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Poll

How do you spend your final day?

Having a ridiculous amount of sex.
- 6 (42.9%)
Murdering all of your enemies.  (sex optional)
- 1 (7.1%)
Eating everything you always wanted to eat, even the shit you're allergic to.
- 0 (0%)
Napping.  Why not.
- 0 (0%)
Playing videogames and chatting on the internet, you fucking loser.
- 1 (7.1%)
Go out with friends and have a party.  Y'know, get hammered and shit.
- 1 (7.1%)
Apologizing to everybody you ever wronged.  (sex optional)
- 1 (7.1%)
Hurriedly completing your life's work (that novel, for instance, go write that novel).
- 0 (0%)
Bargaining with Satan, etc, for more time on this forsaken planet.
- 0 (0%)
Travelling to places you always wanted to see.  (note: people on the internet have already taken pictures, bro)
- 0 (0%)
Other (please elaborate).
- 4 (28.6%)

Total Members Voted: 14


Pages: [1] 2

Author Topic: 24 Hours To Live  (Read 1754 times)

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Kazz

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24 Hours To Live
« on: June 03, 2010, 08:30:28 AM »

You rescue a magical elf in the woods.  That elf rewards you by giving you 24 hours to live.  How do you spend it?
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Smiler

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Re: 24 Hours To Live
« Reply #1 on: June 03, 2010, 08:33:19 AM »

Beat the shit out of that fucking elf.
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Kazz

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Re: 24 Hours To Live
« Reply #2 on: June 03, 2010, 08:42:24 AM »

ADDENDUM: The elf disappears and is totally immune to retribution because he's not the point
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Detonator

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Re: 24 Hours To Live
« Reply #3 on: June 03, 2010, 08:46:22 AM »

I would probably cry.  A lot.
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"Imagine punching somebody so hard that they turned into a door. Then you found out that's where ALL doors come from, and you got initiated into a murder club that makes doors. The stronger you punch, the better the door. So there are like super strong murderers who punch people into Venetian doors and shit"

Niku

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Re: 24 Hours To Live
« Reply #4 on: June 03, 2010, 08:49:30 AM »

become godzilla.
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i'm a blog now, blogs are cool: a fantastic machine made of meat

Beat Bandit

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Re: 24 Hours To Live
« Reply #5 on: June 03, 2010, 09:43:28 AM »

Do the lab work leading up to my demise.
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Catloaf

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Re: 24 Hours To Live
« Reply #6 on: June 03, 2010, 09:52:39 AM »

Try to kill as many people as possible.  If life is going to fuck me over like this, then it's going to fuck everyone over like this.

I would more specifically attempt to kill every corrupt asshole multibillionaire CEO on the planet, along with their friends and families.  Then I would go after the neoconservatives who weren't already covered by that first category, obviously the more power they have, the higher priority they would be..   I'm not sure how I would go about doing this.
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Shinra

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Re: 24 Hours To Live
« Reply #7 on: June 03, 2010, 09:55:59 AM »

Among other things, I would rob a bank.

I've always, always wanted to rob a bank, more than anything else in the world, but I'm held up by legality. If I knew I was going to die in 24 hours, I would rob a bank.

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Mothra

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Re: 24 Hours To Live
« Reply #8 on: June 03, 2010, 10:18:21 AM »

Tackle three Double Downs, hijack a car

SUPER HEROIN INTO DRIVING OFF A BRIDGE SCREAMING
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Mothra

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Re: 24 Hours To Live
« Reply #9 on: June 03, 2010, 10:19:11 AM »

broadcast live on the jumbotron they are helpless to turn away etc etc
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Fortinbras

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Re: 24 Hours To Live
« Reply #10 on: June 03, 2010, 10:20:01 AM »

first child pornography and now this?  the entire FBI must be reading this forum.

first thing that comes to mind is extremely public sex.  probably be the last thing on my list so I could come then die just as the police charge through a crowd of ideally cheering onlookers.

constant milkshakes and just eating foie gras by the lobe as kind of an incidental thing, like whatever else I'm doing I've also got expensive heart destroying food on hand.

wouldn't risk trying drugs I'm not familiar with, who wants to spend their last day on a bad trip.

if it didn't take too much time out of my schedule, I'd try to kick somebody I really don't like in the teeth as hard as I could.  if it's a fat guy like say Rush Limbaugh, I'd roll him down a hill in a barrel afterward.
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Büge

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Re: 24 Hours To Live
« Reply #11 on: June 03, 2010, 10:25:14 AM »

Among other things, I would rob a bank.

I've always, always wanted to rob a bank, more than anything else in the world, but I'm held up by legality. If I knew I was going to die in 24 hours, I would rob a bank.

Me too. After all, how the heck else am I going to afford prostitutes and chocolate?
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Brentai

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Re: 24 Hours To Live
« Reply #12 on: June 03, 2010, 01:34:10 PM »

Kindly refuse.  I've already got more than enough of those.
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Detonator

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Re: 24 Hours To Live
« Reply #13 on: June 03, 2010, 04:03:44 PM »

Try to kill as many people as possible.  If life is going to fuck me over like this, then it's going to fuck everyone over like this.

I would more specifically attempt to kill every corrupt asshole multibillionaire CEO on the planet, along with their friends and families.  Then I would go after the neoconservatives who weren't already covered by that first category, obviously the more power they have, the higher priority they would be..   I'm not sure how I would go about doing this.

I would ban Catloaf, but I don't want to be on his list (I probably already am).
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"Imagine punching somebody so hard that they turned into a door. Then you found out that's where ALL doors come from, and you got initiated into a murder club that makes doors. The stronger you punch, the better the door. So there are like super strong murderers who punch people into Venetian doors and shit"

Bongo Bill

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Re: 24 Hours To Live
« Reply #14 on: June 03, 2010, 04:28:24 PM »

He'd go out thinking his victims are the real monsters, which is probably the scariest part.

I'd like to spend my last day saying good-bye.
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...but is it art?

Misha

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Re: 24 Hours To Live
« Reply #15 on: June 03, 2010, 05:02:13 PM »

Try to kill as many people as possible.  If life is going to fuck me over like this, then it's going to fuck everyone over like this.

I would more specifically attempt to kill every corrupt asshole multibillionaire CEO on the planet, along with their friends and families.  Then I would go after the neoconservatives who weren't already covered by that first category, obviously the more power they have, the higher priority they would be..   I'm not sure how I would go about doing this.
get help dude
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Catloaf

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Re: 24 Hours To Live
« Reply #16 on: June 03, 2010, 08:06:23 PM »

What?  It's not like it's a fully honest answer.  It's a ridiculous hypothetical, so I answered with a ridiculous impulsive hypothetical.

Seriously, what the fuck can one actually expect to be able to achieve in a scant 24 hours.  With travel time, waiting for shit, and other people wasting your time by trying to talk to you and such.  You really only end up with maybe 8 functional 'time to do shit' hours.

2 of which would likely be spend thinking of what to do with the remaining 6.  And then there's lamentation and denial and shit.  One can't expect to actually fulfill any of their last-day-on-earth plans.
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Classic

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Re: 24 Hours To Live
« Reply #17 on: June 03, 2010, 08:20:56 PM »

I'd make a point of having more sex than usual, but I'm going to behave as though nothing has happened in the "off-chance" he meant "(an additional) 24 hours to live."
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Catloaf

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Re: 24 Hours To Live
« Reply #18 on: June 03, 2010, 08:22:39 PM »

I would ban Catloaf, but I don't want to be on his list (I probably already am).
I don't have a list.

He'd go out thinking his victims are the real monsters, which is probably the scariest part.

The failed assumption here is that I would be consciously thinking about things at all at this point.

The impulse actually comes from the fact that I realize that the easiest way to solve most of the world's problems would be to kill off a significant portion of humanity.  Yes, it's counter intuitive and down right evil.  I'd never consider doing something like that.  But in a hypothetical 24 hours to live situation, my first want is to do something to be remembered by.  The second want is to do something to help humanity as a whole.  The third is sex, but that's not really acted upon....

Anyway, you guys seem to get the impression that I'm a psychopath who's just one bad day away from becoming a serial killer.  I'm not.  I have way too many mental walls and neuroses to even consider it.  I'm just honest/blunt about the aggressive thoughts being there.  I'd never act on them.   :>_>: ... :doit:
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jsnlxndrlv

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Re: 24 Hours To Live
« Reply #19 on: June 03, 2010, 08:45:12 PM »

Take careful note of the time so that I can perform some sort of ridiculous, contrived suicide stunt that's timed to actually take effect just after I've actually expired. Something like, if it takes four seconds to fall from the roof to the ground of a certain building, I'd like to leap off when I only have two seconds left.

Serious answer, probably buy a quality video recorder and record as many hours as possible of my farewells, an overview of what I'd have liked my legacy to have been, and the locations of my hidden treasures.
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