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[Niku]

i liked zombies when they were still underground

[Niku]

zombies have gotten way too mainscream

[Büge]

The zombie fad is dead.

[Mongrel]

Just another reason Why Bill Murray is the World's Greatest Mythological Figure

Hey, remember this discussion? Well guess what.

Bill Murray calls Kelly Lynch and her husband every time he sees the sex scene in Road House. Which is apparently pretty fucking frequently in the Murray household.

[Classic]

At this point, do you think Murray wants people to start making up stuff about him?

[Mongrel]

He's probably wanted that for years.

[Friday]

<@Friday> also i am still
<@Friday> fucking amazed
<@Friday> by how much girls talk about dick
<@Friday> i mean like I'm going to assume guys talk about tits a lot
<@Friday> but
<@Friday> holy shit
<@Friday> the details girls give
<@Romosome> what
<@Friday> they will discuss at length
<@Friday> your length
<@Friday> get it
<@Romosome> really
<@Friday> yes.
<@Romosome> no what the hell else do they say
<kashan> Do they dicuss girth?
<@Friday> basically everything there is to say about dicks
<@Friday> length, girth, balls, hair
<@Friday> coloring
<@Friday> scars
<@Friday> prefernce
<@Friday> size requirements
<@Friday> blah blah blah dick dick dick
<@Friday> I'm just like
<@Friday> GIRLS
<@Friday> CAN WE TALK ABOUT
<@Friday> I DON'T KNOW
<@Friday> SHOPPING
<kashan> Vaginas?
<@Romosome> what
<@Romosome> you don't like talking about dick
<+BongoBill> then why do you come here

[Smiler]

[12:44] <@Cait> Slightly belated: The real secret to eating Vegemite is to use as little as possible. Some advocates say preparing a sandwich in the same room as a jar of it is adequate.
[12:45] <+BongoBill> Open jar or closed?
[12:45] <@Cait> That's one of the major schisms.

[Zaratustra]

<beatbandito> Isn't gay sex still technically illegal?
<+Kazz> depends where you are
<beatbandito> In a gay man's butt

[Mongrel]

<lark> are there any sphinx puns available?
<Mongrel>  I don' sphinx so.

[Friday]

<Romosome> I am going to make a Silent Hill movie
<Romosome> and it will have all the important scenes
<Romosome> like
<Romosome> reaching into toilets
<Romosome> running into walls
<Romosome> a five minute long scene of the main character trying to open every single door in an apartment hallway

[Mongrel]

Cats were revered as gods by the Egyptians. In fact I think cats have been dining out on the fact they helped shape/save civilisation since those times.

I know, your thinking "cor that Scurv do go on by 'arf!" but think about it.

Back in the day everything came down to being able to store a surplus of grain for a long period of time. It was that surplus that enabled commerce, specialised trades and kept the city state or what have you trucking through the droughts, seiges and what nots.

Now if a bunch of rodents get into your grain I can gaurentee they will spoil it quick smart. Cats nailed the vermin before they could breed up in enough numbers to f*ck with the program so to speak. Thus without cats we might of given up on that agriculture malarky when the crops kept getting eaten and still be running around clubbing women for sex and fighting dinosaurs like they did in 100000 BC!

In brief, Cats arrive in their star vessels and eat the dinosaurs because they look like big lizards that will survive torture for days on end. Mankind is unimpressed with their efforts due to a slight misunderstanding of gifts when man discovers dinosaur intestines and feet artfully arranged in his bed of furs by stepping in it.

So cats eat the mice in the grannery and the grain does not get spoiled and eaten. In fact there is so much left man can experiment with it. Man discovers fermentation, fermentation makes beer, beer makes beer goggles and beer goggles make ugly women look good and that makes getting laid a hell of a lot easier than dragging an unconcious women about the shop you clubbed over the head. At some point between exchanging the club for the pint glass man sees the cats connection in all this and promptly elevates them to god hood.

The rest is history as they say.

This guy has so much great material.

[patito]

[14:35] <Excitemike> who would make a better president: mario or sonic?
[14:36] <adrenaline> mario is a human
[14:36] <Adam> sonic because it's high time we had a blue president
[14:36] <Excitemike> mario was born in the united states
[14:36] <Kalir> I'd say Mario, except for his ties to Mushroom royalty
[14:37] <Excitemike> the mushroom kingdom is our greatest ally!
[14:37] <Excitemike> Bowser cannot be allowed to get the bomb
[14:37] <McClain> hedgehogs only live to about y years old. No way Sonic meets the age requirement
[14:37] <McClain> *7 years old
[14:37] <Cait> Mario has shown the capacity to form alliances with his enemies. Sonic is still after Robotnik.
[14:38] <Excitemike> there is also the running mate to consider
[14:38] * fbm_ has joined #talkingtime
[14:38] <patito> Mario has proven he can grow as a person, while Sonic just keeps rushing headlong into things.
[14:39] <Dr_Nerd> Cait maybe you remember a certain red spiney echidna cough cough
[14:39] <Kalir> yeah, Mario can't just up and go with Luigi
[14:39] <Dr_Nerd> There's your anti-blue dog rhetoric again
[14:39] <Excitemike> I don't want to be one chili dog away from a president miles "tail" prower
[14:39] * fbm_ is now known as fbm
[14:39] <Dr_Nerd> blue hog excuse me
[14:39] <Kalir> I'm expecting Mario to choose Yoshi as his running mate
[14:39] * Zaidyer has joined #talkingtime
[14:40] <Excitemike> yoshi is the worst flip-flopper, always with a new color
[14:40] <Cait> Kalir: Too controversial. Toad would improve his ticket more.
[14:40] <Kalir> Toad is so damn boring, I don't care if he is a war hero
[14:40] <Dr_Nerd> Toad is a stable VP candidate with a precise jump
[14:41] <patito> Toad may not excel at things but he is always competent enough at whatever he does
[14:41] <Dr_Nerd> Not like that slippery weasel Luigi
[14:41] <Zaidyer> I agree with Blue Toad's sea-shanties policy, but I disagree with his "Not using the B Button" policy
[14:41] <Excitemike> luigi can get so much higher that toad
[14:41] <McClain> Mario needs to think outside the box for his VP. I'm thinking Link for the dream ticket.
[14:42] <McClain> Or he could reach across the isle and tap Alex Kidd.
[14:42] <Zef> Nah, not Link. Lakitu.
[14:43] <Zaidyer> Four more years of Peach is four more years of war with the Koopa Kingdom! How many more times can we afford to have our leaders kidnapped and our people held hostage?!
[14:43] <kaisel> Samus, military experience and pushing for more progressive politics
[14:43] <Zef> Lakitu is always at the ready to fish his boss out of hot water.
[14:43] <Kalir> Lakitu would do wonders for the independent voting group
[14:43] <Excitemike> lakitu is in the pocket of Big Turtle
[14:43] <McClain> Lakitu spends too much time with his head in the clouds
[14:43] <Dr_Nerd> Wario already has the libertarian voite
[14:43] <Excitemike> hahahaha
[14:43] <McClain> Wario is clearly green party.
[14:43] <Adam> vote smw lakitu. sm3 lakitu is too unpredictable.
[14:44] <Zef> Wario is a self-made man
[14:44] <Kalir> McClain: With that gas-belting hog of his? No way man
[14:44] <Nodal1> It actually runs on springs
[14:44] <Nodal1> He has to crank it every night
[14:44] <Kalir> Adam: that's just the result of SMBX propaganda
[14:45] <McClain> I heard Wario's company would flood smaller companies with crappy 5 second games and then cash out when they collapsed.
[14:45] <Zef> Come to think of it, forget Lakitu.
[14:45] <Excitemike> Wario actually outsources his minigames to Bomberman Land
[14:45] <Zef> Mario needs someone with experience in government, and Toadstool has proven she runs entirely on emotions.
[14:46] <Zef> Mario-Rosalina all the way.
[14:46] <McClain> Rosalina is clearly a communist
[14:46] <Dr_Nerd> Rosalina wants to outsource jobs to the rest of the universe
[14:46] <Kalir> that'd be amazing but we'd never see it take off
[14:46] <Adam> WALUIGI WEVOLUTION 2012
[14:46] <Kalir> oh hell no
[14:46] <McClain> Rosalina just believes in sharing the star bits with everyone
[14:47] <McClain> no toad is more or less deserving.
[14:47] <Zef> Adam, Wevolution sounds like something that appeals to the Latino market.
[14:47] <McClain> hahahah
[14:47] <Zef> Waluigi has wuevos
[14:47] <Adam> HUEVOLUTION
[14:47] <Excitemike> Sonic has the experience to get this country back on it's feet quickly; also has better music
[14:47] <Adam> i want a breakfast burrito now
[14:47] <McClain> Hueluigi?
[14:48] <Cait> Mike, do you really want to let the pundits dredge up Sonic's past with Michael Jackson?
[14:48] <Zef> I do not trust Sonic. His claims of "blast processing" were fact-checked into oblivion.
[14:48] <McClain> Sonic would bring the worst kind of crony politics
[14:48] <Zef> And while he was a staunch Segan for decades, he was quick to jump ship to Mario's camp to profit from it.
[14:48] <McClain> do we really want Big The Cat in the cabinet?
[14:49] <Excitemike> If Mario is so great, why does he keep all his coins in foreign pipes?
[14:49] <Zef> Sonic is a flip-flopper.
[14:49] <McClain> And what about his associations with "Shadow" the Hedgehog.
[14:50] <Adam> the drudge report has pics of sonic with an underaged amy rose
[14:50] <Excitemike> the only way this can be decided is with an olympic event
[14:50] <McClain> Excitemike, he's tapping into out vast coin reserves. FIght for coin independence. Drill, baby, drill
[14:50] <Nodal1> Sonic is strong within the black community, you racist
[14:50] <Zef> And don't forget Sonic's '06 campaign. It consisted of embarrassing crashes and rumors of affairs with his human interns.
[14:51] <McClain> Vote Third Party. Vote Bonk!
[14:51] <Zef> Now there's a candidate who knows how to climb to the top with nothing but his teeth.
[14:51] <Zef> But his hard-headed outlook towards environmental affairs leaves much to be desired.
[14:52] <McClain> Who better to help us become engergy independent than a guy who killed dinosaurs as a kid?
[14:52] <McClain> He knows exactly where the oil is!
[14:53] <Adam> Bonk has trouble appealing to the agricultural segment. He's big on meat.
[14:54] <Cait> Bonk believes in sustainable meat.
[14:54] <Excitemike> sonic has appeal with blue states while mario tests well in red and blue states
[14:55] <Cait> The animal-rights people endorse Sonic's stance on animal liberation.
[14:55] <Zef> However, Bonk has shown a stark disconnect with the necessities of the modern world.
[14:55] <Cait> Sonic's mistrust of things technological will only turn back the clock, though.
[14:56] <Zef> Yes, Sonic is big on animal rights, but his destructive agenda towards technological progress will only stagnate the economy and kill all science and engineering-related jobs!
[14:56] <Excitemike> Sonic helped clean up Oil Ocean
[14:56] <CaliScrub> he broke machinery and ran away
[14:56] <CaliScrub> that's eco-terrorism
[14:57] <Excitemike> that's why Tails is his VP
[14:57] <Cait> Ecco-terrorism.
[14:57] <Excitemike> he'll swoop down in a biplane to catch our freefalling economy
[14:57] <Zef> And Chaos Emeralds are too volatile in today's market. You can't base your economic platform on them.

[Ted Belmont]

<Egarwaen> ROMNEY IS SNAKING THIS IS BS.

[Esperath]

<Thad> Motherfuckin' snakes on a motherfuckin' plane, apply directly to the forehead!  Attack its weak point for massive damage!  I wish I could quit you!

[Frocto]

<Frocto> What should be 2,500th post be on the forums?
<+Ridley> Tits.
<+Ridley> Fabulous tits

[Disposable Ninja]

... I'm okay with this.

[Büge]

 

[Smiler]

[15:56] * Utsuho (~FaDiel@198.200.215.5) has joined #finalfight
[15:56] <Utsuho> WHORES
[15:56] * ChanServ sets mode: +v Utsuho
[15:56] <Arcturus> Passphrase Accepted.
[15:57] <Arcturus> Welcome Back, Lyrai.

[Mongrel]

<NicJones>  if these analogies were any more tortured we'd have to declare them enemy combatants