Topic: meetup (Read 7683 times)

Pacobird · « **Reply #60 on:** August 19, 2009, 05:08:10 AM »

Incidentally, the fact that you're reading my earnest attempts to wake you up as to what time it is as nothing more than trolling suggests how narcissistic you really are and how little you're actually considering my motivations. There is someone here (who, out of respect, shall remain nameless) who has lived a much harder life than either of us and yet still manages to think of nothing but others, and I have bent over backwards to help him and will continue to do so for as long as it takes.

The reason for this is that the love of someone who actually cares for others is not hollow.

Mongrel · « **Reply #61 on:** August 19, 2009, 05:14:43 AM »

You know, I had a longer reply typed up... but I'm just going to go with

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?

I could take your arrogance, cut it into blocks and build lavish mansions out it. This is pure unadulterated trolling on your part at this point.

Fuck you and the couch you rode in on.

Pacobird · « **Reply #62 on:** August 19, 2009, 05:16:05 AM »

You will not forget this thread.

Mongrel · « **Reply #63 on:** August 19, 2009, 05:17:28 AM »

Oh you're right there.

Royal☭ · « **Reply #64 on:** August 19, 2009, 05:17:50 AM »

Quit getting angry at the internet.

Detonator · « **Reply #65 on:** August 19, 2009, 05:47:32 AM »

Quote from: P. Birdy on August 19, 2009, 01:13:15 AM

That is why they want you to read Catcher in the Rye in 10th Grade.

When I read Catcher in High School, I thought Holden was a whiny bitch.

Maybe I was just angry at how relatable I found him. I still wouldn't want to be his friend.

Pacobird · « **Reply #66 on:** August 19, 2009, 05:51:42 AM »

That is precisely why Catcher in the Rye is an Important Book. He is an unlikable douche because he is so narcissistic, but his narcissism prevents him from understanding that.

Catloaf · « **Reply #67 on:** August 19, 2009, 06:10:51 AM »

Telling someone to get out more doesn't do shit and is unproductive. It's like telling a drowning person to swim. Pacobird, even if you are well intentioned, stop it.

We shut ins know we have a problem. We know what should be doing about it. But we don't. And we sometimes we just can't. Social skills and social comforts grow at exponential levels. So when you only have a fraction you can't get up and go meet people. The superego of someone with no social interactions doesn't want social interactions because of the rules it's interpreted to lead it to the point of isolation in which it now feels comfortable.

I misinterpreted social norms at a very young age, and never saw the need to see people outside of where I would see them regularly (never saw friends outside of school) and after more than 10 years of that, it flat out feels wrong to do otherwise. So when highschool ended, suddenly, I had no friends, and it's arguable that I never really had any. So I can't really just go out and make some new ones, especially when it will never occur to me to call them in a million years, and if I somehow did, I would quickly dismiss it the same what Iron Mongrel did.

I don't want you to lecture me on this, I have a psychiatrist for that.

Also, I hated Catcher in the Rye, and everything else I've read from its author, it just has a different cultural logic than me. For similar reasons, I think Citizen Cane (from anything but a technical standpoint) is the worst film I will ever see.

Kazz · « **Reply #68 on:** August 19, 2009, 06:20:07 AM »

I am not a shut-in, but I like shut-ins.

Is there a meetup group for that?

apparently yes

Phenomenal, I will go kick their balls.

Pacobird · « **Reply #69 on:** August 19, 2009, 06:26:11 AM »

Catloaf, you do not live very far from me. If you like, I will gather up echidna and we can go out some time.

This is, of course, if you accept you have a problem that needs addressing, which it sounds like you do. I would not presume to tell you to suck it up and put on a brave little face, but I can only assume that your condition and upbringing has not totally robbed you of the ability to make choices.

Fear is the mind-killer.

Royal☭ · « **Reply #70 on:** August 19, 2009, 06:45:45 AM »

Paco, this is very important.

Remind Echidna that he is awesome and I am glad he is not dead. Also I am saddened I do not get to commune with him more.

REMEMBER

Pacobird · « **Reply #71 on:** August 19, 2009, 06:46:55 AM »

We keep trying to hang out more often but the cat works like 3 jobs these days. He is also substantially less internet than most of us and is thus rather difficult to get ahold of.

PM me and I will try to facilitate an exchange of phone numbers.

Brentai · « **Reply #72 on:** August 19, 2009, 08:11:16 AM »

I am not a character from a book.

Iron Mongrel is not a character from a book.

Nobody is a character from a book.

Once you understand that, you'll stop making perpetually false assumptions about people that you've read all about in a book.

Royal☭ · « **Reply #73 on:** August 19, 2009, 08:14:11 AM »

When someone complains about not getting enough socialization and then flat out states they don't want to do anything to socialize, most of us just call that annoying.

Mongrel · « **Reply #74 on:** August 19, 2009, 08:29:09 AM »

Where did I say that.

I said I don't get out as much as I'd like to, and most days at work almost nobody talks to me*, but I do get out often enough. I ORGANIZED A FUCKING CONVENTION for a few people here fuck's sake.

OH WAIT HAHAHAHAH THAT MEANS I'M A NARCISSISST! THE ONLY REASON ANYBODY INVITES GUESTS TO THEIR HOUSE IS BECAUSE THEY WANT THE GUESTS TO TELL THEM JUST HOW AWESOME THEY ARE.

Jesus H bloody fucking Christmas.

*_{This is because there are only four people in our office. One is frequently gone, the second is very busy, and another is on the the other side of the damn building.}

Pacobird · « **Reply #75 on:** August 19, 2009, 08:56:05 AM »

Quote from: Brentai on August 19, 2009, 08:11:16 AM

I am not a character from a book.

Iron Mongrel is not a character from a book.

Nobody is a character from a book.

Once you understand that, you'll stop making perpetually false assumptions about people that you've read all about in a book.

Sometimes, people make literary references in order to show a problem at issue is in fact quite common and has been dealt with thoroughly by minds more creative and incisive than those at hand!

In fact, one might even say this is the value of being well-read! But no, that's impossible; clearly the only value in reading canon is so you can feel cultured!

Doom · « **Reply #76 on:** August 19, 2009, 09:02:30 AM »

Quote from: Catloaf on August 19, 2009, 06:10:51 AM

Telling someone to get out more doesn't do shit and is unproductive. It's like telling a drowning person to swim. Pacobird, even if you are well intentioned, stop it.

Actually, I think Paco is VIP Quality in this thread and really onto something.

Quote

We shut ins know we have a problem. We know what should be doing about it. But we don't. And we sometimes we just can't.

You must realize there is a concrete difference between an honest-to-god diagnosed problem and feeling like you are that bad. Sometimes I mention I have very light insomnia. This usually means my mental hang-ups keep me up until 3 or 4 AM for a reason I can't rationalize as petty until the morning. I wouldn't chat this up with a guy I knew has been up for 48 hours and can lie there for hours achieving nothing.

Quote

Social skills and social comforts grow at exponential levels. So when you only have a fraction you can't get up and go meet people.

The false assumption here is that you have a fraction, perhaps because of the internet. In reality, you have zero and guess how well zero multiplies.

It's possible to forge a meaningful, life-long relationship that redefines you over the internet. It's also possible to win the lottery and not have to work for the rest of your life.

Quote

The superego of someone with no social interactions doesn't want social interactions because of the rules it's interpreted to lead it to the point of isolation in which it now feels comfortable

And we swing right around back to the front of your post. This is a problem a lot of shut-ins have and mine in particular: interpreting comfort as a sign that we're in a safe spot. No. Break your comfort zone. Break it wide open and don't look back.

Quote

I misinterpreted social norms at a very young age, and never saw the need to see people outside of where I would see them regularly (never saw friends outside of school) and after more than 10 years of that, it flat out feels wrong to do otherwise. So when highschool ended, suddenly, I had no friends, and it's arguable that I never really had any. So I can't really just go out and make some new ones, especially when it will never occur to me to call them in a million years, and if I somehow did, I would quickly dismiss it the same what Iron Mongrel did.

See, you're identifying a clear problem I have myself and as a man on the very long, very trying road to recovery, I can only tell you to break that comfort zone. If you can't remember to call someone, carry a note-pad with you every where, write the intention down the second it comes to you, and then commit it to a post-it note on your monitor. Make it unavoidable.

One big thing is to not feel that after a certain period of time, that person is gone to you forever. Approach an old friend in earnest, maybe apologize if you dropped the ball on your end and make an honest commitment to hang out or see a movie or Smash a Bro.

Quote

I don't want you to lecture me on this, I have a psychiatrist for that.

I hope I'm not lecturing you, I just feel harrowed to know we're in the same boat and you're saying things I've said to myself in-between sessions of wishing I was dead and regretting my entire life.

And do you tell this to your psychiatrist? Or are you paying someone for nothing?

Quote

Also, I hated Catcher in the Rye, and everything else I've read from its author, it just has a different cultural logic than me. For similar reasons, I think Citizen Cane (from anything but a technical standpoint) is the worst film I will ever see.

Never seen either myself!

Brentai · « **Reply #77 on:** August 19, 2009, 09:10:13 AM »

Quote from: Constantine on August 19, 2009, 08:14:11 AM

When someone complains about not getting enough socialization and then flat out states they don't want to do anything to socialize, most of us just call that annoying.

Okay I really am going to drop this argument in a minute, but this comment is something I can't let slide any more.

At what point did anybody ask me what I would do if I actually had the free time to do it?

The answer, of course, is "Go hiking, or sailing, or mountain climbing." Because those are things I enjoy, obviously. None of those activities are anywhere close to the things you see on Paco's precious website, by the way. Those people are fucking feebs.

This whole thing started when I made the broad claim that doing a bunch of uninteresting shit like take up Bible studies or learn Russian or yes, play kickball, is a bad bet when you're trying to meet people. If you think what you're doing isn't very interesting, versus what you could be doing that is interesting, then your chances of finding people who, oh hey, are interested in what you're actually interested in are significantly reduced.

Paco then made the claim that everybody should go do shit they hate in order to find other people who have gone out and done shit they hate which I keep mentally associating with the sad girl who stands on a ledge hoping that some guy will talk her down and then become her boyfriend.

(For the record, I have been that guy.)

Where my rejection of that claim became some broad assumption that I am some sort of Grinch-like character who's all like "Activities? BAH!" is beyond me, but I blame the lazy application of the very few things you people know about the person at this keyboard to some sort of fictional, Grinch-like character that you read about in high school. I actually broke kayfabe long enough to tell you how the fuck I got to this point, and that went basically ignored, so basically it's devolved into pigeonholing me as some sort of shut-in, future mass murderer stereotype.

I don't appreciate that. It's a type of rude that is beyond the realm of what we typically consider cute around here. I don't care if you don't see beyond my comedy internet persona, because frankly I don't want you guys to, but at least have the decency not to judge people you don't want to take the time to understand.

Royal☭ · « **Reply #78 on:** August 19, 2009, 09:27:47 AM »

Maybe the point is that when you meet people who are doing something innocuous like playing kickball maybe they also enjoy doing other fun things like hiking, sailing, or mountain climbing? Or are people binary, only interested in one thing and seek to pursue that goal all the time? I think the point of meetup is to provide simple activities that can be organized quickly and cheaply so people can get together and hang out. There's more to doing an activity than the activity itself, which is the point you seem to not be getting.

Brentai · « **Reply #79 on:** August 19, 2009, 09:29:50 AM »

But why
Would you play kickball
When you can
Go sailing?

...no, wait, kickball is belaboring the point. There is no fucking kickball league in OC. It is a stupid, stupid, stupid example.

Why
Would you take up Ghost Chasing
When you can
Go sailing?

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Author Topic: meetup (Read 7683 times)