[14:15:04] <Brentai> > INV
[14:15:29] <ElPolloDiablo> You are carrying:
[14:15:37] <ElPolloDiablo> a pack of condoms with holes in them
[14:15:44] <ElPolloDiablo> some paper clips
[14:15:50] <ElPolloDiablo> a wad of used gum
[14:15:55] <ElPolloDiablo> a Hello Kitty vibrator
[14:15:59] <ElPolloDiablo> 108 gold pieces
[14:16:05] <Brentai> and a partridge in a pear treeeeeeeee
[14:16:28] <McFrugal> > WIELD VIBRATOR
[14:16:40] <ElPolloDiablo> You are not yet experienced enough to wield this weapon.
[14:17:11] <Brentai> There is an elf here.
[14:17:15] <Brentai> You are surrounded by 8 ogres.
[14:17:32] <Brentai> The Cheetohs are right next to you.
[14:18:07] <JDigital> You're a MALE character. You are non-proficient with VIBRATOR, and
have a -4 nonproficiency penalty to all Use Vibrator checks.
[14:18:25] *** ElPolloDiablo is now known as memo
[14:18:44] <Brentai> Great, now I have the need to make a text adventure where you play a
normal person playing Dungeons and Dragons.
[14:19:27] <memo> I eat the ogres, and crush the cheetohs with my enchanted flail.
[14:19:52] <Brentai> You put the tiny metal ogre figurines in your mouth and swallow them.
[14:19:53] <Brentai> ...
[14:20:02] <Brentai> You have choked and died.
[14:20:09] <memo> YOU ARE DEAD.
[14:20:20] <memo> Of a possible 732 points, you acquired a score of 3.
[14:20:43] <memo> This gives you the rating of Shit-Fucking Cockmongering Dickstick.
[14:20:46] <Brentai> With your ghost vision, you can see your roleplaying buddies carrying
you to the hospital. Most of them wheeze and collapse within three steps.
[14:20:48] <Brentai> They die as well.
[14:21:05] <Brentai> Your score is: 18. You are a BIG FAG.
[14:21:14] <Brentai> Do you want to load a saved game?
[14:21:21] <memo> NO
Bold added by me, because I still want to play that game.