Brontoforumus Archive

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

News:


This board has been fossilized.
You are reading an archive of Brontoforumus, a.k.a. The Worst Forums Ever, from 2008 to early 2014.  Registration and posting (for most members) has been disabled here to discourage spambots from taking over.  Old members can still log in to view boards, PMs, etc.

The new message board is at http://brontoforum.us.

Poll

Commands:

“Yesssss.”
- 7 (43.8%)
“N-no.”
- 3 (18.8%)
"..."
- 1 (6.3%)
"Bonk!"
- 5 (31.3%)

Total Members Voted: 16

Voting closed: April 08, 2009, 05:18:41 PM


Author Topic: The Mayor - Chapter 11 - Last Smoke  (Read 2234 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

The Mayor

  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: 0
  • Posts: 60
    • View Profile
    • The Mayor
The Mayor - Chapter 11 - Last Smoke
« on: April 06, 2009, 05:18:06 PM »



http://www.votemayor.com/?p=226

Elected Command: Inform Sister Mister of a few details.

“You’ve got that incredulatin’ look on your face, and I haven’t even answered ya question yet.” snickers Sammy. “Hey, don’t I look sharp in this new suit?”

“A clown costume would be mor’ dignified.” snorts Sister Mister, as Sammy playfully models. “Why’d Moorehead have’ta crash my joint?”

“Gonzo ain’t ‘round no more. Boss Craven is digging for the full deal, and since I saw The Uncle this mornin’, he came to me first.” explains Sammy.

“You met Uncle Gonzo? Fancy critter you ‘re.” says Sister Mister.

“Yeah, hello, new family member and all here. Anywho, old man Gonzo looked jus’ as fat ‘n jolly as ever. Dunno what went down after I’d left.” says Sammy, slumping back down onto his favorite bar stool.

“Whatev’.” incredulously whispers Sister Mister. “Be a dear and check out ‘dat racket in ‘da kitchen while I’s make ‘dis joint presentable like. Ratigators probably crawl’d up from ‘dat sewer drain again.”

Grunting, Sammy extinguishes his next to last cigarette, now all but an ashy stub. Lifting his small frame off the stool, his second-hand Mafioso dress shoes thud down onto the floor. Hunching over, he picks up the dinged bat with one hand, and crams the other into his jacket pocket, retrieving yet another cigarette. His last cigarette, to be precise. Twiddling the rolling paper between his fingers, the filter slips into his lips.

The ratty kitchen doors swing wide open from the strike of Sammy’s second-hand Mafioso dress shoes.

Darkness. The light switch to the cramped hallway passing itself off as a makeshift kitchen doesn’t respond. Sammy squints.

The boarded up fire exit in the back has been broken open, as the chilly night wind howls in from the alleyway behind Bar Nun. Sammy drags himself forward, shakily lighting his last cigarette. His second-hand Mafioso dress shoes bang into a soft lump.

Before he can exhale his first puff, a large hand grips his throat. The last cigarette is flicked away from his quivering lips, as he chokes, nearly losing his grip on the dinged bat.

The tip of the last cigarette glows bright, as the owner of the large hand inhales deeply. Smoke blows into Sammy’s alarmed face.

“Tell me, citizen… Are you registered to vote?” growls the smoker.

Commands:

   1. “Yesssss.”
   2. “N-no.”
   3. “…”
   4. “Bonk!”

Voting ends in 48 hours.
Logged

Defenestration

  • The Sixth Window
  • Tested
  • Karma: 20
  • Posts: 1867
    • View Profile
Re: The Mayor - Chapter 11 - Last Smoke
« Reply #1 on: April 06, 2009, 06:35:44 PM »

Even if it is the Mayor, he took your last damn Cigarette! Bonk imo
Logged
Una salus victis nullam sperare salutem

Brentai

  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DnXYVlPgX_o
  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: -65281
  • Posts: 17524
    • View Profile
Re: The Mayor - Chapter 11 - Last Smoke
« Reply #2 on: April 06, 2009, 08:28:14 PM »

4, because that would be hilarious.
Logged

SCD

  • Tested
  • Karma: 18
  • Posts: 1856
    • View Profile
Re: The Mayor - Chapter 11 - Last Smoke
« Reply #3 on: April 06, 2009, 08:55:13 PM »

I concur!
Logged

Arc

  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: 0
  • Posts: 3703
    • View Profile
Re: The Mayor - Chapter 11 - Last Smoke
« Reply #4 on: April 06, 2009, 09:00:17 PM »

And I'll look down, and whisper 'Bonk.'
Logged

MadMAxJr

  • Tested
  • Karma: 5
  • Posts: 2339
    • View Profile
    • RPG Q&A
Re: The Mayor - Chapter 11 - Last Smoke
« Reply #5 on: April 07, 2009, 09:43:09 AM »

Vote YES for Mayor!
Logged
"The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt." - Bertrand Russell

Got questions about RPGs?

Arc

  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: 0
  • Posts: 3703
    • View Profile
Re: The Mayor - Chapter 11 - Last Smoke
« Reply #6 on: April 07, 2009, 09:56:07 AM »

This vote is becoming close.

We may have to appeal it to the Supreme Burrito Court.
Logged

Lady Duke

  • Shiny Ranger
  • Tested
  • Karma: 3
  • Posts: 2339
    • View Profile
Re: The Mayor - Chapter 11 - Last Smoke
« Reply #7 on: April 07, 2009, 12:15:23 PM »

Guys, bonk is an absurd answer that will probably not help further the situation in a favorable way.
Logged

Brentai

  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DnXYVlPgX_o
  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: -65281
  • Posts: 17524
    • View Profile
Re: The Mayor - Chapter 11 - Last Smoke
« Reply #8 on: April 07, 2009, 12:36:10 PM »

That is a very compelling argument.

I am now satisfied with my decision to Bonk.
Logged

Defenestration

  • The Sixth Window
  • Tested
  • Karma: 20
  • Posts: 1867
    • View Profile
Re: The Mayor - Chapter 11 - Last Smoke
« Reply #9 on: April 07, 2009, 02:34:28 PM »

Guys, bonk is an absurd answer that will probably not help further the situation in a favorable way.
That's the point! He took my LAST GODDAMN CIGARRETTE! Boot to the head!
Logged
Una salus victis nullam sperare salutem

Kayma

  • kodePunc Team
  • Tested
  • *
  • Karma: 31
  • Posts: 2692
    • View Profile
    • http://twitter.com/kayma
Re: The Mayor - Chapter 11 - Last Smoke
« Reply #10 on: April 08, 2009, 08:48:17 AM »

Bonk! But only because there's no option for Grok!, or Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-PTANG. Zoom-Boing. Z'nourrwringmm!
Logged

Arc

  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: 0
  • Posts: 3703
    • View Profile
Re: The Mayor - Chapter 11 - Last Smoke
« Reply #11 on: April 08, 2009, 08:58:19 AM »

Apologies for the lack of audio, but I've decided to withhold the file in this particular case until voting is finished.
Logged

Defenestration

  • The Sixth Window
  • Tested
  • Karma: 20
  • Posts: 1867
    • View Profile
Re: The Mayor - Chapter 11 - Last Smoke
« Reply #12 on: April 08, 2009, 04:39:58 PM »

Another thought. This isn't the Mayor. This is a povertoid having complete control of the Mayor's mind. And that means a vagrant just walked into your kitchen and busted open your door.

Clearly, the only recourse is to beat the snot out of him.
Logged
Una salus victis nullam sperare salutem

The Mayor

  • Admin
  • Tested
  • Karma: 0
  • Posts: 60
    • View Profile
    • The Mayor
Re: The Mayor - Chapter 11 - Last Smoke
« Reply #13 on: April 08, 2009, 05:25:29 PM »

Elected Command: “Yesssss.”
Logged