Brontoforumus Archive

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

News:


This board has been fossilized.
You are reading an archive of Brontoforumus, a.k.a. The Worst Forums Ever, from 2008 to early 2014.  Registration and posting (for most members) has been disabled here to discourage spambots from taking over.  Old members can still log in to view boards, PMs, etc.

The new message board is at http://brontoforum.us.

Author Topic: Shit Days  (Read 227717 times)

0 Members and 6 Guests are viewing this topic.

Malikial

  • Tested
  • Karma: -65517
  • Posts: 773
    • View Profile
Re: Shit Days
« Reply #2540 on: November 16, 2011, 03:24:34 AM »

I don't know what a brony is.
Logged

Defenestration

  • The Sixth Window
  • Tested
  • Karma: 20
  • Posts: 1867
    • View Profile
Re: Shit Days
« Reply #2541 on: November 16, 2011, 06:25:27 PM »

Then you're probably safe.
Logged
Una salus victis nullam sperare salutem

Büge

  • won't give you fleaz
  • Tested
  • Karma: -65304
  • Posts: 10062
    • View Profile
Re: Shit Days
« Reply #2542 on: November 16, 2011, 07:26:01 PM »

Cross-file this under Weird Happenings:

Someone stole the rear-view mirror off my bike's handlebars.
Logged

Ted Belmont

  • Tested
  • Karma: 50
  • Posts: 3447
    • View Profile
Re: Shit Days
« Reply #2543 on: November 16, 2011, 08:00:43 PM »

My car's front wheels are basically fucked. It's going to take around $800 worth of repairs to make it driveable. Also, this girl I'm dating tried to convince me to let her give my dog xanax so she would be calm around the girl's cats, and then went off on me when I told her I didn't want to see her again because SHE WANTED TO DRUG MY DOG.
Logged

Mongrel

  • Emoticon Knight-Errant
  • kodePunc Team
  • Tested
  • *
  • Karma: -65340
  • Posts: 17029
    • View Profile
Re: Shit Days
« Reply #2544 on: November 16, 2011, 08:15:44 PM »

My car's front wheels are basically fucked. It's going to take around $800 worth of repairs to make it driveable. Also, this girl I'm dating tried to convince me to let her give my dog xanax so she would be calm around the girl's cats, and then went off on me when I told her I didn't want to see her again because SHE WANTED TO DRUG MY DOG.

This is the one from the picture?

Oh dear. :/
Logged

Rico

  • Tested
  • Karma: 18
  • Posts: 1916
    • View Profile
Re: Shit Days
« Reply #2545 on: November 16, 2011, 08:25:14 PM »

I swapped lines there and thought your dog's front wheels needed to be replaced. Perhaps converting the dog into a cyborg dog would solve your problems.
Logged

R^2

  • Not in the game.
  • Tested
  • Karma: -61931
  • Posts: 5164
    • View Profile
Re: Shit Days
« Reply #2546 on: November 16, 2011, 10:32:09 PM »

Okay, so. I've been trying to get a driver's license in Tennessee, because I live there now and that's a Shit Days post on its own but anyway

I swing by to figure out what's taking so goddamn long and they're like "lol your Georgia license was suspended for some reason :shrug:"

and I'm all "lolwut"

So of course I can't get ahold of anyone in the Georgia Department of Driver Services because they apparently have just the one person there answering phones and they get paid by the hour not by the actual number of people helped or whatever.

So I drive to Atlanta on a suspended license.

On the way I notice a car parked in the median.

Which turns out to be a cop with a radar gun

Who turns on his headlights after I pass by

Welp looks like you got me I guess my van's impounded and I'm going to jail or whatever happens to people who drive without a lic--

oh, he's going after that SUV. Whew.

So anyway.

Turns out my court date from August? In addition to the $650 fine I had to spend in fees for someone else's paperwork fuckup, they suspended my license. To get it back I must take a defensive driving course -- again, for a paperwork fuckup completely unrelated to how good I am at actually driving -- and pay an additional $220 in fines.

Nobody told me this until I took it upon myself to make a roadtrip three months after the fact, of course.
Logged

Defenestration

  • The Sixth Window
  • Tested
  • Karma: 20
  • Posts: 1867
    • View Profile
Re: Shit Days
« Reply #2547 on: November 16, 2011, 11:09:48 PM »

I got in my car at a college campus thirty miles from home, pushed the button on the shifter stick and pulled back to move the car out of park, and it came off in my hand.
Logged
Una salus victis nullam sperare salutem

Classic

  • Happens more often than you'd think.
  • Tested
  • Karma: -58471
  • Posts: 7501
    • View Profile
Re: Shit Days
« Reply #2548 on: November 16, 2011, 11:39:46 PM »

I hate to ask, but that was the test drive, right?
Logged

Defenestration

  • The Sixth Window
  • Tested
  • Karma: 20
  • Posts: 1867
    • View Profile
Re: Shit Days
« Reply #2549 on: November 16, 2011, 11:50:12 PM »

No, I've had it for 5 years now.
Logged
Una salus victis nullam sperare salutem

Classic

  • Happens more often than you'd think.
  • Tested
  • Karma: -58471
  • Posts: 7501
    • View Profile
Re: Shit Days
« Reply #2550 on: November 16, 2011, 11:52:24 PM »

I got in my car
I cannot fucking read. I am sorry.
Logged

Büge

  • won't give you fleaz
  • Tested
  • Karma: -65304
  • Posts: 10062
    • View Profile
Re: Shit Days
« Reply #2551 on: November 18, 2011, 08:20:54 PM »

So I go to the store and what do I find? Green bananas. I've never understood green bananas. You can't eat them for a few days, and when you do get around to it, you get halfway through the bunch and the rest get all squishy. Bananas are frustrating.

Then, I go to buy some disposable razors and I find a pack of razors with five blades. Five! What do I need five blades for? Two, yeah. Three's good, but five? It's not like a razor gets better with more blades. Who are they trying to impress?

This concludes my tribute to Andy Rooney.
Logged

Classic

  • Happens more often than you'd think.
  • Tested
  • Karma: -58471
  • Posts: 7501
    • View Profile
Re: Shit Days
« Reply #2552 on: November 18, 2011, 08:37:57 PM »

OK kids, this is a buzzkill.

Green bananas are sold because some people like to fry and salt unripened plantains/bananas as a salty/sweet snack. These guys are morons of course, because the only way to do up fried plantains is in thick, nearly overripe chunks so that they're crispy on the outside and almost boozy on the inside.

The five bladed ones have a battery of four blades, which is thought to be a modest improvement to three blades. The fifth blade stands alone, the theory being that single blades are better for precision shaving. As to who they are trying to impress, they are trying to impress men. Womens' razors are not (yet?) as ostentatious.
Logged

Büge

  • won't give you fleaz
  • Tested
  • Karma: -65304
  • Posts: 10062
    • View Profile
Re: Shit Days
« Reply #2553 on: November 18, 2011, 08:59:30 PM »

The ones I bought were.
Logged

Classic

  • Happens more often than you'd think.
  • Tested
  • Karma: -58471
  • Posts: 7501
    • View Profile
Re: Shit Days
« Reply #2554 on: November 18, 2011, 09:27:56 PM »

Evidently they impressed you somehow?
Logged

Stush

  • Tested
  • Karma: 28
  • Posts: 1071
    • View Profile
Re: Shit Days
« Reply #2555 on: November 18, 2011, 11:39:51 PM »

My razor had 5 blades, but I didn't feel like it was enough, so I taped a dozen more on there. Best shave ever.
Logged

Rico

  • Tested
  • Karma: 18
  • Posts: 1916
    • View Profile
Re: Shit Days
« Reply #2556 on: November 19, 2011, 12:18:28 AM »

The next evolution in shaving technology is going to be the custom fitted razor mask. Put it on, move it slightly, hope your face hasn't changed at all.
Logged

Mongrel

  • Emoticon Knight-Errant
  • kodePunc Team
  • Tested
  • *
  • Karma: -65340
  • Posts: 17029
    • View Profile
Re: Shit Days
« Reply #2557 on: November 19, 2011, 06:57:19 AM »

I go out of my way to find the old two-blade razors (Sensor Excel - which thankfully are still made). I simply cannot use the five-blade monstrosities at all. Even three blades is too big, really.
Logged

Norondor

  • Where I'm at is: Fuck you, get shot
  • Tested
  • Karma: 30
  • Posts: 4184
    • View Profile
Re: Shit Days
« Reply #2558 on: November 21, 2011, 09:38:41 AM »

videocard is all the way broken now, corporate assholes taking over property management so we're out of a job, rent going up, spoke snapped on rear bike wheel, teeth hurting again, no money to fix any of these problems

blah blah blah
Logged

fullmooninu

  • Tested
  • Karma: 4
  • Posts: 145
    • View Profile
    • fullmooninu's website
Re: Shit Days
« Reply #2559 on: November 21, 2011, 01:49:15 PM »

i want to complain, but i wont cause i'm shy. pretend i did, cause its pretty bad -_-
Logged
~ this is not fullmooninu's signature http://fullmooninu.blogspot.com ~