Topic: Spore (Read 17806 times)

Bongo Bill · « **on:** February 13, 2008, 02:47:15 PM »

Substitute your own juvenile excremental pun as needed.

So. In light of the latest and most sincere yet release date announcement for this thirty-million-dollar game about the reproductive structures of mushrooms, I think we should all take this opportunity to talk about how cool we are for noticing that lots of people want to play it.

Official rumor holds that the early-September release of the game proper will be preceded by a standalone version of the creature editor. When is this happening? Will it be free? Nobody knows for sure! That's part of the game!

According to official-looking words, the entire superstructure of Sim Abomination Before God and all related titles is modeled after the likes of MyFace or SpaceBook and is fully integrated with YourTube and the Inter Net. The difference is that instead of being optimized for the distribution of single-word descriptions of photographs taken using cell phones, videos accidentally captured by people waving a cell phone like a conductor's baton, and the attempts of newly-sentient cell phone-based life forms to communicate using the pidgin invented by their masters to oppress them, it is optimized for the distribution and documentation of improbable animals, vehicles, protozoa, and architecture. That's right: you don't even have to try it yourself to see how many teeth can be fit on a small sphere of meat, because the Internet will do it for you! And apply the tags "teeth", "teth", and "nude nudes xbox 360" for convenient access.

I want to play it.

Zaratustra · « **Reply #1 on:** February 13, 2008, 03:40:32 PM »

There's a very good reason to make the creature creator available before the game. According to wobsites, a lot of the content will be downloaded from the Sporenet or whatever. So, getting a million people to do say five creatures each will make for some meaty content once the game is actually released.

S D S · « **Reply #2 on:** February 13, 2008, 06:39:32 PM »

Quote from: Zaratustra on February 13, 2008, 03:40:32 PM

There's a very good reason to make the creature creator available before the game. According to wobsites, a lot of the content will be downloaded from the Sporenet or whatever. So, getting a million people to do say five creatures each will make for some meaty content once the game is actually released.

That's bloody brilliant!

I knew there was a reason for Will Wright being ~~a maniacal mid-boss in the latest Simpsons game~~ called a helluva mastermind.

Bongo Bill · « **Reply #3 on:** February 13, 2008, 06:47:47 PM »

I thought that was pretty obvious. EA doesn't give things away.

Brentai · « **Reply #4 on:** February 13, 2008, 09:51:06 PM »

Sure, it's obvious once Zara says it, but I didn't put 2 and 2 together until he did. Though to be honest, I skipped over most of your post and went right to the next one, so.

I still think it's awfully clever and awfully clever little tricks like that is what's gonna make the game worth playing, even if it is pushed back fucking half-years at a time.

Classic · « **Reply #5 on:** February 13, 2008, 11:21:59 PM »

I just really don't want Will Wright to become the next Peter Molyneux.

Brentai · « **Reply #6 on:** February 13, 2008, 11:32:09 PM »

He would have to have his talent surgically removed for that.

Sharkey · « **Reply #7 on:** February 15, 2008, 12:31:37 PM »

Somewhat disappointed that Wright himself already did carnivorous Carebears.

Remaking all the races of Star Control II seems an inevitable kind of awesome.

Personally, I'm gonna see how many legs, mouths, razors, and whatever else I can get on something. Kind of thing that'll look like a Garthim and die if it stops eating for more than thirty seconds.

But I'm most looking forward to Jeremy's race of tiny starship Enterprises that fly around the universe in a giant Captain Kirk head.

Classic · « **Reply #8 on:** February 15, 2008, 01:09:59 PM »

How will we avoid having our planets populated by walking man-tackle. I can't tell if its better or worse for them to be designed as a dominant predator.

Kazz · « **Reply #9 on:** February 15, 2008, 01:21:21 PM »

Everybody else is going to have gigantic penises, so I'm going to be an enormous twat.

Cannon · « **Reply #10 on:** February 15, 2008, 01:30:36 PM »

How is that any different than usu -

A² · « **Reply #11 on:** February 15, 2008, 02:07:52 PM »

http://kotaku.com/356794/penis-cars-vagina-houses-welcomed

Kazz · « **Reply #12 on:** February 15, 2008, 02:25:38 PM »

Wow.

Quote

We're sure the creator editor will be loads of fun at the beginning — like Miis were. Fingers crossed the game has enough grist to keep our interest over the long haul.

Yeah.

They just compared Spore to the Mii Creator.

I'm about ready to burn the internet to the ground.

Norondor · « **Reply #13 on:** February 15, 2008, 03:09:39 PM »

kazz it really is not worth getting worked up over kotaku.

Kazz · « **Reply #14 on:** February 15, 2008, 04:51:22 PM »

PhoenixUltima · « **Reply #15 on:** February 15, 2008, 06:10:18 PM »

The first thing I'm going to do when I get a hold of this game is make a city full of Langoliers. And then make a city full of creatures for them to chase down and eat. "You're not running! No! You're scampering!"

Bonus points if I can get them to make "that horrible cereal sound".

Cthulhu-chan · « **Reply #16 on:** February 15, 2008, 07:43:26 PM »

FUHNGAAAHH!

Like I've said elsewhere, Victorian panda airship captains. Yeeessssss. Monocles will happen, somehow!

Also, spider-bunnies.

Classic · « **Reply #17 on:** February 15, 2008, 10:55:27 PM »

Newer, Gayer Objective: Make every fucking Pokething.

Sharkey · « **Reply #18 on:** February 15, 2008, 11:29:36 PM »

Or a whole race of fat, slow, stupid balls of meat. I wish you could name stuff. "FREE LUNCH" would be a good one. Or give them nukes and call them "America."

Lobst · « **Reply #19 on:** February 15, 2008, 11:49:09 PM »

Quote from: Classic on February 15, 2008, 10:55:27 PM

Newer, Gayer Objective: Make every fucking Pokething.

Hmmm.

It just dawned on me that this is the first game to raise the question of what a Bulbasaur would have evolved from, and what vehicles/buildings they'd create upon achieving sentience!

They probably wouldn't be able to Vine Whip or Razor Leaf anything, though...

...Ah, fuck it; I'll just make a race of landlocked crustacean people instead. :\

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Author Topic: Spore (Read 17806 times)