So, as required by expectation, I've gone and seen the third film, Transformers: Pink Floyd Album Joke Goes Here.
How does it fair? That depends on a few things. It's certainly a hell of a lot more
cohesive than the Revenge of the Fallen, but what isn't? I'd put it on par for the first film. In my opinion, it loses a bit, being so transformer focused. I know that sounds odd to complain about from a Transformer movie, but I rather liked the first movie's whole "they've come to Earth and we are not prepared".
So let's see, what's
and what's
?
-No Twins. They were originally in the movie [spoiler]to get killed[/spoiler], but the negative backlash had them excised from the final product.
-The robots certainly get more time to shine. Que(Wheeljack) and Dino(Mirage) are given more speaking lines than Sideswipe's single "Damn I'm good", and returning bots (such as Sideswipe) get more time to flaunt their combat skills. They're cliches of course: Wheeljack is named "Que" because that's who he is: a Albert Einstein-headed smart guy with a british accent who gives new prototype inventions and weapons to our heroes. "Dino" is a Ferrari, and as such speaks in an Italian accent. Rounding it out are the Scottish Engineers, the Wreckers. Designed to LOOK like stereotypical Nascar fans, they do not act like it. Explanation for the look cut from the film? They just really like Nascar.
-Laserbeak gets things done. He's a slimy horrible weasel, reveling in his stealth attacks and slaughter. He's even gotten a speaking role.
-The 3D was good. The film wasn't too dark, and other than a few obvious THREEEEEEEE DEEEEEEEEEE moments, it's all well done and subtle. In fact, the 3D is a boon for some people, as it forced Michael Bay to calm down his shaky cam.
-No Twins. I LIKED the Twins. They reminded me of my younger brother, who for the longest time was in fact a jug-eared goofball white boy who thought acting like he was "gangsta" was the best. But you can't please everyone, can you.
-Are you a Decepticon fan? This movie might not be your cup of tea. Shockwave isn't the big bad a lot hoped he would be, speaking only in Cybertronian grunts and not getting a single subtitle. Megatron is more content to sit around then get involved directly, and most introduced Decepticons are the standard non-English fodder. The Dreads, three SUVs in a highway chase, don't even get name dropped.
-Sam's parents are in this movie, of course. As required, their scenes go on for too long. On the plus side, they're not "pot brownie" stupid, just the standard sort of dumb.
-Explanations aren't really forthcoming. Sure the plot gets explained and the characters reasons for doing things is touched, but a lot of it taken in stride and you are meant to just go with it. Who is Brains, and why is he living with Sam? Because. Why do the Decepticons have a giant razor blade dune worm? Why not. How could this elaborate scheme Megatron cooked up actually work considering all the details it hinges on? It's
magic Cybertronian, we don't have to explain shit.
So what did I think of it? I DID enjoy it. The action scenes are top notch, the violence borderline 90s gritty, and the whole thing doesn't feel TOO long, which is what really killed my enjoyment of RotF. On the other hand, the film is still the same pedigree as its predecessors, so if you didn't like those, this one isn't going to change your mind. As well, the ending just sort of... happens. Like they noticed they were running out of film and just said "okay wrap it up folks".
Finale score:
out of 5. Plus 1 if you liked either of the last two movies, minus 2 if you didn't.
