Apparently international postage is dirt cheap up in Canadia because Buge decided to send me a freaking set of weights. I actually started to wonder if there actually
was a live loli in there, and whether or not I shouldn't have kept it in my trunk all day.
Fuck yes I can't wait for like twelve more of these seriously.
'Da Büge spared no expense with the packing material. The best part is that many of these bags still had receipts in them. Did you know that 'Da Büge really likes blackberries? It's apparently true!
What I haven't mentioned yet is that I kind of coyly put "PORN OK!!!" in my wishlist this year, in response to the deluge of people who apparently can't handle a couple dicks. Once I saw that 'Da Büge was gonna be my match this year, well... I think we can all see the writing on the bathroom stall here.
What's the "right" amount of porn? I tried to gauge it from the handy chart that 'Da Büge provided me.
Welp, time to dig in. I'm sure nothing at all in here will OH HELL WHAT
That's twice in a row that somebody's sent me some sort of animal-fuck thing to hang on my wall. Are you guys trying to tell me something about my love of self-insulating anthrosnatch?
Anyway, I'm in an ironic mood for decorating this year, and my wishlist did specifically say I needed shit to put on my wall, so...
GOOD GOD HOW DOES THAT CREATURE OVER THERE STAY WARM WITHOUT ITS COVERINGS ON?
Next comes the miscellanea. Apologies for the conksuckiness of the early pics since I take photos about twice a year and it took me a while to figure out my phone's camera (a while as in "I never really did.")
* A One Piece video game. What I know about One Piece you can write on the back of a cookie fortune, so this ought to be interesting.
* A photo frame. I don't think anything here "fits" the frame so I guess it's a spare that 'Da Büge had hanging around. Actually I got really a ton of photo frames this year, which I guess is fine.
* A tasteful knitted thingamadecoration.
* A pack of anime playing cards, which is another odd thing I keep getting from you people. This one is some Miyazaki thing I must have missed.
* A beaded bracelet that's supposedly meant to help tally your strokes in golf. Nice!
* The world's tiniest labyrinth game.
* A random Hot Wheel. Or maybe a Micro Machine. It's a car.
* A foldable fan from Niagara. More useful and appreciated than you may think!
* A very small jigsaw puzzle. I cannot ascertain at this time whether it has tits on it or fits in a photo frame.
* Little pad things. It's probably obvious to everybody what they really are but all I can think of is that they're just impractically small mouse pads. All I care about is that one of them has Miku on it.
Next, we have a wallet, with a very tasteful representation of
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Fuck you too, you rocket-whoring asshole.
Here we have Skrunk*, chilling out in the camera's insane LED flash next to his pile of skulls. Skrunk*'s backstory is that he lost the use of his fists due to an accidental wizard, and therefore has to tape his weapons to his wrists to continue being a barbarian. Not shown: a double-voulge thing that I assume belongs to Skrunk*. I don't know where he's supposed to have taped it, but I have some ideas.
* Copyright pending.
What... what is this guy? What is his
deal? He looks like a cross between Justice and Mr. Penis Monster. I'm going to call him Mr. Justice Penis, and no you can't correct me away from that.
Now we start getting into the promised stuff. First, way more Tarot than a healthy boy should have.
What you can't tell without actually looking at these things is that these volumes are
thick. Jim Balent is... productive. And it's kind of hard to make any sort of reference to these books without sounding like you're talking about his wank.
I don't know exactly what's in Forbidden X Angel but I bet I could get it in three guesses.
OH GOD DAMN IT.
I THOUGHT I HAD FINALLY GOTTEN RID OF THOSE HOW TO DRAW MANGA BOOKS.
BUT NOW THEY'RE BACK WITH A VENGEANCE AND A LEATHER THONG.
This is cool. It's still a book full of naked girl drawings, but it's one of those books full of naked girl drawings you can leave on your coffee table and make people think you're a man of refinement who respects the female form and doesn't just want to stuff it full of dongs until jizm starts spraying out of every orifice. Suckers.
Gotta say, so far this has all been surprisingly tasteful and not out and out hent...
Ah! Here we go.
I guess at age 27 I can finally say I legally own both a real hentai manga AND a video, for better or for worse. G-Taste isn't really my flavor of porn (see above re: UNTIL FUCKING CANDY COMES OUT), but at the very least I can say that someone sent me real actual cartoon porn for Christmas. And that's awesome.
God bless us, every one!
Or at least forgive us.
Author
Topic: WORST LOOT '10 (Pic Heavy/NSFW) (Read 1128 times)