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[Caithness]

23:43:10 < beatbandito> This is a lot like violence jack
23:43:11 < BEAT> Pretty good.
23:43:12 < beatbandito> but with less violence
23:43:17 < beatbandito> no wait that other one
23:43:19 < beatbandito> black jack

[Mongrel]

Okay, it's sort of a Magic joke.

[22:08] <@proplsf> SANTA ANA, Calif. (AP) - An immigration officer has been indicted on charges that she took cash and egg rolls as bribes from immigrants seeking citizenship and green cards.
[22:08] <@proplsf> Prosecutors say Nguyen took 200 egg rolls from a citizenship applicant
[22:09] <@proplsf> what's the street value of 200 egg rolls
[22:09] <@proplsf> like $80?
[22:09] <Draconis> right now I could eat quite a lot of those egg rolls
[22:09] <feb31st> lol "street value"
[22:10] <Draconis> I mean
[22:10] <Draconis> were they stuffed with cocaine
[22:10] <Draconis> because otherwise not much
[22:10] <@proplsf> other applicants paid $1000, 2000
[22:10] <@proplsf> so i am guessing the egg roll guy got a deal
[22:10] <Draconis> is the moral of the story that Chinese immigrants are much better at haggling
[22:10] <feb31st> guy walks in, asks lady "what do you put these egg rolls at"
[22:11] <feb31st> she doesn't have a smart phone, hesitates
[22:11] <@proplsf> trades?
[22:11] <feb31st> guys like "how does $2 apiece sound"
[22:11] <feb31st> lady says "sounds fine"
[22:11] <feb31st> guy's like "brb"
[22:11] <@proplsf> anyone got any eggrolls?
[22:11] <@proplsf> trades?
[22:12] <feb31st> eggrolls? eggrolls?
[22:12] <feb31st> you - eggrolls?
[22:12] <@Seeker> lol
[22:12] <smh_> !mopc eggrolls
[22:12] <Datatog> 9 cards similar to "eggrolls" found and sent to smh_.
[22:13] <@proplsf> are you sure? can i look through your takeout binder?
[22:14] <feb31st> "i put this lo mein at 5" "nah man that's shrimp. 6.50"
[22:14] <scribejon> are they NM (not microwaved)
[22:14] <@proplsf> This eggroll is HP at best
[22:15] <@proplsf> it shows wear around the bite mark
[22:15] <JSexton> they are definitely going to reprint these fortune cookies soon and the price will drop. sell while you can
[22:15] <JSexton> evan erwin is touting general tso's as the next big thing

[Beat Bandit]

[Zaratustra]

I thought it made female characters get a beard, but apparently girl barbarians mages get bow+beard whether they are gay or not.

[François]

Barbarians get a Skyrim-reference horned helmet, it's the wizards who get gray beards regardless of gender or orientation. It really doesn't change anything at all, not even cosmetically. (As far as I could tell after a bunch of game time, anyway.) In fact, the gay trait is actually pretty good in a way, because it feels like there are more harmful traits than beneficial ones, and it's a lot better to roll one that does nothing than one that, say, flips your screen upside down.

[Mongrel]

<Kristopher Wagner> I actually meant to read Mein Kampf about a year ago, haha
<Siegfried1027> I've heard it's really shittily written
<Kazama Fanatic> yeah same lol
<Siegfried1027> if tumblr hated jews
<Siegfried1027> it'd be mein kampf

[A²]

nope

[Mongrel]

I dunno, ole Adolf seems like exactly the kind of guy who'd post long, rambling, incoherent emo blog post with no paragraph breaks.

Which is not what tumblr is, but you get the idea.

[Zaratustra]

more like livejournal really

but he did try to go to art school

[François]

It might be in the dictator DNA.

Editing constitutes an effective means of creation for the director because of the diverse and leading role it has in interpretation. Even with shots that have the same plot, editing can either make the storyline develop logically and flow naturally or disrupt it so much that the thread of the story can be followed only with difficulty. It is only the director that knows how to use to the full the abundant possibilities for expression that editing provides who can move people by depicting life clearly and convincingly. Throughout the whole course of making the film, the director must not cease to consider the work from the editing point of view for one single moment and must always enhance the part played by editing in interpretation by exploring new possibilities.

That's from Kim Jong-Il's The Cinema and Directing. Thank you Great Leader for telling movie directors what editing is!

[A²]

The "Nope" was me posting something in the wrong place and then hastily editing it out, not any response to Mongrel.

[Caithness]

17:15:26 < Nodal> Why is chivalry so shit
17:15:26 <+BongoBill> because it's dead
17:15:26 <+BongoBill> (chivalry is dead)
17:16:08 < Nodal> I dont get it
17:16:08 < Nodal> Have you considered bolding the joke
17:17:21 <+BongoBill> "chivalry is dead" is a phrase that has been used specifically in the past,
                      to which I made reference with intent to provide a syntactically valid but
                      semantically unrelated (thus useless) response to your question
17:18:01 <+BongoBill> and now I'm hoping to strip-mine what was already a low-grade joke by
                      overexplaining it, causing severe damage to the social environment
17:18:23 <+BongoBill> I'm basically a Captain Planet villain of comedy

[Mongrel]

<Changeling Bob> I've just noticed I have a bunch of symptoms for jaundice and am freaking out, as the only thing I know about it is that Iain Banks died of cancer diagnosed via jaundice recently,
<Changeling Bob> and I have health anxiety anyway.
<Changeling Bob> NHS direct said that I don't need to be freaking out, so I am attempting to not do that thing.
<Mongrel> Jaundice always makes me think of Tintin.
<Mongrel> You're only really going to get that if you've ever read the Tintin story in question.
<Slearch> Get what?
<Slearch> jaundice?
<Mongrel> Yes. Reading euro comics precipitates horrible diseases.
<Mongrel> For instance, reading Asterix will give you gaulstones.

[Brentai]

Are we allowed to quote ourselves now?  I don't think you want to allow me that precedent.

[Frocto]

It really doesn't change anything at all, not even cosmetically. (As far as I could tell after a bunch of game time, anyway.)

From the wiki:

"This trait has absolutely no effect on the game - bar changing who greets the player as their lover in the final cutscene, and it also reverses which statue (knight or lady) grants the chicken leg or mana potion in waypoint rooms."

[Mongrel]

The very last thing an intelligent and self-respecting member of a democratic community should do is to reward any public man because that public man says that he will get the private citizen something to which this private citizen is not entitled, or will gratify some emotion or animosity which this private citizen ought not to possess. Let me illustrate this by one anecdote from my own experience. A number of years ago I was engaged in cattle-ranching on the great plains of the western Unite States. There were no fences. The cattle wandered free, the ownership of each one was determined by the brand; the calves were branded with the brand of the cows they followed. If on a round-up and animal was passed by, the following year it would appear as an unbranded yearling, and was then called a maverick. By the custom of the country these mavericks were branded with the brand of the man on whose range they were found. One day I was riding the range with a newly hired cowboy, and we came upon a maverick. We roped and threw it; then we built a fire, took out a cinch-ring, heated it in the fire; and then the cowboy started to put on the brand. I said to him, "It So-and-so's brand," naming the man on whose range we happened to be. He answered: "That's all right, boss; I know my business." In another moment I said to him: "Hold on, you are putting on my brand!" To which he answered: "That's all right; I always put on the boss's brand." I answered: "Oh, very well. Now you go straight back to the ranch and get whatever is owing to you; I don't need you any longer." He jumped up and said: "Why, what's the matter? I was putting on your brand." And I answered: "Yes, my friend, and if you will steal for me then you will steal from me."

Teddy never ceases to be The Dreamiest.

[Friday]

<Brentai> Air Bud sticks his cold wet nose in the camera for 10 minutes in BLAIR BUD.
<Utsuho> Air Bud discovers that he looks pretty good in Armani in DEBONAIR BUD
<@Fridaway> Air Bud works under Mike Judge and doesn't have enough enthusiasm for his job in NOT ENOUGH FLAIR BUD
<@Cait> Office Space 2: Flair damn it Friday
<@Fridaway> hahahaha
* Utsuho hi5 Friday
<Brentai> Air Bud does his best impression of Jennifer Connelly in THAT'S NOT FAIR BUD.
<@Fridaway> hahahaha
<Utsuho> Air Bud searches for that one card he needs in RARE BUD
<MetalSlime> you will believe a bear can play basketball
<MetalSlime> Bear Bud
<@Cait> Adventures on the high sea in CORSAIR BUD
<Elfin> Air Bud sets traps for unwitting hikers in SNARE BUD.
<MetalSlime> The man that turned into a basketball playing dog
<MetalSlime> WERE BUD
<@Cait> SNARE BUD sounds more like it should be about him discovering he can play drums
<Utsuho> The vampires thought they had their first victory, but it was stolen from them, in WEREBUD
<Elfin> Air Bud kills Buddy Rich and wears his skin in SNARE BUD>
<MetalSlime> is it echoing in here?
<Brentai> Air Bud won't quit looking at me in STARE BUD.
<@Fridaway> Air Bud moves to the south and starts wearing poofy dresses and drinking marmalade in I DECLARE BUD
<Brentai> Air Bud gets shaved the 90s way in NAIR BUD
<Utsuho> Air Bud shows it all in BARE BUD
<MetalSlime> Air Bud meets a female dog who pretends to despite him him but secretly likes him in TSUNDERE BUD
<Vance> Growing weed illegally in BUD
<Utsuho> MetalSlime: Air Bud j...just had some extra poop lying around in TSUNDERE BUD
<MetalSlime> STOP READING MY MIND
<+BongoBill> me a dog do geometry in SQUARE BUD
<@Fridaway> Air Bud moves to a random cabin in the woods surrounded by wooden poles, hopping monsters, and fairies in I AM ERROR BUD
<+BongoBill> this movie should not have been made: ERR BUD
<+BongoBill> ain't no rule says a dog can't be the first in the line of succession to the throne in HEIR BUD
<+BongoBill> also he got on the ballot somehow in MAYOR BUD
<Utsuho> Air Bud shows you just how true some sayings are in MYTHBUDSTERS
<Utsuho> okay that one sucked I'm sorry
<MetalSlime> you ruined it
<Utsuho> Brentai, give me the gun
<Brentai> Air Bud keeps getting randomly quoted in VAMPIRE HUNTER EXTRAORDINAIRE BUD.
<@Fridaway> God. Damn. Cats.
<Brentai> AIR BUD, CAT HUNTER EXTRAORDINAIRE, LAPPED FROM HIS FINE ENGLISH BOWL AS HE CONTEMPLATED THE FACT THAT HE WAS A FUCKING DOG, AND THUS DID NOT KNOW THE MEANING OF THE WORD "EXTRAORDINAIRE."
<Brentai> IT WAS 7 IN THE MORNING AND THE SUN WAS DAWNING.  AIR BUD KNEW.  THIS WAS THE WORK OF THE MYSTERIOUS BEING THAT FILLS HIS BOWL FULL OF WATER AND KIBBLES.
<Brentai> THE MYSTERIOUS BEING WHO FILLS HIS BOWL FULL OF WATER AND KIBBLES, OR TMBWFHBFOWAK FOR SHORT, APPEARED SUDDENLY HOLDING A LEASH AND TALKING LIKE A GODDAM IDIOT.  AIR BUD KNEW.  GOD DAMN WALKIES.

[Mongrel]

With every cabinet shuffle, there are winners and losers. Monday's overhaul of the federal cabinet by Prime Minister Stephen Harper was no exception.

The list of cabinet shuffle losers from Manitoba is short: Winnipeg MP Steven Fletcher, a junior minister for five years, was dropped altogether. Fletcher is the first quadriplegic elected to the House of Commons, and the first ever appointed to cabinet.

In one of the greatest exit lines ever in Manitoba politics, Fletcher lamented the manner in which he was dropped. "I would have preferred to have left cabinet the traditional way -- with a sex scandal."

[Büge]

A source in Buckingham Palace, speaking on condition of anonymity, says that the child will likely be tested with the touch of iron, the sound of harps, and the rays of the sun in order to determine whether it is the genuine offspring of William and Kate or the hideous, grey-skinned progeny of a mischievous lilith, sent to torment the Windsors for neglecting their yearly tithe to Hell.

[Thad]

wait wouldn't the gray skin be a tipoff without all that other stuff?