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Author Topic: Your Job: The Movie  (Read 177982 times)

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TA

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Re: Your Job: The Movie
« Reply #1680 on: July 02, 2011, 08:30:34 PM »

Ooh.  Details?
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Do you understand how terrifying the words “vibrating strap on” are for an asexual? That’s like saying “the holocaust” to a Jew.

François

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Re: Your Job: The Movie
« Reply #1681 on: July 02, 2011, 09:47:54 PM »

Not for free anymore, TA.
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Lottel

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Re: Your Job: The Movie
« Reply #1682 on: July 03, 2011, 12:41:07 AM »

You are obviously going to go for it, right?
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Ziiro

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Re: Your Job: The Movie
« Reply #1683 on: July 13, 2011, 07:29:38 AM »

So I know we have a lot of people looking for jobs, and maybe some looking for something better. I figure I'd share this:

http://www.reddit.com/r/forhire/

It's a decent number of tech jobs, with a mix of other things.
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Büge

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Re: Your Job: The Movie
« Reply #1684 on: July 14, 2011, 08:36:44 PM »

I get some real choice customers at my store. I think I've talked about the guy in the motor wheelchair with lobotomy scars and Marty Feldman eyes who always begs for cookies before.

Today, I'm going to talk about Skeezix.

I dunno if that's his real name and frankly, the less I know about Skeezix the better. He's one of the scummiest people I've ever had to deal with. I know you shouldn't judge people and stuff, but man, this guy. First of all is his appearance. He's always, always, wearing a hooded sweater, partly zipped up, without a shirt underneath. And it's always the same goddamn hoodie. I have this horrible feeling that it's the only shirt he wears, and he just doesn't bother while he's at home. I presume he doesn't have a job, because he just oozes casual apathy. His hair is greasy-looking and long. I'd say the person he resembles most would be The Jesus from The Big Lebowski, but without the fashion sense.

Second is the smell. Every time, every goddamn time he comes in, he stinks to high heaven, like he schedules his showers weekly. I'm not kidding when I say I hold my breath whenever he approaches. I bet he'd qualify as ascetic if it wasn't for the crap he eats. Which leads me to point three.

Skeezix always getting the same crap every time he comes in. Pizza, pies, cake. Oh, and it's not just any food. See, at my store, we mark down anything that expires the next day to 50%. He always arrives in the evening and lurks around the bakery and deli, just waiting for us to mark down something. He used to bother us ahead of time to mark stuff down, but that was before I knew that our policy was not to do that (otherwise we'd have everybody begging us to mark down stuff). One the ladies in deli actually caught Skeezix trying to switch markdown tags to get something for even cheaper.

The guy's a goddamn walking stereotype: Skeezix would be the shifty-eyed scumbag henchman who got his comeuppance at the end of the movie.
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McDohl

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Re: Your Job: The Movie
« Reply #1685 on: July 15, 2011, 09:02:28 AM »

Hey, dudes!  Sorry I dropped off the face of the planet for a while.  Didn't have the cable set up in my new apartment, but I'm going now!
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Büge

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Re: Your Job: The Movie
« Reply #1686 on: July 15, 2011, 09:11:31 AM »

Good! Get over to Talking Time so we can continue our EDH game!
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McDohl

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Re: Your Job: The Movie
« Reply #1687 on: July 15, 2011, 10:20:27 AM »

You're a slowpoke, Slowpoke!  That was one of the first things I did! >:(
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R^2

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Re: Your Job: The Movie
« Reply #1688 on: July 19, 2011, 06:25:34 PM »

So my three-day-a-week class this quarter is A la Carte and Dining Room Service, or As Close To Working In An Actual Restaurant As We Can Make It.

Tonight was our first night for actual people-come-in-and-dine service. I worked the salad and soup station.

I'm so awesome at it I was training other people to do it half an hour in.

So uh

why am I unemployed again? ::(:
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Thad

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Re: Your Job: The Movie
« Reply #1689 on: July 19, 2011, 08:34:44 PM »

Welp, Windows 7 deployment time.

They brought on a team of 3 temps to install the computers overnight, and me to deal with the users the next morning.

2 of the 3 people on the night shift got fired after their first night.
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Dooly

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Re: Your Job: The Movie
« Reply #1690 on: July 20, 2011, 12:44:48 AM »

For what, exactly?
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Classic

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Re: Your Job: The Movie
« Reply #1691 on: July 20, 2011, 09:01:59 AM »

Wild office sexnannigans?
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Thad

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Re: Your Job: The Movie
« Reply #1692 on: July 20, 2011, 04:26:22 PM »

I don't know that they were fucking, but whatever the hell they were doing, they weren't setting up properly-configured Windows 7 workstations.

Today was much the hell better; not only did they keep the one competent person on the team, they put her in charge.

Which is good news because as of tomorrow I'm pretty much on my own as far as finalizing the installs; the guy I've been working with for the past few weeks is going on leave.
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Thad

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Re: Your Job: The Movie
« Reply #1693 on: July 21, 2011, 11:18:35 AM »

This morning I was troubleshooting a computer.  The user mentioned that another tech had already run something on it.

I said, "Was it about a fifteen-minute filecopy?"

She responded, "I'm an underwriter; I don't really understand the IT stuff."

Guys, I do not know how to dumb down "fifteen-minute filecopy" any further.
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Mongrel

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Re: Your Job: The Movie
« Reply #1694 on: July 21, 2011, 11:21:09 AM »

"Did they spend about fifteen minutes copying a file?"
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Mongrel

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Re: Your Job: The Movie
« Reply #1695 on: July 21, 2011, 11:24:42 AM »

Oh man, that reminds me. Some nob at work issued a decree last month that the customer service grunts can't call customers "Angry" or "Irate" or whatever in their case notes anymore. Instead, the word they must use is "Passionate" (our dept is under no such decree).

Yep.

So now we see notes on accounts like "Explained all charges on customer's bill. Customer then became very passionate." or "Customer is extremely passionate and will not wait much longer for the tech to arrive on site."
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Brentai

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Re: Your Job: The Movie
« Reply #1696 on: July 21, 2011, 11:48:22 AM »

This is the plot of most solo porn movies.
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Friday

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Re: Your Job: The Movie
« Reply #1697 on: July 21, 2011, 12:38:13 PM »

Friday was becoming very passionate because Brentai kept ripping off her clothes.
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Thad

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Re: Your Job: The Movie
« Reply #1698 on: July 21, 2011, 01:11:37 PM »

"Did they spend about fifteen minutes copying a file?"

Well yes, that's pretty much how I repeated it.  But that is not additional dumbing-down; it is the exact same words put in a slightly different order.

Thing is that this wasn't somebody in her fifties; she's probably younger than I am.  (This leads me to wonder if perhaps a day will come when users stop suggesting that they don't know as much about computers as I do because they're so old and start suggesting that they don't know as much about computers as I do because they're so young.  Alternately, I could be the out-of-touch oldster who doesn't know how to operate a smartphone.  Or both, assuming we live in a world that still has both desktop computers and smartphones a few decades down the line.)
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R^2

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Re: Your Job: The Movie
« Reply #1699 on: July 22, 2011, 05:47:47 AM »

This isn't a job interview, it's an "information session". I'm one of two dozen people corraled into a hotel conference room waiting for whatever an "information session" is to start. From the general ambiance I feel like selling me timeshares might factor in somewhere.
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