthy on bubble-wrap carpet.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on October 19, 2012, 09:34:19 AM
Also Vampires, who have to stop and pop every single bubble one at a time with their fingers
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Disposable Ninja on October 19, 2012, 10:07:03 AM
I got a paycheck today, yaaay!

Also, I got a job two weeks ago, yaaay! I'm a stagehand, now.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on October 19, 2012, 11:24:18 AM
I got a paycheck today, yaaay!

Also, I got a job two weeks ago, yaaay! I'm a stagehand now, yaaay!

The Muppets Show Theme Song (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9THwnQg-vEw#)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on October 19, 2012, 11:46:59 AM
It turns out one of my managers has been purposefully making me pay more at the end of the day and pocketing the difference!
And we don't know which one (as I currently have 5 managers)!
And I don't know how much I've been missing and have no way to prove it's been happening!

Weeeeeee.


(Although they DID give me the $26 they owed me from Saturday)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on October 21, 2012, 02:12:19 PM
Dear Lottel / Others:

How much of a delivery fee, if any, usually goes to the kids delivering?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on October 21, 2012, 02:20:39 PM
Depends on the business. But for the most part that extra $5 you pay is for insurance purposes for the company (not the driver) but the driver's mileage reimbursement comes from that.
Typically the DMR is ~$1.50. I think.  It's been a while since I've actually been paid for gas.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on October 22, 2012, 02:41:50 PM
Ever have a supervisor that is former military, and hasn't deprogrammed?

Because that shit sucks on toast.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on October 22, 2012, 02:54:25 PM
There are lardasses like me who don't know the exact flavor of suck slathered on that toast.
Also... If you haven't deprogrammed, are you really former military?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 22, 2012, 04:06:53 PM
Ever have a supervisor that is former military, and hasn't deprogrammed?

Because that shit sucks on toast.

Conversely, it always throws me off to try and imagine you as ever having been programmed in the first place.

 :nyoro~n:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on October 22, 2012, 05:25:19 PM
I wasn't in for 20+ years.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 28, 2012, 01:01:10 PM
I brought a pile of halloween candy and ten minute later the office lunatic (other than me, I mean) is screaming that he's trying to freebase rockets.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on October 30, 2012, 11:33:21 PM
Welp, we're into week two and my sleep schedule has started to slide.  "Up past midnight" is a bigger deal for me than it used to be; hasn't brought on any headaches but I'm worried it's going to start.

But I'm not tired and I know when I go to bed I'm just going to lie there not sleeping.

Unemployment is fucking boring, even accounting for the last few days I spent getting my computer back in working order (and the work still left to do on same -- why can't you open links in an external browser, rssowl?).  I need something to do.  I'll try and get out, at least, tomorrow, maybe bike to the comic shop.  Need to see a pulmonologist, too, to renew my albuterol prescription.  Found one nearby who my insurance covers but just got a weird mumbly voicemail when I called; maybe I'll drop by the address and see if anyone's home.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on October 31, 2012, 12:23:17 AM
Having been unemployed for going on three years, I can say the best technique I've found for staying sane is to make sure you do some kind of "work" every day. For me, that's cleaning the house, chopping wood, working out, whatever. Even if it's just a little bit, if you do something productive every day, you'll feel like less of a shit.

I've had absolutely zero luck keeping a stable schedule, but that's nothing new. I couldn't keep one even when I worked full time. My body refuses to do anything other than a 26 hour cycle.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 31, 2012, 04:55:51 AM
I couldn't keep one even when I worked full time. My body refuses to do anything other than a 26 hour cycle.

Oh god, ain't that the truth. I'm just lucky my current job is two days on, one day off, two days on, and two days off.

'Course I still fall asleep at work once in a while.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on October 31, 2012, 06:18:27 AM
Hey, thanks supervisor, I really wanted to be yelled at today for WEARING MY HOOD WHEN IT'S 55 DEGREES OUT SO MY EARS AREN'T COLD.

Seriously, this is a thing.

I am not Treyvon Fucking Martin.  Either get off my ass, or make a uniform prescribed in company policy.  And buy it for me, too, because I'm not buying it myself.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 31, 2012, 06:58:42 AM
Get the most obnoxious pair of earmuffs you can find.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on October 31, 2012, 10:49:22 AM
Having been unemployed for going on three years, I can say the best technique I've found for staying sane is to make sure you do some kind of "work" every day. For me, that's cleaning the house, chopping wood, working out, whatever. Even if it's just a little bit, if you do something productive every day, you'll feel like less of a shit.

I did a Buffy episode's worth of time on the elliptical yesterday and am about to do it again, but I really need to get out of the house.  Again, fortunately it's New Comic Day so that gives me an excuse for a bike ride downtown, and I DO want to check out that pulmonologist.

There IS plenty to do 'round here; it's been a long time since we swept or mopped.  Plus I just found out we're probably moving in December, so I've got a bunch of old crap I want to go through and get rid of.

And all this work on my computer IS the thing that most closely resembles my typical day job.  Except for the part where it gets to be 12:30 in the morning and I find myself thinking damn it, I need to get to bed.

I've had absolutely zero luck keeping a stable schedule, but that's nothing new. I couldn't keep one even when I worked full time. My body refuses to do anything other than a 26 hour cycle.

Yeah, I've got a bit of that going on too.  Slept better last night than the previous couple of nights, but still not great.  Wound up sleeping from around 1 AM to 10 AM; still no headaches, which is good.

Anyway.  Off to the elliptical machine.  And then breakfast I guess.  Not sure what I want to eat -- I've got some turkey bacon to reheat but that's not sounding terribly appetizing just now.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Malikial on October 31, 2012, 12:32:14 PM
I gotta say, I've got a job and even when work a lot I can't sleep for shit most nights. Take tonight for example, went to bed at 4:30, fell asleep around 5, woke back up at 9:45. That's just how I work, I'll sleep 3-5 hours for 2-3 days then on the 4th or so get a full 7-8 hours. Hell, the fact that I refuse to be even late for work, much less miss work or fall asleep during my shifts is one of the reasons I sleep so little sometimes. I'll not be able to fall asleep all night then 11AM or Noon will roll around, I'll finally pass out for a bit then be back up at 2PM for work... Still, when I was unemployed I did try to keep myself busy too, I would run my dogs for a while or do yard work or even just read a book. I don't really feel the need to be filling every hour with shit, I can just sit with a book, my headphones on and a good album playing or my guitar and feel good about my day as long as I take a break in eating cheetos and playing video games....
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on October 31, 2012, 12:56:13 PM
See, I've barely gamed at all.  I'm in one of those "too busy setting up my computer to play games to actually play them" phases.

Really should get back to ME2.  You know, for testing purposes.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on October 31, 2012, 01:34:17 PM
This job is shit. 

I have no desire to enumerate the reasons why this job is ass.  Be satisfied that, even if you're unemployed, chances are your job is better than mine.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on October 31, 2012, 01:37:15 PM
Okay, that was out of line.  I have a paycheck.  But the problem is that the supervisors have this good ol boy club that I am not a part of, so everyone outside that circle is miserable, spending their days counting down until they get that call for a better job outside.

I want to job hunt, but I would rather finish school first.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on October 31, 2012, 01:52:45 PM
Welp, thanks to Google Street View it is clear to me that that address is not a doctor's office, it is some dude's house.  Possibly the doctor's, I don't know, but at any rate it saved me biking over there to see what's up.

The next half-dozen pulmonologists it lists are all at the local hospital, and after that is the guy I already went to and don't like very much.  Sigh.  I just want a new inhaler, dammit.

Guess I can still go buy comics, though.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 31, 2012, 01:55:22 PM
'Course I still fall asleep at work once in a while.

Annnnnnnd in the meeting today. In spite of all the pop I drank. God those things are so boring.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on October 31, 2012, 02:16:56 PM
Welp, thanks to Google Street View it is clear to me that that address is not a doctor's office, it is some dude's house.  Possibly the doctor's, I don't know, but at any rate it saved me biking over there to see what's up.

The next half-dozen pulmonologists it lists are all at the local hospital, and after that is the guy I already went to and don't like very much.  Sigh.  I just want a new inhaler, dammit.

Guess I can still go buy comics, though.

Many doctors operate their offices out of their homes.  This is where my Dentist's office is (http://goo.gl/maps/YDYzO).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on October 31, 2012, 02:18:53 PM
I fall asleep at practically every meeting.  I'd worry about developing a reputation for it except the clockwork regularity means nobody particularly cares.  I think.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 31, 2012, 02:25:52 PM
Yeah, but aren't you the manager?

I mean, this is far from the first meeting I've ever fallen asleep in, but still...
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on October 31, 2012, 02:55:13 PM
I'm the lead of a team that currently has one person on it, who is the lead.

So, no, not a manager.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 31, 2012, 04:44:54 PM
I'm the lead of a team that currently has one person on it, who is the lead.

So, no, not a manager.

No wonder you can get away with falling asleep during the team meeting.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on October 31, 2012, 05:19:41 PM
And why they let all those sexual harassment complaints slide.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 31, 2012, 05:39:06 PM
I can just picture Brent in an empty room scratching himself Al Bundy style, then later filing a complaint with HR.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Caithness on November 01, 2012, 08:32:27 PM
Today I worked for the first time since 2008.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on November 01, 2012, 09:00:36 PM
THANKS OBAMA.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 02, 2012, 02:17:14 PM
So cutting out coffee in the mornings and actually making a point to get enough sleep has switched my mid-afternoon mood swing from "lethargic" to "ridiculously energetic".

Too bad I'm exactly the same amount of unproductive in both states.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Malikial on November 02, 2012, 02:26:38 PM
I never really have mood swings during the day... but as is evident by my activities in #Finalfight and various other places, I'm pretty much amped up all the time unless it's within 15 minutes of me waking up. I'm a short energetic fuck and that is probably even more annoying then a person who gets drowsy for a bit in the afternoon.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 05, 2012, 11:25:33 AM
Hm, I'm only backlogged by 25 tasks.  Something must be wrong.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on November 06, 2012, 04:01:22 AM
Pretty sure at this point I'm using hurricane fallout as an excuse to unofficially quit my job. At the very least I consider it a position that does not warrant waiting outside a gas station for an hour at five AM more than three days in a row for a chance to get gas.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on November 06, 2012, 01:12:35 PM
You can move in with me if you have to. :D
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 06, 2012, 03:59:05 PM
PANIC BECAUSE OF AN IMPOSSIBLE DEADLINE
:advice:
SCREW SHIT UP AND WASTE A WHOLE DAY
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Malikial on November 06, 2012, 04:19:33 PM
I WANT MY VERY OWN BEATBANDIT, I DON'T WANNA SHARE WITH JAMES!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on November 06, 2012, 04:49:13 PM
I'll be your BeatBandit. :suave:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Malikial on November 06, 2012, 06:52:09 PM
YES!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on November 06, 2012, 07:27:06 PM
Are you entranced by his sexy rhythm?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on November 08, 2012, 12:45:02 PM
Didn't get the last job; on to the next one.  (Or one after the next?  I'm not sure how this works anymore.)  Sounds about like the last few, in terms of duties, pay, location, and direct-hire, which is good.  And this time I'm the only name submitted (so far).

Fingers crossed for the latest Sisyphean endeavor.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Healy on November 08, 2012, 08:02:02 PM
Good luck! You deserve it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on November 09, 2012, 06:11:27 AM
You can move in with me if you have to. :D
Sure, okay.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on November 09, 2012, 07:45:41 AM
Today is my second consecutive ten-hour split shift. I'm prepping, cooking, and serving every meal today.

Wish I had as much faith in my bad knee as my boss does.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Disposable Ninja on November 09, 2012, 07:31:39 PM
so uh... I'm apparently working this Kenny Loggins show tomorrow morning.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on November 09, 2012, 08:16:52 PM
so uh... I'm apparently working this Kenny Loggins show tomorrow morning.
That's a ride into the danger zone if I ever heard it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Disposable Ninja on November 10, 2012, 02:17:03 PM
And I finished my contracted time before he even showed up. Rats.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on November 11, 2012, 09:57:43 AM
I work all day today which is kind of a pain in the ass but at the same time I'm kinda glad because this is the last day I'll be a film projectionist. After I run these twenty-four shows it's all over and on to something new and exciting. I'm sad to see it go but digital cinema gives me a whole new challange and a whole new skill set. I have to confess I'm a little scared of all the things I don't know about digital cinema but there is no doubt in my mind that the benefits far outway the fears I have.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on November 11, 2012, 11:18:25 AM
Walking down the hall to the little room we keep the drink machine in. Right as I get to the door, it opens, and out walks... A golden retriever!

Followed shortly by her owner, visiting one of our residents. Still... Did not see that coming.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on November 15, 2012, 10:21:50 AM
DES has invited/threatened me to come to some kind of Reemployment Services Orientation next week.  Next Wednesday, to be precise, because apparently when you look at a five-week period where someone has a flexible schedule, the absolute BEST day you can demand he come in for something is the day before Thanksgiving.  At least they didn't schedule it for Friday, I guess.

At a glance (https://duckduckgo.com/?q=%22Reemployment+Services+Orientation%22), they just select random recently-unemployed people for these things.  As a currently unemployed/chronically underemployed computer scientist, I am not entirely sure I should be in the same seminar as the high-school dropout who doesn't own a computer.

(And that's no disrespect to That Guy, by any means.  He deserves assistance and I hope DES can give him all the assistance he needs.  I'm just not confident that his needs and my needs will be served in the same one-to-three-hour period.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 15, 2012, 04:52:22 PM
Okay, you know what?  Listening to loud Japanese phone conversations from the cubicle across from me nearly fucking constantly has pretty much cured me of my chronic affliction of wanting to learn Japanese.  Thanks, guy.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on November 15, 2012, 05:11:56 PM
I thought you already knew Japanese Brentai.
Or am I confusing you with someone else again?

EDIT:
JAPANESE BRENTAI
:advice:
WITH RESTORED-BUT-CENSORED BUKKAKE ACTION
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on November 15, 2012, 06:23:35 PM
Japanese Brentai: like American Brentai, but with a bunch of creepy fetishes.

Look out, Shirogane no Uta.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 17, 2012, 12:18:08 AM
For the sixth weekend in seven weeks the IT guys are breaking the system on Sunday, which means I have to work a 12-hour shift on Saturday. I already work 10 hours normally, so not a huge issue, but the zero warning is getting annoying (and if it's annoying to me, a guy with not much to do outside of work, god knows how people with families and actual shit to do feel about it).

Maybe if all this tinkering actually reduced the number of crippling IT outages we've had int he past three months I'd mind less. Instead they seem to be getting worse. Maybe they shouldn't have cut the budget for the new system integration and laid off 80% of the people working on the development of what's supposed to be our core system. NAHHHHHHH...
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 17, 2012, 06:32:20 PM
You know you have reached something close to the job hatred saturation point when you come back after a two-week vacation, have what is by and large a terribly easy day and still desperately want to be anywhere else.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ocksi on November 17, 2012, 06:34:46 PM
Uhhhhhhhhhhh

That's every job after vacation
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on November 17, 2012, 06:35:23 PM
Yeah.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 17, 2012, 06:57:30 PM
I dunno about you guys, but I usually have more tolerance for a job after vacation.

:shrug:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 17, 2012, 07:25:35 PM
Would be neat if I had a vacation or even a four-day weekend where I wasn't obligated to do some other bullshit, to serve as a baseline.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on November 17, 2012, 09:14:39 PM
Uhhhhhhhhhhh

That's every job after vacation
Yeah.

Wait.  You guys come back from vacation and don't have two weeks' worth of shit to make up?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on November 17, 2012, 10:29:43 PM
When I was in high school, I got bedridden with pneumonia for two weeks. When I came back to school and asked for the work I missed the teachers said there was none.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 17, 2012, 10:35:46 PM
Huh.  When I had the same thing happen in middle school they just dumped it all on me at once without any counseling and then kicked me out of the program when I wasn't able to catch up with it and my normal workload within a month.

Incidentally I think that's exactly when I stopped caring.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on November 17, 2012, 10:45:47 PM
Uhhhhhhhhhhh

That's every job after vacation
Yeah.

Wait.  You guys come back from vacation and don't have two weeks' worth of shit to make up?

Yeah, that. I was going to make a joke about how you could tell IM was non-essential because he didn't think vacations were a terrible waste of time that just set you back two weeks but thought it might be in poor taste.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on November 17, 2012, 10:46:05 PM
Huh.  When I had the same thing happen in middle school they just dumped it all on me at once without any counseling and then kicked me out of the program when I wasn't able to catch up with it and my normal workload within a month.

Yeah, that happened to me in third grade.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mazian on November 17, 2012, 10:52:44 PM
When I was in high school, I got bedridden with pneumonia for two weeks. When I came back to school and asked for the work I missed the teachers said there was none.

In eighth grade, I got mono and was out for a month.  But then I didn't have any work to make up: it was near the end of the year and the school administrators asked that I not come back, because I would make their attendance statistics look bad.  Apparently this rated above "actually teaching students" in their list of concerns.

I still live in fear that someday, someone will care that I am technically an eighth-grade dropout and send me back.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 17, 2012, 11:13:14 PM
Uhhhhhhhhhhh

That's every job after vacation
Yeah.

Wait.  You guys come back from vacation and don't have two weeks' worth of shit to make up?

I dunno about anyone else, but I usually don't have much when I get back because I try to get as much stuff squared away as I can before I go (and I've been gradually engineering stuff at work so that I have less follow-up work to do). And I do all my email catching-up on the day I come back, but before I actually have to go into work.

Amusingly, some of the old-timers have commented that I now sound like I've been there for a decade, even though I've been at the current job for less than two years.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 17, 2012, 11:14:09 PM
Oh and there was a denouement to the "Lying asshole was rehired" story. Turns out he had school lined up, so he just bailed mid-week after once again not really doing anything for a month. Dude played management like a fiddle. He probably didn't even expect to be rehired but applied anyway when he saw the posting go up. Laughing all the way...
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on November 18, 2012, 12:05:39 AM
Huh.  When I had the same thing happen in middle school they just dumped it all on me at once without any counseling and then kicked me out of the program when I wasn't able to catch up with it and my normal workload within a month.

Yeah, that happened to me in third grade.

I got my pneumonia in kindergarten. It was hell. So much finger painting to catch up on.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on November 18, 2012, 12:32:36 AM
Huh.  When I had the same thing happen in middle school they just dumped it all on me at once without any counseling and then kicked me out of the program when I wasn't able to catch up with it and my normal workload within a month.

Yeah, that happened to me in third grade.

I got my pneumonia in kindergarten. It was hell. So much finger painting to catch up on.

Oh- Oh yeah? Well I got my pneumonia when I was still a twinkle in dad's eye!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on November 18, 2012, 10:08:36 AM
I dunno about anyone else, but I usually don't have much when I get back because I try to get as much stuff squared away as I can before I go (and I've been gradually engineering stuff at work so that I have less follow-up work to do).

Yeah, unfortunately I've never really had a position where I could do that.  My last four years of work have largely involved shipping/receiving, which tends to pile up when you're not there even if you've got somebody else trying to cover it on top of their regular work.  And before that was the ISP gig that became a one-man operation any time I was off.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on November 18, 2012, 11:00:37 AM
What the hell's a "vacation"?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on November 26, 2012, 02:17:06 PM
I just got assigned a new project!

I know nothing about it except that it's backed personally by our CEO, and it involves YouTube somehow.

How frightened should I be?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on November 26, 2012, 03:22:58 PM
RUN

RUN

RUN

Pretend I linked to a Sinistar sound bite.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on November 28, 2012, 02:57:30 PM
So I just learned I may not have a job past December 28th.

MERRY CHRISTMAS
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Malikial on November 28, 2012, 03:25:19 PM
:(
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 28, 2012, 03:31:20 PM
Um... I hope it wasn't because you turned down the previous assignment?

Did you even turn it down? I mean, I figure you knew we were kidding, but...
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on November 28, 2012, 04:45:43 PM
Nope, I did not turn it down! It has nothing to do with that, anyway.

It's actually because my contract is up for renewal on the 28th, but the person who was supposed to approve said renewal went and got herself pregnant, and had to take some time of to have her kid. The guy who replaced her has decided that he's not going to renew ANY contracts(omg he's closing all the loops), and mine just happens to be the first to fall.

My manager and director are both trying to convince him that they absolutely need to renew my contract, but who knows if they'll be successful.

Updating my resume, just in case.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MarsDragon on December 13, 2012, 06:56:33 PM
I am so sick of supporting IE6, guys.

So so sick.

(I'm in international eCommerce, which in this case means China, and IE6 is still 20% of the users we get. We can't just drop it.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on December 13, 2012, 10:59:42 PM
This is where I say something horrifically racist about the Chinese, right?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on December 20, 2012, 05:11:27 PM
"Sir, what's your father's name."

"I don't know... I call him 'dad'".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on December 20, 2012, 06:51:13 PM
And now we know why Superman drinks.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 06, 2013, 12:38:34 PM
Today at work, an enraged man demaned my name, rank, serial number, and underwear size. So I provided my name, rank, serial number, and underwear size.

:glee:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Defenestration on January 08, 2013, 11:42:28 AM
"Well, that's okay that you don't have internet on your console. We can still update the system software with an external hard drive and a computer!"
"Oh god what that sounds hard."
"It's really not, I'll walk you through it. You have a computer with internet, right?"
"Yes."
"And do you have an external hard drive?"
"Say what?"
"A hard drive that is on the outside of the computer that you hook up with a USB cable."
"What in the world are you saying!"
"It's a box that has computer storage in it and you can hook it up to your computer with a wire. But that's okay it sounds like you don't have o..."
"No tell me what that is in english I may have it!"
I pause for a moment, not sure how to break it down further, and he guesses for me.
"Do you mean like a memory box?"
"...Yes sir, like a memory box."
 :pfff:

Mystifyingly, the memory box *was* an external HDD. How do you have enough knowledge to recognize your need for an External HDD but not know what an HDD is?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on January 08, 2013, 11:51:39 AM
Memories aren't stored on drives, Def. They're stored on brains, which are, in turn, stored in boxes.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on January 09, 2013, 10:56:56 AM
I was just handed 10 bucks and told to go get as many cookies as I could with it. This is my job. This is what I get paid to do.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on January 09, 2013, 11:20:00 AM
I was just handed 10 bucks and told to go get as many cookies as I could with it. This is my job. This is what I get paid to do.

Like, girl scout cookies, or...?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on January 09, 2013, 11:22:54 AM
What's the timeframe?  $10 probably gets a lot more cookie fixins than premade cookies.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on January 09, 2013, 11:33:32 AM
The timeframe was "right now", so I went to the deli downstairs and bought all of the cookies they had.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on January 09, 2013, 11:52:45 AM
Clearly, your workplace needs to organize its cookie needs better.  With only a day of notice, you could provide a massive pile of delicious homemade cookies for the same cost as last-second crappy stale deli disks.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on January 10, 2013, 10:55:09 PM
Welp, got an interview for an IT job on Monday, a lead on a programming gig in April (which gives me a couple months to brush up on .NET), and my current freelance WFH projects, while modest, are steady, and I hope to have something to share soon.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MarsDragon on January 11, 2013, 08:24:25 AM
Idiots on a different team broke the build again. And of course they do this right before the dev server builds, so they take down dev for the foreseeable future too. So my local machine and dev are broken, and I need both to actually do work today.

I would be less annoyed about this if that same team hadn't constantly broken the build in the release before this one too.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Zaratustra on January 11, 2013, 09:23:34 AM
My wife got fired from the coffee house she got for December - Nominally for "being late" and "not keeping with company outfit code" (I doubt there's one minimum wage drone in that place that can actually keep up with a 40-page rulebook), factually for being on the bad side of the management and being January.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on January 16, 2013, 10:47:18 PM
Two of my freelance deals have been approved over the past twenty-four hours, while it appears that I've been turned down for a set of four.  You win some and you lose some.

(And yeah I'm going to keep coy on this shit until it's actually available.  Counting chickens before they're hatched and so forth.  But hopefully I'll have something to link in the next week or so.)

As for day job shit...well, I thought Monday's interview went well but there's been no news and they said they were looking to hire someone next week, so that's not a great sign.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on January 18, 2013, 06:35:42 AM
Today I spoke to a Chinese man living in Australia. He started his sentences with a Chinese accent and finished them with an Australian accent.

 :nyoro~n:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on January 18, 2013, 02:20:53 PM
Turning failure into accomplishment: Last week I lost the only key to the security cable that keeps my laptop locked down to my desk. I submitted a ticket to get a new one, and they replaced the whole cable and gave me two new keys(one went in my desk, the other on my keyring). On my status report for the week, I put: "Submitted ticket to help desk regarding faulty laptop security cable. Ticket resolved, faulty cable replaced".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Healy on January 19, 2013, 03:39:22 AM
Today I spoke to a Chinese man living in Australia. He started his sentences with a Chinese accent and finished them with an Australian accent.

 :nyoro~n:
Kinda reminds me of the old stage stereotype of the guy who changes his accent to match the one of the person he's speaking to. Did he sound kinda like you near the end of the conversation?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on January 22, 2013, 11:32:00 AM
We found a Y2K38 bug that became active on Saturday!

EVRYBODY START PANICKING!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on January 22, 2013, 12:10:41 PM
Do you know how many people to make panic so that I might accumulate undue material wealth?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 23, 2013, 08:28:38 PM
This conversation took place entirely in bad Quebecois French:

"... and so where are all the phones I ordered?"
"Well, lemme see. I gotta check some stuff first."
"Yeah, okay."

[interlude]

"So what's your relationship to this business?"
"Ah, Boss. I'm the Boss-man. I do the business stuff. With my associates." (yes he really said it that way)
"Oh yeah? Well, we called the strip club and they said they don't know your name, never heard of you, didn't open any account, and don't want any phones."
*click*
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on January 29, 2013, 09:54:26 AM
The way this week is shaping up it seems like Monday is going to be the LEAST torturous.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on January 29, 2013, 10:21:13 AM
So you're the anti-Garfield?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on January 30, 2013, 10:49:57 PM
nega-Garfield
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on February 11, 2013, 12:09:34 PM
Complaints made about me by a certain co-worker:
1. I'm not available when she needs me. (Because I should totally alter my work schedule to cater to the whims of one project manager out of 20 or so.)
2. One day, I said I wouldn't be at the office, and then I came to the office. (He was available when he said he wouldn't be! BURN HIM!)
3. I'm on the internet during work hours. (This one is actually accurate, but so is everyone else here. Show me someone who spends every moment at work actually working, and I'll show you a goddamn liar.)
4. I'm not prepared for meetings. (Out of the 10 or so meetings we've had in the past couple of months, I'd say 8 of them had to be rescheduled or cancelled because she double-booked meetings, ran late from other meetings, or just didn't show up.)
5. I listen to music(with headphones) while working. (See #3. Also, if she can't hear it, why the fuck does it matter?)
5. My desk looks like a kindergarten. (???)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on February 11, 2013, 01:26:38 PM
5. My desk looks like a kindergarten. (???)
(http://i.imgur.com/di7ITrv.gif)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on February 11, 2013, 02:37:08 PM
She may have been referring to the fact that I have a bunch of Lego minfigures and other little toys on my desk. If that's the case, then:

a. There is no policy against having such things on your desk.
b. Everyone has some kind of random crap on their desk. In fact, one person on our floor seems to have turned his desk into a shrine to Captain America. As long as it's not offensive, and not distracting/hurting anyone, I don't see the problem.
c. It's none of her fucking business what I put on my desk.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Silversong on February 11, 2013, 07:25:45 PM
Teddy, is this certain co-worker generally reviled as a busybody no-good-nik? Because it sounds like she ought to be and probably is and if so you can just go have a good chuckle about it with your other co-workers around the water cooler.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Malikial on February 11, 2013, 08:48:00 PM
I gotta say, everything but #3 and 5(But only if listening to music slows down productivity) seems like bullshit. Number 3 on the other hand... when I was managing people I would fire them for shit like this and I PERSONALLY do not use the internet for longer than the time it takes to type out the occasional text(and no more than 5 texts an hour, I have limits to which I will allow my hypocrisy) while at work. But, it was long ago established that I am a crazy working robot due to my dislike of any type of break or distraction from my goal while working... if I can get away with it I refuse to take lunch or 15 minute breaks during the work day because they break my routine. I've only worked at one job that didn't have corporate rules in place that make it mandatory to take some sort of break every 9 hours or so. Still if your job has clear cut internet usage rules and you are breaking them, saying, "So is everyone else." even if it's true will have no effect on the outcome other than to maybe get other people also in trouble. Your bosses are not going to care that everyone else does it too if someone is giving them specific reason to look at you. It sucks, but it's how shit works.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 11, 2013, 09:17:38 PM
Not necessarily.

I'm not making excuses for people who fuck off all day, but in departments where a person is rated by work completed rather than use of time, then that is the relevant measure of the employee and not what they're doing at every minute. People have different work patterns and some workplaces have an allowance for that.

If there's a culture that says "look we don't really care what you do as long as you shit gets done and you're not too obnoxious about it", then it's valid to say "That's what everybody else does". Only you don't actually SAY "That's what everybody else does" you just point out that acceptable use has been established in the department for however long this has been a thing. You have to say that you are working within the established environment of the department or something similar to that. The key is to not be blaming your co-workers.

Because it IS bullshit for someone to be singled out for something an entire department is doing. If you do that as a manager, you poison the well and risk being labelled as a manager who targets people or has an axe to grind with specific workers.

If on the other hand you're the manager in that situation and you think your department is fucking off way too much or that a large number of them are gaming the system, then you FIRST raise it with the whole team - or maybe even consult with your general manager/director/whatever superior before that, to look at maybe changing the production requirements.

You also have to be careful because this can happen innocently over time if jobs in a department get easier (which they should! A good manager should ALWAYS bee looking for ways to do this!) and of course employees aren't going to speak up and say "Hey make my job harder." (well, sometimes they do, but not most of the time).

I mean, it's a tough situation to handle, because you have to correctly assess if it's one or two guys or if it's the whole department. You can't afford to be wrong because that's some real chocolatey shit-dip all-round if you are.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on February 11, 2013, 09:32:27 PM
There's a huge difference between a service position and an office position.  In service, yes, if you're fucking off an especially fucking off somewhere where people can see you, you're doing something wrong.  In an office position it's a lot more wishy-washy and the general theory is that, if a person is hitting all their deadlines and not using company bandwidth for anything too obscene or traffic-heavy or insecure or (policies), then let them do whatever the fuck it is that lets them keep performing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 11, 2013, 09:45:39 PM
What Brentai said.

If it wasn't clear, I was referring only to office-type stuff (since Ted works in an office environment). I figured we were all on the same page there, but I suppose it's possible someone thought otherwise, so might as well be clear.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Malikial on February 11, 2013, 09:49:21 PM
I mean, I love Ted... probably too much... 
Ted is so awesome...
Ahem... sorry...

So, um... I'm willing to bet he's not doing anything wrong and I don't think he should get in trouble. Hell, I was gonna talk to him about it later, not on the boards, and be like, "Yo dawg, I don't think you should get fired or anything I didn't want to give that impression on the forum and re-reading my post it looks like I did. I just think that, if someone above you in corporate structure has a nit in their shit about you then maybe you should try to change your actions a bit, if only until it blows over or figure something else out. It's not really fair but it's better than getting fired and being forced to make a, 'I can't believe I got fired for doing something everyone else was already doing' post on the forum."

I'm posting this here now because I do want to clarify, I am crazy about work and I don't think anyone else should be... I don't think anything mentioned is worth getting him fired as long as it does not affect productivity. I highly doubt Ted is doing anything wrong and I love every part of him.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on February 11, 2013, 09:55:41 PM
Without trying to get into the 'I don't know what I'm talking about because obviously I've only ever worked at shit jobs' argument I think the best thing you can do is just discuss with the person exactly what they have a problem with and exactly why. I'm not saying make excuses or even to argue with someone, but if you explain to them that listening to music helps you work more efficiently (it does for me at least) and that you're just trying to make your desk a comfortable environment which also helps your efficiency she'd be hard pressed to keep bitching about those things.

At the end of the day she's basically complaining that you aren't being professional enough. You should address this also, but in a more meaningful way. Ask her point blank what she thinks you need to improve on and put together some actionable plan to do so along with clear checkpoints for you to show you're making progress.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on February 11, 2013, 10:00:04 PM
Of course I'm only suggesting this if you think there is actually a reasonable problem that you need to correct so that you don't face disciplinary actions. You know more than us, she might just have been having a bad day or something. Bitches be trippin', man.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on February 11, 2013, 10:19:25 PM
Ask her point blank what she thinks you need to improve on and put together some actionable plan to do so along with clear checkpoints for you to show you're making progress.

Ideally that is the way to proceed, in case you are surrounded by honest and reasonable people. If the manager is just a douchemo though, that's pretty much asking to be slapped with some vile "doesn't understand the demands of the job" or "needs constant handholding" BS.

Is tricky.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 11, 2013, 11:19:18 PM
Also, if I understand correctly she's not his direct superior. She's someone who outranks him who he has to submit stuff to. Which is awkwaaaarrrrd, but happens often enough int he corporate world.

It may turn out that "ignore her" is the best option, though you have to be careful about that. It's probably correct under the following circumstances:

a) Her continued bitching will make her look much worse than Ted.

b) This is some "just a bad day" shit that will blow over (have to be verrry careful about assumptions like that though).

c) Ted's own direct manager doesn't give a shit what this lady thinks.

If none of those apply, then talking to his direct manager about it may be the best idea, so long as he's on good terms with his direct manager.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on February 12, 2013, 02:36:23 AM
Ask her point blank what she thinks you need to improve on and put together some actionable plan to do so along with clear checkpoints for you to show you're making progress.

Ideally that is the way to proceed, in case you are surrounded by honest and reasonable people. If the manager is just a douchemo though, that's pretty much asking to be slapped with some vile "doesn't understand the demands of the job" or "needs constant handholding" BS.

Is tricky.

Yeah, I wouldn't do this for the latter two reasons. I've seen that go down way too much in an office environment. ESPECIALLY if you are expected to set your own work pace - if that's the kind of job we're talking about here, asking for that kind of planning would be a poor career move to say the least. I would, however, go to your boss and say 'Hey, this lady is harassing me for stuff that has been established as acceptable in the work place'. It's my experience that managers in office environments don't like it when other people swing out of the rafters to manage their people. Pulling rank on someone else's employees is a horseshit thing to do and it hurts morale and productivity across the board. I've never been in a functional workplace where this was allowed, and if this kind of thing goes on constantly where you work Ted, it's probably time to brush up your resume. That shit isn't worth it, unless they're paying you a hell of a lot of money (and if this kind of shit is tolerated where you work, they're probably not)

From what this sounds like to me, the project manager is a 30-something who has spent their entire life doing bullshit work and now that they have some modicum of power they use it to bully people around them. Having once worked as a project manager in an office full of project managers (that was a weird {also: awful. Never do this profession} fucking job) these people are a constant in the profession and the best way to deal with them is to put up with as little of their bullshit as possible. 'I am above you on the totem pole' does not give someone a license to set workplace expectations for you, unless you're that person's direct report. (and even then, I would argue that a job that micromanages so much you can't have toys on your desk is a job not worth fucking working)

Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on February 12, 2013, 07:22:04 AM
Wow, I was not expecting this much discussion. Let me clear up a couple of points.

1. We do have an acceptable use policy. It basically boils down to, "don't use the computers for anything illegal or offensive, and limit personal use so that it doesn't affect your productivity". My productivity has never suffered because I was chatting with my mom on facebook.

2. She's not my direct supervisor; I just do some work for her. However, she is one of the two managers on the biggest project we have going right now, so my manager was just informing me that she had made these complaints, with the implication that he knew they were mostly bs, but we have to keep her happy. So he said I should start sending her an email every Monday laying out what work I'd be doing for her project that week, and asking her to reach out to me if she had anything else she needed help with. Which I did! She did not respond.

3. She's not known as a busybody so much as someone who holds anyone who works for/under her up to ridiculously high standards. Which is kind of hilarious, since...

Yesterday we had a meeting scheduled in the morning to discuss some project work. She emailed me about 10 minutes before the meeting was supposed to start, asking to reschedule it for 1:30 in the afternoon. So I did! She didn't show up for the rescheduled meeting. I tried to contact her via email and instant messenger, and got no response until a couple of hours later, when she told me she had sent me a message in the morning saying she wasn't going to be at the meeting. You know, the message where she actually HADN'T said that, but HAD asked me to reschedule to a specific time.

I thought briefly about mentioning that to my manager, but a. I'm not that petty and b. I'd rather be seen as someone who stays above the fray on this kind of crap.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on February 12, 2013, 08:14:43 AM
That's something you should at least be keeping the logs of if you're not.

I can understand not jumping back on top of her, but if the next time she accuses you of slowing productivity you can turn around and tell the bosses what's actually doing it, she may think twice before using you as a scapegoat again.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 12, 2013, 08:23:20 AM
Sending stuff to her manager is a very dangerous game, but I do agree you should be keeping logs of shit that stupid.

Clearly she's dumb enough to pull shit like that in email, so she may be dumb enough to do other things.

Cover Your Ass! The (rather unfortunate) watchword of an office!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on February 12, 2013, 09:01:18 AM
Yep, that is exactly what I am doing. I doubt it will matter much in the long run, though; the project she's assigned to is going to be ending in a couple of months, and I don't think she'll be sticking around after that.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 13, 2013, 07:00:57 PM
Hilarity today!

So a bit of backstory. At work, there are three ranks of "regular schmucks". There's the bottom of the shitpile regular analysts (me), and two types of Senior reps, regular senior reps and trending reps.

Of course, senior reps have the pay grade of a manager and we're one tier below that, so we're all several steps up from minimum wage call centre slaves, "regular schmucks" is only a relevant description within my department. The only real difference is that senior reps get their stuff fed to them, work at higher volumes, and are generally seen as more capable (they can take some manager functions in a pinch, etc). Regular seniors do what we do, but on a larger scale (they work a lot of corporate and business account fraud). Trending reps look for overall trends and patterns.

The best way to describe our operation is that every single day an elephant comes in and takes a giant shit in the middle of the floor. And by and large most of us dumbfucks sit there with our shovels, playing janitor in a world of stink. The only people in the department who actually say "Hey, maybe we should find a way to stop that elephant from coming in here" are the trending reps. Basically the only work that seems at all interesting or fun or anything at all is the trending team.

The trending team is tiny (two people), but they are looking to expand. Now, I put myself forward for an opening they posted, and have been trying to do some work on the side (without even knowing a position was coming up). I did this in spite of the fact that there are two people in the department who are very obviously being groomed for trending roles (one guy who totally deserves it, because he knows the systems inside and out and one guy who's clearly being set up to be a manager someday in the future - neither of them are bad guys and they both work hard, though the second due has become something of an obvious brown-noser). My goal is mainly to show I'm interested, maybe to slip in if another slot opens later.

It's kind of frustrating because I have the shit manager who won't help me even when I ask him directly, whereas employees of ANY OTHER MANAGER all get coaching and help to work towards promotions. In fact my manager is so bad they recently shuffled a third of his team away (But not me! So much for that opportunity!). In fact another person who sits near me is starting to eat my lunch so to speak (stealing my slots in meetings relevant to the trending department) thanks to her manager's help (she still has no chance, but damned if that helps me! And those meetings are literally the only interesting thing I get to attend all week!).

Anyway, I work weekends. My days off are Monday and Tuesday (and Friday - I work 4x10h). So I come in today and plant my butt in my seat and begin looking at the emails from the past two days. I don't get very far when I see a reminder come up: "HI YOUR INTERVIEW IS ONE MINUTE AGO".

Yep. Stupid assholes sent my notification on my off day and nobody called to tell me or anything. I went in late and winged it, but fuck me if I didn't have to laugh all the way down, because the fuck else am I supposed to do? I mean, I wasn't going to get the damn job anyway, but I really don't need help to make myself look any dumber than I already am.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on February 13, 2013, 08:37:25 PM
It's kind of frustrating because I have the shit manager who won't help me even when I ask him directly, whereas employees of ANY OTHER MANAGER all get coaching and help to work towards promotions. In fact my manager is so bad they recently shuffled a third of his team away (But not me! So much for that opportunity!). In fact another person who sits near me is starting to eat my lunch so to speak (stealing my slots in meetings relevant to the trending department) thanks to her manager's help (she still has no chance, but damned if that helps me! And those meetings are literally the only interesting thing I get to attend all week!).

But don't you see, Mongrel? You're his only friend.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 13, 2013, 08:43:35 PM
Uh, that's not really that far off. I think he's as useless as tits on a brass bull (he got the job because his mom used to be a VP and he knows sweet fuck all about the job or about being a manager), but he almost never bugs me about anything and I don't actually hate the guy.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 13, 2013, 08:50:02 PM
I also thought it was awesome that I wore a crappier shirt and had off-colour socks today because the damn washing machines have been busted, so I was like "Ah whatever, no one's going to give a shit today."

:8V:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on February 14, 2013, 05:13:43 AM
A reenactment of what became of Mongrel's interview:

peter gibbons interview (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g2_Yi-1Ryf4#)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 14, 2013, 06:06:56 AM
A reenactment of what became of Mongrel's interview:

peter gibbons interview (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g2_Yi-1Ryf4#)

I'd only be half kidding if I said that's about right.

This is pretty much going to be a totally lost year career-wise. I've passed my sell-by date here without getting the magic touch from on high, which means I will basically never enter a real promotion track, and my best expectation is to scratch and claw for years just to make senior rep and never get any higher.

But since I was fired from every previous job I've ever held at around the two year mark (for behaviour and or comments uncannily like that interview above, after I stopped tolerating terrible managers), I need to hang aroud here for at least another year, year-and-a-half, just to prevent my resume from permanently looking like a total disaster.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on February 14, 2013, 03:23:24 PM
If it makes you feel any better, Mongrel, in the last three days I've had occasion to screw up in front of two directors and the VP.

Not my best week, that's for sure.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 14, 2013, 08:01:06 PM
(http://gifs.gifbin.com/032010/1267528027_high-five_fail.gif)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on February 15, 2013, 08:15:08 AM
Also, the company owes me a lot of money and it looks like I'm going to have to go get aggressive about it if I ever want to see it.  Weighing my options here.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 15, 2013, 08:35:01 AM
Like freelance fees, or unpaid hours, or what?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on February 15, 2013, 11:59:40 AM
http://fitnesssf.com/ (http://fitnesssf.com/)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 15, 2013, 12:50:29 PM
Oh man, that is sweet indeed.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on February 15, 2013, 12:54:06 PM
The Facebook profiles of the company make it sound like the guy is just trying to extract more money than the contract stipulated.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on February 15, 2013, 04:01:18 PM
Like freelance fees, or unpaid hours, or what?

Educational assistance.

You can call that whining about free money if you like, but keep in mind that it's tuition already paid from my own credit line on good faith that it would be reimbursed, so I sort of have a month-sized hole in my finances right now.  And I'm only in school in the first place because the company demanded it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 15, 2013, 05:20:48 PM
I wouldn't call that whining about free money any more than I would call dental benefits whining for free money.

I'd wait for the course to be completed though before starting shit over it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on February 18, 2013, 09:25:45 PM
Man, today was my shortest interview ever.  Just weird; just a bunch of questions about what I knew and could do, none of the usual cliches about "What's your greatest strength and weakness?", "Do you have any questions for me?", etc.

I would take it as an indication that they dismissed me out-of-hand, except my rep says this company does it like that with everybody.

It's not a bad thing -- an interview that skips over the bullshit and goes over my bullet points is fine by me -- but it's tough to get a read on what I should expect.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on February 18, 2013, 11:06:15 PM
Other than "Do you have any questions for me?" my interviews tend to stay on-topic too.  Of course, I'm the bottom interviewer out of an entire command chain, so they probably all run into the usual bullshit somewhere along the line.

Getting feedback from the candidate is just polite, I think, and you usually glean more information from the questions they ask than the ones you do.  The rest of those stock questions are more or less designed to help out managers who aren't exactly clear on what they're looking for - they tend to gravitate to whoever does the best job of telling it to them.  The absence of all that is a good sign, since they apparently have a skillset they're looking for, already know from your CV that you can fit into it, and just needed you there for a few minutes to verify that you don't smell like a used mop and can string two sentences together without stammering.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on February 19, 2013, 11:55:05 AM
and just needed you there for a few minutes to verify that you don't smell like a used mop and can string two sentences together without stammering.

My brief experience in IT earlier in life indicates that these are not necessarily reasons you won't get hired.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on February 19, 2013, 12:54:14 PM
Those might just be consequences of being an IT guy for too long, R^2.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: JDigital on February 19, 2013, 02:31:54 PM
The Facebook profiles of the company make it sound like the guy is just trying to extract more money than the contract stipulated.

The site came back. I just spotted this:
http://fitnesssf.tumblr.com/post/43166981561/onthewaytoourwebsite (http://fitnesssf.tumblr.com/post/43166981561/onthewaytoourwebsite)

They may have paid $5,000, but that doesn't necessarily mean they paid their bill in full. It's common for freelancers to take half up front, half on completion. It's also common for projects to go over time and budget, and for bad clients to try find excuses to wriggle out of payment.

The professional thing to do would be to take this to court. Taking down a client's website like this entertaining, but possibly illegal.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on February 19, 2013, 05:17:52 PM
The Facebook profiles of the company make it sound like the guy is just trying to extract more money than the contract stipulated.

The site came back. I just spotted this:
http://fitnesssf.tumblr.com/post/43166981561/onthewaytoourwebsite (http://fitnesssf.tumblr.com/post/43166981561/onthewaytoourwebsite)

They may have paid $5,000, but that doesn't necessarily mean they paid their bill in full. It's common for freelancers to take half up front, half on completion. It's also common for projects to go over time and budget, and for bad clients to try find excuses to wriggle out of payment.

The professional thing to do would be to take this to court. Taking down a client's website like this entertaining, but possibly illegal.

It is possible for things to go over time and budget, which is why Frank should have renegotiated earlier. It's really a he said/she said at this point, but Fitness SF sounds like they paid him the amount upfront, after which he was four months late to deliver an unfinished project. The guy does have a point about freelancers and creative types getting screwed out of the work they do, but I don't feel that this is one of those instances. Sounds an awful lot like he's the one trying to take advantage of a client.

Ultimately, doing this to the client's website was a huge dick move, that not only affects his professional standing, but can hurt other freelancers who work as well. Things like this will make other companies treat freelancers worse if they think they're all greedy and willing to resort to ransoming to extract money.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on February 21, 2013, 05:02:24 AM
Next week / this weekend maybe I start my new job as a console operator for the shows at a planetarium.

Every night will be laser floyd night.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 21, 2013, 08:13:55 AM
Next week / this weekend maybe I start my new job as a console operator for the shows at a planetarium.

Every night will be laser floyd night.

Hahah, holy shit. That sounds like a sweet job.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 24, 2013, 10:43:57 AM
I think I've mentioned this before, but this office is LOADED with conspiracy nutcases. I don't know why or how, but it's just the most wacky shit.

Usually it's Eric Von Dainiken ancient aliens shit, or "the government secretly controls X".

Today it's a giant hidden fortress in the Nevada desert, because apparently the US possesses CLOAKING DEVICES.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on February 24, 2013, 11:44:41 AM
...Were they talking about Black Mesa?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 24, 2013, 12:16:42 PM
Oh man, I should troll the fuck out of them with that.  :whoops:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on February 24, 2013, 02:15:30 PM
Welp, nameservers are down at my old company.

My initial theory was that my old boss accidentally allowed the primary domain to expire, because whois says they're set to expire on 02-23-2014 -- suggesting maybe they expired on 02-23-2013 and he just renewed them and we're waiting for propagation.  But then I noticed it also says the record was last updated on 04-08-2009, which I think means it was renewed all the way through 2014 back then, meaning the date is just a coincidence.  (Also, the whois gives IP's for the nameservers and they're not responding to ping, suggesting it's not just a DNS resolution issue.)

On the one hand, I am so, so glad that I don't work there anymore.

On the other, I like to think this is not a mistake I ever would have made.

On the third hand, I did in fact send him an E-Mail (through the secondary domain, which is still functioning) and tell him I'm available if he needs an extra set of hands.

Anyhow, my domains are down for the moment.  And so are all the other customers'.  Again -- glad I'm not the guy having to deal with end users.  (Aside from my Web development clients, who let me know there was a problem in the first place.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on February 24, 2013, 05:51:39 PM
Oh man, I should troll the fuck out of them with that.  :whoops:

They'll believe it.

Gordon Freeman Calls Coast to Coast AM (Original) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IMATUkJMAxo#)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on February 24, 2013, 07:39:29 PM
The fact that he makes the logical leap from "portals" to "travel through other worlds" kind of makes me wonder if he's not playing along.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on February 24, 2013, 07:42:11 PM
Welp, nameservers are down at my old company.

My initial theory was that my old boss accidentally allowed the primary domain to expire, because whois says they're set to expire on 02-23-2014 -- suggesting maybe they expired on 02-23-2013 and he just renewed them and we're waiting for propagation.  But then I noticed it also says the record was last updated on 04-08-2009, which I think means it was renewed all the way through 2014 back then, meaning the date is just a coincidence.  (Also, the whois gives IP's for the nameservers and they're not responding to ping, suggesting it's not just a DNS resolution issue.)

On the one hand, I am so, so glad that I don't work there anymore.

On the other, I like to think this is not a mistake I ever would have made.

On the third hand, I did in fact send him an E-Mail (through the secondary domain, which is still functioning) and tell him I'm available if he needs an extra set of hands.

Anyhow, my domains are down for the moment.  And so are all the other customers'.  Again -- glad I'm not the guy having to deal with end users.  (Aside from my Web development clients, who let me know there was a problem in the first place.)

Looks like they're back up now, because your avatar is working again.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on February 25, 2013, 05:59:46 PM
The fact that he makes the logical leap from "portals" to "travel through other worlds" kind of makes me wonder if he's not playing along.

Noory is a lot more savvy than he lets on, but his career is proof that the opposite is true for his audience.

(i used to listen because it made me laugh)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MarsDragon on March 02, 2013, 11:03:41 AM
HP's slow implosion is finally hitting my team and holy shit things got fucked up in a hurry.

Polishing up my resume has turned from "eh it would be nice when I can get around to it" to "ESCAPE PLANS NOW".

Anyone want a web developer? I'm mostly frontend now and I've supported shit all the way back to IE6 (but I'd really like to not do that ever again). Or someone that can help me write a good resume because I have no real faith in my skills to do that.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 02, 2013, 12:14:28 PM
As always, my company has a ton of openings for people willing to live in South Orange County (which seems to be the sticking point for most people).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 02, 2013, 01:40:46 PM
The media panic over contaminated meat had one of the residents ask if we'd checked the beef we get for traces of horse.

True beef, or not true beef. That is equestrian.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on March 02, 2013, 03:16:29 PM
Really, the horse meat/beef scandal seems to delight and amuse me. I'm not a vegetarian or vegan by any measure, but it seems rather hypocritical of me to complain about what animals we're killing to eat. Much more scandalous is the idea that you're not getting 100% what it says on the box, but again, that's been a problem for meat and nearly every food for quite some time.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on March 02, 2013, 03:21:56 PM
It's quite a bit more complicated than that, as far as edibility and health concerns go.  What you can put in a cow is under-regulated but still practically Halal compared to what you can put in a horse that's not intended for human consumption.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on March 02, 2013, 03:34:15 PM
Well, yeah, and the reason for that is because We Do Not Eat Horse. I'm just more amused by the moral double-standard that comes with the idea of what we consider acceptable to kill and eat, which leads to his kind of situation in the first place.

It's the same kind of reaction I have when people express disgust with Asian countries because "they eat dog over there."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on March 02, 2013, 03:50:03 PM
True beef, or not true beef. That is equestrian.

Why aren't you making money off your humour?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on March 02, 2013, 03:59:20 PM
Tis nobler this way.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Malikial on March 02, 2013, 04:04:04 PM
Wait, wait, are we doing puns again?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on March 05, 2013, 12:09:32 PM
Someone called and complained about me today. Said I was rude and hostile. They didn't say it was because they were just some random dude on the street wanting me to give them a ride. And when I refused,  they approached my vehicle anyway.

Still got in trouble.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on March 12, 2013, 06:25:11 AM
New job is incredibly stressful. Already at the point where I'm having nightmares about it. At least I get my benefits soon.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 12, 2013, 06:52:33 AM
Sorry to hear it.  Good luck and I hope it beats the alternative.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 12, 2013, 01:17:56 PM
"Can you just start working 60 hours a week?"

"I'm already working 60 hours a week."

...

"Can you work 80 hours a week?"
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on March 12, 2013, 01:56:03 PM
"Nope."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on March 12, 2013, 03:25:22 PM
Would you even work those hours for three times your salary?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on March 12, 2013, 03:39:55 PM
For how long?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Dooly on March 13, 2013, 01:56:47 AM
You should have just said yes to the 60 hours per week, and they'd be happy.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on March 14, 2013, 07:01:52 PM
I was just on shift at an opening event that was so out of hand I basically did as much work as I would have at a friend's party.

I am officially declaring myself a professional partier.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on March 18, 2013, 04:35:05 PM
Why is this delivery driver taking so long?

OH. He accidentally picked up a prostitute.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 18, 2013, 05:03:10 PM
"Accidentally".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on March 18, 2013, 06:01:59 PM
Why is this delivery driver taking so long?

OH. He accidentally picked up a prostitute.

This sounds like a story duder. Maybe though not one for this board?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 18, 2013, 10:53:15 PM
Welp, got an interview on Wednesday, which is cool.

It's a 35-mile drive, which is considerably less cool.  Don't know why the fuck I keep getting jobs up on that side of town -- I guess the developments have been there long enough for companies to establish themselves?  It's in roughly the same neighborhood as jobs 3 and 4 on my 2011 list (http://www.corporate-sellout.com/index.php/2012/01/04/tempin-aint-easy/).  (Fun fact: I found that post by searching for "fuck these people".  It was already in my autocomplete list!)

So, y'know.  I will take the job if offered but not be broken up about it if I don't get it.

Still getting over a damn cold, which could of course have an impact on my interview skillz.  Guess I'll take my meds and hope for the best.

Would be nice if I had time to hit one of my old favorite eateries while I'm back up in that part of town, but I don't think I'll be able to swing that if I want to beat traffic.  And the last time I grabbed carryout on that side of town it was cold by the time I got home.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 20, 2013, 12:44:43 PM
Extra no-time-for-food-afterward now because I have a second interview two hours later on the other side of town.

I mean, I'll probably have some time to fuck around in-between.  For me to be late for the second interview the first one would have to run an hour and traffic would have to be especially bad afterward.  But it's still technically possible.

The 5 PM interview looks like a better gig, if not a better organization.  It's a NOC tech position instead of general tech support.  The fact that they're giving me an interview at 5 PM DOES suggest they're a 24-hour shop and might stick me with weird hours, but as I've said before, I'm perfectly okay with working night shifts in Phoenix in the summer.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on March 20, 2013, 01:00:14 PM
"Can you work 80 hours a week?"
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 20, 2013, 02:14:09 PM
20 min early despite having to detour around accident on freeway. Then spent 10 min at gate waiting for security to verify my id.

Still only 3:15 & next interview not til 5. Could stop for a slice but probably better off just going home for a bit.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on March 20, 2013, 09:32:03 PM
Coworker/manager was in the middle of a driveby shooting that involved a house with children in the lawn.
No one was injured. While everyone sensible ducked for cover, he stood like a moron. This gave him clear view of the vehicle and driver.

He said "They didn't shoot ME so what do I care?" and didn't talk to the cops at all.


In actually unrelated news, I am currently unemployed.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 21, 2013, 10:41:33 AM
Welp, I got one of 'em.  So that's good.  Should start on the 1st, unless this is all a terrible, elaborate April Fool's Day joke.

It's an extra buck an hour compared to my last job.  Which at least shows I'm moving up in the world.  And will hopefully cover the extra wear on my car for a 70-MILE ROUND TRIP.

Maybe one of the other ones will pan out and I'll get something a little closer/better.  But this is a damn sight better than unemployment, at least.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on March 21, 2013, 11:17:09 AM
Awesome, congrats, Thad.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 26, 2013, 07:37:23 PM
Got another offer.  The initial contract period is shorter and it's for a company I'm not crazy about, but it's a couple bucks more an hour than my first offer, probably 1/3 of the commute distance, and involves actual Web design, so I think it's definitely the superior option.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 26, 2013, 08:48:25 PM
An actual choice between jobs for Thad? What is the world coming to?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Malikial on March 26, 2013, 08:58:59 PM
Oh damn, time to start looking out for horsemen.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 27, 2013, 05:31:41 PM
It's worse than you guys think.  I done gone and started a bidding war.

Okay, so here's what I'm looking at:

Company A
Banking/insurance business
More prominent than Company B, but not as prominent in the computer industry
I talked them into offering me a couple bucks more than Company B
35-mile commute
Initial 6-month contract
Better benefits if I get hired on
They're planning on hiring on 1 guy from the team, and rep told me I'm the leading contender
The job is a Win7 rollout

Company B
Web company
8-mile commute
Initial 2-month contract
Budget is already in and they have funding to hire on the entire team
Job is Web design

Company C
Computer company
Way more prestigious than Company B -> would look the best on my resume of the 3
Slightly less pay than Company B
6-mile commute
Initial 12-month contract, can be extended as much as 18 months but after that there's no chance of a permanent position and I can't reapply for another temp position for another 6 months
Job is hardware testing
Haven't actually interviewed for this one yet; interview is tomorrow morning.

I have to choose by Friday.  So far I'm leaning Company B.  More than anything because I just do not want to deal with that commute ever again.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on March 27, 2013, 05:51:06 PM
You rent, right?  A, move closer if you're hired.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 27, 2013, 06:13:28 PM
How big is the pay difference, really? Like, is "A few bucks" $18 vs $15 or $14 vs $10, or what?

Also, after doing ten years of jobs of boring jobs which I hate, I gotta say that I think doing stuff you might actually enjoy also matters in this equation.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on March 27, 2013, 06:21:47 PM
You rent, right?  A, move closer if you're hired.

I wouldn't see it as so simple, though. The biggest issue with that is that the rent near Company A might be significantly higher, enough to offset the benefits and pay increase. Though that might also correlate with things to do and closer amenities. Which could also be a double-edged sword. A lower rent would mean a lower density of things like grocery stores, parks, post offices, movie theaters, bars, things to do in general. Which might end up with him having to make a 35-minute drive every time he wants to have a night out. This issue is why America has such long commutes in the first place.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 27, 2013, 07:12:00 PM
You rent, right?  A, move closer if you're hired.

But I don't WANT to live up on that end of town again.  I'm pretty happy with Tempe.  Though we don't know where my wife's going to be working in the fall yet.  Could be she'll be closer to that location, could be she'll be even farther.  Her best leads so far are east of here, while A is west.  I won't know by Friday, obviously, but educated guess says if we move closer to job A we'll be moving farther from her job.

How big is the pay difference, really? Like, is "A few bucks" $18 vs $15 or $14 vs $10, or what?

Signed an NDA and not really comfortable discussing pay in public.  But, keeping it vague: if I accept the lowest-paying of the three jobs, it will still be a better hourly wage than I've ever earned.  All three positions pay better than any of the numbers you just mentioned.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 27, 2013, 07:17:32 PM
I don't actually need to know real numbers, I'm just trying to get a sense of proportion (which, I figure you gathered). Like, "a few bucks more" is not a significant variable if we're we're talking relative differences that are less than 10%. 10% or more difference in pay, well, you'll start to notice that.

Though it's starting to sound to me like you've made up your mind and just want to make sure you're not missing anything obvious. Which is absolutely okay!

But how about the potential job satisfaction?  I don't think any NDA prevents you talking about what you think might happen there?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 27, 2013, 07:29:47 PM
I haven't heard you guys say anything about C.  I assume you're not counting what happens if you get C.  If you're not going to chain yourself to any of these places for the rest of your life, then resume padding is probably the best idea in the long run.

Otherwise, A sounds like :itsatrap:.  Take B.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 27, 2013, 07:54:08 PM
He also seems to be against C for the lack of security. But it's true that if he wants to shop around later for (potentially) better deals then the prestige of C matters.

Though in my experience, it's not the company that you work for so much as it is the position you held. Which may bring B and C closer together in that regard.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on March 27, 2013, 08:56:02 PM
Honestly B seems like the only one that is worth it.

The drop in pay is probably negated by the seventy mile round trip for A (don't just count gas into the expense, also count having to change your oil about ever two months, tires every two and some change years and all that jazz) and they're the only one that has already budgeted keeping all of you guys on and that seems a lot more secure than, "We can only keep one but you're in the lead", which, from experience, might just be something they're telling everyone to increase productivity and competition.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 27, 2013, 09:40:32 PM
I don't actually need to know real numbers, I'm just trying to get a sense of proportion (which, I figure you gathered). Like, "a few bucks more" is not a significant variable if we're we're talking relative differences that are less than 10%. 10% or more difference in pay, well, you'll start to notice that.

The increase of A over B is right about 10%.

Though it's starting to sound to me like you've made up your mind and just want to make sure you're not missing anything obvious. Which is absolutely okay!

I suppose that's probably true.  And truth be told my wife's probably more important in terms of planning things out than you guys are.  And she's right about there with me -- B sounds good but we'll probably second-guess ourselves a bit before all's said and done.

But how about the potential job satisfaction?  I don't think any NDA prevents you talking about what you think might happen there?

A is exactly the same work I've been doing for the past 4+ years.  It's a Windows 7 rollout.  It's decent enough work and I'm good at it; the quotas they ran by me suggested it's probably even going to be low-stress aside from the traffic part -- like I'll either have downtime or get ahead of schedule.

Buuut, like I say, it's the work I've been doing for years and I hate the idea of being stuck doing desktop support forever.  It's the job that's most like what I've been doing and least like what I want to do long-term.

Also -- I think I mentioned this at first but not in the comparison -- A starts out as 8-5 for the first month, but then for the next 5 it's 12-8.  Which means less traffic and less heat but also probably less time to see my wife or do general daytime tasks.

B is Web design but it's using some kind of in-house template.  The phone interview did not involve any technical questions, it was entirely about how fast I could work, how comfortable I'd be using an in-house template instead of the raw code I'm used to, and how I'd deal with angry customers.  (Which is weird because they also told me I would not be interacting directly with customers, that that's another guys job and he'll tell me what the customers want.)  All this suggests to me that they're a lot more concerned with quantity than quality and aren't looking for someone terribly proficient.  Which is kinda my impression of the company and why I didn't go to work for them as a phone tech when I had the chance 7 years ago.  (More on that in a bit.)

C is tough to gauge.  It could either be the most dynamic of the three or the most repetitive.  It involves testing software across various platforms (Windows, Mac, Android), setting up a test bench and automated scripts, that kind of thing.

Otherwise, A sounds like :itsatrap:.  Take B.

You know what's funny?  Seven years ago I had a choice between going to work at B (different job, same company) or a job up in north Phoenix, 2 or 3 miles from where A is.

On the one hand, I made the wrong call.  On the other, A is offering me ten dollars more an hour than that job did and will almost certainly be substantially easier than that one was.

He also seems to be against C for the lack of security. But it's true that if he wants to shop around later for (potentially) better deals then the prestige of C matters.

I don't consider any of them secure.  I am definitely considering the relative risks of "Definitely 12 months but no more than 18", "Definitely 6 months and possibly permanent", and "Definitely 2 months and the likeliest of the 3 to be permanent".  I'm sure there's a game theory solution.

Though in my experience, it's not the company that you work for so much as it is the position you held. Which may bring B and C closer together in that regard.

C's probably got the best job title, too, even though it's the worst pay.  It's that prestigious a company.

(My uncle worked there back around the turn of the century.  I think it was about 6 months.  It was still the pinnacle of his career in the computer industry.  He's an art teacher now.)

(don't just count gas into the expense, also count having to change your oil about ever two months, tires every two and some change years and all that jazz)

Believe me, I know.  I had a sudden and unexpected radiator replacement on Monday.  Wife had to get a new car just a few months ago, and mine's approaching 110,000 miles.  I'm VERY aware of the potential wear and tear of a 70-mile-a-day round trip.

and they're the only one that has already budgeted keeping all of you guys on and that seems a lot more secure than, "We can only keep one but you're in the lead", which, from experience, might just be something they're telling everyone to increase productivity and competition.

Yeah, it's not the first time I've been told that.

Hell, I've had guys tell me that and be perfectly sincere about it.  The guys at the insurance company I worked for 2008-2010 were doing their damnedest not just to get me hired but to get me transferred to desktop architecture where my skills wouldn't be wasted on opening boxes and counting RAM.  But they couldn't get the budget to hire me on; no budget no hire, bottom line.

B DOES seem like the likeliest one to yield long-term results.  But I'm sure as hell not considering that a guarantee, either.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 27, 2013, 09:48:51 PM
It seems like C shouldn't be discounted as easily as that then. It's close and seems like it may be much more interesting work and give you better options in the long term. Plus the lower pay may not matter if you can use it as a springboard to something better.

On the other side of the coin, those questions make B sound a little more ominous than I'd like now. They're telling you you won't deal with customers, but I'm wondering if that will actually hold up in practice. And doing work on some gimpy in-house template seems like a much less transferable skill. In fact it doesn't sound too much better than desktop support.

C sounds the closest to valuing you for individual talent or ability. The other two sound more like the typical "slot in a warm body" spec. If the salary differential between A and B is 10%, what's the salary differential between B and C? Because I'm really thinking the real choice here is between B and C and not A and B.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on March 27, 2013, 09:56:51 PM
I'm probably one of the least qualified people in the universe to give advice on this subject... but... if I was trying to decide that one for myself, I would ask this: if I do pick A or C, once the time's up and I need to find another job, how much am I likely to regret not having given B a shot?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 27, 2013, 10:25:57 PM
It could either be the most dynamic of the three or the most repetitive.  It involves testing software across various platforms (Windows, Mac, Android), setting up a test bench and automated scripts, that kind of thing.

Since that's more or less what I've been doing for the last three years, I can tell you... it's both.

Test gives you more opportunity to learn new things than development does, oddly enough, but you have to put up with A LOT of day to day repetition as an exchange.  Where development has you learn 1 new thing and apply it ten different ways, test has you learn 2 new things and apply each five times the same way.  You end up knowing more than the developers, but you're 5 times as bored and nobody really believes that you know more than the developers.

(Slightly off-topic anecdote: We were watching some videos during Agile training today and they kept portraying the token tester as this punk who won't stop checking out and fiddling with his cellphone during meetings.  I was a little annoyed about it, but mostly because the guys I've had on my team have all had that problem.  And I don't blame them for it; when you do this job for any amount of time you learn to multitask while paying attention to boring shit, because our entire jobs are pretty much multitasking while paying attention to boring shit.  It's the guys outside the test sphere who don't realize that we're all actually paying perfect attention, but really can't be assed to focus our entire overextended attention spans on your irrelevant bullshit.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 27, 2013, 10:31:28 PM
On the other side of the coin, those questions make B sound a little more ominous than I'd like now. They're telling you you won't deal with customers, but I'm wondering if that will actually hold up in practice. And doing work on some gimpy in-house template seems like a much less transferable skill. In fact it doesn't sound too much better than desktop support.

I'm cynical enough that I'm less worried about whether it IS a transferable skill than whether it'll SOUND like one on a resume.  I'm confident enough in my Web design skills not to be worried about whether I'll learn anything I can use in a future interview.

It's also a company that's well-known for promoting from within -- I'm surprised it's hiring people through agencies at all instead of pulling people in from other departments.

C sounds the closest to valuing you for individual talent or ability.

Well, maybe, aside from the whole "We guarantee we're going to kick you out and slot someone else in eventually" thing.

The other two sound more like the typical "slot in a warm body" spec. If the salary differential between A and B is 10%, what's the salary differential between B and C? Because I'm really thinking the real choice here is between B and C and not A and B.

The salary differential between B and C is negligible.  Most weeks it would probably cover the amount I spend on comics.

I'm probably one of the least qualified people in the universe to give advice on this subject... but... if I was trying to decide that one for myself, I would ask this: if I do pick A or C, once the time's up and I need to find another job, how much am I likely to regret not having given B a shot?

It's a good question but the answer tells you more about me than any of the positions.  I'm not a guy who spends a lot of time on regrets.

My career trajectory would probably have been fundamentally different if I'd taken a job with B 7 years ago instead of going to work for a local ISP and plunging into the most challenging and worst-paying job I've ever had.  The extent of my regret for the Road Not Taken is about what you saw in this thread -- a shrug and a "Well, whaddaya gonna do?"

If I took A and they sent me packing in six months, that would bug me more than if I took C and they sent me packing in a year.  But in either case I'd get back to submitting resumes and do what I had to do to get back on the train.

Worst-case is valuable to consider in risk assessment.  But likely case is important too.  (I suppose in the case of C they're pretty close to the same thing.  I mean, actual worst-case would involve me getting fired or otherwise cut loose before my contract was up, but that's true of every job ever and not a very helpful metric.  And it's also only ever happened once, at the Worst Job Ever.  Which was also located in north Phoenix.  You know, I'm beginning to think it's not just the commute that gives me an aversion to that area.)

Now, if I took B and they cut me loose in two months, THAT would be pretty frustrating.  But again, I'd heave an exasperated sigh and get back to the job search.  I'm used to it at this point.

(There is, of course, also the question of what state unemployment insurance will be in two months from now.  But it's not exactly something I can predict or plan for so I'm not going to waste too much worry on it.)

Since that's more or less what I've been doing for the last three years, I can tell you... it's both.

Test gives you more opportunity to learn new things than development does, oddly enough, but you have to put up with A LOT of day to day repetition as an exchange.  Where development has you learn 1 new thing and apply it ten different ways, test has you learn 2 new things and apply each five times the same way.  You end up knowing more than the developers, but you're 5 times as bored and nobody really believes that you know more than the developers.

Valuable insight; thanks.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 27, 2013, 10:40:50 PM
I wonder if it's worth trying to ask C to up their offer based on A's figure? Would that change the weights on your decision if it did? I mean, with B, it carries a bit more risk because you want them to like you long term if you're hoping for a permanent hire. If C is a fixed contract with a guaranteed dismissal at the end, it's much less awkward to try and wangle a higher rate.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 28, 2013, 07:44:24 AM
I already had them up it to match B.  I don't think they'll raise it again but I don't suppose it would hurt to ask.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 28, 2013, 08:11:52 AM
I already had them up it to match B.  I don't think they'll raise it again but I don't suppose it would hurt to ask.

Not if you're genuinely going to pick a different choice without that incentive and could more seriously consider C with it, no. That's fully above-board, I think.

EDIT: There's the risk that they might see you as someone stringing them along, which could hurt any later offers from them at some future date. But that's really a nine-steps-too-far-ahead kind of thing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 28, 2013, 08:35:36 AM
Just got off the phone with C.  Sounds like a good fit and the place I would most enjoy working.

But they don't think they'll be able to give me an answer by tomorrow.

Strictly speaking, I could accept A and continue to interview for C.  It's not the best idea and if I DID jump ship from A to C after I'd already started I'd probably be burning bridges with the agency that has gotten me 100% of my dayjobs for the past 5 years.  Probably not a good call.

I can't take B and continue to interview for C because they're through the same agency.

I've got until tomorrow to make up my mind.  Barring any sudden feedback from C I think I'm going to have to go B.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 28, 2013, 08:40:07 AM
Maybe talk to the agency for B & C to see if they can give you another day to make a decision? Or does B want you to start Monday? Your first sentence makes it seem like C is possibly a better option, but that's just me.

Agree that burning bridges is a bad idea here.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 28, 2013, 08:42:06 AM
I mean, when you boil it down, there is no longer any salary or commute difference between B and C, so is the decision now essentially not one of job security versus job satisfaction?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 28, 2013, 08:51:02 AM
Maybe talk to the agency for B & C to see if they can give you another day to make a decision? Or does B want you to start Monday?

Yeah, that.  I already asked; they told me B is bringing in the whole team at once and wants to train everybody together starting Monday, so there's no pushing it back.

I mean, when you boil it down, there is no longer any salary or commute difference between B and C, so is the decision now essentially not one of job security versus job satisfaction?

Yes, with both those variables educated guesses at best.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on March 28, 2013, 08:59:15 AM
Well, in spite of any financial difficulties, I've reached a point where I will always take satisfaction over security, but that's my own bias and may not work for you.

My best advice now is to forget it for the rest of the day (if possible), sleep on it, and see how you feel in the morning.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 28, 2013, 11:10:08 AM
Rep who got me A called for an update; I told him I was taking B.  He seemed sanguine about it and said he'd talk to the client.

My primary rep called me back a bit later.  Did one of those guilt-trippy "I'm just trying to understand" and "you know this puts us in a tough spot and we might lose the contract" speeches.  When I was apologetic but said I was sticking with B he started in with the FUD about the turnover there, and I felt that one; I AM concerned about the corporate environment.  I'm hoping that as a Web developer I'll have a better time than the phone bank guys, and I haven't changed my mind, but he HAS got my stomach in knots, second-guessing and doubting the call I've made.  Hate that shit.  But I'll get over it.  I think worst-case is still better than the shit I put up with in June '11.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on March 28, 2013, 03:48:59 PM
Bitches ain't shit.

This message brought to you by nothing ever actually getting done unless I'm actively doing it myself.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 28, 2013, 03:53:23 PM
Your rep sounds like a snake and anything that makes him defensive is probably the right thing to do.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 28, 2013, 04:25:39 PM
He's less used-care-salesmany than the last guy but yeah I don't appreciate being manipulated even if I know I'm being manipulated.

(OTOH yesterday my rep for B brought out a Bad Cop to tell me how concerned he was that I was still holding out for C.  So it's hardly isolated.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on March 28, 2013, 04:38:11 PM
Ugh.  If it were me I'd hold out for C after that, but I don't think you really can.  Suck.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 28, 2013, 09:28:33 PM
I don't see any sense in taking it personally.  It's politics and you gotta deal with it everywhere.  The rep for C would do the same thing given the opportunity.

I would like to give C a shot but I'm not going to risk a sure thing for a not-sure thing.

(Also it occurred to me to E-Mail my rep at the first agency with a list of former coworkers from the same agency who I think would be good for the job at A.  I don't know if any of them are even available, but I figured I may as well put their names out there in case they need it.  Doubt the agency will hit those guys up, but at least I tried.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on March 31, 2013, 07:24:41 PM
Welp, trying to navigate the legalese to decide on health insurance.  Found a plan that I think is pretty comparable to the one I got from the last agency (and am still on via COBRA).  Maybe a little less coverage than I've had for a little less money.  Dropping dental because THAT would be significantly more than what I've been paying for it (like, almost triple) and quite a lot more than it would cost just to get my teeth cleaned twice a year without insurance.

Think I've got everything right.  A little nervous that maybe I've overlooked something but I should be on this plan for less than six months; once my wife gets a teaching job I'll get on her insurance instead.

And I have to send in my first check WITH the paperwork, which I can't afford to do just yet -- will have to wait until after my first paycheck clears.  Still, should be a lot easier after that.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on April 01, 2013, 07:20:21 AM
Go time.  Will let you know how it turns out.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on April 01, 2013, 09:54:13 AM
so far just sitting around waiting for account setup.

could totally bike this...though it's like 6 mi & we'll be hitting 90 degrees by Wed.

if I look left I can see a dkr Batman figure; if I look right there's a drawing of a dalek captioned "hello sweetie".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on April 02, 2013, 08:15:55 AM
Man, can't believe how much worse parking is today; bunch of people must take Mondays off.

Currently sitting in lobby waiting for ID badges.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on April 02, 2013, 10:25:42 AM
Yesterday might have been light because it was the tail end of zombie Jesus weekend.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on April 03, 2013, 07:19:21 AM
Might have made a dent but doesn't begin to explain the magnitude of the difference.

A lot of them must have been morning shift, too, because the parking lot was pretty well emptied-out by 5:30.

Anyway!  Most memorable moment of yesterday was taking my lunch out of the microwave and promptly tipping 75% of it onto the floor.  And having to clean it up with paper towels coming very slowly out of an automatic dispenser.

Fortunately they have $2 lunches there.  They're not bad for two bucks.  When I run out of frozen things I might not buy more, because I think I'd probably be spending more money on food bringing lunch than buying it at this point.

Today we get to actually design a website based on an actual customer ticket.

I think they gave us one where the customer picked a terrible template on purpose, to teach us right off the bat that if the customer requests a bad template you shouldn't listen to them.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on April 05, 2013, 11:49:20 AM
What's this? A sense of accomplishment brought about through solving an interesting implementation problem through clever application of code? Man, I haven't felt THAT in awhile.

Granted it's a bit of a hack, and not how I'd have done it if I weren't constrained by an existing codebase, but still, pretty cool.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on April 05, 2013, 02:12:16 PM
In accordance with the law of averages, this morning's triumph was followed by boss repeatedly accidentally assigning the same site to multiple people simultaneously.

Seriously, 4 times in a row.

I'm amused rather than frustrated. Guess it's OJT for all of us, not just the new guys.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on April 08, 2013, 01:41:38 PM
Boy non-breaking spaces sure are the worst fucking thing ever.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on April 16, 2013, 04:18:28 AM
I have decided my biggest complaint about this place is the woefully inadequate number of bathroom stalls.

Presumably the construction on the other restrooms out in the hall is intended to alleviate this issue. Hopefully they will be done soon.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on April 16, 2013, 04:23:47 AM
I have decided my biggest complaint about this place is the woefully inadequate number of bathroom stalls.
That's as ominous of a complaint as "lack of chairs".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on April 16, 2013, 04:24:48 AM
have you tried rotating the stalls 180 degrees
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on April 16, 2013, 08:57:12 AM
Just overheard a coworker say, "I don't get it. Who'd want a robot that turns into a bug?"

(http://i.imgur.com/gvUuWW8.jpg?1)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on April 16, 2013, 12:24:03 PM
have you tried rotating the stalls 180 degrees

:dudes:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 18, 2013, 06:09:00 AM
I was down in our other office visiting our account cleanup crew guys and saw the following sign on their printer:

(http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8334/8080907006_e8a024c887_z.jpg)

(this is not the exact picture, but one I grabbed on the internet. Presumably this is actually a fairly tired "Office Joke"). 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on April 18, 2013, 08:10:48 AM
Dilbert: a thing in the office.
Dogbert: an observation.
Boss: durrr
Wally: i am incompetent
Dilbert: This is an workplace humors.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on April 18, 2013, 08:20:31 AM
Wasn't wally's thing not that he was incompetent, but he spent three times as much effort getting out of doing work, as it would take to just actually do it?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on April 18, 2013, 08:21:32 AM
Speaking of incompetence: after just telling us we were safe last week, today my bosses announced they're letting go of all contractors at the end of April, including me. So, May 1st, I will be unemployed!

 :whoops:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on April 18, 2013, 08:39:52 AM
April fools!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 18, 2013, 08:43:20 AM
Line from work today "The Island of Doctrine Monroe".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on April 18, 2013, 12:11:01 PM
Speaking of incompetence: after just telling us we were safe last week, today my bosses announced they're letting go of all contractors at the end of April, including me. So, May 1st, I will be unemployed!

 :whoops:

Yeah, that's just about what happened to me in '010.

I made one of my usual remarks to the effect that the axe could fall at any moment; my boss reassured me that they'd need us for the Win7 rollout.

After the Win7 rollout was cancelled, well, it wasn't much of a surprise.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on April 20, 2013, 01:24:38 PM
Job is a bit more under control but I can't help but feel like I need to get some stuff done with the money and benefits it provides before I burn out and quit or get fired.

The job isn't even that bad all things considered. I just know how bad I am at this sort of thing.

But damn am I going to have a bitchin' PC when I'm unemployed again.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Disposable Ninja on April 25, 2013, 07:49:26 AM
Man, guys. Handling knobs all day gives you blisters like you wouldn't believe.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on April 25, 2013, 01:50:47 PM
There's a joke in there somewhere but I just can't seem to rub it out.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Healy on April 25, 2013, 01:54:33 PM
Need someone to give you a hand with that job?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on April 25, 2013, 02:02:14 PM
There's a joke in there somewhere but I just can't seem to rub it out.

That's good, but your knob joke could use a little polish.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on April 26, 2013, 10:20:13 AM
When they told me the company was bringing us beer, I was surprised.

When I discovered it was GOOD beer, I was more surprised still.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 27, 2013, 01:58:41 AM
Today's episode of "The guys at work play internet archaeologist" had them discovering realultimatepower.net
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: François on April 27, 2013, 10:55:27 AM
So you flipped out and killed them, right?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 27, 2013, 11:44:13 AM
Let's just say I fulfilled my purpose.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 28, 2013, 07:35:28 AM
"We're supposed to have camaraderie, you stupid asshole."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on April 30, 2013, 05:59:32 AM
Welp, I am officially unemployed. Time to see if I can get a new job before my savings runs out. White male privilege, don't fail me now!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Disposable Ninja on April 30, 2013, 01:06:39 PM
So, back in November I hurt my right index finger loading some stage equipment onto a truck and had to go to the ER. I smashed it between two massive cases and almost tore off the tip. Three stitches, not that big of a deal.

Here's an exchange I had with another stagehand today:

"How the FUCK did you cut your finger?" (I guess one of the other guys told him)
"Oh, well, I got it caught between a couple of cases."
"Haven't you ever heard of the Super Glue Trick?"
"... no?"
"You use super glue and duct tape to seal up the wound and then you get back to work, and you go to the Hospital after you're done."

In case the subtext wasn't conveyed in the italics, the guy was basically calling me a pussy. I just kind of let it go, but man,

Fuck that guy.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 30, 2013, 01:32:22 PM
Did he say "URRRAHHHHHHHH!" a lot, by any chance?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on April 30, 2013, 02:26:27 PM
DN, just carry around a set of vinyl gloves. Just pop them on when you cut your hand and it will contain all of the blood and allow you to keep working without the burn usually associated with super glue and open wounds, if that's the problem. Or if you think you're going to bleed too much for a glove there's always duct tape.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on April 30, 2013, 02:34:34 PM
Or you can go to the hospital and get stitches so your wounds heal properly, because fuck that guy.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on April 30, 2013, 02:36:02 PM
I'm pretty sure we all know I was being sarcastic to highlight the stupidity of the co-worker, right?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on April 30, 2013, 02:41:10 PM
FWIW, I actually wasn't sure either. I mean, I was like 60% sure you were being sarcastic, but it was a "I... I think he's being sarcastic? Right?" kind of sure.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on April 30, 2013, 02:49:08 PM
I have a nasty scar on my middle finger on my left hand and have permanent nerve damage from having to duct tape my hand together after smashing it with the metal front door on the way out of the house for work at a point in my life when I had to decide between eating and going to the doctor on a work day. Moreover my mom is alive because of medical treatment over the span of 10 years. Trust me when I say that if you can go to the doctor to get medical treatment, I believe you should.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 30, 2013, 03:52:24 PM
You know what I'd do.

(http://brentai.brontoforum.us/images/bruce.jpg)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on April 30, 2013, 04:28:34 PM
He could get like a mini chainsaw attached to the tip of the finger. Then when another co-worker suggest you ignore the extreme pain and disfigurement, he could just gouge him in the eye with it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on April 30, 2013, 04:29:30 PM
"Well, I would have, but it was your mom's favorite finger."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on April 30, 2013, 04:32:47 PM
He could get like a mini chainsaw attached to the tip of the finger. Then when another co-worker suggest you ignore the extreme pain and disfigurement, he could just gouge him in the eye with it.

Hold the line.  Hey, Tim, I just had the best idea for a movie!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Disposable Ninja on May 01, 2013, 11:26:04 AM
More fun today. Nothing too bad, I just went to a warehouse to help prepare for two events: one for the NRA, and one for Glenn Beck.

Living in Texas is magical.

EDIT: oh hey I just saw those very conventions on the national morning news.

mother fucker.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on May 02, 2013, 03:10:54 PM
Interviews! I have one tomorrow at a local private university, and one on Tuesday at a startup that makes educational software. The university job is a contract-to-hire position, and pays a bit more, but the startup job is a straight hire. So we'll see how things go!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on May 10, 2013, 02:52:15 PM
I got the university job! I'll be a project manager in their IT department. I start on the 20th. So...I guess I'll get a couple week's worth of unemployment, right? Is that how it works?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 16, 2013, 10:37:44 AM
I feel like I've reached a point where I'm actually sickened by, rather than proud of, any personal display of actual competence.  There's an omnipresent* voice in my head now screaming "Stop that, you idiot, they'll just make you do more work!"

* At this exact point while typing this out a manager from some other department showed up at my desk and asked me to demo some airside software to a customer despite the fact that I am not a customer rep and do not work on airside software.  I'm just the de facto guy for this now because literally every other person involved would rather sit and bullshit than get it done.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Rico on May 16, 2013, 01:45:06 PM
I met Kevin Smith today, and my general like of his work mixed with my desire to hit him for batman's year-one-urine-retcon turned into a really weird neutrality.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on May 18, 2013, 12:51:23 AM
Good thing you never read the Spider-Man/Black Cat story he wrote. Then the neutrality would have been lost and you definitely would have hit him.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 18, 2013, 03:54:40 AM
Yeah, I was gonna say, the peeing-his-pants thing is annoying but it's not even the worst thing Smith wrote in that miniseries; I'd have to go with the ending for that "honor".

Spider-Man/Black Cat was horrifying.  I mean, legitimately disturbing in the same way that Neonomicon was legitimately disturbing, but without Neonomicon's big ideas and structural cleverness.

And speaking of Alan Moore, Moore himself has pointed out how terrible it was when Kevin Smith brought back Stanley of Stanley and his Monster (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stanley_and_His_Monster) as a child-sacrificing Satanist.  I like to imagine Kevin Smith's reaction on reading that.  "Alan Moore read one of my comics! :8D: ...and says I'm everything that's wrong with comics. :oh:"

I still like Kevin Smith.  He's great at writing banter, and characters who seem like real people (for definitions of "real people" where everybody talks exactly like Kevin Smith).  He's a FANTASTIC raconteur and the true stories he tells are genuine and heartfelt; the one about Jay's years of addiction, in particular, was possibly the most affecting thing I've ever read on a blog.

And I think that speaks a lot to his weaknesses as well as his strengths.  He's a great example of the "write what you know" cliche -- when he's writing about overgrown man-children arguing about Star Wars or comic books, he's hard to beat.  But put him into something action- or story-driven and he flounders.

I'm probably the same way.  I picture the kind of comic book I would write, given the opportunity, and I come up with something that looks a lot like American Splendor (in fact, I've got a script around here somewhere called Thad Goes to the ER which I wrote for my uncle to draw -- maybe we'll get around to that someday).  I like to read about capes and tights, but my storytelling strengths lie in, as I believe Kazz once put it, "some zany anecdote about back home".

It's not that he's INHERENTLY bad at the shared-superhero-universe stuff -- I actually thought his Green Arrow run was great right up until that Stanley and his Monster nonsense.

Also, I've got a copy of Stan Lee's Mutants, Monsters & Marvels sitting on my desk still in its shrink wrap; my wife bought it at the dollar store, mostly as a joke.  And this brings up another of those things about Smith that grates on me: his total, unquestioning belief in Stan Lee's string of "How I Created Everything All By Myself and Am Great" tall tales.  (Hey, that was another Alan Moore reference.)

Exhibit A is, of course, Mallrats.  For another example, check out this article from ComicsAlliance featuring a 1998 Wizard article (http://www.comicsalliance.com/2011/03/03/wizard-magazine-worst-terrible/) where Smith says he never really got why people like Jack Kirby so much.

(And I seldom say this, but scroll down to the comments section, where Jimmy Palmiotti explains that after the interview he convinced Kevin Smith of the error of his ways.)

Anyway.  All this to say, I still like Kevin Smith, and most of his movies, and...about half of his comics?  I'm trying to do the math here.  Four Clerks comics, four Jay and Silent Bob comics, a Bluntman and Chronic OGN that's structured like it's four individual issues, the first ten issues of Green Arrow, about half of Cacophony...?  You know, when I start actually listing them out, he's got a better batting average than I would have thought, though his good comics are definitely tilted toward his creator-owned movie universe stuff.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 18, 2013, 04:52:18 AM
So basically he writes terrible comics but writes good comics about comics.

Something something RPG about RPG players.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Royal☭ on May 18, 2013, 05:03:07 AM
He did also manage to put a great name on one of the universe's lamest villains (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Onomatopoeia_(comics)).
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on May 20, 2013, 12:41:47 PM
Working at a university is a bit weird. This is about what I felt like going to get a coffee at the campus cafe:

(http://i.imgur.com/XtIwk8Q.gif)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on May 20, 2013, 01:43:50 PM
They can smell your fear.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 20, 2013, 04:21:13 PM
Ran into a friend from college at work today.  I knew she worked for the company but didn't realize we worked at the same location.  (Last I talked to her she was at the Scottsdale one.)  So that's one lady from high school and another from college.  Small world.

(And, paradoxically, big building; today's the first time I've ever actually seen either one of them there in the six weeks I've been working there.)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Thad on May 21, 2013, 04:41:24 PM
Smaller yet: the lady I know from high school and the lady I know from college (years apart and in completely different parts of the state) are on the same team.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on May 23, 2013, 05:37:38 AM
So in the very first project I've been assigned to at my new job, the technical lead does not know what unit testing is.

This should be fun.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on May 23, 2013, 06:06:12 AM
Are you sure they're not just using different jargon?
I can't believe anyone could be a tech lead without at least knowing what unit testing is.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on May 23, 2013, 06:10:53 AM
Nope, and when it was explained to them, they didn't seem to understand why we even need to do unit testing. I am as mystified as you are.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on May 23, 2013, 06:19:45 AM
Well, I mean, I guess you don't need to do unit testing, and you can waste a lot of resources on poorly designed and poorly allocated unit tests* but...
Is it a really small project?




*in university a colleague once wrote a bugged unit test that we were using as part of a regression testing suite. Eventually we kept adding features to the point where we got buggy output on a new "unit," which narrowed down where to seek out the problem. I had to go through a half dozen tests to find the broken unit test. In my colleague's defense, I didn't notice how badly they'd fucked up until I'd concluded something must be wrong with the tests and started going through introducing output errors to cause test failures. Probably one of the more instructive wastes of 8 hours I've ever went through.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on May 23, 2013, 06:53:32 AM
It's a project to implement a new, computer-based system for requesting, scheduling, and tracking all facilities maintenance operations for the entire campus, so no, it's not a really small project.

My guess is, he was attempting to push responsibility for all testing off onto the FM folks. I just started this week, but apparently he's been butting heads with them for a while over the structure(or lack thereof) of this project.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 28, 2013, 10:46:28 AM
I got a perfect score on my performance review.

If you knew more about my company's standards you'd know why this is absolutely terrifying.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on May 28, 2013, 11:43:00 AM
Terrifying as in "Great work, Brent. Here's some more responsibility!" or "Goddamn it Brent, you're making the rest of us look bad. The whole department's on notice because of you."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on May 28, 2013, 03:06:24 PM
Terrifying as in "Anybody who sees this is going to question these numbers."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Kayma on May 29, 2013, 11:36:46 AM
"Sleeping your way to the top" kind of questioning?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on May 29, 2013, 01:55:14 PM
Cover your ass.

Actually sleep your way to the top, too.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on May 29, 2013, 10:53:20 PM
I feel like those two things might be mutex in Brent's place of work.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Shinra on May 31, 2013, 07:20:50 AM
So all the sales staff in the multinational pharmaceutical corporation I work for have been getting moved over to ipads for the last couple of months over their old, shitty Windows XP tablets. It's great, except the packet they sent out with all the ipads has numerous typos, errors in process, and outdated processes (that were outdated before the ipads ever shipped) that have necessitated pretty much the entire sales staff calling the helpdesk nonstop to get their ipads to actually work. They are still sending out the out-of-date packet.

The most damning is a guide for one of the apps that suggests you print it out, but has a link you have to click on the third page - if you don't click the link, you have to manually configure the connection, but the server listed in the packet changed between the time the packet was written and the launch of the program, and they didn't bother to update it, so it's literally impossible to connect using the manual instructions.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Lottel on June 05, 2013, 06:57:11 AM
What kind of 14 year old has six abortions and what kind of parents let them keep seeing each other and WHY DOES MY JOB NOW INCLUDE DEALING WITH THIS
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 05, 2013, 03:48:58 PM
You know... we all now that bullshit is everpresent and inescapable, but god help me, ever y day I live I have less and less patience for crap that has nothing to do with my performance or no impact on it.

I'm a good boy, by and large. I show up for all my shifts, I do all my work and then some, I treat all the customers I deal with as much fairness and decency as I can muster, and I never turn down a co worker who asks for help. Will I never find a place where people aren't sweating the trivial policy shit?

That's a rhetorical question of course. The only possible answer is "No".
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on June 05, 2013, 10:35:29 PM
My work has been without a reach-in refrigerator for about two months. Management has been focusing on... which bus tub in our dishwashing area gets the plates and which one gets the glasses.

Now our walk-in cooler is overloaded and starting to not work, because we have to constantly go in and out to get things that really should be kept in a reach-in. This means that we will shortly be entirely without refrigeration.

But God help you if you put a bowl in the glasses tub.

So petty policy crap that ignores issues of actual importance is everywhere, yeah.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Friday on June 06, 2013, 01:59:48 AM
The theory that people rise to their level incompetence is a nice sounding, believable little business idiom, but it's far too unrealistic and optimistic for my taste. You can just say "people" and "incompetence."
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 06, 2013, 02:39:21 AM
My biggest problem is that I eventually start calling that shit out and then I get fired. I mean, I'm in no danger of being fired here yet, unless I did something catastrophic (this is one of those places where the regular process would take six months to a year and be REALLY OBVIOUS... sometimes bureaucracy works both ways), but still.

My manager leaves me alone other than to carp about something trivial once a week, which is a significant upgrade over management I've had elsewhere, but he's still pretty damned useless.

I dunno, I've been hating this place a lot more since a couple weeks ago, when I got shot down hard after I took on extra work that we were once encouraged to do, which is also much more interesting, and whose administrators were very happy to have help on. Nope. Our bullshit mop-and-bucket tasks have instead grown to the point where they consume everything. The managers bitch about their bonuses being affected, so we get the shovels.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on June 06, 2013, 05:56:10 AM
Management has been focusing on... which bus tub in our dishwashing area gets the plates and which one gets the glasses.
There are three ways to deal with bullshit like this:

If owners / whoever is directly monetarily impacted know your name at all you can go directly to them with pleas for reason or alternate ideas where the case may be.

If they don't know you're a good worker or are still confused and think the idiots slowing things down are good at what they do, you wait it out and let stuff go wrong until you're in a position to be able to step up to the plate.

If the owners are the ones making the decisions You take this opportunity to find another job before that place closes down.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on June 18, 2013, 06:25:19 AM
I'm messing around at work and no one can stop me
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: MarsDragon on June 19, 2013, 12:11:12 PM
I've been doing nothing but mess around at work for months now and no one's bothered to stop me because there's no work to do.

I'm openly playing FFV on my PSP all day now. No one gives a shit.

Hopefully next week we'll have requirements for the next release! ...the next release that is tiny because of budget concerns. That is going out in October.

aggghhhhh
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on June 19, 2013, 04:50:24 PM
Did you hear someone say spearhead a pet project that will put your name on the map?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on June 21, 2013, 02:24:35 PM
So, I've mentioned that I work weekends before and that I do 10 hour shifts. Which is okay! I quite like my schedule, because I get 3 days off a week.

Anyway, if the IT department is doing heavy maintenance, they will take the whole system offline. Out of necessity, they will do this Sunday morning. So while we normally start at 8 or 10 on Sunday, we're not allowed to come in until noon when there's going to be a system outage. We also have to do make-up time for the lost hours Sunday, which means coming in on a day off or shuffling hours around to other days.

The ridiculous thing is that we've had unscheduled scheduled system outages for all but five weekends so far this year. And while they sometimes give people two or three days notice, sometimes they send out the notification on Friday - at like 4pm. I mean, I default to assuming it'll happen now.

Having no life and living close to work, the constant wild last-minute schedule changes don't affect me much. And I just tack the extra time on the preceding Saturday and do a 12-hour shift, which is also not really a huge deal for me. But I can't imagine it doesn't drive everybody else insane. If this is happening literally every Sunday for months on end, can you not just schedule it officially instead of playing up at being idiots?   
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 27, 2013, 11:32:19 AM
Beyond annoying, it's actually baffling that I have to constantly remind, request, threaten, and beg the developers to manage their version numbers.  That crap is for them more than anyone.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on June 27, 2013, 02:55:57 PM
I'm sick, for the second time in two weeks. I think this one is more due to very poor choice of dinner venue last night rather than catching another bug off the kids from work, but...

stop pooping (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7hcA8wFKhYY#ws)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on June 28, 2013, 04:23:37 AM
This Friday is Hawaiian shirt day.

So I'm wearing a Hawaiian shirt.

And jeans.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on June 28, 2013, 04:41:19 AM
But did you ask yourself, "Is this good for the company?"
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on July 29, 2013, 04:21:30 AM
Guess who's going to be looking for work at the end of the week!

 :whoops:

On the plus side, I already have a couple of leads, and I don't think I would have lasted much longer at this place anyway. To put it in diplomatic terms, I don't think it was a good fit.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on July 29, 2013, 01:00:25 PM
fuuuuucckk
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on July 29, 2013, 01:47:18 PM
Just to give an example of the kind of workplace it was: I was informed last Thursday evening by the contracting agency that I would be let go this coming Friday. Today, two full work days later, and my boss at the place of employment itself hasn't said a single word to me about it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on July 29, 2013, 02:53:56 PM
Classy!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ted Belmont on July 30, 2013, 01:18:23 AM
Yep, it's basically the professional equivalent of a text message breakup.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on July 30, 2013, 05:27:34 AM
In similar news, I got four interviews into the job of my dreams, then nothing for a week. Good god did I want this.

C'est la vie~
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 05, 2013, 05:46:54 AM
Today is my first day as a salaried employee.  Thing is, the HR system fucked up and didn't exactly replace my hourly wage with my salary...

I really, really wish I was smooth enough to just get away with this.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on August 05, 2013, 06:58:15 AM
Ah, don't sweat it. They figure that shit out eventually and claw it all back if you say nothing.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on August 05, 2013, 07:19:22 AM
That's what I was wishing I was smooth enough to avoid, yes.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on August 05, 2013, 07:50:11 AM
It's nice to know someone recognizes that you do the work of one and a half people.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Disposable Ninja on August 31, 2013, 03:58:09 AM
I just got a miserable temporary job at a Macy Warehouse. I haven't started, yet, but I did go through orientation. My favorite part was the propaganda film which they might as well have called "Union Madness", and Sweet Jesus Titty-Fucking Christ was it amazing. "Remember: if a co-worker attempts to pressure you into joining a Union, you can just say no". Said co-worker, by the way, was portrayed by a fat, sleaze-ball looking pedophile of an old man while the innocent Macy's warehouse workers he was trying to exploit were all young and attractive good Christians.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on August 31, 2013, 04:58:39 AM
It doesn't surprise me that large corporations attempt to portray unions as mustache-twirling cartoon villains, no.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Caithness on August 31, 2013, 11:57:47 AM
That kind of sounds like it would backfire in a lot of cases.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on September 20, 2013, 08:47:10 AM
Holy hell this job market  s  u  c  k  s  right about now. Can't even find contract work.

on the plus side, it's really freed up time for me to feel like a useless piece of shit so that's pretty cool
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on September 22, 2013, 03:58:35 PM
bootstraps

pull up by them

(just kidding)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mothra on September 22, 2013, 04:22:58 PM
I am... definitely considering a lot of shit, career-wise, I'd never have considered before.

The education industry is not exactly a wonderland of gumdrops and lollipops right now, I am starting to notice.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 24, 2013, 05:03:16 AM
For those of you who know the story, I just set http://brentai.brontoforum.us/images/silenthill_dog.png (http://brentai.brontoforum.us/images/silenthill_dog.png) as my lock screen.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Defenestration on September 24, 2013, 06:22:00 AM
<Me> We can update your PS3 and I should be able to walk you through it. The PC you're at... do you use Windows?
<Consumer> I don't have Windows.
<Me> So it's a Mac?
<Consumer> What? No.
<Me> ...You're using a Linux PC?
<Consumer> A what?
<Me> What do you use then?
<Consumer> What are you even talking about?
<Me> ...When you said that you don't have windows, explain what you mean.
<Consumer> This room only has 2 doors.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on September 24, 2013, 09:29:43 AM
Wocka wocka wocka!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on September 24, 2013, 09:36:40 AM
After working tech support for three years ("Now when you say web browser, do you mean my mouse?") I'm not surprised that those people exist.

I'm a little surprised that they still exist, but whaddyagonnado
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Malikial on September 24, 2013, 10:56:13 AM
I know 19 year olds who work at the theatre who call google 'the internet' and don't know how to get to facebook without it.


ACTUALLY, on this topic, the only other technically capable person who works there(Other than James) is a 33 year old(older than me). I have frequently been asked, by the kids, how to 'download more ram' or how to 'get free youtubes'. So....
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 24, 2013, 12:16:00 PM
It always cracks me up to hear older people jealously talk about how much more tech savvy younger people are.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 24, 2013, 01:26:37 PM
Sometimes these arcs are longer, sometimes they're shorter. I mean, look how long it took us to reach a point where absolutely nobody knows how to work on cars at all.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on September 24, 2013, 01:34:52 PM
As a computer engineer I worry sometimes that stuff like circuit logic and assembly and even basic C are becoming increasingly extracurricular for new students, but then I realize that that just means that exactly as many people know that stuff as needs to.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Malikial on September 24, 2013, 01:52:29 PM
I know how to work on cars but it's literally so annoying that I will pay someone 50 bucks to change my oil and stuff instead of do it myself.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Joxam on September 24, 2013, 02:05:36 PM
Especially now that car companies are making it a requirement that you see a mechanic for what used to be trivial stuff. The battery on a Chrysler Seabring is behind the front driver's side wheel well, almost all minivans need the engine mount loosened in order to move the engine enough to reach the spark plugs, I haven't seen a full size spare since before I was old enough to lift one, etc.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on September 24, 2013, 03:04:28 PM
That stuff drives me nuts. I hate cars with no user-serviceable bits. But then, I like working on engines. I'm not very GOOD at it (I'm tolerable), but I do like it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 03, 2013, 02:07:45 AM
Multiple people are currently discussing how awesome Gaston is.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Silversong on October 11, 2013, 04:22:34 AM
A toss-up between here and Good Times. I have officially been offered a position at University of Michigan's Ford School of Public Policy. It sounds like an awesome position and all the people seem great. It pays more than I currently get but rent is also way more expensive in Ann Arbor so it should balance. Great benefits and lots of paid time off.
 :perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Ziiro on October 11, 2013, 11:34:56 AM
I quit my job about a month back. Been unemployed since then.

Got a call my old employer needs help for a few months. I start next week.

I also got all the paperworker/testing done to start my self employment job as of next week.

From 0 to 60 in one week. Potentially. I might just say fuck it on the self employment, but the money would be nice? At the cost of my sanity.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 11, 2013, 02:45:19 PM
It's worth trying to see if you can do it. You never know when the gainful employment will cut out again. You can always drop the less successful one if it's too much.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Silversong on October 28, 2013, 11:04:18 AM
Had my first day working at the University of Michigan today! First 3.5 hours was orientation-covering how cool it is that I work for the university, benefits, parking (don't), getting my picture ID, etc. The second half of the day was helping out with an event; Cecilia Muñoz speaking about immigration policy. It was an interesting and hectic day, and at the end of it there were tiny pies!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on October 30, 2013, 10:45:06 AM
Saw a senior manager or other exec today, a younger dude, with a minecraft tie.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on November 10, 2013, 11:31:29 PM
(https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/35466408/2013-11-06%2009.39.12.jpg)

(https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/35466408/2013-11-08%2015.22.19.jpg)

I have mixed feelings about what I'll be selling at my new job.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Zaratustra on November 11, 2013, 03:45:55 AM
http://www.topatoco.com/merchant.mvc?Screen=PROD&Store_Code=TO&Product_Code=WIGU-REFERENCES&Category_Code=WELCOME (http://www.topatoco.com/merchant.mvc?Screen=PROD&Store_Code=TO&Product_Code=WIGU-REFERENCES&Category_Code=WELCOME)
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: DeusExMatilda on November 19, 2013, 06:41:56 AM
Last week I got a call offering me a job, and despite being unemployed, I turned it down because it paid just over half the salary of the other jobs I was interviewing for. Damn company harassed me all weekend, called me seven different times trying to hire me, until I told them to never contact me again.

[spoiler]I didn't get the other jobs.[/spoiler] :perfect:
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 19, 2013, 07:19:40 AM
In a situation like that, it's best to straight up state that you are currently interviewing for multiple openings elsewhere all of which pay nearly double. Tell them you're only interested if they can match.

Or maybe you did do that and they said no and kept bugging you anyway? In which case, fuck those guys.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: DeusExMatilda on November 19, 2013, 07:55:25 AM
Yeah, I did tell them I had better offers when I rejected, so this is on them. It mostly just stings to still be unemployed after having straight up turned down a job, and makes me irrationally worried I made the wrong decision.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on November 19, 2013, 08:16:43 AM
It's small consolation, but you made the best move you could with the information available to you.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Brentai on November 19, 2013, 08:36:18 AM
You don't want to work for a company that treats you like dirt before you're even on payroll.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 19, 2013, 08:42:05 AM
Yeah, it doesn't sound like you lost out on much of anything.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: R^2 on November 19, 2013, 11:09:04 AM
$100 a week is still more than $0 a week. So it'd have been a shitty job for a scummy company for low pay, but it's hard to say that that's worse than unemployment.

Condolences.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on November 19, 2013, 11:48:14 AM
One of the owners said I looked tired this morning. I apologized and told him I had stayed up later than I normally would the night before.

Now both owners think I was out 'til morning getting drunk.

I meant I had stayed up until midnight playing Final Fantasy.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on November 20, 2013, 11:07:54 PM
So, how would you like a job that you drove an hour and a half one way to be treated like shit and be expected to be thankful you have a job, and if you don't like it there's the door, because there's 30 other assholes gunning for your job, and will backstab you for it.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 27, 2013, 05:44:32 PM
I had yesterday off.

Of course that was the day that the Stanley Cup was at work to celebrate the fact that our company had essentially bought Hockey.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on November 28, 2013, 06:50:49 AM
I just got a work call from a guy at another company out in Calgary. He sounded familiar.

Turned out to be a guy I lived with for 2 years a decade ago when I was in college after university.

That was seriously weird. But cool!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Beat Bandit on November 30, 2013, 03:49:25 AM
I just realized yesterday that my store isn't 'Eureka' like the exclamation, but 'Eureeka' like the castle owner. I don't think anyone else has caught on yet.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: peabody on December 13, 2013, 07:32:04 AM
Are you pronouncing those words differently, or is the store's name a reference?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: on December 13, 2013, 08:24:30 AM
What about Eh Ooh Wreck Ah?
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: TA on December 13, 2013, 08:26:19 AM
I assume it has to be the spelling thing.  Eureka only has one pronunciation in everything.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Büge on December 13, 2013, 10:02:47 AM
Ey, paesano! You ate-a too much-a garlic and now eureka!
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Mongrel on January 12, 2014, 09:39:35 AM
Oh boy, I sure like not being able to do anything all day for a ten-hour shift.

Is this not 2014? I mean, I work for a fucking telecom company, nominally a tech company, even. You'd think having a single server go down wouldn't mean that all my profile info gets fried such that I can't log in to anything. Ever hear of redundancy, you cheap assholes?

I mean, sure I goof off some anyway and I should probably just shut up and watch YouTube and take my free day, but we're behind and I have shit to get done.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on January 14, 2014, 02:48:41 AM
Yep, still hating my job.

Hour commute one-way, arbitrary and flippant management, homophobia, sexism, racism, etc. 

And I can't quit because I cannot find another job. 
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: Classic on January 14, 2014, 03:26:59 AM
Did you leave the USAF* network or are you still in that?



*Derp, this acronym is meant to be read as US Armed Forces, not US Air Force. Derp derp.
EDIT: Above derp.
Title: Re: Your Job: The Movie
Post by: McDohl on January 14, 2014, 03:28:22 AM
I was in the Navy.  But I dunno, I'm just sick of dealing with the army mentality.