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Author Topic: Adventures in Slumberland  (Read 73683 times)

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Silversong

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Re: Adventures in Slumberland
« Reply #920 on: August 08, 2013, 11:10:20 PM »

Last night I dreamt that the Angry Video Game Nerd and I, guided by Twink from Rainbow Brite, had to play a good video game together to bring joy and color back to the world.

I think I also dreamt about not being able to sleep. I hate that.
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Sharkey

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Re: Adventures in Slumberland
« Reply #921 on: August 10, 2013, 09:55:26 PM »

Humanity died in one night. The next morning they were reborn from the bloody sea to play out the last day of their lives. Over and over and over again. The sun became old and swollen and the moon drifted away. They climb beaches of their own powdered bone to where their cities used to be. They repeat their last day in the near-vacuum. The sun will boil us away soon.

They all stop and stare at me with empty sockets. They've finally realized. They know it's my fault. They're coming now, mouths open, arms outstretched. The sound they make is indescribable.

They're not angry. They just want to know why.
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Kayma

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Re: Adventures in Slumberland
« Reply #922 on: August 11, 2013, 11:53:03 AM »

jeese dude
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Disposable Ninja

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Re: Adventures in Slumberland
« Reply #923 on: August 18, 2013, 01:43:24 AM »

For some reason I dreamt that Friday was a wandering hobo that had taken up residence in my backyard. Amongst her possessions were a little girl's bicycle and several comicbooks she had stolen from my collection.
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Büge

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Re: Adventures in Slumberland
« Reply #924 on: August 18, 2013, 04:32:10 AM »

Last night I dreamed that Elwood escaped into the hall because Starr left the door unlocked and some idiot kid opened it up to peek inside. I went to go get the cat back, but most of our neighbors had their doors open (?) and had cats that looked like him (??).
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Mongrel

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Re: Adventures in Slumberland
« Reply #925 on: September 01, 2013, 04:26:07 AM »

I dreamed I was at a big art show for a renowned Pakistani artist, whose art looked a bit like Picasso from various periods mixed with tessellated muslim-art pattern motifs. The pieces were all part of an interpretive series to celebrate and inspire crime-fighting and anti-corruption efforts by local heroes in Pakistan and India. During the conversations at the show, I was introduced to a friend-of-a-friend couple who were telling us the story of their own artistic efforts to fight crime.

This couple had decided to make a movie instead (this part of the dream featured flashbacks alternating with the couple standing there telling the story), investing most of their money into a film about a heroic anti-crime crusader who lived in and around Angus street, a very busy and famous thoroughfare in Karachi* which is also very long and runs out to the foothills of the mountains near Karachi.

At one point a big scene was supposed to take place on a stretch of where many hundreds of innocent victims are rounded and killed by the local crime bosses. They had managed to film the scene of everyone being taken away along the road, but hadn't filmed the killing, when filming had to stop. Police came along and told the moviemakers that there had been a huge industrial accident so people were being shooed off the street. The couple were frantic. This was the most expensive scene! What would they do? The whole film would be ruined if they couldn't do the killings in the street.

It turned out that the industrial disaster was the explosion of the Breyer's ice cream factory in Karachi. Huge-waist-high walls of coffee and almond ice cream were rolling down the street. With genius born of desperation, the couple ordered the director to film the ice cream disaster, then edited the film such that the "killings" were people being turned into the stuff. They wound up reshooting elements of the movie for comedy and the film became enough of a hit that they recovered their investment.

The reason I remember everything so well, is that after the art show, there was a dinner party and I was seated at a table with several people, including the artist and Stephen Harper. The couple was at another table, so after mentioning the the ice cream massacre movie, I wound up retelling the entire story at the table's request. The artist (who looked kind of like a brown version of Ai Weiwei) thought this was the funniest shit, but Stephen Harper kept saying he didn't understand what was so funny.

*There is no actual Angus street in Karachi.
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Mongrel

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Re: Adventures in Slumberland
« Reply #926 on: September 02, 2013, 03:47:10 AM »

Two last night that I managed to retain.

In the first, it was revealed that WWII had only been won by the allies due to Time Travel. They were so short of manpower that they had to send back draftees from the present day, who were on pain of death not to breathe a word. I was sent back with them and was lumped in with a bunch of British soldiers, including one who'd been sent back in a weird multicycle, so he was young enough to be trying to teach business and confidence to his younger self who was a bar rat in his parents bar where we all hung around waiting for D-Day. Eventually those of us who'd been sent back via time travel were able to identify one another and silently winked or nodded to acknowledge this.

After a while, the war was won though it took a little longer and was a little harder than I'd remembered and while I sort of minded missing out on the future I could live with that. The main reward I was looking forward to in my old age was to live long enough to get back to my mp3 collection. Eventually, as we got closer to the present day, around the 80's, there were more and more reports of strange attacks on the North American shores. These had actually been very sporadic in the 60's and 70's and were mostly disregarded as odd individual incidents, but now became too frequent to ignore.

That's when they revealed that we'd actually lost the war in Europe and had been fighting a long defeat since then - presumably because of german counter-time-travellers, copying us - but that the western governments had hidden this to avoid inciting the hidden time travellers in their midst. Now the war had come to us.

In the second dream, there was a huge fuss, because someone had discovered that Eli Wallach was actually the oldest person in history - by a crazy margin. According to newly revealed birth documents, he'd actually been born around 1856. People wanted to research this astounding feat and figure out what had happened, but it actually turned out that I had killed him and replaced him myself as a very young man in the 1920s, after luring him to a dinner party that was a trap.
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Re: Adventures in Slumberland
« Reply #927 on: September 05, 2013, 02:59:17 AM »

Mongrel while I appreciate you using your wizard powers to defeat the giant squid on the cruise ship, what were you doing getting a massage from sylvester stallone anyway, and also you could have done it sooner before the squid ate the anime girls
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Mongrel

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Re: Adventures in Slumberland
« Reply #928 on: September 05, 2013, 03:33:13 AM »

Starr just told me that in Wizard 101, there is actually a mission where you fight a giant squid that has attacked a cruise ship. :OoO:

EDIT: [obligatory joke about how I "always wanted to appear in ladies' dreams"]
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François

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Re: Adventures in Slumberland
« Reply #929 on: September 05, 2013, 03:44:34 AM »

Back when my mother used to work at a cosmetics store, one of her coworkers told her in rather explicit terms she had a dream about having sex with me. (I was like 14. She saw me once, for maybe 30 seconds.) Who even...? Man, I dunno.
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Re: Adventures in Slumberland
« Reply #930 on: September 05, 2013, 04:17:36 AM »

The thing was, it was a bunch of really good friends I've known for years

And then Iron_Mongrel is there as the wizard, laughing hysterically as he slows the squid long enough for us o kill it
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Mongrel

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Re: Adventures in Slumberland
« Reply #931 on: September 05, 2013, 04:28:18 AM »

I am laughing hysterically at this very moment
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Brentai

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Re: Adventures in Slumberland
« Reply #932 on: September 05, 2013, 04:31:53 AM »

I can't imagine any other scenario where you, an old friend, and a wizard named Mongrel would be fighting a giant squid.  That sounds crazy!
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Classic

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Re: Adventures in Slumberland
« Reply #933 on: September 05, 2013, 05:02:58 AM »

But the squid ate all the anime girls!
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Sharkey

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Re: Adventures in Slumberland
« Reply #934 on: September 05, 2013, 03:12:06 PM »

Loving the time travel WWII arms race. All our constant bullshitty wars have been an excuse to syphon off the population to fight in the past. We've done the fucking D-Day beach mission in every other FPS for decades because they've been getting us ready. Our counterparts in the alternate Nazi timeline have been doing the same. Except their videogames are mandatory.

Somehow the chatter in their online games comes off as much less racist than ours.
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Mongrel

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Re: Adventures in Slumberland
« Reply #935 on: September 05, 2013, 03:47:53 PM »

Yeah, since it turns out that the Allies were so good at devious shit in WWII, you really have to think that it's the Axis powers who'd benefit so much more from time travellers coming back to help.
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Büge

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Re: Adventures in Slumberland
« Reply #936 on: September 08, 2013, 02:16:22 AM »

Last night I dreamed that Expedition Map had somehow become worth $5.
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MarsDragon

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Re: Adventures in Slumberland
« Reply #937 on: September 11, 2013, 01:14:44 AM »

This is all part of a longer dream, which I think involved work friends and trying to meet them at a restaurant but walking the wrong way and sending text messages from a keyboard carved into my palm.

Eventually I'm attending PAX and I go to a karaoke place, where some friends of mine are playing some sort of game involving dice. I mostly play the game, which involves rolling multiple D6 and then doing something I didn't even understand in the dream. Another friend drags me up to sing some sort of Barbie Girl duet, but the karaoke place is closing at three in the afternoon! We hastily clean up the game and I go home to my apartment and go to bed.

I wake up and the clock says it's eleven, so I worry about my sleep schedule while doing something that involves preparing vegetables. I go outside to dispose of the vegetables (and it's eleven in the morning) but the dumpster is now a garden.  I kind of awkwardly set the vegetables on the side and ask where the compost pile is. While going to find it people from a wedding across the street grab us and demand we all dance along to a song they sing. The sing is about how the bride and FtM groom met. I get dragged around by a random guy and then we're all in a race to the wedding to get some food before the curtains come down. I'm too slow, but the groom is nice and says that as long as we don't out eat the real guests we can all stay!

I eat a bunch of huge cakes, then realise it's like one and I have to meet up with my friends from PAX at some point. One more slice of an awesome rainbow sheet cake (I got a bluey-purple part) and I say my goodbyes, all the happiness in the world, et etera. Then I wake up.

At some point there was also a man riding a kangaroo riding a horse and a man pushing a gigantic tumbleweed with a bulldozer, but I don't remember exactly where.

Man, I have some boring dreams.
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Friday

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Re: Adventures in Slumberland
« Reply #938 on: September 11, 2013, 07:35:18 AM »

So, it finally happened.

Yep.

I had that dream.

No, not the sloppy orgy with #finalfight dream. Worse.

The Zombie Apocalypse with #finalfight.

And the dream was fucking amazing.

Like seriously I think I could write a fucking book all Jekyll and Hyde style about this shit. Fucker had depth. Character development. Heroic sacrifice.  Excruciating moral choices. etc. All the bullet points on the cover of those zombie games with RPG elements you see.

I'm gonna take a bit, write it all down (everything I remember) and post it when it's ready.

SPOILERS: At one point Brentai got bit and Sharkey had to tearfully put him down while reciting the creed from Boy Scouts of America.
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Cthulhu-chan

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Re: Adventures in Slumberland
« Reply #939 on: September 11, 2013, 02:28:19 PM »

I dreamt of a world where flooding was such a regular occurrence that cars were made semi-aquatic, and the roads threw up soft, crossable barriers so you'd still know where they were.  Later, my travelling companion and I bumped into Hellboy and someone I guess he was training.  They were hunting something he called an Otyugh, which turned out to be a shy, walking, flowering plant the size of a large cat, that screeched horrid electronic noise at anything that moved.  Hellboy tossed a noise cancellation device into it's bud, and then I woke up.

It was the Ron Pearlman version of Hellboy, FYI.
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